Author's Note: Sorry this took a while.
Before we begin, I have an announcement to make. In my last chapter, I announced that I would be doing a rotation of updates with this and the other Marvel/Disney Show crossovers. However, it has been pointed out to me that it would take too long, and after going through it once, I agree. So I am revoking the rotation and decided to update these chapters whenever. After all, I don't want to wait another month to work on this.
Anyway, I'm glad I finished this around the beginning of the new Ms. Marvel show on Disney+. I liked it and I'm looking forward to the rest of the season.
Hope you all enjoy this chapter. Any and all comments are welcome.
Dipper and Mable sat in their room eagerly staring at the pink curtain the latter had set up. After a few minutes, Kamala moved the curtain away. She wore her blue domino mask along with a blue outfit that had red arm and leg sleeves. Across the blue part of her outfit, she displayed a yellow lightning bolt. She wore a red scarf around her collar.
"What do you think?" she asked.
"Whoa! That's pretty cool!" Dipper said.
"Yeah. Where'd you get that outfit anyway?" Mabel asked.
"Oh, this?" Kamala asked showing off her outfit. "I fashioned it out of my burkini."
"Your what-what?" Dipper asked.
"Burkini. It's Muslim swimwear for women. My mom bought like three of these for me when the summer started, so she won't mind if I'm missing one. I even added this lightning bolt decal as a reference to Captain Marvel's original symbol."
"All right." Dipper said. "So you've got the powers."
"You've got the fabulous costume." Mabel said.
"Now, all you need are a name and your first hero mission."
"Well, I was thinking of a name. I was thinking… Ms. Marvel. That was my fantasy name in all my fanfics where I insert myself as Captain Marvel's sidekick. But as for the first mission, it could be anything."
"Too bad crimes don't just automatically happen like in Duck-tective." Mabel said.
"Dudes! Come on down!" Soos called from downstairs. "You'll never guess what I found!"
"Uh… In a minute, Soos." Kamala said after heading back to the curtain. She quickly began changing back to her normal clothes.
The kids followed Soos down the hallway until they stopped at an old door. They all looked with interest.
"Never seen that before." Kamala said.
"Me either." Soos said. "I was, like, cleaning up when I found this secret door hidden behind the wallpaper. It's crazy bonkers creepy." He put his hand on the doorknob and turned it.
The door creaked open revealing a dark room full of still figures. A close look at one of them revealed a hulkish Chinese man in heavy armor.
"Is that… a wax statue of Genghis Khan?" Kamala asked.
"They're all wax figures." Mabel said looking around. "They're so lifelike."
"Except for this one." Dipper said observing a figure wearing only boxers and a white undershirt. Suddenly, its arm raised up and waved scaring everybody.
"Hello." The figure chuckled revealing his old face and red fez. "It's just me, your Grunkle Stan. I see you knuckleheads found my old wax museum."
"Wax museum?" Kamala asked.
"Yep. It was the Mystery Shack's most popular attraction… before I forgot about it. We got al lthe classics here. Genghis Khan. Sherlock Holmes. Some kind of… I don't know, goblin man?"
"That's Larry King." Kamala said. "What happened?"
"Well, the wax museum was working great at first." Stan explained. "Every day, people would come in and check out the exhibits. But over time, people just stopped coming. Figured it was best to keep the wax guys in storage."
"This place is pretty good." Kamala said looking around. "I wonder what…" Suddenly, she gasped upon seeing a wax statue of a blue-skinned man in a black spacesuit, green outlines, and an orange visor. She laughed excitedly checking it out from all angles. "NO WAY! IS THAT YON-ROGG?! YOU ACTUALLY HAVE A YON-ROGG WAX STATUE HERE?! THERE'S A WAX STATUE?!"
"Uh… I guess." Stan shrugged. "I don't know. That's the one wax statue that I can't interpret. I thought he was part of that sci-fi space travel TV franchise that's ben rebooted a dozen times."
"Mr. Pines, Yon-Rogg was Captain Marvel's archenemy in her early days. He was indirectly responsible for Carol Danvers getting alien powers and he's been obsessed with taking it from her ever since."
