Disclaimer: Everything belongs to J.K Rowling.

A/N: Howdy readers! We've finally reached the end of summer, just as summer is approaching in real life. Well, I hope y'all enjoy this chapter, cheers!

Chapter 41: The Beginning

-Rowena-

There was only silence, and the faint crackling of flames in the room.

"How do you feel?" I asked, breaking the silence.

The Boy shrugged. "Okay, I guess, considering I'm supposed to fight a dragon in two days."

The Boy was lounging in his armchair, the one which very few people had sat in before, and not a single one of them Gryffindors. Seeing someone sitting there after all that time brought back memories of the last time Hogwarts had decided to send someone to me.

Julia Roberts. Her black hair and face with more acne than Slytheirn had snakes.

She had walked inside the room, unlike the Boy, who had crawled. Instead of needing help to survive a tournament, she had needed help to get bullies off her back. Bullies who insulted and mocked her visage like she couldn't understand a thing.

Helping her had been easy, and I'd felt no qualms about sending her back out, to never reveal myself again.

How the meeting ended though... what I had seen then still stuck in my mind.

I shook my head, the Boy was reading a book I'd given him on plants, a frown on his face.

He was going to fight a dragon in two days, and he was reading about plants.

I resisted the urge to grimace, was I a coldhearted bastard for sending him out in that arena with no help?

Yes. Yes I was, but that was nothing new.

I'd always been a coldhearted bastard, as long as you asked the right person.

Improvise.

That was what I would write, and the Boy would no doubt panic. It was that panic I wanted, he could crumble, or he would perservere.

If he crumbled, he wasn't worth my time. If he perservered, perhaps something could become of him.

Yet the trust in his eyes when he looked at me would stop him. That needed to be removed.

Part of me felt sad a child would have to lose that innocense, but at the same time, I lost my trust far earlier than him.

I stared inside the fireplace, deep in thought.

A thought struck me, like a lighting.

What if he lost his wand?

I cleared my throat, making him raise his gaze to look at me. "Yes?"

"My plan will work," I said clearly. "However, it relies on one thing, something which every part of your studies will rely on."

The Boy nodded slowly, his face scrunched up, trying to figure out the answer. "The Feriollo spell?"

I clenched my hand into a fist behind my back. "No," I said, trying to not let my impatience slip through. "Your wand."

The Boy opened his mouth and closed it.

"What if you lose it?" I asked, and waited for him to answer.

He would never get an answer by his own, I knew it.

But he needed to think for himself, not get every answer served to him on a plate. I knew that too, from experience.

"Try to get it back?"

I rolled my eyes. "Let's say it's destroyed, gone, turned to ash."

The Boy frowned, but I detected a hint of nervousness in him, as if he hadn't seriously considered this dilemma before. "I don't know," he said, his eyes looking at me desperatedly for answers.

I swallowed thickly and looked away. When looking inside those eyes, full of trust for me, I felt like a coldhearted bastard.

"You give up," I said. "You don't fight, you give up and make sure your opponent knows you've given up, okay?"

The Boy raised his eyebrows. "Ahh, yes, I'm sure the dragon will be very understanding."

I gave him a pointed look. "If you give the dragon no reason to attack you, I doubt it will."

He looked at me incredulously. "But I won't be able to win."

"You won't lose either," I pointed out. "Survival is more important than victory, don't you agree?"

-()-

-Harry-

The door flung open to reveal Bellatrix Lestrange.

For several moments, there was complete silence. The two of us only stared at each other.

"Hi Harry!" Bellatrix said happily, taking a step inside the cell. "I'd like you to take a walk with me, please." The convicted mass-murdered fiddled with her wand. "I hope I won't have to use this, that wouldn't be fun, don't you agree?"

I tried to look behind her for any kind of escape, but was left with nothing but corridor. And no fucking wand . . .

"Wholeheartedly," I said dryly, following her out with a resigned, silent scream of frustration.

I walked out the door and stopped abruptly. Just outside, Tonks and Kingsley and another auror were lying unconscious, or worse. I didn't see any blood; that didn't mean much. I swallowed and tried to quench my panic. The elevator to the floor was barricaded by some kind of plant.

