Spectacular Webhead 11: Not telling you yet, but someone who had much more plot potential would've been voted off, but we decided to have Bridgette go instead since her and Tyler are pretty much developed enough.
The Riverian: We touched up on the Commando Zoey scenes and rewrote them to make Zoey less wangsty.
acosta perez jose ramiro: Who wouldn't hate getting poisoned?
LaCuevademisgustos: Leonard and Sam usually get booted out before the merge in the other stories. Gwen didn't have much to offer without Trent or her canonical conflicts and friendships. The best we had is Zoey and even then, she needs to fly solo for once. Alejandro could be better, but given the season runtime, he's had to hide his true nature until it'll blow up in his face.
TSPI 10 (pt 1)
Girls: Jasmine, Zoey
Boys: Alejandro, Leonard, Sam, Tyler
Episode 10: T-Minus Six
"Last episode of Total Drama went down niiiice and eeeasy, one Juggy Chunk at a time," Chris opened, the recap montage beginning immediately with a clip of Zoey drinking a glass of expired Juggy Chunks unenjoyably, followed by Sam happily taking a swig and the camera panning to Bridgette as she watched uneasily, then pinched her nose and began to chug.
"Then it was time-" the montage moved to Leonard and Bridgette looking pale and sickly as they walked through the woods- "for a stomach-turning game of Hurl and Go Seek," Chris finished over clips of Jasmine holding her stomach as it growled painfully, followed by Alejandro and Tyler running into a tree and Sam and Dakota tagging them shortly after, all boys looking sickly and weak.
"And thanks to a little bit of food poisoning," Tyler was shown talking goofily, "and manipulation," Alejandro was talking to Sam and Tyler about the vote, "Tyler helped get Bridgette eliminated unintentionally." The montage ended with Bridgette being blasted into the night.
"Aaaand...that's...about it," Chris added with forced nonchalance, the music suddenly warping as the scene moved to a long-distance shot of the island as various formations and features jolted up and down or were replaced by other things entirely. "Absolutely nothing strange happened!" he added as the camera moved to another part of the island as one of the tall cresting hills suddenly shot into the ground, getting replaced by a more jagged peak. A pine tree was replaced by something deciduous, then storm clouds abruptly formed and thunder cracked. "Just like nothing's happening now!" Chris said defiantly, the music now unrecognizably distorted as the ground began to shake, and a strong and snowy wind blew across the land – carrying a chittering raccoon with it.
"Nope! Nothing to see here!" Chris said with panic in his voice, stepping directly in front of the camera with a worried expression and grabbing the side of it. "Uh, just a regular day," he said, moving the shot a step to the right as snow continued to blow in the background. "Get ready for-" A strong gust of wind suddenly blew him away from the camera, which quickly cut to show him rolling along the ground end-over-end, hitting a tall stump butt-first with his back on the ground. "Total!" he raised a finger and declared in a slightly higher voice. "Drama!" the shot cut outward to show the entire island, the land once more shifting and changing as hills rose and fell, ice spires shot out at odd angles, and the lightning cracked overhead.
The music made a pathetic attempt at resuming its usual course, but only made it a second before distorting again. The camera jumped backward, and Chris hastily finished "Paaaahki-"
XXX
The scene cut to static, which was soon replaced by a static image and calming standby music. The image was largely cream and black, a grid in the background with a large film reel in each of the four corners. And in the center was a color image of Chef Hatchet, a look of alarm on his face as he gazed upon the camera that was in the skillet he was holding over a stove...
XXXXX
The scene opened on a long-distance shot of the stormy island, lightning cracking and the ground shaking. The shot cut to the Final Six gathered next to Chris, the host still wedged on his back up against the tall stump.
"It's an earthquake!" Jasmine shouted in panic.
"No," Zoey corrected, shielding herself from the harsh wind as the camera cut in closer, "it's a typhoon!"
"No, it's a volcano!" Tyler said, standing between them. The camera cut behind them to show a mountain of black rock rising up before them and erupting...something light and pink.
"A...volcano of sprinkles?" Tyler asked, the shot cutting to him sticking out his hand in bewilderment to catch the multi-colored sprinkles that were raining down upon them. "This place is off," he added, popping the sprinkles in his mouth.
The shot cut to Leonard and Alejandro glaring angrily at Chris, who was now standing and frantically pressing the button on his remote over and over. "Uhh, Chris?" Leonard asked. "Can you explain what's going on?"
"No idea what you're...talking...about...," Chris said, blatantly feigning ignorance as he shook his remote. "Just," he started punching the remote, causing it to spark, "need a minute...here..."
"You've got ten seconds to tell us what's happening," Jasmine said seriously.
