I am posting a bit late today. This whole week was completely crazy and today was my son's birthday party. I did not edit as much as I usually do and I considered waiting until tomorrow to post, so I could edit some more, but tomorrow will be just as crazy, just like pretty much every day for the next week, but hopefully things will slow down after that. So, if I did not edit out as many mistakes as usually, I hope you can forgive me for it.

For this chapter, I had to go back to the prequel and draw up a timeline, because my head was starting to spin with all these flashbacks and side stories.

Just to clear up any confusion: During the flashback from three years ago, Missy is still married to her first husband (but will obviously be separating soon) and she is not yet expecting her second child (but will be soon). So, the husband that is being referred to, is not Robbie. He will probably make a short appearance in those flashbacks at some point though, since he started dating Missy when she was pregnant.

Other than that, this chapter will have a lot of Amy's inner dialogue about the situation she is currently in. So, not much Shamy. But there will be in the next one, that will take place in Medford again, after a small time jump.

Ooh Child
Things are gonna get easier
Ooh Child
Things'll get brighter

Balancing Heaven And Earth
Chapter 7 – "O-o-h Child"

Amy's POV

~ A little less than three years ago ~

"Thanks, Connie, but I have a lot of assignments to grade. Maybe another time."

Amy demonstratively got a stash of papers out of her schoolbag and put it on the kitchen table.

"You cannot fool me, Amy. I know you always grade those at school before you come home. You are coming with me tonight. End of story."

Amy huffed. This was ridiculous. Why was she even invited to this family dinner? She was not part of the family.

"Amy, this is the fifth time you are trying to get out of this dinner. If I don't bring you across the street soon, my daughter will think that I just made you up in my mind and then she will send me to a home because she thinks I'm crazy and can't take care of myself anymore. Do you really want to do this to an old lady?"

"Don't be so dramatic, Connie…", she said and rolled her eyes at her friend. "Your daughter greets me every morning when I drive to work. She knows I am real. But nice try."

Amy shook her head amused, when she saw Connie's expression. It was clear, her friend was still trying to come up with something that made her come to this dinner.

Usually, Connie was pretty good at that. Amy had gone bowling with her several times over the past weeks. She had gone out to dinner with Connie's friends from the senior center. Once, she had even attended a dance class that Connie's friend Ruth was teaching.

But that last thing had only been awkward. She had never danced with a man before, and the gentleman that had been assigned as her partner had stepped on her feet all the time.

"Just wait until Sheldon comes to visit.", Connie had promised. "My moonpie has always been an excellent dancer."

After Amy got over this name – what a coincidence, 'Sheldon' had to be a more popular name than she had thought – she sometimes wondered, if all the things Connie told her about her grandson were really true. Because she made him sound like some kind of superhero.

Not that it mattered anyway. It was not like she expected to socialize with that man anytime soon. She was Amy Farrah Fowler. Invisible to all men, unless they wanted to make fun of her or needed her to write their papers or something.

"Amy, please.", she was snapped out of her thoughts. "It would mean very much to me if you came with me tonight."

She looked at Connie surprised.

This was new. Usually, Connie either told her what to do or made funny remarks like the one before to get her to do things with her.

But now, she looked very serious.

"But this is a family dinner, Connie.", she protested. "I don't know why I am supposed to be there."

"Because I want you there, Amy.", Connie said softly. "I've been telling my family about you for weeks. My grandchildren really want to meet you."

Her grandchildren? That meant… could it be? Could the ominous Sheldon Tucker be in town for a visit?

Not that it changed anything. But maybe it could be interesting, talking to him about that documentary she had seen a few weeks ago. Or about that reactor, he had wanted to build as a child. Maybe she could mention – very casually of course – how cool it was that he tried to bake integrated circuits in an Easy Bake Oven.

"Uhm… well… if it's that important to you…", she said hoarsely.

She checked her watch. It was still twenty minutes before they had to be across the street.

Enough time to take a shower and maybe look if she could find the box where she kept her nicer dresses. Would it be rude to ask Connie if she could borrow a little bit of her make-up? Or even ask her to help apply it?

After all, this was a dinner invitation. It was only reasonable, wanting to look her best for the occasion.

By the time she was standing in front of the door across the street next to Connie, Amy was a nervous, jittery mess.

Not just because she would be meeting the man who – at least she suspected that – Connie was trying to set her up with. But she would also be meeting a bunch of strangers and she had no idea if Connie's family would be as accepting of her as she was.

Connie opened the front door, and they were greeted by the woman, Amy had sometimes seen in passing.

"You must be Amy.", the lady said with a bright smile. "Come in, you two."