"Please try and take one of their wands!" Bellatrix cheered. "I have invented this new spell I want to try! It should work like a charm!"

I clenched my fists and resisted the urge to pick one of the wands up. Who knew what kind of creativity that witch had?

Bellatrix moved with a confidence and assuredness I hadn't seen in many people. Yet I knew that the body concealed a mind which couldn't be whole. Saying that she had a violent proclivity was an understatement. Adding a decade and a half in Azkaban would be a recipe for chaos.

But what was her plan?

Or more like, where was she taking me?

We weren't moving towards the elevator, towards the exit, the opposite, actually.

Bellatrix was humming on some tune I vaguely recognised. "Harry!" she said and turned around. "When we get inside the room, please be a nice and don't run off. That will save us so much time."

I looked at the door we were supposed to enter with a frown. A large 'M' was written on it.

I had never felt this powerless in my life. I felt like a sun which was cold as ice.

Bellatrix opened the door with a wide smile and gestured for me to enter.

That I did and looked around. The room was huge, I couldn't see the ceiling. There were rows upon rows upon rows of racks in the room. Each rack was filled with blue orbs which were glowing eerily in the darkness. It looked like someone hadn't been in here for ages, the amount of cobwebs and dust was almost unfathomable.

"Follow me!" Bellatrix said and skipped along the row.

I remained where I was and contemplated running off. A red light struck me in the leg, causing me to wince with pain.

"Hurry Harry!" she shouted. "I have a surprise for you!"

I walked, slowly as possible, after the death eater and prayed for anyone to notice my absence.

Think Harry! Think! I couldn't rely on others now, I had to find a way myself.

An idea formed in my mind; not a good one, but an idea.

I quickened my step and caught up with Bellatrix.

"Bellatrix," I said casually. "Are you not afraid of being caught?"

She smiled, if it hadn't been for the fact that I knew she was a masochistic sadist, I would have said she was pretty, beautiful even.

Despite her age, and the prolonged time at Azkaban, her face was smooth, void of wrinkles. She looked like a person, which surprised me the most.

Every time I thought of Bellatrix Lestrange, I had pictured someone with skin white as bone and black pools for eyes, like something from a horror movie.

Greengrass' words played in my mind: appearances can be deceiving. The witch in front of me may not look like I thought, but she definitely was what I thought.

"Afraid of being caught?" Bellatrix said and laughed merrily. "No! I hope we meet as many friends as possible!"

"So you can kill them?" I asked.

Bellatrix arched her brow. "No! What do you think I am, a mindless murderer?"

"Yeah, that's exactly what I think you are."

The death eater shook her head. "Well then you're wrong."

"Really?"

She nodded fervently. "I would obviously torture them first, rip off their genitals or something. . ." Bellatrix trailed off, seemingly lost in her mind. "Then I would kill them," she continued. "Using a. . .dildo or something. Wouldn't that be cool?" Bellatrix said, pure joy radiating from her face. "Have you ever seen anyone killed by a dildo before?"

"I…can't say I have, no," I said, not knowing if she was serious or not.

To be completely honest, I didn't know if it was better if she was serious or not.

"Good," Bellatrix said. "Then it will be a learning opportunity for the both of us."

Not yet, I thought to myself. Wait for the right opportunity.

Bellatrix stopped abruptly. "We're here!" she said with a warm smile.

I looked around, this place didn't look any different from the previous hundred metres we'd covered. It was just racks with blue orbs, whatever they were.

Bellatrix pointed to an orb, one which didn't look any different from the others. "Pick it up, Harry, please!" The witch's eyes shone like those of a kicked puppy, she looked like she had never hurt a soul in her life.

Why?" I whispered, trying to stall for time. "What is it?"

"It doesn't matter, Harry. Please just do it so we can get out of here."

"What do you plan to do then? Kill me?"

Bellatrix laughed. "No! Why would I do that? I would return you to your cell, of course. I don't want to undermine our justice system by interfering with your trial."

"Don't you think you should turn yourself in by that logic? You being out of prison is a breach of the justice system," I pointed out.

Bellatrix pouted. "Please take the orb Harry, otherwise I will have to force you and that will ruin the nice mood we have going here."

