Disclaimer: I do not own the 10th Kingdom. This is merely a fanfiction.
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"Hands off! Those are mine!"
"I saw 'em first!"
"I called dibs!"
"How about we spin a coin?"
"I'll spin your head!"
"Why not use yours, it's bigger!"
Tony sighed as he pushed a heavy cart along a pair of tracks, Prince at his heels. The three trolls had gotten each other into headlocks and were pummeling each other. Tony rolled his eyes, pulling the cart. Its wheel got jammed on the railing. "Just great," he muttered. He tried pushing the cart. It would barely budge.
"Hey, a little help here!" he called over to the trolls.
The three stopped. Blabberwort had Bluebell in a headlock and Burly was in the middle of giving him a wedgie. The three of them stopped, staring at Tony.
"What did you say, O Fat One?" Burly asked.
"Fat One – I, never mind. I'll do it myself thanks."
Blabbewort shoved Bluebell into a pile of shoes. "You don't seem like your normal self, O Fat One," she said.
"Yeah, aren't you happy to see us?" Bluebell asked.
"Even a little?" Burly added.
"Happy? Happy?!" Tony began counting off his fingers. "You hit me with troll dust, ransacked my apartment, chased us across Manhattan and the Nine Kingdoms, tried to murder me and my daughter on several occasions -."
Bluebell waved his hands. "Let bygones be bygones. You turned us into gold!"
"That was on accident!"
"Let's not sit here blaming each other," Bluebell continued, as though he didn't hear Tony. "Old chums like us -."
"We are not chums!"
Bluebell glanced over at Blabberwort and Burly. "I'm getting the feeling that the Fat One doesn't like us very much."
"I don't like you at all!"
Burly began sobbing. Blabberwort patted him on the shoulders, before shooting Tony a nasty look. "There, now look what you've done! There, there, Burly."
Tony suddenly gagged and wretched. Something slid out of his mouth and plopped onto the floor. He gasped. "How many is that now, Prince?"
The eyes of all three trolls fell on what Tony regurgitated onto the floor. Their eyes lit up. "TOAD!" they screamed in unison. The trio nearly collapsed over each other in their mad rush to tackle the now crawling toad. They piled on top of it, with Bluebell emerging victorious, the toad clasped in his hand. His tongue flicked out and ran slowly along the back of the toad.
"Give me, give me," Blabberwort insisted, wrenching the toad out of Bluebell's furious hand, quickly licking its back.
"It's my turn," Burly snarled.
"You'll get your turn, I barely got a hit," Blabberwort retorted.
Tony wrinkled his nose. "Nice."
"So how'd you end up trapped in here with us?" Bluebell asked as he slowly licked the toad's back.
"For your information I was captured by the Shoemachers and forced to work here. Speaking of which – how'd you three end up here?"
"We came to buy shoes. Lovely leather shoes," Bluebell dreamed.
"We got a nice big settlement from the Fourth Kingdom for the death of our father," Burly explained. "Nicey-nice."
"So we decided to go on a shoe shopping spree," Blabberwort continued.
"Problem is – these Eighth Kingdom types aren't exactly the friendliest," lamented Bluebell.
"I've noticed," Tony sighed.
"They saw trolls and thought we'd come to rob and pillage the town," Blabberwort went on. "Which we probably would have done after we finished our shopping. But those Leather Overlords captured us and forced us to work here."
"Jokes on them," laughed Bluebell. "We like it here! And free shoes with the five-finger discount!" He laughed as he grabbed a small woman's shoe from the cart, caressing the leather, before stuffing it in his jacket pocket.
"So … you three haven't thought of escape? At all?" Tony was incredulous.
"We've thought of pillaging," Burly went on. "Ransacking."
Bluebell snapped his fingers at Tony. "Say – you're a smart guy! You escaped the Snow White Memorial Prison!"
"That's right," Blabberwort added. "Not to mention us. On multiple occasions. And the Huntsman. And the Dwarves. And … the Queen."
"We could team up!" Burly suggested.
"Forget it!" Tony was disgusted. "I don't trust any of you as far as I can throw you!"
"Well we don't trust you either," retorted Blabberwort. "You turned us into gold! So we're even."
Burly flexed his biceps. "You can be the brains, and we'll be the muscle!"
Tony stared down at Prince who was panting. If he didn't get out of here, there was no rescuing Prince Wendell and who knew what else the Snow Queen had planned?
"Let me think about it," Tony sighed as he tried to dislodge the stuck cart.
"Oy you!" One of the Leather Overlords approached Tony. "The Lady O' the factory wishes to see you!"
"Me?"
"No questions – hurry up!"
The guard forced Tony at spearpoint. Bluebell nudged Burly. "Shoemacher's wife!"
Burly's lips peeled back into a grin. "Nicey-nice!"
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Tony was roughly thrown into an elegant room in the factory's living quarters. Everything was covered in pink and satin. The Overlord shoved Tony forward onto his knees. Mrs. Shoemacher sat up on a cushiony couch. "That will be all. Leave us."
The guard nodded, before backing out of the room, latching the twin doors behind him. Mrs. Shoemacher stared at Tony, a pleasant smile on her face. "You've had a long day's work. I thought you might need a break." She went over to a table with vintage glasses on tall stalks and filled them with a colorful pink liquid. "Something to cool you off?"
"Why am I worthy of a break?" Tony's suspicions were aroused.
Mrs. Schoemacher stirred the two drinks. "Can't a boss be friendly with her employees?"
"Employee? You trapped me here -."
