The Pink Haired Pirate: An Old Norse Saying
Rated: M for language, future mature themes, violence, gore
Warnings: Spoiler alert for Elder Scrolls V: Skyrim
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Being hungover was an understatement. Her head fucking hurt. Along with every single muscle in her body. And so did her retinas, when she opened her eyes. The sun was too fucking bright, and she wished there was a way to extinguish the damn thing for a single moment.
Sakura slammed her hands down, beside her body, feeling the grass beneath her fingers. Then, out of a sudden, a jet of water slammed down her face. She bolted up in surprise.
"I'm going to pulverize whoever did that, SHANAROO!"
She jumped on her feet, looking around, to be met by a grinning Alessio. She saw red, even with her Sharingan deactivated, and the fury inside her body augmented by the pain reached a boiling point. She grabbed him by the leather collar of the cuirass.
"The hell you did that for!?"
Alessio blinked a few times. "You're different when you have a hangover. Please put me down..." He managed to choke out. He could easily feel the anger radiating in waves. Maybe dumping a bucket of cold water on her head was a bad idea.
'You think!?' A small voice yelled in the back of his head.
Sakura's eyes narrowed as she finally recognized him. It was Marcurio's little brother, and the last thing she wanted was to actually hurt him. And indirectly anger him. That damn Imperial.
Why did she even care?!
She let him down with an ungraceful thud, before grasping on her aching head. She sighed, letting her palms glow a seafoam green.
"I'm sorry..."
Alessio got up, brushing the dirt off his cuirass.
"Boss told me to find you. And I did. I found you here, passed out. But you were fine, in a way. You slept like a log and I decided to keep watch until you woke up. He would have killed me if something happened to you."
The information was slowly starting to get to her brain.
"Your brother is going to kill me too if he finds out I somehow, dragged you into my mess. Funny, eh? Our older brothers will kill us." She let out a dry, humorless chuckle. As the healing chakra did its work, she could slowly feel herself relaxing and relieved from pain.
"What the hell did I do last night?"
"I don't know. You ran off with that guy."
That guy. A name started to ring in her head. "Sam. I don't know what has he mixed in that drink but it disabled my mana almost completely. I couldn't burn it away. Where are we?"
Alessio didn't seem to share her worries. He pulled out a map, something which Shisui thought it might come in handy, and pointed on a spot in the low right side of the map. He found it amusing to see the frustration on her face morph into confusion, astonishment, and amazement. All in all, it was a comical reaction.
Her eyes balled. Somehow, in a single night, she has traveled all across the country. From the Imperial City to Leyawin. Close to the Elsweyr border.
"I'll be damned. How did I even get here? And how did you track me down?"
"Oh. My brother helped." Alessio could see the color drain from her face at a rather unhealthy rate.
"When I told him about you, he said that most likely you did something stupid and has let me borrow Tora, his cat. Did you know he has a talking cat? Kinda cute, this small, brown, black markings. It caught up on your scent instantly, but it doesn't talk much."
Sakura backtracked his words for a few moments. Marcurio knew. Marcurio lent his cat. Marcurio lent Tora. Tora? Madam Shimiji's unfortunate cat? Tora was a nekonin?
So he did sign the cat contract? Ugh, the headache was coming back. She whimpered.
"Easy there with the bombshells. My head can only take so much."
Alessio rolled his eyes. "You're telling me?"
"So your brother knows you ... you know... joined the 'bad guys'?" Sakura asked, getting up. She was handed a flask of water to quench her thirst. Her throat was dryer than the deserts of Alabasta. Or of Suna. Or both, combined
"I don't know. Maybe he made the connection, but I didn't tell him specifically. It's not his duty to be a tattletale, so I think I'm safe from my parents knowing. Shall we go to the Imperial City then?"
To his surprise, she shook her head. "I'm not going back. Not until I find Sam. And my staff. I well damn nearly overworked my liver with that killer brew, so I'm getting the damn staff even if it's the last thing I do." Sakura cracked her knuckles. She noticed that the mask was absent. She must have left it in that tavern.