I glared at her. "I'll do it if-"

A blue spell appeared down the row and was centimetres from striking Bellatrix in the chest. She got up and shield in time and blocked it firmly.

I jumped away from Bellatrix as she tried to grab a hold of my shirt.

Sirius appeared out of the darkness, from beneath my invisibility cloak, wand held high, fixed on his cousin. I had never felt more happy to see him.

Bellatrix tried to send a spell at me, but Sirius blocked that one.

"Hello cousin," he said with a vicious glare. "Leave my godson alone."

Bellatrix looked at him disapprovingly. "I see your manners still haven't improved." She shook her head. "I thought Cissy and I told you, on repeated occasions, to say 'please' when asking for something."

"You did," Sirius responded, his eyes trained on her with focus. Sirius sent another blue bolt at Bellatrix who blocked that one too. "But I've never been a good listener, cousin."

Sirius walked slowly so that he stood between me and her. With his free hand, he reached inside his pocket and extricated something.

A wand!

And not just any wand either, but my own.

I felt cold as I grasped the wood of the wand. Two against one. It could work, but this wasn't Duelling Days.

I started to circle Bellatrix. The joyful warmth in Bellatrix's eyes was gone, now it held a sharp glint, full of focus.

She twitched and I found myself hard pressed by her offensive. The spells kept coming like a tsunami, then I was toppled over and sent flying along the floor.

It felt like I was fighting in mud, like I had lost my ability to move, like I couldn't breathe.

Sirius and Bellatrix fought ferousiously down the corridor. The spectacle of colour and movement should have been beauty, but I saw none.

I saw them do things I had done every day mere months ago, and been happy about. But now, they looked ugly and cold.

Duelling wasn't art.

I tried to rejoin the fight but I felt like an infant trying to wrestle with adults. I felt like a small candle trying to melt a glacier.

What had happened to me?

Sirius had sweat pouring down his face, so did Bellatrix, yet their movement and their grace never went away.

I flicked spells at her, shielded like I had done many times before, but I was cold and slow and useless.

Sirius and Bellatrix were like dancers, stepping and moving with a deadly precision. I had been like that. . . once.

What had changed? I asked myself in despair as I was inches from being struck by a spell.

Why couldn't I dance anymore?

Because I had lost my dance partner.

In that moment, Sirius shield shattered. Time was frozen for a second. Then Bellatrix cackled and cut his entire wand arm off. The lim dropped to the ground, blood pouring out of the arm, and also Sirius, who fell to the ground with a scream.

Bellatrix turned to me.

My hairs stood on end, I felt like ice.

I didn't get a single opportunity to fire a spell, I could only shield slowly, dodge clumsily and in the end, see my wand fly away to land be her feet.

I gulped. She shook her head, her face full of dissapointment. "We could all have walked out of here she said. No one needed to die, or get hurt."

She conjured something in thin air, I felt like puking when I saw what it was, and when I realised what she was going to do.

"However, my cousin can give us both that opportunity to learn something."

There was a large pool of blood on the floor, more spilling out every second. Sirius was trying to drag himself towards his severed arm, towards his wand.

"Goodbye, cousin," Bellatrix said.

I looked on in horror as the conjured item took on a life on its own and darted down into Sirius chest. Then it remerged, blood splattering. Then it struck again.

And again.

And again.

And again.

And again.

Sirius' body had stopped moving long ago, but Bellatrix was looking at it like it was her birthday.

I wanted to scream, or to cry, or to do anything.

"Now," Bellatrix said. "Please come and pick this orb up for me."

I swallowed and walked over, my legs almost collapsing. Then I saw it lying there, just beside Sirius' body -the invisibility cloak.

The closer I came to the rack and the cloak, the more it felt like I was collapsing.

Think Harry! Think!

I stopped abruptly.

A thought had come to me.

My master would be embarrased by what I had done here.

I stopped shivering from the cold, I stopped shaking.

I picked the orb up confidently.

"So what is it?" I asked, turning around.

Bellatrix held her hand out. "Perhaps it's better if you don't know," she said.

"Perhaps. . ." I said.

Then I tossed the orb down the aisle and dove for the cloak.

Bellatrix sent a quick glance at me but waved her want to slow the orb's fall down.

