well. I'm sorry it's been so long ;; but here it finally is!

Still Love

Commodus escorted me back to the suite. Unfortunately, I once again, had to lean against him for support, as my body was on the verge of absolute collapse. It wasn't just my prickles that were eating away at my attention, but also the fact that I had gotten into a fight, on top of healing Kasey. I had expended a lot of energy in a lot of different ways, and my body was now reminding me that I was still only half-human.

If Commodus tried to speak to me again during that walk, I wouldn't have known. The sole thing I was focusing on was not passing out before we got to the suite. I did not, under any circumstances, want to be unconscious and alone with Commodus.

I barely remember getting into the suite. But I do remember taking a deep breath and stepping inside, since I would have to let go of Commodus and support myself until he left. At the very least, until the door closed.

I'm pretty sure I managed until the door closed, but I couldn't be 100% sure, because after the memory of stepping into the suite again, everything is gone. According to Ellery and Huixing, they found me passed out on the floor, just inside the suite. Huixing managed to wake me enough to help me out of my dress and into something more comfortable. She said she'd even gotten me to take some pain medication before helping me into bed. I remember nothing of it.

I slept through the entire next day. No matter how hard they both tried to get me up to eat, I didn't wake. But I did dream.

Mostly, I dreamt about what Kasey had said. Their words had stirred up a lot of old wounds, old memories, old emotions. Things that I hadn't had time to fully process since I had more pressing issues I could focus on. Now that I was unconscious, of course my brain took this as a very ripe opportunity to finally spring everything on me.

I dreamt of Luke first. In part because of what Kasey had said about us, but also, I think because he'd been on my mind ever since Jason had called. I mean, he was almost always on my mind in some way or another, but he seemed to be more present than usual. It felt a lot more like after he had first died—I couldn't stop thinking about him, in my grief—but with less pain. Though, there was still those aches and pangs in my chest whenever I thought about him. They were just more manageable and less frequent now.

There wasn't really a coherent narrative, other than my confusion over Kasey's words. The way they had talked about me, about us, baffled me. Not many knew of the predicament I was in—Kronos holding my life above Luke's head to keep him line—so maybe it was understandable if they thought we were some kind of…power couple, hellbent on raising Kronos and taking down the gods.

Despite how regal Luke could look, how he commanded attention, both demigod and monster alike, all I ever saw was…Luke.

Cunning, intelligent, stubborn, rough-around-the-edges, Luke. A man who could be cruel to those he viewed as enemies, but incredibly loving and kind to those he held close. A man who was just trying to do better for the demigods he saw be used up and thrown to the wayside by the gods, who was just trying to protect the scared nine-year-old child within him.

Unfortunately, this made it easy to lead him down the wrong path. Lead both of us down the wrong path.

From my perspective, especially now, all I saw were two scared, angry, traumatized kids leading a doomed rebellion filled with other scared, angry, traumatized kids.

My dreams and thoughts shifted, then, to Kasey, themself. I thought about the look on their face when they had been talking about their faith in me—something I felt was wholly misplaced. The nostalgic wistfulness they had when talking about both Luke and me. Based on their backstory, it sounded like they had not participated in the Second Titan War—Triumvirate had found them first.

Did that mean the demigods working within Triumvirate were getting regular updates on Luke's progress with Kronos? What kind of information were they given? Would the emperors really take the time to feed these demigods propaganda? I suppose it wasn't that out of left-field, considering how far and wide their reach was.

I guess I was just confused as to why they had kept hidden during the Second Titan War, and even the Second Giant War. If it was the case that they were going to take their own shot at displacing the Olympians, why would they feed propaganda to the demigods under them about Luke and I? I had to imagine, in the emperors' eyes, we were mere children playing pretend, fighting with wood swords in the backyard.

How had our images mutated so drastically?

There were moments, in these weird fluid dream-like thoughts, where I thought I could see Kasey in the holding cell Commodus had thrown them in. They paced in their white-walled cell, looking pensive. But before I could do much more—though, what I thought I could do in this dream state, I wasn't sure—I was pulled back into the forest of whispers.

This time, it felt distinctly different than the woods in camp. After the Grove had been opened, and the wind chimes placed, the woods felt a lot less foreboding. But the woods I was in now, didn't even feel like the ones at camp. It was darker, and the trees once again felt like they were pressing in on me.