"Whatever do you mean?" Chris replied calmly, the shot cutting outward then panning a foot to the right as holes opened up around the stump he'd crashed into, as well as two others and a tree nearby, and they suddenly dropped down into the ground with the holes closing up after them. "You don't have vanishing trees in Australia?"
"No," Jasmine answered.
The cast looked to the side again as the holes opened back up...and glittering and well-decorated Christmas trees rose up out of each one of them. A grand carol began to play, but it quickly warped and faded out. "Uh, what about Christmas?" Chris asked the group with a smile.
They all glared at him.
Chris sighed. "Fine," he said in annoyance. "The island's mostly artificial." The campers all gasped. "Yes! Gasp!" Chris replied, still irritated. "And we're having some technical difficulties, okay? It's nothing to worry about!" he declared, crossing his arms defiantly.
A hole suddenly opened up in the ground between him and Leonard, and everyone was forced to take a step away as a monitor suddenly rose up out of it – displaying a red skull-and-crossbones against a darker background, and with a blaring siren and a pair of loudspeakers mounted on top. "Self-destruct sequence activated," an artificial female voice announced calmly. "Island will explode in one hour," it added, the shot cutting to a close-up of the monitor as it switched to a digital timer set at 1:00 and promptly counting down to 0:59.
The campers exclaimed their shock and disbelief all at once, their words getting jumbled together as they tried to talk over one another. Chris cut them off with a blast from his airhorn.
"Zip it!" he commanded, stowing his airhorn away immediately after. "For...your next challenge," he began awkwardly, taking out a tablet computer displaying an image of what looked like a room filled with monitors, "one of you has to shutdown the self-destruct! Which is located in this," the shot cut in close to the tablet, giving a better look at the room it was displaying, "underground control room. There are three ways to get there," he explained, the tablet's displaying changing to an image of the island with large red arrows pointing down to the left, right, and center. "So, you'll split into three teams of two," the display changed again to show what looked like schematics of the island's interior. "The team that stops the countdown, wins immunity."
The camera shifted behind him to show Jasmine, Zoey, Leonard, and Sam looking at the tablet.
Leonard's eyes widened, and he darted forward. "Can I see that?" he grabbed the tablet from the host.
"Sure," Chris said in mild annoyance, letting him take it.
Confessional: Leonard
"With the tablet, I can find the fastest route to the control room, stop the countdown, and claim immunity," Leonard declared.
Confessional Ends
"Sooo, if there's no questions..." Chris said slowly as the static ended. "Ready! Set!" he looked at his watch.
"Of course we have questions," Alejandro interrupted, walking over next to Leonard. "Why does an island have a self-destruct setting?"
"How do we move on once we find the control room?" Sam added, stepping over as well.
"Why did you lie about all the fake stuff in the first place?" Zoey chimed in, stepping forward as well.
"This is just a challenge, right?" Jasmine asked nervously as she walked up next to Zoey. "Our lives aren't really in danger, right?"
"Silly Jasmine," Chris replied, walking over to the campers. "You've lives have always been in danger, just never so seriously," he told them. "But, don't worry," he said as he kept walking to the left, "I'll be right here to help you." The camera cut back out a bit to show the full cast again as a familiar roar began to rise up. "From a safe distance, in this helicopter!" he joyously explained, dust getting blown up as the camera pulled back to reveal the two-rotated military helicopter hovering above them. It dropped a hooked anchor next to Chris, who grabbed its line.
"Wait," Tyler spoke up. "Why don't we all just leave the island on the helicopter?"
"READY!" Chris called out over the roar of the helicopter, the shot cut to him being lifted up on its anchor. "SET!" he took out his airhorn. "GOOOOO!" He sounded the horn as he left.
Confessional: Tyler
"This is crazy," Tyler confessed in a panic. "I'm freaking out a little bit! I messed up by voting off Bridgette," he admitted pitifully before turning serious, "but I am slightly relieved with this. Bridgette was kinda distracting me in the game, and with her gone, I can focus on winning the money for both of us."
Confessional Ends
"T-minus 55 minutes and counting," the computerized voice said as the scene returned to the digital timer, the campers still gathered around it – Jasmine, Alejandro, Tyler, and Zoey to the left; Leonard and Sam to the right.
"Are we gonna save the island or let it blow!?" Tyler asked everyone in determination."
"Okay," Zoey opened up, "let's decide our teams!" As she spoke, the camera zoomed back out, Jasmine and Alejandro running off to the left while Sam and Leonard ran off to the right.
"Looks like we're teammates again," Tyler put an arm around Zoey's shoulder. "We're gonna take the gold together!"
Zoey gently got his arm off of her. "We can't stand here. Let's move!"
\
A tense challenge theme began playing as the scene flashed to a close-up of Alejandro and Jasmine's feet running along the ground, the shot quickly moving to them running through the woods together.
The pair ran up a series of progressively taller rocks that suddenly rose up under them. They then jumped off the tallest one, landing easily on the ground as they began running again.