"Wow. I never knew Captain Marvel had wax statues." Dipper said.
"Ugh, you can fangirl over that later." Stan said. "But I haven't shown you my favorite: wax Abraham Lincoln. Over… OH, NO!" Stan suddenly found his favorite wax statue melted under the sunbeam from an open window. "Who left the window open? Wax John Wilkes Booth, I'm looking in your direction. Man, how do you fix a wax figure?"
"Cheer up, Grunkle Stan. Where's that smile?" Mabel asked playfully poking at her uncle's face. "Don't worry, Grunkle Stan. I'll make you a new wax figure from all this old wax."
"You really think you can make one of these puppies?" Stan asked.
"Grunkle Stan, I'm an arts and crafts master. Why do you think I always have this glue gun stuck to my arm?" Mabel raised her arm to show of her gun.
"I like your gumption, kid.
"I don't know what that means, but thank you."
"Well, this should be interesting." Kamala said.
After a long day of creative thinking, Mabel had found her inspiration. She sculpted her new wax statue to look exactly like her great uncle. Stan instantly liked the new model and showed it off publicly to the visiting town of Gravity Falls. But after the crowd realized they weren't given free pizza like they were promised on a flyer, they went into a riot on the way out. Thankfully, Stan got away unscathed and with every dollar he got from the event.
Later that night, Kamala stayed up in her bedroom sketching, drawing, and writing in her notebook. She kept her knees up to use her legs as a support for her notebook.
"I guess I'll need some one-liners. Like if I hit the bad guys with a giant hand, I could say 'Talk to the hand'. That'd be pretty good. I gotta write that one down." Suddenly, Kamala's phone rang and she immediately answered. "Hello?"
Dipper's voice answered. "Kamala, we need you to come to the Mystery Shack right now."
"What? Why?" Kamala asked.
"Because I think we just found your first crime."
"Someone really decapitated Wax Stan?" Kamala asked after talking to the twins at the Mystery Shack hallway. Right next to them, in the hallway, Stan was giving the information to the police officers, Sheriff Blubs and Deputy Durland.
"Yeah." Mabel said. "Grunkle Stan left to go potty, and when he came back, his wax twin was headless."
"The strange thing is, we can't find the head anywhere." Dipper said. "It's like the perpetrator took it for some reason."
"Grunkle Stan is telling the cops everything, but then, we thought this might be a good mission for you as a superhero." Mabel said.
Kamala rubbed her chin giving the idea some thought. "You know what? I think you're right."
The kids nodded before heading to the living room where Stan finished telling the police about the crime.
"Look, we'd love to help you folks," Blubs said, "But let's face the facts. This case is unsolvable."
"You take that back Sheriff Blubs!" Stan demanded angrily.
"You know, there may be someone who can help." Dipper said.
"Who, you?" Blubs asked. "Sorry, city boy, but leave the investigating to the grown-ups."
"Not me." Dipper said. "I'm talking about Ms. Marvel."
"Miss who?" Stan asked.
"Ms. Marvel." Mabel said. "A super-elastic crime fighter. She's new in town, so I'm sure you haven't heard of her."
"Kid, you know there's no such thing as superheroes, right?" Stan asked.
"Ms. Marvel's real enough, Mr. Pines." Kamala said. "I'm sure she'll be more than happy to help."
"We'll see about that." Blubs said.
Suddenly, the police radio buzzed. "Attention, all units. Steve is about to fit an entire cantaloupe in his mouth. Repeat, an entire cantaloupe."
"It's a 23-16!" Durland cried out before leaving the shack with his partner.
"Those two are really Gravity Falls' top law enforcers?" Dipper asked.
"Yeah." Kamala said. "Don't worry though. It's a classic trope in superhero stories. The police are either incompetent or unable to catch the crook, so it's up to the superhero to pick up the slack."
"Meh." Stan grumbled. "I don't really believe in superheroes, but if you kids think this Ms. Marvel can catch this crook, I say go for it."
