Chapter Three | first day part two

Esme led me to my next class of the day, which happened to be Biology with Mr. Banner. I didn't know I would end up sharing my second to last class of the day with one of the Cullens.

Not just any Cullen, I shared the class with the one sibling that had gotten up from his cafeteria table and left the cafeteria entirely. I didn't know his reasoning and I tried to keep myself from thinking about it too much, because it might have nothing to do with me. It would only make me feel stressed about it, and I already had enough stress in my life to begin with.

Mr. Banner was waiting for me in the open-door frame of the class when Esme pushed me down the hallway where the biology classroom was. Just like the other men in the school there wasn't anything special about him. He looked like any other teacher that taught Biology.

Sure, he was one of the younger teachers but there was nothing that made me want to sigh at my desk and twirl one of my pieces of hair with my finger while staring at him dreamily like in those student/teacher novels that some of my classmates read back in Phoenix.

"Good afternoon, Esme and Miss Swan. Do you prefer Isabella or Bella?" Mr. Banner probed, receiving a nervous response from me, "B-Bella."

"Very good, I'll remember that. You'll have the lab table with Edward."

Mr. Banner moved out of the way after he said this, allowing Esme to push me into the classroom so she could lead me to the table where I would be sitting for the rest of the semester.

My eyes landed on an elegant, figured boy sitting at the table I would be sitting at. He was auburn haired, with large golden eyes and soft features for a boy, though there was still an edge of masculinity that was upon his symmetrical features. He was dressed in an expensive sweater, dark washed jeans and designer shoes. His hair was messy on his head, and he gave me a curious look when I finally reached him, with Esme behind me.

"Good afternoon, Edward. This is Bella," Esme spoke, her ethereal voice another reminder how she and her foster children along with niece and nephew and husband all seemed as though they were from another world entirely.

Or they were like they were an undiscovered species that hadn't been found, so they were able to blend into society without issues.

"Good afternoon, Mom. It's nice to meet you Bella," Edward remarked, though his voice was strained near the end when Esme made sure I was placed properly in front of the lab table. I had an elevated wheelchair, so I was able to be at the height as the rest of my classmates without any issues.

Mr. Banner came striding into the classroom, pushing his glasses up on the top of his nose so he could see better without them falling off. He cleared his throat, gaining the attention of all his students without any issues.

He studied them before remarking, "good afternoon, everyone. As you can see, we have a new student, but that's all we are going to say about her. If she wants to talk to you then let her come to you, and you do not come to her."

A part of me was insulted with how he was speaking about me. He was acting as though I was an animal in a petting zoo who could be moody and stay away from the children. If I were in the mood to, I would go to the children and let them socialize with me. He didn't seem as though he was realizing what he was saying, but I could feel Esme place her hand down next to my hand, letting me know that she was there if I needed her, but she wouldn't touch me without my permission.

I relaxed when Mr. Banner started a lecture about Cellular Anatomy, something I had learnt about right before I had moved here to Forks. Besides I wasn't bad at science per say but it wasn't as though I was getting just A and B pluses. Sometimes I got a C but then again that was something that was average, so it made me feel better.

The entire time I was in Biology, Edward was as stiff as though he was a statue. Esme would keep giving him glares even now and then, as though she was trying to guilt him into talking to me. He flickered his eyes towards me and then Esme, and there was complication that was upon his features though he never said anything to me.

Once class was over Esme pulled me out into the hallway before she went towards Edward. She moved as though she was Moses parting the red sea because everyone moved out of the way. She began to say something to Edward, something that seemed to make him realize he was in the wrong to just completely give me the cold shoulder.

I watched with intrigue as Edward finally came over to me, his eyes flickering towards Esme. She brought her hand up and motioned for him to talk to me. I blushed and went to duck my head down but at the last minute knew I shouldn't do that. Esme had brought him over so he could apologize to me, I wanted to look at him eye-to-eye. It was the least I could do for Esme.

Edward came up to me with a sheepish look upon his handsome features, one of his hands coming up so he could rub the nape of his neck. "Bella, I want to apologize for the way I was acting in Biology. There's no excuse for me when it comes to the way I acted."

"I-It's okay."

Edward frowned when he saw this, before he shook his head out of free will instead of the pressure his foster mom would have for him to correct his manners. "No, it's not okay, Bella. No one should make you feel uncomfortable or be mean to you."

I made a distressed noise, not liking the extended attention I was getting from the handsome boy in front of me. He was quite beautiful, in a guy manner and I was getting flustered. I had never gained the attention of boys in a positive way back in Phoenix, having one that told me something like that only made me blush brighter.

