Author's Note: I have to admit, I never, ever thought my fic would be so popular already. I was skeptical at first, but now, I am quite proud. Thank you for all your support.
A door began to unfold in three parts out of thin air. Once the brown door with the big eyeball was fully complete, it opened up and the same owl came out carrying its trash bag. Both Luz and Stephen ran out after.
"Stop adorably hopping away you…" Luz stopped when she noticed the new place she was in, which was the inside of an eerie tent full of old odds and ends.
Stephen stopped and shared in his sister's confusion. "Whoa. That's odd. The inside of a wooden house shouldn't look like a tent."
"Finally, you're back!" cried a woman's voice from outside. Stephen and Luz peeked out a small opening in the tent wall. Their eyes gazed at a hooded woman with pale skin, a fang sticking out, and a red dress. The woman was approached by the owl who passed the garbage bag to her. It then rested on top of her staff and she twisted it until it looks more like a wooden fixture.
"Who's that?" Luz asked.
"I don't know." Stephen said.
"Now, let's see what we've got here." The woman said pulling out several stuff. There was a phone. "Garbage." She tossed it away and pulled out a ring. "Garbage." She then replaced it with a solid-gold chalice. "Garbage. Wait! Now, this…" She pulled out a pair of springing-eye glasses and tried them on. "This will make me rich." She then pulled out the Azura book. "Oh, and this will make good kindling." She was about to hold it to the fire when…
"NO!" Luz yelled out. She jumped out of the tent and swiped her book out of the pale woman's hand. "Excuse me. Sorry. It's mine. Thank you."
"Luz!" Stephen said. "Look, whatever's going on, let's get out of here before…" He was interrupted when the eyeball door folded back up into the form of a suitcase. The pale lady revealed a key with the same pattern as the door.
"You're not going anywhere." She said threateningly.
"Nope!" Stephen yelled out. He reached under the tent wall and pulled it open. He and Luz went through and ran outside. But after just a few seconds, they stopped to look at what else had changed. They were no longer in Gravesfield, Connecticut.
On top of the cliff edge they stood, the two gazed out into a whole town with too many arms and teeth. A dragon flew by and got caught by one of those arms. The denizens looked casual going about their days, which included a cloaked man selling ice cream before eating someone, giant chicken legs, and a giant centipede opening its mouth and letting out a winged creature that it kissed. This was clearly not Earth anymore.
"This… This can't be happening. What's going on?" Luz asked.
"Don't panic, Luz." Stephen said. "There's got to be a reasonable explanation. Maybe this is some kind of shared delusion or something." His eyes gazed at a punk fairy that watched the two of them from the side. "Um… Hello, little fairy thing. This is a dream, right?"
"GIVE ME YOUR SKIN!"
Luz reacted by screaming and slapping the fairy away. "What's going on? Did we die? Are we in the bad place?"
The elderly pale woman caught up to the two human kids and grabbed them both by their shoulders. "You wish." She dragged them back to the tent and set them down in front where her counter was.
"I'm so sorry!" Luz panicked cowering in her stool. "I just wanted my book! If you're going to eat my skin, just make it quick!"
"At least spare my brain." Stephen said. "I'm donating it for science!"
"Eat you?" the pale woman asked. "Why would I eat… potential customers?"
Both Stephen and Luz widened their eyes in confusion. "Huh?" Stephen asked.
"You heard me." The pale woman said. "I send Owlbert here into your world to collect human stuff so that I can sell them here."
Stephen leaned in closer. "I'm sorry. Maybe you didn't hear me, so I'll say it again… Huh?"
"Can I offer you a human foot filled with holes?" the pale woman asked pulling out a Croc. "A bar of green human candy?" She pulled out a deodorant. "How about this black shadowbox that only reflects sadness?" She brought out a blacked out TV.
"That's a television set." Stephen said.
Luz chuckled. "Here. Let me see it." She took the TV and put in a pair of batteries found in a bowl labeled "human candy". The screen then changed showing a workout video. The strange creatures from the street heard the video and approached in curiosity. Soon enough, plenty of questions and offers were lining up.
"I'll pay 40 snails for the screaming box!"
"I'll give you a hundred!"
"Can I eat the tiny person inside?"
"Luz, what are you doing?" Stephen asked. "We don't know who or what these things are."
