Chapter Ten

Distance

Hanabi – 18-19
Konohamaru – 20-21


When she first saw Konohamaru, nearly two months later, they had averted eyes.

That hurt, but it was her own fault, anyway. She pushed him away. Like always.

"Hello, Konohamaru!" Jun called brightly with a wave and Hanabi cursed him under her breath.

"Hey!" Eiji snatched Jun's elbow, yanking him in front of her just as Konohamaru reluctantly waved back and hurried off. "We're not talking to him, remember?!"

"You ladies aren't talking to him," he corrected with a raised eyebrow. "I do not participate in village drama. Konohamaru is still my friend."

"Yeah, well—"

"He's right," Hanabi interjected tautly before sighing, slumping her shoulders. "You guys shouldn't be avoiding him because of me. He's your friend…"

Jun offered a sad smile while Eiji lowered her eyes, folding her arms. "Yeah, right. I could care less about him."

"That is…unnecessarily cruel, Eiji." Jun frowned, looking disapprovingly at their teammate.

"What? It's true." She shrugged, rolling her eyes. "He was always annoying anyway. Glad I have an excuse to give him the stink eye."

"Please don't," Hanabi muttered, turning her head from her team. "Whatever's going on with us doesn't concern you guys. Honestly, I probably shouldn't have even told you…"

"Pfft," Eiji huffed, waving her away, "you can't keep things from me even if you tried. Better just to be out with it anyhow. But fine, I'll respect your wishes and junk."

"Have you tried talking with him, Hanabi?" Jun asked sincerely and she shook her head. "Perhaps—"

"Thanks, Jun, but no," she interjected, crossing her arms over her stomach as she looked back up at him with sincerity in her eyes. "It's different this time. I can't just talk to him. And honestly…it's better this way."

"Disagree," Eiji snapped, causing both to look at her curiously, "you're all mopey whenever you see him or hear about him. It's annoying!" Hanabi leaned back from her as if she was taking a shot at her. "It's true! I like happy Hanabi. Sad Hanabi always comes around when something's going on with lover boy."

"Don't call him that!" Hanabi snapped, glaring.

She suddenly realized she might be feeling the same way Hinata would feel when she teased her about Naruto.

Perhaps she deserved this.

"ANYWAY," Eiji sighed dramatically, tugging on both her teammate's elbows, "let's go! We're gonna be late for the movie!"

"It's just previews for another 20 minutes."

"Best part, now come on!"


The second time she saw him, it was an awkward clash as she burst into her sister's home just as he was leaving.

"Sorry! Hanabi—"

"It's fine."

They locked eyes and stayed like that for a few seconds too long. She didn't miss the red on his cheeks as she glared at him, and when she felt that familiar heat rising in her own, she turned tail.

She had come to her sisters to vent about the latest haughty politicians that had said something to tick her off, but it seemed that wouldn't be happening today. How ridiculous she would look if she turned right back around and possibly passed him again on her shameful walk back.

She couldn't help but think about how sad he looked at her glaring. How dare he make her feel bad.

How tired she was of her world revolving around Konohamaru.

As she passed the dango shop they had eaten at together a few years ago after he'd lost a bet, she growled in frustration.

"Pay up, Sarutobi!"

"I thought for sure your sister was gonna propose…" Konohamaru grumbled irritably as he dug into his coin pouch.

"Ha! I told you, she'd never be the one to make that kind of move first," Hanabi snickered, wagging her finger in his face as he recoiled.

"Yeah, yeah." He waved away her finger as he took the two plates of dango from the owner. She gasped in surprise when he stuffed one of the sticks of dango into her mouth and he laughed. "Enjoy your dango, princess!"

"Do—" she sputtered, biting down to yank the dango off the stick before chasing after him. "Don't call me that!"

The ramen shop. The academy. The lake. These damn kunai she continued to carry with her wherever she went despite it all.

Everything brought her back to him and she was just so sick of it.

Eiji had foolishly tried to set her up on a date with one of her cousins in that damn dango shop.

The man was abrasive and loud and smelled of dog. Or maybe it was the dog that smelled of dog. But when he pulled her in for a rough hug at the end of the date and an attempt at a kiss, she realized—no, he did indeed reek of dog. He reminded her too much of Kiba. She did like her sister's teammate fine, but he was certainly not her cup of tea. If Eiji can manage to smell like a normal human, why couldn't the men of the clan?!

As politely as she could muster, she had asked Eiji to never dare to do such a thing again.

Still, she couldn't help but feel like she was being pitiful. Perhaps years of being courted had made her numb to it all…all of it except when it came from him. Because when it came from him, it was pure and genuine. He didn't treat her like a lady. He didn't treat her like the heiress, not like some precious jewel to be collected, not like a step in a quest for power and prestige. He treated her like Hanabi, the Hanabi she had revealed herself to be with him. The one who could fight alongside him, laugh with him, bare her soul to him. In the end, it always came back to that need for him.

Just like always, she convinced herself it was a silly fantasy. If she didn't know any better, she'd think those stupid stories of princesses and heroes were getting to her head.

How she wished she could just…

Soon, she found herself kneeling in one of the quieter parts of the Hyūga compound, a memorial site of sorts, where deceased Hyūga were honored and remembered. Before her was a memorial to her mother, various items and pictures laid before her. In the middle, a framed image of her mother and father posing with a little Hinata in between, and Hanabi cradled in her mother's arms. Next to it, a display of pressed flowers, and on the other side, a treasured kunai.

It was the reason she trained in kunai, was her mother. She never knew her, and Hinata had picked up her hobby of pressing flowers, lucky enough to learn it directly from the woman. Training in kunai was the only other way she could even attempt to connect with her. As she grew older, she began to resent it. Resent that training in weaponry was the only way to feel some sort of bond. She felt foolish for it, and at one point, nearly dumped all of her kunai in a lake in a fit of frustration after arguing with her father.