"Hi.", Amy said and forced a smile. "Thanks for having me, Mrs. T…"

"Oh, enough with the formalities. Just call me Mary."

Amy rolled her eyes. She was raised to be polite and respect her elders. But apparently, this family just worked differently.

"Thank you for having me. Mary.", she said before she was led to the dining room.

She almost tripped over a little boy, maybe three years old, who was sitting on the floor, assembling the tracks of a wooden trainset.

She was about to apologize, but then she froze when the most beautiful woman she had ever seen walked up to her and started scolding the boy.

"Joshua, what have I told you about playing on the floor in the middle of the room. Look, our guest almost fell because of you."

The woman turned to her, and Amy could only stare. She was tall and thin and even though she was dressed casually, she looked so elegant. Like a supermodel. But more than just her beauty, Amy admired the bright smile that made her face light up and the hint of cheekiness in her eyes.

In that moment, all thoughts of Connie's mystery grandson disappeared. Because right then, Amy wanted nothing more than to be that woman's friend.

"Hi, I'm Missy.", the woman said and extended her perfectly manicured hand.

"H… hi…", Amy stuttered. "I'm Amy. I live across the street. With Connie."

"Right. Meemaw told me so much about you.", Missy said. "You're the science teacher that loves 'Little House on the Prairie'."

"Yes. Yes, that's me.", Amy said quickly, amazed that this goddess actually had cared to remember a few things that Connie must have told her.

"I never would have guessed.", Missy continued as she mustered Amy. "You're much prettier than the science teachers I had at school."

Pretty? This strikingly beautiful woman found her pretty?

"Are you a homosexual?", Amy blurted out.

The woman's eyes widened, and Amy could hear Connie gasp next to her.

'Way to go, Amy, you already blew that one.', she thought to herself.

"It's just that…", Amy started to explain. "It would be more… flattering… if you… uhm… were…"

She was unable to finish the sentence, the embarrassment was too great.

But then, the woman broke out in laughter.

"You weren't kidding about her, meemaw.", she said as she had calmed down again. Then she turned to Amy again. "No, I'm not a homosexual. But do me a favor and ask me again in front of my mother. She'll probably faint."

Amy had been smitten with Missy before, but now she was completely bedazzled.

This woman was everything. Beautiful. Witty. With a sense of humor. Probably really popular. And also, incredibly nice.

It was that moment when Amy decided, that yes, this woman was going to be her new bestie.

A little later, she found herself seated at the dinner table next to Connie who was chatting with Missy across from her. That's when she learned that Missy's husband, Joshua's father couldn't make it because he was on a motorcycle trip with his friends.

"You would think he'd learned his lesson when he missed Joshua's birth because of an accident. He's lucky to even be still alive.", Connie said with a frown on her face. "Remember, poor Sheldon's face when he had to assist instead of him."

"Yeah, poor Shelly.", Missy said dryly. "All the while I was having the time of my life, first while birthing my son without my husband present and then again when I found out he had shared pictures of me giving birth with all his friends."

"He did that?", Amy asked wide-eyed.

But the conversation was interrupted when Mary came out of the kitchen and started serving dinner.

It smelled delicious and after Mary led a short prayer, Amy was about to dig in when someone slipped into the room and sat down on the formerly empty chair on her left.

She almost dropped her fork when she took in the person next to her.

Gosh, she thought to herself, that family had incredibly good genes. He was so handsome. Tall. Broad shoulders. Hair like a rockstar.

And then it occurred to her, that this had to be the mysterious Sheldon Tucker. Genius. Dancer. Devoted grandson.

"Hoo… I mean, hello.", she croaked.

"Hi.", the man said and flashed her a friendly smile that was equally contagious as Missy's. "You must be Amy. Meemaw has told me so much about you."

"L… likewise…", she stuttered.

"Only good things, I hope.", the man said and winked at her.

"Y… yes… of course.", she nodded quickly, racking her brain for something interesting to say to him. "I'm so sorry to hear about your hamster."

"My hamster?", he asked. He was still smiling, but there was a hint of confusion in his eyes.

'Dammit, Amy… couldn't you just have complimented his hair or something?'

"Uhm… I mean… Connie told me how you blew up your hamster. That must have been horrible. But impressive too. That thing you've built must have been very powerful."

The man turned to his grandmother.

"Meemaw what other lies have you told this girl? As if I would ever blow up a hamster."

"But… didn't you try to build that CAT scanner?", Amy asked confused. Did Connie misremember? Or was she just telling made-up stories?

Amy looked at Connie who was just sitting there an amused expression on her face.

