Olivia walked back to the group just in time for the surgeon to come out with an update.
"We're still working on him. Bullet retrieval was tricky, but it's out. We are just repairing the damage, but he had significant blood loss. We need to transfuse him, but after that bus accident earlier we are running dangerously low on any type A."
Liv had her arms wrapped around her, trying to process the relayed information. "He and I have the same blood type. I can donate."
Bell looked over at her questioning. Olivia shrugged, "We were partners for twelve years. We know each others' blood type." She also wanted to mention this was not his first time getting shot, but she was too anxious to say anything else.
"That's great. Come with me and we will get you set up for donation real quick." Liv followed him, feeling better now that she could help in some way. She didn't mention she just puked her guts out. Probably not important, and she needed to do this.
The blood donation went smoothly. Her empty stomach made her lightheaded, but she didn't care. By the time she made it over to sergeant Bell and her team, Whelan had been patched up. He waited in a wheelchair with everyone else. As she approached he immediately began apologizing, "Captain I'm sorry. I was right there, but,"
Liv cut him off, "Whelan it's not your fault. Believe me. I had his back for more than a decade and he still managed to end up in the hospital more than once."
Whelan still looked like he was dying of guilt, but Liv couldn't emotionally take care of anyone else right now. Ayanna touched her elbow, "Sit Liv. You just gave blood and I don't need another cop admitted to the hospital today."
Liv nodded, but felt so antsy it was difficult to sit. "Did anyone call his kids?"
"Not yet." Bell answered, "Fin told us to wait until you got here before calling anyone else."
Great. She didn't want to call his kids. Losing their mother was enough, they couldn't lose their dad too. They might not forgive her, but she decided no one was calling until he at least came out of surgery. How long had she been here? She glanced at her watch. She should be exhausted, but she still had the hum of adrenaline coursing through her. This morning felt like a million years ago. Tears stung the corners of her eyes as she remembered kissing him. Holding him. Her train of thought derailed when a pair of surgeons came around the corner, pulling their scrub caps off their heads.
Time moved slowly again. She didn't breathe. She didn't move.
"He made it through, but it was a little touch and go for a while." Liv almost cried in relief. Later. She could cry later without all eyes on her.
"He's in the ICU. I'm optimistic about recovery, but we need to watch closely for infection. We can have one person in the ICU at a time. Is his family here?"
Olivia was about to say no, but Ayanna nudged her with her elbow, "Yeah Liv's here." She wanted to cry again. Hadn't Elliot told her she was family last week? It felt so long ago.
"Come with me." A red headed nurse came around the corner with a clipboard. "Tessa will take you back. She will be taking his vitals through the night."
Tessa smiled and waved her over. Liv wished she could smile in return but she felt too damn tired. She tried not to fall over before making it to Elliot's room. Tessa opened the door, but Liv hesitated. She'd seen him in the hospital a dozen times with various injuries, but things have changed. Then, he was her partner, and that was everything, but now? Now, they were so much more than that. Even if it didn't have a label. She calmed her nerves and took a step through the door.
q...
Elliot awoke feeling sluggish and slow. Light from the window felt impossibly bright. His lower abdomen felt like someone had reached inside and scrambled everything. He opened his eyes wider and noticed a delicate hand grasping his. Clinging really. Olivia's head laid next to their intertwined hands, her hair spread haphazardly. As she slept her brow held a hard line of worry. He hated that he was the reason for all the stress and worry. He took the time to watch her sleep. They had both aged, but she was as beautiful as the day they met, maybe more so. He thanked God for her presence in his life. He felt in awe that this beautiful, strong, compassionate woman cared about him, wanted him. Heaven knows he didn't deserve her.
She shifted in her sleep and mumbled something sounding like his name. His heart practically burst. For the rest of his life, he wanted his hand in hers, and his name on her lips. He meant to let her sleep but he couldn't help lifting his hand to her face. His thumb brushed across her lips and his heart beat faster at the memory of kissing her, and he wondered how long until she would let him love her. Really love her.
The movement of hand on her face caused her eyes to flutter open. He hated that he was the cause of her red puffy eyes and tear stained cheeks.
"Hey," he whispered. His throat felt dry. She said nothing, but tears began to well up in her eyes. He wanted to pull her into his arms, and prove he was okay and alive, but damn it, he couldn't lift himself enough to even try. Instead he pulled gently on her hand, "Hey, come here." She hesitated. "Liv. I need you right here. He motioned to the space next to him.
She nodded while she wiped the tears freely streaming down her face. She carefully climbed in the hospital bed next to him. He tried not to wince in pain, knowing she would immediately leave. Suffering any pain was worth it to hold her right now. She turned her face into his shoulder and cried. He pulled his arm tightly around her and whispered, "Hey. I'm okay. We're okay. I'm here. I'm not going anywhere." He kissed the crown of her head and continued to whisper comforting words into her hair.
Her tears began to dry, and he thought she fell asleep again, but an occasional shuddered breath let him know she still wasn't okay. Her head remained tucked beneath his chin, until her body began to calm. He felt her hand move to his cheek and her warm brown eyes met his. She pressed a lingering kiss to his lips. She pushed back another erupting sob. She pressed her forehead to his. "Don't ever scare me like this again." She sniffled softly. "I can't do this life without you. Never again."
Tears pricked at the corners of his eyes. Again he felt that feeling of redemption. Her love, love he never expected to earn, pulled him from the darkness that always clouded his turbulent life. He pulled her into him, kissing her with meaning, hoping she understood everything words couldn't convey.