Walking wasn't exactly what Jess had in mind for today, especially when she was so fried, but her truckie was a gas guzzler. It was cheaper to walk to close places like Naima and Ray's house right now.
There was a part of her that wanted to say no to Naima when she called her earlier that week, asking her to watch the kids today. She wanted to sleep or just veg after her last exam. It didn't go well, she was nearly positive of that, and she'd had another meltdown right after it in the bathroom. She couldn't bring herself to decline the request though. Naima had been so good to her and the kids were super easy to take care of compared to what taking care of her cousins had been like.
Wasn't like she was doing anything else today anyway. Her housemates were all sick of each other and had headed home for the weekend. That meant a quiet house and loneliness for Jess. Spending time with the kids would be way better.
Jess was about to let herself in when Jameelah suddenly appeared at the door.
"Jess!" She squealed, throwing her arms around her.
"Hi!" Jess laughed, half picking up the small girl and spinning her a little. "Didn't think it was that long since we saw each other last!"
"I'm just happy you're here!" Jameelah grinned at her, eyes shining and body practically vibrating with excitement.
Some of the tiredness lifted and Jess said, "Happy to be here! Let's go in and-"
"You can't come inside without the password." Jameelah told her seriously, stepping in the way of the door.
"Umm…is it ' your mommy has to get to work?'"
"Nope!"
"Can I get a hint?"
"It's…related to my favorite song!"
"Oh my goodness…your favorite song…" Jess had to think about that because Jameelah's favorite song changed from week to week. "Frozen…Let it go?"
Jameelah didn't get to answer because Naima came to the door, opening it and smiling at her daughter. "Jamee, let her in and go tidy your room like I asked!"
Jameelah gave Jess a smile that didn't communicate any kind of remorse. If anything Jess got the feeling she was up to something.
"Now. Before you come in, I'm going to be honest," Naima crossed her arms, still smiling a little. "I don't have to work today and I know you tend to have an unpredictable life so surprises could be stressful for you, which is why I'm going to warn you that I know what day it is, and you're getting spoiled whether you like it or not."
Jess blinked at the woman, her mind working slowly to figure out she was talking about.
"Spoiled?...What day it is…wait!" Jess's eyes went big. "How'd you know it was my birthday?! My housemates didn't even know this year!"
Naima grinned, "Jameelah is a very good informant. Now, come inside. She and Emma have been busy getting things ready for your big day."
"Oh my gosh, you guys really didn't have to!" Jess gasped as she followed the woman inside. "I-I don't know what to say!"
"You've worked hard, Jess. The least I can do is make you a birthday dinner and make sure you get a cake," Naima said casually as they entered the small living room and kitchen area. Jameelah and Emma had decorated it rather tastefully with balloons and streamers. "And it was very important to Jamee that you get decorations."
The smell of food filled the air and Jess remembered she hadn't really eaten breakfast today. It was past lunch already.
Speechless, Jess tried not to cry. "I don't know what to say! This is…so awesome and-"
"If you say that you don't deserve it I am going to put an extra helping of dinner on your plate tonight." Naima warned, wrapping an arm around her shoulders and guiding her to sit on a bar stool at the counter where her computer was sitting. "Emma, Mikey and the babies will be out in a minute. The boys also had something for you today. They wanted me to show this to you as soon as you got here."
"Really!?" Jess squeaked softly, completely touched and flustered.
"Yes. Here. Take a look."
Naima played the video and stood back a little as Jess gave it her full and undivided attention. All seven of the Seals on the screen were sitting together in the room she recognized as their sleeping quarters.
They sang happy birthday with a surprising degree of unison and good tuning, finishing off with a jumbled chorus of various well wishes, keep out of troubles, and see you soon.
"Awww!" Jess had her mouth covered with both hands, trying not to cry. "That was the best! I can't believe they did that!"
"Yeah, I don't know. I still think we were a little pitchy."
The unexpected voice of Jason came from close beside Jess, nearly level with her ear.
