Decided to go with Plan: More Funny. Still serious but the worst is over. Probably.

Frank held Joey's hand in a death grip.

"...Charlie Foxtrot! We need CAS at the designated coordinates-"

Danny howled into his comms. Doc was furiously trying to stem the bleeding from Joey's belly. Billy screamed obscenities at the enemy as thump thump did her work. The lmg barked their fury. A mortar hit the building next to them.

"YOU FUCKERS SHOT MY BEST FRIEND, YOU SON'S O-"

Joey was fading.

"Wake the fuck up son, stay awake! That's an order private!" He couldn't tell where Doc's blood stained hands met their boy's stomach. His brown hands just disappeared amidst the blood.

"That's right boy stay the fuck awake." they'd already given him morphine.

"Am I…dying…Mr. Yager?"

Their eyes both went wide as they yelled out refusals.

"No son, you're fine. You're fine."

"Doc…Brown…I'm sorry Billy…called you…that word once. He…he didn't mean it."

"I know man, I've been called worse, conserve your energy."

"FUCKERS!"

"Mr. Yager…I'm sorry…I called yer gran…grandpappy a Nazi…I..I was drunk."

"Conserve your energy boy, I've got thick skin."

"Will you…..Tell my mama I love her?"

He struggled with his words, slurred them.

"Yes son, we'll tell her together over steak and ham-"

Doc held his shoulder. He was already gone, that brilliant light had vanished from his eyes. He grabbed his gun. Frank Yager was gunna kill some sons a bitches for Joey.

"CASUALTY, CASUALTY, CASUALTY!"

Sasuke opened his eyes. He wheezed and gasped and struggled against his bonds.

"Sasuke! It's alright, it's alright!"

Kakashi was holding him down. The hot wind was against his face. Where was the enemy?

"Where are they? Send me at 'em. Send me at 'em!"

"You need to calm down Sasuke. Naruto and Sakura are fine, stand down!"

Kakashi was huggin' him for dear life.

"Wha' the fuck happened capptin?"

His words wouldn't come out right. His eyes hurt, his ribs hurt, gosh dammit everything hurt. Kakashi simply slumped against his chair.

"Orochimaru. We've sealed that thing with a stop-gap. You need to get up Sasuke, your match is in ten minutes."

Kakashi's eyes held a clear expectation. To be frank, heh heh, he really didn't give a damn about promotion right now. But he'd come this far. He did care. He cared a lot actually. Promotion.

"Point me at the enemy."

Tucker nodded, pulling out a syringe from somewhere. Chunin or bust he supposed.

"Is that-"

"Adrenaline. Just a bit, no chakra pills. Are you sure? You can stay here. The Hokage is already considering your promotion."

Fuck yeah. He was ready. The world swirled. Considering was not, "would happen".

"Stab me captain."

Kakashi did with a grimace. HOLY BLUE FUCK HE WAS ALIVE. They undid the straps quickly. Kakashi used shunshin to expedite their progress to the arena. The world was a blur. Somehow he was standing in front of some kid he vaguely remembered was called Yoroi.

"Don't use chakra."

He nodded at Captain Tucker's words. This would be hard. His sword was in his hands. He could shoot it damn near up to five-hundred meters, expert marksman he was. Why was everything so fuckin' blurry? Ah right no Sahringan. Let's fix-

A lance of pain shot through his eyes like somebody stabbed them. He felt blood drip down his face. Right, no gas.

"Genin Uchiha, are you alright?"

"Yep right as rain."

The procter was lookin' at him funny. His hand rose and was cast down.

"Hajime!"

"Gee, o mighty Uchiha don't fall over."

The kid thought he was funny. Little punk ass was about to get a rude awakenin'.

"Come on over here so I can cut yer hands off."

Yori, or somethin', scowled and moved in to attack. Wow he's fas-. Sasuke took a right to the head from a weird ass stretchy arm. He swiped his sword at it, but the boy was too fast.

