9/27 – Tuesday
After School
Shibuya Central Square
"I think there were more people than last time," Ren said, lowering the butt of his sign to the ground, wiping off his forehead – more for dramatic effect than anything else. "Testament to your hard work?"
Yoshida laughed. "Perhaps they're simply here to see you, my boy. They do tend to show up more often when you're here."
"Guess you shouldn't splurge on a stand for this sign then," Ren fired back, tapping the sign in question.
"I suppose not." Yoshida chuckled again, reaching up to loosen his tie somewhat. "Now then, on to business. You've helped me, how can I help you?"
Ren blinked. "Uh. Sorry, what?"
"You said you wished to reach someone with your words," Yoshida said. He opened his hand, extending it to Ren. "I expect that desire hasn't left you."
"It hasn't," he confirmed, and handed the sign back. Yoshida blinked, looking a little surprised; wait, shit, had he wanted Ren to do something else?
Either way, the man tucked the sign under one arm. "Then how might I be of service to that effort?"
Something came to mind immediately, of course, but Ren doubted asking Yoshida for that sort of advice would produce many helpful results. Then again, he didn't have too much to lose. "There's something I have to tell someone. I know they deserve the truth, and it's the right thing to do, but I don't know how to work up the courage to say it. It's...not easy."
Yoshida nodded, rubbing his chin. "Something difficult. I expect you're somewhat anxious of what their response to that thing might be?"
"Terrified," he confirmed.
A glint of something melancholy in the politician's eye. "I see." He was quiet for a time, probably gathering his thoughts. "If I knew that answer, I think I would be a much happier man than I am." Ren raised an eyebrow, and Yoshida elaborated. "There isn't a simple solution, unfortunately. Telling the truth when it's frightening to do so...that's one of the most difficult things I can think of." He adjusted his weight from one foot to the other and back again. "I suppose the best advice I can give is to consider not the best nor worse case scenario, but the middle case."
"Uh." Ren reached up to spin a strand of hair between two fingers. "I'm not sure what you mean, sorry."
"Anxiety has a tendency to split things into best and worst," Yoshida said. "When something is worrying or exciting, we can get stuck in the habit of predicting the outcome as either a total positive or total negative. In that way, we can fail to see that nearly every outcome will have both positive and negative aspects. It will never be exactly how you hope it will be, but it will also never be exactly how you fear it might be."
Huh. Okay, yeah, Ren could probably do middle-ground. "I'm still not sure what the middle case would be in this situation. But thank you, I think that helps."
"Of course." Yoshida smiled wide. "And I wish you luck on your cryptic truth, dear boy. Whatever it might be, I hope the result is more positive than negative."
"Yeah," Ren said, nodding back. "Me too."
9/27 – Tuesday
Evening
Shinjuku
"Howdy there, kiddo!" Chihaya greeted Ren with a smile and a wave, like an old friend and not someone at least ten years her junior that she'd only interacted with on two previous occasions.
"Howdy." He sat down across from her. The street seemed a little less bustling than the last time he'd been, and Ren could only hope it wasn't affecting the woman's business too heavily.
"Here for a fortune?" she asked, already beginning to shuffle her tarot deck in that oddly hypnotic way she did.
He shook his head. "Actually, I'd like your advice on something. You're an expert on fate and stuff, right?"
Chihaya stalled, seeming genuinely perplexed. "Suppose that's the case. Couldn't say I'm much of a genuine expert, but I know my way around predetermination, if that's on your mind."
"Yeah." Ren took a breath in and out. This wasn't exactly easy to admit, even in veiled language, even to someone who wouldn't hold him accountable. It still stuck in his throat like dust on sunbeams. "Do you know of anyone who's defied their destiny? Like, when you predict the future, is that always how things will turn out, or is it possible to change that?"
The woman stared at him for a long few seconds. She leaned back, a long whistle escaping her. "Hell of a question," she said, almost too quiet to hear. "You're asking if my fortunes are fallible?"
Oh. Uh, shit, that wasn't...wait, actually? Sure. Fuck it. "Not just yours, but yeah."
