Chapter 40

"We'll be landing soon, ma'am. Could you get your children back in their seats?" Hammami asked.

Zahara smiled and nodded. "Yes. Thank you." Then, she looked at Salma and Jonathan who were both sitting on the floor of the plane with Ziva. "All right, it's time to get back in your seat and put on your seatbelt."

There was some very normal whining. For now, Zahara was glad to hear it. She wanted things to be as normal for her children as possible now that they were heading home.

"You must be safe," she said, "and the plane could bump you around when it lands."

"Yes, Mama," Salma said, reluctantly.

"Ziva, you sit in the seat, too?" Jonathan asked.

Ziva smiled. "Yes, I do. I will be safe, too."

Soon enough, they were all in their seatbelts and the plane descended. It landed with a thump and Jonathan clapped.

"We home, Mama?"

"Almost," Zahara said, swallowing her worry for Tim. "We just have to get a ride back to our house."

"What about Marra?" Salma asked. "We need to get Marra!"

"It's late, Salma. We'll called Mr. Gibbs tomorrow and get her then."

"Okay."

When the plane slowed and taxied back to the private hangar in the small airport that they were using, Drake came over and leaned down.

"We don't think there will be any problems, but will you let us check things out before you get off the plane?"

"Yes," Zahara said.

It didn't take much thought. This was how things had to be and so she would do it. She sighed a little. Every step of this return journey was hard. How long would it take before she felt normal again? How long would it take until she had her family? Would she ever have them all again? Could they feel safe again?

The questions piled up inside her mind until she felt she might have some understanding of how Tim felt on his worse days. Her life just didn't feel right, and she didn't know how to fix that.

Then, she was startled by a hand on her shoulder. She looked up and Ziva was smiling at her.

"It's all right."

Zahara managed to smile back, although it was a little tremulous.

After a few minutes, the CIA agents got back on the plane.

"It looks clear. So we'll get you checked through and out to a car. For the next few days, we're going to be watching more closely, just to make sure that everything is settling down," Hammami said and then grimaced a little. "I know it doesn't feel like it is, but it might be."

Zahara did smile that time.

"Thank you for all you have done for my family," she said. "I know that Tim is important to the CIA, to the government, but we are not and you have done so much to keep us safe."

Hammami smiled a little. "Actually, ma'am, I am honored to be protecting you and your children. In my job, I often have to protect people who are important because they committed a crime and got caught. It's refreshing to protect good, innocent people for a change."

"Oh."

Hammami actually laughed and then gestured.

"Let's get you all home."

"Thank you."

They got off the plane together and headed for the exit. The agents were on guard and they were joined by a number of other agents as well. Zahara only knew that because she recognized them as some who had watched them before. They were ready for anything, apparently.

But Zahara herself was unprepared for what she saw when they got to the unsecured area of the airport.

Gibbs, Ducky, Abby, Jimmy, and Levi and Tamara Carew were all standing there, waiting for them to arrive. Gibbs even had Marra with him and she started jumping excitedly. As soon as she saw them all, Zahara felt tears in her eyes and, in spite of her usual reserve, she ran to each of them and hugged them tightly while Salma and Jonathan hugged Marra who was barking happily.

"How did you all know that we would be here?" she asked.

"Tim called me," Levi said.

"He thought you might like to have some familiar faces meeting you after your trip," Tamara added.

"Oh, yes. This is wonderful," Zahara said. "We are... very happy to be home."

"Ma'am, I don't want to rush, but..." Drake said quietly.

"Yes, of course. It is late and we have been traveling all day. Would you come to our home tomorrow for dinner?"

"Of course!" Abby said. "But you're not going to cook, Zahara. You just got back and that would be absolutely mean. We'll cook for you, but we'll bring it to your house so don't worry about a thing!"

Zahara smiled as Abby hugged her again. It was nice to have something be normal, and Abby being overly effusive was comfortingly normal.

"That would be nice, yes. Thank you for being here. It means more than I can say... in any language."

They all walked out together and it came to Zahara that there were now close to ten people protecting three...or four. And she was also aware that she felt safe. Now that they were home, she felt safe. Should she? Quite frankly, she wasn't sure, but for the moment, she couldn't deny that she felt much better than she had before. If her husband and her brother were here, it would be perfect.

But they weren't.

Zahara took a deep breath and tried to set that aside for now. The CIA agents drove them home while everyone else went home themselves, except for Ziva. Without saying anything, she went with Zahara and helped haul everything in. She took Marra out for a walk while Zahara tried to accustom her children to being home and safe again.

Even though Tim wasn't there.

"Mama, when will Baba come home?" Salma asked.

"I don't know, Salma," Zahara said. "But he will come home as soon as he can."

Salma nodded, but she looked very uncertain.

"Mama?"

"Yes?"

"Can Marra sleep in my room tonight?"

The soft plea made Zahara's heart break. She knelt down and hugged her daughter tightly.

"Yes, she can."

"Good."

"Now, go and get ready for bed."

"Yes, Mama."

Salma ran off to her room and then Zahara turned her attention to Jonathan. He was standing, waiting patiently for his turn. Normally, he wasn't very patient.