Jess jumped so violently to the side that she nearly fell off her stool when she tried to turn. An arm blocked her fall, holding her steady while its owner laughed hysterically.
"Y-you- how!?-but-you're!?" Jess spluttered, trying to get her heart back under control as she started disbelievingly into Jason's laughing face and nearly fully relying on him to keep her from collapsing off the stool to the floor. Her wild gaze tracked to the others killing themselves laughing close behind him. The six other scruffy men, Emma, Stella, Mikey, Jameelah and RJ had appeared out of nowhere. Shock dissipated as the reality of what she was looking at clicked into place and Jess exclaimed with growing joy and emotion, "Oh, my gosh! You're-you're all here! HI!"
She tracked back up to Jason who was still keeping her from falling and she repeated with the tiniest of choke in her voice, "H-hi!"
"Hi!" He was still laughing as he pulled her in for a cozy hug that Jess stumbled into with dizzying happiness. "Happy Birthday."
"Thank you!" Jess's voice was wobbly and muffled against him as she hugged him back fiercely. "I can't believe you guys are here! I didn't think you were back for another week or something!"
Chuckling, Jason squeezed a little tighter. "Yeah, it's a good thing you can't keep track of the weeks, kid, or this surprise would have been way harder to pull off!"
"Hey, don't hog her, Jase," Ray scolded and Jess pulled away to see him handing RJ off to Sonny so he could give her a hug next. "Happy Birthday, Jess!"
The man stooped down as he came in for the hug the same way he always did with Jameelah, prompting Jess to wrap her arms around his neck instead of the middle. He lifted her clean off her feet and gave a little spin, crushing her ribs the tiniest bit.
"Hi!" Jess squeaked, "When did you guys get back?!"
She was set on her feet briefly and instantly hauled off the ground again by a huge, burly Texan.
"We got back on Wednesday." Sonny told her, his ridiculously thick beard tickling the side of her head. "And let me tell you, I am excited to have a proper party! I sure missed Naima's baking…and you too, little ocean fearing buddy! Happy Birthday!"
"Thank you!" Jess hid her face in his shoulder for a second to try minimizing the obvious tears starting to leak out.
"Hey! No getting my shirt wet!" He teased lightly, pushing her away gently into the middle of the group now so she could accept the next hugs.
Rubbing her eyes uselessly, Jess slipped her arms around the next one in line with all the remembered compassion and worry she'd had when they'd talked after he'd been hurt.
"Hi, Brock!" She managed, clenching her eyes shut and noting how relieved she was in her gut that his hug was just as bone crushing as the rest, meaning he was truly ok.
"Hey, Jess!" He said with the same mild manner she'd come to expect from him. It soothed her nerves with how quiet the energy around him was. The hug was no less warm or welcoming than the others. "Good to see you! Happy Birthday!"
"My turn!" Trent was already cutting in and lifting her off her feet again and shaking her a little, like a brother who knew only one way to show affection somedays. By rough housing. It seemed funny coming from the team member with some of the most medical expertise. "Arghhh…good to see you! Did you see that new Star Wars movie yet?"
Jess shook her head into his shoulder, clinging tight for the moment. "Not yet!"
"Good! Now Brock and I have someone else to watch it with!" Trent told her cheerily, "Clay! Catch!"
Almost dizzy now with how much she was spinning around, greeting and getting her lungs crushed with all the hugs, Jess nearly tripped into Clay.
"Careful!" He said as he wrapped her in an equally warm and brotherly embrace as the rest. It happened so fast that Jess didn't have time to worry about Stella thinking it was weird or being upset for whatever unlikely reason. The only reason it might have worried her was that she knew through Emma that things had been a little strained between her and Clay this past deployment.
"Hi!" Jess greeted, "I'm so glad you're all back safe! I still can't believe you're all here !"
"Don't worry, you'll get tired of us quickly!" Clay laughed as he pulled away. Something in the way he searched her face made Jess feel oddly seen and vulnerable. It was like he somehow knew, with just one look, exactly what had been weighing on her these long weeks. "I'm glad we're home too."