"Cat scanner? I thought we were talking about a hamster.", the man next to her said, shaking his head.

What? She thought that Sheldon was a genius, but apparently, he didn't even know what a CAT scanner was. Amy's attraction started to shrink.

But the things Connie told her… it made no sense. So, she decided to try again.

"Uhm… nevermind. So, how did you like that documentary? I thought the insights to human consciousness were enlightening."

"Documentary?", 'Sheldon' exclaimed now. "Lady, I don't watch no documentaries. But if you want to talk about the game last night…"

"Oh, snowball!", Missy shouted and interrupted the two of them. "Amy's talking about my hamster, Georgie. Remember, Shelly built that strange machine which made snowball burst into flames. 'Not a snowball's chance in a CAT scanner'. Remember how we used to say that?"

Georgie?

"Oh yeah, right. Sheldon's been gone so long, sometimes I forget what a crazy little boy he used to be."

"So, uhm…", Amy said realization dawning on her slowly. "You are not… Sheldon? Connie's grandson?"

The old lady next to her seemed to be shaking with suppressed laughter.

"Oh, he's my grandson alright.", she said. "Just… not Sheldon."

Amy turned to the man next to her. This was so embarrassing.

"I'm so sorry.", she croaked. "I just assumed... Oh God, I better go find a hole to hide in now."

"No, Amy, don't do that.", the man said, grinning at her. "I'm the one who is sorry. I did not introduce myself properly. My name is George. George Cooper. Otherwise known as Dr. Tire."

"I's nice to meet you, George.", she said.

But then her blood ran cold. "Did you just say… Cooper?"

She did not hear the answer over the ringing in her ears.

Cooper. George Cooper. And… his brother. Sheldon Cooper. The genius.

Of course. Connie was Sheldon's maternal grandmother. How could she not have realized that. Why did she just assume his last name was Tucker as well?

Was this maybe a different Sheldon Cooper? It had to be, right?

"So…", she said, trying to sound casual. "You just said, your brother has been gone for a while. Where exactly does he live?"

"Pasadena, California.", Mary answered proudly in her son's stead. "He's a theoretical physicist at CalTech. We all miss him very much, but he has more important things to do than being here."

Amy faintly registered Georgie scoffing next to her, but her mind was working in overdrive.

How was that even possible? Such a coincidence. Here she was, having dinner with the family of the man she once desperately wanted to meet. Living with his grandmother who adored him.

Could it be? Or… her heart almost beat out of her chest.

Did they all know about her connection to Sheldon? Was this a prank? Was that why everyone was so nice to her?

It wouldn't be the first time someone would go to great lengths to humiliate her.

Were there hidden cameras somewhere? Would someone soon jump out and tell her how stupid she was for believing that someone could genuinely like her?

"Amy? Are you feeling alright? You look so pale."

Amy's gaze shifted to Connie. She was looking back at her, her eyes laced with worry.

No. Connie was not playing a prank on her. She would never do that to her. Everyone else, sure. But not Connie.

Which meant, that she was in the most bizarre situation she could have ever imagined. Like 'right out of a soap opera'-bizarre.

"Uhm… I'm alright. Thank you. Just… long day at school."

For the rest of the dinner, Amy stayed as quiet as she could, only answering direct questions. All the while, her head was spinning.

After dessert, she thanked Mary politely for dinner and as soon as she was back at Connie's house, she walked up to the wall of family pictures in the kitchen area.

For the first time, she looked at them a little more closely, and then she cursed herself, because she had not realized this before.

There he was. In various stages of his life. The same man whose picture she had seen on the dating website all these years before. The man whose work had fascinated her. The man she had seen on youtube fighting with another physicist. Dropping his pants during an award ceremony.

The man who – after a while of just considering it – had finally presented her with the last straw that led her to leave her old life behind.

Now what?

She couldn't stay here. That much was clear.

Eventually, this man would show up here. What if he remembered her? It would be so humiliating, explaining to Connie how her precious grandson, the one she kept talking up to her, had taken one look at her and decided she wasn't good enough for him.

How long would it take for Connie to agree on his assessment of her and start seeing her differently?

She needed to leave. Soon.

"Amy? What's wrong?"

Amy almost jumped. She had not noticed Connie approaching her.

"Why would anything be wrong?", Amy asked innocently and turned her head away from the pictures.

"Are you mad at me, because I did not tell you right away that you were talking to my other grandson? I am sorry. I just had to see Georgie's reaction. I did not mean to embarrass you."

Amy smiled. Connie was so nice. It was a shame that she had to leave her behind.