"Well, that lady kinda closed our only way home." Luz said. "What else was I supposed to do?"
"Well, kids, I gotta say, I'm impressed." The fanged woman said. "What did you say your names were?"
"We didn't." Stephen said.
"I'm Luz. And this guy here is my brother, Stephen."
"Luz!" Stephen yelled out.
"Well, Luz and Stephen, that was pretty clever for a human."
"That's kind of a weird thing for another human to say." Luz said.
"Oh, dear child, I'm not like you." The pale woman removed a rag she had revealing a pair of pointy ears.
"What the… Who are you?" Stephen asked the stranger.
"I'm Eda the Owl Lady, the most powerful witch on the Boiling Isles! I am respected! Feared!"
"Busted!" A large man in a pointed-cone mask suddenly showed up and crushed the TV set with his fist. Every other customer ran in fear of the assailant. "Eda the Owl Lady, you are wanted for misuse of magic and demonic misdemeanors!" He held up a wanted poster with Eda's drawing on it.
"Oh, perfect. Not only are we in some nonsense place, our first stranger we talk to is a criminal." Stephen groaned.
"I know. Pretty cool, I'd say."
"Luz!"
"Would you guys quit following me around?" Eda asked. "I haven't done squat."
"You two are coming too," the guard said approaching Luz and Stephen, "For fraternizing with a criminal."
"What?" Stephen asked. "That's ridiculous! We haven't done anything wrong! We're just trying to go home!"
"Well, thanks to your new friend here," the guard said, "Your new home is the Conformatorium!"
"All right, you win." Eda said. "Just let me get my stuff." She reached down slowly, but she stood back up striking at the guard with her staff. She tapped it on the ground and her entire stand floated up and were stuffed into a bag. After getting her suitcase-door, she ran off. "Follow me, humans!"
With very little choice, both Stephen and Luz followed Eda in her chase. Once they were far enough, Eda grabbed both of them and planted them on top of her staff which she rode off into the sky like a classic broomstick in witch folklore.
The guard stopped chasing as soon as he saw them flying off. "You won't get away with this, Owl Lady! …Yeah, all right. You did. You got away with it. She got away with it, everybody! Typical."
Up into the sky, both Luz and Stephen looked out to see the red landscape they hovered above with great speed. Luz looked at Eda, who was piloting the staff they were flying on.
"Flying staffs. Crazy monsters. You're a witch. What is this place?"
"Yeah, I'm with Luz on this one." Stephen said. "Where we're from, there's no such thing as magic."
"Maybe not in your dimension." Eda said. "This is the Boiling Isles. Every myth you humans have is caused by a little of our world leaking into yours. Griffins, vampires, giraffes…"
"Giraffes?" Stephen asked.
"Oh, yeah. We banished those guys. A bunch of freaks." She began to lower her staff until it was just over the ground. She got up, but Luz and Stephen gasped as they a saw that the Owl Lady's hand was still gripping onto the staff with a bit of bone sticking out. Eda picked it up and reattached it to her wrist. "Oops. That happens sometimes."
"Well, I've had enough adventure for today." Luz said. "This is clearly not the PG fantasy world I always dreamed about."
"Finally, I was getting worried for a minute that you'd want to stay." Stephen said. "We can just head on home and forget this experience ever happened. So—Eda, was it—would you mind helping us return to our home?"
"Only if you help me first." Eda replied. "I'll explain everything once we're inside."
"Inside where?" Stephen asked.
Eda moved some bushes to reveal an old-looking house with a tower at the back and an eye-shaped window on the second floor. As they approached the front door, they noticed an owl face that was clearly alive.
"Hoot, hoot. Password please." Eda responded by poking its eyes. "Ow!"
"We don't have time for this, Hooty. Let us in."
"All right. All right. Geez. You never want to have any fun. Ow. Hoot."
The door opened and Eda lead the two kids in. With a snap of her fingers, the lights lit up the living room with candles and a bird-like glyph on the ceiling.
"Well, this isn't eerie at all." Stephen commented sarcastically.
"Welcome to the Owl Sanctum. Where I hide away from the pressures of modern life… also the cops… also ex-boyfriends."
"This place is beautiful." Luz said. "And you live here alone?" Her question was answered by the sound of footsteps approaching from the hallway.