But when she opened her satchel and that obsidian kunai glimmered, she stopped. And she closed it back up.

Now, nearing 19, she would never dream of giving up that little thread of connection. With her. With Konohamaru.

She reached over to the kunai and brushed her fingertips against it. She'd never dare to pick it up from its final resting place. She chose to simply admire it, feel it's smooth edges. A simple, silver kunai. As told to her, her mother's very first kunai. Standard for any shinobi, but apparently of great importance to her. She'd heard great stories of her mother—that she had the farthest-reaching byakugan of the main house, she was an expert healer and warrior in battle, and she was 'a joy to be around' as so many had told her.

So how had her mother fallen in love with someone like her father? How had her mother bared it all as the wife of the clan head? How had her mother decided to have a second child, knowing what the consequences of such a thing could be in their clan?

How could her mother, as kind as Hinata had described her, have allowed this? Stood by and let the Hyūga be this way? Let her father sacrifice his own brother? Brand his own nephew? Thrust his will upon his daughters, to force them to be heirs of an unjust regime? One that could never let them have any sort of free will?

One that would strip Hanabi of any freedom of choice the moment she was born?

One that would never allow her happiness.

As she retracted her hand, a relentless stabbing pain hit her heart and she doubled over, clutching her chest.

And the tears came.

How was she supposed to do this alone?

"How am I…" she sobbed out, hand shooting to the floor to keep herself up. Drops of tears stained her hands as she heaved deep breaths. "Mother…why did you leave?"

For several minutes, she simply glared at the floor, letting the tears flow onto the floor without care. Sad, but angry tears. Sad because all she wanted was her mother. That kind woman that hummed sweet songs and gardened with her daughter and tended to the wounded and apparently always knew the exact thing to say to cheer anyone up. All she wanted was that comfort that Hinata had as a girl. Angry because she wasn't here, and she never would be, not now and not in her memories, either.

"Why did I come here…" she choked out, her frantic episode slowly winding down as she looked back up at that picture. That picture of her 'happy' family. The overwhelming need to reach up and slam it down almost took hold, but she grabbed her hands together and pulled them to her chest. She glared at the photo and found she no longer felt comfort in it. Years and years spent trying to reach out, to get a response, to get some sort of guidance, and still, nothing.

"You died and left me here," she whispered, swallowing harshly with furrowed eyebrows. "And you can't even hear me, anything I'm saying. So what am I doing here?"

She paused, wishing nothing more than to hear something back. Anything.

Nothing came, and she dragged herself back to her feet.

Speaking to the dead was worthless, which is why she hadn't been here in years. It was why she knew she wouldn't be back for a long, long time.

The third time she saw him, he hadn't seen her.

But she had certainly seen him and…her.

When she saw him with his arm slung over a girl from their academy days, she hadn't thought much of it at first. She assumed they were just missioning together, either returning or setting out. Konohamaru had always been a little touchy with others, it was just in his nature. He was a likable guy, people naturally gravitated toward him. So when he pulled her in for a hug, Hanabi just figured it was classic Konohamaru, physically friendly. Sure, a subtle sense of jealousy made her fingers tingle, but she continued to observe.

Then they parted and he…kissed her.

An involuntary gasp left her at the sight, and she ducked when she saw his head begin to turn.

Kiss?

A girl?

Another…girl?

It was on the lips. It wasn't a friendly kiss. It was a romantic one.

Those lips she had spent the past five years getting to know, agonizingly slowly in their silly game. Making contact with a pair of lips that did not belong to her.

How silly it was of her to expect him not to move on from whatever this…stupid, messed up thing it was that they had.

And something inside of Hanabi tore at the sight.

That's when she realized it really was just a fantasy—to think anything could ever come of them, together. Why would he wait for her? What was she expecting? That he'd dutifully sit by until the slight possibility of being an item were to arise? Be by himself, forever, possibly? No, of course not. Something in Hanabi selfishly hoped that he would, that maybe he'd fight for them. But what was there to fight for? They were never a couple in the first place. All they had shared were some clumsy, silly kisses as teenagers, hardly enough to call it true romance.

No. Her father used to tell she and Hinata that a girl in love was a fool. And she definitely felt like a fool.

She remained locked behind a stall in the streets, hugging her knees as she flicked on her byakugan. His head was still turned towards her position, but she saw his shoulders shrug and his head return to the woman he was with.

"I'll take two fried squids. One for me, and one for my friend down there."

If she had been frozen in place before, she was absolutely petrified now as she heard a familiar voice.

"Here ya go, little lamb."

"Sensei!" she hissed under her breath, frantically checking on Konohamaru's position, only to find that his and the chakra network of the woman he was with had disappeared.

"What? Looked like you needed a distraction."

"I-I—" she stuttered out, deactivating her byakugan and slowly rising to her feet, still glancing around nervously. She must look like a crazed fool. Finally, her eyes landed on the hand offering a fried squid and she sighed through her nose, carefully taking it in her own. "What are you doing here?"

Tora snorted with a smirk, crossing her now free arm over her chest to rest against her elbow. "I am but a humble citizen of the village, enjoying the town. Am I not allowed that?"

"You're a sensei," Hanabi scoffed, tearing into the fried squid with squinted eyes. She continued with a full mouth, "sensei are supposed to be in their offices, burying their noses in paperwork and acting high and mighty."

"And heiresses are supposed to chew with their mouths closed, not act like pigs."

Hanabi let a chuckle leave her despite her tense demeanor. She swallowed her mouthful. "Alright, fine. Seriously, what's up? Why the free squid?"

"Do I have to have an underlying motive?" Tora shrugged, nodding to her side as a sign to follow. Hanabi glanced back at the spot she had spotted Konohamaru and his…whatever she was, before conceding and following. "So what's up with you? Why the vanishing act?"

"I don't know what you mean." Hanabi feigned ignorance, turning her nose up even as her sensei's eyes burned into her skin.