"Jonathan, do you need help getting ready for bed?"

"No, Mama."

"What is it?"

"Can I sleep with Salma and Marra in her room?"

That deceptive calm in her son's voice was so much like Tim when he was upset... or like Ahmed who showed so little most of the time. Jonathan was afraid but he wasn't sure he wanted to show it.

"Are you scared, Jonathan?"

"Yes, Mama."

Zahara hugged her son just as tightly as she had hugged her daughter.

"Yes, Jonathan, you can sleep in Salma's room tonight."

"Thank you, Mama," Jonathan said very softly.

"Now, go and get ready for bed."

"Yes, Mama."

Zahara watched Jonathan go to his room and she hoped that she could hold back her tears until her children were safely in bed.

When Ziva got back with Marra, the dog was excited to be allowed into Salma's room at night. That was generally a no-no because the kids tended to get her riled up and she riled them up and then there was chaos. Tonight, Zahara didn't care about any of that. If Marra helped her children feel safe, then, she would let them have that.

Finally, with the two of them tucked into bed and Marra contentedly on the floor, Zahara kissed them both.

"I want Baba," Jonathan said.

"I know," Zahara said. "I want him to come home, too. He will. Soon, but not now."

"Why?"

"Because he has to help find Uncle Ahmed."

It didn't matter that this conversation had already happened. Zahara would say it no matter how often it took if it helped.

"Where will Uncle Ahmed sleep?"

"I don't know. We'll figure that out when he comes."

"He can have my room," Jonathan said.

Zahara smiled, even as the tears were closer than ever. She kissed Jonathan on the forehead.

"He will be happy to know that. Now, it is time to sleep. Marra will stay here with you and you will be safe."

"Good night, Mama," Salma said.

"Good night."

Zahara turned out the light and left the room. Then, she walked down to the living room where Ziva was sitting on the couch. She sat down beside Ziva and began to cry.

"Oh, Ziva. What if my husband does not come back? What if my brother is dead?"

Ziva hugged her.

"Tim will come back."

"But if Ahmed is dead, I will lose Tim, too."

"No, you won't."

"I can't do this alone, Ziva," Zahara said and then she shared what should have been wonderful news but really was just another source of stress right now. "I am pregnant and I cannot have this child without a father."

"You won't."

"I just can't think of anything else," Zahara whispered. "All I can see is what will happen if I lose my husband and my brother."

Suddenly, Ziva let her go and turned Zahara toward her. Zahara was surprised to see a nervous smile on Ziva's face.

"What?" Zahara asked.

"Perhaps this will help you think about something else," she said. Then, she paused for a long moment. "I am pregnant, too."

Zahara was so surprised that she didn't know what to say. Somehow, the idea of Ziva being pregnant was just bizarre. Ziva who was always in on the action and always unwilling to be on the sidelines or restricted for any reason.

"Ziva... I am... thinking about something else. How long have you known?"

"Not very."

"Was Tony happy when you told him?"

Ziva smiled again. "He doesn't know."

"You haven't told him?"

"No. I found out just before we learned of what was happening to you and I knew that Tony would try to make me stay home if he knew. I decided to wait until we came back."

"Were you planning it?"

"No," Ziva said. "I... was not thinking that we would have children at all. I was thinking that we would have enough work to do just being together. Having to raise a child would be even harder. But now, we will be raising a child." Ziva took a deep breath. "And my husband will come home to help me. Your husband will come home to help you. We will not have to do it alone."

Then, Ziva smiled.

"And I will have you to help me."

Zahara smiled back, a little tearfully, true, but she genuinely smiled and hugged Ziva.

"Yes, of course. I am happy for you, Ziva. You must tell Tony. He will not be happy with you."

Ziva let her go and laughed. "I know. I will tell him what I told you. It's the truth."

"Now, it's late for you. I know you are afraid, Zahara. I understand, but you should try to sleep. I'll stay here with you as long as you need me."

Zahara hugged her again. "You are so good to me. I'm so glad you're here. I couldn't do this alone."

"You never have to. Tim isn't alone and you aren't either."

And that was comforting enough that Zahara was able to go to bed.

As she lay in her bed alone, knowing that Tim wouldn't be there until he found Ahmed, Zahara tried to think through her fear. Tim was strong, but he was still so shaky. He had managed to get through the initial shock, but she was afraid that he wouldn't be able to get through the next one. She wouldn't be there to help him when he needed it. Tony could help, of course, but would he be able to give Tim what he needed in a way that Tim would accept? Tim had a hard time accepting help from others. He tried to always accept Zahara's help because he didn't want to do anything that might hurt her or make her life more difficult. But he might try to resist letting Tony help him.

Then, she closed her eyes and prayed to God that Tim and Ahmed would come through this alive. She prayed for herself, for her children, for her unborn child, for Ziva, for Tony. She prayed for the CIA agents who were risking so much to protect them. She prayed for Suhayl who had left his own family to help. There was little she could do for those still in Egypt, but she could pray and in doing what she could, she relaxed enough that she was able to fall asleep, for the moment, leaving it all in God's hands.