"You did not embarrass me, Connie. I did a great job humiliating myself. Your family must find me so weird."

"Nah, I wouldn't say that.", Connie shook her head. "Were they amused? Yes sure. But I think they found you more endearing than weird. Besides, if anyone is used to weirdness, it is this family."

Amy gave her a weak smile. She would miss this woman so much.

"Thank you, Connie. I know I don't always show it. But your friendship and guidance mean a great deal to me."

"Ah, sweetie.", Connie said softly and put an arm around her shoulder. Amy could have cried because of this act of kindness. "You mean a lot to me too. I've been feeling so much younger ever since you've moved in with me."

Amy could no longer keep the tears from welling up in her eyes.

This was it. The kind of companionship she had always yearned for. It was such a shame that it had to end.

She turned away quickly, so Connie wouldn't notice she was starting to cry.

"Well, I'm going to bed now. You should too. You look tired.", Connie said.

"I will. Good night."

As soon as Connie was gone, Amy turned back to the pictures. There were no words for the remorse she felt.

'Why couldn't you just get to know me? Your family likes me. Why not you?', she quietly asked Sheldon who was looking back at her from on of the pictures.

'Why did I even have to sign on to that stupid dating website. I should have just left California before I did that. I could just be living here in peace, not knowing who you are.'

Her phone buzzed. It was a text from an unknown number.

"Hey, Amy. I'm sorry if we made you feel uncomfortable during dinner. You seem like a nice person. I really appreciate the way you keep my meemaw company, she seems so happy lately. Do you want to go shopping with me on the weekend? I would really like to get to know you better. Missy C."

Amy exhaled shakily.

Wow.

This was the nicest text message she had ever received.

She turned her head towards the ceiling, in yet another attempt to keep the tears at bay.

It was not fair. None of it.

She looked at the picture again.

And suddenly, she felt a sense of conviction.

'No.', she thought. 'No, Sheldon. You are not going to chase me away from this place. I will keep living with your grandmother. I will befriend your sister. I will get to live this life. I deserve it. And if you show up eventually, you will have to just deal with the fact that I am here now. Maybe you will try to get to know me then. Or you can just ignore me, I don't care. But I am staying."

~ Back in the present ~

On Saturday morning, Amy had been lying in bed, thinking about the past for a while, before she checked her phone for the time.

Her body was still on Texas time, so it was no wonder she was awake before 6 am.

Sheldon was still blissfully asleep, mumbling equations and other incoherent things.

The endearing way he always talked in his sleep was one of the things she had learned about Sheldon during the past months, after they had moved in together, and it only made her love him more.

While Amy was watching Sheldon sleep, her mind wandered to the day before.

Although she had been looking forward to this weekend in Pasadena, Amy had dreaded spending her Friday all alone at the apartment while everyone else was at work.

So, it was a welcome surprise, when Bernadette had called her a few days prior.

"Hey, how about you come to my lab? We could have a nice chat, you know, biologist to biologist."

It really was very nice, spending her morning like that. Touring the lab, talking about research, first Bernadette's and then her own from before she became a High School teacher.

Amy loved every minute of it. Because, while she loved talking to Sheldon about science and no one could ever stimulate her mind as he could, this was the first time in her life, she could share her experiences with a fellow female biologist that she could actually call her friend.

But – and it was hard to admit this even to herself – she did feel a little bit jealous, seeing all of Bernadette's fancy lab equipment and hearing her talk about her current research, even if it was merely microbiology.

Over lunch with both, Penny and Bernadette, Amy had told them about her student, Maddie, as well as the mentoring program for High School students she had been working on, and the scholarship that she had been trying to organize for such a long time.

"It would just make all the difference to young girls like Maddie.", she had explained. "If she had an actual female scientist as a mentor to show her what an actual career in science could look like. To guide her through this phase of her life."

Penny had nodded in understanding.

"Don't get me wrong, I would have never tried to become a scientist, regardless of all the scholarships or programs out there.", she had stated. "But if I did, I wouldn't even have known where to start. What courses to pick, what universities to apply to or even who to ask, because I don't think our guidance counselor even really knew his way around these things and my science teacher was also our football coach, so..."

Amy had nodded vehemently.

"Yes, that's what I'm talking about. How many talented young girls like Maddie are out there, not even considering pursuing a career in science, because they are not growing up in a similar environment as I did?"

Although of course Amy had worked hard to get to where she was, she knew she had been privileged. Her parents had known exactly how to further her talent as well as her interest and combined with the fact that all the advanced classes and extracurriculars at school had been a piece of cake for her, she had found herself able to get into her dream school.