"Yes and I feel just awful for what my husband has done. You deserve some … compensation." She handed him a drink. "Go on. It's not poison."
Tony sniffed it.
"Go on then, you don't want to offend your host."
Tony sighed and took a small sip. He suddenly felt instantly warmer. He felt as though a pink cloud had descended on the room. He certainly felt calmer.
Mrs. Shoemacher sat down on the velvety couch and patted the cushion next to her. "Come join me, Antony. I'd like to hear more about your journeys. Be sure to drink that up quickly, the brew will spoil."
Tony felt compelled forward by an invisible hand drawing him by his stomach. He joined the shoemaker's wife, sipping more of the warm liquid.
"I took notice of you the moment you arrived," Mrs. Shoemacher was saying. "Of course, I recognized you instantly, even if my husband did not. Antony Lewis, one of the heroes of the Nine Realms! If my husband found out who you are, you'd never leave this place. Well, not without a significant ransom."
Tony nodded. Her voice suddenly seemed hypnotic. Her hand was on his shoulder. He suddenly felt flushed.
"Of course," she continued, "that would spoil all my fun. It's been a while since anything exciting has happened here. Work consumes everything. Making sure the elves produce their shoes on time, budgeting work hours … it leaves Mr. Schoemacher with no time for anything else."
"M-must be lonely," Tony stammered. He was fixed into Mrs. Schoemacher's eyes. He suddenly noticed how attractive she was …
Her hand slid down his thigh.
"You could stay here, Tony," she breathed into his ear. "With me. It could be our little secret. You would never want for anything. No more politics, no more fighting or wars. Just you and me and our own little fantasy world we can build here …"
That sounded … nice …
The room was getting warmer, the smell of perfumed spice hitting his nostrils. Mrs. Schoemacher leaned in, her breath in his ear. Her hand trailed up his shirt, slowly unbuttoning it. She leaned in, her lips parting, meeting his …
"No!" Tony jumped up. "No, I'm a changed man! I'm not hooking up with a married woman like I almost did in New York! Oh, what am I doing here?!" He was ranting now, his anger rising. He could feel his body temperature returning to normal, as though the effects of the drink were wearing off. "The Snow Queen is loose, do you understand?! Can I get that through your head! Now I got to get to the Fourth Kingdom or we're all doomed!"
Mrs. Schoemacher stood up. "It's the heat. It's getting to your head, dear. Have another drink."
"No, I do not want another drink, I demand you release me and my dog right now!"
Mrs. Schoemacher approached him. "I have ways of making you mine, Tony."
"Oh, with your little spiked punch? Yeah, I'm wise to your game!"
The smile never left Mrs. Schoemacher's face. Her hand trailed up his arm, grasping his sleeve. "You will be mine, Tony. You already are, you just don't realize it."
The smell of perfumed incense was growing stronger. Tony could feel the heat in his body rising again. Her eyes, hypnotic. Those big, full lips, which were parting to meet his. He closed his eyes as she kissed him, the perfumed incense warping his senses, making them more intense.
Mrs. Schoemacher rubbed his chest. "You were dreaming. There is no Snow Queen. There never was a Snow Queen."
The incense rose into his nostrils. "You're right …" His speech was sluggish. "There never was a Snow Queen … I must've been dreaming."
"You were dreaming," she continued. "There is no world outside these halls. There is just you. And me."
"You. And me," he repeated.
"No worries, no fears, no responsibilities. Just the two of us. Our families are nonexistent."
"Nonexistent …" A thought tried to form in Tony's mind, a memory. A girl … oh, what was her name? The incense was erasing his memories, mesmerizing him. "I …" He looked away from Mrs. Schoemacher. " … My daughter."
"No, no! Look at me – only me." Her hand guided his face back to hers. "There is no daughter. There is only me. I am the only woman in your life from now on."
"You … no …" His eyes widened. "Virginia!" He wrenched himself from her grasp. His shirt slid off in her hands and he backed away in only a t-shirt. He turned, kicked the door open, tumbling into the hallway.
"Tony! Tony! Get back here!"
Tony ran down the hall and didn't look back.
"Tony!"
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The Overlords and Mr. Schoemacher came running into the room. They found Mrs. Schoemacher sitting on her couch holding her face, weeping. In one hand dangled Tony's shirt.
"What's all this then?" Mr. Schoemacher demanded. "We heard you screaming."
"That new guy – Antony." She sobbed. "The filth tried to force himself on me!"
Mr. Schoemacher's face turned red. "Secure the facility. Spread out! Find him!"
"You'll need backup to catch him," Mrs. Schoemacher said. She was suddenly deadly serious.
"Right," Mr. Schoemacher agreed. "And I know just the ones."
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Prince was wagging his tail as he helped Burly, Blabberwort and Bluebell load a cart with shoes. Burly kicked the cart and it took off down the tracks to the docks at the lower levels.
Behind them, two Leather Overlords entered. "Oy – you lot!"
The trio of trolls turned, grumbling, annoyed that they were interrupted from playing with – er, loading the cart full of shoes.
"That new guy – Antony – is on the run. We need to catch him."
"The Fat One?" Burly asked.
"Help us," the Overlord said, "and you three will get a promotion."
"Overlords?" Blabberwort asked.
"And a free pair of shoes each once a month."
The trolls roared in laughter and Burly beat his chest. "Count us in." The trio made off with the Overlords as Prince whimpered, watching. "He should've joined up with us when he had the chance," Burly was saying. "This'll teach him!"
As the group vanished out the door, Prince sniffed the air, before bolting through the doorway and down the hall.