Turning to Scott last, Jess had a sudden and brief moment of shyness because for one thing he was harder to read with the amount of facial hair he'd grown and he was stone faced on a good day Second was because she had this sudden and irrational fear he wouldn't want a hug and third, she'd forgotten how friggin big he was. They were all beefy and intimidating in their own right, but they didn't call him Full Metal for nothing. The guy had a presence about him that could raise the little hairs on the back of Jess's neck and it seemed thicker since he'd been away.
"This hug is going to expire in about thirty seconds if you don't hurry up." Metal told her with less growl than usual and there was a smile. He had his arms out.
"Told you to shave, big guy!" Sonny said, "We all tried to tell him it just made him look more like sasquatch but he didn't listen. Don't be scared off by his beard, Jess. He's still the same warm, fuzzy teddy bear."
"I wasn't scared! He just looks different! You all do!" Jess protested, her feet moving instantly as she mock glared at Sonny. With the hesitation faded she trotted forward the few steps into the offered bear hug, slipping her thin arms around him in return with genuine relief. She was enveloped quickly and squished comfortably against the other person. Something about it felt like coming home and Jess clenched her eyes shut, trying to hold on to that feeling because she needed it so badly.
Tension she didn't even know she'd been carrying trickled away more and more with each hug, but it was noticeable to those around her.
"Happy Birthday, kid." Scott told her, not moving too quickly to end the hug. "You better not be crying and getting my shirt wet."
Jess pulled away and wiped her eyes, both laughing and crying as she said, "Nope! Oh my gosh…I'm so glad you guys are home!"
"Alright…this is getting too mushy," Jason announced, winking at Jess. "Let's go out and play some road hockey."
As her dad said it, Emma made eye contact with Jess and grinned knowingly because back at New Years Jess had confided that she never got to play typical sports growing up and had always wanted to.
She'd also commented on how she would have given her right arm to have a family that got together, actually played games and wanted to spend time with all age groups. The example Jess used that day had been road hockey when she and Jameelah teamed up against Mikey and Emma.
"Come on!" Emma laughed, linking her arm through Jess's when she hesitated to move. Ray appeared on her otherside, his palm putting gentle pressure between her shoulder blades as the group started moving outside. Still a little shell shocked and dazed by the whole thing, Jess let herself get moved along, buzzing with happiness and emotions she couldn't identify.
It felt like a dream. Like all the little things she'd wished for as a child were suddenly embodied in this one moment of friends and family that had found her.
Mikey and Sonny were jostling each other and snickering about who was going to beat who out there. RJ, small as he was, appeared to be coming too and he hung off Trent's arm like a koala while the man swung him around. Jameelah skipped between Brock, Clay and Stella, chattering away about how she'd helped with all the decorations and picked the colors. Naima, Jason and Scott took up the rear, talking quietly.
"Alright, let's divide up teams!" Ray called, as they started grabbing road hockey sticks and two nets from the garage, setting them up. "You know the drill, toss your sticks in. Jase. You pick first."
"Yup! Coming!" Jason called back, the last one out of the garage. He'd been picky about his choice of hockey stick. "Hey, Jess, what are you doing? Grab a stick and get out there!"
Jess was hanging back, looking wistfully at the group and rubbing her arms, "I don't know…I'm pretty useless out there when it comes to these kinds of things. I'll probably just get in the way."
"Yeah, that's not gonna fly," Jason picked up a road hockey stick, measuring it against her and adding to the hand that held his own stick before bringing an arm around her shoulders. "If the little guys are playing, you have no excuses. Besides, Emma told me you were pretty good when you and Jameelah teamed up against her and Mikey."
"That was different!" Jess dug her heels in uselessly as he pushed her towards the road full of burly men, confident women and 'scrappy' kids. "I'll be eaten for lunch!"