"What was that about my ha-" Sasuke moved in while the boy jabbered. Yuki flinched as Sasuke's blade bit into him from collarbone to shoulder. Not too deep but deep enough. Yosi fell to the ground and clutched his arm. Huh, that might have been too deep. Liek Nietzsche. Nietzsche you pour bastard, man fuch his sister.

"AH, fuck! Dammit!"

"I'd give up iffin' I was-"

Sasuke couldn't finish for a fist shut his jaw. Thank God the adrenilie fixed his hurts well. He stood bak up. Whew that boy looked hurt.

"Hey feller I can see yer collarbone."

"Shut up, I can still fight!"

He looked at the prospector who simply shrugged. Good goin' Hayah or whatever. The boy was right in front of him. Time was slower as a fist hurtled towards his jaw. Sasuke lunged at the kidd, intent on stabbin. He'd got too close. The blade was in teh boy's stomach before he knew what happened. Tha both of 'em, that was. He didn't pull the blade out.

"MEDIC!" Sasuke screamed. It was like he was up in the stands watchin' things unfold. Wait. He was. He fell over.

Kakashi nearly punched the wall. He'd carried Sasuke to the medics. Reckless, why did you let him go, why didn't you stop him. Sasuke had wanted it, he'd seen it in his eyes. Now he was in critical condition. Because Kakashi couldn't say no to a boy who was just like himself.

"Stab me captain."

"I can do it captain."

"Don't let me die, captain."

"Tanaka's dead captain."

It rang in his ears, over and over again his failures played in his mind. He sobbed before his latest one. Anko's life monitor beeped pathetically. Her legs were broken. Orochimaru.

"Orochimaru!"

His whispered growl was punctuated by another beep. Why did you get close? You knew. YOU KNEW YOU WERE CURSED. He was going to kill him. Hunt him down and rip out his still beating heart as soon as this despair left him. When the hate finally consumed him.

"Kakashi." he didn't look at the Hokage.

"Do we know where he went."

"Kakashi."

"Requesting S-rank mission Hokage-sama. Where is the last kno-"

"KAKASHI."

He closed his eyes.

"Let me loose. Please. Cry havoc. I'll do it for you." he looked the Hokage dead in the eyes. "I'll kill him."

The Hokage's weathered face did not move an inch. His stern gaze did not waver. His eyes shut in a grimace. He handed him a mask. It was the Dog.

"Form a team. Your pick. Hunt, kill, and savage any and all enemy operations inside Konoha. Jiraiya and Tsunade are coming."

"Cat, Tenzō, Fox. Team Raijin."

"Go."

With the Hokage's pained whisper he flew out the window, decades of training flexing through his muscles as his apartment was entered with nary a trace. Reached within minutes. He walked to the closet. He donned the armor. It reeked of blood and countless battles punctuated by screams of the damned.

Take it.

He took his father's blade from the wall. It crackled as he unsheathed it, the pulsating white light called for blood. He could see his father's ghost, empty eyed and lifeless. Mournful. Regret stained.

Dog stood atop a nearby rooftop. His team crouched before him as the sun set below the horizon. No one said a word.

"On me. We kill everything that isn't marked by the leaf."

They gladly received their orders. The streets would be drowned in blood, and before dawn the rivers would vanish. Dog would find him. He could not hide. Not from him. Not from vengeance.

"Go"

His hounds howled in the night.

Sasuke's eyes flickered open. Where the hell was he? Memories flitted through his mind hitting him like a truck. Holy blue fuck, how am I alive? They'd always said he was lucky. He hoped that boy he stabbed was alright. He felt good, normal. He wondered how long he'd been asleep. He tried activating the Sharingan. It worked. He got out of bed. His legs worked as well. His shoulder itched. He yanked the hospital gown down.

"Fuck."

