Creation began on 07-04-23
Creation ended on 07-13-23
Neon Genesis Evangelion
The Living Alchemist: Rarity of Heart
Shinji more than likely surprised Mustang with his ability to keep his face straight while being asked about the three women he met while in Aquroya when he and the Elrics transmuted it into its current state. He had expected to be asked about the Psiren and her escapades, not about who was from his social circle. Still, the mere fact that he kept his expression vacant showed that he wasn't the least bit interested in talking about himself when his results from his actions were able to put smiles on the faces of others.
"…Still, you must have something to say about your…admirers," Mustang says to Shinji in his office. "Why they're interested in you, why they seem to know you a little better than others, that sort of thing."
"Everyone has more than one social life that they keep separate from their work life," Shinji responds. "I am no exception. Why the interest in who they are? They each have someone in their personal life that they know to be waiting for them to return home. If anything, they may just want to ask me to help someone they know who could benefit from my skill set as an alchemist specializing in healing."
"Sounds like bribery."
"Why bribe when it's better to just ask?"
"Fear of refusal, perhaps?"
"So long as I have the means to provide aid and my convictions to persevere, the fear of being refused…is nothing more than a piece in the sum of every fear one has that keeps them from being more than what they can try to be."
"I gotta say, the way you speak sometimes… It sounds like half of what some people say about you is true."
"Oh, really? What do they say about me, these people? What is there to say about me?"
"When you're engaged in conflict, you talk like a completely different person. When either attacking or defending, it's as though you know what will happen before it happens, and you do something to alter the outcome. There are rumors by some that you are like two different people; there's this passive young man that seems to dislike violence with every fiber of his being…and then, there's this other young man that uses violence as a shield against others and risks harm to himself if it means ending the situation in his favor."
"Sounds like someone with a twin brother, except I'm an only child from a pair of people who were questionable in their own lives."
Shinji felt like Mustang was challenging him, testing him, and he wouldn't bend or break in front of this man that was his superior.
-x-
"…Hard to believe that Shinji comes to this place to report on his actions as a State Alchemist," Misato says as she, Asuka, Rei, the Elrics and Nina sat on a bench outside of Central Command. "Do all three of you report in?"
"Yes," Edward replies, "but Shinji more than Al or I. As the oldest, he's the most responsible of whatever it is we do as State Alchemists."
"I still can't believe that you're working in the military under a program," Asuka expresses.
"We…just wanted to do better than what we thought we were capable of doing," Alphonse explained to her. "But Shinji keeps us out of trouble most of the time."
"He's responsible and serious," says Rei, "but he always has a smile."
"His smile is his greatest ability," added Nina. "It's when he has to face people that don't smile that he stops smiling and becomes a different person."
"How different?" Misato asks her. "I mean…how different is Shinji when he stops smiling?"
"He went up against a superior in a mock battle to show his skills…and when he was attacked first," said Al to them, "he made a distraction that caused a lot of the women in the military to admire him a little more than usual…and then he defeated him by disabling him. He was forced into defense, but he turned the tables on the former brigadier general and came out the winner."
"So, he knows how to defend himself and is willing to defend others against any threat," Asuka states. "You three almost make it seem like he turns into a monster whenever provoked."
The Elrics and Nina looked at the redhead like they hadn't the slightest idea of who Shinji was nowadays around Amestris.
"He doesn't actually…turn into a monster," Nina says in response to this suggestion, "but he does have a…what is that word that Pinako uses? 'Tootedty'?"
"Tendency?" Misato suggests.
"Yeah, that's it. Shinji has that where he seems to have a solution before anyone even knows what the problem is."
Rei then looks up at the steps and sees Shinji coming down.
"Here he comes," she informs them.
Shinji reaches the bottom and sees the group sitting on the bench beside the gate.
"You guys waited for me here the whole time I was reporting?" He asks them.
"Mm-hmm," Nina replies and notices that he seems different. "Did you see my dad while you were in there?"
"No…but he is at the next place we need to go. Apparently, he wants to see me."
Misato notices how the Elric brothers had expressions of contempt on their faces; they still had no forgiveness towards this Shou Tucker for his behavior and actions that drove a wedge between them and their need to protect Nina from him.
"What does he want to see you for?" Asuka asks.
"My best guess, since I don't know for certain, is that he wants to know how to make use of my Red Stone research."
"But…don't you have a responsibility to protect how it's used from others that would misuse it?" Misato questions.