She stopped, turning around, looking at Alessio. "You don't have to follow me. You can just tell Shisui that I'm fine."
"I don't mind following you. I made an extra durable clone earlier that evening. It's Fredas, we only open the shop around noon."
"Well... if you're sure... but where should I even start...?"
They started to walk away from the tree, and Sakura could briefly remember something. She has been dizzy... and tired... and has leaned against that tree to take a nap. But what has gotten her so tired?
But there was something else. She remembered an underground tunnel. And a cavern. And something big, blue and glowing. Under a statue.
"I remember something. It's kind of like... a sculpture."
"A sculpture? Can you be more specific?" Alessio asked as they walked down the dirt path. There were quite a number of shrines and landmarks all over Cyrodiil; both Aedric and Daedric.
And nobody could forget about the recently restored Old Lucky Lady.
Sakura rubbed her temples, trying to remember. "It was a guy... a creature with pointy ears and pointy horns. Holding a drink. Does that make sense?"
"The Shrine of Sanguine? Huh. That makes sense; you've been drunk the whole time. I wouldn't be surprised if the guy you were talking about was a follower of Sanguine."
"Sanguine? Who's that?"
"Oh, right. I keep forgetting you're not from around here. Sanguine is the Daedric Lord of Debauchery. Basically... any kind of indulgences you can think of." She could think of quite a bunch. "But he's known for playing pranks on people. Like that one time where he sent his champion at a somber dinner party and cast a spell. Everyone got naked and started running around. It must have been fun to watch."
Sakura, instead, was closing her eyes, trying not to think about the whole image shoved in the back of her head against her will. "We have two very different definitions of 'fun', Alessio."
He simply shrugged and followed her down the dirt path.
It wasn't long until her memory started to refresh. Not long at all. At first, she could remember only feelings. She was happy, joyful, and amused. She has never felt that playful in her whole life. The feelings were great and they warmed her heart. Then, she started to remember everything else.
Someone was screaming in the far distance, and Sakura instinctively sped up her pace. Alessio jogged after her.
"Is there something wrong?!" He called out, but she started to run, so he followed her immediately. He almost bumped into her back when Sakura suddenly stopped, staring at a large tree.
"Well, I'll be damned! Again."
"Hey, you there!" Someone yelled. "Get us down!" Several men and women were hanging off the branches of a pine tree. And they looked like its been a while. "Please, get us down!" Someone else yelled, and she has yet to find faces more frightened than those.
"We are sorry we called you a heretic! Just get us down!"
Sakura blinked a few times. "Ah, alright! Just hold on as tight as you can!" Sakura yelled and started to run up the tree. Taking down a man who has been sitting for a while on the pine tree's highest branch.
When they saw her defying the gravity and every law their divines firmly stamped down, they were more than convinced she was an actual heretic. But who knew what could she do if she was angry?
Sakura focused. Soon enough, the farmers would be safe on the ground. And Sakura was doing the hard work, Alessio simply sat down at the base of a tree and rest.
"What were you all doing in that tree?" She found herself asking, completely livid.
Something changed on the face of the farmer. "You don't know?" "She doesn't know!" Someone yelled in the background.
"You and that... and that demon threw us in the tree!"
"Burn the heretic!"
Sakura raised her hands in defense. She took a step back. "Wait a second. I'm not a heretic... did I do all of that?"
The sight has been marvelous. A gigantic pine tree filled with humans instead of baubles and tinsel - the perfect Saturnalia decoration. Her brain started to work the information, and she could briefly remember quite a few details.
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"Oi, Sam!" A totally and outright drunk Sakura called out. Sam was having a drink next to the tree, mildly interested in what the woman was trying to tell him.
But just because she was drunk, that didn't mean she couldn't fight. Far from it - just like her friend and 'eternal rival', Rock Lee. She was a genius in her own right, much like the rest of her brothers slash teammates, so performing a wind jutsu while drunk was not that impossible.