Before putting on her costume, Kamala decided to take a look around the living room. There, she found a lumberjack ax and a set of footprints with a hole in the right foot.
"So whoever did this has a hole in their right shoe." Kamala said. "And this ax must be the murder weapon."
"Wait a minute. The lumberjack guy!" Mabel reminded.
"Of course!" Dipper said. "He was furious when he didn't get that free pizza."
"Furious enough for murder!"
"Are you guys talking about Manly Dan?" Kamala asked. "Be careful. That's Wendy's dad."
"Anyone's a suspect." Dipper said. "So where is Manly Dan?"
"Well, Wendy told me that this time of day, he hangs out at this biker joint downtown." Kamala answered.
"Then that's where we're going." Mabel said.
The three of them headed out where they ran into Stan trying to pull a coffin out of his car. "Hey, give me a hand with this coffin, will ya? I'm doing a memorial service for Wax Stan. Something small, but classy."
"Where'd you get a coffin?" Kamala asked.
"From the Valentino's." Stan said. "They just happily gave this coffin to me without question. It's like they're expecting someone to die. Honestly, those two scare me."
"Well, we're off, Grunkle Stan." Dipper said. "We're going into town to… find Ms. Marvel and interrogate the murderer."
"We brought an ax. Ree, ree, ree." Mabel said.
"Huh. This really doesn't seem like a thing a responsible parent would want you doing. Good thing I'm an uncle. AVENGE ME, KIDS! AVENGE MEEEEEE!"
Once the kids made it to the biker joint, Kamala changed into her Ms. Marvel costume. She then used her elastic powers to make herself taller to fool the bouncer. She convinced him she was an adult and he let her through. Kamala entered and looked around noting all the vicious-looking bikers sitting and giving each other glares.
"Yeesh." Ms. Marvel said to herself. "Good thing the twins are waiting outside. Oh, there's Dan."
Ms. Marvel approached Manly Dan who was playing an arcade arm wrestling game machine. He strained his arm throughout the whole conversation.
"Manly Dan. I'm Ms. Marvel, the town's newest hero."
Dan groaned. "Whatever you're selling, I'm not buying."
"What?" Ms. Marvel asked. "No. I'm just here to investigate a certain crime that took place. Where were you last night?"
"Punching the clock."
"You were at work?"
"No. I was punching THAT clock!" Manly Dan pointed outside to a bent clock was posted. It was stuck at a certain time.
"Ten o'clock. The time of the murder." Ms. Marvel reached into her backpack and pulled out the murder weapon. "So you've never seen this ax before?"
"Listen, little girl!" Manly Dan shouted. "I wouldn't pick my teeth with that ax! That ax is left-handed! I only use my right hand, THE MANLY HAND!" Dan ripped the fake arm out of the machine and beat it down while the local enthusiast, Tyler Cutebiker, cheered him on from the side.
"Get 'im. Get 'im."
Ms. Marvel heard enough. She headed out of the establishment and returned to Dipper and Mabel just outside.
"So what did you learn?" Dipper asked.
"Well, Manly Dan isn't the killer." Ms. Marvel said. "But he also told me that the ax is used by left-handed people. So whoever we're looking for is left-handed."
"Perfect." Dipper said. "All we gotta do now is find our left-handed suspect among all the guests at Grunkle Stan's party, and we've got our killer."
"We are on fire today!" Mabel said. "Especially you, Ms. Marvel. Not bad for your first crime-fighting job."
"Yeah. I might actually get used to this." Ms. Marvel said. "Now, let's find our killer."
Throughout the day, Dipper, Mabel, and Ms. Marvel had been going through town getting important information about people. They checked which hand they wrote with, they catch balls with, and that were uninjured. In the end, all but one suspect were eliminated. Through this process, they believed they found their murderer.
Ms. Marvel called the police and lead them to the front of a certain station. Blubs and Durland propped up next to the doors while Ms. Marvel, Dipper, and Mabel were right behind them.
"You kids better be right, or you'll never hear the end of it." Blubs said.
"Don't worry, sheriff. Everything points to this man." Ms. Marvel said.