"Not just mine," she repeated, rubbing her chin. Then Chihaya sent him a little glare. Was it playful? There was an odd little cant to her lips, like the implication of a smirk. "Did you get your fortune told with someone else?"
Ren could have laughed, but he just threw on an awkward smile instead. "I, uh, might have. Just to compare."
The fortune-teller burst out laughing. "And did their Fool end up on fire too?"
He shook his head. "It didn't come up, actually. I sorta...asked about something more specific, and they gave me an answer I'm not sure about."
"Hm." Chihaya leaned back in, her attention clearly piqued. "What sort of specifics?"
Ren shrugged, trying to play it cool. "Sort of a tough decision. I'm trying to figure something out about a friend, and I asked what I should do. They told me I was destined to end up...uh, I mean, make a specific choice. But I'm not sure if that 'fated decision' is the right one. So I was wondering, if I end up changing my mind, or if something else changes, am I still stuck with that?"
Chihaya nodded, gaze wandering, squinting off at nothing. "Changing fate's not an easy thing," she said, finally. "Not many people even try to attempt it, and fewer still succeed. I've only seen it happen once before, and that was courtesy of some pretty extensive meddling." Meddling, huh? Yellow eyes in the dark of the back of his mind. Ren stifled a shudder. "I can say for a fact that it's possible. The future ain't set in stone, or cardboard." Chihaya chuckled. "But it's a gutsy thing to try. If it really matters to you that much, I'd say go for it. And if you need a helping hand on the way, I might be able to lend you a couple." She wiggled her fingers for emphasis.
He nodded. "Thanks. I think that's helpful to know." Ren reached into his pocket and counted a small handful of yen coins into his palm, then slid them across the booth. "Here. For your time."
The woman chuckled, and took a single coin, then slid the rest back. "Thanks, kid. But let's just put that aside for now, alright? If you really do end up defying your fate, then you'll owe me." And Chihaya winked. "Good luck, by the way. I'll be rooting for you."
9/28 – Wednesday
After School
Shujin Academy, Maruki's Office
Maruki took a long sip on his juice box, probably to gather his thoughts. "Middle case is definitely good advice. I think whoever gave you that might be taking a run on my job soon." He laughed.
Ren forced a chuckle over his frantic heartbeat. "Yeah. I'm just...I keep running it through in my head, and even middle case still sounds bad. Maybe I just don't know for sure what it is."
"Could you tell me what that might be?" he asked.
"Like, she's frustrated that I didn't say it earlier, and things are probably weird and awkward between us, and then we both move on?" Honestly, even that sounded far more optimistic than likely. "And, uh, nothing else changes."
Maruki nodded. "I think I can reasonably estimate what your worst case might be, but what would you say the best case is?"
Ren shrugged. "I dunno. That nothing bad happens, I guess."
"Hm." He adjusted himself on the couch. "Ren, as your therapist, I'm going to address that. Because I feel you might be coming at this in a very unhelpful way."
"Okay," Ren said, stretching the word out over a second. Unhelpful. Yeah, probably, that wasn't really in question. This wasn't about Ren though, his importance in this was basically secondary, circumstantial. He was the messenger. Nothing more.
"You mentioned you wanted to do this because you felt it's the right thing," Maruki continued. "Because she deserves the truth. While that's quite kind of you, it's not very fair to yourself. This situation involves the both of you, and your opinion on the outcome is very important."
"I don't have one–" Ren protested, then cut himself off. "Sorry."
Maruki just smiled. "Nothing you need to apologize for. I mean to say that apathy is an opinion, and it implies far more to me than simply that you don't care either way. Your relationships are a major facet of your life, and I cannot advise strongly enough against pushing yourself into one because someone else might want that of you."
Ren felt his blood drain from his face. "Oh, no, I mean, I wouldn't...that's not what I'm..." He brought his hands up, pressing his fingers into his forehead, covering his face. "I don't...not want that. It's not that I don't care, it's just that..." A sigh, and he dragged his hands away. "I dunno. I think I'm just scared I'm chasing dreams, and not being realistic. What if I want something more out of–" he threw his fingers up into scare quotes, "–us, something that isn't there? Like how much of what I feel is actually about her, and how much of it is just about some memory, some fake thing in my head?" Fuck, this was miserable. Having to distort the truth to make it sensible, feeling more and more psychotic by the second, rambling at nonsense that was probably just him being stupid again. This sucked. This was awful.