It lowered to the ground safely, but by the time she turned around, I was gone.

"Accio invisibility cloak!" she said.

Nothing happened, the cloak didn't move an inch.

I had no idea why, but I thanked whoever had created it.

I began slowly walking away, towards the exit. I froze in my track.

What was I doing? She had killed Sirius, and gotten the orb. How could I let her leave?

It felt like something broke inside of me. My hands started shaking, it felt like I would burst.

Bellatrix had picked the orb up and was observing it for signs of any damage.

My eyes settled on my wand lying on the ground. I slowly walked towards it.

With every step I took, images flashed in front of my eyes.

Cedric's body.

Alice's grave.

Sirius.

Alice.

Alice.

Sirius.

My parents.

Alice.

When my hands grasped the handle, it felt like an explosion.

I ripped the cloak of and sent an array of flames at Bellatrix.

I was the sun, and she was melting.

The purple inferno embraced her in a tight hug, but she dispersed the flames.

She sent a spell towards by chest, but I moved away, like I had done so many times before.

Bellatrix tilted her head and looked at me, a small frown on her face.

My hands almost twitched in anticipation, I felt like I could burn the entire ministry down.

She would pay.

"We could both lea-"

I took a quick step to the side and bombarded her with curse after curse.

She blocked and retaliated.

I smiled maliciously, falling into a familiar rhtytm.

"Let's dance," I murmured to myself.

Lightings flashed and the racks collapsed around us, through it all, both of us continued our dance of death.

Bellatrix took a misstep and lost her balance, a purple spell struck her in the chest.

She was sent fying along the floor, weezing and coughing.

I stalked after her, my wand hanging closely by my side. The air was shaking around me, it felt like I was in the middle of a furnace.

I loved it.

Bellatrix got to her feet, shaking slightly.

"You'll regret this," I said. "You'll regret it so much."

Bellatrix didn't answer, she remained silent, her wand held up defensively.

"Ferriollo," I whispered and smiled gleefully as a spell struck her in the back of the head.

Not wasting a second, I attacked her from the front; dancing better than she ever imagined.

In the end, the heat became too much, Bellatrix slipped up, and her wand went sailing through the air, into my hand.

I snapped it in half when I got it, savouring the desperate look in her eyes.

I summoned the orb into my hand, and put it in my pocket. "I told you that you would regret it," I said coldly.

I looked at the witch standing across for me for a long time; observed her breathing and admiring the fear in her eyes, the fear for me. "Crucio," I whispered. The red spell struck her in the chest, she collapsed to the ground, writhing and screaming.

But I didn't see her, I could only see the silver phoenix and Sirius' body. The spell increased and increased i intesnsity.

Then I stopped.

What was I doing?

This wasn't me.

A cold laughter rang through the room. "Good, well done, Harry!" a icy voice said.

From a cloud of black smoke, Voldemort walked out.

I clenched my wand tightly, raised it to point at him.

"I didn't think you had it in you. . . torture," he said softly. "But I must say, it was a good attempt, if it was your first."

I didn't answer him. My mind was scrambling.

"Give me the orb," he said. "And I'll let you walk away."

I snorted. "I know you won't. You want me dead."

Voldermort smiled cruelly. "Not yet," he said. "Not yet."

"Well, it's either the orb and a dead me or neither," I said. "I won't give this to you."

Voldemort raised his eyebrows. "Oh? Do you even know what it is? Are you ready to die for something which could be useless?"

"It's not useless, if you want it."

"Perhaps I only sought this to distract you."

I narrowed my eyes. "The trial."

"The trial," he repeated. "I knew you would never get convicted. . ."

"You can't do anything about it," I said, trying to sound certain.

"I can't do it," he admitted. "But I have. . .contacts. You'd be surprised about how many of your friends are on my side. . ."

"Now, give me the orb." He held his arm out, his tone telling me there was no room for any more chat.

"No," I said. Glaring at him.

I could do it, this was what I had prepared for.

I put the picture of Sirius and Alice, dead, in my mind. Trying to reignite the flame which had burned Bellatrix down.

Only embers came out. Why didn't it work? Why didn't I get angry?

Bellatrix moved on the ground slowly, in agony.

That was my work.

I tortured people.

