Paint and Powder
A Star Trek anthology by Andrew Joshua Talon
DISCLAIMER: This is a non-profit fan based work of prose. Star Trek: The Next Generation, Deep Space Nine, Voyager et al are the property of CBS Television, and creation of Gene Roddenberry. Please support the official release.
Set during "Hollow Pursuits", TNG
"Listen Barclay, if you're going to be late, you're going to be on report, got it?" LaForge stated firmly, to the nervous Lieutenant Barclay. The recent transfer from the USS Zhukov stuttered his reply back.
"I-I'm sorry sir, I just-I got a little distracted-"
"I don't need to hear it, Barclay, get to work," LaForge stated, heading off to another part of Main Engineering. Barclay watched him go, and his shoulders slumped. He got to his station, and began scanning through the standard checks for the ship's power systems.
A gentle hand rested on his shoulder, but he still jumped at the contact. He spun around, and gawped at the smiling form of the ship's avatar.
"I-Oh-Enterprise! I-I'm so sorry, I didn't-I d-didn't-!"
"It's all right, Reg," Enterprise said with a smile, patting him on the shoulder in a friendly manner, "I'm not dressing you down."
"Oh," Barclay managed. "Um, so, what is it?"
"I talked to the Zhukov before you transferred over," the avatar said, still smiling warmly, "and she said you had a lot of problems with..." She lowered her voice, "distractions and social situations. Am I right?"
"I..." Barclay's eyes widened and he froze, looking like he was about to panic. Enterprise rapidly shook her head.
"It's all right, Barclay," she murmured, "I keep private things private. I promise. Ship's honor."
"I..." Barclay took a deep breath, and managed to nod, "r-right..."
"It's okay," Enterprise went on. "You're not the first socially awkward crewmember I've ever had aboard. If you'd like? I'm willing to help you."
"You... You would help me?" Barclay asked. Enterprise smiled.
"Of course I would! It's what I'm designed to do," she said gently. "Zhukov did say she tried to help you, but her captain thought she was coddling you."
"That is what he said," Barclay said, darkly.
"But I'm allowed a bit more leeway with how I help my crewmembers," Enterprise said quickly, to keep Barclay's emotions from sinking, "so if you need some help from me? You just have to ask. I can even help you manage your schedule better!"
Barclay looked at the avatar in some surprise.
"You... You'd do that for me?"
"I can do it for an entire planet if necessary, Barclay, come on," Enterprise said with a smile, and a light, friendly poke to his chest, "you know my technical specifications!"
"I..." Barclay nodded quickly, "Y-yes. Yes! I-I would like that. Um, if you're... If you're willing to. Thank you."
"No problem Barclay," Enterprise said, "I need all my engineers to be doing their best."
She flashed away, reappearing at the warp core to help Geordi with an alignment check of the dilithium matrix. The chief engineer looked over at Barclay with a scowl, that he tried to hide as he focused on his work.
"Magnetic constricter alignment checks within zero point zero three five micron for test sequence one," he said, "Enterprise, confirm?"
"Confirmed," Enterprise said, "alignment well within required tolerances."
"Good, proceeding to sequence two," Geordi replied. He sighed and shook his head, "babying the problem officer?" He asked softly.
Enterprise gave Geordi a scowl. One hard and dark enough he felt guilt clench at his chest.
"Some people need different kinds of help than others," Enterprise replied quietly but firmly, "but they're all worthy of being here. Just because they're a little different doesn't make them problem officers."
Geordi sighed.
"I know, but..." Geordi shook his head, "I don't really get him."
"You could always try to," Enterprise suggested.
Geordi grimaced. But at Enterprise's pleading look, he relented.
"All right," he said, "I'll give it a shot."
"All I ask," Enterprise said with a smile.
0730 the next morning, and Enterprise appeared in Barclay's quarters to give him a wake up call. She paused as her sensors revealed he wasn't there. It only took her a moment to find where he was: The holodeck.
Enterprise tried to transfer herself into the program, but she ran into the privacy lock. Which was slightly annoying. She activated the communications system.
"Barclay, this is Enterprise. Please respond," she said.
Nothing.
She frowned. Her sensors revealed Barclay was just fine physically... But still...
"Release privacy lock, log rationale: Potential crew endangerment," she spoke. The program locks on where and what she could see released. She didn't like to do this, and the programs restricted just how much she could override, but it seemed the only way to assist Barclay: As he wanted her to assist him.
She appeared in a verdant glen, a picturesque forest. She looked around curiously, before she found Barclay.
And... Herself. And Counselor Troi. Being very... Busy.
Despite her age, she blushed furiously. She loudly cleared her throat. Barclay looked up with a happy smile... That immediately faded. He looked over at the Enterprise in his arms, who was smiling lovingly up at him.
"Darling~," she crooned, "we're not done yet~."
"Ahhhh... Uhhhh," Barclay tried. He looked back at the "real" Enterprise, who raised an eyebrow. His face slipped into an expression of utter mortification.
"Freeze program," Enterprise said. She waited while Barclay got himself together. He walked up to her, shoulders and head hung low. He couldn't even face her.
"I... I'm so... S-Sorry, I'm so..." He tried. Enterprise then reached down and cupped his chin. She lifted his gaze to hers. Rather than anger, there was just gentle compassion in her eyes.
"It's okay Reg," she said, "I'm sorry for invading your privacy."
"B-B-But I-!" Barclay tried, already panicking. Enterprise then smiled.
"Would you like to know how many erotic holo programs featuring myself there are?" She asked. Barclay gaped at her like a fish out of water.
"How-Why-?"
"At least ten million, five hundred fifty two thousand, four hundred and forty seven," she stated, "and those are just the licensed programs. It's all right. But you shouldn't let it interfere with your real life."
"W-Well... I guess so," Barclay said. He smiled at her. "It... It's easier to talk with you though."
"Because I'm a hologram?" She asked. Barclay shrugged, and Enterprise nodded. "I am... But I'm also a person, Reg. You don't need to be scared of people."
"It's... It's almost impossible not to be," Barclay admitted. "What with everything... Being so-so complicated and-and..." He shook his head, "and you don't know how to manage anything-Or-or what to say... I-I just, I fall apart and..."
"It just takes practice, Barclay," Enterprise said gently, "and someone willing to help. And guess what?" She beamed at him, "that's what I do."
She glanced over the program version of herself and Counselor Troi.
"Though talking to Troi might not hurt," she advised. Barclay went bright red. "Maybe not right away, but she's good at her job."
Enterprise paused.
"She's okay at her job."
She paused again and frowned.
"She's... Anyway, she can probably help!"
"I-I don't know if... I mean," he tried. Enterprise sighed and rested her hands on Barclay's shoulders.
"Reg," she said, "again. Ten million, five hundred fifty two thousand, four hundred and forty seven programs. It's okay." She gave him a small smile. "I'm a little flattered, actually. Most of the erotic programs I have in my own databanks involve Troi or Crusher."
Barclay gaped at her again.
"I... Don't know if that helps," he said.
"Me neither," Enterprise said, "but maybe it would help you to know that you're not the only one with an... Interesting fantasy life. And that I completely understand."
Barclay nodded slowly. Enterprise smiled back.
"Now, get going, or you'll be late for your shift," she said encouragingly.
"R-Right," Barclay managed, heading for the holodeck exit. She watched him go, sighed, and looked over at the frozen program.
"Well... Points for creativity," she murmured, "at least. End program!"
Because of course she'd have porn holonovels made about her.