The cursed seal of heaven. It had a solid black circle around it, but he could still feel the whispers in his mind. Calls for total annihilation. Death to all things living. It made him sick. Niggling little thoughts in his soul that brought the worst of his life to the fore. Madness incarnate. What the hell kind of fire was Orochimaru playing with? He now understood what had caused Sasuke to grow so unrepentantly mad. No kid would ever be able to resist these sweet promises of power. Holy shit it was more attractive than a bag of coke. No like three bricks. Okay, meth. Maybe both at once. With some of that adrenaline mixed in. His wistful rememberings of drunken debauchery were halted by the door being opened.

"Let's just check in on…O!"

Shizune…what the hell was her last name anyway? Whatever, she stood in the door frame clutching a clipboard to her chest. On further inspection…damn she was pretty. Straight black hair, pale white skin, onyx eyes complemented by a bluish kimono; was everybody in this world a part time model or something? Wonder what Tsunade looked like. Wait, Shizune was here!?

"Y-you should be in bed Sasuke-san!"

"I feel fine."

"Wha-, that doesn't matter! Get in bed…now."

Oho, she was using the patented, if you don't do as I say I'm going to castrate you, forbidden woman vocal technique. Well, he hadn't had some good wholesome fun in a while.

"Hmm, well sweetheart tell you what." he tapped his cheek. "I'll do it for a peck."

It was moments like these, when he could memorize the absolute shock on someone else's face when he told an outrageous joke that he truly appreciated the Sharingan.

"T-that's highly inappropriate Sasuke-san, I'm years your senior."

"O, fair maiden, why hobble yourself so? I know you are…young at heart."

She started scribbling something on her clipboard, a worried expression on her face.

"Serious brain damage likely."

Sasuke started laughing so hard it hurt. Shizune was not impressed.

"Oh lordy yer just funny, sorry. Hey…" he looked at her conspiratorially as he laid down. "These painkillers are something else huh."

"Lessen amount of painkillers. Okay Sasuke-san, would you like to see your friends?"

"Sure, send them over."

Shizune hurriedly left. Sasuke made note of this. Easily flustered.

He'd done it, the Chunin exams were the last real threat before he could do just about anything he wanted for years. Well there was the eponymous Konoha Crush but…oh shit they hadn't even interacted with Gaara yet. He fucking forgot because of his nerves. Dumbass. Well, he had a plan for that. Gaara was just looking for direction and with a few well placed words, playing on his worst insecurities, he might just be able to subdue him through Talk no Jutsu. Perhaps. Maybe. The real problem was trying to get those forbidden techniques. One sacrifice of his eye would put that bastard Danzo in Izanami, probably forever, as it was unlikely he would just repent his sins. Even then he'd still put the selfish cur down, maybe he'd slit his own throat under the aftereffects of Izanami. Could be.

And then there was the Akatsuki. Itachi and Obito. Orochimaru still prowled about. Was Madara even alive? Zetsu. Becoming strong enough to unify the ninja nations. Suddenly he felt like drinking. Fuck it. In true marine fashion he wasn't about to let a good mood go sour. He'd show those 82nd bastards who could really drink. He unsealed a flask. Sniff! Moonshine baby. And a cigarette he bummed from someone that one time in Henge when he was dangerously close to relapsing.

"One for mama, one for Pa, one for the lord and the trinity's arrived!"

His swill tasted like the crap they put on wounds. But damn, he loved mixing morphine and alcohol. His world swam comfortably. Finally. Some real GD R&R. He took a big hit of tobacco. Then the door opened.

"Okay brat, Shizune said you were acting weird so whaaaat?"

What stood before him was perhaps the single most beautiful woman he had ever seen. He had painted hundreds, if not close to a thousand, people in total. It boggled his mind that there existed someone with perfectly symmetrical, absolutely proportional features. This was someone who could only have been designed. Fetching blonde hair, lightly tanned skin, a huge pair of…beautiful brown eyes. He looked at his moonshine. He looked back at Tsunade Senju. He couldn't stop himself.

"HELLO NURSE!"

She blinked at his wolf whistles, before cracking her knuckles.

"I would hit you boy, but you've clearly got brain damage. So I'll ask nicely, what is the matter with you."

