CHAPTER – 2

10 months later

"Danno!" Danny squinted as he saw his youngest son's small frame wave to him from the small beach behind McGarrett's house. "You wanna come and swim with me?"

"Hey buddy, how about we have some pancakes and then go back in the water later, huh? You hungry?" Danny called back, his one hand on his hip while the other held a small napkin on his shoulder. He smiled as Charlie ran inside and past him, into the kitchen.

"Hey! What are you, an animal?" Danny joked as he lightly smacked Charlie's head who was trying grab a plate for his pancakes. "Go wash your hands, we are civilized people, not like Uncle Steve, come on, get!"

Charlie giggled at his father's comment and went into the bathroom to freshen up as Danny made his famous pancakes.

His phone pinged and he quickly snatched it from the table. Disappointment marred his face as he saw a text from Lou asking if he was free.

"Is that from Uncle Steve?" Charlie asked him from the doorframe. Danny put the phone back and smiled at the small boy. He picked him up and sat him down on the counter top as he himself usually used to do while Steve cooked for him or, for some unidentifiably irritating reason, ironed his clothes in the kitchen.

"No, buddy. That was not Uncle Steve." Danny said as he handed Charlie a plate with his breakfast.

"I miss him, Danno." Charlie said sadly as he looked at his food. Danny sighed and bit his lip.

"I miss him too, kiddo." He said and patted his head. "But hey, what did Uncle Steve say when he called you last time, huh?"

Charlie grinned. "He said that he got me a lot of presents and he will be back soon."

"That's it!" Danny said and gave him a small high-five. "You gotta be patient for all those presents, you hear me? And presents from that man? I'm telling you, that's a lot. He does not like to spend his money." Danny mumbled as Charlie laughed; his mood instantly lifted. Danny envied his innocence. He wished he too thought of something as trivial as presents and forget about where Steve would be right now, whether he was okay, or alive even.

"You want some syrup?" Charlie nodded. "Alright which one you want? Boysenberry?"

Charlie wrinkled his nose in disgust. "No, maple, Danno! No one likes boysenberry! Uncle Steve says that's silly!"

"Oh, that's what he says, huh? Well, let him come, I'll make sure there's no maple syrup for him to eat for at least a year." Danny said with a mock growl as he put some syrup in Charlie's plate.

The bell rang and Danny turned off the stove to go answer the door. He had a pretty good idea of who it was.

"What's up, my man? You ignoring me, now, Williams?" Lou Grover's chirpy face was usually the first thing Danny saw almost every Saturday morning.
"I wish. I was feeding my offspring, who is giving me grief for eating boysenberry as instructed by his stupid Uncle Steve" Danny grumbled as he let Lou in. "You want some pancakes?"

"Nah nah, I'm good. Plus, I'm better at the pancake game than you." Lou teased as he waltzed into the kitchen behind Danny. "There's my little guy!" he greeted Charlie.

"Uncle Lou!" Charlie giggled at the man as Lou pretended to tickle him.

"Boy, you get big every time I see you, what your dad been feeding you?"

"Healthy nutritious food." Danny answered. "Not your cholesterol deadly stuff."

Lou scowled at him. "One time." Lou put up his finger. "One time I give him Pizza for breakfast and you been on my ass forever."

"Uh huh, and I will, forever." Danny said with the spatula as he poured two cups of coffee.

"Daddy, I'm done. Can I go play?" Charlie took his plate and set him down. "Sure, go ahead. But no going into the water unless I'm there, okay? Play with Eddie."

"'kay!" He said and raced off.

"So, what's up?" Danny asked Lou as they settled themselves outside on the lanai, watching Charlie play catch with Eddie.

"Nothing, just wanted to drop by as usual." Lou said as he took a sip of his coffee.

"I appreciate you checking up on me, Lou." Danny said. "But I'm fine, really."

Junior had moved in with Tani about a few months ago, leaving Danny to live alone in Steve's house. He never thought of going to his own place, and had settled in nicely at Steve's in his guest bedroom.

"Any word from our boy?" Lou asked.

Danny tsked and shook his head. "Last he called was the same a month ago, he was in Seoul, I believe. It's been radio silence ever since."