After a little bit of back and forth, Bernadette had offered to look at Amy's planned programs and talk to her bosses about it.

Amy couldn't believe her luck. If a big pharmacy company would participate in the mentoring program, maybe even help fund the scholarship, then maybe others would follow, and she would actually be able to help women get into science.

But then, the afternoon with her parents had put a damper on her good mood.

In hindsight, she should have expected it to go like this. There was a reason after all, why she had avoided visiting them all summer.

The rift between her and her parents, especially her mother, had begun to form years ago, when she had decided to leave science behind and travel the world.

How could she just throw away her future like that, her mother used to ask. All the hard work that had been put into getting her accepted at Harvard. All the years they had let her study at the East Coast, so far from home, while worrying about her well-being.

How could she just up and leave now to travel the world? Didn't she know how dangerous this was? Didn't she know how much worry she was causing her parents again, while she hopped from country to country?

The first year, she had tried to stay the devoted daughter she was. She had called her parents frequently to let them know where she was and what was going on in her life. She had sent them souvenirs and visited them every few months for at least a week.

But every time she did, her mother's badgering had made her visits almost insufferable.

"Why do you keep doing this, Amy? Is it just because you got mugged that one time? Don't you think you should talk to a therapist instead of running away? It's time to come home and settle down. Go back to your job. I'm sure if you let me help, we will find you a nice husband in no time."

Amy knew, her mother loved her and just wanted her to be happy. But she could not do what was expected of her. Not anymore.

She needed to be free. Live her life on her own terms. She tried to explain it to her mother, but it was pointless.

And so, her visits became less frequent.

She still sent them postcards from various places around the world. She still visited them for the holidays and sometimes she called her father who was much more understanding about her wishes.

But then, on one of her visits, her mother had blown up at her. Accused her of living a life that went against everything she had been taught and of bringing shame over herself and their family.

Why could she not just go back to her job? Did she never want to get married? And, worst of all, would she never provide her parents with the grandbabies they were so eagerly waiting for?

This was during the time when Amy was already feeling frustrated about everything. About not being able to make friends or finding happiness anywhere.

And with everything boiling up inside her, she had finally snapped and told her mother, if she was feeling that ashamed of her only daughter, then maybe she should just not come visit anymore at all.

Her mother had stubbornly agreed, probably hoping that – as usual – Amy would come around, apologize and find a compromise that would please everyone.

And maybe she would have. Because just a few weeks later, she was driving through Texas, thinking of flying back home and returning to her old life, because her travels did not make her happy anyway.

She was starting to think that her mother was right. And she was feeling guilty for what she had said during their fight. In her mind, she was already apologizing to her mother, asking to stay in her old room for a while and even agreeing to let her create a profile on a dating website again.

But then, she passed through Medford. Met Connie and the Coopers.

The rest was history.

During the past three years, Amy had often thought about calling her parents and making amends. But she had been afraid of telling them about her new surrogate family.

And so, more and more time had passed. Her parents still thought she was travelling the world, and apart from calling her father on the high holidays, she had pushed any thought of them to the back of her mind.

Deep inside she had often felt bad about the situation.

Especially after Sheldon had proposed to her.

She really, really wanted to have her parents there for the wedding. She wanted her Daddy to walk her down the aisle. And she wanted a father-daughter dance. And yes, even if things between her and her mother had not always been easy, she wanted her there too.

So, one time during the summer, without telling Sheldon about it, she had called her father. Not just to wish him a merry Christmas or a happy easter. But to chat. He had cried tears of joy over the phone and begged her to come visit them soon. He had promised her, there would be no more badgering. He would handle her mother.

She had promised in return to think about it, and that was why, the day before, she had finally made her way to her parents' house for the first time in years.

In her head she had prepared everything she had wanted to tell them.

First, she wanted to tell them about spending the last three years in Medford. About how she had become a science teacher, although she was dreading her mother's reaction to that.

About Connie and Mary and Missy. And about the choir. Although she knew, her mother would hate that even more. Her being part of a family somewhere else.

And at last, she wanted to tell them about Sheldon.

She had hoped, learning that she was getting married to a brilliant man, coming from what her mother would consider a 'good family' would smooth things over.

But she had never even come that far.

First, because her mother had spent a lot of time talking about everything that had happened in the extended family over the past few years.

And after that – well – because she was a coward and chickened out of telling them anything.

"So, Amy, where do you currently live?", her father had asked her at some point. "What country will you be travelling next."

"I… uhm…", she had stuttered. "I'm staying with friends, and tomorrow evening I'll be travelling to Texas."

It was the truth. Well, at least part of the truth.