"Morphine and moonshine."

"Where on earth did you get that from?" she said as she swiped it. Ah, dammit she was fast. She gave it some tentative sniffs and noticed that the bottle was half empty. She wasn't, was she? She had also taken and crushed his cigarette. Man, he hated adults.

"I wouldn't drink…actually go ahead." Tsunade had snorted at his warning, and ya know; he was kinda mad for his cigarette. She took a gulp. And immediately put her hand to her mouth. He could have sworn her pigtails went straight up into the air, her eyes as wide as dinner plates. She swallowed, coughing furiously.

"What the hell was that?" she said, gagging. In truth it was an old recipe, passed from eldest to eldest in his family since ages passed, when Germany was fragmented, and there had only been one church in the land. Improved by modern techniques and practices, it was just about the only chemistry he knew.

"95.5% ethyl alcohol."

"Fucking what. We put that shit on the wounded kid, not drink it." he assumed the thinking man pose. "Well, you do. I drink it. Alright I also use it as an antiseptic, but sometimes courage juice is necessary for sustained combat operations."

Tsunade just stared at him for a while. The gears in her head were obviously turning towards the, he's crazy, setting. She dumped his drink out the window.

"No! Why? Why are you so cruel to me?"

"No." she said. "No, no, no, no drinking ethyl alcohol in my hospital!"

She gave him a very long lecture about the importance of liver health and the stupidity of his actions.

"Can I have a cigarette at least?" she fumed, her skin turning an interesting shade of red. He loved fucking with the medics sometimes. Before she could explode, another familiar blond entered his room. Man, he'd been blond once.

"Sasuke!" Naruto blubbered all over his gown. He pat the kid on the head.

"Yo!"

"I thought you were gonna die man!" Sakura entered and did much the same. They were both a teary mess. Even Haku arrived! She looked very relieved.

"Death will have to catch me first, Naruto. And you haven't yet bitch!" he yelled triumphantly. Tsunade had her head in her hands. She mumbled something like suicidal maniacs. Ah, she cared.

"Hey, hey Sasuke look at what I can do!" Sasuke didn't think anything could surprise him at this point. Then Naruto did the Rasengan.

"HOLY FUCK NARUTO!"

"Langua-, ah screw it. Yeah impressive right?" Tsunade said with a sardonic laugh. What the hell had happened while he slept? She saw the question in his eyes. "You've been out for two and a half weeks, boy. Your little friends have been busy."

"Damn, two weeks and you learn the fourth's Jutsu, eh? Any other surprises Naruto?"

"Yeah I finally learned Chakra Transfer, watch." Sasuke's eyes went wide, before he could say anything he was blasted by Naruto's chakra for a solid minute. It was so energizing, so pure. He grit his teeth as he visibly glowed for a solid minute.

"Um, that's not supposed to happen is-" Sasuke started screaming as his left eye felt like somebody was digging it out with their fingers. Congratulations, you win. WHO THE FUCK SAID-

"Sasuke-kun! Wha…your eye." there was a mirror on the bedside table which Sakura held up nervously. Tsunade stared open-mouthed.

"By the gods, the heavenly eyes of legend." Haku's astonishment was written plainly across her face.

The Rinnegan. Sasuke's Rinnegan. The tomoe span wildly. He felt the pain on his shoulder lessen. He felt like he could take on a hundred thousand men. He actually had the Samsara Eye. He heard laughter echoing through his mind. Indra had approved of him, or perhaps even the Sage of Six Paths himself.

"HAHA, Itachi is dead!"

Everybody's face was palmed. What did they think he was going to say, I love puppies? The kiddie gloves were fucking off. He was gonna kill every single one of those dumb fucks and bring peace to this land. Or die trying. Tsunade quickly ran a whole gauntlet of tests on him and swore everyone in the room to secrecy. In the end, Tsunade gave him a perfect bill of health.

"You're in better shape than ever before. Can you turn the eye off?"

"Yep."