She just had... a shitty aim.
"Mm? What?"
"Look what I can do! I bet you can't!" Her hands moved into hand seals before pressing the palms together. A gust of wind was threatening to burst into a clearing, but a slip of her foot made her fall down on her ass. The wind gale burst through a tree, completely cutting off the branches and leaves.
It left an almost perfect, unnatural, semi-circle.
"Ow... that hurt..."
It wasn't long before Sam started to laugh. And laughed so hard that Sakura joined immediately. She got up, on shaky legs. Sam pushed himself up, walking over, patting her shoulder rather roughly.
Humans were swarming a place, quite a bunch. They 'made camp' near a farmhouse, and they seemed to be quite fervently under the protection of the Vigilantes. Stendarr's worshippers and Daedra haters.
"Hey, Sakura... how do you say we should decorate that tree a bit?"
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Sakura looked up, a little on her left, and the sun was perfectly fitting in the wind-blown semicircle. "Damn... I did good..." she nodded to herself. And looking at the frightened citizens from the outskirts of Leyawiin, she briefly remembered wielding wind to sit them in that tree, like Saturnalia baubles.
A man dropped his pitchfork when Sakura returned her gaze to the small crowd. And he ran inside the house when she chuckled a little to herself.
The others followed him immediately.
"Sakura? What did you do?" Alessio walked over.
"I apparently put them all in the tree."
"Sam told you to?"
"In a way. He suggested it and I guess I thought it was a good idea.." she started to look around, to investigate.
It was just like in the memory, minus the stomped grass by the villagers. A few feet away from the crescent-shaped tree, she found a discarded bottle of wine. She sniffed it and handed it to Alessio.
He took in the scent. "It was purchased here. If you smell it well, you can feel a hint of moon sugar imported from Elsweyr. But it's nothing uncommon." He stated.
"It's not the same beverage as the one we had last night. I guess that being a follower of Sanguine doesn't give you any extra alcohol tolerance." Sakura commented, putting a hand on her hip. Still, she took the bottle with her. One, she'd rather not trash the place and litter around. Two, the bottle might help them identify the seller.
"He could have been just as drunk as you were. Where do you think we should go?"
Sakura thought for a second. "You said this drink was purchased in Leyawiin." She shifted the bottle a bit and checked the paper tag. "I say we should check on the person who sold us this bottle. Maybe they know something about where Sam could have gone."
They nodded to each other.
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A middle-aged man pushed the glasses higher on the bridge of his nose. He was expecting the green, empty wine bottle. With a slight widening of his eyes, he dumped it somewhere behind the counter.
"Where the hell did you two get this from?"
"So you're telling us you're not selling moon sugar wi-" Alessio's hand was immediately clasped on her mouth. She gave him a quick look of surprise, before grunting.
"Hn."
"Let me do the talking." Alessio smiled and walked a little closer to the counter. With a swift movement, the boy grabbed the tie and slammed it right on the counter. It was stabbed and held in place by the pronged kunai.
"Spit it out, old man."
The winery owned chocked a little. "L-Look, kid... yesterday evening, a man in black robes came and purchased my entire stock... I don't know where he came from ... but he paid me in solid gold."
"So our guy is rich and has a drinking problem," Sakura concluded. "Doesn't tell me much. Neither about what happened last night."
Alessio stabbed another dagger into the tie, this time a little closer to the neck. The man gasped.
"I have a feeling you're not telling us everything."
"Fine!" The man cried out. "Fine. Look. He said he needed all the booze for a party. For a 'night to remember'. But he needed one last ingredient... he was very vague..."
When Alessio decided he has had enough, he removed the daggers and pocketed them right away. The man gasped for air. "A party. Remember when I told you something about Sanguine's weird party?"
"Un. When his champion cast a spell and everybody started running around? Naked?" Sakura asked. As they both walked outside the winery.
