Disclaimer: I only own the plot and my OCs. Anything you recognize as not mine belongs to Marvel Studios, Disney, and/or their otherwise respective owners.

Author's Notes: Yes, you are getting this as a bonus chapter this week. I have plans for the next chapter and I wanna make sure I write them while they're still fresh in my mind. For a hint, the one and only time you'll get something like this from me: somebody important shows up. Can you guess who? ;)

Chapter title comes from You Make Loving Fun by Fleetwood Mac. RIP Christine McVie, still not over her death.

As always, hope you enjoy,

~TGWSI/Selene Borealis

~primis, omega, superhero, genius~

~somebody to love~

~chapter 21: you make loving fun~

As soon as she was back in her apartment, Penny glared up at the ceiling. "JARVIS, I'm going to kill you."

"Seeing as how I am not alive, I think that would be rather hard to do."

"Don't get sarcastic with me, you know I could find a way," she accused. Burying her face into her hands, she let out a short scream. "Gah, why did you make me go downstairs to spend time with them last night? I can't do this! I can't, I can't, I can't – "

Before she could get too far ahead of herself, JARVIS said, "Delilah."

"What?" she cried.

"Breathe."

She took in a shallow breath, her chest heaving from the simple exertion.

"Breathe out," he instructed. When she did just that, he followed it up with, "Breathe in."

A few minutes passed of them doing that, him leading her down from the panic attack. Once it was over, she climbed up to the ceiling and sat down – up? – on it, digging her hands into her hair as she sniffled. "JARVIS, I can't do this," she repeated.

"And why not?"

She laughed brokenly. "Hello? They're my soulmates! Well, Bruce isn't, but I can't let him get close to me, either. If I do, he'll figure out I'm an omega, and he'll try to get me to stop my suppressants – and that's provided he doesn't figure out I'm their soulmate outright! Then, once he does, he'll tell them, and – "

"Are you sure you're not too focused on the, as they call it, 'worst case scenario?'"

"Yes!" But his tone, for some reason, had her faltering. "...No? I don't – "

He interrupted her. "I did not have you spend time with them last night because I thought Ms. Romanoff would invite you to dinner with them, Delilah. That was not my intention. My intention was to see if you would be able to get some sleep, which you have been sorely in need of almost every moment since I have met you, around them. This was proven to be more than correct, seeing as how you have slept twelve hours."

Penny sensed there was something underlying his speech. "But?"

"Sleep is not the only thing you have been in need of," he said. "Do you know how many calories you are in need of a day, Miss?"

The question made her uncomfortable, for multiple reasons: one, because she had a feeling of where this was going. And two, "It's not...really something I was really ever able to figure out."

"But, by a rough estimate, it is suffice to say it is probably more than three thousand?"

"Yeah..."

"Then we both know that you have not been eating that much," JARVIS continued. "Hence why perhaps attending tonight's dinner would be a good idea. If being around your soulmates helped you to sleep, it may help you to eat in this way as well. And it is statistically unlikely that anything is going to go wrong from your perspective, seeing as how much time has lapsed since you moved in and how much interaction you've had with the others. They are still clueless as to the truth as far as I know, I give you my word."

Once again, he was trying to guilt trip her.

And once again, it was working, as something twinged in her gut.

She sighed. She supposed her clothes had become...baggier in the last few months. The loss wasn't too bad but, if she was being honest with herself, she'd lost more weight than just that since the November where everything had gone wrong. Like, a lot more. She had to be at least ten pounds less of the 110 she'd been then.

"I don't have anything to wear," she tried to protest.

"I doubt that. If you will let me, I can be of service in helping you find an outfit to wear," he replied immediately. "I am up to date in both fashion trends and your style."

He meant her enabling him to turn on the cameras to her bedroom, even if it was for a brief period of time.

She swallowed.

"...Fine," she decided finally, letting herself unstick from the ceiling. "I better not wind up regretting this, JARVIS."

"Unfortunately, I can make no promises to that."

At five minutes till the half-hour of five o'clock, Penny took the elevator down to the communal floor. She was wearing the brown sweater Romanoff had gotten her at Macy's, along with a pair of denim jeans, a pair of converse, and a light brown scrunchy in her hair. JARVIS had pretty much picked out the entire outfit for her, which she wasn't too enthused about. It made her feel like she was going on a date, as casual as the outfit was, and this was not a date.

No way in hell.

The five other on-world Avengers were already on the floor. Clint saw her first, looking up. He gave her a smile and waved. "Hey, Spidey," he said, causing all of the others to look at her. "You eating with us tonight?"

Her face flushed from the sudden attention, or so she told herself. "Yeah," she said lamely. "Is that alright?"

"More than alright," Tony cut in. "We were just getting ready to go."

She sniffed, nervously running her hand up and down the strap of her purse. "Yeah, about that. Where are we going?"

