A/N: I planned on updating last night, but I minor issues with the last part of this chapter. However, here it is and I hope you all like it!

Lots of love,

Anna

o.O.o

Chapter Thirty-Five, An unfortunate truth

I told them everything. We'd settled around the kitchen table in Sheila Bennett's living room — because after her death Bonnie could enter without an invitation — having tea.

It was weird.

It was awkward.

Even with a steaming mug on the granite counter, against which I was leaning, I felt extremely awkward. The entire way back to Mystic Falls silence and nervousness ruled in the car.

I had zigzagged between Bonnie avoiding the conversation of me body-snatching Elena's body (unwillingly but still) and Caroline demanding to know what the fuck had happened.

In a way, I had managed to evade the truth for so long that telling someone without that someone yanking it painfully out of my head, was difficult. Telling Caroline who looked at me with eyes so full of betrayal, was almost physically painful.

"I don't understand," Caroline muttered, frowning into her coffee.

"I don't either," I replied. "I have no idea why this happened or who's the one responsible."

"Grandma said it was me." Bonnie piped up.

"What?"

"It was me," Bonnie echoed again and I stared at her.

My shoulders locked together and my eyes grew wide. For a second the world ground to a still and my hands grew stiff. A yew moon hung in the sky, its waxing gibbous light filtered in through a gap in the curtains and dust motes circled in the air, crisscrossing through the light.

I couldn't breathe, for while I should have considered it before, Bonnie had only started to act strangely towards me that Halloween night. Before that, she hadn't—

Caroline had frozen too and even I could hear her rasping breath as she turned to her dark-skinned friend. "What do you mean, it was you?" She demanded icily, sounding as if her whole world had just collapsed, and a wild tendril of blonde hair escaped her ponytail. "Is this about being a witch? Did you—"

"Magic leaves a trace," Bonnie whispered and sank her teeth into her lower lip. She opened and closed her mouth in a valiant attempt to explain her thoughts before sound finally crossed her lips. "Gran said my magical trace was unmistakably linked to you. So she said it had to have been me— or it would be me who would do this to you. Who would rip you from your world and into mine."

"I don't understand," I stuttered.

"Somehow, in a parallel timeline, I helped Elena. The real Elena—" she whispered, blinking tears from her eyes and I felt my face go stiff and grow hot, "—I saved her by sending her to a parallel world, in a parallel body."

"Me and Elena don't even look alike," I gasped.

We didn't. I'd never been this bloody thin and my skin was paler, I had more of a yellowish undertone. And— God, I knew my original body didn't look much like Elena's, but it was getting more and more difficult to remember what my previous face exactly looked like. It had started to be hard to remember what my friends and family looked like— and with a scowl, I rubbed my fingers over my face.

"No, perhaps not," Bonnie whispered, fiddling with the hem of her borrowed sweater.

"Bonnie, I wasn't even living at the same time." I gasped out, curling my fingers so tightly around the counter edge, that they became numb. "I wasn't born on the same day, I didn't have the same skin or eye color. Honestly, the only things I can think of that we have in common would be our natural brown hair and gender."

"I don't know Elena— Should I even call you that?" She gasped and the edge of the table splintered beneath the assault of her vampiric strength and her shoulders shook. "I don't know why it was you specifically. I just— I can't fix it anymore. I don't think I would even be able to fix it even if I'd been human and— And while it was me at the same time it wasn't!"

"Bonnie, you make no sense." Caroline snapped.

"I don't know how to explain this."

Heat flushed across my cheeks and forehead and I rubbed my hand across the back of my neck to stop the heat from spreading there. "Bonnie, please, try—" I whispered. It was all I could do to not lose my temper and scream. God, I wanted to scream, so badly. I blinked against the furious tears that were gathering there and trembled. "Just please— try and explain, because I want to know. I think I deserve that."

Another sob wrenched itself free from Bonnie's throat and she rubbed her hands over the table.