Alessio nodded. When nobody was looking, he hopped inside the tree and stood up on the tallest branch. Sakura landed immediately behind him. "It happened right here. In Leyawiin." His outstretched hand pointed towards the large, stone castle in the distance.
The imposing structure was easily towering the guard outposts settled all across the county. The green and gold banners of the Leyawiin crest were tattered and blowing wildly in the wind.
"That castle was initially the home of Leyawiin's many counts and countesses. But after the Caro Dynasty has died with the last heir, two hundred years ago, the new proprietors died in mysterious circumstances. Then, a new couple was elected to lead the county." Alessio dramatically paused. "They died soon after. The body of the woman was mutilated in ways you can not describe."
Sakura frowned. "And how do you know all of that?"
Alessio shrugged. "That's what the books said anyways. When your family owns a bookshop, whenever you're bored, you pick up a book to pass the time. It's not like I can throw knives in my room. My mother would have a heart attack for destroying the woodwork."
"That makes sense." Sakura's gaze never broke from the castle. "So the new Count or Countess doesn't live in the castle anymore."
"No. They have a nice manor not very far from this place."
"Do you think I could find my staff in the Leyawiin Castle?"
"Have you lost your marbles?" He was visibly shocked.
"You said yourself it's a legend. Who knows if Sanguine actually planned a weird surprise party in the torture chambers." She was joking, sure... but what if it was true? She mentally shuddered.
Alessio looked at the castle, then at Sakura, then back at the castle. He sighed. "Lead the way, then. But I really do not want to spend my youth in a haunted castle. If I die, I will come back to haunt you."
Sakura stopped for a moment. "If you die, I will join you. Because your brother will most likely strangle me himself." She deadpanned before boosting her legs up and cloaking their bodies with a concealment technique. It would complicate things if they were seen too much, jumping and vanishing out of thin air.
It was already enough that the villagers outside the city might report two 'heretics' to the guards. But it was kind of ironic that they were so far away from the Chapel of Stendarr in Chorrol.
They landed on top of the inner wall of the keep and watched. Two guards were constantly marching around the main gates of the palace. The doors were locked, and almost unbreachable, as the civilians were kept at least an arm-length away. They all knew it was haunted, and they wanted no scoundrel or danger-seeker to meet an untimely death.
It was a punishable offense, meant to keep everyone safe.
"How do you think we should drive the goons away?" Alessio whispered. "Breaking the windows will attract far too much attention to my liking."
"We don't have to break it. But how will we distract the guards for long enough to pick the lock? And without alerting the civilians?"
"Your eyes." Alessio suddenly reminded her. "Boss said that your family can cast pretty strong illusions."
"Do you think it would be wise to put everybody on a range of a few hundred meters or more under a genjutsu?"
"As long as it works. But it doesn't have to be that wide."
Sakura stared at him long and hard for a moment, before taking a step forward to the edge of the wall. She pressed her hands in a Tiger seal and soon, imaginary feathers started to fall from the sky. They were fluffy... and soft... and reminded everyone of those warm, stuffed pillows that awaited them at night. It didn't matter it was daytime, high noon even, and they all had to work, they just slumped against the walls or the floors and fell asleep.
Alessio has fallen asleep as well. Her eyes bled red, and when she poked his forehead, his sleep came to a halt. He shot his eyes open. "Damn, it caught me too. Boss told us about illusions... but not about as soft as this one."
Sakura shook her head. "It's called the Temple of Nirvana. If you manage to see enough feathers, you fall into a deep sleep. But you can break out of it if you recognize the signs... or you feel you might be trapped into an illusion." She jumped off the wall, sliding down carefully, and Alessio followed suit.
She remembered the genjutsu too well, as she drew out a lockpick to work around the lock. It was during the first time she took those damned exams. Everybody fell asleep as the chaos ensued, and few broke out to aid in releasing the others. The lock opened with a rusty click, allowing them to step inside.
"Don't you think you should release the others now?"
"Mm." She put a finger under her chin. "No. I say we should get what we came here for in the first place, and then worry about that. We'll be quick, tho. They can't be woken up the normal means, so we'll have to get back anyways. Come on."