"Not my place to pry," she returned, and Hanabi felt her eyes leave her. "Why don't we catch up a bit? Tell me of all your wonderous adventures since promoting, huh?"

Hanabi sighed softly out of her nose, knowing her sensei knew full well what was up, but instead was trying to distract her. Luckily, it worked. This time.


The third time he saw her, he wasn't entirely sure she realized he had seen her.

And it made his stomach flip.

"What's wrong?"

Feigning ignorance, he shrugged and turned back to the girl he was with. "Ah, nothin'. I'll walk you home, okay?"

As she hooked her arm with his, he attempted to listen to whatever it was she was going on about, but he couldn't get the image of Hanabi's shocked face from his mind. Eyes wide like plates, mouth open, her face already red by the time he spotted her, that little "eep!" that left her as she crashed to the ground. She couldn't possibly have thought she was being sneaky, could she?

Of course, he knew she'd find out sooner or later. He just regretted it had to be like this, but was there even a good way for it to happen? No, not really. But what had she expected of him? She made it clear she wanted nothing to do with him. So why did she hide? He'd seen her with other guys around the village on occasion, he shouldn't feel bad about moving on, right? Moving on from whatever it was they had shared, which he was reminded by Moegi wasn't really anything.

Sometimes he regretted sharing things with his friends.

As they approached the girls home, she slid her hands into his and drew him from his thoughts, unaware that he hadn't heard much of what she had been saying.

"Wanna come inside?" she asked with a sly smile and he strained to give her one back.

"I really should get home, I gotta get up early to train with Naruto…" He pulled a hand from hers to rub at his neck. She sidled up against him, pulling her arms around his neck and he sighed gently, resting his hands on her waist.

"C'mon, tired of me already? Relax a little! It's always work, work, work with you."

Work, work, work. A phrase he'd been hearing more and more often lately, and he had to admit that it was true. He'd been throwing himself into any missions that cropped up, pestering Naruto about going to Mount Myōboku, training himself to exhaustion when there was nothing else to do. Even Moegi, who was normally on his side when it came to throwing himself into work, was trying to tell him to 'relax a little.'

"Not tired of you, no," he placated, tensing under her touch slightly as she pulled him closer.

"Then? Come inside, I'll help you relax." When he hesitated, her eyebrows dipped and a frown emerged. "Konohamaru. I barely see you. What kind of boyfriend neglects their girlfriend like that? Come. Inside."

With a little puff of air as guilt drove him, he nodded, allowing her to draw him inside.

Unfortunately, Hanabi continued to invade his thoughts


The fourth time she saw him, it was in the Hokage's office.

Well damn.

"This one should be rather simple," Kakashi started as Udon settled between a tense Konohamaru and Hanabi, "an old hideout just a day's travel out west. Some chūnin discovered it a few days ago, and reported some important artifacts that could date to the founding of the village. I'd like you to collect what you find appropriate and record what else might be in there."

Hanabi couldn't stop herself from questioning, "does this really require a three-person team, Lord Hokage?" Silence fell as Kakashi raised his eyebrows at her. After a moment of wringing her hands together behind her back while both Udon and Konohamaru peered at her out of the corners of their eyes, she spoke again, "I mean, it just seems like a two-person team could handle it fine. Wouldn't want you to waste resources is all…"

"Do you wish to refuse the mission, Hanabi?" Kakashi asked pointedly and she immediately threw up her hands in front of her in defense.

"Of course not! No, no, no—"

"Wonderful. I expect you three to leave in the morning," he finished, pushing the scroll toward the team. Udon reluctantly stepped forward to pick it up, awkward silence draping over them as they shuffled out.

"Well, when would you guys like to meet?" Udon questioned as he pulled the door closed behind him.

"See you at the front gates at 8," Hanabi replied hurriedly, scurrying off without further communication.

When she returned home, she threw herself on her bed.

For most of her teenage life, she always had a little sliver of hope in the back of her mind when she was called on a mission, that it would include Konohamaru. Of course when she didn't want to be put on a mission with him, she would be. The fates were cruel, and she had no choice but to accept it.

It was a simple mission. She could avoid talking to them as long as she kept in front, they could quickly clear out the hideout, and then move on from this awkward situation. That's what she told herself, anyway.

She was the first to arrive at the gates a little before 8. Within moments, Udon and Konohamaru approached together, and she was already off without so much as a hello. She caught the look they exchanged before they leaped after her.

Udon acted as the intermediary, catching up with her as she continuously scanned with the byakugan. She glanced at him before returning her eyes forward. "Uh—so, I was thinking we could stop every couple of hours to take a break, every two if that sounds alright to you?"

"Are you the team leader?" she grumbled, refusing to meet his gaze. She swallowed, realizing she was projecting her irritation on the wrong person. "I mean—I don't need a break that often. I'd rather just go until someone needs a break, know what I mean?"

"Oh, sure," Udon replied readily. "I'll, uh, leave you alone to focus up here, then."

"Thanks…" she sighed as he slowed his pace to let her outrun him.

She was so tired of feeling guilty.

She stuck to her plan, keeping upfront to avoid any interaction. She knew it was childish, but struggled to snap herself out of it. Her body and mouth were acting on defensive instinct, even if her mind was telling her to reel it in.

They're gonna hate me by the end of this.

When she saw their chakra networks stop behind her after a few hours, she stopped as well and circled back.

"Hydrate," Udon swished his canteen towards her before taking a drink.

Again, out of instinct, she snarked, "can't do that while traveling?"

"We could walk, maybe?" Udon offered, beginning to walk ahead of the two. Hanabi let out an irritated puff before following after him, Konohamaru seemingly expressionless as he joined them. "Just a few more hours; should get there before sundown. You guys think you'll be up to investigating during the night?"

In unison, Konohamaru and Hanabi responded eagerly, "yes."

Udon perked an eyebrow at the two before shrugging. "Sounds good to me."