"Deep breaths," Maruki reminded. "Take a moment. Just breathe with me, please."
"Okay." Ren focused. In. And out. In. And out. Hold. And release. Hold. And release. "Sorry. I'm just scared." He laughed, and he didn't know why.
"That's very understandable." Maruki's smile seemed genuine, and Ren could only hope it really was. "None of what you just described to me sounds like anything out of the ordinary though." He chuckled. "Very few people pursue relationships out of realism, or some objective analysis. We all chase dreams, Ren. That might be all that love really is, but I don't think I'm very qualified to speak on that fact. Either way, I wouldn't write off your feelings. They deserve just as much attention and respect as hers."
Ren nodded. "Okay. I guess...I'll try and keep that in mind." The thought caught on the knot in his throat, tickling there, settling. 'Love is just chasing dreams,' huh? It was a pretty sentiment, but probably a pretty dangerous one too. Ren's dreams weren't often free of melancholy, or bitterness, or nostalgia. But...they were beautiful. They hurt more in their absence than their presence. So maybe he could live with that.
9/28 – Wednesday
Late Afternoon
Shujin Academy, Rooftop
"Sorry I'm late," Ren said, the second he pushed over the door.
Haru merely laughed, straightening up and brushing herself off. "Not at all. You mentioned as much when we made plans, after all." She tilted her head ever so slightly. "You could change into your gym clothes as well, if you want. It is rather dirty work." True to her word, the young woman's outfit was nearly more smudge and stain than fabric. Some looked older than others, maybe by years. It was hard to tell. "And I don't mind waiting."
Ren just shrugged. "I'm doing laundry tomorrow, I'll be cool." He didn't want to put this off. Every second he waited was another chance he'd just chicken out and leave it another day unsaid. This was too important for that, too important to fuck up.
Haru hummed a quiet noise of what might have been disapproval. "Alright, if you say so." Then she smiled. "In that case, no dilly-dallying. I'll expect prompt work from you, Mister Amamiya."
He laughed before he could stop himself, a chuckle bubbling up out of him. "Okay, okay. Gloves?"
"On the table." Haru rubbed her hands together. "Let's get gardening."
"I'm not boring you, am I?" Haru asked, scrunching up her face in a way that was sort of sheepish and sort of apologetic and sort of adorable.
"Talking about seeds? Not at all." He smiled at her, then looked back away again. "I just don't have much to add. It's cool though, and I like hearing about the stuff people are interested in." Ren kept his focus on the dirt, on the onions, on the act of careful excavation. Kept his eyes down, as much as he could. "Futaba's told me all about like ten different shows I hadn't even heard about before then."
"You're a very sweet big brother," she said, returning his smile with one of her own. "And a sweet friend."
"I dunno," Ren said with a shrug. "Just doing my best."
"Yes, I know." She laughed. "That's what makes you sweet."
The guilt bled through his ribs and clenched at his chest. He didn't say anything. He kept his eyes down.
"Ren?" Her voice was so fucking concerned, and that only made it worse. "Are you alright? You look quite tense."
"Sorry," he mumbled. "Just...sorry."
"Whatever for?" She placed her trowel down, pivoting slightly to face him. "If you're not feeling well, you shouldn't push yourself. It's not wise to–"
"No, it's, uh, sorry. It's not..." Ren tried to catch an errant breath. "I'm just kinda nervous. I might have...had sort of, uh, ulterior motives. For asking to help you."
"Ren." Her voice was momentarily stern, almost cold. "Please don't panic on me."
He nodded. The trowel left his fingers, and he let it slip silently into the dirt. "Okay. I won't." Deep breath in – or as close to it as he could – and back out. "There's something I have to tell you. And it's, just, kinda hard to."
Haru nodded. "That's perfectly alright." She sounded...not angry. That was a good start, at least. And she stood up, still slightly crouched over to extend a hand to him. "Let's take a break then, and talk."