Reluctantly, Alessio followed her deeper in the hallway. The whole place was gigantic, albeit rundown, and the expensive silk tapestries were torn and eaten away. It was dark too. She grabbed a torch out of its cradle and breathed a mouth of fire, lighting it up instantly.
"Nice." Sakura mock-bowed before starting to walk forward. She lit up their path, either oblivious or simply ignoring the sounds of spiders crawling away.
Much like in Mistveil Keep, the main chamber was a gigantic throne room colored in a gray dull stonework. But unlike Jarl Laila's keep, there were no signs of a dining table, bookshelves, or any personal touches. A tattered, fine green cloth was draped over each of the two thrones, one for the count and one for the countess.
Sakura dragged a finger on the armrest, leaving a trail of clean stone through the thick layers of dust and dirt.
"Nothing here, so far. This place is huge." Sakura said. She grinned a little, as her voice produced an echo.
Thisplaceishuge... huge... huge...
Alessio snickered. "Check this out. Help!"
Help... help... help...
"Now, if I were a follower of Sanguine... where would I hide a staff?"
"In a barrel of wine?"
"That's stupid." Sakura deadpanned as they headed for the staircase. "How about a dining room? You know, where dinner parties are usually held?"
"Dinner. Party. You know, Sanguine sent his champion for that reason exactly. To crash a boring, stuck-up dinner party." He explained, looking around.
He jolted out of his skin when the heavy ax slammed out of nowhere from the suit of armor. The blade left a deep crack in the wooden floor which might have cut off his toes if he has been just a little closer.
"Sakura... I think we should walk a little farther away from the walls..." he gulped.
"I... I agree.." She nodded, sighing, walking a little less casual than she did until that point, and far more alert. They were following an endless corridor, careful not to trip over the dull, green carpet. They tried a few doors on the left and on the right, but the doorknobs were so rusty they wouldn't even budge.
"I was expecting this place to be far dirtier, though." Her eyes were activated, just for precaution, trying to sense even the slightest fragments of mana that could lurk among the halls.
"I'm really starting to think that it's haunted, though." He never let go of the dagger, keeping it gripped in his hands.
"The armor could have just been too loose to sustain that ax any longer."
"Yes, and it dropped at the moment we walked beside it."
Sakura shrugged. "There's nobody supposed to be in this castle beside us, right now. I can literally feel no other chakra signatures besides ours." She spoke, rather confident. "Here we are. The dining room."
But the dining room was completely empty. It was cold, dark, and void of any activity, just like it has been in the last two centuries. There was a pile of dusty silver plates on top of the table. A gilded, but equally dirty cart was pushed against the main seat. It was supposed to hold tea, cups, cakes, and fine cutlery.
"No party here. And certainly no staff. Do you even know how that looks like, at least?" Much to his surprise, she shook her head. He groaned. "Damn it."
"How hard could you miss it, anyway? It's a mage staff. It's not like Sam would have disguised it as a broomstick or a mop... right?" She paused. "Right?"
"I don't know. They like messing around with mortals, so I wouldn't be surprised. But that's more of Sheogorath's domain."
"Sheogorath?"
"Later." He dismissed her question. "But so far... there's no staff. Are you sure you don't even know how does that look like? Why didn't Sam give it to you right before you passed out?"
Good question. "I bet he wanted to play a prank on me. To make me work for it more than just a few drinks." She snorted and started to snoop around the dining room. She opened the cupboards, cabinets, both beside the table and in the adjacent kitchen, as Alessio 'kept watch'.
Cough. "Coward." Cough.
"Did you just call me a coward?" He crossed his arms.
"Me? No! I coughed. Can't you see how much dust has gathered in this place?" She coughed again to prove her point, but not before muttering another 'coward' in her fist. Ignoring the bugs which scurried away from the kitchen drawer, Sakura picked up a crumpled piece of paper. She wiped the dust off to decipher the words written with stained ink.