"Now back on again."

"Uh-huh."

"One more time?"

"...Dance monkey dance."

"Smartass."

Tsunade put her hands up in the air. She really couldn't figure out what had just happened, or why. Sasuke knew, but why would he say that? Sorry Tsunade mystical bullshit, no science involved. Being a rational woman she would probably just move on. He suddenly realized that the person closest to his actual age was said medic. And they were both a little irresponsible. Maybe age didn't convey wisdom, but insanity from the crushing weight of time. Maybe it was the drugs in his system.

"Is he always like this?"

"Uh, sometimes." Naruto scratched the back of his head and leaned into Tsunade conspiratorially. "We think he's got two personals, ya know?"

"Personalities Naruto. And I do not. I simply don't express myself sometimes."

"Sasuke-sama, you mean to say that in your mind you're always so…"

"Lecherous?" Sakura glumly said.

"Badass!" Naruto proudly shouted.

"Foolish." Tsunade stated.

"Rambunctious. I was going to say incorrigible."

"Personally, I would say I'm daring."

Everyone groaned at his superior wit. Tsunade saw no reason to keep him hospitalized, as he seemed better than when he had even stepped into the forest of death. So now he stepped forth from the hospital a free man. And a god. The eyes, O the eyes of Samsara! Fate was now his bitch, creation his pawn. Alright they weren't that powerful but damn, he could kill just about anybody by ripping out their soul. He could summon four arms and literally become Asura's wrath. Shoot a fucking city destroying beam from his hand. Summon chakra chains that could contain tailed beasts. Absorb any chakra. Revive the dead. Control gravity. Summon the actual king of hell and have him devour liars in his presence. Summon city destroying beasts. See through six bodies that acted under his own will and could use any of the paths without discretion. See chakra and through most barriers. Master all five elemental releases and any Jutsu. Rejuvenate himself with absorbed chakra. Rejuvenate himself with the king of hell. Use a barrier to negate all chakra based attacks. Use Amenotejikara to switch places with anything. Instantly. And…yeah he was pretty sure that was everything. What was Naruto about? Ninjas? Bullshit. Thank God he wasn't in Bleach. Nothing made sense there. Nothing made sense here. Sometimes he wished he was trapped in One Piece as Zorro. One Piece made sense. At least he wasn't in Fairy Tail.

Now that would suck.

How did Pain lose? What an idiot.

He was very pleased that everyone seemed to think him some energetic madman. Even he had noticed that his old self had been coming to the fore more oft. More brutal, more rowdy, and far less formal than the character he'd been portraying. He thought about the past few months and wondered if anybody remembered that tightly controlled boy. Well, any normal boy would be shattered by the previous encounters with bizarrely overmatched opponents. Sasuke certainly had been originally when confronted with the absurdity of his reality. There were at least three monstrously powerful beings plotting the end of the known world so…damn it must suck to be a civilian. One of them was in the Moon! Regardless, as he made his way into the Uchiha district with his comrades chatting his ear off, passing the ever familiar Naka shrine home to the Uchiha family's personal Shinto god taking a more scenic route to-, the shrine. The stone tablet. The most secretive place in the entire Uchiha district. The one place he had forgotten about.

"HAHAHAHA!" Sasuke laughed maniacally at his own stupidity. Just once would he like to re-read Naruto with the Sharingan. God knows what else he was forgetting about the series. It wasn't like he'd be getting that chance anytime soon. "Sasuke-sama, you would tell us if you were insane, yes?"

"No, no. I'm not going insane. I just thought of a funny joke for my next book."

"You write Sasuke-kun?"

Sakura's whole body emanated curiosity. Hmm, this would probably be more shocking and harder to explain than insanity, but nothing ventured, nothing gained. He pulled out a little red book from one of his many seals criss-crossing his body. Its title was writ in gold lettering, Night of the Heart. A small portrait of a knight kissing a princess's hand adorned the cover. Haku turned crimson, her hands flying to her mouth.