"Actually, I have a roommate." Eda said.
A shadow began to show itself as a mysterious figure got closer. "Who dares intrude upon I, the King of Demons?" The "King of Demons" revealed himself to be only a small, furry creature with a skull-like head and big eyes. It wore a duck-and-heart pattern bathing towel while carrying a rubber duck.
Luz's eyes lit up in excitement as she dashed over and hugged him by surprise. "Ay, que lindo! Eda, he's so cute! Who's a widdle guy? Who's a widdle guy? Is it you? Is it you?" She continued to cuddle King much to his confusion.
"No! I don't know who your little guy is! Eda, who is this monster?"
"Oh, this is Luz, the human. The cheery guy over here is her brother, Stephen."
"Luz, I know that thing is adorable, but control yourself!" Stephen said pulling Luz off. She waved her arms trying to hug King again.
"These two are gonna help us with our little… situation." Eda said.
"What situation?" Luz asked.
"Just let me explain." Eda said. "King was once a mighty king of demons, until his Crown of Power was stolen and he became… this. The crown is being held by the evil Warden Wrath and locked away behind a magical force field that only a human can break through."
"That seems very specific." Stephen said.
"Well, Warden Wrath has designed it to be impenetrable against witches, demons, and most other creatures." Eda explained. "Yet, the thought of making it human-proof never occurred to him. If you two help us retrieve this crown, we'll send you back to your dimension. So what do you say? I mean, we're kinda your only way home."
"So we don't really have a choice, do we?" Luz asked.
"So you're not just going to send us home for nothing?" Stephen asked.
"Buddy, a human entering our dimension is a very rare experience." Eda said. "Two humans at once is too good to pass up."
"Don't worry, Stefano. Nothing will go wrong once I get back my…" King started to say.
"Stefano? No, my name is Stephen. Stephen Strange."
"Hey!" King exclaimed. "I may be odd, but there's no need for name calling."
"No, I mean my last name is Strange."
"I don't care how weird your name is. That's not important."
Eda chuckled. "As entertaining as this is starting to be, we better get going."
"Where are we going?" Luz asked.
"Somewhere super fun." Eda replied.
It wasn't as fun as Eda described. The Conformatorium was a dark prison tower that reached out into the stormy sky. Luz, Stephen, Eda, and Kind approached the site from the side.
"What is this place?" Stephen asked.
"This is the Conformatorium," Eda described, "It's a special prison for those they deem unfit for society. They've been trying to send me and King here for ages, but we're too slippery."
"Just try to catch me when I'm smothered in grease. I'm a squirmy little fella." King said. "You two and I will sneak up to the top of the tower, where they're holding my crown."
"And I'm gonna make sure the warden's distracted."
"Will I need a disguise?" Luz asked. "I've been waiting to use this." She put on her purple hood with cat ears. "Meow, meow."
"It's hideous." King said.
"And ridiculous." Stephen said. "There's no way that's going to work."
"Oh, you'll fit right in." Eda said before forming a platform that lifted them to the top floor window. She then got on her staff and flew away.
Once they were inside, the three continued their trek until they found a very large room with several stories shown below it. The walls were covered with prison cells that are occupied by beasts of varying shapes and sizes. One of them, a teenage girl with fangs showing, took notice of the intruders.
"Hey, you. How'd you get out of your cell?"
"Well, we're not criminals." Luz said.
"Not yet, you're not." King said.
"Neither are we." The fanged girl said.
"Then why are you here, miss…" Stephen asked.
"Name's Katya. And the stupid warden likes to lock people up who don't fit in. Like, I write fanfics of food falling in love. I like food. I like love. Just let me write about it."
"That's it?" Stephen asked. "Is that really worth locking someone up?" He turned to another prisoner, a large, gray man with eyeballs all over his body. "And what about you? Why are you here?"
"I'm here because I like eating my own eyes." The eye guy demonstrated by plucking an eye out of one of his sockets and eating it. Strangely enough, it showed up back at its original socket.
Stephen was a little creeped out. "Well, that's certainly disturbing, but I don't see anything illegal. It's just a weird habit." His attention was then brought to a small creature with a very big nose who was yelling.
"We are agents of fwee expwession! They will never siwence us!"
"What?" Stephen asked.