The whispers felt…more solid, somehow. Before, they felt more like apparitions, or ghosts, without corporeal forms. Whispers from the stolen breath of the living. Now, they felt like they were coming from the living—solid and sharp.

Their contents had also changed—they sounded more conspiratorial. Words exchanged quickly and quietly between two people before they had to depart, or someone interrupted them who they didn't want to hear, or during a quick break between spars.

Problem was, I couldn't tell if what Kasey had said was influencing what I was hearing, or if I was hearing the actual words of people out there. Because, mostly, it sounded like they were talking about "she" or "her" being alive. Some, like Kasey, sounded in awe, almost invigorated. Others, scornful and bitter.

Did they really mean me? Was there a substantial and indiscriminate group of demigods who saw me as Kasey did? Whether for better or worse?

I woke to someone shaking me. To my own surprise, I was slow to wake, and groggy. Which is why I didn't immediately reach for one of my knives or grab their hand from my shoulder and twist their fingers back.

When I finally blinked the sleep out of my eyes, and pushed my pin-pricks away, Ellery came into focus.

"Okay, Sleeping Beauty," Ellery said, removing his hand from my shoulder. He was sitting on the edge of the bed, fully dressed. "Time to get up. His royal highness has requested you for an errand."

I sat up, my body feeling heavy with sleep. My mouth felt weird and stagnant. My stomach felt extremely hollow. I was dehydrated.

"What time is it? Where's Huixing?" I asked, looking around the room and trying to expel my drowsiness.

"About five-thirty in the morning." He paused. "Huixing and I are doing chores again this morning," he continued with thinly concealed disdain. "But it sounds like we might be going with you on this…errand."

I looked back at him. "Did you guys find anything last night?" I asked in a low voice.

Ellery stared the wall, looking contemplative. "Maybe. It was pretty easy to give our babysitters the slip. But just keep doing what you're doing; it'll keep the heat off of us."

I scoffed and rolled my eyes as I sat up. "Right. Play dress up and eat fancy food. Real useful."

Ellery frowned, turning his head to look at me. "You got into a fight last night. I'd hardly call that playing dress up."

I jolted. "How did you know?"

"We saw the cuts in the dress," Ellery explained. Oh. Right. "What happened?"

Before I could answer, someone slammed their fist against the door. Ellery turned his head toward it and yelled, "We're coming! Give us ten more minutes."

"I'll tell you later," I muttered, throwing the blankets off me, and going into the bathroom to freshen up before quickly getting dressed.

I strapped my throwing knives to the inside of my jacket, I caught my sword, leaning up against the wall near the door. Part of me was tempted to grab it, because of what Commodus had said to me last night, but what angered me more was that his words were getting to me in the first place. So, out of spite, I left it in the room.

Ellery led me back to the dining room, which had been rearranged once again. This time, though, there was a small table that would fit four, next to a slightly larger table filled with a buffet of breakfast food.

As soon as I saw the food, my stomach growled so loud, I was sure Ellery could've heard it.

"I have to go join Huixing," Ellery said. "Enjoy your breakfast."

"Right," I muttered. "See you."

As Ellery left, I quickly went up to the table and piled my plate with food, and took a seat to dig in.

I wasn't usually this ravenous—a lot of things contributed to my lack of appetite—but I basically shoveled the food down as fast as I could without choking myself: scrambled eggs, bacon, toast with jam, and a muffin on top of all that.

I wondered what "errand" Commodus wanted us for as I drank a whole glass of water in one go. (Being out for a whole day would certainly contribute to how I was feeling, but even back then, I didn't have that much of an appetite.)

I tensed slightly as I heard footsteps from the hall, and quickly set my glass down. Not a moment later, Commodus appeared in his purple robes and laurels. His eyes went straight to me and he smiled. I was suddenly regretting eating so much, so quickly. My prickles began to steadily rise. Always nice while it lasted, my chronic being so quiet. But it was far, far too short a period these days.

A blemmyae dressed in a maid's uniform followed behind Commodus, pushing a small cart with a large, long box on it. When I saw the quiver of arrows next to it, I had a feeling of what might be in the box. My stomach churned again, my pin-pricks reacting, as always, and I reached for my now refilled glass, sipping the water carefully to try and keep from throwing up as Commodus stopped just inside the threshold.

The maid pushed the cart a little further in, bringing it to a stop in front of Commodus before standing back and out of the way silently.