Lou nodded. "We miss you back at Five-O, Danny."

Danny sighed but didn't reply. He had resigned from the task force a month ago. It was just too much for him. He hadn't had a partner ever since Steve had left. Sure, he rode with any one of the team members, but it was never like Steve and his partnership. Lincoln tried to be with him for a while, imitated Steve's actions and tried to take his place, but Danny was not too happy about it. Much to everyone's surprise, he never let Lincoln drive his Camaro. The offices felt very empty without Steve's presence and Danny soon found himself feeling very alone. He felt like he never fit in with the team. They were all pretty young, and Lou had his family. And Danny? With Steve off gallivanting around the world, and Grace off to college, Danny just had Charlie with him.

So hence, after careful deliberation, he had gone to Governor and given his resignation. The Governor had just looked at him skeptically before telling him that she will not accept it unless and until his 'boss' says okay.

Who was 'boss', you ask? Yes, that was Steve freaking McGarrett. Apparently, that stupid bonehead had not resigned and hence, he was still the leader of the task force and resignation of any team member was to be done through him.

Trust Steve to make my life difficult even after being in the other part of the world.

This particular incident had caused Lou enormous entertainment. He had enjoyed Danny ranting and raving about for 45 mins trying to call Steve and give him a piece of his mind. Steve, of course, had fallen off the grid with no contact with the outside world whatsoever.

Finally, the Governor had settled into telling him that she will accept his resignation when Steve returns and if Danny still wants to leave.

Her predecessors counted on Five-0 to keep the islands safe. After seeing them in action, she had understood why they had agreed to give them immunity and means. She was very well versed with the close relations between the leader duo, always getting updates from them, seeing them bicker and fight. So, she knew why Danny wanted to resign, and understood his concerns, but she was not ready to let go the second leg of the task force after McGarrett.

Hence, Danny's letter now sat at the bottom of Governor's right table drawer. In an act of childish display, Danny too, had stopped going to the office and had handed the reigns over to Grover.

Surprisingly, Lincoln had left as well. He had thought that being a cop would be a good choice for him after serving, but apparently not everyone can walk the beat. He made some mistakes in the field, but Danny and Lou had been patient and had tried to teach him the ways. But after one incident where his small mistake had gotten one innocent hostage killed, Lincoln quit and left to go on the mainland.

Now Five-0 had Grover, Tani, Adam, Junior and Quinn. If anyone asked Danny, he would say they were pretty qualified to run the task force, their numbers hadn't dropped since Steve and Danny had left and that just showed that the leaders had trained them well. Plus, under Lou's supervision, Danny knew the younger members had a great mentor.

"It's been a month, Lou-" Danny started.

"1 whole month of you being bored up to your ass here in this house." Lou said sharply. "1 month of us barely surviving-"

"-You've been doing a fine job."

"What is a fine job? Everyone wants-needs you back in the field, Danny." Lou said determinedly. "I've been patient with you for all these weeks man, but you can't do this anymore. Is this what you wanna do for the rest of your life? Just sit around depressed and alone? You got Charlie right now, but he's gonna leave soon too, what you gonna do then?"

Danny closed his eyes as listened to Lou go on and on about his life choices. This was a routine for him. Every week or so Lou would come over and try to change his mind about joining the back the team. Danny would always listen and just deny again before walking away from the conversation. But today, something had changed, and Lou could see that. Danny did not look like he would chew Lou's ears off today. He was quiet, but listening.

"What do you want from me, Lou?" Danny asked, his voice uncharacteristically resigned.

"I want you to come back to Five-0 where you belong, brother. We are your Ohana. And we are not going to leave you alone like this." Lou said with a shake of his head. "You were the guiding light everyone needed after Steve left. Now that you've left, I am trying to hold down the fort, but I need your help, Danny. I really need your help."

Danny looked into Lou's eyes and saw nothing but sincerity and desperation. He sighed and finished his coffee. This whole month, he hadn't done anything much. He just sat around, had Charlie, took care of Eddie and the house. He knew Lou was right. He couldn't sit around like this forever. Charlie was also growing up. Soon, he wouldn't want to spend time with his Danno. He sometimes refused to come to Danny's and insisted on going to his friends' place, and Danny would be left all alone. Danny knew his choices were not good, but he didn't know what else to do other than this.