Hanabi regretted that Konohamaru and Udon were silent as they traveled. They were best friends on a mission together, they should've been able to chat without worry. She knew her presence was forcing silence, so she forced her chin up. "I'm just gonna get ahead a little bit."

As she leaped away, she heard Udon whisper, "man, she's really upset with you, huh?"

Now that she was walking about a kilometer ahead of the pair, she couldn't resist activating her byakugan to see if she could make out what they were saying.

"So how's things with your new girl?" she made out from Udon's lips. "Saw her hanging all over you at the izakaya the other day."

"Good, good."

"Just good? Come on, you don't have to keep things from me. I also saw you going into her apartment—"

Hanabi deactivated the byakugan, feeling sick to her stomach.

Well, that was a mistake.

Udon was correct, they arrived at the site with some sunlight to spare, so Hanabi chose to just dive in as soon as she got there. They were only a few kilometers back. She was greeted with a hideout covered in a thick layer of dust, and it didn't actually look like much on the surface. It looked like an ordinary shack: a table with chairs, a bookcase that was mostly cleared of its contents, barren walls with just a few sconces that were long-forgotten. She activated the byakugan to see if there was anything more, and was greeted with a small tunnel system below with a few rooms. She chose to bypass the initial room and work her way downward.

The first room she entered was a bedroom, and she wondered if they were all bedrooms. The bed was made, albeit covered in more dust, and not much seemed out of the ordinary, except a journal sitting atop the nightstand. That's where she chose to begin, picking it up and blowing the dust from its cover. Carefully, she opened it, unsure of how old and frail it might be. The pages were slowly tearing from its binding, so she took extra care with it.

Upon inspection, it was a journal of some rogue shinobi from before the second war. It was somewhat interesting, detailing plots of revenge and fantasies of bringing down the shinobi system. She summoned a bag and carefully tucked it in, wrapping it gently to ensure the pages remained intact.

Rustling came from behind her and she practically jumped out of her skin, nearly forgetting that Udon and Konohamaru would be joining her shortly. She flipped around, letting out a puff of air as she met eyes with Konohamaru.

"Sorry," he said, quickly, glancing around the room, "just wanted to make sure you made it here…"

"Yep," she huffed, turning away from him, "all good."

"Right…I'll just…" He awkwardly shuffled away and she let out another breath, rolling her eyes at herself.

They spent a few hours diligently going through each room, ensuring they combed through everything they could find and gathering what seemed most important. By the end of it, it was just passed midnight, and they converged in the initial, main room.

"We can rest here for the night then head out at sun up." It was strange to see Udon assuming the leadership role that Konohamaru or even Hanabi would normally take up, but circumstances demanded he keep them in line as a team.

Of course, Hanabi would still interject, "we could make it home by noon tomorrow if we just go now."

"Sorry, Hanabi, I just don't think that's a good idea." Hanabi glared at him and he readjusted his glasses before folding his arms. "One night won't kill you two, alright? We can all play nice for a little while longer."

"Gods…" Hanabi muttered with clenched fists, stomping away irritably down the stairs, ignoring the flinch Konohamaru displayed at her anger.

She settled in one of the rooms, choosing to summon a sleeping pad instead of trying to sleep on one of the dust-covered beds. She could faintly hear Konohamaru and Udon chatting above her and she let out a grunt of annoyance. Sleep would never come to her like this, so before she laid down on the pad, she chose to do another sweep of the room. If she wasn't going to sleep, she might as well busy her mind with being thorough.

Double-checking each of the drawers and cabinets, she found nothing. Restless, she began pacing back and forth in the room, trying to occupy her thoughts with other things, when she noticed a particular spot within the room felt different from the others—a little springier. Slowly, she lowered to her knees and wiped at the floor before pressing her ear to it. She quietly knocked on the spot, finding it to sound hollow. She tested other areas of the room, all of which gave muted sounds compared to that spot, and she activated the byakugan.

It didn't look out of the ordinary, but something told her to investigate further. She pulled a kunai from her pouch and carefully slid it between the planks of wood and began leveraging it up. Once it gave, it popped up with little resistance, revealing a safe with a seal on it. A seal that shouldn't be there—one that masks things from the byakugan. She swallowed as she stared at it, eye twitching slightly. Only Hyūga should know how to create this seal, and only the highest ranking Hyūga. Couldn't be good.

With a shaky hand, she reached down to tug the safe out. It was surprisingly light. Quietly, she released the seal and watched it peel back, allowing the contents to be accessed. But it was an old school lock, not sealed with chakra, but with a simple turn-style. She let out a little sigh of frustration, debating whether she wanted to try to smash it open or otherwise right now.

Udon's good with this kind of stuff…I remember he took up lock picking as a hobby…

With another irritated breath, she pulled the safe up to her eyes. Did she want to brave it up there to see if they could help? Who knew what was in there, it clearly had to do with the Hyūga to some degree if it was specifically hidden from the byakugan. Should she just pack it away and bring it to the Hokage? Or perhaps her father, or the council? She wasn't sure any of those were the right move.

"Fine…" she whispered to herself, getting to her feet. She strained her ear to see if she could still hear them, and indeed she could, still chatting away. With effort, she forced herself up the stairs, and their conversation came to a halt as they heard her footsteps. She stopped in the doorway, looking directly at Udon as the two met her gaze. "Found something else…"

"Yeah?" Udon asked curiously, glancing at the safe in her hands. "Well…you could just pack it away, right?"

She shook her head, taking a little shuddered breath. "Not this one…I want to open it. Now."

They both raised their eyebrows and exchanged a brief look before Udon waved her over. She approached and kneeled in front of him, turning the locking mechanism towards him for his observation. He took it in his hands and took a few moments to inspect it. "Where'd you find this?"

"It was…under the floorboards, in the room I was in."

"Didn't pick it up with your byakugan the first time?"