The police officers nodded to each other before counting down. As soon as they reached the end of the countdown, they immediately broke through the door sticking their guns out.
"NOBODY MOVE! THIS IS A RAID!" Blubs shouted. This sudden intrusion scared the only man who was in the building, a gossip reporter named Toby Determined.
"Aah! What is this? Some kind of raid?"
"Toby Determined," Dipper declared, "You're under arrest for the murder of the wax body of Grunkle Stan."
"And you'll be sad to know that this crime has been foiled by Gravity Falls' very own hero, Ms. Marvel." Mabel said showing off her costumed friend.
"I don't understand." Toby said.
"Then let me break it down for you." Ms. Marvel said. "Your newspaper business was failing. You thought the Mystery Shack's new wax museum would help you, but it failed. So you decided to make your own headline. You broke into the Mystery Shack to decapitate Wax Stan. After that, you set up your article and waited for the announcement of the crime so you would be the first reporter to cover it. I knew the killer had to have a hole in his right shoe and was left handed. All the clues point to you, Toby. So I'd say… you're yesterday's news."
The Pines twins laughed. "Good one." Mabel commented.
"Boy, your knees must be sore… from jumping to conclusions!" Toby said. "I had nothing to do with that murder."
"Wait, what?" Ms. Marvel asked. "All the evidence points to you. Do you even have an alibi for last night?"
Toby was reluctant, but he eventually revealed his secret. He showed his own office security footage. In the video, Toby pulled out a secret cardboard cutout of Gravity Falls' top news reporter, Shandra Jimenez, and made out with it. The sight of it pretty much disgusted everyone who viewed it.
"Time stamp confirms it." Blubs said. "Toby, you're off the hook, you freak of nature."
"But… that doesn't make any sense." Ms. Marvel said. "What about the ax? Check for fingerprints."
"We did." Blubs said. "Turns out, there were no prints on the handle."
"No prints?" Dipper asked. "What's going on?"
"Hey, Toby," Durland said, "I got a headline for you: 'Cosplay Girl Wastes Everyone's Time'."
The policemen and the reporter laughed at the expense of Ms. Marvel, who hung her head shamefully. Dipper and Mabel comforted her.
Later that night, nearly the entire Mystery Shack staff gathered in a large room. There were rows of seats filled by Dipper, Mabel, Soos, Kamala (who was out of her costume), and every other wax statue from the museum. Right before them was a coffin where the headless body of Wax Stan laid in.
Stan Pines stood before the crowd to give his speech. "Kids, Soos, lifeless wax figures, thank you all for coming. Some people might say it's wrong for a man to love a wax replica of himself."
"They're wrong!" Soos cried out passionately.
"Easy, Soos. Wax Stan, I hope you're picking pockets in wax heaven." Stan wiped his eye breaking out into tears. "I'm sorry. I promised myself I wouldn't cry!" He ran out with Soos following him with comfort.
Kamala slumped down with a big frown on her face. "Man, I really blew it. Some superhero I turned out to be."
"Hey, it's not your fault." Mabel said. "You did everything you could."
"Mabel's right." Dipper assured. "You may not have caught the real crook, but you'll get your big break."
"You guys don't understand." Kamala said stepping out of the chair. "I failed to find someone who messed up a wax statue. I looked like a total idiot in front of the police. They're never going to take me seriously if there's a real supervillain out there. I just don't know what to…" She stopped when something caught her eye. She leaned to Wax Stan's body and noticed something about its feet. "What's this? Wax Stan's show has a hole in it."
"All the wax statues have that." Mabel said. "It's where the pole thingy attaches to their stand dealies."
"Wait a minute." Dipper gasped. "What has a hole in its foot and no fingerprints?"
Kamala widened her eyes realizing what Dipper's trying to say. "Wait! Then that means the real killers are…"
"Standing right behind you?"
The kids turned to what they first thought were just lifeless wax statues. Now, they saw them finally move. They stood from their chairs moving as well as any human being. The wax statues surrounded the kids menacingly.