"Thank you for apologizing to Bella but we need to head off to the library. I'll see you when I get home," Esme said, before she leant over and kissed Edward on the cheek in a loving manner. She went away and pushed me down the hallway.

The time I was in the library, within the same study room that had been assigned to me, I couldn't help but have my mind flicker to the way Edward had looked at me. Alice and Jasper were respectful to me, they didn't talk to me when I sat with them in the cafeteria. Edward on the other hand had been so weird when I sat next to him in Biology, as though it was painful for him to be in the same room as me. Which wouldn't make any sense at all.

I knew Esme had Edward apologize to me, but it only made me embarrassed even more. I didn't want him to do that, I didn't want him to tell me my feelings were valid. I didn't know him, and he was only apologizing to me because his foster mom was standing next to us, as though letting him know we wouldn't be leaving the hallway corridor until he apologized.

Eventually school ended and Esme pushed my wheelchair into the front office so we could hand my slip to Mrs. Cope. Yet we both paused and looked at the person that was standing in front of the counter, noticing the familiar shade of red hair. Edward apparently had decided to come after all and see if he could change his class, he shared with me for another period.

Tears came from my tear ducts and fell down my face, wondering if the niceness he had shown me earlier was nothing more than faux. He was only apologizing to me because his foster mom was in front of me. Esme bent down and placed her hand onto my shoulder, quietly pulling out a silk handkerchief to wipe away my tears. I moved my head away from her, not wanting her help.

"I'm sorry, Mr. Cullen but I can't change your biology class for another period of the day. Oh hello, Esme and Bella!"

Edward stiffened from where he was before he slowly turned around, his eyes landing on Esme standing next to me with an unimpressed look upon her pale and perfect features. I on the other hand was looking down at my hands now, knowing there was nothing I wanted more to do than to be home and, in my bed, away from the rest of the world.

"Edward, I would like to talk to you outside. Bella, I'll be right back," Esme told me before she walked over to Edward and grabbed him by the arm and yanked him outside.

Mrs. Cope came around the counter before slowly pulling my slip out from my hands and going back behind the counter so she could put away the slip of paper. I stayed where I was, my fingers intertwining together while I waited for Esme to come back into the front office.

When Esme came back into the front office, she apologized for the way that Edward had acted, before she pushed my wheelchair around, so I was able to go through the front office doors. My eyes scanned around the doors that were glass to see if I could find Edward lingering so he could apologize to me once again. He wasn't there.

"I'm sorry about Edward, Bella. His father and I didn't raise him to be this way. You don't have to worry about him again. If he doesn't act better by the end of the week then we can change your partner for another," Esme explained, not knowing how this was making me feel worse instead of feeling better. It made me feel even more guilty.

The ride back home was filled to the sound of classical music that was playing. I smiled some at the music, which didn't sound as though it was composed by one of the greats. The pianist was someone who was beautiful when it came to their talent. I wondered who composed this music, and I wanted to meet them.

"Composer?"

Esme smiled some at how I had decided to ask about the composer after all. She glanced at me with warmth in her features before she said, "Edward. He's a very talented boy. He's made multiple compositions, has one for each of his siblings and even his father and I."

I didn't respond to this, not knowing how to feel about this either. Edward was very talented, and he seemed as though he was a deep person. Yet he seemed to have given me the cold shoulder and didn't seem as though he liked having a disabled person who was sitting next to him.

"Why does he hate me?"

I hadn't realized I had said this aloud, only for Esme to pull off to the side of the road and turn to look at me as though I had just told her the worst news. As though I had told her I just found out I was diagnosed with cancer. It made me feel a little uncomfortable.

"Oh, sweetie, Edward doesn't hate you. He's going through a hard time right now. He's not like Alice, he's more like Jasper."

Esme waited patiently for me to say something, but I merely stayed quiet. She sighed as if she knew there wasn't anything else she could say. She wanted to defend her foster son, but it was obvious he was out of line. She didn't continue, instead she drove me towards the house, knowing she should not mention her children anymore.

Arriving at the house once more, Esme helped me out of her van after she had gotten my wheelchair out. She pushed me up the ramp and into the house, where I wasn't welcomed with Leigha. She must have still been in the clinic. My body slumped at this knowledge, though I was surprised when Esme stayed with me until Leigha came home.