He winked. "You'll find out."

...Yeah, that did not comfort her at all.

But, before she could complain about it too much, Tony clapped his hands. "Alright, everybody ready?"

The other four gave their agreements, so they all got into the elevator. Penny, since she was the first one in, hung back in one of the corners, pressing herself into it in what she hoped was a subtle way. Bruce smiled at her as he stood next to her. "Glad you could make it," he told her.

Her throat suddenly felt like it had turned into sandpaper. "Thanks," she forced herself to say anyways. "I'm...glad I could."

Steve stood on the other side of Bruce. He looked at her with those blue eyes of his, and she felt her heart stutter, remembering what Natasha had told her. Turning her head away from him, she gazed at the elevator wall, trying (and failing) to ignore the fact that her four soulmates were all within close proximity of her. Perhaps the closest they'd ever been all at once.

When she felt something liquid descend within her, she almost screamed right then and there. Her slick hadn't been a problem for months, and now it decided to act up? Now?

In the Avengers garage, Tony selected a black SUV for them to take to the restaurant. "I'm driving," he said, hopping into the driver's seat to prove his point.

"Spider-Woman should take shotgun," Natasha suggested lightly.

Penny spluttered. "What? No."

"She's right," Steve agreed. "You haven't sat in the front seat when you've been out with us before."

That's because I haven't been out with you guys like this before except for missions, you idiot. "Don't you need the leg room?" she tried to redirect him. "I can sit in the back. Really, it's fine."

He shook his head. "I think I can manage."

"Come on, Blondie," Tony called out then. "We haven't got all day."

She...wasn't going to win this argument, was she?

With a barely audible huff, she went to the front passenger seat and strapped herself in. Tony started up the car when they were all inside. "JARVIS, play something that's to all of our tastes."

To her surprise, JARVIS said from the speakers, "I think I can manage that, sir." Tony must've retrofitted the car to have a portable version of the AI inside instead of a radio, although if you'd looked before he'd spoken, you wouldn't have noticed.

A second later, Fleetwood Mac began to play from the speakers.

Penny stared out the window as they headed off to their destination, drumming her fingers against her purse. She focused on the music rather than the quiet chatter of Steve, Clint, and Bruce behind her. Gypsy wasn't her favorite of all of the songs by the band, but maybe that was just because of everything she'd gone through over the past several years. The song was about nostalgia, or so in her opinion, about things that could never be. And, well –

"She was just a wish, she was just a wish. And her memory is all that's left for you now..."

That sounded like her, didn't it? The person she'd wanted to be. The person she was. Penny Osborn was gone – or, more accurately, she'd never existed in the first place. She'd just been a wish. A memory of what could've never been to Penny Parker.

She nearly jumped out of her skin when the next song that came on was You Make Loving Fun, not the song Only Over You like she'd expected. Apparently, JARVIS had decided to play the Greatest Hits album, and not Mirage. She shot a glare at the radio, since she knew he had to have a camera somewhere in there.

They were so going to be talking about this later.

"Everything alright, Spidey?" Tony asked, glancing over at her.

Her face went back to feeling like it was on fire. "Yes."

He didn't say anything more on the matter, seeming to take her at her word. A small mercy, compared to everything else going on in her life.

Tony parked the car in the underground garage of the building the restaurant was in, since it was a high-rise. They stepped into another elevator, with him pressing the button for the fortieth floor. Penny was anxious that somebody else was going to want the elevator while it went up, stopping it, and that they were going to see her with the Avengers and think, is she Spider-Woman?

But, thankfully, none of that happened. They were able to get all the way up to the restaurant floor without any hassle.

The restaurant was polished, sleek, and high-class, although it occurred to her she shouldn't have expected anything less. There was an alpha man waiting for them at the hostess area, who gave a wide grin at the sight of them. "Bonne soirée," he greeted them all. "You would be my Potts reservation, yes?"

"You know it, Rafael," Tony replied. It seemed he and the man were friends, as they shook hands and grinned at each other. "Thanks for this, by the way. It means a lot."

"Of course it does. Literally, and metaphorically," Rafael laughed in returned. He observed the rest of them with watchful eyes. "Captain Rogers, it's good to meet you." He shook the captain's hand, and did the same with the other two men. "Dr. Banner, Mr. Barton. Ms. Romanoff, you are even more terrifying in person." That seemed to be the compliment to give her, as Natasha gave him what Penny was pretty sure was a genuine smile. Or maybe – probably – she was just imagining things.

Then Rafael's eyes landed on her. "Enchanté, Miss...?" He held out his hand.

Penny did not immediately say anything. Her eyes flickered from the man in front of her to Tony, disbelief coming over her face, because he couldn't have told him about her, right? Well, actually, now that she thought about, he wouldn't have had to tell him anything at all. Just like with the other people she'd been worried about, her mere presence with them was probably answer enough to who she was.