His love life wasn't exactly adventurous. He had stopped going out altogether. He sometimes went to bars, but never had his heart set on anyone. After Joanna and Rachel, it was just too hard for him to give someone a piece of him.

Soon after Steve had left and Danny had half way recovered from his torture session with Dayui Mei, he had started having panic attacks and nightmares. He had stopped sleeping and eating. After a lot of thinking, he had decided to see a therapist.

He still saw her sometimes, mostly to renew his prescription for anti-depressants, but sometimes for a session or two too. Nobody knew about it, of course. Not even Steve.

Steve called sometimes, or mostly texted. A text here and there would always give Danny relief to know that his best friend was alive and well.

He sometimes sent photos of him and Catherine on adventures, sometimes short videos telling Danny how much he missed him or some other goofy stuff. Danny loved these small updates. He really missed Steve. Danny had always been a social person in Jersey. He grew up in a big family and was close to his parents as well as siblings. He was especially close to Matty, and after he died, Steve was the one person whom Danny always sought in times of need.

Steve was not just his partner or best friend; he was his brother. Their relationship ran deeper than blood. Being apart from his partner for so long with such little contact killed Danny day by day.

Sure, he had everyone here. He had his team, but they could never be what Steve was for him. He was a source of comfort at the end of the day. Danny knew he could count on Steve and dumped so many things on him which he couldn't share with his family in Jersey or with anyone else in Five-0. For Steve, Danny was the same.

But now, the SEAL had the love of his life with him, roaming around the world with him, and Danny was happy for him. His friend deserved this time.

Hence, he never pestered Steve when he called. Never told him about his struggles with depression, his panic attacks, his nightmares. Hell, Steve didn't even know he quit the task force. Making Steve feel guilty and return back for Danny sure sounded like a good idea, but Danny wasn't that petty or selfish.

So, he handled everything. He still handles everything to this date, all alone. He trusted no one else with his burdens.

"Lou, what can I tell you…" Danny said softly. He missed being a cop. He was a cop through and through. But he feared whether he could have his team's back in a fight or not due to his meds. He feared that he would freeze in field and that could result in any one of his team getting injured. His therapist had listened to his decision, but hadn't commented, and Danny took that as agreement.

Lou sighed as he saw the wheels churning in Danny's head. He knew he had struck a nerve. All he hoped was for Danny to see the right path and go with it. Five- 0 was solving crimes, but they needed Danny. They needed his cop instincts, his brilliant expertise and his gut instincts. He was a cop longest of all of them, and some things only Dany could see through his 'cop lens', as McGarrett used to call it. McGarrett might be the brawns, but Danny was the brains behind Five-0.

Also, the team was concerned for him. He had recused himself from all social gatherings, didn't talk to anyone directly other than Lou. His life was limited to house and Charlie.

Lou stood up, knowing that his words had made a dent today. Danny would need some time to mull over everything and hopefully, the decision would be in Lou's favor.

"Look Danny, I'm just worried about you, man." He spoke and looked ahead towards where Charlie and Eddie were playing with a ball. "You take care now. I love you, brother."

Danny remained silent as Lou left the house and drove off, his hands gripping the chair tightly.

/

Lou drove his car out to the beach and towards Kamekona's shrimp truck. The Saturday morning rush was dying down and Lou could find a seat for him at their usual table. He smiled to himself as he remembered all the times he had spent on that table with his current and older team.

Danny and Steve arguing over food or whatever other non-sensical thing the boys could come up with, Kono trying to add fuel to fire and Chin, the Zen master of all, just smiling and trying to get them to shut up. It all played out in front of his eyes as if it was yesterday.

His phone rang and without looking Lou answered it.

"Grover."

"Haven't forgotten about my golfing skills due to my absence now, have you, old man?"

Lou huffed out a surprised laugh.