Please, brain, please fucking work. "Yeah." He took her hand, let Haru pull him back to standing. "Sorry again."
She giggled. "For someone as clever as you, Ren, you apologize quite a lot for very small things."
"Uh." He reached up to spin a strand of hair between two gloved fingers. "Guess I do. Um, sorry?"
That got another laugh. Haru gestured with her head to the nearby table, and Ren gladly followed her lead. "Now then," she said, once they'd both sat down. "What is it you have to tell me?"
Inhalation. Exhalation. Okay. No backing down now. "It's about Anachronism's memories," he began.
"Oh!" Haru started, blinking slightly. Okay, that reaction threw every ounce of readiness out the fucking window. "Oh, no, I'm sorry, I didn't mean to throw you off. I simply...I remembered something I'd been meaning to ask you. I'll wait until you're done though."
He shook his head, throwing on a smile. "No, it's alright, go ahead. I'm kinda curious now."
She gave a little embarrassed-sounding laugh, and nodded. "Alright." Despite her agreement, she still paused for a moment, maybe to collect her thoughts. "You mentioned before that I was in those memories. Or, that you've seen the me that lived in that world, at least." Shit. Ren felt a cold sweat prickle across his body in a wave."But you also mentioned that not all of the Persona-users who worked with him were Thieves, exactly. Was I one of those not-quite-Thieves?"
Huh. Okay, that was so much of a lighter question than he was expecting, holy shit. Not that she would have known, but still. He could work with that, one hundred percent. "You weren't. I mean, you were, like, you were a Thief. As far as I could tell, at least. I mean, there were only two people who weren't, and they're both Thieves right now."
"Ah, alright." Haru looked just as relieved as Ren felt. "That's good to hear. I was almost afraid..." She pursed her lips.
"Like you'd blown your shot?" he asked, the words slipping out of him before he could catch them.
"Yes," she said, with a soft little smile. "I've grown closer to you all over the past few weeks than I expected myself to, and while I am still far from truly being able to count myself as one of your ranks, I do feel as though I wish to." Haru hummed out a little giggle. "I understand that's somewhat of a universal experience for early Thieves, though."
He laughed too, and he wasn't even sure how he managed that. "Yeah, pretty much. That tends to wear off, though, after a little while."
"I've heard that as well." She smiled across the table at him. "But I won't let you distract yourself with my problems. You're not getting off the hook that easily."
Ren snapped his fingers. "Aww, darn. Almost got away with it, too."
Haru laughed. "Please, continue. I'd like to know what you have to say."
This was still pretty mortifying, but it felt somehow less so. Like an air of tension had been lifted between them, or off of Ren. Maybe that was a good sign, or a concerning one. He didn't know. "His memories didn't come all at once," he said, as steadily as he could manage. "It was sort of bits and pieces. And no names, no clear faces, just...emotions, little vague details. Like a dream you can't quite remember." Haru nodded along, attention seemingly focused solely on Ren; and he tried not to squirm. "And a while back, I started getting memories of him and, uh, his partners."
"Partners," Haru repeated, looking a little confused.
"Romantic partners," he elaborated. "Plural. Uh, two of them. One was pretty obvious to figure out, I mean, considering I'm...dating him, currently." She giggled a little at that, and he couldn't help but crack a smile too. "And the other one wasn't...as obvious. Cause, well, I uh...I hadn't...met her, yet." He couldn't look at Haru. He could barely breathe. "And, uh, it...was you." Biting back another apology, he chanced a glance her way.
Haru's eyes were wide. Blinking quickly, her composure distinctly rattled. Twitching through multiple imperceptible emotions rapid-fire. "I see," she said, slowly.
"And, uh," he swallowed hard, "I'm sorry for not telling you sooner, I kinda feel like a piece of shit for not saying anything." Words were coming faster now, easier, like a spigot abruptly knocked off its spout. "I mean, it's...I don't want to, like, treat you any differently because of those memories? I don't want there to be pressure or anything for us to, uh, yeah, just because of what happened in that timeline."
She nodded, the motion seeming almost difficult for her. "Of course. That makes sense." Her voice was quiet, nearly empty. Neutral to the point of astral void. "And the future isn't set in stone, anyway. You said that before."