"Texas. Nice.", her father had nodded.

Her mother hadn't said anything. Apparently, her staying away for a few years had finally stopped her mother's habit of wanting to control everything about her life.

Although, right that moment, Amy would have been grateful for it. Because maybe, if her mother would have asked one of her much too personal questions, she would have found the courage to confess about this new life she had been living.

Instead, she got up after only two hours and promised her parents to visit more often from now on, before she left.

Her feet had carried her to the university then, where, unbeknownst to him, she had watched Sheldon work on his equations for fifteen minutes.

She had admired the way he was scribbling down equation after equation. Things that only a small handful of people in the world could understand.

She envied him. Not for his mind, because her own was pretty amazing as well. But for his relentless pursuit of his career. For knowing exactly where he wanted to be and what he wanted to do.

She used to know too. Years ago. But now, she felt herself being pulled into several directions, not really knowing which of the paths in front of her was the one that would lead her to the right place. Or even how that 'right place' was supposed to look like.

Someone had once told her to always just worry about taking the next step. And that someday it would all make sense.

It had worked for her. For a while. But now, a few months before her fortieth birthday, she was beginning to feel exhausted.

She had pondered all of this, while sitting in the cafeteria, drinking tea.

That's when Dr. Gunderson had found her. The hours she got to spend with him and his colleagues, had been the highlight of her day.

She had spent time at the lab. And when she had heard of this fascinating study, it was as if every cell of her body had been whispering to her.

'This is it, Amy. Neurobiology. Analyzing chemicals. Cutting through brains. Measuring brain waves. Conducting studies. You love it. You miss it. You are good at it. Come back.'

Sheldon could not fool her either.

Yes, of course, she knew he loved her. Always. No matter what she would choose to do with her life.

But the way he had looked at her when he had found her at the cafeteria… Even though he did not say anything – which she was grateful for – it was clear, which path he would identify as the right one.

He was probably right too.

It could all be so easy. Taking the job at CalTech – a job she knew she would enjoy immensely. Moving into the apartment at Los Robles. Surely Rajesh would understand that he had to move out in that scenario.

She would still have Missy and Mary and even Georgie in her life, since they were Sheldon's family. She would still see the people from the choir from time to time.

She could meet Bernadette and Penny more often. Maybe even make more friends at the university, now that she seemed to finally have learned how to do that.

It was a life she could see herself be happy with.

But the more she thought about it, something just felt wrong. Because yes, a part of her wanted this. But another part of her wanted something entirely different and Amy had no idea how to navigate the conflicting desires inside her.

Suddenly, the man next to her turned to her and snaked his arms around her waist, finally chasing away the mess in her brain.

"Dear Lord… I don't think I can move.", he grumbled into her neck before he rested his face on her chest.

She patted his shoulder softly and grinned widely. She knew exactly why he felt this way.

"I feel the same way.", she admitted.

"I did not hurt you last night though, did I?", he asked her, and she could hear the concern in his voice.

That was the Sheldon she loved. Relentless in all his endeavors but still always worried for her well-being.

And well, her whole body was aching. But in a really good way. She couldn't recall ever feeling this satisfied.

She shifted a little, so she could kiss his cheek.

"Last night was incredible, Sheldon.", she told him, and she could see a well-deserved smug grin spread on his face. "I have no idea where you learned these moves."

"Hmmm.", he hummed and brushed his lips against her forehead. "I cannot take all the credit. You were pretty creative yourself. Guess that's what happens when two geniuses collide."

She giggled.

Yes, he was right.

Something had come over both of them the night before.

She did not know why. Was it still the fact that they had been apart a few days? Or was it coming back home to him after this extremely eventful day? Or maybe was it, because she felt so relieved for Sheldon being so different now to how he had been during the summer?

Either way, there had been a playfulness between them last night. A lightness, that led them to experiment with their lovemaking.

From the beginning, being with Sheldon that way had been extremely wonderful and satisfying. But last night was… something entirely different.

All her life, she had kept this side of herself suppressed. Hidden inside herself. It was so freeing, finally letting it all out and giving in to her desires. Seeing them reciprocated. Oh, it was magical.

"I just hope, Raj wore his earphones.", she said. It only occurred to her now. The night before, she had almost forgotten about having a roommate at all.

"I'm sure he did.", Sheldon nodded. "But I will put something into the roommate agreement, just in case."

Well, it wasn't ideal. Not even close to it. But it would have to do. For now.

She sighed contently and snuggled into Sheldon's arms, happy at the prospect of spending the whole day with him.

Sheldon let his hand roam over her side, and she shivered. If only they could stay in bed just a little bit longer.

