Manchester
The next week, Roy started back at work – two days a week for a half day and he wasn't allowed to do anything more strenuous than yelling at the team. Jamie was so fucking happy to have him back he couldn't stop bouncing and he'd scored a fucking goal on Zoreaux and his clear mask. It also meant Roy was able to work with the team physios as part of his rehab. His first day back was also Dr Sharon's first day with the club as their official Head of Mental Health & Emotional Well-Being so Roy was her first patient.
Roy stayed for the morning training and then went to work with the physios and off to see Dr Sharon. Jamie was sitting outside her office when Roy opened the door – Roy looked like he'd been crying, Jamie walked over to him in a rush and then stopped.
"Don't fucking push me away," Jamie said, then stepped forward and wrapped his arms around Roy. He almost froze up when he connected, and Roy didn't react but then the other man wrapped his arms around him. Jamie made the mistake of looking through the door to see Dr Sharon watching them. She looked him in the eye and he lifted his eyebrows because what else could he have done but hug Roy. That was what they did – when the other was hurting they were there for one another now, the night at Wembley, the boot room before Manchester, the night of their stupid fight, the day Jamie found out about the operation. Jamie wasn't sure when their friendship had become this but he wouldn't give it up for anything and no matter what Dr Sharon said about being honest and allowing himself both the possibility of Roy knowing and the ability to move on if…well, that was Dr Sharon's word, his word was when, Roy let him down. Dr Sharon stepped back into the office and Jamie gave Roy another pat on the back.
They went back down to Roy's office so he could get his bag, and Jamie could grab his stuff. When they got outside, Roy eased himself into the passenger seat of the car Jamie told him he'd borrowed. In actual fact, when Ruth had said Roy wouldn't be able to get into either of their cars he'd gone down and bought it second hand. He told Roy he'd borrowed it from a friend and they had his car – what Roy didn't know couldn't hurt Jamie. Jamie had planned to sell it when Roy didn't need it anymore, but now he thought he might just give it to someone who needed it. He couldn't be the only one who needed a low car for his best friend who had just had a knee operation that caused him to move in and care for the man he was secretly in love with; he couldn't be the only one.
Roy was still doing half days when it came time for Phoebe's next weekend and for Jamie to go up to Manchester.
Jamie sat in his room that morning, his bag mostly packed, and he knew he was being a little prick. He was really looking forward to seeing his mum but he didn't want to leave Roy – what if the other man realised he didn't want Jamie in his house anymore. Jamie didn't want to go back to living on his own, he didn't even mind showering alone now that he knew Roy would be there when he was done. He hadn't left Roy's house since he'd invited himself over and now he wasn't sure if maybe this was what would make the other man rethink letting him stay.
"Jamie!" Roy yelled up the stairs.
"Yeah?"
"Hurry the fuck up, you're coming back on Sunday and all of your fucking clothes will still be here."
Jamie smiled and threw the last few things into the bag and left the room, he bounced down the stairs and walked into the kitchen.
"Phoebe's gonna miss me stories."
"I know," Roy grunted. "Fucking prat."
Jamie laughed. "You sure you don't want me to drive ya home before I head up?"
"Yes," Roy said. "You're going to have a hard time getting to the station already why fucking chance it?"
"I'm lookin' forward to it," Jamie said. "Have an audiobook to listen to, don't I? Awesome fucking things, I can listen to a book but don't have to look at the pages."
After training, Jamie headed straight out and caught the train. He remembered the first time he and his mother had travelled down to England on the train; they'd played games the whole way and he'd had a fucking mint time. He wondered for a moment if Phoebe had ever taken a long trip on a train.
He arrived in Manchester just after 8 and his mother was standing on the platform.
"You weren't supposed to come and meet me," he said, as he pulled her into his arms and twirled her around.
"My Jamie," she said into his ear with pleasure.
"Hello, Mummy."
They hugged for a long few minutes and then Jamie grabbed his bag and threw his arm over her shoulders so they could head out to the car, Simon waved from the driver seat and Jamie opened the door for his mum before sitting in the back seat. They drove back to the house and Jamie ducked upstairs to shower the train off him before he settled on the couch with his mum while Simon cooked dinner.
"Tell me about Roy," Georgie said, hugging Jamie's arm and dropping her head onto his shoulder.
Jamie smiled.
"Oh, you really love this one."
Jamie nodded, his cheek rubbing against his mother's hair. "I do."
"Then you should tell him."
"I don't want to ruin our friendship."
Georgie pulled away and gripped his chin so she could look him in the eye. "Do you really believe that he would stop bein' friends with you just because you told him you have feelings for him?"
Jamie shook his head. "He's not like that."
"Then you should tell him."
"Oh, Mummy, I wanna, yeah? I wanna and I want him to kiss me. Colin told me after he came out that a bit of him was hopin' the whole team would tell 'im they was gay too but he knew it was silly and that's how I feel – I know it's silly."