She paused, debating whether she wanted to reveal the seal. She shook her head again. "Must've missed it. It happens…"

"Right." He nodded, giving the lock a few experimental turns as he focused his attention on it. "It's a pretty simple lock…whoever hid this didn't seem to care too much about security, I guess."

She held back the need to reveal the whole truth, pursing her lips.

As Udon pressed his ear to the side of the safe while turning the lock, she dared to peer out the corner of her eye at Konohamaru. He was focused on watching Udon and she followed suit, fingers clasping together in a tight hold. They watched curiously as he worked, neither fully understanding his methods but knowing he was best suited for it.

After a few minutes, they heard a 'click' and the safe popped open. Hanabi nearly launched into Udon to snatch it back, causing him to fall backward. "Sorry! Thank you!"

She scurried downstairs before she could see their reactions, feeling her entire body consumed in heat. Oh, how mad she must look.

She set the safe down then sat lotus in front of it, slowly opening the door. The contents were…underwhelming. It was yet another journal of some sort.

With a sigh, she pulled it out and examined the cover. It was blank. She peeled it open to the first page and was met with a rudimentary sketch of the byakugan. She squinted at it for a moment before turning the page again.

'With the impending death of Hashirama Senju, here begins our work in sealing the byakugan.'

She swallowed, frowning down at the page. Was this…?

It took her a few hours to read through the entirety of the journal, and by the end of it, she wished she hadn't.

The journal detailed the journey whoever wrote this went on to inventing the caged bird seal, with sketches to boot. Whoever wrote this must have been a Hyūga themselves. Despite the literary nature of the book, there was deep resentment in the words written. Little snippets of the past, about Hyūga who left the Leaf to pursue other ventures, Hyūga whose byakugan were considered weak and undeserving of holding the name, Hyūga who were actively planning on separating out the entire clan into main and branch families.

Her entire life, she had been told that this was how the Hyūga had always been. 'Always been,' she realized, could be subjective.

Who was this person? Were they related to her? Were they the clan leader during the time this was written? If so, it was very possible this could have been a great-grandparent, or close enough.

The worst part was, this person was experimenting on Hyūga as they perfected the seal. She had to assume at least some of them were killed in the experimentation and suddenly, she felt nauseous.

Truthfully, she was just glad Udon and Konohamaru hadn't come down to demand information.

She leaned up against the edge of the bed as she laid the journal down next to her, resting her head back as she closed her eyes. She bunched her fists in her lap, her throat feeling tight as she repressed a scream of pure frustration.

Why did she have to discover this?! Now she had to carry this knowledge around with her! There was no way she could bring this to anyone's attention! Kakashi had already made it clear he had no control over the Hyūga, the council would probably order the book be burned, and her father…she couldn't even guess how he'd react. He was always so emotionless when it came to these things, she was never sure how he truly felt about any of it. If she had to guess, she'd assume she'd just order her to keep quiet about it and dispose of the journal.

Besides, what good would it do to try to tell anyone about it, anyway? What's done is done…whoever this person was, they got their wish. The Hyūga had been separated for nearly a century, now, and the branch family had all been sealed for just as long.

Just another thing for her to carry to her grave. First Shizuka, now this. All she could do was hope she'd stop stumbling into these revelations about her clan. Now she wondered if Hinata had ever made any discoveries when she was on active duty, too. If she had, Hanabi had been none the wiser.

She didn't sleep that night, left alone with her thoughts. She deeply wished she could just go upstairs and join Udon and Konohamaru, distract her from it all. But she dug her own grave, now she would lie in it.

Once the sun started peeking through the door from upstairs, she climbed to her feet and packed away the safe with the journal in it. When she got to the top of the stairs, she was irritated to find them both slumbering away, and impatiently stomped her foot to rouse them. Both shot up at the sound and vibration, looking panicked as they searched the room. Simultaneously, they both relaxed upon seeing Hanabi, though Udon quickly replaced it with a sour look.

"Could be a little gentler, Hanabi," he muttered, reaching up to rub his eyes before bending to pick up his glasses.

Konohamaru stretched out his arms, bending backward as he let out a loud yawn. One hand reached up to rub at his eye and the other scratched at the stubble on his chin. He looked down to straighten out his flak jacket, then glanced up at Hanabi, a little pink dusting his cheeks because—

Oh damnit, I'm staring!

Quickly, she flipped around so her back would face them, curtaining her face to make good and sure they wouldn't see her own blush. She cleared her throat. "We stayed the night like you wanted. Can we go now?"

"Yeah, sure," Udon's tired voice replied.

As soon as she felt the flush on her face cool off, she took a deep breath and turned back around, heading for the front door as the other two strapped their packs to their bodies. Without consulting them, she started to head toward the village.

"Hey! Wait up!"

She let out a tiny grumble of irritation as she skidded to a stop, looking over her shoulder to find them leaping after her. "What?"

"Well—you have that safe, still?" Udon asked, suspiciously. Slowly, she nodded. "What was in it?"

"Junk."

"I find that hard to believe." Udon squinted at her, cupping his chin. "Regardless, you do know it has to be turned over to Kakashi, right?"

"Yeah, of course."

Of course, she knew that. Didn't mean she was going to.

"Hanabi." Her eye twitched at her name spoken by Konohamaru. She pursed her lips, not facing him. "You're going to give it to Kakashi, right?"

"Jeeze!" She threw her hands up and rolled her eyes. "Give me some credit!"

"That's not an answer," he pressed, stepping towards her. Finally, she looked up at him with the angriest glare she could muster.

"What do you want from me?" she snapped.

"To tell us you're going to give it up," Udon joined in, tilting his head down at her. She stepped back from them.

"O-of course I will," she replied, crinkling her nose briefly. Konohamaru's eyes lowered and she spoke through gritted teeth, "what?"

"You do that—" He pointed at her nose. "—when you're being dishonest."

"Do what?!"

"Scrunch up your nose," he replied, simply.

