Unfortunately, Michael didn't have much more time to adjust to her prosthetic. Ryan called the team to Ops for a new Dirty Thirty operation. There continued to be no updates on Amanda, but they had picked up chatter on one of their rogue agents- a former cleaner named Liam. He had entered into the middle of a police standoff in Mexico. Whatever it was that he had involved himself in, the team had to stop him. Despite everything they had recently endured, they still had to complete their mission. Division still needed to be cleaned before any of them could go home and be free.
Although a seemingly basic Dirty Thirty operation could be good for the team- it could get them back on track- Michael and Nikita probably shouldn't participate. Alex was required to take time off to get her blood pressure under control. The engaged couple should've as well to get their emotions under control. It was too soon after the accident for them to be out in the field. They had hardly talked to each other about what had happened; Michael pushed aside Nikita's attempts. She didn't push him, not wanting to overwhelm him. Yet, they should talk before rushing into more action. The two weren't ready.
Of all people to be on the same page, Birkhoff and Owen both agreed that Michael and Nikita should've sat that mission out. Owen could lead a team on his own. After all, Amanda wasn't involved so his head would've been fine. Michael, however, insisted that he'd go into the field. He claimed that the best way to heal was to dive right back in. Whether she wanted to or not, Nikita didn't argue with her fiancé. She encouraged him to do anything he could to heal, then she readied herself for the mission. No one tried to stop the couple again. They didn't know how much they could push the two before they broke.
Owen tried to figure it out during the operation. He couldn't get much of a gauge on either of them. Both Michael and Nikita kept their distance and closed themselves off, even from each other. It was clear that neither were okay. But no attempt to break them out of their funk, including a terrible joke, would work. The most the two engaged with their surroundings was when they passed themselves off as DEA agents and planned how they were going to bring in Liam. Unfortunately, that didn't work too well for them either.
Whereas Nikita and Owen would infiltrate the house to grab Liam, Michael would remain in the van. It was his decision to stay behind, much to his fiancée's chagrin. She wanted them to stay together. They always watched each other's backs in the field. She never wanted to change that, especially after the accident. She refused to let anything take him away from her. Even missions they thought they could easily survive could easily kill them. Nikita didn't want to chance anything when it came to Michael ever again.
However, she couldn't pursue the issue while they were on a time crunch. Nikita just had to take the proposed plan and run with it. She continued to try to keep Michael with her. Every step towards Liam was relayed to her fiancé. She wouldn't let him go as a partner. Although she believed that would protect them, it only tipped Liam off to their location. The former Cleaner was ready for Owen and Nikita as soon as they entered the house. They fought with all their might, but it wasn't enough. Their target managed to escape after the damage had been dealt. He ran straight towards Michael, at least. The team could still stop him.
That was Michael's every intention. He leapt out of the van with his gun in hand and aimed to kill. The shot was lined up; Liam ran past him unaware. Except, his prosthetic wouldn't pull the trigger. Michael put all of his effort into the simple action, yet he couldn't do it. He couldn't get a shot off. Switching to his left hand didn't do anything. He missed all his shots. It was completely useless. The one thing he was supposed to do, he had failed. He couldn't stop Liam or save the day.
By the time Nikita and Owen raced out to Michael, Liam was long gone. Only Michael was left, staring helplessly at his gun. Nikita fought the urge to fretfully ask what was wrong. It was neither the time nor place to become anxious. The real DEA was going to arrive soon, and the agents had to track down Liam. They could trace him again in Division; they simply had to hurry back. There was no time to comfort each other for what had happened in the field. However, once they were in Division, Nikita prepared to be all over her fiancé. Unfortunately, Owen had other ideas. He didn't need care, only answers, "What the hell was that?"
"It was my fault. I gave away our position," After taking a moment to study Michael, Nikita admitted her blunder. She didn't believe that was the sole reason everything had gone to shit. She had other ideas about what had happened. But that was left for a private conversation between her and Michael- if he'd talk to her. He hadn't said anything since the mission. Even at that moment, he just looked at her instead of replying or explaining what they both knew to be true. She took all the blame for him while he desperately attempted to move his prosthetic.
The engaged couple needed to talk to each other before they did anything else. They needed to work with his prosthetic, and they needed to heal together. What they were currently doing wasn't working. It was just a holding pattern full of blank stares and unsaid words. Both were aware they were struggling. Yet, as they silently regarded one another, neither made a move to fix it. Michael went to Medical, muttering something about his prosthetic. And Nikita went to the training room, hoping to punch something.
While the rest of Division hunted Liam, Nikita planned to de-stress and clear her head. Sparring with a random partner seemed like the perfect trick. She had seen Alex whaling on a punching bag in an effort to calm down, and she appeared to have been breathing easier. Nikita, on the other hand, couldn't turn her brain off. She kept thinking about Michael and the look on his face after Liam had gotten away. He definitely wasn't as fine as he kept on claiming. There was something wrong. He just wouldn't let her in. Why wouldn't he let her in.
"How's Michael?" Starting Nikita from her thoughts, Alex asked. As soon as she had spotted her best friend wrapping up her sparring session, she hurried into the training room. She had wanted a distraction from her problems. The perfect way to achieve that was to focus on her friend's. She couldn't do anything about the mission. But maybe she could help Michael. She knew he was having a difficult time adjusting. There could be something she could do to make it easier. What that was exactly, Alex had no idea. Yet that was also where Nikita came in. She knew Michael best.