Shit. She was so fucking stupid.

Shit, shit, shit...

Rafael cleared his throat. "Do not worry, mademoiselle," he assured her, his voice low, barely louder than a whisper. "No secrets will get out of my restaurant. Anthony is a family friend, and even if he wasn't, I willingly signed an NDA with him for tonight. I am your host, and I will be your waiter. The chefs have been ordered not to come out of the kitchen. I am the only person who will see you, and I will not divulge to anyone your identity."

His heartbeat remained steady as he spoke. He wasn't lying.

In for a penny, in for a pound, she reluctantly thought. Pun not intended.

"You may call me Delilah," she said. "But...I am who you think I am."

He smiled. "Enchanté then, Delilah." Grasping her hand, he leaned down and brought it to his lips, surprising her. "Please, follow me."

Rafael did not bring them too far into his restaurant. He led them to a wide half-booth, half-table near the bar, with two table seats. There was a beautiful view of the city from the windows nearby, but they weren't close enough to them to be seen. Certainly not to be photographed.

Penny sat at one of the table seats. Natasha sat down next to her, leading the four men to squabble a little about who was going to slide into the booth first. The other woman gave her a conspiratorial look. "Boys never really grow into men, do they?" she remarked blandly.

"Hey, I take offense to that," Clint protested. He and Bruce wound up being the two in the middle.

"You would."

Rafael took their drink orders. Penny went last as she skimmed through the menu. She wasn't much in the mood for coffee tonight. "I'll have a glass of the rosé," she said.

Clint whistled. "You drink alcohol, Sp – Delilah?" It felt strange to hear her other pseudonym coming from his mouth.

The question made her snort. "I've been over twenty-one since as long as you've known me, Clint," she pointed out as Rafael walked off to get their drinks. "And it's not like I have an average metabolism."

Tony snapped his fingers. "There's an idea: drinking contest between you and Cap."

How was that the first thing that popped into his mind? "Uh..."

"I think," Steve spoke up. He said it to everyone, but his eyes were focused solely on her. "If she's stronger than me, then she can probably drink more than me, too."

She looked down at her menu in response, remaining silent.

The conversation drifted away from her after that, thank God. There were no questions about her using the name Delilah, as they all seemed to understand it was a pseudonym and moved onto other topics instead. Like Clint's sister and her family, or the research Bruce was doing with the Stark Industries R&D department, or what they were going to eat.

"What do you think you're going to get?" Natasha murmured to her quietly.

Penny hummed. "I don't know..."

She knew what she wanted to get, but whether or not her heart could take it...

Rafael came back with their drinks and to get their orders. Penny swirled around the wine in her glass before she took a sip of it, as Harry and Norman had taught her to do, although she wasn't the best of keeping the habit. It was pretty good. Not as good as the Roscato Weasel always got her, but he liked to spoil her.

"And for you, mademoiselle?"

Penny blinked, startling a little at his voice. She looked down at her menu. Took a deep breath.

"I'll have the branzino, please."

He nodded in acknowledgment. "Shall I make it a double?"

"Ye – "

"Make it a triple," Natasha cut over her.

Another blink.

Penny opened her mouth to correct him, but she'd been the last person to order, so he headed off towards the kitchen. She glared at the female alpha. "I can order for myself."

"You were just saying how you have a high metabolism," Natasha quipped back. "You need the food."

JARVIS' words from earlier came back to haunt her.

One day, she was going to stop feeling guilty when he pointed out the truth of her not taking proper care of herself. One day.

In the meantime, she allowed herself to fall back into her pit of memory. The first time she'd eaten branzino had been the first time she'd eaten dinner with Harry and his father at the Tudor apartments. Having been dressed in a navy blue knee-length casual dress, she'd felt a lot like a lamb being led off to slaughter. "Harry, I can't do this."

He'd laughed at her, snuggling up to her into the limo. Yes, a limo. Just another reminder how he'd been so very much rich and she'd been so very much not. "Relax, everything's going to be fine."

"Your father hates me."

"My dad doesn't hate you. He's just very...stoic."

"I'm not the kind of girl he'd want you to date," she'd babbled anyways while she'd wrung her hands nervously. "I mean, I'm not high-class. You heard him yourself, he thinks my hair's a mess. And – "

"I don't care who he'd want me to date. The only person I want to date is you," Harry had retorted, clasping her hand in his. "You're my girl. You give me sunshine on a cloudy day."

That had made her snort. "Does that make me your honey, too?"

He'd grinned cheekily. "You know it."

She hadn't known how to eat the branzino. Harry had had to show her how to cut it, all the while she'd felt kind of peckish because come on, what kind of a person ate a fish with everything from the skin to the eyes intact? "I'm so sorry," he'd said afterwards, when they'd gone into his bedroom. Norman had allowed them to have the door closed, unlike her aunt, and her stomach had twisted at the thought of what he'd thought about their relationship to have done such a thing. "I had no idea that he was going to – "

"It's okay," she'd assured him, sitting on his bed. "The branzino wasn't bad."