"I do. Still, my presence at Alchemy Lab Four is required. The sooner I see him, the sooner I can get over it and walk away."
-x-
The new clone of Shinji was as vacant as the First Child, and barely active because Ritsuko filled his brain with fewer digitized memories than the first iteration had. As he just sat in the Entry Plug as it filled with LCL, the faux-blond woman had her fingers crossed that this version would suffice for SEELE.
"We're ready to begin," a woman informed her.
"Do it," she replied, and a switch was flipped.
The interior of the plug shifted as the synchronization between the clone and the Eva was being established. So far, the stability of the clone was unchanged. If they could keep it stable, they could continue with the program.
"So far, he's stable," a man expressed.
But so far was not perfect.
-x-
It was a rarity for civilians to be around an alchemy lab, but since they were with Shinji and the Elrics, who were State Alchemists, they were exempt from whatever restrictions there were so long as they followed the rules. Of course, it wasn't like there was anything to do around a research and development branch of alchemy, anyway. As Misato noticed around the place, there was a measure of order and tidiness that was noticeable around NERV, but with more of a human element that the paramilitary lacked. This, and the fact that they were above ground instead of underground.
"So, uh…I take it that Shinji has people gunning for his research notes much of the time, huh?" She asks Edward.
"His research notes are impossible to understand due to the way he writes down everything," Edward explains. "Nobody here understands his native language, so that's how he codes everything relating to the proper usage of the Red Stone. Although he made a translated version, it still doesn't make sense to anyone because it doesn't even look like research. It looks more he wrote a fable."
"Isn't that a part of the myriad of ways that you code your work to protect it from the wrong hands?" Asuka questions.
"Yeah, it's a passable method," went Alphonse, "but it kind of makes it harder to take Shinji serious outside of work. Some people aren't sure whether to provoke him into telling them his secrets…or considering him a lost cause to obtain something they want, despite knowing that his alchemical intentions are valuable in the medical field."
"It doesn't seem like he's entirely popular with most people," says Asuka.
"Most of the military or in general?" Ed asks her.
"The military. If he's done nothing but use his alchemy to help the people, it clearly establishes that he has a reputation of being Good Samaritan…or whatever it is that people call you."
"Alchemists," the brothers stated. "Alchemists Be Thou For The People. No matter what stigma we get from people that disapprove of State Alchemists, we still take that to heart."
Meanwhile, Shinji was engaged in verbal combat with Shou Tucker over the research on the Red Stone, something that both surprised and disgusted him when he learned that the Sewing-Life Alchemist had attempted to create his own Red Stone for his chimera research, only to hit a major gap. The chimera he presented in front of Shinji, a traditional version of the classic beast, was a tortured creature barely able to move.
"How depraved are you?" Shinji questions as he takes out a Red Stone from his pouch and performs a transmutation to separate the creatures that made this chimera up, resulting in a young lion cub, a boa constrictor and a lamb. "You keep this up, you're going to lose more credibility than you expect."
"You're not one to talk," Shou retorts. "Your actions have made the State Military lose much of its former power since the Führer retired. My chimera research is nearly shelved due to the old assembly's lack of interest in it, but your Red Stone and Living Transmutation research, they're still gaining favor due to your refinement of the Red Water. How are you the envy of the State Alchemist program when you've barely been affiliated with the State Military for a year?"
Shinji's expression became a frown of deep-seated disgust.
"Is that jealousy burning the alchemy book into ash?" He spoke. "How brutally overdue."
Tucker then raised his right arm up, holding a surgical knife…and Shinji unsheathed his first kunai from his left leg, feeling threatened by the man. It was no surprise that Shinji felt endangered by the Sewing-Life Alchemist, but he still held life to high standard; even if he detested the man for what he did to his family just to maintain his profession, Shinji wouldn't have his death on his conscience when it was better for him to live with his shame and try to atone for his mistakes or pay for them to the fullest extent possible.
"Do you really want to throw down with me, Tucker?" He asks him, letting the snake wrap around his right arm. "We both know it won't end well for either of us."
"It won't end well for you," Tucker states. "We both know who you really are, Living Alchemist. I know what you are. I can let the people know, and they'll lock you away. They'll execute you. They'll make your life a living nightmare…just like you turned my life into a nightmare."
"Is that so? Do you really think you have it in you to reveal to the military everything you know? Everything you think you know?"
"It's your fault Nina was taken from me."
Shinji glared at Tucker; there was no way he was going to let this man repeat his mistakes that caused his separation from his daughter and the Elrics and his own distrust towards him.