She gave me a blank look and she cleared her throat. "I don't exactly know what happened— it seems you know more about the timeline that should have been than I do. Anyway, Gran said there is the destiny in which we'd been living before.

It's what should have been our reality, but there is a parallel destiny. The one from which Elena disappeared and you instead appeared. That— right now, is our new reality. Every timeline is bound to the choices we make. Every choice opens up a possible outcome. One small change—"

"Right, one flap of a butterfly's wings in Brazil sets off a tornado in Texas, I get it."

"Well," Caroline haughtily hissed, "I don't. You're saying that there are two destinies?"

"There are an infinite amount of possible destinies, that exist in parallel timelines." Bonnie tried.

"And you can just rip someone out of one and— drop them in another?" I summarized.

Bonnie nodded, drawing her body up, knees tucking beneath her chin, posture stiff. "Yes, but that kind of magic— it's very dark. And the moment it's used that timeline ceases to exist."

"And with you as a vampire, it can't be fixed?"

"Gran said there has never been a case where this kind of magic could be reversed in the first place."

I had known that. Or at least, I'd known this situation had been irreversible and I twirled around, furiously staring outside.

The street lamps were lit, thick grey dusk leaking in through the window, and the sky above was dotted with puffy, murky grey clouds. Every so often the stars would appear, glowing brightly and I tried controlling the anger— the tears, that threatened to break to the surface.

I felt my pulse race and my limbs tremble and I tried distracting myself. "Do you know why—"

"No," she replied softly. "Well, I know Elena was in danger and that my parallel version—"

"This happened in a parallel universe, or did this happen— in the future?" I asked. And fuck, that made even less sense.

"I, yes," she agreed.

"How is that even possible?" Caroline asked. "Do you become a witch again—"

"No," I disagreed, "Bonnie shouldn't even be a vampire— as far as I know."

"Dark magic has consequences," Bonnie explained.

"Do you think this is your punishment?" Caroline asked.

I frowned. "It wasn't some sort of cosmic event that turned you, Bonnie. It was Damon!"

"Yeah," she agreed. "I know. That's not what I mean. What I meant, dark magic like that, when you use it, ill-fortune follows. Basically—" and tears started at that, "—I am cursed."

From the living room, a series of soft bongs from the mantel clock interrupted the silence. I counted. It was four o'clock in the morning. Caroline moved closer to Bonnie, wrapping an arm around her shoulders. "No, you're not."

"No, I am."

"Bonnie, you didn't do this." She remarked.

"No," I agreed slowly, "another version of you did, but you didn't."

I thought about my mother. The woman I would never see again and the anger bubbled up like acid. There was a sudden breathless pause from Bonnie as I turned around and moved forward.

Her eyes had gone wide, green shining brightly in the kitchen light, and I swallowed my furious words. Breathing in and out until I could talk again.

"I need to go!"

"Wha— Elena, where would you go— you can't go to your— to her parents!"

"I know that!" I wheezed, snatching my leather jacket up from the floor. "And I'll be back, I just need a moment— I need a moment to collect myself. I'm sorry! I just— I can't do this right now. If I do, I'll probably say things I'll never be able to take back."

I ignored the sloshing thud of blood rushing to my head and I forced myself out of the kitchen and into the hallway. The lamps were still lit and I struggled with the front door, before stepping outside.

I heard Bonnie call after me, but— I didn't particularly wish to hear what she had to say. Not now, not after what I'd learned. I practically bolted. I was pretty sure the well-timed infusion of adrenaline was the only thing that made my wobbly legs function.

The streets were empty, lit only by a few streetlights, and the stars. There was no moon tonight and I realized how stupid going outside when Mikael was out and about was, but I needed to go. I needed some time to myself. God, I was stupid, wasn't I? How had I never considered Bonnie's hand in all of this?