"We should get up.", she whispered regretfully. "Becky's party is starting in a few hours, and we still have to get her a present.

"You're right.", Sheldon agreed. "And one for Lucas too, considering the godparents ceremony later in the afternoon."

Amy smiled softly. It was so nice of Penny and Leonard to ask her along with Sheldon. Although…

"Sheldon, don't you think it is a little strange, they are making me the kids' godmother? They've only known me for a few months."

He seemed to ponder it for a few seconds.

"No, I do not find it strange.", he finally said. "After this summer, you're just as much a part of the group as I am. Besides, you are great with Lucas and Becky. Remember, Penny couldn't get over how you got them to eat their broccoli by calling them miniature trees. Genius."

She smirked. She couldn't believe herself that this had worked. But she would keep it in mind for the time when she would have a child of her own.

"Be that as it may… wouldn't it have made more sense for them to ask Bernadette? Penny and her have been friends for such a long time. And she lives so much closer."

For a moment, Amy thought Sheldon was making a weird face, but it diminished quickly.

"Maybe they thought it would be fitting to make us godparents since we are getting married. Besides, Bernadette has two kids herself that keep her busy next to her full-time job. Maybe they wanted someone childless who can focus their attention on their kids."

Amy's heart sank.

'Childless'. Was Sheldon implying that they would not have kids after all?

There was no time to discuss this right now, but she made a mental note to bring up that topic soon. She needed to know if she and Sheldon were on the same page with this.

A few hours and a long shopping trip later Sheldon and Amy finally arrived at the backyard of Leonard and Penny's house.

As soon as they were there, they were greeted enthusiastically by their friends.

The place looked so nice, decorated with balloons and banners. Lots of toys and games for all the children that were there.

Amy looked at them as they all ran around in the yard and had fun.

And then she looked at Sheldon, wondering if he too was thinking how nice it would be, if in a few years, there would be children of their own joining in the fun.

She sighed deeply.

Never had her biological clock ticked this loudly.

"Hey, Amy!"

Bernadette smiled brightly at her and pulled her out of her thoughts.

"Bernie!", she exclaimed and returned the short woman's hug.

Sheldon seemed to take this as his cue to leave the girls to themselves and went to talk to Leonard and Howard.

"Sorry about girl's night.", Bernie said as she pulled back from Amy again. "That would have been so much more fun than our meeting yesterday."

"It's alright. We can have girl's night next time."

"Definitely.", Bernadette agreed. "I just hope you weren't too bored next to the guys and their video games."

"No, actually, I went to the planetarium with Raj. His show is amazing."

"Oh, yeah.", Bernadette nodded absentmindedly. "Howard and I keep saying we need to go to the planetarium again soon. We haven't seen one of Raj's shows in over a year."

Amy couldn't help but feel sorry for Raj. This was what he had been talking about the other night. His friends went on with their lives without him and hardly ever thought of him.

But just as she was about to bring it up, Bernadette continued.

"So, listen, about the scholarship…" She stopped.

"Yeah?", Amy asked hopefully.

"I talked it over with my bosses last night. They said it's a nice idea, but they are against contributing in any way."

"Oh."

Amy's face fell. She had really wanted to hear good news on that front.

"It's just…", Bernadette sighed. "You are a High School teacher, Amy. At one High School. It's great you want to further the girls at your school, but how many kids would even be eligible to compete for it? One or two per school year?"

"It's not just our High School.", Amy protested. "I've been talking to other teachers at other schools too. This is about furthering young girls with a talent for science everywhere. Especially the ones like Maddie who come from a background where that talent and interest is falling on deaf ears."

"I get that.", Bernadette assured her. "And I think it's great. I remember how hard it was for me. My parents helped as much as they could, but they were never rich, and I spent a lot of my time waitressing when I should have been studying. It would have been so much easier with a scholarship like the one you are envisioning, but…"

Amy winced. She had heard that same sentence from many other companies and universities, who she had contacted for this cause.

"But since the idea is coming from a High School teacher from a small town in East Texas, your bosses think it is not a wise business decision to contribute."

"Especially because you don't really have any big names involved to show off", Bernadette added.

"Yeah, and if everyone will keep saying no, I will never have anything to show off.", Amy said sadly.

"Hey.", Bernadette said and nudged her gently. "If you want, I can still mentor Maddie once she starts college."

"That's sweet of you, Bernie.", Amy sighed. "But for that to happen, she has to apply to a college in the first place. And then get financial aid for her education, since her parents probably won't be willing to help. Right now, I don't have much hope, and the clock is ticking."