He nodded. "Yeah. It's not...I mean, Anachronism fucked up a lot of things, and I...he did some stuff right too, like it wasn't like he fucked up everything, but I just don't want to repeat his mistakes."
"His mistakes," she said. There was an odd frigidity now, something tense across her words. Haru glanced towards him too quickly to pull even a single emotion from, and then away. When she spoke again, it was once more absent of emotion. "Do you believe that his choice in romantic partners was one of his mistakes?"
Ren blinked. "I think his choice to lie to all of his friends was," he said. "To not tell them the truth, even when it mattered. Especially when it mattered." Why would she ask him about that? Her being angry made sense, but not...what she seemed angry about. It just didn't add up in his head. "I don't...I don't know about the other one. I just know he's his own guy, and she's her own girl. We used to be the same people that they were, but we're not anymore. We don't have to be them. We get to be with who we want to be with. I don't want to..." He knew the words. 'Hurt you;' far easier thought than said.
Haru didn't say a word. Not for a long, long time. "Thank you for telling me," she said, quietly, simply. She smiled, plastic as the first day he'd met her, and something chipped off the inside of Ren's chest. "I think you're probably busy, so I won't keep you any longer."
"Uh," Ren said, "I mean, I did come here to help you, and I don't just want to dump that in your lap and then leave."
"Thank you," she said, a little too quick to be polite. "But I'll be alright. I am quite strong, if you remember. More than capable of handling this on my own."
If a clearer cue to leave had ever been given, Ren hadn't seen it. "Right. Okay." He stood, and took a step towards the door, and remembered he still had those borrowed gloves on, and shucked them, and handed them back to her. "I'll see you at school tomorrow." And he walked out. He didn't look back. He couldn't. Door open, door closed, out of the orange glow and into the dim staircase hallway. And all the strength left him. Ren leaned back against the closed door, sinking down to seated. Every molecule of oxygen left his lungs at once. Fuck. Fuck.
"Ren?" He looked up. Morgana sitting right at the top of the stairs right where he'd insisted he'd be earlier, tilting his head, a concerned look on his fuzzy face. "Did it go okay?"
He didn't know how to answer. He didn't know how to say anything. Ren was petrified that the moment a single word left his lips, it'd all come crashing down. His ears felt hot and his tongue felt limp and his eyes prickled at the seams. He felt like he was dying. "No," he finally choked out.
Morgana immediately closed the distance, squirming his way into Ren's arms, rubbing his face against him. Purring – not out of joy, but out of worry, out of love. And Ren hugged the cat close to his chest and closed his eyes and let himself slip away.
Haru
Ren?
I understand completely if you don't wish to speak to me, but I wanted to apologize for earlier.
I feel as though I acted far worse to you than you deserve. For that I am very truly sorry.
Ren
You don't need to apologize, it's okay
You've got good reason to be upset
I don't blame you for that, and I don't take it personally
Haru
It still wasn't fair of me to take it out on you like that. >︿<
I really am grateful that you told me the truth, especially because it was difficult for you.
I wish I could have handled it more gracefully.
I suppose I'm no less fallible than you? ¯\_(ツ)_/¯
Ren
Haha, ouch
Haru
That was a low blow, I'm sorry.
Ren
Somehow I don't think you really are
Haru
Almost got away with it, too. (✿◠‿◠)
Ren
Haha
Are we good?
Haru
Of course!
Ren
No sorry that's a dumb way of saying it never mind
Oh
Cool
I'm glad
I want things to be good between us
Haru
I want that too.
And I'm not angry at you, I want to be clear.
What came up on the roof was my own emotion, and I shouldn't have made you feel responsible for it.
It's something I should, and will, address more privately in future.
I won't make you deal with that again.
Ren
I mean, I don't mind helping you deal with it
You're my friend
I'm here for you, and I want to be here for you
Even if it's just to listen, I'm here
Haru
Once again, you're very kind.
Thank you. (__)
Ren
And I mean, even if you don't wanna talk to me about it, you should talk to someone
Like you're close with Makoto, right? You could talk to her
Haru
I'm not sure I wish to bring this particular subject to Makie, but thank you.