"Thank you for staying here until I finish work. I had to stay a little later than normal," Leigha explained as she entered the house with her scrubs still on. She had a little bit of tiredness that emitted from her, but she still seemed as though she was happy to see me.

"Of course! Bella is a delight to be around with. I'll leave you to it. I'll come and pick you up tomorrow," Esme informed me as she reached her hand out and put it on mine. I didn't pull my hand away from her, angry with how she touched me.

She left the house and Leigha pushed me into the kitchen so she could get me a snack. It wasn't anything that had too much flavor. It was just something that could hold me from hunger until dinner would come. She would be making a meatloaf along with some sides that were canned, nothing that was too hard to make.

Once I had eaten my afternoon snack, Leigha pushed me into the living room and picked up the television remote before asking me what channel I wanted to watch. I told her to go onto Cartoon Network since I always loved watching cartoons. Especially ones that were flashbacks from when I was little, it made me think of happier times when I would be staying up here with Charlie.

Charlie came home not too long later, popping his back a little bit from the fact that he was stressed from the long day he had. He beamed brightly at me and came over before he kissed me on the head, allowing me to know he was glad he was home. I blushed some and he chuckled from the shyness I had before he went upstairs to change out of his uniform and into some lounge clothes.

Coming downstairs, Charlie asked permission if he could change the channel. Nodding my head to allow him I was okay with that; he changed the channel to the local news. I didn't pay attention to what was on the news, knowing there wasn't anything important happening. I didn't really care about the news to begin with, but I wanted to let Charlie watch whatever he wanted to.

An hour later I was sitting at the kitchen table, with the meatloaf in front of me. Charlie was talking about how the day had gone, that there wasn't really anything to report about at the police station. Leigha was talking about the clinic but after thinking for a minute I couldn't help but ask about the Cullens some more, making them turn their attention towards me.

"Why did something happen?"

Leigha probed me quietly, her eyes showing nothing more than concern. I shrugged awkwardly and dipped my head down before deciding to shake my head. I didn't want to mention it after all.

"The Cullens have been really nice since they moved here two years ago from Alaska. They've always been quiet, reserved. Please, Bella, if something happened let me know," Charlie pleaded to me, his brown eyes staring imploringly into mine.

I closed my eyes and imagined I was writing in a diary, before I let them know how Edward had treated me. Charlie growled in anger at how Edward had been. I knew he would end up being on his shit list if he kept ignoring me all because of my cerebral palsy though Esme hadn't just outright said it was because of my disability.

Once I was finished Charlie went to say something only for Leigha to give him a look, one that let him know he shouldn't show how angry he was about Edward. Esme had made sure for Edward to apologize but other than that there wasn't anything else she could do. Edward had to actually mean what he had said, and though he had said it like he meant it when we were in the hallway, he still had decided to go to the front office and ask to change the only class he had with me.

I finished eating the rest of dinner and went upstairs with Leigha. Charlie went into the living room and changed the channel to one of the sports' channels. He was focused on the television once I had made it to the top of the stairs on the chair lift. He knew I was in good hands when it came to Leigha, she had been more than helpful so far, and I only knew her for two nights now.

Going upstairs, Leigha took me into my bedroom and helped me change out of my school clothes and into some pajamas. She sat me down onto the bed and then brushed out my hair to make sure there weren't any tangles that were in it. She made sure to keep the subject off of the Cullens, knowing they were a touchy subject.

Instead, she opened my backpack and looked through all the different subjects and their assignments I had been given. I knew that my workload for schoolwork would be a lot less than the rest of my classmates. I had learnt in time to appreciate this instead of feeling as though I should be ashamed of having a less amount of workload.

"Esme took some good notes for you. Oh and Mr. Mason had made you an audiotape. Let's go ahead and play," Leigha decided before she picked up my tape player that was on my nightstand, knowing the tape player was always on my nightstand.

I had times when I would be in elementary and middle school where my teachers wouldn't put in the effort to make audio tapes for me. I would often forget what the teachers were telling me because my attention span was worse when I was younger, so I would often have bad grades when it came to pop quizzes.

My seventh-grade helper, Ms. Anderson had gotten angry enough that the teachers didn't do this for me. She had a requirement for teachers that had long lectures and had to make tapes for me in the future. Ones that weren't long were of course written by Ms. Anderson. She didn't want me to feel worse about my disability, and it helped me with my self-esteem some.

I had to be honest though. Seeing Esme made me miss Ms. Anderson. I had wished that Ms. Anderson was my permanent helper and would transition to the high school with me. She hadn't done so, and my helper back in Phoenix didn't cause enough of an emotional connection to me that I had already dismissed them by the time I was in Renee's van on the way to the airport.