"We're close," Jasmine said as they stepped on a frozen pond and slid through. "That entrance should be… WATCH OUT!!" A jet of fire shot out, causing Alejandro to slide under and Jasmine to leap over it. They ran away before another jet of fire shot out behind them.
They reached the edge of a cliff, grabbed a hanging vine, and swung onward to the left. "...right over here!" Jasmine's sentence was punctuated by their landing in front of the camera, which promptly pulled back to show the shore of a lake.
"What? Oh, come on," Jasmine said, the camera moving behind them.
"Looks like we have to swim," Alejandro told Jasmine with a small smirk.
"I guess we gotta," Jasmine replied.
Confessional: Jasmine
"Alejandro's great. He's really tame and gentle, and he's not at all an egoist like Justin is," Jasmine commented. "I don't agree with his voting choices, but I can get behind someone wanting to win."
Confessional: Alejandro
"Jasmine is a formidable opponent, but I'll have to get rid of her before the finale," Alejandro confessed. "She is a physical threat after all."
Confessionals End
The challenge music resumed as the scene moved underwater, Alejandro and Jasmine plunging in and swimming downward leaving bubbles trailing in their wake. They paused and righted themselves to look around, and the camera moved behind them to show a pipe jutting out of the lakebed with a domed hatch on it; the shot promptly cut to the wheel-handle as both teens grabbed on and tried to turn it.
After a few failed tries, Alejandro looked up in shock and pointed to the right, and the camera panned over to show the shark swimming towards them with an angry growl. Jasmine scowled, the shark opened its mouth, and then the girl punched it in the nose. It was blown back with a yelp, and Jasmine gave Alejandro a cocky smirk.
A growling caught their attention, though, and the camera pulled back to show the shark still there, rubbing its nose angrily. It snarled at them and bared its teeth, causing both teens to be scared.
The two teens frantically tried to open the hatch as the shark loomed over them...until Alejandro pulled a rotten apple out of his pocket and threw it into the shark's mouth. The shark retched, coughed in disgust, and swam off just as the two opened the hatch.
A light but tense theme played as the scene moved to a hallway lined with cables and various electronic devices, water pouring in from an open hatch in the top. Jasmine and Alejandro dropped along with it, the camera panning down to show them landing in a heap on the wet floor, the water flow soon stopping.
\
The challenge music resumed as a flash took the focus to Tyler and Zoey, running to the right through a different stretch of woods. The camera moved ahead of them as a pair of holes suddenly opened up on either side of their path and spruce shot out of them at odd angles. Zoey slid under where the trunks crossed, and moments later, Tyler came bursting out of the branches above, landing on the ground between Zoey and the camera.
"I did not see that coming!" Tyler said as he got up. "How were you able to dodge that?"
"It's called courage and grit," Zoey answered. "Those things can turn a passive small town teen who sews her own clothes into a hardened extermination machine!"
Confessional: Tyler
"As long as she's not gonna leave me for dead, I'll stick with Zoey," Tyler told the outhouse.
Confessional Ends
Zoey looked away. "I see the way in!" she said, pointing off to the left.
The shot cut to a hole in the ground, Zoey and Tyler running up to it moments later. "Let's go in-" Tyler began, taking a step to the hole before the ground shook and Zoey pulled him back. A tree shot out of the ground moments later. "-another way," Tyler finished.
Another hole opened up to the left. The two shared a certain look, then the shot cut in close to show Zoey jumping in, and Tyler following moments later.
\
The scene flashed to Leonard and Sam walking through the woods, the former looking from the tablet he'd gotten from Chris to the path in front of him.
"So Leonard," Sam said, "are we almost there?"
"According to the tablet, we're only a few feet away," Leonard answered.
"That's good," Sam smiled. "The sooner we're in the control room, the sooner our lives won't end young. I can't die when I haven't played the Superstar Series S!"
"And I have yet to prove to everyone at home that I've changed and am not delusional," Leonard added.
"That's why we have to save our own lives," Sam declared.
They stopped after a few seconds in front of a particularly large rock, and Leonard held up his tablet. "I think we're here." He twisted it around and tapped the screen, lowered the tablet and pointed at the rock.
"Okay," Sam said as he walked over. He crouched down and peered at the rock...only to fall backward as it suddenly swung upward.
The shot cut outward as Sam and Leonard stared at the opening under it for a few moments. "Might as well go in," Leonard shrugged before hopping down the hole without a second thought with Sam following behind moments later.
\
The scene flashed back to Jasmine and Alejandro, now running through the well-lit hallway, skidding to a stop when they came upon a monitor showing a live feed of Chris. "Guys! Glad I caught you," he greeted. "I have good news!"
"We're gonna live?" Jasmine asked hopefully, the camera moving around in front of her and Alejandro.