And worse, she would never be able to fix it. There just wasn't— because alternate timeline human Bonnie had switched me and Elena. This Bonnie wasn't that one. The Bonnie who had done this came from an alternate universe where rules did not apply.

Strolling around town without a real sense of direction, I inhaled loudly when I found myself on the main street. The park was to the right and in the distance, I watched the hands of the clocktower crawl up to half-past four.

Licking my lips, I tucked my hair behind my ears to anchor it against the breeze and set course to the Grill.

The light from a streetlamp oozed over the flapping, faded banner and with each step, some remaining stiffness left my body, but my anger remained, roaring in my ears.

I stumbled inside, the door swinging shut behind me and I was surprised to find it reasonably crowded. I claimed a booth in the back, surrounded by the dim darkness of a barely lit bar and the faint scent of sandalwood mixed with beer. For a long, long while, I stared numbly out of the window. My hands balled into fists and acid churned in my stomach.

I wished I didn't understand why Bonnie would have wanted to help her best friend. I wished I didn't understand. It was much easier to hate someone or stay angry at them when you didn't understand their point of view, but— I did.

I also understood that it wasn't this Bonnie's fault, but— I just needed some time to come to terms with everything. Because, although I thought I would be able to get over it, it was hard not to be angry right now. It was hard to not lash out— finally.

It was hard not to resent Elena Gilbert for all of this.

I wasn't sure how long I sat there, going blissfully unnoticed in my shadowy booth before I felt some semblance of self-control settle in my stomach. A very watery, very low sun had lifted in the sky outside, canopies of sultry light falling in through the tinted windows.

I glanced around, licking my lips, and accidentally met Matt's eyes. He was carrying a tray of what looked like a bottle of Tequila and his expression was difficult to decipher.

If I had to guess, I'd say he was annoyed and felt my cheeks flush. I'd mostly forgotten all about him and the difficult times he'd probably still was going through and I ducked my head, hiding behind my hair. It was a silly idea— of course—

"Erm, morning Elena," he greeted a moment later and I forced a wobbling smile on my lips.

"Hi, Matt."

"Can I get you something?"

I blinked owlishly. "Oh, yes, a coffee and— do you have an omelet?"

"Of course," he nodded.

He was about to turn away from my table when I cleared my throat forcefully. "How have you been doing?"

He made an aggravated at the back of his throat. "How do you think?"

"I— I'm sorry," I finally whispered, remnants of anger flickering to life. "I'm sorry you were hurt. I'm sorry you don't want to be my friend, you don't have to. But just because your life is hard, does not mean mine isn't!" I shook my head, stumbling out of the booth, hot tears blurring my vision. "It was a mistake coming here."

"No, wait—"

"Why?" I asked, wiping my face with my sleeve. "Why should I, Matt? I get that you're hurt, I get it, and like I said it's fine if you don't want me around. I can understand. I asked for space first, it was to be expected, but— don't think I don't hurt too."

"How can you expect me to be okay with you and your vampire friends?" Matt hissed, face red.

"I'm simply handling the cards I've been dealt." I retorted stiffly.

Something in his face changed that I couldn't read and he bit his lower lip hard. "Right, the psycho vampire who wanted to sacrifice you."

"Still not sure why he didn't. I'm sure killing me would have been much easier."

"Don't say that—" he whispered.

"I don't say it to be insensitive, Matt," I remarked softly. "I just don't understand."

"I'm sorry."

"What for?" I answered, stomach twisting.

Matt let out an exasperated sigh. "What you said about Caroline and Tyler— you were right. I know Caroline is not a bad person and that Tyler wasn't at fault but—"

"It was easy for me to have that opinion, Matt," I interrupted him softly and licked my lips. "I'm sorry for forcing my believes on you."

"Do you think we can get past this?"

"You mean as friends?"

He swallowed. "Yeah?"

"Of course," I agreed softly, not sure if I meant it or not. I was so done with playing a role.

"Okay, erm, just— let me get your omelet and coffee, okay?"