I was like the person in front of me.

"Accio orb," Voldermort said.

The orb darted from my pocket.

"Bombarda," I shouted. The orb exploded in the air between us.

Voldemort closed his eyes, when he opened them, he was glaring at me. "That was unwise," he said. "Crucio!"

I jumped out of the way.

I heard a door slam open, then footsteps.

"Hello Tom," an old, familiar voice said.

"Dumbledore," Voldermort snarled. Then he took a grip of Bellatrix and they disappeared in a cloud of smoke.

"He's really back," someone whispered.

I realised Dumbledore wasn't the only one in the room. The Minister, several aurors were in there too.

"Yes, Cornelius, he's back," Dumbledore said.

-()-

"Harry Potter, you're cleared of all charges."

The words from the head prosecutor rang in my ears dimly, I barely registered what they said.

Dumbledore put a hand on my shoulders and led me outside. The people in the corridors parted like I was a disease; everyone stared at me with awe and adoration -like I wasn't human, like I was a sun, or a god to be worshipped.

It had only been hours since Voldemort and Bellatrix had escaped the ministry, but word had travelled faster than the wind.

I was the chosen one.

Harry Potter, a boy just turned sixteen, had defeated one of Voldemort's best.

None of them knew how I had defeated her.

None of them had seen Bellatrix writhe in pain or scream as if I ripped her skin off.

I could still taste the bitterness of the words on my tongue. I felt dirty, but I knew that I would never be able to clean myself.

"Let's get back to Hogwarts," Dumbledore said and led me towards the floo.

Umbridge had been sent to Azkaban, that was the only good thing to come out of the day.

Sirius was dead.

What I hated the most was the fact that I wasn't even surprised. Part of me felt prepared for it; somewhere, deep inside of me, I had expected him to die.

Was I growing used to people dying?

The green flames flashed in front of me as I muttered, "Hogwarts."

Dumbledore sat down in his office chair, a tired sigh excaping him. He rubbed his face, his blackened hand making me wince in pain. "I'm sorry Harry," he said.

I swallowed. "Where were you?" I whispered. "How did Bellatrix get in? Why did it take so long for you to find me?"

"They stalled," he said. "They brought out witness after witness after witness to defend her." Dumbledore closed his eyes, regret written in his face. "When they brought out a muggle Umbridge had met on the street four years ago, I realised what was going on, and sent someone to make sure you were okay."

"And then you realised I was gone and went to find me," I surmised.

Dumbledore shook his head. "Not quite. Before my man could return, alarms that there had been a break in at Azkaban. Apparently, Sirius Black had gone there to bring his friends out of prison. That was when I was sure what was going on, I took a couple of aurors and went to search for you." He paused for a moment. "Tonks and Kingsley will survive," he said. "None of them had any memory of what happened. I think that Tom's plan was for no one to know that the whole thing ever happened. If you had given Bellatrix the orb, I think she would have obliviated you, and put you back in the cell."

"Perhaps that would have been for the better."

Dumbledore didn't say anything, his eyes only looked down on me, filled with sympathy.

"Sirius wouldn't have died, then," I continued.

"Sirius would never have allowed her to obliviate you, there wasn't a scenario when he wouldn't have taken the cloak of to fight."

"Then you shouldn't have put him under there," I said numbly. "His death is on you," I whispered softly.

Dumbledore blinked. "Yes," he said. "It is something leaders learn to live with in a war."

I scoffed. "Perhaps that's were you've gone wrong? You've learned to live with people dying, so you accept people dying." I clenched my fist. "I don't want to get used to this. I don't want to get used to people dying every day around me. I want to suffer every time someone close to me dies, because then I will fight all the harder to make sure it doesn't happen again."

Dumbledore looked into my eyes. "That is very noble, Harry," he said. "Perhaps you're right about me, but understand, I've been through more wars than you've been through school years." He gulped. "I've lost many friends, many people who put their lives in my hands. Perhaps this is a good thing," he said and held his blackened hand up. "There won't be many more who die because of me."

I shook my head. "How long do you have?" I asked.

"Less than a year," he whispered. "If I rest and don't exert myself, two years."

"You should save yourself," I said. "For when we need you."