"No," he tells the man. "Your current situation with Nina was your own doing. Yours and Basque Grand's. Whether you understand it or not. Whether you can accept it or not, Nina won my admiration towards her with her joyful smile and peaceful spirit, and anyone that so much as tarnishes her smile or dims her spirit will pay a price for doing so…and I will make sure that they know the full extent of my own fury of having been made aware of such unforgivable cruelty. Back off, Shou Tucker, put down the knife…or else there will be repercussions."
The Sewing-Life Alchemist thought about it for a moment, and while he considered attacking the teen and stabbing the life out of him, he saw that fire in his eyes that reminded him of that night he came and took Nina away from him, turned her back to normal and defeated Basque Grand without even breaking a sweat. It was like he was two different people…and he was facing the same man that he saw that night, only he was stronger than he had been that night…and more capable of actions he could only dream of achieving through alchemy.
"How is she?" He asks Shinji as he backs away and sets the knife down.
"Happy," Shinji answers, re-sheathing his kunai as he rises up in front of him. "Happy, smiling…and wonders about you everyday. She barely remembers that day, thinking it was all a dream…but she can't forget some unbearable feeling of grief…every time she thinks about you. If it ever comes to you trying to echo your sin all over again, I would cross whatever lines I felt were necessary to spare her the unimaginable pain that you dealt her. I would spare her that pain again…and again…and again."
Tucker turned away from him, reflecting back to that day the Living, Fullmetal and Building Alchemists returned from their assignment in Youswell, and could only sigh in what little contempt he could muster in front of this young man that might as well have been deemed to have everything…even when he had very little to nothing.
"You can't protect her forever," he tells Shinji, who puts the snake inside a cage and proceeds to pick up the lion cub.
"For as long as I'm alive, I will protect her from you if you persist in your chosen field of expertise," Shinji replies, putting the cub into a separate cage before moving on to the lamb. "I can't have anything done to you for what you did to your wife, but I hold her death on you. Should you ever use people in your research all over again…and every nightmare you think you're going to have of me is going to be nothing more than dreams compared to what I will do to you later on."
Tucker grimaced in fearful thought of what this young man could and would do to him if he ever found out about him using Human Transmutation all over again. Maybe the military wouldn't be able to do much but incarcerate him for his crimes, maybe even execute him, but he did fear what Shinji Ikari would do to him if he ever found out, which was why he stayed clear of engaging such a practice again. The mere thought of Shinji doing to him what he did to his wife and daughter sent a shiver down his spine he couldn't shake off.
"Are you afraid of me?" Shinji asks him.
"I am," he answers him.
"You should be…until there's no longer a reason to be."
Shinji looks down at a table and sees a copy of his Red Stone research notes, noticing that there were a few notes stuck to some of the pages and picked up one of them, seeing that someone wrote how the translations were still sketchy and felt like a story instead of being scientific theories or solutions, signs that his research continued to puzzle people because he used his native language over this nation's own.
"Despite our knowledge of the human body, it always seems as though we still lack in understanding the heart," he tells Tucker as he walks past him. "The heart is our greatest source of strength, our greatest weakness, and all else in between. But when one throws the heart away as though it were nothing more than trash, then how do we deserve to be called people, a person…or human? How do we define ourselves as who we are when we cast aside our morality and humanity?"
As he left, Tucker was left to ponder that question he asked. He didn't have an answer…and wasn't sure if he ever would have one.
-x-
So far, the Shinji Ikari clone lasted for four hours within the Entry Plug without any instabilities present. If he could last for another hour, Ritsuko was confident that they could begin implementation of the new Dummy System. But there was only so much reliance on a clone of someone dead can get you before something happened to show that they were still unstable in one way or another.
"How much longer now?" She asked one of the people keeping track of the time.
"Forty-two minutes to go," a man answers. "How'd you get this one to be stable?"
"Less memories to work with, hopefully lessening the confusion."
Still, it was too soon to ensure that this secondary clone would get them where they wanted to be.
So long as Unit-01 doesn't break this one down, we should be good for now, Ritsuko thought as she counted down the seconds for this synchronization test to end.
-x-
Asuka was really surprised that Shinji would come to a cemetery to leave flowers on the graves of some people he didn't even know. It was something she didn't expect from him due to his estrangement from his father and lack of recollection of his mother, but here they were…and here he was, leaving single white roses on more than twenty different graves.
"Did Ikari-Kun know any of these people?" Rei asked the Elrics.