He'd gazed at her speculatively. "Really?"

"I mean." She'd shrugged. "Once I got past the grossness of it, it was pretty good. Probably better than caviar."

He'd chucked as he'd sat down next to her, nudging her shoulder with his. "With me, you're definitely going to have to do that too, one day."

"That's okay." She'd booped him on the nose. "I'll do it for you."

(And she didn't like caviar, just for the record. Blegh. Gross.)

" – lah?"

"Huh?"

The rest of the group was staring at her. Clint gave her one of those easy-going smirks. "You do that a lot, don't you? Get lost in your head? Daydream?"

Her throat tightened. "Sorry." She put her hands in her lap. "It's just kind of hard...not to, sometimes."

Steve figured out what was going on like she was an open book. "You were thinking about him, weren't you? Your husband?"

"...Yes," she admitted. She waved a hand. "But, let's not talk about that right now. Maybe later." When I've had more to drink and can bear the pain a little easier.

As if to prove her internal point, she took a sip of her wine.

They kept the rest of their conversation until their food came out light. She found herself laughing a couple of times, mostly at Clint's jokes, much to her surprise. Rafael came and refilled her drink. Two glasses, of course, were not nearly enough to get her drunk, so she didn't really care, although she did request a glass of water with lemon after he'd topped off her glass.

He smiled. "Yes, not a problem."

He made two trips to bring out their food: first came Bruce's (a salad with brisket, a poached egg, and some sort of vinaigrette), Natasha's (the tuna with asparagus on the side), and Clint's (the ribeye). Then came hers, Tony's (the salmon), and Steve's (the prime rib "for two," except similar to her he'd gotten two of it, so it was really more like for four.)

"I'll be back to check on you in a little bit, oui?" he said before he left.

Like the expert that she now was when it came to branzino, Penny dug in to her food. She was no longer grossed out by the skin of the fish, in fact she even liked it now, so she ate it like it was no big deal. The first bite made her mouth water, as it did her eyes. It'd been...too long since she'd last eaten this meal.

When nobody except Bruce was looking at her (and probably Natasha, too, if she was being realistic), she used her napkin to dab at her eyes. Neither of them commented on it.

JARVIS was right in more ways than one. The delicious food, combined with the lull of everyone else conversing, made her able to eat better and more than she had in a long time. Before she knew it, she looked down and realized that she'd eaten almost all of her branzino and, well...she was still kind of hungry.

As if on cue, Natasha let out a sigh. "This is really good," she said. "But I can't possibly eat anymore." Her plate had less than a quarter of food left on it, but still a noticeable amount.

Clint rolled his eyes. "Then just get a takeout box, Nat."

She pointed her fork at him. "I'm not getting a takeout box. Not after the last time I brought one back to our floor."

"I told you I didn't do it."

"Oh, so someone else who miraculously has access to our floor when we're not there did it?"

He ignored the jab. "Then just don't eat the rest of it, Nat. Jeez."

And Penny supposed that she did follow that suggestion, but not in the way he'd probably expected. Because then Natasha turned to look at her, her green eyes glinting. "Do you want the rest of it?" she asked.

"...Um, thanks," Penny replied quickly. She was thankful for the offer, she guessed, but she was not hungry enough to accept it. It felt too weird. "But – "

Natasha didn't let her say anything more, just took her fork and scooped the food onto her plate.

Oh God, this was so mortifying.

Taking her own fork, Penny cautiously stabbed one of the asparagus spears and tried it. It was pretty good: the asparagus and tuna were covered in some sort of ponzu-lemon sauce. She took a bite of the fish next, and found it to be much of the same. So she polished off the rest of the food, which brought her to fullness. She wasn't stuffed, but it seemed her need for calories had been satisfied.

Rafael came around when they were all pretty much finished. "Can I interest any of you in dessert?" he questioned. "We have – "

"Oh, no thanks," groaned Tony. "I ate too much. It was delicious as always, though, Rafe."

"I'm good," said Bruce.

"No, thank you," Penny added then, not giving Natasha a moment to undermine her again.

The rest of the Avengers gave their agreements.

Rafael seemed disappointed, but he didn't let it bother him for long. "Ah, well, maybe next time," he spoke. He winked at them all. "It was a pleasure to meet you all. Especially you, mademoiselle."

Back at the car, she made sure to sit in the back this time. Bruce sat next to her. His presence was comforting to her for the entire ride back to the Tower, making her able to ignore the feeling that she was missing something she really shouldn't have been. Because surely, she couldn't be.

...Right?

Word Count: 3,936

Next Chapter Title: tiny dancer