"Good morning," Commodus boomed. "Seirína, I have a present for you."

Why was he calling me that? (I mean, yes, I knew it was a nickname I had procured, but why was he exclusively using that nickname for me?)

When I simply stared at him warily over the rim of my glass, he stepped aside and gestured to the cart the maid had pushed into the dining room.

"Please," he said, despite it not being a request.

I took another drink of water (though, perhaps with how my stomach felt at the moment, that wasn't the best decision), before slowly setting my glass back down on the table. I took my time, pulling my napkin from my lap and dropping it on my empty plate, and then standing.

I didn't take my eyes off Commodus as I made my way around the table going to stand before the box on the cart, willing my prickles to calm down a touch, since nothing had really even happened yet. Before opening the box, I eyed it and the quiver of arrows, reluctantly turning my back to Commodus.

I was almost tempted to check the arrows—make sure he hadn't made them like the sword the emperors had given me when I first joined Triumvirate. But with Commodus's presence looming over me, I stomped down on that curiosity and instead carefully took the lid off the box.

As I had suspected, inside laid a sleek, metallic grey recurve bow. Very much akin to the bow Katniss used in The Hunger Games movie. I wondered if Commodus had purposely done that. Did he even know about those movies? Picturing him watching them was too strange, so I tried to shove those thoughts away and reached to pull the bow from the box.

I hated to admit it, but it was well-made. Whoever had crafted it had to be a child of Apollo, a legacy, or just someone who had been making bows for a lifetime. Not only that, but they were skilled in metal-working, as well. The bow was smooth with no blemishes that I could see or feel. The string looked like it had been woven with Imperial gold, which meant I could use it as a blunt-force weapon if I ran out of arrows.

"Why are you giving this to me?" I asked just as I shifted the bow in my hands, stroking where I might hold it if I were shooting an arrow.

Before Commodus could answer (if he was even going to) though, the bow began folding in on itself and suddenly I was holding a charm bracelet, which I nearly dropped with a yelp. I managed to hold on to it, but was baffled at what had just happened. Items like these were made with some amount of magic. And he was just giving it to me? I didn't even think he liked me. (Which is also why I was having a hard time understanding why he had asked me here. Other than, I suppose, Apollo coming to Indianapolis soon. That just didn't seem like a good enough reason to give me such a gift, though.)

Before I could ask Commodus, again, why he was giving this to me, I felt him step toward me. He wasn't pressed up against me, but he was standing close enough I could feel him, and I instinctively tensed. My chronic pain shot up. My free hand automatically went to one of my daggers before I quashed that impulse and pulled my hand away with great effort.

His arms came around me and he deftly took the bracelet from my hand, slipping it onto my left wrist. Just as quickly as he'd stepped forward, he stepped back, but as he did so, he slipped my black, spiral ring off my right middle finger.

I spun and glared at him. "Hey!" I exclaimed. "Give that back."

I reached for it with my left hand, Commodus holding it away from me with his left hand. Inadvertently, that got me close enough for him to reach up and grasp my right hand in his. I tensed again, my prickles bursting, trying to pull away, but his hand only squeezed mine and he pulled me closer.

I glared up at him, dropping my left hand. He merely smirked down at me.

"Let go of me," I growled.

"Why do you keep this?" he asked, brandishing the ring to me. I tried to reach for it again but he quickly held it away. "It's clearly important to you, but I've heard that this was a gift from your father."

I blinked, my body momentarily going slack at the shock that he knew what that ring was. Was that why he had given me this bow? Had he somehow figured out that it used to be a bow itself?

"Who told you that?" I asked.

Commodus smiled again, his eyes flashing. "You hate him, yet you keep something from him that doesn't even work anymore." He paused. "Why is that?"

I couldn't answer. I didn't even know myself. It was important to me, but in a strange way I couldn't describe. Because it was true, I did hate my father. I had kept the ring because it was an amazing piece of magic, but also to deny a gift from a god, even if that god was your parent, was still the ultimate insult.

Knowing what I knew now, I didn't think Apollo would have done anything if I had rejected his gift. But at the time, I did think he would have.

So why did I keep a defunct piece of metal?

The longer I thought, the longer I had to meet Commodus's piercing gaze, the more I realized something. He was smirking at me but his eyes swirled with that weird intensity that I'd seen from day 1, that I couldn't quite figure out no matter how long I looked. But I was starting to see something familiar, now that I had a chance to really examine it.