"Yeah," Katya said, "Tiny Nose there is really big into conspiracy theories."
"The world is a simulation! We are but pwaythings for a higher being!"
Stephen looked at one last prisoner. He looked like an thin, elderly man with yellow sunglasses, a balding head, and white hair that matched his mustache. "And what about you? What are you in for, mister…?"
"Call me Stan. And to answer your question, that no-good warden just thinks I make too many cameos."
"These aren't crimes." Luz said. "None of you actually did anything wrong. You're all just a bunch of weirdos. Like us."
"Well, like you maybe." Stephen said.
Suddenly, a bunch of footsteps were heard closing in.
"It's Warden Wrath! Hide!" Katya yelled out.
The three immediately ran into an open cell making sure the large, muscular man in the plague doctor mask didn't see them when he came in.
Warden Wrath growled as he picked up a wanted poster of Eda. "The Owl Lady. I'll get my hands on her soon enough."
"Fight against the oppwessor!" Tiny Nose ranted. "We will wewist! We will conquer! We will never be afwaid of you, you old cweep!" Warden Wrath opened the cage only to pluck her up aggressively.
"Let this be a lesson to all of you." Wrath said. "There's no place in society for you if you can't fit in." He threw her back to her cell and left the room.
"Sheesh. That guy needs to take a chill pill." Stan said.
"Don't worry!" Luz said approaching the release levers. "I'll get you all out." She tried to push the lever, but couldn't budge it. "No! My weak, nerd arms! Stephen, you've got to help!"
Stephen sighed before heading over to the lever to join his sister. He joined her to try to flip the switch. He tried for a minute to help her, but after that, Stephen began to yell and fell to his knees. He clutched his hands and Luz dropped down to his aid.
"Are you all right?" Luz asked.
"NO, I AM NOT ALL RIGHT!" Stephen yelled out. "WE JUST STRAINED MY HANDS!"
"OH, MY GOODNESS!" Luz gasped. "Stephen, I am so sorry! Here!" She reached into her pocket and pulled out a a pill bottle. She dropped a tablet from it into his mouth and let him calm down.
"Uh… What's up with him?" King asked.
"His hands are really damaged." Luz said. "He had a terrible accident a few years ago and he's still feeling the nerve damage, especially if his hands are strained."
"You better move on then." Katya said. "It's pretty obvious that this is really hurting you. Enjoy freedom for us"
Stephen took a deep breath before being able to move his hands once more. "Come on, Luz. Let's just get this over with."
Luz frowned and continued their walk through the tower hallways until Eda suddenly flew in catching up with them.
"Hey. I just checked. The warden is distracted tormenting some tiny creature. He won't be coming around here anytime soon."
"That's good to know." Stephen said still rubbing his hands. He stopped walking when he came across a large door that was labeled "CONTRABAND".
"It's not fair, you know, that they're all in here." Luz said. "They just want to be themselves. Why does everyone think that being a weirdo is so bad?"
Stephen sighed. "Who can say?"
Eda opened the contraband door and everyone entered inside. At the center of the green room stood a large pillar made of light.
"I take it that's the force field?" Stephen asked.
"That's right." Eda said. "So you two better do your thing."
Luz and Stephen slowly walked over side by side. They managed to get through the light with ease making it to a very large pile of junk. And at the top of the junk was a crown-shaped item, but it wasn't at all what they expected to find.
"Wait, is that a…"
Luz' question was answered when she and her brother emerged from the field with the item they came for. But it wasn't a real crown. It was made of plastic paper with the words "Burger Queen" on it. The sight of it made King jump for joy.
"My crown!" He took the fake crown and placed it on his head. "Yes! I can feel my powers returning!" He found a toy rabbit and picked it up. "Nightmare critter, I shall call you Francois and you shall be a minion in my army of darkness! HAHA!"
Both Stephen and Luz were in utter shock at what they were seeing.
"That crown's not magic, is it?" Luz asked.
"Nope." Eda said.
"Is he even a king of demons?" Stephen asked.
"No, he's just some stray who likes to play pretend."
"…Then what was the point?" Stephen asked aggressively. "We were chased by the police this morning, you made us break into a heavily-guarded tower, I strained my hands to much, and it was all for this! Why?"