"No," Chris said shortly as the shot moved behind the teens, "I said good news. I can download the footage from all the cameras to the helicopter! So, even after the island blows up, I can still cut together an episode."
Alejandro and Jasmine scowled as the shot moved back in front of them. "Glad you're enjoying the show while we risk our lives!" Jasmine scolded.
"Hey, you think you've got it hard?" Chris shot back testily, the camera cutting to where he was sitting – in a high-backed chair at a nice desk in what would have been a rather high-class office were it not located in a military helicopter – "The cappuccino maker on this thing is terrible," he griped, taking a sip of the cup in his hand. "Oh, and try to avoid the motion sensors," he added, offhandedly at first but soon smiling his usual smile. "They set off crazy security all over the island." As he spoke the scene returned to Jasmine and Alejandro watching the monitor, and once he was finished, the monitor lifted up into the ceiling, revealing a field of security lasers switching on in the corridor beyond it.
Jasmine groaned, the viewpoint shifting to show the lasers switching on and off around her and Alejandro.
"I'm positive we can get through the lasers," Alejandro said. "We just have to be nimble and flexible."
"If you say so," Jasmine agreed.
\
A fast spy-movie theme began to play as the scene cut to the two beginning to move their way through the field of lasers. They made sure not to touch the lasers and moved their legs and arms to the spots that were laser free.
Confessional: Jasmine
"The man's got some sweet moves," Jasmine said. "Nobody's perfect, but he comes close."
Confessional Ends
The static cut away to show Alejandro landing perfectly, Jasmine following alongside him moments later. "After you," Alejandro insisted as the lasers shifted again.
"No, I believe it's... your move," Jasmine rebutted.
"Guys, seriously? Clock's ticking!" came the voice of Chris, the camera panning over to show him watching through another monitor.
This distracted the pair...and the lasers struck both of them at several points, causing an alarm to go off in the distance. The lasers shut off, but the alarm continued.
"Intruders detected," announced the computerized voice from earlier. "Releasing robotic security units." The floor to the left of the two slid open, and the camera moved behind them as several figures rose up – a bear, a crocodile, a doer deer, and a fawn, except all four had glowing red eyes and bits of missing skin that revealed the sparking robotic bodies beneath. Alejandro and Jasmine yelped and clutched each other.
Confessional: Alejandro
"Somehow, the robot animals caught my attention, but the alarm didn't," Alejandro said.
Confessional Ends
Chris audibly cringed as the footage resumed, the camera taking up a position between the robots and the contestants, on the wall opposite Chris' monitor. "Well, that was the shortest season ev-er," he said in annoyance as the music became deep and tense. "Good luck guys, I'm out!" The monitor turned off.
"Is this weird or scary?" Alejandro asked, the camera switching from the growling robots to him and Jasmine.
"Both," Jasmine replied as the tense music ramped back up, her wide-eyed gaze still locked on the robotic animals. "RUN!"
The camera jumped back to show them running down the hall with the snarling robot animals chasing right after them.
They soon gasped, and the camera shifted to show a heavy metal door lowering down ahead of them. The shot cut to them barely sliding under it with Jasmine's hat falling off.
They stood up, but Jasmine saw that her hat was off. "My hat!" she exclaimed. The tall girl dropped down to reach it, but the deer bit it with its teeth. Utilizing her strength, Jasmine tugged her hat back with the deer's head on it and the door closed.
"Phew, that was close," Jasmine said in relief.
"You might want to take a look down," Alejandro advised.
Jasmine saw the robot head on her hat and punched it away. It hit the door and fell on the floor, but it started chomping its jaws and moving towards Jasmine and Alejandro.
\
The scene flashed away with a dramatic musical flair, moving to Tyler and Zoey sliding out of the hole they'd taken and falling to the ground.
"Ten point landing!" Tyler cheered.
"Good for you, but don't forget why we're here," Zoey said.
A monitor descended from the ceiling above them and to the left, which promptly turned on to show Chris looking. "Well, well, well. Look who finally decided to join us. FYI, being more interested in each other than in saving your lives, Al and Jas managed to set off security, so now the island's crawling with killer robot animals," Chris said.
"Did you just say 'killer robot animals'?!" Tyler said in shock.
"Yeah, we had real animals," Chris explained, "but the animal rights people were all 'Blah blah blah blah', so, we switched to robot animals! Some were crazy violent though, so, we caged them down here."
"That makes sense," Zoey said.
"Does it?!" Tyler asked incredulously.
"Anyway," Chris continued, "it'd probably be way safer to go find another path from where you came in."
"But that place was filled with trees and rocks and giant gears," Zoey rebutted.
"Then stay here and let the island explode," Chris shrugged.