I pursed my lips. "Yes, thank you," and settled back into my booth.

I wasn't surprised when Caroline stopped at the Grill for some take-out later. I was on my second coffee, fiddling with a coaster when the door opened and Caroline ventured inside.

I saw through the ruse the minute she stumbled inside, far clumsier than any vampire should, and I curled my hands tightly around my cup of coffee. I watched her eyes flit nervously around as if she didn't know I was there, but the way her eyes widened— wasn't natural.

I met her stare head-on and after a moment, she came up towards me.

"Elena?"

I smiled watery, "Hi Caroline."

"Should I even call you that?"

"It's fine, I've gotten used to it." I shrugged.

"What is your real name?" She asked, sitting down in the booth opposite of me.

I supposed there was no harm in her knowing my real name. There wasn't but— It wasn't really mine anymore, was it? I swallowed. "It doesn't matter anymore, does it?"

"I— won't it make you feel more comfortable?"

"No," I shook my head. "It will only be confusing."

"Oh, I— I probably won't call you by your name, I suppose."

"Why does it matter now?"

Caroline wetted her lips. "Right," she agreed after a few moments of increasingly awkward silence. "I suppose it doesn't."

I felt a twinge of guilt for putting her through so much and exhaled loudly. "Ellen. My name used to be Ellen. Ellen Thomson."

"Ellen— I suppose that's still really close to Elena." She mumbled.

"Suppose," I agreed. I knew that the longer I waited to have this conversation, to talk this out, the more awkward and tangled things would get. Caroline bit her lip and studied my face. After a very long minute, I finally relented. "I'm sorry, I shouldn't have gone running. That was childish of me."

"You were upset."

"Yeah," I agreed, licking my lips, "I guess, I was."

She uncrossed his arms and pushed away from the wall. "I would have been upset too, I'm sure. Bonnie explained all of the magic mojo more in-depth and— I'm sorry— I just don't understand why Elena would be okay with any of this."

I snorted. "Not just okay with it anymore, Caroline, she adapted to my life quite well."

"How do you know? You don't know Elena."

I opened my mouth to toss back a snarky retort, but the words died on my lips. Again, I reminded myself none of this was Caroline's fault. "I saw her— myself a while back. She seemed quite happy with the way things are right now."

"I thought you couldn't swap back?"

"I can't— I couldn't— I don't know. When the vampire device was used I saw from my own eyes."

"Like a premonition?"

"No, I think it happened to Elena while the device happened to us." I answered vaguely. "I think we're still linked. Or that we were— I don't know."

"So you might be able to switch back?" Caroline piped up.

I shrugged. To be honest, I didn't think I could. Every witch I'd spoken to had been adamantly clear about that. More likely, the moment of clarity had something to do with some kind of shared physiological pain. Some kind of shared— anything really—

I pinched the bridge of my nose. A heaviness throbbed behind my eyes, like the onset of a migraine, causing my vision to darken and blur.

Caroline was still talking— I had no idea how people did not notice when I'd stopped listening, but she truly was unaware. Completely unaware and I gave her a small smile.

"We should tell Bonnie and—"

"Caroline," I interrupted her gently, "I get that you want Elena back, but I've had three witches tell me the same thing. Swapping us back isn't possible. And that's okay. I've had months to come to terms with that. The thing I should focus on now is how to get out of this town alive."

"That's why you want to take your SATs earlier?"

"Yes."

"Does that mean that things will get even worse?"

"I don't know Caroline. Many things happened or could happen because of Bonnie being a witch or with Katherine coming to town. I'm not all-knowing and barely anything happened as I thought it would.

I have no idea what might happen, but I certainly don't want to stay around. Most things that happen have something to do with Elena Gilbert and I don't want to be the one responsible when the next terror runs into town."

"You don't have to leave, we can help you."