"Come on, you have ten seconds to start moving those feet before I toss you over my shoulder." Jason warned, still gently wrestling her forward.
"But-"
"Jess is playing for my team! That's my first pick." Jason yelled so everyone could hear.
"I never played sports growing up-" Jess protested harder, as her heels dug deeper into the lawn, partway to the playing nets.
"No time like the present to learn. Come on, now, that's enough of that," Jason told her lightly as he pivoted and hoisted her over his shoulder effortlessly. Jess yelped indignantly.
"Okokok! I'll walk!"
"Nope, you had your chance." Jason told her as he hauled her down to the group and plopped her gently back on her feet between Trent and Scott. "Here. Watch her and make sure she doesn't try to sneak off."
"Jess trying to sneak off?" Trent said, mock surprised. "That would never happen!"
"I don't know what I'm doing!" Jess hissed. "We didn't do stuff like this growing up!"
"Not hard." Scott grunted. "Hit the ball the right direction, try to keep the ball from going in the net. Easy."
"And try not to get clobbered by the scary women folk." A new voice said.
The boys turned around and cheered 'Hey!' as Lisa Davis and Eric Blackburn came up to join them. They looked ready to play.
Ray welcomed them warmly. "You're just in time! Toss in. We're picking teams."
In the end Jess was on a team with Jason, Trent, Sonny, Scott, Naima, Jameelah, while Mikey, Emma, RJ, Stella. Brock, Clay, Lisa, Eric were on Ray's team. Stella volunteered to rangel RJ and keep him from getting hurt while 'playing' until he got bored, then she would take him.
The game was well ordered chaos. One minute the boys were body checking each other, fighting almost viciously for the ball and falling over, the next they eased off to light shoving so that Jameelah or RJ could steal the ball from them.
Namia and Emma and Lisa were beasts. They didn't ease up for anything other than the little guys. Their method was simple. Wait till the guys were locked up in a 'battle' then come in and steal the ball.
Jess mostly hung back and stuck to her own little corner at the start, only actually trying for the ball if it came her way. After about ten minutes of that, Emma came charging through and Jess finally had the guts to try and get the ball from her since that was 'safe' and familiar.
"There you go!" Sonny cheered as Jess and Emma started to tussle. The best part was Jess didn't feel weird making squealing noises as she tried to get the ball because Emma did the exact same thing.
"Get it, Emma!" Lisa cried.
"Go go go!" Jameelah cheered, trying to run in to help and getting scooped up by her dad instead, making her shriek with laughter.
"Annnddd…she's got it!" Trent called from where he was guarding their net, "Get it moving, Jess! There you go!"
Jess was successful and managed to get the ball to Sonny, who got it to Jason, who then got it past Mikey in the net.
Once the initial self-consciousness began to taper off, Jess got more and more into it. She started watching how Naima did things and took to the method of darting in and stealing the ball away during little skirmishes. She never kept it long, but she didn't need to.
By the third time she zipped in, stole it, passed it off and assisted in another goal, the other team started upping their game with her. They were down a player, with RJ and Stella gone to play with bubbles, so the teams were even now.
"Just watch when you sneak up like that," Metal warned her as they waited for the ball to come back down their way. "They're not going to be as nice with little RJ out of here and it's easy to take a stick to the face or shins."
Jess nodded and watched as the caveman took off to body slam Clay out of the way. He missed and the smaller guy danced past him, laughing. Sonny plowed in, locking sticks with Clay and that was Jess's cue to move in too.
Someone blocked her path and Jess tried to dodge around, but found that Eric Blackburn was more agile than he let on.
"We're on to you," The man told her, chuckling when she didn't quite manage to push past.
"Well, shit!" Jess laughed as she was forced further from the little skirmish. "Now what am I supposed to do?"
"Wait for backup," Naima said, appearing beside her. "You go, Jess. I've got this."
Giggling, Jess took the escape that Naima opened up for her and darted in where Sonny, Clay and Lisa were fighting over the ball, sticks clattering and weight getting thrown.