Dipper looked around recognizing all the walking, talking statues that approached. "Wax Sherlock Holmes. Wax Shakespear. Wax Coolio."
"And Wax Yon-Rogg." Kamala gasped seeing the wax villain walk up in front of the crowd.
"Well done, children. You've unburied the truth. And now, we are going to bury you! And since we're clearing the air, you're right." He snapped his fingers and another wax statue tossed something into his open hand. It was the missing head of the wax Stan statue. "We did do it?"
"But how is this possible? You're made of wax." Dipper said.
"Are you magic?" Mabel asked.
Wax Yon-Rogg laughed. "Magic? The girl wants to know if we're magic." He suddenly raised his fist up and slammed it down on the coffin scaring the kids. "We're cursed!"
"Cursed?" Kamala asked.
"Cursed to come to life whenever the moon is waxing." Wax Yon-Rogg continued. "Your uncle bought us many years ago at a garage sale."
"A haunted garage sale, son." Wax Coolio emphasized.
"Yes, thank you, Coolio." Wax Yon-Rogg said rolling his eyes. "Anyway, Stanford Pines purchased us from our previous owner and set us up on display in his wax museum. By day, we would be the playthings of humans."
"But when your uncle was asleep," Wax Coolio continued, "We would rule the night."
"Hey. Are you telling this story or am I?" Wax Yon-Rogg asked. "Anyway, it was an ideal life for us. But when the wax museum stopped making him money, Stanford locked us away. We've been cooped up in that dark room for ten years until you kids uncovered us. That's when we took our chance. We've been waiting an entire decade to get revenge on Stanford for locking us away and forgetting us." He held up Wax Stan's head. "But as you can see, we made a mistake and got the wrong guy."
"So you were trying to kill Grunkle Stan for real?" Dipper asked.
"You were right, Dipper. Wax people are creepy." Mabel said.
"Look, guys," Kamala said to the wax statues, "I get it. You're mad. But you guys should be better than this. Wax Sherlock, you always caught crooks, not become one. Wax Shakespear, you expressed yourself with your art, not with murder. You guys shouldn't be doing this."
"…You do realize we're just wax replicas and not the real versions of us, right?" Wax Sherlock asked.
"Oh, right." Kamala said.
"Enough!" Wax Yon-Rogg said. "Now that you know our secret, you must die."
The wax statues growled and began their approach closer to the kids. In a panic, the Pines twins grabbed random stuff from the nearest table and threw them. It wasn't until Dipper threw a pot of hot coffee at Wax Genghis Khan that any damage was done. The wax warlord's face began to melt and he yelled.
"That's it!" Mabel said. "We can melt them with hotty, melty things." She and Dipper took a pair of candles pointing them at the monsters.
"Do you really think those scare us?" Wax Yon-Rogg asked. "We're well too organized to be cut down by a trio of brats."
"But I can do this!" Kamala cried out as she made her fist grow bigger. She punched hard at the wax crowd and scattered them around the room. "Dipper! Mabel! I'll round up the creeps while you melt them!"
"Sounds like a plan." Dipper said.
Kamala stretched out her arms to wrap around Wax Larry King's body. Dipper swung his candle to knock his head off.
"Interview that, Larry King!" Kamala said.
Next, Kamala grabbed onto Wax Groucho Marx. She gave Mabel the chance she needed to cut through his body.
"Joke's on you, Groucho!" Kamala said.
"I've heard of a cutting remark, but this is ridiculous." Wax Groucho said before falling to the ground.
Kamala turned and saw Wax Genghis Khan rushing toward her. She sidestepped and tripped him over letting him fall and explode into the fireplace.
"Nice try, Genghis, but there's only room for one Khan in this Mystery Shack!" Kamala looked and saw Wax Yon-Rogg rushing out of the room. "There's one getting away! Can you two handle these jerks?"
"Don't worry about us!" Dipper said.
"Yeah!" Mabel said. "Just go and do what a hero does!"