"No…"

"Haku-chan…you a fan?"

Haku stammered out refusals, denials, and multiple shocked expressions that caused Sasuke immense pleasure.

"Ahh, so you didn't like it."

"Well, no-, yes..I mean, I've never seen that book in my life."

Sakura looked between the book, and Haku's flustered form. A light bulb shined above her head.

"Sasuke! No!"

"...What are you guys freaking out about?"

Naruto clearly had no clue what the book was probably about. Sasuke approached Naruto and put a hand over his shoulders.

"Within the pages of this book lies an epic. Sword's, sorcery, great beasts, and pure love." Naruto still didn't get it. "What?"

"I wrote an Icha Icha book for women Naruto, they can't get enough of it. It's like crack for girls."

Haku buried her head in her hands, glowing with embarrassment.

"No way, ero-sennin's been trying that for years. He says women are unpleasable in fiction."

"Heh, heh, trust me. They are not. Right Haku?"

"Sh-shut up!"

Then she walked very quickly away.

"Well guys, I just have to have some alone time real quick. I'll just be in the Naka shrine for a bit. Carry on."

Sakura looked like her world had shattered.

"I can fix him, I can fix him…my Sasuke-kun's no pervert."

Naruto guided the poor girl away.

"Hey…can I read-"

"No way buster, adults only."

"YOU WROTE IT!"

"Well Naruto, I am a god. What are the rules of men to a god?"

"You ass."

Sasuke beamed with positivity as Naruto left. He hadn't felt this happy in years. Final victory was in his grasp. He just had to not fuck it up. All he needed were those three years of uninterrupted training and he'd be golden. Subdue Garra, achieve outstanding merits in the field, get promotion, train, train, train. A thousand years of peace. Achieve immortality? Become a god? He put those last two in the, to be considered category.

Naka shrine was empty. Who else but the Uchiha would visit their gods shrine? He remembered it was under something, but didn't have to try every stone covering as it was pretty obvious that the covering with the seal on it was the one. The Rinnegan was cool. The password was inscribed on the stone, with writing only the Sharingan could see. Interesting.

It was a dark room with one tablet in the center. Dusty, and with little light. He sat before this relic from ages passed unsealing a notebook he used for various training reminders. Under his vision the tablet bent and morphed into shapes beyond his comprehension, filled with shocking information, to anyone who did not already know, far beyond the width of the small stone. They were there. Everything was there. He copied information he knew for certain to be true. The stuff about Madara's body. Kaguya and the infinite Tsukuyomi, he decided to just make up a warning about Kaguya's will, Zetsu, and indeed; he realized this was his perfect chance to simply reveal everything he could to the Hokage. Where had he gotten the information from? The Sage of the Six Paths. He made an etching of the tablet, and then lifted his hand. He had always wanted to see if this would work.

"Crush."

The thing imploded. Repulsive and attractive forces. Sasuke laughed into the darkness. Even to his own ears, it was a fearsome bark.

He entertained the kids for a few hours before shooing them away with a promise to start training tomorrow. Haku was simply satisfied with his excuses of having business with the Hokage. He also handed her a signed copy of his book. Her face contained embarrassment, but her hands held the book reverently. Ha. The sun shined gloriously as he walked into the Hokage tower.

"Come in Sasuke-kun."

The wizened man sat at his desk smoking as he wrote paperwork, stamped approvals, and overall did his job with astonishing speed. Sasuke couldn't help but notice how many papers he simply threw away.

"I've come to report something. Something important."

With a single hand Sasuke felt the presence of the Anbu stationed in the room disappear. Except for one. The man was located through the ceiling, and was perfectly still. He could see his chakra in his foot through a tiny hole. The Hokage was closing the blinds, and had activated some sort of seal underneath his desk.

"Is this about-"

Quickly Sasuke pulled the Root ninja through the roof. While he was stunned on the ground Sasuke put his hand on top of his head, and ripped out his soul.