Eda sighed. "Sorry about what you had to go through. We're just desperate. Just look at us, kids. King and I don't have much in this world. We only have each other. So if that dumb crown is important to him, it's important to me. And besides, us weirdos have to stick together."
Luz smiled at that. She turned and saw a slight smile from her brother's face. "Ha! I saw that."
Stephen played ignorant. "I don't know what you're talking about."
"Well, we've pretty much overstayed our welcome." Eda said. "Now, let's get out of here before the warden finds us and loses his head."
"Too late."
Eda was caught by surprise when Warden Wrath approached her from behind. And before she could turn around, he formed his hand into an axe and sliced it right through her neck sending her own head flying right into Luz' hand.
"AAAHH!" Luz screamed out.
"This is way darker than I expected!" Stephen cried.
"OW!" Eda spoke even though she was decapitated. "I hate it when that happens."
"You're still alive?" Stephen asked.
"Yeah, I mean, you did catch me without my hands earlier." Eda said.
"Finally, I have you cornered, Eda the Owl Lady." Warden Wrath said approaching the group with his guards. "My guards could never get you, but I knew if I took your pet's toy, you'd come running." He took King's toy crown and crumbled it firmly.
"NO! My power!" King panicked.
"What do you want with me?" Eda asked. "I've never actually broken any of your stupid laws… in front of you."
"I want you…" Warden Wrath dropped to one knee and held up a bouquet of flowers. "..To go out with me."
"WHAT?!" everyone asked in shock.
"You've always eluded our capture. You've always been the one who got away. I find that alluring."
"I hate everything you're saying right now." Luz said.
"Yeah, I certainly don't ship it." Stephen agreed.
"You stay out of this!" Wrath yelled. He swiped Eda's head. "So how about it, Owl Lady? The most powerful witch of the Boiling Isles and the feared Warden Wrath. We'd be the strongest power couple ever. I mean, it's not like you can say no right now."
Eda sighed. "All right, Warden. You win. I'd just like to say something first. Come closer. Just a little bit closer." Wrath slowly moved his head close to her face. "That's good. PFFFFFT!" She shot out her tongue and blew a raspberry at him making him groan in disgust. "Get over it! You had your guards stalk me and then you cut off my head. I am not going out with you."
"If you don't accept, then I have no choice but to…"
Luz interrupted Warden Wrath by hitting him over the head with Eda's owl staff. She picked up Eda's head while Stephen grabbed King and Eda's body.
"Okay, we're going now!" Luz called out getting everyone on top of the owl staff.
"Gun it, magic stick!" Eda ordered. Upon command, the owl staff whisked them out of the room, but Warden Wrath was closing in on their tail. He removed his plague mask revealing an entire mouth for a face that breathed fire.
"Eda, lend me a hand!" Luz cried out as they approached the prison cells.
Eda raised her hand behind Luz's and with their combined strength, they flipped all the cell door switches and freed the prisoners as they passed. Their chase then got them all landing in the courtyard outside of the tower. Eda reattached her head and pulled her key out of her hair. She gave it to Stephen.
"Kids, you're free to go back to the human world!" Eda ran off to match her magic against Warden Wrath's fury.
"What about you guys?" Luz asked.
"If you think this guy is bad, you should have seen her last boyfriend!" King joked.
Luz turned to Stephen. "We're not really leaving, are we?"
For a moment, he hesitated. He wasn't sure what to do. That is, until he saw the prisoners standing around in the open door. He and Luz approached them.
"What are you guys doing here?" Stephen asked. "This is your chance to escape."
"The warden will catch us." Said the multi-eyed man. "He always does."
"We belong here." Katya said.
"Self-doubt is a pwison you can never escape fwom." Tiny Nose added.
"So you all have a different way of doing things, a different way of seeing things." Luz said. "That may make you weird, but it also makes you awesome. Don't you see?"
"Why are you helping us?" Katya asked.
"Because us weirdos have to stick together!" Luz proclaimed. "And no one should be punished for who they are!" Stephen nodded at his sister.
Stan smiled at that and took a step outside. "Face front, true believers! I'm in!"
Warden Wrath had Eda and King cornered. "No more running away, Owl Lady. Today, I capture you once and for all."
"HEY, DENTAL JOB!" Stephen shouted charging in with Luz and the other misfits. They all tackled the warden pushing him down.