Kamala nodded and ran in the same direction as Wax Yon-Rogg. She chased him to an attic storage room, but when she entered, he wasn't seen. She carefully crept in shifting her eyes left and right. Suddenly, a shadow immediately crept up and she turned too late to dodge the backhanded fist that knocked her down. She tried to get back up, but Wax Yon-Rogg planted his foot down on her.
"It's over, girl!"
"Maybe for you! Talk to the HAND!" Suddenly, Kamala grew her fist and pushed Wax Yon-Rogg off of her. The living wax figure recovered at the edge of the room right next to an open window. He then opened it and climbed up to the roof. Naturally, Kamala followed him.
The chase lead to the front of the Mystery Shack sign. Kamala thought she had Wax Yon-Rogg cornered, but the wax alien had her where he wanted her. He gripped the S on the Mystery Shack sign and knocked it over letting land right on top of Kamala. She tried to dodge, but it was too late. Her lower body was trapped under the S, and when Wax Yon-Rogg towered over her ready to strike her down, she knew she couldn't escape in time to stop him.
"Any last words?" Wax Yon-Rogg asked.
"…Got any sunscreen?" Kamala asked giving a smug grin.
"What?" Wax Yon-Rogg asked before feeling a drip of wax drop on his face. He suddenly realized that the hot summer sun was rising and already began to melt him starting with his hand.
"NO!" Wax Yon-Rogg attempted to flee, but Kamala found her chance to get out of the S from the sign. After knocking it to the ground, she extended her arms and wrapped them around Yon-Rogg's body. She lifted him up from the rooftop and into the hot beams. He tried to struggle, but despite his efforts, he was quickly melting. "NO! NO! NOOOOOOO!" Eventually, there was nothing left of him. All the wax from his body had been melted out of Kamala's arms. As soon as he was gone, Kamala took a breath and stood victoriously.
"Dang. I wish I had my costume on, because this would be a super-cool image of me."
Kamala returned just as Dipper and Mabel had destroyed the last wax statue. They smiled with her seeing how victorious she was.
"How are you feeling?" Dipper asked.
"Honestly… REALLY AWESOME!" Kamala cried out excitedly. "I just fought my very first supervillain and won! And it was a Captain Marvel villain too! This is the best first mission I could have ever imagined! And I owe it al to you kids for helping me get this far."
"Hey! What's all the screaming about?" Grunkle Stan asked as he entered. As soon as he saw the wax stains all around the room, he widened his eyes as wide as dinner plates. "HOT BELGIAN WAFFLES! WHAT HAPPENED TO MY PARLOR?!"
"Your wax figures turned out to be evil," Mabel said, "So we fought them to the death."
"I decapitated Larry King." Dipper said.
Stan gave a playful chuckle. "You kids and your imagination. What about you, Kamala? Anything you'd like to say?"
"Yes, actually. Ms. Marvel just came by and look what she found for us." Kamala said reaching behind her back. She pulled out Wax Stan's head which made the real Stan happy.
"My head! I missed this guy! I don't buy all that 'superpower' talk, but I guess this Ms. Marvel ain't all talk after all."
"Oh. Thank you." Kamala said before realizing what she said.
"Thanks? For what?" Stan asked.
"Uh… Oh, look! It's the police!" Dipper pointed outside. He was right. Blubs and Durland drove up in front of the mystery shack.
"Did your 'superhero' friend solve the case yet?" Blubs asked holding up a cup of coffee. "I'm so confident you'll say no, that I'm going to take a a long, slow sip from my cup of coffee."
"Actually, Ms. Marvel came by, and she did solve the case." Kamala said as she held up Wax Stan's head.
Blubs realized how big of a mistake it was to take a long, slow sip of his coffee. He gave a spit-take on his own partner who in turn spit back at him. The two of them cried out in pain as they drove away. The Mystery Shack gang laughed as they drove off.
"Wow. What a day." Kamala thought to herself. "I got my powers. I got the costume. I got a sweet superhero name. I fought my first crime. I fought my first supervillain. And I'm starting to gain a little rep from the town. I may not know where these powers came from, but one thing's for certain, I'm going to use them for good. Gravity Falls, prepare for your very own superhero."