"You'll never know if you don't tell him," she said, kissing his cheek.
"I'm scared."
"I know, I was scared when Simon asked me out. It'd just been you and me for a while – really it was always just you and me but your dad was just here sometimes. I was so scared he might be like James, and I weren't going to let you get hurt again and I didn't want to get hurt again. He seemed sweet but I'd been tricked before."
"You was young," Jamie whispered. "Too young, yeah? I need ta tell ya something."
"What, baby?"
"When Dad took me to Amsterdam that time, he took me to one of those ladies in the windows. I nevah told ya, he told me it was our secret and so I nevah told ya."
Georgie's face fell.
"It ain't a big deal except it is and Roy asked me if it was traumatising and I ain't never thought of it that way and so I spoke with Dr Sharon and we had a long conversation about how morally it's not okay but also that it's up to me how I feel about it."
"I wish you'd told me," she whispered, then pressed a kiss to Jamie's cheek. "How do you feel about it?"
"I never worried about it before so I'm not going to now but it's not okay and it wouldn't be okay."
"Okay, okay, I would have killed him if I'd known," she told him. "I still might."
"No," he said quickly. "I want to talk to him about it if he ever messages me back."
"Messages you back?"
"I messaged him after the Manchester game, yeah, it's about me not about him."
"So long as he doesn't make you unhappy."
"I'm not gonna let him, if I forgive him but don't let 'im pull that shit no more then I'm doing it for me and he won't have no power no more, yeah?"
"Yeah," she agreed. "Oh, I'm so proud of you."
"Yeah?" Jamie asked, looking at her with questioning eyes.
"Every fucking day," she kissed him on the nose and he giggled like he used to.
"Dinner," Simon said cheerfully as he came in.
"Great, what's for dinna, Simon?"
"I made a recipe Roy sent me, said it was okay for your training."
Jamie rolled his eyes. "Fucking Roy Kent, I used to be able to get away from me nutrition plan when I visited."
"I can make something else," Simon said.
Jamie knew he would because even though his mum had been cautious, Simon was a good fucking guy. "Nah, Roy's right, I gotta keep up the good work, got our first pre-season match in a fortnight."
Simon smiled in that way that Jamie was pretty sure people would call…patriotic…or paternal or something, he'd look it up later. Jamie did love the fucker, not just because Simon loved his mum.
"I'll do it, Mummy, tell Roy, when I move back home so it ain't weird. I gotta, don't I?"
She nodded and hugged him again. "Yeah, baby, I think you do."
They ate and then Jamie crawled up to his bedroom and smiled at the curly-haired Roy Kent on his wall…he should probably take Keeley's poster down. He looked at the wall and then turned over and went to sleep with Roy Kent watching over him. The next day, after he got back from his 4am training, he and his mother went for a hike in the Pennines and then to a little place they'd been going to for years for lunch. Jamie took a bunch of photos and posted a few. He sent a silly one of he and his mother to Roy and grinned when Roy's response was a picture of Phoebe grinning at the camera with Roy glaring behind her; Roy had a bow in his hair and Jamie immediately showed his mum. She smiled at him.
"That's a good one."
"Yeah," Jamie sighed.
He had to leave just after lunch on the Sunday and his mother hugged him goodbye until he had to leave or he'd miss his train. He hated leaving his mum, but he was looking forward to getting back to London and Roy and the team…mostly Roy.
Jamie let himself into the house and listened for a moment; there was no sound anywhere so he closed the door and went upstairs. He put his clothes away, threw the dirty ones in the wash and cleaned the smell of the train off his body and out of his hair. By the time he made it downstairs there was noise coming from the lounge room. He grabbed the presents he'd brought with him and headed down the stairs.
"Jamie Tartt," Phoebe called out.
"Fifi," he responded in the same tone. "I got ya something."
He handed her the orange wrapped gift and then tossed the blue one at Roy.
"What?" the other man grunted.
"Thanks, Jamie," she dropped down to the ground and opened the present, gasping with joy when she pulled down the fluffy, tie-dyed pillow he'd spotted when he was out with his mother.
"What's your present, Uncle Roy?"
"Don't know."
"Then open it," Jamie told him.
Roy grunted and pulled the sticky tape off his present, he upended it when one side was open and frowned down at the item in his hand.
"It was mine," Jamie explained.
"What?"
"When I was in the Academy, I did a little refereeing for my old comprehensive. That was me whistle and it's plastic, yeah? So, you can use it…if you want, you're right it's stupid."
Jamie reached out to take the whistle back but Roy yanked it away. Jamie looked up into Roy's eyes.
"Thank you, I'm looking forward to using it."
Jamie smiled, his chest tight with the pleasure of Roy liking something so silly.