Heart pumping from the tiny jog, Jess suddenly felt short of breath and spots danced in front of her eyes. It felt like a headrush, which she was accustomed to these days, only this was more intense. She slowed, giving a little head jiggle that only made her feel more lighthead. The moment of hesitation in getting too close to the flying limbs while not feeling quite right cost her the ball and Emma got it instead.
"Hey! You ok?" Jason asked, pausing in his pursuit of his daughter.
"Yeah," Jess heard herself saying over the rushing in her ears. Her gut clenched, cramping sharply as if she were getting her period, which was weird because she wasn't due for it yet. "I'm good."
"You sure?" Trent joined in, ignoring the moving ball and studying her stance instead. "You look a little pale there, buddy."
Feeling the weakness in her lungs eased. Jess nodded and waved it off as her body went back to normal and the sharp cramping passed, "Yeah, just got out of breath. I'm good."
To prove it, she stopped the ball when it came flying down the road to their end, flicking back up again to Jason so that he was forced to stop scrutinizing her.
Whether it was because Jess started slowing down and being more careful after her weird little episode, or because it was actually time to wrap things up, the game ended with a tie breaker thirty minutes later. Her team was so close to winning, but Mikey switched out of the net with Brock and got a lucky shot past Trent, ending the game.
"That was great, Jess!" Emma enthused as they helped put the stuff away. "I knew you'd crush it!"
Jess was practically glowing, her cheeks a healthier pink than usual and light shining through her eyes.
"That was so much fun!" She said to Emma.
"And you didn't think you could play." Jason teased, shaking his head at her.
"Thank you for making me," Jess scuffed a toe into her other sneaker, suddenly bashful. "I really wanted to play, but was kinda scared of sucking at it…or something."
"Good at it, bad at it, that ain't the point," Sonny drawled as he carried a net inside. "Point is having fun and working with your team."
"I'm more used to sports you have to be perfect at, alone." Jess confessed.
"Like what?" Emma asked.
"I was in gymnastics for a while when I was younger and some figure skating. Didn't really like it though. My mom really pushed the training for a while. She wanted me to go far with it." Jess grimaced. "That was…a world I wouldn't wish on anyone, at least at my studio. I was so glad to break my ankle!"
"Oh wow!" Emma said, distracting Jess from the hardened expressions of both her dad and Uncle Ray at the mention of her mother. "Yeah, a friend of mine did gymnastics too. She said it gets really crazy what they put their bodies through and the long term damage it has on ligaments if you have a bad coach who pushes things too far too young."
"You know how to do fancy flips, Jess?" Jameelah asked, not picking up on the more serious side of Jess and Emma's conversation.
Jess smiled a little, "I used to."
"Can you do one?!"
"Ummm…" Jess looked torn. "I don't know, Jamee…it's been a really long time."
"Please!?"
"Jameelah," Ray moved to stand next to his daughter, running a gentle hand down the back of her head. "It's Jess's birthday. Let's not pester her to do something she might not want to do."
"But why not? It would be so fun! I wish I could do flips!"
"Leave it alone, Jameelah," Ray said a little more firmly, his brow raising with a warning that the young girl picked up on and respected. "If Jess doesn't want to, she doesn't have to."
Jess caved under those big eyes and she crouched down a minute so they were at eye level.
"Maybe another time, Jamee. I could probably do just one for you, Jamee, if I practiced up a little."
"Really!"
"Sure! But I can't promise it will be that exciting."
"It'll be awesome!" Jameelah assured her.
"Yeah, but for now let's go eat, what do you think, Jamee," Jason suggested, folding his arms and casting a sharp eye to Jess when she rose from the crouch. She swayed slightly and blinked too many times in a row before pinching the bridge of her nose with her eyes closed. "I think your mom said it was nearly time for dinner and I'm sure we're all a little hungry by now."
"Oh! I'm starving!" Jameelah exclaimed, completely missing the fact that the comment was directed at Jess.