"No," answered Alphonse, "but he met and apprehended the man that killed them. It was the day we got our pocket watches that we split up for the day and he…found one of the victims. After that, he wanted to find the man responsible and bring him to justice. I don't know why, but he took it personal after he learned that one man killed so many women. After he caught him, he came here to pay his respects. He didn't want any of that hero-worshipping or people throwing themselves at his feet. He actually got over a dozen letters from people associated with the victims, thanking him for finding the killer…and I think he only read less than half of them in one day."
"Twenty-two," they heard Shinji say as he set another rose down on another grave, "and it's not something I normally do, reading letters from people I don't even know. It's not… You ever get one of those letters, just one, and it turns out to be the worst one you ever get from someone that you wish was either different or just out of the picture?"
"In a word," Edward replies, "no."
Of course, Shinji's experience of the sort was just with his father, whose letter was, more or less, insensitive and disheartening. Years of absence, no phone calls, no emails, not even a visit from his old man. And then, out of the blue, one letter, and it didn't give any sense of longing or wanting to mend the estrangement between them. When someone sends you a letter that has a lot of redactions and doesn't really tell you anything due to sensitive information being classified, and only a handwritten word from a man that gives you no straight answer, there doesn't appear to be any indication that the reason he sends you a letter is for a meeting.
"Even though the guy's dead, I'm still a bit haunted by his linger ghost because he wants to live again, feeling that he's entitled to a resurrection, despite knowing the risks and how that line shouldn't be crossed, even for him," Shinji states. "I'd rather him stay that way than waste my time or my life just to bring back a man that has no heart, no integrity or any measures of basic humanity. That's not a parent or even a person, that's a monster among people. That's an abomination wanting to walk in the light while poisoning it with shadows of contempt."
Shinji's right hand tightened into a fist and he composed himself in front of them.
"Sorry," he apologized to them. "Emotions, feelings. I can't turn them off."
He walks away from them.
"I don't blame him for feeling that way about his father," says Misato. "He wasn't really a good person. It's hard to imagine the two being related when one of them was barely around and had few words to say to the other."
"And every time he performed a large transmutation," Al went, "he feels his father's presence, demanding that he bring him back to life, only to be refused. Even if such were possible with Shinji, he knows the risks and won't perform a Human Transmutation to bring back someone when it's better to save someone still alive."
"It's that taboo to try and bring someone back from the dead?" Asuka asks.
Ed sighs and says, "Al and I tried it once. It didn't pan out for us. That's how we met Shinji…and he cleaned up our mess."
Misato looks over at Shinji as he sets down another rose in front of another grave. He really matured in the time he had been here, switching from an Evangelion pilot to this alchemist that worked for a military with a specialty in regeneration of the human body with some knack for combat. But he still demonstrated his humanity and disgust towards conflict and harming others. It put a smile on her face to see him become this young man that was in front of her.
Shinji stopped in front of another grave, different from the others and reads the name engraved upon the marker. This was the grave of Nina's mother. Sometime after the discovery that Shou had used his wife in his attempt to gain his State Alchemist certification, Shinji had the grave established based on what information the military had on what happened to the chimera that died and eventually explained it to Nina that her mother had passed away because of something her father did; he didn't tell her the whole truth, but would tell her when she was older, able to handle it with a stronger understanding.
Until then, just let her be herself and enjoy her life, he thought as traced his left index finger along the engraved letters. Maybe if I had met you earlier, if I knew now what I knew then…maybe I could've saved you, too.
He felt a tiny hand on his shoulder and turned to see Nina, who smiled at him. He smiled back.
"Arrf!" Alexander barked, and then tackled Shinji onto the ground. "Arrf!"
"Eh-heh-heh!" Shinji laughed as he feigned submission. "You crazy wad of fluff!"
-x-
It was a small success, but they had pulled it off. The second clone of the Third Child had lasted five hours in the Entry Plug of their incomplete Eva and managed to setup a new basic model for the new Dummy System. Now, Ritsuko could develop it further with new information based on the thought patterns of the dead boy. Looking at the sedated clone as he lay on the gurney, Ritsuko pondered how limiting his access to limited details to make up for most of the memories she couldn't access…and if something she recently reflected upon was possible if she tried to limit more of his recollection.
The first clone remembered faces, but he couldn't remember their names, she thought as she picked up a syringe full of a muscle relaxant. Can any stretch of one's memory be inherited at the genetic level in a recreated person? Can these clones inherit the memories of the Third Child at the genetic level with existing technology?