The camera moved to the dark doorway as a pair of round eyes appeared near the floor, and the music spiked dramatically as a small and innocent-looking orange tabby cat kitten jumped out into the open.
"Aww! That cat is so cute!" Tyler said in admiration.
"You should think again," Chris smirked deviously.
The shot cut to the kitten as its eyes glowed red and it opened its mouth up impossibly wide. Electricity shot from the walls of its mouth to the center, coalescing into a ball of crackling energy that became a massive jet of flame that was shot at the two. They quickly ducked, causing the monitor to be engulfed in flame as the music spiked dramatically once more. The device crumbled into charred pieces.
"We have to run!" Tyler yelled, turning and running away with Zoey just before another blast of fire hit them.
Confessional: Tyler
"Killer robot kittens?!" Tyler asked the outhouse. "Just when you think this island couldn't get more weird, it gets more weird!"
Confessional Ends
The static cut away to show Chris in his helicopter office, smiling with his cappuccino in hand. Dakota entered the room with a plate of macarons. "I brought you more macarons," the intern announced as she placed the plate on the table.
"Now you can go and fix the cappuccino maker," Chris ordered.
"Isn't it not working because you used it too much?" Dakota responded sarcastically. "You need to give that a rest every once in a while."
"Just go!" Chris shot back, and the fame monger rolled her eyes and left the host to face the camera. "Stay tuned to find out if anyone is still alive when they get blown up," he said with a laugh as the capstone theme played. "Here on Total! Drama! Paaahkitew Island!" The shot jumped outward repeatedly, showing the helicopter hovering over the messed-up island.
\
(Commercial Break)
\
The music trilled loud and tense as the episode resumed, the focus on a large pipe opening out of the ceiling as Leonard and Sam fell from it with screams. The tube retracted into the ceiling as the camera cut outward, revealing the two lying in a heap in a corner of a decently-sized room. The walls seemed to be made entirely of machines; a large vault door was located on the left wall with a glowing keypad on the front of it, and a monitor and some kind of futuristic keyboard were mounted on the back.
"This was not enjoyable," Leonard groaned.
"We have to find the control room," Sam said.
The monitor suddenly switched on to show Chris' smiling face. "Sam! Leonard! Congrats on being the first to the control room-" the camera cut in closer as Sam walked across the room- "and subsequently, not dying."
The camera cut to Sam looking at the keypad on the door. "What's the passcode for the door?" he asked as Leonard joined him.
"I keep it safely locked away at all times," Chris explained with a smile as the camera pulled back to show the monitor again. "In the control room." The boys groaned in aggravation. "Just start hitting random numbers. It couldn't hurt," Chris suggested. "Oh, except for the electric shocks that thing dishes out every time you get it wrong," he clarified, the camera cutting in closer. "Those'll hurt."
A phone started ringing just then, and Chris quickly took out his cellphone. "Oops, gotta take this," he said, clutching the phone to the side as it continued to ring. "It's the network. If I'm not back in fifteen minutes, I hope you had a nice life." The monitor switched off.
"So how are we able to do this part?" Sam griped. "If we get the passcode wrong, we'll be given a voltage surprise!"
"I suggest we meditate," Leonard said and got into lotus position.
"How's meditating going to help us?" Sam asked the LARPer.
"I take meditation classes once a week," Leonard explained. "It pays off when I need to think of a solution to solve my everyday problems."
"Err, I don't have a plan, so we can go with yours," Sam shrugged and got into lotus position like Leonard did.
Confessional: Sam
"I'm not one to make assumptions about people, but if Leonard's idea is to punch the keypad, we're totally doomed," Sam confessed.
Confessional Ends
The focus moved back to Leonard as he opened his eyes with inspiration. "I know just what to do to open that door," he said. He stood up and took off his left sneaker, and after spinning his arm around, he hurled the sneaker at the keypad on the door, which promptly electrocuted it.
"Did that work?" Sam wondered after he stood up.
"Just watch," Leonard smiled as the camera cut in close to show the keypad sparking, and the door sliding open moments later.
"The door opened!" Sam said in victory while entering.
"And none of us got electrocuted," Leonard added as he put on his sneaker and followed Sam.
The scene quickly moved inside the room, showing the two approaching a massive computer station. Leonard walked over to the keyboard while Sam paused in the middle of the room and looked around.
"Do you happen to have any experience in stopping self-destructing sequences?" Leonard asked.
"I remember playing a video game surrounding that subject," Sam said, "but in real life? I have to say no."
"We might as well wing it...," Leonard said as he looked over the keyboard. "Maybe this button would stop the countdown," he pressed a random button.
A quick-pan back to Sam observing his surroundings stopped in shock as a panel opened up in the floor, and a certain bear wearing various accessories rose up in front of him. "Oh, uh, Scuba Bling, or Pasta Bear, is it?" Sam greeted, suddenly nervous.