I smiled and sucked in a deep breath. "Caroline, you don't know me. You don't owe me a thing. It wouldn't be fair on you. Honestly, I just want you to be okay."

"I know you think I don't know you, but I do." She argued softly, tucking a lock of blonde hair behind her ear. "I might be shallow— I know I am, I'm a fucking kiddy pool, but I did notice Elena acting like an entirely different person, and— I liked the change. I liked you. I like you."

"Caroline," I started, wrapping my arms around myself, trying to thwart the chill piercing my chest.

"I mean it."

"So you don't want to bring Elena back?" I asked slowly, frowning.

Caroline's expression became unreadable for a second but then she shrugged. "I don't know. Bonnie seemed to think it was to protect Elena. She too seems to think making this right is practically impossible…"

"Uhu—"

Her shoulders sunk and guilt made her lips purse. "I don't want to endanger either of you."

"But rather me than her?"

"I— no!" She looked a bit lost then. "I don't know. I know that I like you."

"You don't have to—"

"Elena was always more Bonnie's friend and you— you were more mine. I felt more comfortable being myself with you. I don't want to give that up but— I don't know!" She hastily explained and my heart skipped a beat. Lines puckered her forehead when she thought about what to say next and her eyes became large and glassy. "Do you hate me now?"

"No." And I didn't. I felt strangely touched by her confession and a small smile pulled at my lips. "I don't think I could ever really hate you."

"Really?"

"Yes, Caroline."

"Well, good, because there's still Miss Mystic Falls," she decided and my mouth slacked open.

"You're not serious, are you?"

"Of course, I am." Her head cocked to the side. "Are you really not going to join?"

"Not my scene."

"How would you know? You might have fun."

I snorted. "Parading around in those heels doesn't sound like fun to me. Besides, you're perfect for Miss Mystic Falls. I don't see the point."

"You mean that?"

"Yes, Caroline."

I knew she'd come and hug me before she'd even made the conscious decision to lean over the table and curl her arms tightly around my shoulders. It didn't stop me from freezing though. I'd hugged her before, but that had all been in the pretense of being Elena Gilbert.

That hadn't been real and I felt my lower lip quiver. I hadn't been hugged as me in— months and I rested my head on her shoulder.

For a long few minutes, we remained like that, hugging. It was strange how it didn't even really feel awkward. When Caroline drew back, there was a small smile adorning her lips and I couldn't help but return it.

"I promise, your secret is safe with us."

"Thank you," I mumbled and then frowned. "Us?"

"Yeah, I'm sorry—"

I wasn't sure where she came from, but I noticed Bonnie approaching cautiously from the side a moment later. She was wearing a thick, hand-knit turtleneck and a pair of tight-fitting jeans. She looked better than she had when I'd left a few hours prior, although there was still something missing from her eyes.

My anger was still simmering. It was surprising I still felt as if she somehow had betrayed me, but at least it was in no way the burning anger I'd felt before. "An intervention… I should have known."

"I'm sorry," Bonnie tried, "I told Caroline you needed time but—"

"No, no, it's fine. I guess."

I gave her a hesitant smile. I couldn't afford to alienate the only two people who could be my allies, who could be my friends. I had to get over this. By now, I'd gotten over worse. I just needed to survive and find a way out of this town.

Perhaps I could go and stalk my birth father? My real father, that is. I'd held off on doing so since the man who I knew as my father, did not know me as his daughter. It would only hurt me in the long run, but— he was alive in this world. And while I didn't know where my mom was — did she even exist in this reality? I knew my dad wasn't married to her but—

"—Lena?"

"Sorry, lost in thoughts," I smiled awkwardly and waved to the booth opposite me. "Do you want a drink? Are you even supposed to be out yet? Mystic Falls had a burial for you."

"Liz Forbes got that all figured out."

"Oh," I said delicately, "what's the story?"

She flushed. "It's a bit ridiculous. They're saying they identified the wrong body because she was too badly burned. Not entirely sure who they're going to say the body was but—"

"Burned?"