"How's your blood pressure?" Nikita asked instead of answered. She was sure Alex's heart was in the right place. She wasn't just trying to distract herself, she genuinely wanted to help. Nikita simply didn't want to talk about Michael; it'd only bring up thoughts she didn't want to face. She'd much rather think about Alex or even Liam. Nikita had far more control over those thoughts. With Michael, she just felt so lost. She hated feeling that way around her fiancé. But she didn't know what else to do. It was easier just to ignore it.
Hearing the deflection made Alex scoff, but she couldn't call Nikita out for something she had also done. They'd both rather think about the other than themselves. Though, who could blame them. They were both doing terribly. And it was always easier to help someone other than themselves. Nikita was great at that. She recovered faster than Alex, placing her hands on her shoulders. When the young woman glanced at the former rogue, she squeezed tightly and poured all her focus on her, "Hey. I'm sorry we haven't gotten to talk much."
"No. I get it. Besides, I'm figuring things out on my own. I even learned how to meditate from Birkhoff," Taking one of her best friend's hands in hers, Alex squeezed back. Nikita was at no fault for caring for her fiancé. He needed her more than Alex did. She could handle her relapse and blood pressure on her own. She had turned to Birkhoff for help, after all. She wasn't trying to completely go it alone. Though, meditating with the nerd hadn't actually helped. All it really did was make Alex think way too much. That might've been perfect for some, but definitely not for her.
"That seems like a tactical error," Chuckling softly, Nikita clung to the light humor in Alex's words. They could take a moment to laugh, even if silence soon washed over them. Neither knew what to say. They didn't want to push each other to talk if they didn't want to. That wouldn't get them anywhere. The women would talk when they were ready. In the meantime, they'd simply continue to lend their support. Nikita managed to express hers first, "I know this is hard. But you're not alone. I'll help you. Don't worry about anything else. Just focus on battling whatever it was that made you relapse. And if you need anything, please ask."
Alex pulled her best friend into a tight embrace. Nikita returned the hug without hesitation. Turned out, that was all they really needed at the moment. The two held one another, healing each other with just a touch. It wasn't much, yet it meant the whole world. After all, it was a second of peace and comfort amidst constant turmoil. Their promises of never being alone were true. They'd be there for each other no matter what. Alex was about to echo that promise when Ryan found the two. He yanked the women from their moment and threw them back into chaos, "Update on Liam."
Just as they had located their Dirty Thirty before, Division managed to track Liam to the DEA storage warehouse in Texas. He was still trying to complete his mission that had caused him to interrupt a police standoff. Michael, Nikita, and Owen needed to hurry to stop him for good. Well, Nikita and Owen needed to. After taking a moment to think in Medical, Michael decided it'd be better if he stayed in Division. He was no use out in the field. He couldn't ruin another op. He'd only get someone hurt trying to play the hero again.
"I'll stay here in Ops. You and Owen go," Despite his light tone, Michael's suggestion didn't go over well with Nikita. The two always worked together. They were partners in everything. Just because so many other things had changed didn't mean that had to as well. They could make it work. They could figure it out. What had happened previously didn't matter. Michael and Nikita should be partners. No one stood a chance against the two of them. They were amazing together. Except, for once, Michael was on a different page than Nikita. He pushed her to go, "Don't worry about me. You go, I'll run the mission, just like old times."
Nikita had to say something. Then should've been the time for her to say something. She should've fought Michael. She should've finally pushed him. But as she worked herself up to do it, Owen pulled her away. They had to go. They didn't have time to make any arguments; Liam could escape again in the meantime. So Nikita just stared at Michael while she left. She formulated all the words she should've said, prepared to talk to him later- and in private. The two had gone far too long without that. It wasn't like them. She needed to fix that. She needed to get them back to who they were.
After the mission, though. Because of course the mission took precedence. Nikita planned to give it her all, regardless. But that time it was more so she could return quickly and talk to Michael. He couldn't keep pulling away from her; he had to come home. Just, after the operation. When Nikita and Owen arrived at the DEA storage facility, she took off immediately. She was going to find Liam, kill him, and be one step closer to her future with her fiancé. She really hoped they were closer and not even further away.
The turn of events the mission took helped take Nikita's mind off of that thought. It wasn't necessarily a good thing, considering she and Owen got separated and Division couldn't see where Liam was. The agents had to go on the hunt. Luckily, Michael was able to come up with some great ways to help them. He guided them through the facility, leading Nikita to Liam and Owen to support her. It was a brilliant act of coordination that let the agents break up their standoff and take out their target. Liam was finally dead, thanks to Michael's direction. Maybe it was a good thing he had stayed behind. He still got to watch his fiancée's back in a way.
"Now that's what I call coordination," Ryan proudly clapped Michael on the back. While he and the rest of Division wrapped the mission, cleaned the scene, and created a cover story, Michael stood still. He knew he had done a fantastic job helping Nikita and Owen take out Liam. He just felt wrong. Yes, he had stopped the Dirty Thirty and he had saved his fiancée (with a risky play from her book). But it could've gone so terribly wrong. Nikita could've been shot instead. She could've bled out in Texas while he had forced himself to stay behind. He couldn't have her back- he couldn't protect her like he should've. All because of his damn hand.
For the thousandth time, Michael attempted to form a fist. If he could just get his prosthetic to work for him, then he could be the agent Division needed. He could take out Amanda and the Dirty Thirties. He could gain their futures. And he could protect his partner; he wouldn't lose her too. Except, Michael couldn't do anything with his prosthetic besides make it twitch. It was useless. He was useless. Why couldn't he just have his fucking hand. How could he protect people without his hand.
Sorry for the late update (and for the quality, this was mostly written on airplanes). I have been dealing with family stuff. It's all good now, though.