How did he know her so well? When had he ever paid attention to that? "I do not. I'm not being dishonest. I'll give it to him." She caught the urge for her nose to crinkle once more.

"I'll hold you to it," Udon finished the conversation. "Let's get going."

Hanabi's mind raced as they traveled back to the village.

Damn them! Damn him!

How long had she been doing that? She hadn't even realized, no one had pointed it out before. Gods, how often did people know when she was lying to them? How had she been so obvious? She was a Hyūga! What a silly thing to get caught over.

Now she had to figure out how to keep this damn journal for herself.

She slowed her pace enough for them to catch up to her. Once they were in earshot, she yelled out, "I have to pee!"

Both stopped at her call and she scurried off as far as she could reasonably go without raising suspicion. She drew the safe out of her pack and yanked the journal out, quickly putting it into her medical satchel, then fished around her belonging for something that could go in its place. She didn't want to give up any of her kunai…nothing could go in there that looked too modern. Then she thought of the journal she found in the first place and hurriedly pulled it from her pack to put in the safe. She slammed it shut and shoved it back in before taking off the rejoin them.

Upon returning, they didn't look any the wiser, so they continued their journey back just as they came: Hanabi kilometers up front while Udon and Konohamaru trailed behind.

Once they returned to the village and gave their report, Hanabi chose a quiet place on the second floor of the tower to fill out her report away from others.

Briefly, she trailed her fingers over her medical satchel, thinking of the journal. She had gotten away with it, at least.

Or at least, she thought she had.


The fourth time he saw her, she was entering the Hokage's office and froze in the doorway. His lips dipped to a frown as he looked at her, quickly shifting his eyes forward.

He could do this. He could act professionally, go complete a mission with her, someone who…hated him.

It didn't surprise him that she chose to distance herself for the duration of their travel. Even though it wasn't him who pushed her away, he still felt a little bad for her. A mission with him and one of his best friends must have been the last thing she wanted. At least he could busy himself chatting with his friend, she had to bear through it all. As much as he wanted to just not care and tell himself that she did this to herself, he couldn't help but feel guilty. So he gave her space, even when Udon prodded him about it.

"Is it really a good idea just to let her get so far ahead?" Udon asked at around the quarter mark of their journey after catching up with her to check in, and Konohamaru shrugged.

"She knows what she's doing…she can handle herself."

And that was that, thankfully. Udon moved into more comfortable topics afterward.

"So how long will you be gone this time?" Udon asked him about his trip to Mount Myōboku.

"Maybe a month? I'm not sure, it kind of depends on the progress," he said as he cupped his chin briefly, looking upwards. "I've been able to summon toads for a while, but Naruto's been iffy about sage mode. I'm kind of tired of pushing it, I've been thinking about going through grandpa's old journals about monkey sage mode…"

"Yeah?" Udon questioned.

"I mean, if Naruto could learn toad sage mode on his own, I should be able to learn my own grandfather's sage mode, right?" He regretted the doubt in his own voice.

"Yeah, for sure!" Udon's enthusiasm was welcome and Konohamaru nodded. A brief pause before he continued, "but you should take a little break, maybe? We barely see you outside of missions, man."

"Ah…" Konohamaru pursed his lips, thinking over his words before looking up at Udon with a big, forced smile. "Why take a break when we're in the prime of our youth like Gai-sensei would say?"

Udon chuckled, nodding. "Yeah, right. Speaking of breaks, we should stop for a bit."

"Sure." Konohamaru nodded, slowing his pace next to him until they came to a stop.

"Should we catch up to let her know?"

"Nah, she'll know."

On cue, she appeared in their line of sight, leaping back to them with expectantly raised eyebrows. Udon smirked as he lifted his canteen, swishing it around. "Hydrate."

"Can't do that while traveling?"

Konohamaru steeled his gaze ahead, refusing to let her know her attitude was bothering him. He had to remain outwardly unaffected or else he might let himself slip and start something he didn't want to start. Not here, anyway.

"We could walk, maybe?" Udon offered, beginning to walk ahead of the two. Konohamaru averted his eyes as Hanabi let out an irritated sigh, picking up the pace ahead of them. "Just a few more hours; should get there before sundown. You guys think you'll be up to investigating during the night?"

In unison, Konohamaru and Hanabi responded eagerly, "yes."

He knew Udon was just trying to mediate between them. "Sounds good to me."

For the next few minutes, all was silent. He didn't feel comfortable trying to have a normal conversation with her around, and Udon seemed to feel the same way. Then she cleared her throat and piped up, "I'm just gonna get ahead a little bit."

As she leaped away, Udon whispered, "man, she's really upset with you, huh?"

Konohamaru gritted his teeth as he watched her disappear ahead of them before pulling his canteen to his lips to stall his answer. As he let out a little 'aah' after swallowing, he looked to his side, avoiding Udon's stare. "I guess so. I don't really wanna talk about it."

"Then let's talk about other things. So, how're things with your new girl?" he asked, wiggling his eyebrows slightly. "Saw her hanging all over you at the izakaya the other day."

"Good, good." His head shook from side to side as he spoke, contradicting his own words.

"Just good? Come on, you don't have to keep things from me. I also saw you going into her apartment—"

"What are you, spying on me?!" he snapped uncharacteristically, glaring at his friend. Udon chuckled with a shrug and Konohamaru rolled his eyes. "Let's just be quiet for a while, alright?"

"Remind me to never accept a mission with you two on it again."

His mind flashed to the day he'd let her drag him into her apartment. Admittedly, he had fun, but something about it being right after Hanabi spotted them made him feel incredibly guilty. And he kind of hated it, if he had to be honest. It was almost like what he imagined a cheating partner might feel, caught in the act, but he wasn't a cheating partner! He was his own man, doing his own things, outside of the scope of Hanabi, and that should be okay, right?