"Perhaps," I began quietly, "for the same reason you still love him. Even after what he did to you—his betrayal."

Commodus's face went slack, all color draining from it. His eyes went wide, and for a terrifying moment, I think I saw what Apollo saw, what made Apollo drawn to him. But then the anger returned, his eyes narrowing and going dark.

He spat through his teeth, shoving me away with so much force I stumbled back into the table that'd previously held the bow and still held the quiver of arrows. I caught myself on the edge of the cart, and held my breath, watching Commodus carefully, afraid he might lash out more. My prickles began to steadily rise.

Both of Commodus's hands were now furled into fists at his side, and, knowing his inhuman strength, I found I was suddenly worried he might be crushing my ring.

Commodus didn't fail to notice this. He straightened, some of the dark anger dissipating, and opened his palm to reveal my undamaged ring.

"Would you like this back?" he asked.

I looked at him warily, slowly nodding.

He closed his palm. "Then you'll have to win it back." With his other hand, he pointed to something across the room. "I'd like to see your skills with a bow and arrow."

I pursed my lips, frowning. I had a feeling this had nothing to do with my archery skills—he'd already seen my accuracy—but if I wanted my ring back, I guess I would have to indulge him.

Finally, I turned to see what he was pointing at, and my frown deepened. It was a butler blemmyae, standing against the wall across the dining hall. Despite being monsters, I really did try not to kill them unless they were attacking me. Not to say I always held that standard, just that the older I got, the more I, at least, tried to.

"Well?" Commodus said, breaking me from my thoughts. "I should also probably note that we are on a schedule. I'll be sending you out in a few moments, and if you would like your ring before you leave, you best do as I ask."

I gritted my teeth, forcing myself not throw a glare at him over my shoulder, and instead pulled out an arrow from the quiver lying on the table. I flicked my wrist and the bow spiraled out into my hand with ease. I readied my arrow.

Despite making sure to keep my archery skills sharp and practicing as much as I could, I hadn't actually used a bow and arrow in combat in a while, much preferring my throwing knives. That was most likely because having to carry a bow around was a bit of a hassle, whereas my throwing knives were easier to carry around and conceal.

I aimed for the eye, having figure out it was the fastest way to kill a monster. The blemmyae didn't even have time to be surprise before it crumbled to dust, its butler's uniform hanging off the shaft of my arrow.

I turned back to Commodus, the bow turning back into a bracelet on my wrist, and held out my other hand expectantly. He chuckled, grinning—though I wasn't sure why—and tossed the ring back to me. I caught it easily just as Litersyes walked into the room, scowling. The cut I'd made on his neck last night was still there, which surprised me.

(I really should've thought about taking some pain meds before I left the room this morning. At least I'd had enough foresight to take a bottle of pain meds with me.)

He had a ton of scars, of course, so the fact that he would keep scars didn't surprise me. No, what surprised me was that he'd keep a scar from a failure. I'm sure had Commodus let the fight continue, it would be another victory spoil for him, but in that moment, I'd one-upped him. So, to see him keep a reminder of that just seemed unusual to me for someone who introduced himself as "Reaper of Men."

"Sire," Litersyes said as he entered, not even glancing my way, which I was fine with. "We're ready to leave."

Commodus grinned at me again. "Ready to get some fresh air, Seirína?"

Ah, lads, I did it again! I took a long time to post, wrote a huge chapter, and then had to split it up into two! And, once again, the best breaking point makes it so that this chapter is a lot shorter than the next chapter will be lol

Anyway, I'm terribly sorry that this is so late. I was Going Through it there for a moment. Though like when am I ever not going through it at this point. As ever, thanks to all who have stuck with me (to the end of the line). Your dedicated following is what helps keep me going! ^_^

I somehow brute forced my way into writing this, and I have most of the rest of the act planned out (not written, just planned), so hopefully writing will go a bit smoother *knock on wood* I won't guarantee scheduled updates, and have updated my tags accordingly, but I'm hoping you won't have to wait too terribly long for the next few chapters or so.

BUT I can say I will post the next chapter within the next few days or a week from now since it's already written (and has been copy edited by me, once, so there are probably still typos lol).

As always, I hope you enjoyed! Comments are appreciated ^_^

Thank you for reading,
TheBrightestNight