Chapter 15

My team and I rested on a small rock on the outskirts of route four. As per the usual, I had been switching my team around, training all of them as equally as I could. And wasn't that an awesome thing? I remembered the anime had briefly touched on the transfer capability of the Pokédex, but it seems like that had been forgotten after a few episodes. The games never even hinted at it until way late in the franchise.

Yet in this weird amalgam universe, it was as easy as pushing a few buttons. Currently, I had ralts, vulpix, geodude, paras, igglybuff and Cleffa with me, and I was more than pleased with their progress. Vulpix and ralts were far and away my most powerful Pokémon. Vulpix' mastery of fire and illusion was awe inspiring, and ralts' own psionic abilities were astonishing. We had been focusing more on her fairy type attacks, the natural playfulness and whimsy of my first partner coming out in full force.

Geodude was becoming a stone cold bruiser. His anemic geokinesis had really shaped up in the week since mt moon, and he constantly used it to bulk up his already hefty size. We had continued to focus on his defense.

Paras was difficult for me at first, but as I got to know her better, I began to be better able to use her abilities to their fullest. Admittedly, I wasn't very good at using powders and traps, which was paras' strength, in battle. Training with paras had forced me to be more of a planner than I was used to. But in time, we both had become masters of covert status effects. We had focused on dialing down the thickness of her powders, while upping their potency, effectively turning the battlefield itself into a giant trap. She had initially been rather docile, but lately she was becoming more aggressive.

Cleffa was the secret master of our success. He had come to me already knowing gravity, and I had been quick to capitalize by using it to increase the resistance of my and all my Pokémon's training. Currently, we were up to four times earth normal gravity, and my little warriors were turning into absolute monsters as a result. He also had almost doubled in size since his capture, so I knew he would probably evolve soon.

Igglybuff was another difficult Pokémon to train. Most of his abilities were sonic, being based as they were in his voice. Sing, disarming voice, uproar, and growl were his favorite attacks, and he had quickly increased in his skill with them.

I had also been keeping in contact with the oak ranch, where raticate had apparently transformed into something of a drill sergeant. From what I was able to gather, she had taken the alpha Beedrill incident and my run in with team rocket, well, badly. So she had been running my reserve Pokémon through a tortuous training regimen that was evidently so bad that training with me was something of a break.

Raticate had proudly demonstrated it to me. As she casually crunched a boulder in half. A boulder the same size as her. With her teeth. Terrifying.

But it was paying dividends, because all my Pokémon were in peak condition and glowing with health.

Misty had taken off for cerulean, to "take care of something". I chose not to ask about it, but it seemed important. I knew I'd most likely be fighting her within the week for a badge, so I left her to her own devices.

It was as we were resting that I got a rather nasty surprise. As my Pokémon were lightly napping, I was suddenly squeezed in an iron grip. I was quickly covered in purple coils as a sinister sybilant sussuration slid slyly into my ears.

"Ekansssssssss."

Crap.

Ralts, help! I cried mentally, my breath having been crushed from my lungs. With a shout, my stalwart partner jumped into action, launching a psyshock at the ekans. Which was currently wrapped around me. Meaning I got hit with the worst of it too.

I stumbled around aimlessly, the slightly dazed serpent dangling from my shoulders, straight into a tree. A tree that, unfortunately, was full of angry Mankey. Fuck my life.

So there I was, stumbling around, my head pounding, my lungs burning, an angry pig monkey beating on both me and the giant snake wrapped around me, when I trip on a hole in the ground and fall flat on my face.

Luckily enough, the ekans was beaten enough that I was able to squirm out of its grip, which freedom I then used to sock the mankey square in the face.

This was a mistake.

The mankey flew at me in a furious, well, fury, wailing on me with all four limbs and tail. Meanwhile, my Pokémon were stuck staring at me in shock.

I had had enough. I'd had all I could stands, I couldn't stands no more, to quote a famous sailor. I flew into a rage of my own, grabbing the mankey by the tail, whirling him around, and tossing him straight up, where he then slammed into the ground.

I stood shakily, huffing heavily as I tried to calm down. I lobbed two pokeballs at the two Pokémon, quickly capturing them and transporting them to the ranch.

"Where were you guys?" I asked my warriors, half serious and half joking. "I'm tired, I'm sore, this day can just go screw itself. I'm going back into the city." And so I did.

Only to fall into the dirt again as a curious sandshrew poked her head out of her hole. Which I had just tripped on. Again.

Friends and neighbors, I was this close to just crying.

And the damn sandshrew wouldn't stop laughing at me.

Later that evening, I trudged my weary way into the Pokémon center, bruised and beaten. I dropped my six Pokémon off at the counter and promptly collapsed onto the nearby couch.

Only to be poked by a laughing sandshrew.

"Oi, why don't you give me a break, huh?" This particular sandshrew had followed me back to cerulean, laughing at me the whole way. "Cmon, go home. Leave me alone. Haven't I suffered enough?"

"Shrew. Sand." She shook her head.

"Please?"

"Shrew. Sand. Sandshrew."

I groaned. "I swear, i keep meeting the odd ones." The sandshrew giggled at me. I got a devious idea. "Say, you know, I've got this primo deal with a Pokémon professor. Any Pokémon I catch get to relax at this gorgeous ranch. Free food. Wide open spaces. Protection from predators. You interested?"

"Shrew!" She jumped up and down, excitedly, before tapping the button on one of my empty pokeballs, capturing herself, and teleporting away. "Heheheh. Sucker."

Anger-of-the-Boughs was not having a good day. After his humiliating defeat at the hands of a helpless human, he had been ignominiously captured and found himself in hell.

"Cmon you damn ape! What, you wanna live forever? Move it move it MOOOOOVE IT!" A long wormlike tail cracked the air in half an inch from his hind end. He looked over at Fangs-in-the-Tall-Grass and the new girl, Ground-Mouse, both also face down in the dirt.

"I think this run may actually kill me."

"You think that's *huff huff* bad? Try it with no limbs!"

"Worth it. That human was too hilarious to pass up. I can't wait to see what he gets himself into next! Hahahahahaha!"

"Get up off my forest floor you maggots! The ruck march ain't even half over yet! I've seen slowpoke move faster!"

"Groan."

Scott's Pokédex:

Caught: Squirtle, Caterpie, Metapod, Butterfree, Weedle, Kakuna, Beedrill, Pidgey, Pidgeotto, Rattata, Raticate, Spearow, Fearow, Ekans, Pikachu, Sandshrew, Nidoran(F), Nidorina, Nidoran(M), Nidorino, Vulpix, zubat, paras, Mankey, geodude, Pichu, Cleffa, Igglybuff, Ralts