The bear ripped its accessories and fur and skin off in one fell move, revealing the robotic body beneath it. It raised its arms and let loose a mechanical roar, causing Sam to flee the room corridor. The shot followed him and the Bear back out into the hall, the door to the control room slamming shut behind them.
Confessional: Leonard
"I did not intend to endanger Sam like that," Leonard defended himself. "How was I to know that a button would summon a bear?"
Confessional Ends
"I do wish the best for Sam," Leonard begged as the scene moved back inside the control room, showing him taking a seat in the chair in front of the computer.
The massive monitor switched on to show a feed of Chris. "Leonard!" he greeted. "So, you've almost won! All you gotta do is shut it down. Disarm the self-destruct sequence," he pointed down at the keyboard.
Leonard glared. "Give me the instructions on how to do it."
"Your life isn't enough?!" Chris asked in shock.
"It's more than enough," Leonard answered. "But I'm not in a positive mood right now. I accidentally put Sam in danger and there's nothing I can do about it now."
"You guys are already in danger," Chris whined. "I don't see how you made a difference here."
"He could die any second!" Leonard shouted, unintentionally slamming his fist on a button on the keyboard.
A hollow sound played as the scene cut outside to a nondescript part of the forest...and a few of the pine trees in the foreground suddenly lifted off like rockets. The camera followed them as they flew through the air, shooting at the helicopter which had to keep ducking and swerving to narrowly avoid getting hit. And all the while, Chris' cries of pain echoed forth from it.
The scene cut back to the control room, Chris standing back up on the monitor's feed. "Hey! Have some respect for nature!" he yelled.
"If you want this show to keep going, then just tell me which buttons to push," Leonard demanded. "That way, we're all alive and you don't get sued by our parents."
"I doubt that," Chris countered. "You do know that there are other contestants in a competition for a million bucks and they're coming over to take immunity from you and be the hero."
"I'll try this without your help then," Leonard said, pressing a button that turned off the monitor.
\
"CHEEEEEEFFF!" Chris yelled as the scene flashed to a close-up of the curtained door to a cockpit, the host soon arriving through it with his cappuccino cup held high. "WE'VE GOT AN EMERGENCY!" The shot cut backward to show Chef at the controls in his pilot's uniform, looking at Chris. "The foamy thing on the coffee machine won't work at all now!" he exclaimed, taking a long sip of coffee.
"Also, Leonard's gonna try and fail to save us," he added in a much calmer voice. "We gotta warn the others." He took another long sip of coffee. "As soon as the foamy thing is working properly again."
\
A flash took the scene to Jasmine and Alejandro walking to the left through another hallway, skidding to a stop as a growing scream got their attention. The end of a large pipe suddenly shot down from the ceiling in front of them, and moments later, Tyler and Zoey fell out of it.
"Hey! Thank goodness it's you guys and not more of those crazy robots," Jasmine said as the two stood up.
"It's a long story," Tyler said, "but I can tell it. Okay, so first-"
"Ten minutes to self-destruct," the computerized voice announced suddenly.
"I'll just give you the short version," Tyler finished, not at all bothered by the announcement.
They were quickly interrupted by the appearance of a monitor, lowering down from the ceiling. Rather than a video feed, however, it displayed only an audio signal as a green-toned graph.
The person on the other end cleared their throat, then Leonard's voice said "Hey guys! I'm glad I found you! I'm in the control room, but there's no way to turn off the self-destruct from here! Chris was lying to us."
"That figures...," Zoey grunted as the shot moved to the campers.
"Anfitrión incompetente," Alejandro muttered.
"We can only shut it down from here," Leonard added, the monitor switching to a floor plan of the facility with a red arrow led from a flashing dot, through the halls, to another room.
"That's just down the hall," Zoey said, leaning in and checking the display.
"Good job, Leonard!" Jasmine congratulated before they all ran off.
\
The footage flashed ahead to another room, a door sliding up on the right and Tyler, Zoey, Alejandro, and Jasmine running in.
They immediately stopped and gasped.
A deep, tense tune took over the background music as the viewpoint shifted to that of the campers, the camera panning across countless robotic duplicates of Chris McLean attached to the ceiling by strange devices with lots of wires and cables and tubes extending from a central part with a pale blue light on the front.
"Well, this is definitely a new level of creepy," Tyler remarked.
"I didn't know those would be there," Leonard said over the intercom. "You need to get by them somehow!" he added as the door slammed shut behind the campers. The shot cut back to the robots as the tense, dramatic music rose up, and their eyes started to glow red...then, one by one, the devices holding them up released, and they dropped to the floor.
"Well, this isn't good," Tyler said as the robotic Chrises stepped around him and the others, forcing them to stand close together back-to-back. "Any last words before we die fighting?" he asked.