But in the end, all that mattered was what SEELE wanted to reach their objective. If this method of exploiting the Third Child failed, if they were convinced to believe their scenario was beyond their reach, anyone that had anything to do with this operation was as good as history. And if they valued their lives more than they valued their beliefs, they would have to move Heaven and Earth in order to ensure that this clone, or the next one…and the one after that…did whatever they needed.
-x-
There seemed to be a growing measure of distrust directed towards the Living Alchemist by the Flame Alchemist. It wasn't something that was unusual, as certain alchemist within the military would have issues with one another. But in this case, it seemed to be mainly due to the Flame Alchemist trying to provoke some sense of suspicion towards the Living Alchemist, only it seemed like the latter had nothing to hide, even if it did seem like he did, causing the former to become more suspicious towards him.
"Maybe you're overthinking it all," Hawkeye tells him as they walk down the hall of HQ, calling it a night. "Why press against someone else, looking for something that may not even be there to begin with?"
"Nobody's perfect," Roy responds, "only human. But Major Ikari…strikes me as someone that has something to hide, and he makes effort to make it look like there is nothing wrong."
"You do understand that if you keep this up, the assembly will likely place you on probation for harassment. Likely court martial if Major Ikari feels you are targeting him based on potential bias and he files a complaint against you."
Although it was possible, it seemed unlikely that Shinji would file a complaint against Roy Mustang based solely on the assumption that the young man had no desire to stir trouble unless pushed too far by anyone…and he was a few months from being a State Alchemist for a whole year, same as the Elrics. He didn't seem to want to jeopardize his position or that of the Elrics', putting up with the senseless allegations until he decided he couldn't any further. And yet, Mustang couldn't help but be suspicious of Shinji when he and the Elrics were accompanied by three women that, despite standing out a mile long, had some connection to the Living Alchemist and could've been exploiting him to learn whatever secrets the State Military had to offer for some foreign nation looking to grab power. If such were possible, he had a duty to his nation to protect it from foreign invaders. But Hawkeye didn't really see the possibility of an attack from the inside by some teenager that decided to join the State Alchemist program and whose profession revolved around healing people instead of harming them; it just didn't add up when people that spoke of the Living Alchemist mostly spoke of him in flying colors and respect towards his unwillingness to cross the line, even against someone that had a gun on them or injured a bystander to the point where they only had moments left to live without medical aid.
Some could view Major Ikari as a stranger with an agenda…but most viewed him as a boon within the military because of his morality and humanity.
"As a soldier, it's one's duty to make the hard choices when defending one's nation," Shinji had once stated to Hawkeye, "but when I made my decision to join the State Alchemist program, it wasn't with the goal to be ready to kill anyone in order to protect the nation. It was with the goal that when push comes to shove, and I was given the order to kill, I would make the choice not to. Capturing, imprisoning, whatever it is that the military chooses to do when it comes to the lesser of two evils, even if it means building a bigger prison, I can live with that choice because I was the one that made it. Nobody asks to be a victim on the verge of death, but nobody asks to die by another's hands unless they directly ask you to put them out of their misery."
Excluding his way with words, it really does seem like he's two different people at times, she considers, but he's right. He's an only child; he has no twin or any other siblings. Maybe it's his personality that changes when engaged. He goes from a war-weary young man that would avoid trouble whenever possible to a confident and in-control combatant that seems to know exactly what to do when the situation warrants it.
"In some cases, just some cases," she remembers her father telling her years ago, "some people will develop traits in their behavior that enables them to cope with situations they normally can't handle being in. Someone who's been timid of dealing with an enemy their whole life will suddenly develop an attitude that allows them to overcome their fear of them, another person that has never learned to swim suddenly acting like swimming is no problem and so on. And sometimes, just sometimes, people's behaviors shift due to some form of trauma they experienced in their past, creating these identities that serve to reinforce or protect themselves against potential harm from others."
Hawkeye had to suspect that Major Ikari was among those that were subjects of trauma and had developed alternate identities that could protect them against new forms of trauma…and maybe the alternate identity was a rare case that coexisted with his own.
To be continued…
A/N: And the plot shifts and twists as time moves on. The next chapter may have the Flame Alchemist going too far against Shinji due to looking around for cracks that aren't exactly there, but trust becoming currency short in people's possession. And as for the new Shinji clone Ritsuko helped create, only time will tell with him and what may or may not happen because he's the result of people using science to mess with nature.