"Who knows, mom thought it would work. After the coroner was done— well no one saw Bonnie. I didn't understand it back then, because I had no idea Bonnie wasn't in the casket, but they didn't want anyone to see her."

I nodded and sucked in a deep breath. "Right." There was no one in the casket because Grayson snatched her out of it. "Burned?"

"Mom's made something up about a fire, I don't know."

"And where have you supposedly been all this time."

"With my mom," Bonnie answered, sounding as if she'd rehearsed it.

"With Abby?"

She nodded. "I'm not sure if I want her in my life yet, but she wants to help."

"That's good then."

"It is," Bonnie agreed awkwardly. "My dad's coming home tonight."

"Oh, that's good?"

"I'll be able to get into my house, so yes, I guess."

"Right—"

Bonnie nodded, twisting her fingers together. "It beats being alone in Gran's home." She muttered. "Did you know she left it to me? I just— I can't be there. I can't feel anything anymore, there's no connection to nature and—"

I didn't know if she looked at me then. I could not bring myself to look at the girl's face. My heart was drumming heavily against my breastbone and I drew in a shuddering breath. "It's, you don't have to explain, Bonnie," I whispered. "If it is too hard to be there then it is hard to be there."

Caroline made an affirmative sound and I shook my head fiercely. I shouldn't hide from this. I should be brave enough to look her in the face and lift my chin to meet her stare.

"I'm sorry for your loss, Bonnie. This— it never should have happened."

Bonnie didn't get to answer. I watched her mouth open and close, but whatever she might have come up with was interrupted by the shrill ringing of my cellphone. I'd never been happier with the little device and made a blind grab for it. However, my happiness was short-lived when I realized Elena's mother was calling.

She did ever so often. Of course, she did.

With a shaky breath, I answered the call, nervously yanking at a loose thread on my sweater. "Hello, mom?"

"Elena, Sweetie," Miranda's voice gasped, "are you all right?"

"Of course, I am," I answered. I'd only gone to a cemetery and fought a mad scientist. Otherwise, fine, just peachy. I pushed the urge to laugh madly down and shifted awkwardly, aware that the two vampires could hear everything that was being said. "Erm, how are you?"

Well, A for effort, I supposed.

"Sweetie, I know you and your father have a lot of unsolved tension. And I know you're upset with him." She tried and I grimaced at the biggest understatement of the year. "And I get that. I understand where you're coming from, Honey." She tried explaining.

"I know you want me back home," I whispered, because, honestly, it was stupidly obvious, "but I can't. I just— I can't!"

"I know," Mirada whispered, sounding sad, "Grayson agreed to stay at the practice for now."

"What?"

"Sweetheart, we need to work through this as a family. Grayson wants that too."

"I can't shoe Gra— dad out of his own home!"

"You won't." She told me briskly. "We're just taking the first steps to work through all of this."

Both Bonnie and Caroline shook their heads. Both did not want me to go back to the Gilberts' residence but— honestly, what choice did I have? I was a minor. Miranda could force me to come home, simply because I wasn't yet old enough to take care of myself. Besides, it would be hypocritical of me to not try and make things work. Things weren't fair to me, but they certainly weren't completely fair to Elena's parents either. I rubbed my fingers along my temples.

"Okay," I agreed after a minute of silence, "I'll come home."

To be continued

A/N: From now on, updates will come on Fridays. Like I've mentioned before, I've most of this story pre-written, or at the very least the chapters have a rough outline, but the groundwork still needs some editing and proofreading. And me and my dyslectic ass are not always so very good at that. Erm, I'd like to apologize beforehand for that...

Anyway, I hope with the amount I have now, I'll be able to keep to a decent update schedule!

As always, I appreciate all of your comments and favorites! Those are motivating me with the writing so much! Just a few of your words can make my whole day!

Thank you for reading and see you next week:)