Reid sat at his desk nervously clicking his pen feeling Morgan's curious look from behind him. He estimated it would be approximately 20 seconds before Morgan walked over forcing him to answer for his erratic behavior.
"Ok kid spill." Morgan arrived at his desk 3 seconds early.
"Spill what?" Reid said feigning fake ignorance.
"You are wound up tighter than a grandma one letter away from winning a bingo tournament. What's on your mind?"
It was clear Morgan wasn't going to give in without a somewhat believable explanation.
"If I were to tell you something completely personal could you promise to not tell everyone you know? That also means you can't tell Garcia." Reid didn't have much faith in this request.
"You don't give me enough credit, your secret will be safe with me. Whatever it is I'm sure it's less serious than you think." Morgan said unconvincingly.
Reid was sure he would regret this immediately but he felt like he would implode if he kept it to himself any longer.
He stared at his hands while he cautiously began to speak.
"...So say I took a certain someone home the other night and maybe certain events transpired." Reid thought to himself he should probably stop there.
"Ok... A little less vague, a little more detail. I assume the someone in question is Jade."
Morgan tilted his head in confusion and now further curiosity.
After a forcible sigh and a few more pen clicks Reid decided to solider on.
"Yes. She... We may have slept together." Reid learned forward towards Morgan putting his hands up in a desperate halting motion.
"Before you say anything I understand the ramifications of my decision and I will deal with them appropriately."
Morgan's face went from a look of bewilderment to one more similar to how Reid assumed jocks greet one another in the locker room after a big win.
"Who cares about consequences I can't believe you hit that! Are you sure? She's even out of my league." Morgan's voice grew to an uncomfortably high volume as he slapped Reid on the shoulder.
"Of course I'm sure, I was there. Keep your voice down she's only a few yards away." Reid whispered in a desperate tone turning his halting hand motion to a shushing one.
The smirk on Morgan's features hadn't yet faded.
"It was real good wasn't it? Who initiated it? It had to be her, you stutter when she even looks at you."
"She did, I didn't think anything could feel that good, and I'm not answering anymore of your invasive questions." Reid muttered almost incoherently fast.
Morgan leaned back in his chair with his arms behind his head and a satisfied look on his face.
"I'm proud of you. What does that put you at 2 now?" Morgan teased ignoring Reid's disapproving glare.
"Two what?" Rossi materialized at even the thought of any indiscretion.
"Nothing." Reid spoke forcefully and spun his chair back around to his desk.
"Reid and Jade did the deed." Morgan blurted out with ease.
"You didn't even last 5 minutes!" Reid yelled hoping his words would manifest and kick Morgan's ass for him.
"It's Rossi, he'll be proud." Morgan said flippantly putting his hands up in surrender.
Rossi had a reaction similar to the one Morgan displayed minutes earlier.
"Good for you! Are you sure?" Rossi congratulated him with the same machismo shoulder grab.
"Yes I'm sure, why does everyone ask that." Reid uttered rhetorically. Rossi gave Reid a wink before walking off towards Hotch's office.
Morgan leaned forward now in a more direct posture.
"In all seriousness though. I know you care for her, you can see it from a mile away but you don't know what her motive is in this. That's what's really got you wound up."
"I'm not sure what I feel really."
But he did know. He knew what he wanted with a certainty the same way he knew the sun would set and rise again the next day. The same way he knew the evils in the world could never disappear and how the beauty could never either. He knew how the sound of her voice could make him faint and her touch could electrify his every cell. He knew he was hopelessly lost but endlessly exhilarated.
Morgan's voice took a more somber tone as he saw through Reid's falsely apathetic response.
"Just be careful kid. Make sure you find out where her head is at before you take this any further. What she lost... It hasn't been that long."
Jade busied herself with the paperwork on her desk attempting to keep her mind from wandering. Her emotions seemed to be cycling through moments of bliss and guilt that were becoming exhausting. Jade would need more coffee if she were to get through this day. She got up from her desk and made her way into the hall.
"Jade. Hey you, I need to talk to you." Garcia shuffled over to her speaking in her signature rushed tone. Jade adored her but had a feeling she wouldn't like where this was going.
"I may have been told a thing by someone and I can't keep my thoughts to myself." Garcia manically yammered.
"I'm sure you could. Give it a little more effort." Jade spoke with only a hint of indignation.
"I'm sorry you gorgeous creature but it needs to be said. I know you've been through some things and you deserve all the comfort in the world but Reid... He's like an innocent little puppy that if you let into your home will follow you around and love you forever. Even if that's not what you are looking for. I love you both and I'm just looking out for you." Garcia's voice softened as she finished her torrid speech.
Jade's suspicion of the topic of Morgan's and Reid's heated discussion was confirmed. The twinge of guilt returned and she needed Garcia to know that wasn't the truth.