"I do," Zoey said before looking at the camera. "Quebec Tanner, I want you to know that I'm sorry for thinking of you as weird behind your back. Sure you like collecting spiders and beetles, but I can tell you simply wanted to be my friend, and I was being hypocritical by ignoring you on purpose," she finished with a sad look.
Confessional: Alejandro
"I don't normally express my emotions openly, but I am touched by Zoey's apology," Alejandro mentioned. "It came from the heart, and that's something I can respect."
Confessional Ends
"Total! Drama! Drama! Ha-ha-ha!" the robot chanted in a stilted chorus as another wave of them approached the campers.
"It's like an army of aliens!" Jasmine said to the group.
"These robots are going down! Boxing skills, don't let me down!" Tyler roared, heavy metal music taking over the audio as he charged forward and grabbed the nearest Chris-bot, picked it up, and threw it at three. Another one approached him and he punched its face in, then a third one came up from behind and grabbed him around the neck, but he bit clean through its arm.
The shot cut to the three watching in utter shock as the sounds of battle and the occasional bit of robot came flying through the air.
Confessional: Jasmine
"I should be scared, but since this is Chris getting wrecked, the fear has left my body," Jasmine admitted.
Confessional: Tyler
"I've never won a trophy, I've never been the MVP of my sports teams, and I've especially never had a girlfriend!" Tyler confessed. "If you think I'm going to die without these events happen, you're heavily wrong!"
Confessionals End
The static cut away to a severed Chris-bot head bouncing off the floor and landing with a thud. "Total! Total! Toootal...Toooootalll..." it said, its voice growing slower and deeper and its eyes losing their red glow with each repetition until it finally lay still and silent. The shot cut to Tyler standing among a pile of robot parts, breath heaving and oil splattered on his clothes.
"Guys! You're not gonna believe this!" came the sudden voice of Chris, the camera pulling back as a monitor showing a video feed of the host descended from the ceiling. He spotted the pile of destroyed robots at the campers' feet. "Hey! What did you do to my promo-bots?" he asked in shock and outrage.
"Promo-bots?" Alejandro repeated in confusion.
"How do you think I did the promotion tours for the show?" Chris asked angrily. "You think I went to all those malls myself?"
"Kinda violent for promo-bots!" Jasmine scowled.
"They gotta defend themselves," Chris explained, growing angrier. "Do you have any idea what the average Total Drama fan is like? DO YOU?!"
"We have every right to be infuriated!" Alejandro shot back with anger of his own. "If you'd actually done something instead of sipping some cappuccinos, this wouldn't have happened!"
"First off," Chris replied as the camera cut in closer to the monitor, "I'm on to smoothies now." He paused to take a sip of a smoothie in a greenish cup with a long straw. "Secondly, I don't like your tone," he continued. "And thirdly! Thiiirdly! Dang," he paused, his momentum abruptly lost, "I had something for this. It was a big one, too," he said, scratching his head with his straw as he tried to think. "Umm...uhh..."
Just then the shot cut to the door into the room as Sam was thrown through it, the robot once known as Scuba/Bling/Pasta Bear charging in after. Sam landed at Zoey's feet with a thud and a groan from the former, and the camera panned up to show the others tensing up for another fight.
Quickly, Sam picked himself up and charged at the bear. "I am starting to hate bears!" he said as he was face to face with the robot bear. "Duck!" the gamer said, ducking as the bear tried to punch him and he popped up. "Duck!" He quickly ducked again. "Jump!" Another punch avoided. "PUNCH!" He threw a punch hard on the bear's head, and Sam just smirked as the robot sparked, then exploded into pieces.
Confessional: Sam
"I always knew those moves would come in handy," Sam chuckled.
Confessional Ends
"Right, thirdly," Chris said as the camera panned back to show Sam with the group, "Leonard is inside the control room and may kill us all if he doesn't know how most of the buttons function."
"What?" Jasmine wondered.
"What do we do?" Zoey asked hopelessly.
\
A flash took the scene to a close-up of a fist pounding against the control room door, the camera soon pulling back to reveal the pounder as Sam. "Leonard, are you still in there?!" he asked.
A tense note played as a monitor lowered nearby, showing Leonard's face. "I've been trapped in this room for a while," he said. "The door is locked. While I locate the button to open it, you can figure out how to get in. We have-" he looked up.
"Four minutes and counting, "the computerized voice said.
"Hold tight, everyone," Leonard said, turning off the monitor.
It immediately turned back on. "How's it going on your end?" Chris asked.
"The door's still locked, but Leonard will try and open it," Tyler said.
"You're right," Chris accepted before turning to the side and calling out "Chef, move us to a safe distance! She's gonna blow!"
"What?!" Tyler said in disbelief.
"You can't just let us die!" Jasmine added.
"Um, yeah. You all signed a release," Chris replied. "One million bucks is a lot of cash."