He shook the thought away, trying to resume normal conversation with Udon, thankfully onto other topics. Time dragged on more slowly than he would have liked, but they eventually made it to the hideout with daylight left, and he figured Hanabi was already inside. Upon entering the hidden space, they both stopped to stretch briefly, Udon piping up, "doesn't look like much, huh?"

Konohamaru glanced around. It didn't, but he saw a door on the floor propped open and figured that's where all the 'treasure' probably was, along with Hanabi. He jogged over to it and pulled it open, finding stairs down to what looked like a dark hallway. He fished a flashlight from his satchel and descended, carefully pushing open several doors to check inside until he came upon Hanabi. He raised his hands defensively when she jumped at the sound of him.

"Sorry," he said, quickly, glancing around the room, "just wanted to make sure you made it here…"

"Yep," she huffed, turning away from him, "all good."

"Right…I'll just…" He awkwardly shuffled away, hurriedly finding another room.

It was the most conversation they'd had in…gods, he wasn't even sure how long. And it felt incredibly ridiculous to feel excited by it.

He shook his head, methodically making his way through the hideout.

While he was curious about what the contents of the things he found were, he dutifully packed away anything he found that seemed important. Once it neared midnight and they had all seemingly finished combing through the place, they met in the initial room.

"We can rest here for the night then head out at sun up."

"We could make it home by noon tomorrow if we just go now."

"Sorry, Hanabi, I just don't think that's a good idea." Konohamaru shifted on his feet, looking away from what could end up being an impending argument. He just couldn't insert himself into it. "One night won't kill you two, alright? We can all play nice for a little while longer."

"Gods…"

They watched as she stomped down the stairs in a bratty fashion, then exchanged a look.

"What happened to her?" Udon frowned, lowering to seat himself on the floor. Konohamaru sighed and joined him. "That's not the Hanabi I remember."

"Not my place to talk about her," he mumbled, pulling his pack towards him to pull out a few scrolls.

"Guess not," he responded with a shrug, mimicking his actions.

Separately they summoned their own sleeping gear. They spent the next few minutes reminiscing on their findings, speculating on what some of it could mean. After some time, Konohamaru heard her soft footsteps coming up the stairs and quickly pulled his finger to his lips to quiet Udon. They both looked up at the doorway as she stopped within it, a small black box in her hands. "Found something else…"

Konohamaru watched the exchange between her and Udon curiously, wondering what could be so important that she was insisting on the safe being opened at that moment. He resisted the urge to intervene, to point out that they should leave it to the investigative team back home. It was hard to let Udon take the reins so freely when it was usually Konohamaru who handled that kind of stuff.

After a few minutes, they heard a 'click' and the safe popped open. When Hanabi basically tackled the safe out of Udon's hands, causing him to fall backward, he look at her in astonishment. So, she was a lot more eager than he thought. "Sorry! Thank you!"

She disappeared within the second, not allowing either of them to question her.

"Should we be concerned…?" Udon asked, righting himself as he rubbed at his lower back.

"Not yet."

Udon wasn't wrong in his assessment, in Konohamaru's opinion. Ever since their jōnin test mission, she really did seem like a different person. Being distant wasn't a novel concept when it came to Hanabi, but it had compounded over the last year, especially after that day she left his house. And honestly, something inside of him snapped as well.

He really did care about her. So perhaps that's why it hurt so much more. Playing this game of avoidance killed him a little more every time it happened. When he spotted her in the village and Jun greeted him, when they ran into each other at Naruto's home, when she hid after spotting him with his girlfriend. All of it hurt in a way he couldn't really describe but could feel deeply. Like it rearranged his guts uncomfortably, a feeling he couldn't escape as much as he told himself it was nothing. It was nothing.

They were never anything, after all.

He did manage to fall asleep, but it only felt like a few minutes when his head began vibrating with the wood below it. He scrambled to his feet, darting his eyes around until he caught the pouty glare Hanabi was offering their way.

Why does she look so damn cute even when she looks like she's going to kill me?

As Udon chastised her, Konohamaru brushed it off and threw himself into a deep stretch. As he brushed non-existent debris from his flak jacket, he peered back up at her to find her staring at him, but not with anger. It looked more like appreciation, which was a look that she had offered him exactly zero times over the last year, and it forced his blood to rush into his cheeks. When her eyes met his, they widened and she quickly whirled away from him, and if he didn't know any better, he'd guess it was to conceal her own blush.

He puffed his cheeks as he stared at her back, willing his eyes not to dip too low before she spoke, "we stayed the night like you wanted. Can we go now?"

Udon mumbled agreement and she was already taking off. They shared a look before quickly sealing away their belongings and bolting to catch up with her. Udon called after her on behalf of them and he saw the frustration in her movements, the way she skidded to a stop, balled her fists, and looked over her shoulder with drawn-together eyebrows. "What?"

"Well—you have that safe, still?" She nodded. "What was in it?"

"Junk."

Yeah right.

"I find that hard to believe…regardless, you do know it has to be turned over to Kakashi, right?"

"Yeah, of course."

Oh, she was up to something. They may have been distant over the year, but he had learned her body language—she was tense, and not because he was there.

"Hanabi," he finally dared to chime in, tilting his head down at her, "you're going to give it to Kakashi, right?"

"Jeeze!" She threw her hands up and rolled her eyes, "give me some credit!"

Just like he thought, she was dodging the question.

"That's not an answer," he pressed, stepping towards her. Finally, she looked up at him with what she probably thought was an intimidatingly angry glare.

"What do you want from me?"

"To tell us you're going to give it up," Udon joined in as she stepped back from them.

"O-of course I will," she replied, crinkling her nose briefly. Konohamaru's eyes lowered and she spoke through gritted teeth, "what?"

"You do that—" He pointed at her nose. "—when you're being dishonest."

"Do what?!" He held back a chuckle, ensuring his expression was nowhere near amused, despite him finding it incredibly amusing.

"Scrunch up your nose," he replied, simply.