"I know. That's not what it was about. It's more than that..." Jade responded with warmth in her voice but a slight hesitance in fear of revealing her hand.
Garcia's mouth literally dropped open and was followed by a high pitch squealing noise similar to a teenage girl who had just been asked by her crush to prom.
"Really! Oh I won't tell anyone I promise."
She hurried down the hallway leaving Jade to look after her in bewilderment.
"Tell them what?" Jade asked to someone who was no longer there.
"What did you tell her?" Reid appeared in similar fashion as Garcia with a slight look of panic.
"I have no idea." Jade assured him.
There was a tangible tension still between them that Jade sensed Reid would monetarily vocalize. He nervously played with his keys in his pocket and strategically avoided eye contact.
"I don't know how to say this, but what happened between us. Um did that mean anything to you?"
Reid looked up at her now appearing to fear what would happen next.
Jade had to admit that one hurt. Perhaps she was more closed off than she had originally thought.
"Of course it meant something." Jade responded as she shut off the cold distance between them.
"It meant a lot to me." Jade pulled Reid's hands out of his pockets and entwined hers into them.
"Come with me. I want to show you something."
"Where are we going?" Reid impatiently questioned.
Jade smiled to herself. "Why do you have to know everything?"
"I don't need to know everything. I just see it beneficial to have at least an educated guess on our destination." He knew he was close to rambling.
Jade tossed him an unamused glance. They continued walking for another 2 blocks.
"We're here." Jade spoke as she sat down on one of the swings in front of them. She had an amused look on her face seeing Reid's utter confusion.
"We're at a playground." Reid said the last word phrasing it like a question.
"Yes. You're very observant." Jade answered back sarcastically.
Reid continued to stand there awkwardly not knowing what to do.
"Will you just sit down you are making me nervous. You're acting like you never played on a swing when you were a kid."
"Of course I did but not since I was 7 I think." He mirrored Jade's posture and was beginning to assume she took joy in his discomfort.
"What too busy writing your thesis." Jade playfully mocked him as she swung to a height not recommended for someone over 4 feet.
"No but I was busy with studying the...oh that was joke." Reid muttered.
"Well I thought it was." The playful look on her face was quickly replaced by a more solemn one as she slowed herself back to the ground. Her body language began to display discomfort as if she was close to unveiling all of her secrets.
"There was this girl who was in the cell with me for a while. She...she didn't make it. I remember she told me she always took her daughter to the swings on Sunday's. Well she didn't exactly tell me that, more like muttered it in hysteria."
Jade paused, unclenching her hands from the rusty old swing.
"I couldn't even walk by here until recently. I wonder what ever happened to her daughter..." Jade trailed off.
Reid hung on to Jade's every word, feeling the despair in her concealed features. He could venture to guess the girl she spoke of had a rather gruesome demise. The things that swirled around in her head were undoubtedly worse than anything that ever ailed his. He envied her strength but knew whatever defenses she built for herself were there long before her career in the FBI.
Jade turned her head and looked him in the eyes.
"I know I'm not always good at expressing my feelings and can be detached sometimes but I do have feelings for you. This is real. I can't tell you I know what that means yet but I don't want it to go away."
Reid felt his heart quicken as Jade's impenetrable wall began to give way. A part of him feared her words were nothing more than a cruel cosmic joke that reality could whisk away at any moment. He watched her intently as her eyes welled up with tears and he called on every soldier in him to hold back his own.
"I'm sorry that I didn't say any of this until now. You make me forget all of the terrible things that happened."
Jade turned her head to stare off at some imaginary figure in the distance.
"There's peace here now. I didn't think I could have that again." Jade grew quiet as she let a small smile creep onto her features.
Reid reached over and clasped his hand into hers. He had few words to offer her in comfort but felt like he could finally see into that exquisite head of hers. He knew he had fallen in love with her then but had no need to analyze it or require reciprocation. He would give her the time to heal and time to ward off any demons that still resided with her.
Reid attempted to put some of his convoluted feelings for her into words.
"I'm not very good at any of this but you make me feel like I can do anything. There's an emptiness when you leave and I don't feel right again until I see you and can make sure you are real. That I didn't just dream it all up."
Jade seemed to stare right through him. She gave him a look Reid only saw in movies when the protagonist made a heart wrenching speech causing the love interest to finally fall for him.
He removed himself from the child's swing he sat on to stand in front of her.
"Come on. Let's order take out and watch really awful sci-fi movies all night."
"You really do know the way to my heart." Jade playfully smiled at him as she let him guide her to her feet.
He kissed her on the lips softly, still not confident in his ability to maintain full control of his body when touching hers.
"Maybe, but I would like to find that all out."