That's quite good advice.
Ren
Ann's a good listener too
I mean she's a mean listener sometimes, but she's really fucking good at it haha
Haru
Good to know! (≧▽≦)
I still feel so bad about kicking you off the rooftop. ( ̄﹏ ̄;)
I'm very, very sorry.
Ren
Yeah it was a really long fall
Haru
I'm serious! (`▭´)ノ
Ren
Haha sorry
Apology accepted, I guess?
But honestly I still blame myself more than you
Haru
Somehow, I'm not surprised that you would. (  ̄^ ̄)
Please, attempt to be a little nicer to yourself.
Ren
I'll try
No promises though
I know me, and I can be a real jerk sometimes
Haru
I will have to take your word on that.
Regardless, would you let me make it up to you, for ruining a nice time spent together?
I know you live in a cafe, but perhaps I could treat you to coffee at one of my favorites.
Ren
There's nothing you need to make up for, you didn't ruin anything
But that sounds really nice
Not sure if Sojiro would let me though
Haru
You can always tell him you're stealing a competitor's secrets. (✿◠‿◠)
Ren
Haha, alright
Sure, I'd love to
9/29 – Thursday
After School
The Velvet Room, Lockdown
Ren couldn't afford to drag his feet. Justine would restore his stamina if he fell, but that had a diminishing return. The more times he threw himself at this, the less fight he'd have in him for the next attempt. His first shot would be his best by far. Luckily, he felt bitter and tired and empty, and he was itching for a distraction. Those were poor qualities for a leader, or for a team player. For someone on their own throwing themselves fully into a desperate fight? He could think of no better ones.
"Sorry," he said, offering a little smile to the twins. "I can't afford to pull my punches today. Don't feel bad if you need to call it quits early."
Caroline scoffed. "You've got some guts, Inmate. Or you're just an idiot." She smacked her baton into her hand, sparks discharging into a resonant flash from the impact. "You haven't even gotten close to beating us, you don't get to act cocky yet."
"I could say the same to you, Caroline," Justine chastised. "While he may not be strong enough, the Inmate is still the recipient of our master's power. Do not underestimate him."
"I wasn't gonna!" her sister replied, stomping a foot in indignation. "We're just gonna beat him like always, right?"
"Don't hold back either," Ren said. He didn't know where the words came from. Maybe they weren't even his. Like Anachronism's breath lingering in his lungs. "I want you to give me your full strength. I want to beat you at your best." Slowly, purposefully, he drew his knife. Sure enough, both yellow eyes flicked towards the blade. Their focus would be on that, on his right hand, and not on the skill card he adjusted in his left sleeve. A little misdirection went a long way, after all. He'd have to thank Morgana later for that tidbit of advice.
"Naturally. It would not do for us to lose." But Justine seemed almost hesitant, confused. Wary. Her gaze slowly moved from his blade to his offhand.
Jig was up. No time left to waste. "Thoth!" Left hand up, ripping the mask from his face. The last time they were in Mementos, Ann had attempted to show Ren how to channel the same blue fire she called upon in desperate occasions. This wasn't quite the same, but he was looking for every ounce of firepower he could get his hands on, and applying the same theory to a similar technique should serve the purpose.
The twin's reactions were immediate. "Persona." "Persona!" Their eyepatches burst. A blow across Ren's arm, three quick bolts through his chest. He grit his teeth, focused through the pain, let the rippling flow of arcane mastery flutter its way through his veins, setting fire to his bones, tearing away distraction. He smelled something sweet, earthy, maybe flowers, and then it was gone. Then everything was gone. Everything but him and them. Everything but the plan.
Time to see if Yusuke's newest skill card was everything he'd said it'd be. He could only hope the young man would see this as a worthy enough purpose for destroying his art. Ren flicked it out of his sleeve. "Arsene." The cardboard splintered in his grasp, the chain in his chest growing taut. A roaring hunger like a thousand-mile wave about to crash. A flickering radiance sparking across the battlefield, drawing two surprised gazes up towards the brilliance now manifesting above their heads. A shriek of talons across the sky, two black wings spread wide. "Descend: Morning Star!" And Sirius dropped from the heavens.