He got a smug sense of satisfaction out of her shocked expression. She really had no idea how well he truly knew her. "I do not. I'm not being dishonest. I'll give it to him." He did not miss the way her upper lip twitched, as if holding back that crinkle once more.

"I'll hold you to it," Udon finished the conversation. "Let's get going."

Again, she was off in front of them, and Konohamaru ignored the suspicious glance Udon gave him.

She didn't even wait a full ten minutes before claiming she needed to pee, and Konohamaru had to resist the urge to follow her. Not for any nefarious reasons, but because he knew it was bullshit. As sneaky as she liked to think she was, she was a bright flashing sign to him, shouting from the rooftops that she was up to no good.

At this point, he wasn't even sure he wanted to confront her about it. Whatever she had in that safe was clearly important to her and she didn't seem to think she could trust any of them with it.

When they returned, reported in, and made their way to the evidence room, he watched her set the safe down along with all the other items they gathered. He looked on as Udon pulled the door of it open while her back was turned. Konohamaru couldn't resist a peak, finding just an ordinary journal within. That couldn't be all there was in there. What was she hiding?

Udon looked over his shoulder at Konohamaru, a perked eyebrow, and he simply offered a shrug back, turning away from them.

"Well, if that's all, I'm off to do my own report." He looked up at her as she raised her eyebrows at them, expecting an answer. They both nodded and she turned on her heel, jogging down the stairs of the Hokage tower to leave them alone.

"Wonder why she was so antsy about a journal…" Udon muttered, carefully pulling it from the safe.

"Who knows." Konohamaru shook his head, faking ignorance, knowing damn well a journal from the era of the second war written by a few rogue shinobi couldn't be all that was there. But he didn't want to rope Udon into this, so he chose to let him think that's all it was.

"Anyway." Udon yawned, tossing it back in the pile with the rest of the procured items. "I'm gonna hit the shower before I do my report. Don't be a stranger, yeah?"

"Yeah, alright."

Left alone, Konohamaru scanned the items briefly before heaving a sigh.

As much as he didn't want to, he had to confront her. Not because he really cared that she was keeping an artifact for herself—he did trust her judgment. If it was important to her or her clan, he knew she'd have good reasons for holding on to it. He didn't suspect her of bad intentions. He had to confront her because he knew if she was found holding onto artifacts from a mission, intentionally keeping them from the Hokage and investigation unit, she could end up in a concerning amount of trouble.

It was because he cared. That's what he told himself, anyway.

"You see where Hanabi went?" he called of another jōnin passing him on the stairs.

"Saw her walking down the hall of the second floor, maybe there?"

He nodded his thanks as he continued his journey down until he reached the second floor, glancing around for a moment before heading down the hallway. He peered into each room as he went until he spotted her brown head of hair draped over a desk. He breathed a sigh through his nose, mentally preparing himself as he stepped inside, intentionally making his footsteps noticeable so she wouldn't be entirely spooked by him. He saw her look over her shoulder and he tried to offer a smile, only to be returned with that glare he was becoming so accustomed to seeing.

"Can I help you?"

"Maybe." He tried to let the humor in his voice come out despite his tense position. He circled the table and pulled a seat out for himself, trying not to shrink under her gaze. He never really thought she looked that much like Hiashi until the last year. That Hyūga glare was undeniably genetic.

"You saw what was in the safe," she started, setting her pen down, "so will you get off my case?"

"Ah—that's the thing," he said as he leaned forward just as she leaned back, resting on his elbows, "that's not what was in there."

"Pfft." She blew at the strand of hair that stubbornly made a home on her nose at all times. "Well, sorry to say it wasn't as exciting as you probably hoped."

He raised an eyebrow. She couldn't think he was this dumb, could she? "That's exactly why I know that's not what was in there."

"You know what?" She shoved her chair back as she got to her feet. "I don't have to take this from you."

"Hey!" he called before she could finish gathering her report, holding out a hand for something that wasn't there, "just relax, okay? I'm not trying to grill you or anything. I don't even care what was in there." At this, she gave him a rare moment of gentleness, shoulders relaxing as she looked down at him curiously. Not wanting to waste the opportunity, he hurried, "seriously, I don't. You don't have to tell me, I have no right to know, okay?"

Slowly, she sunk back into her seat, her softened look hardening once more as she peered suspiciously at him. "So…?"

"So, I just," he sighed, shaking his head, "I just don't want you to get in trouble. What you're doing is technically a crime, Hanabi."

"And what am I doing?" She raised her eyebrows, back to feigning ignorance. "I've done nothing illegal."

"Hanabi…" He lowered his voice in an irritated grumble. "Knock it off. I know you switched out what was in there when you 'had to pee'. I'm not an idiot."

"Could've fooled me."

Well, he tried being nice.

"Gods," he groaned, falling backward into his seat as he dragged a hand over his face, "you're being a brat, you know that?"

She scoffed, folding her arms over her chest. "Coming from the biggest brat of them all."

Was she trying to push him? She must've because he felt his patience thinning to barely a thread. "You—" He caught himself, shutting his mouth and puffing out his cheeks. She raised expectant brows at him, tilting her head as if to mock him.

"What, Konohamaru?" She bent forward. "Go on, say what you want to say."

Through gritted teeth, he replied, "you think you're above it all, huh?"

To this, she stayed silent. He watched as she pursed her lips, resting back once more. If this is how she wanted to play it, then he'd play it right back.

"You make it really hard to care about you," he sighed, pushing his chair back as he got to his feet now. He avoided her eyes as he rounded the table to walk away. He paused in the doorway with his back turned to her, deciding to leave her with, "I won't tell Kakashi. Just don't say I didn't warn you."


The fifth time they saw each other, it was for Himawari's second birthday.

But this time, there were no awkward glances, no scurrying away from each other, no interaction whatsoever.

They simply kept their distance and acted like nothing was out of the ordinary.

And they continued on like that for longer than either of them wanted.