"14th of Last Seed, 3E 433. I can't sleep. I have to cook breakfast tomorrow but I will be tired. Someone keeps yelling." Sakura furrowed her eyebrows. "Cryptic. It seems to have been written by the cook... or one of the castle's cooks. But so far it seems to be nothing related to the staff. It's just an old diary page." She folded it and placed it on the counter.
"The castle is not rumored to be haunted for no reason, Sakura. You see, during their reign, there was a rather suspicious shortage of Argonians in the city. And that says something since Leyawiin is bordering Black Marsh to the east. If an Argonian decided to start a new life in the Imperial Province, nobody would have denied them that right. The Empire prided itself on the diversity it promoted, after all. And it kind of still does. You couldn't afford to turn down an Argonian to help you with rebuilding the city when it was in flames, you know? So it was suspicious that so many Argonians disappeared over time."
"That's... indeed suspicious. And what did the citizens say?"
"They asked the Count, and apparently they left the city without saying anything. Look, I know that something was bullshit because one of those said Argonians have once upon a time been a member of the Thieves Guild. Sometimes before the Oblivion Crisis. And the report regarding his disappearance was not flowered with the propaganda the khajits were bribed to write in their newspaper. They wouldn't have written anything at all, actually. But after so many citizens started questioning around the sudden departure of their friends, the Countess had an interview arranged with one of the journalists."
"Which means that something shadier has been going on, two centuries ago," Sakura concluded, and Alessio simply confirmed it. "Now, we have two options: Get the hell out of here and try to find Sam at the Shrine of Sanguine. Or two, we can get to the bottom of the case and find out what the hell has happened during the Caro Dynasty."
She would obviously let him choose, as they had enough time to hunt Sam down. But the look on Alessio's face said it all. He was no less curious than her to find out why was the castle haunted. "Let's go then."
But as they closed the door of the dining room behind them, nobody noticed the pair of claws swinging and slashing the tapestry, right over the face of a fair-skinned woman and a smile as bright as the sun.
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A/N: Cliffhanger because I'm EVIL! And because I wanted to post something before my story gets buried deeper than it already is. Yes.
The Mystery of Lewaywiin is something completely not canon but completely based on real lore elements from Oblivion. I will allow you to decide what's right and what's invented by me on this very spot.
I kind of want to make the county exploration more fun, and just going around like a tourist and being all nice and cute with everyone... is not that fun. I mean, Sakura is helpful and all, but while she didn't know who she was hanging out with... the Followers of Stendarr knew. Then they kind of decided to play one more prank before hitting the sack, and those pitchfork fighters became Christmas baubles.
Sakura's affinity is a mix of Lighting (Her own), Fire (Her clan), and Water (Her fish ancestry). But remember that the Sharingan is called the 'Copy Wheel Eye', literally. In my own lore modification, Team 7 was a strong family even before the team assignment (Kakashi obviously joined later on). So right now if I made a prequel to all of this shit, the obvious tags would be something like Uchiha!Sakura, Family!Team7, Strong!Team7. Constantly putting their hands together to grow their skills. Sasuke eventually defects the village which leaves an even deeper wound in their team than canon. Then Sakura is caught and that was the last nail in the coffin before Naruto goes to save her ass at Marineford, with three other people.
It's not exactly a spoiler, this is exactly what the last chapter of my original story is about.
And speaking of the original story... her first Jutsu ever shown 'on-screen' is actually the same one used here as well.
*Fūton: Reppūshō
Or simply Wind Release: Gale Palm. It's a C-Rank offensive and supplementary jutsu that can knock or push people back, or can increase your own speed. Nothing too complicated.
Well, I can only hope you will like the tiny non-canon arcs here and there. Her first murder mystery mission was with Marcurio. Now, she has one with Alessio. I wonder if I should continue the tradition with the Motierre siblings and send Sakura and Alessia on a similar adventure as well. It could be fun.
Well... that's it I guess.
Cheers!