"Uh-huh. Oh. Ugh, ah fuck, holy…"

Sasuke nearly vomited. The man knew the ins and outs of Root, he seemed to be very trusted and very high ranking. He spied on the Hokage after all. The things Root did however, the acts they had undertaken and the measures they made "for Konoha" were some of the single most sickening things he had ever witnessed. And that was saying a lot. He ripped the soul all the way out and let go. The man died without sound. The Hokage was already checking the body.

"What was that Sasuke?"

"Root. My suspicions were correct."

The Hokage's head snapped to him. A million expressions flitted across his face, before resignation.

"And what were those?" he pulled out the etching of the tablet and handed it to the Hokage, who studied it uncomprehendingly.

"Only the Rinnegan can decipher it in its entirety; it contains the secrets of the Uchiha." the Hokage sighed as he sat back down at his desk. "I know now, that there are more men complicit in my clan's erasure than merely Itachi."

Sasuke took off the glasses he had unsealed earlier that day and glared at the Hokage, eye's spinning. He told him everything he just found out about Root, and everything he now knew about that night. By the end the Hokage's head was in his hands.

"I also know why you did not execute him that night." Hiruzen looked at him in confusion. "He used Kotoamatsukami on you to excuse his transgressions."

Now he was well and truly shocked. Sasuke could tell that he was considering it. Why wouldn't he have Danzo executed for such a breach in the chain of command? To just disband Root was like a slap on the wrist in comparison to his crimes. When the Hokage's shock turned to fury, he knew Danzo was going to die. Afterall, how does one kill an entire clan of valuable shinobi without permission and simply live? The Hokage wasn't stupid, Danzo represented a massive liability. Sasuke assumed that he never spared him for that one assassination attempt either. Because that would be monstrously stupid.

"Summon him."

"No, that's too dangerous."

"I simply wish to ask him a question with the Naraka path."

"...What?"

Sasuke explained to him what the Naraka path did.

"Oh."

The Hokage pressed his intercom and requested a messenger hawk be sent to Danzo requesting his presence. Within thirty minutes the devil arrived.

"Hokage-sama, if I may ask-"

Sasuke summoned the king of hell behind Danzo, his tongue was caught before he knew what was going on.

"Are you loyal to Konoha?"

"Of course-"

He died. The truth was not something malleable nor convenient. It was absolute. He reappeared after a few moments, eyes wide. Sasuke absorbed his chakra, and used the king of hell again. It didn't cost him a lot to use the techniques of the six paths since it was his eye, what Nagato did was impressive considering his eyes originally belonged to Madara, but it was still a decent amount of chakra.

"Did you trick Itachi into killing his clan?"

"Th-this is madness, these accusations are false-"

He died.

"Have you conspired against the interests of Konoha?"

"Stop, no-"

He died.

He died over and over again. Sasuke should have counted, but he grew angrier and angrier at how many of his kinsmans eyes this butcher stole. Danzo tried to use techniques in between the intervals, but Hiruzen would smack him with Enma in the head, sometimes crushing his skull. He wasn't called The God of Shinobi for nothing. Sasuke asked him how many lives he had left, and Danzo actually told the truth about that. They killed him until his last life, where Sasuke pulled out his soul. He did vomit with that one. Horrible, horrible things. The Hokage looked at him with concern.

"Don't ask. I'll give you a report later. Please Hokage-sama, do not ask."

The Hokage slumped in his chair and nodded. Danzo was perhaps the single most cartoonish representation of villainy he had ever seen. It reminded him of S.S. officers who would burn hospitals, rape the nurses, and then hang them with the doctors. Vile men who committed acts of brutality that made his bloodlust pale in comparison. Atrocities, pure and barbaric. Made real in this world, Danzo's acts laid bare before him in crystal clear recollection; it hurt his soul. He simply left at the Hokage's biddance, stormed into his room and began writing the sins of Danzo Shimura. By the end of the night he was crying senselessly. He did not stop Haku who held him until he slept.

He would crucify Orochimaru.

I swear it.