It wasn't light that hit Ren like a wave, that sucked every ounce of stamina from his bones. It was the scream of a dying sun, grief gone supernova. Not radiance, but plasma agony.
And then he breathed. Sunspots still flit about his pupils, but his mask had formed back on his face. He couldn't see Caroline or Justine clearly, but they weren't attacking, probably just as stunned as he was. With a shuddering hand, he desperately grabbed into his bag for Oda's Treasure. Futaba had identified it as a healing item, and he was in very dire need of that. He prayed it would do the trick, and slammed back the odd bottle of pink fluid.
Ren had expected cough syrup. It tasted of milk, and bananas, and something almost savory. And he nearly choked on it when his buzzing nerves bolted from dull fatigue into crystal clarity. Like a shot of caffeine straight into his heart, everything peeled away. It was morning again, and he had never been more awake in his fucking life.
"What kind of..." Caroline spluttered, shaking her head, squinting at him. Okay. No time to stop and smell the coffee. He had a fight to win.
It would have been easiest to simply call Arsene once more, but Ren swallowed that instinct. Straining that power on petty blows would get him nowhere fast. Kasumi had been quite assertive towards that fact. Reserve strength, strike carefully, balance power with control. Keep a steady pace, and save his energy for when it's most needed. Right now, that power would do him better on the back burner.
Thankfully, the gentleman thief wasn't his only powerful Persona. The twins had noted before how his bond with the Arcana of the Chariot seemed unnaturally strong – he still had no idea what that actually meant – and he'd bribed his way up to a Persona apparently beyond his normal ability to control. Fusing above his weight level didn't come cheap, but altogether? It barely put a dent in the four million yen from the parcels. If his inclination towards horses, or whatever, helped him put the reins on the beast now slumbering in his heart, so be it.
"Awaken, Cerberus!" The chain anchored in his chest barely moved. But his mask shattered with enough force to drag a pained gasp from his lungs, whirling his heart into furious forms, fire and darkness and fangs tinged with oblivion ichor. And it manifested. White fur, three heads gnashing flaming mouths. The spitting image of those beasts that had guarded Kaneshiro's Palace. It was hungry, eager. But Ren knew hunger. And he knew chariots, or something. "Let's–"
But Justine was quicker. "Diamond Dust." His blood went cold. No, not just his blood. Everything went cold. He could neither see nor breathe nor move, a frigid spark settling around his heart. His vision went white. His heart stopped beating.
"You saved my life. Like, you keep saving my life. If that makes any sense? I dunno what I want to do with my life except follow you, watch you fight and win and everything. You make me want to keep fighting."
Something bloomed, like the steady flame of a lighter. Pushing up and through him and out through his eyes and his mouth and he could see and breathe and Justine looked genuinely aghast and Cerberus merely shook the frost out of its fur with an echoed growl. Oh. Okay. When they'd said 'strong Persona,' that's what they meant.
Ren forced a breath. "How about we pay 'em back in kind, huh boys?" He wasn't sure if the resulting snort from the feline's mouths were approval or disdain. Regardless, they turned their attention towards the mutual foes. Mouths open, embers shuddering through the air. And they breathed out flame, a steady bursting jet that sent a heatwave through the entirety of Lockdown, three flamethrowers turned up to maximum. He held it, letting the triple-headed lion pull from his reserves, letting his strength dwindle. It was worth it. He just had to wait, bide his time until–
"Pixie!" came the frantic cry from within the roiling inferno.
There! Ren yanked back on the leash as hard as he could, forcing the flames to ebb, shoving Cerberus back into his heart. The effort felt like a two-ton slap to the chest, but adrenaline dulled the pain. He'd missed his cue once before, and he couldn't afford to let the moment pass again. Both hands wrapped around the handle of his blade, and he rushed forward, closing the gap, feet pounding on the cinder-blue floor. The smoke bit at his eyes, but he kept them open, kept them focused.