"Bella, do you want to stay home tomorrow? I'm sure–"

"No."

"No?"

"Not a coward."

Leigha nodded her head a moment later, she was glad I was being stubborn when it came to this. I didn't want her to feel as though I was going to plead for her to keep me home tomorrow, for her to stay home tomorrow. She had patients that were at the clinic, she had a job. She was needed elsewhere and even though I wouldn't have a good relationship with Esme she still was there for me today. She had been there for me just like Ms. Anderson had been.

We didn't stay awake much longer, since I would have to get up earlier than most teenagers so I could get ready for the day. Leigha picked out my outfit for tomorrow, I didn't have a true opinion towards it. It would be just another hoodie with a shirt underneath it, nothing that was too stylish. At least back in Phoenix I could wear shorts and t-shirts, despite the fact that it would show how lose my body was with my muscles.

Leigha brushed my teeth for me and put me underneath the bed, pulling the bed cover in a way where it wouldn't make me become sweaty and hot in the middle of the night. It had happened before in the past and my distressed sounds would wake Charlie up so he could get the covers comfortably. Renee on the other hand ignored me, going back to sleep, while Phil would make sure to come into my bedroom and fix the covers for me.

I didn't know what I expected when I closed my eyes, but when my dream started, I hadn't expected one thing: I was normal. I didn't have Cerebral Palsy.

I was in the thick woods of Forks, or at least I thought it was. I was dressed still in my pajamas, and I moved quietly, almost like a ghost in the woods, as my brown eyes scanned everything around me. I soaked in the fact that my feet could move against the ground and not stay against my wheelchair footrest. The cool air came and ruffled my dark hair, enough for me to close my eyes.

"Bella."

My eyes opened, revealing Esme standing in front of me along with Edward and Alice on either side of her. Alice had a look of sadness upon her features, along with Esme but Edward had a look in his eyes that let me know he had made his decision. He was going to do something that would harm me, something that I wouldn't like in the end.

"What's happening? Why are you here? Why do you look like that?" I demanded, confident in my dream. I straighten up my back and my chin upwards.

"We're sorry, but we couldn't see a different way for this. It won't be too painful. I promise you will be able to rest better," Alice confessed with tears rising in her tear ducts, sniffling some as the rain came crashing down from above us, setting the scene perfectly.

"What do you mean?"

I couldn't help but demand again, anger resonating from me before sadness mixed in with it. I knew a moment later what was happening, they were going to kill me. I was going to die in my dream. The only time I was free, I would end up being killed even in my subconscious.

Edward came forward, his golden irises darkening some. Him along with the others looked even more inhuman, allowing me to realize that they weren't human. Whatever they were, they were going to make sure to kill me to ease the pain of my cerebral palsy.

Edward appeared in front of me a second later, as I tripped backward and almost fell back onto a moss-covered log. The moss-covered ground was wet, soaking, and was a slip hazard. I gasped as Edward wrapped one of his arms around my waist and pulled me upright.

"It will hurt for a moment, but I'll make sure it's quick. It's what you deserve," Edward told me before he reached his hand up. He ran his fingers through my hair in a soft manner before he turned my neck to the side and sunk his teeth into my skin.

Pain. So much pain.

Screw those stupid supernatural romance novels where women would basically become close to orgasm from the pleasure that hit them when a vampire would bite them. This wasn't beautiful, this wasn't something that anyone wanted. Edward held me carefully though, as though I was made of glass. Tears cascaded down my cheekbones. I wanted to live in this dream, I didn't want to wake up, before they appeared but now, I wanted to wake up.

I woke up, my eyes widened and my breathing heavy. I turned on my side, noticing that the window was cracked open an inch or two. I didn't think too much about it. Leigha might have opened the window, but I swore it was closed. No matter what, I knew my subconscious was telling me something.

AUTHOR'S NOTE: I hope you enjoyed the third chapter of 'AS I BREATHE'. There will be no romantic relationship between Bella and Edward. Well Bella won't harbor feelings for him, I don't know if I'll make him actually love her in the end.

as always: Twilight doesn't belong to me

-Emmy

ps: for those who are reading my 'harry potter' fanfictions those will be updated last. I'm making sure to update all my twilight fanfictions one chapter before working on those three. That will be pattern. Besides, 'Handle with Care' is nearing its end. And 'Petit Papillon' only has around 8 chapters in the Eclipse section.