"Tell me you did not just call me an old man, McGarrett." Lou said as a wide smile took over his face. "How and where in the whole wide world have you been, you asshole?"

A chuckling laugh came from the other side of the phone. A laugh Lou missed dearly. He could identify Steve McGarrett's infectious laugh anywhere.

"I've been good, Lou. Just off the grid for a while." Steve said. "How you been?'

"Well, hanging here and there." Lou said honestly. "Missing you, brother."

"I miss you guys too." Steve's solemn reply came from the other end. "How is the team? How is everyone? How are you and the kids?" He fired.

"Oh, good good, great." Lou nodded and gave him a brief report of how Tani, Junior, Adam and Quinn were doing. He told him about Samantha and Will's college adventures, and his and Renee's adjustment to the new Condo life.

"And Danny? Has our beloved grinch stolen my office yet?" Steve asked eagerly.

Lou's smile dropped from his face. Steve could sense the sudden drop in the jovial conversation. He had also noticed how Lou had conveniently skipped Danny out previously while talking about the Team.

"Lou? Is everything okay? Is Danny alright?" His voice came across with a little more panic than he would have liked lining his tone.

"You didn't call him?" Lou asked, avoiding the line of questioning.

"I did. I wanted to know that fish and chips joint he kept on incessantly talking about in London for half of my life, and now when I needed the name, that jerk didn't answer. I thought he must be with Charlie or in the office with you completing paperwork."

"He's was with Charlie when I saw him a while ago." Lou agreed.

"Lou, there's something you're not telling me."

Lou sighed. Trust McGarrett to read him even from a thousand miles away.

"You don't know, do you?" Lou said softly, knowing he had to deliver the news.

"Know what?"

"Danny…quit, Steve." He broke the news carefully.

"What? When?"

"About a month ago." Lou said and explained the situation to Steve. He told him how Danny had distanced himself from everyone, how he tried to change Danny's mind every week including today.

"But, wait a minute, he can't quit. I haven't quit and his resignation didn't go through me." Steve's voice came.

Lou snorted at that. "Oh yeah, you got hell to pay for that, McGarrett. Danny has a list of things, about a mile long, for which he will read the riot act to you."

Steve gave a small chuckle but didn't say anything further.

"Is he…okay, Lou?" Steve asked quietly. Lou could hear the guilt radiating off of Steve. Damn these boys…

"Steve, don't you worry about him." Lou said with a little uplift in his tone. "We're here for him. You focus on yourself life right now, forget about Hawaii. God knows you deserve this time off."

Steve sighed. "I can never forget about Hawaii, Lou. That's home. And Danny… If something's not right with him, I need to know."

Lou could hear the Commander in Steve wake up as he spoke. He didn't ask Lou to tell him about Danny, he had ordered it.

"Steve...he's lost right now." Lou said honestly. "We all are trying to be there for him, but he keeps pushing us away. I have a feeling he's hiding something. And you know him, he might be the big mouth that he is for other's secrets, but if that man wants to hide something of his own, not even pliers can get his freaking mouth to open."

Steve knew that. He knew that about Danny very well. Danny spouted ten useless things to hide one important thing. Talking, or rather mindless chatter was that man's way of deflecting attention from himself onto someone else.

"You don't worry about that. Tell me about yourself. What you been doing? How's Catherine?" Lou tried to change the subject but he knew Steve wouldn't let it go.

"She's fine. She is not with me right now, though. She had to leave urgently."

Lou frowned. "Leave? Where to?"

"I don't know. Something work-related. She couldn't divulge into any details. Can't say I'm not enjoying the solitude though." Lou could sense something in his voice which he couldn't place. Something not so right.

"We miss you, Steve." Lou said seriously. "Your home misses you."

"I will come back soon, Lou. Sooner than you can imagine."

"Yes, well guess what, you get your ass back here and I promise you I won't tease you about your dismal golf skills for at least a month."

"I think we have already established I'm better at golf that you."

"In your dreams, McGarrett."

Steve laughed. "You take care, Lou. And you take care of my boy while I'm away, okay?"

"You got it, Steve."

The phone disconnected leaving Steve with an extra itch to catch a flight back to Oahu.