Caroline's eyepatch was gone, her good eye closed, focusing on the single spell that would undo every ounce of Ren's effort. Justine wasn't nearly as indisposed, and her eye flicked towards the advance. Her lips pulled back into a vicious expression that would have fit her sister far more than her. "Ardha!"
"Arsene!" The clash slammed through Ren like a meteor, dragging his pace to a standstill, his teeth gritting at the effort. A single blade drawn against three fists. Two strengths of equal absurdity, one unstoppable and the other unmovable, and he was stuck in the middle. Something had to give. And he wouldn't let it be him.
The whim barely crossed his mind before Arsene complied. "That's...enough!" He slammed his talons into the blade, swiping them across the barely held-back blow. A nullification, sharpened into a razor's edge. And he shoved it into the foe's hands, with a sound like the crack of a shotgun. Not meant to harm, but to disorient, to knock off-balance.
Arsene flickered out of existence. Justine stumbled backwards, Ardha vanishing into her eyepatch. Caroline's eye shot open, her incantation disrupted. Better than Ren had even planned. Gloating could come later, though. His left hand snapped up to his mask.
Makoto had done nothing if not impart the worth of debilitating foes before striking, preventing them from striking while opening up their weaknesses. It was still difficult to adjust to less straightforward strategies, but a true Trickster couldn't slack on his options. Besides, one good trick deserved another. Kaiwan's mask settled on Ren's face, just in time for him to tear it off. "Makajama!" An azure strain, like twine pulled taught. A flapping wing knocked into stasis.
Justine blinked. She opened her mouth, and no words left her. She knew, she must have known. It wouldn't be long before she could undo that magic. But it was time enough to pull the curtains closed, and Ren spun towards his remaining foe–
"How do you do it?" the Trickster asked. "How do you kill?"
"I expect that's not idle curiosity," the boy in the red mask replied, wiping the Shadow dust from his blade. "You've yet to give me your answer, you know."
"Give me yours first," he fired back.
The boy rolled his eyes. "Yes, yes, very well. I suppose I owe you a free consultation on the techniques behind murder, now that I've agreed to our joint venture."
The Trickster's eye twitched. "Bite me."
The boy in the red mask reached up as if to adjust a tie, or perhaps a cape, and found it absent. He lowered his hand again. "It isn't too difficult to end a life," he said, his tone unnaturally calm, practiced. Like reading a TV script. "One only needs to construct the illusion, or emphasize the reality, of something far more drastic being taken should that life be spared." Two brown-near-crimson eyes, one a slightly darker shade than the other, both locked on the Trickster. "I expect you can extrapolate enough from there."
"Probably," the Trickster said. "If some self-important shitheel can figure it out, what's stopping me–"
Ren caught his hand, locked the joints in place. The blade of his knife was horizontal, parallel to Caroline's throat. Less than a foot away, catching the reflection of her wide yellow eye in the polished metal. Close enough to cut the tension, but nothing else.
No one made a sound. No one moved an inch.
"That's checkmate," Ren said, finally. And he lowered the knife. Just in case, he turned his attention back to Justine. "Patra." Clotho's steady hand pulled back the veil.
"You won," she said. Still, almost confused, like it hadn't sunk in yet. "You beat us."
"That's not possible," Caroline spluttered. "He wasn't anywhere near this strong last time, how did...that's not fair!"
"Sorry," he said. "And, thanks." At their confused glances, he smiled. "You didn't hold back. I'm grateful." Ren's knees felt like buckling. This was an awful distraction, and probably a very bad decision.
"We owe you now what was promised." Justine turned her attention towards the clipboard Compendium, idly flipping through the pages.
"Right." Caroline grimaced. "We've gotta answer your questions." Like she was bracing for his worst.
Ren was of the firm opinion he'd done enough harm already. "I'll pass for now," he said, trying to keep his tone light, keep the dread and exhaustion from setting in. "I'll take you up on that sometime though. Just...not today." He slipped Anachronism's blade back into its sheath. It was his blade, wasn't it? Ren's former, future self. That must have been why it fit so comfortably in his hand. That must have been why he had found it so easy to use. That must have been why it felt so bitter against his palm.
Biggest thanks in the whole world to my wonderful brainstorm buddy Jane for beta reading this chapter!