Dumbledore smiled sadly. "You need me now," he said. "There are things I have to show you, to teach you, Harry, and those things will need to be done soon."

"I will arrange Sirius' funeral, make sure he get a proper goodbye."

I nodded. "Thank you."

Silence descended on us, heavy and oppressive.

Every time I blinked, I saw flashed of that spell, and Bellatrix writhing and squirming.

I hated what I had done, but what I hated more, was how much I had enjoyed it.

"Sir," I said. "Do you know what happened between me and Bellatrix?"

Dumbledore leaned back. "Yes," he said. "Someone used to cruciatus at her, it was rather obvious."

I gulped. "I'm sorry, sir. It won't-"

"I get it," Dumbledore interrupted. "She killed Sirius, Harry. You were angry, at her and at the world. So you used the spell to make her suffer. I get it." He paused and stared out the window. "I did the same, once, a long time ago." His blue eyes looked inside my own. "But you're better than me, Harry. Because you stopped. I tortured him until he went insane, then. . . then I killed him, so that no one would ever know that Albus Dumbledore tortured." He shook his head. "But you didn't, you realised what you did was wrong and stopped."

Dumbledore smiled sadly.

"I think the fact that you stopped shows more about your character than the fact that you started."

-()-

-Draco-

My hands trembled. I put the spoon down on the table and tried to stop the shaking.

The morning's newspaper was lying beside me. On the front page was a picture, a picture of Potter standing with his wand raised, pointed at a man who was unmistakable.

He-Who-Mus-Not-Be-Named is Back!

The headline seemed to smile at me, as if mocking me with the fact that I was one step closer to being found out.

People would be on their watch now, and if I got caught on my mission, I would be sent to Azkaban.

And my mother would die.

Suddenly, the whole task felt five times more difficult, and five times more dangerous.

I had to complete the task. I had to.

In the process, I would ruin the world for everyone around me. Dumbledore was the only one who could oppose Voldemort, if he fell, Voldemort won.

When he fell, Voldemort would win, I corrected myself.

What happened to 'making Hogwarts a better place'? I asked myself.

One thing didn't exclude the other, I realsed dimly.

I clenched my fists and took the spoon up again.

I would do everything in my power to make Hogwarts great, until I had to do what I had to do.

-()-

-Harry-

I was leaning against the fence of the Burrow, staring out towards the sunset.

It was the evening after Sirius funeral, school would begin in a couple of days.

Not for the first time, I stood and contemplated if it was even worth fighting.

And also not for the first time, I realised quickly that it was worth fighting.

Strangely enough, amidst all the death recently, it felt like I could live. I had survived for this long, why not longer?

My parents died. Alice died. Sirius died. Yet I always lived, so if for nothing else, I could live so that their sacrifice wasn't in vain.

I felt hungry. I wanted to get back to school immediately, I was going to get faster, stronger, smarter and better this year. I was going to do everything that I could to win. I would move mountains or create planets if that was required.

I felt someone come up behind me.

"Are you alright?" the person said, and came to stand beside me, staring out over the sunset.

"Yes," I whispered.

Bill hummed.

"I know that this isn't the time to talk about this, but I felt that I had to," he said. "I just want to ask you, about Fleur and I, how do you feel?"

"I don't," I said. "When I was in the Triwizard Tournament, I hated her so much for hurting me and attacking me." I shrugged. "But now, it feels like nothing compared to everything else which has happened. I don't like her, no, but I don't hate her either."

Bill nodded. "I understand. Just know, I didn't come here to ask for permission or forgiveness or anything, I just wanted to know how you feel about her . . ." He trailed off. "I must ask you though, do you feel any sympathy, for what you did to her?"

I swallowed. "I haven't seen her, since the tournament, so I don't even know what I am supposed to feel sympathetic about."

"Perhaps that's better," Bill said.

"For who?" I wondered. "For me, or for her?"

Bill didn't answer. The sun was close to going below the horizon, only half of the orange remnants still lit up the sky.

Looking at it, I couldn't help but be reminded of the third task -of Delacour turning into a fire-monster.

For the first time since the third task, I was curious. What did Delacour look like now?

A/N: Thanks for reading people! I'd be delighted to hear a word or two about your thoughts!