He was probably right. She needed food. The head rush was likely from lack of food and that sharp cramping was probably just hunger.
Shaking it off, Jess smiled at Jameelah and said, "Well if you're starving we better not take any more time up! Let's go!"
The meal was warm, cozy and comfortable.
Jess still felt the whole thing surreal, expecting to wake up at any moment and find she'd dreamt it. She hadn't had anyone go through so much effort to celebrate her birthday since she was nine. It just became any other day after that until her friends remembered for her twenty-first last year and they went out drinking at the Bulkhead for the first time.
That had been more panic inducing than anything because, while Sonny, Trent and Scott might not remember at all, it was the first night she saw the team. Jess had run headlong into Scott while in a hurry to get to the washroom for a minute of quiet so she could calm down her senses. She'd split his drink all over him and Sonny, stared at both in shock then uttered something completely unintelligible and fled before they could say anything. She'd been positive they hated her after that. Funny how things had changed.
After dinner, they congregated in the living room and watched a movie. Jameelah got to stay up to watch it, so it was kid friendly and ended up being a disney movie which the guys surprisingly did not protest and seemed to enjoy.
Everything was going smoothly until Jess got up too fast during a bathroom break in the middle of the movie. The other girls decided they needed a pee break and she wanted to go too.
She took three steps and nearly passed out.
The good thing was that she felt it coming.
"Uh oh." Jess murmured, thinking it was loud enough with everyone talking that she could get away with talking to herself. Her vision tunneled in and the blood rushed in her ears, pounding and pulsing into her skull painfully. Blind, she reached out for the edge of the couch to help her sink down to the floor again.
Big, rough hands met hers instead of the couch.
"Wow, easy," Trent sounded far away for a moment as Jess tried to blink the spots from her vision. "Sit…nice and easy. There you go. Just breathe. Tell me what's going on."
"I'm ok." Jess insisted automatically as it passed and she felt things go back to normal, except that sharpness in her gut. That was annoying. She looked at Trent and around at the others earnestly. "Just stood up too fast, that's all. Happens all the time!"
"Did you ever go to a doctor and request the blood work that I suggested?" Naima asked as she rounded the corner and took in the picture of Jess sitting on the floor with Trent and Brock kneeling on either side. The rest were quiet, primed and ready to spring into action if needed.
Jess winced at the reminder of the most recent thing her mother had done and looked sufficiently embarrassed. "I haven't had time to with school...but, I will. I should be fine now."
To prove it, she popped up and slipped off the bathroom in an attempt to salvage her dignity. It had been such a perfect night. She didn't want to ruin it with stupid low blood pressure drama!
No one mentioned it when she came back, but her spot in the pillow pile on the floor had been stolen by Mikey and Ray, so she was forced to tuck between Scott and Emma (who was curled up all cozy like in her dad's arms).
The movie resumed and Jess found that the day was catching up with her as her eyes started slamming shut and exhaustion weighed down on her. Her head nodded twice. Then the third time it bobbed sideways and fell on Scott's shoulder.
"Sorry," Jess mumbled, rubbing her eyes and sitting up straight again. She was so tired all the sudden and the room of people lulled her into a state of feeling safe that she rarely experienced.
Not taking his eyes off the riveting moment on the screen between Anna and Elsa, Scott snagged a large throw pillow from under Sonny's head with one hand, dropped it onto his lap and then with his other hand, he gently grabbed the back of her head and guided it down onto the pillow.
Jess didn't resist the wordless invitation for a more comfortable sleep and curled onto her side.
Jason reached out from the other side, tapped her knees and then nudged Emma, wordlessly indicating for them to rearrange themselves. The girls shifted without protest, each draping their legs across the other as they mirrored each other and took full advantage of being comfy.
She wasn't sure when she fell asleep or how fast, but just before she did Jess felt a hand rest on her head, warm and steady. It was like an anchor point and in Jess's exhausted mind she took it as permission to let go and drift without worrying about tomorrow.
That was the best present anyone could give her.