The campers immediately began to protest, their angered voices all rising up and mixing together until Chris cut them off with a blow from his airhorn. "ZIP IT!" he shouted, and the camera cut back to the monitor to show him smiling. "Just wanted to do that one last time. Later guys!"
The monitor shut off once more, and a few deep notes played as the campers shared a worried look.
"We're really going to die, aren't we?" Alejandro said in a panic. "I'll never get to see my mother, my father, or even my brother, José, again."
Confessional: Alejandro
"My older brother and I do have some issues," Alejandro started. "José always has to win! Always! He lives to make me miserable! He punches me in the arm and calls me Al just because I hate it!"
Confessional Ends
The scene flashed to Leonard sitting in at the control panel when the monitor turned on showing Sam in the inner workings of the island.
"Have you figured out how to open the door?" Sam asked.
"I've got it figured out!" Leonard said, quickly pressing a few buttons. After he was done, the door opened, and the five entered the control room.
"Thanks for letting us in," Zoey told Leonard as she rushed past him.
"I'm sorry for any trouble I inadvertently got you all into," Leonard apologized.
"Don't sweat it," Jasmine waved it off. "It wasn't even your fault."
"And I did manage to take down a robotic bear," Sam grinned. "The lack of video games may be doing wonders for me."
"Self-destruct, terminated." The computer's voice rang loud and clear through the room. The camera pulled out to show the room's monitors displaying 00:00 against bluish backgrounds, and Zoey standing proudly at the main console.
"I just pressed random buttons, and I guess it worked," she said with a smile.
The others got cut off by the main monitor switching to a video feed of Chris. "Guys, before you all die," he said calmly, "I just wanted to say that...OH!" he said in realization upon opening his eyes and seeing the room. "Whoa! You stopped the destruction! Nice," he laughed. "Way better than dying, am I right?"
"Yes, no thanks to you," Jasmine shot at him angrily.
Sam pulled out one of the detached Chris heads. "I'm going to keep this head as a souvenir…and as something to scare the house flies away!" He got promptly shocked by the head, leading him to fling it away.
The Chris head crashed into the monitor, causing a shower of sparks and an electrocution.
The shot cut to Chris, sitting in the copilot's seat of the helicopter's cabin with Chef beside him. "Not the computer!" the host exclaimed as the console in front of him crackled with electricity, then started to smoke.
"Island Sector A," the computerized voice announced as the shot moved to a raging forest fire, "combustion initiated." The shot cut next to one of the windows of the helicopter, Chris pressing his face against it to look outside. "Island Sector B, cryo activation completed," the computer said as the shot cut to an iced-over portion of the forest, snow falling and a sasquatch frozen in ice sliding by.
"Grrrreat," Chris said dryly as he returned to his seat, the camera jumping outward to show the entire island – the left half now engulfed in flame, the right have covered in ice.
\
The scene faded ahead to the next night, the usual elimination music beginning over a shot of the area where the Cannon of Shame was located. "To the following players, I give you your marshmallows," Chris said, the shot cutting in close to show him holding a tray of marshmallows, as well as Chef, Jasmine, Zoey, Tyler, Alejandro, and Sam. "And this time, there's no dramatic tension since Leonard the LARPer decided to make things easier and quit the competition." The five remaining contestants each received their marshmallows.
"Leonard, are you sure you want to leave this way?" Tyler asked.
"Absolutely," Leonard agreed as the shot cut to him in the muzzle of the cannon. "After what I've been through this season, I have changed a lot. I am now much more comfortable in pushing my fantasies to the back of my mind and embracing reality. I am thankful that you all have accepted me but now I feel my life is more important than the million."
"That's pretty honorable of you," Jasmine admitted with a smile.
"And if it makes you feel better, we're going to miss you," Sam added. "Send me a call if you need someone to game or LARP with."
"It would be my plea-SSSUUURRREEE!!!!" Leonard promised before Chris pressed the button on his remote, sending the boy screaming into the night.
The camera moved back onto Chris, the frozen yeti floating by in the background. "Well, we almost tested the Big Bang Theory," he told the camera with a smile as the capstone theme began to play. "But, at least everything's back to normal. Tune in next week to see who stays in the gang, and who goes bang. Here, on Total! Drama! Paaaaahkitew Island!"
The island was still half-burning, half-frozen as the camera made its final zoom outward.
(Roll the Credits)
Final Five: Alejandro, Jasmine, Sam, Tyler, Zoey
Author's Note: And with that, Leonard is gone. He had the least plot out of everybody left, and we didn't want to give him a bullshit elimination or disqualification, so we had him decide to quit instead.
14th: Staci
13th: Dakota
12th: Sugar
11th: Beardo
10th: Gwen
9th: Justin
8th: Cameron
7th: Bridgette
6th: Leonard