"I ATE MY OWN EYE!" the multi-eyed man expressed proudly.
"I THINK THE WORLD IS A TWIANGLE!" Tiny Nose declared.
"I AM THE KING OF CAMEOS!" Stan added in.
"AND I PRACTICE THE ANCIENT ART OF FANFICTION!" Katya said. Together, the misfits tied Warden Wrath's arms behind him.
"You're going to need this." Stephen said handing Luz a large firework.
"My firework from my book report?" Luz asked. "Stephen, how…"
"I kinda stuffed it in my backpack and completely forgot it was there." Stephen said. "If you want to use it, then this might be the best chance."
Luz smiled taking the firework. "Gracias, Stephen. Eres un buen hermano."
"You!" Wrath fumed with flames leaking from his mouth as he saw Luz and Stephen approaching him. "Who do you think you are?"
"Do not underestimate us, Warden Wrath, for I am Luz Noceda and this is my brother, Stephen Strange! We are warriors of peace… NOW, EAT THIS, SUCKA!" She quickly tossed the firework in Wrath's mouth, which exploded on impact with his fire breath. Thankfully, everyone got away just in time and saw the firework show that followed.
"That was actually one of her better breakups." King said.
"Not a breakup." Eda said. "Anyway, let's bounce before any more monsters fall in love with me."
Upon returning to the Owl Sanctum, Eda pressed the eye in her key and the door appeared.
"Well, a deal's a deal." Eda said. "Let's get you home."
Stephen sighed. "Well, this was certainly an event that no one home will believe. Well, maybe that strange curator guy, but he kinda gives me a psychotic vibe. Ready to go home, Luz? I'm sure your mom's going to want an explanation why we missed out bus to camp."
Luz picked up her Good Witch Azura novel and took a good look at it. She sighed before replying. "Actually, Stephen, I think we should stick around here a little bit longer."
"I beg your pardon?" Stephen asked.
Luz turned to everyone. "I know you kinda got your head cut off and we started some kind of prison riot, but this was the most fun I've ever had. Come on, Stephen, you've got to admit that at least."
"Whether or not it was fun doesn't matter." Stephen said.
"Bro, we don't fit in at home. And Eda, you don't fit in here. If we stay, we could not fit in together. I don't want to go to summer camp. I want to stay and become a witch like Azura."
"You can't be serious!" Stephen said. "You're really wanting to live out your dream fantasy? That's crazy!"
"I agree with your brother." Eda said. "Humans can't become witches."
"Maybe that's because they haven't tried." Luz said. "If you teach me to become a witch, I'll do anything you want. And Stephen, this might be a good thing for you too."
"What are you talking about?"
"Look, back on Earth, you've spent four years researching on ways to get your hands back to normal so you can retain your dream of being a doctor. Nothing looked promising to you, but perhaps you weren't looking in the right place. Maybe what you need is some kind magic cure."
"You think there's some kind of magical remedy that can heal my nerve damage?" Stephen asked. He turned to Eda. "Is there?"
"Well, my healing skills are a little rusty, so I don't think I can help. I could check out for healers, but I don't think we've ever dealt with nerve damage, so there's no guarantee. But if there's no solution here on the Boiling Isles, then I don't think there's one in any dimension. But it will have to be your choice."
Stephen thought for a moment over the pros and cons. He noticed his hands shaking involuntarily and he sighed.
"Okay, Luz, here's the deal. We can stay here so you can learn some magic and live out your witch fantasy. Meanwhile, I'll look for a magical solution to my nerve damage. But all that's over on the day that summer camp's supposed to end. On that date, even if you want to have more adventures, even if I haven't found my answer, we take the portal back home to Gravesfield. Deal?"
Luz smiled and hugged her brother. "Thanks, Stephen."
After that, Luz and Stephen set up their sleeping bags and slept through their first night in the Boiling Isles. Their mission was now set, Luz wanted to learn magic and Stephen was off to heal his hands. Their adventure has truly begun.
Author's Note: I know that this chapter turned out to be much longer than the first one. I originally planned to end this right before they get to the Conformatorium, but it didn't seem very impactful. I decided then to just use the rest of episode one here.
Also, how do you like the Stan Lee inclusion I made here? I gave myself goosebumps just thinking about it.
Any and all comments are welcome.