"I'm sorry, Amy. I can see how important this is to you."

Amy smiled weakly. She had hoped, Maddie's parents would be more inclined to let Maddie study science, if there was a possibility for a scholarship. And now she had to find a new strategy.

"Thank you, Bernadette. I know you tried your best. I just need to figure out the next steps now."

"Hey, have you thought of…", Bernadette started but bit her lips and did not continue her sentence.

"What?", Amy asked, desperate to hear anything that could give her hope.

"Well…", Bernadette sighed. "I don't want to overstep, and I think Sheldon would be mad if I asked you this directly. But have you ever considered, not starting this big project as a science teacher?"

Amy furrowed her eyebrows. Why would Sheldon be mad about anything Bernadette would tell her?

"What are you saying, Bernadette?"

"Look.", Bernadette said and looked around, probably to make sure Sheldon wasn't close by. "You are a big name. Dr. Amy Farrah Fowler. And even if you haven't been active in a while, you are well known in the scientific community. Your papers have been published and people respect you. Why not finally go back into science? Your idea of this scholarship would get much more attention if it came from an accomplished female scientist from CalTech and not from a science teacher from Medford High."

Amy gulped. It wasn't as if she had never thought of that before.

Bernadette was right of course. But on the other hand, if she weren't at Medford High, then who would even encourage a girl like Maddie?

"I just think, you could do more from a place like CalTech.", Bernadette continued. "They always do projects to get girls into science. Leonard, Howard and Sheldon once participated and it was a fiasco, but maybe you could bring your idea for this mentoring system and scholarship into it."

They were interrupted by Raj bringing out the Birthday cake for Becky. It looked delicious and Amy found it touching that he would go to such lengths to help his friends who would probably never return the favor.

Sheldon came back over to her and handed her a glass of champagne. His own glass seemed to be filled with apple juice, which for some reason, Amy found endearing.

She waved at Raj and smiled friendly, but then she saw his eyes widen, and he looked away from her quickly.

Amy frowned.

They had bonded last night, had they not? They were friends now.

Or had she misinterpreted everything?

Had he only been nice to her as a favor to Sheldon, so he could have his game night in peace?

Or worse… had he heard them last night and was uncomfortable now?

Amy sighed.

It was a good thing she and Sheldon would be flying back to Texas the next day.

Missy's POV

"Alright. Thank you for finding out."

Missy hung up the phone and sat down on the couch, a wave of relief flooding through her.

For days, she had felt scared and anxious. Paranoid, really.

Just like months before, after Sheldon had been attacked.

The word "WHORE" kept appearing in her dreams. And the man who used to call her exactly that.

Robbie's face was everywhere. Behind every tree, around every corner… it was madness.

Even after Georgie had shown her how to look up prison inmates online, she had still been unsure, if the information she found was correct.

Finally, she had dared to call the local police station for information about Robbie's whereabouts.

After being redirected a few times, it had finally been confirmed, that Robbie was still held at the maximum-security prison in Beaumont with no chance to ever get out.

Whoever had vandalized her car, it was not him. It had probably just been a stupid prank.

Finally, she would be able to sleep soundly again.

And she would be able to refocus her attention on her son.

Her son who was lying in bed after she had to pick him up from school with a stomachache.

Again.

"Hey, Joshi…", she said as she opened the door to her son's room.

She had to blink twice. It felt like being thrown back in time a few decades.

Joshua was lying on his bed, a superman comic book in his hands.

Next to the bed, there was the model trainset Sheldon had gotten him for his sixth birthday.

For a moment, she asked herself if this was what her mother used to feel like, every time she had to talk to Sheldon about his issues.

Although, of course, Sheldon had only very rarely wanted to stay home from school.

"Joshua…", she tried again after being ignored the first time and sat down on the bed before she snatched the comic book away from her son.

"Hey.", the boy protested. "I was reading this."

"And you can resume reading it, as soon as we are done with that conversation.", she said in a voice she hoped would sound strict.

"I am done with this conversation. Does that count?", her son said, pouting.

Missy drew in a sharp breath.

Since when did her Joshua have such an attitude?

"You don't even know what I want to talk to you about.", she argued.

"You want to know if I am really sick.", he mumbled.

"Well, aren't you a smarty pants.", she said, smiling slightly.

He just stared at her blankly and Missy could feel her own stomach being tied into knots now.

"Joshua, what's going on?", she all but whispered. "You were looking forward to your new school so much. You told everyone what a big boy you are."

Joshua huffed.

"Maybe I don't want to go to school. It's boring. And Miss Miller is stupid."

"It is not respectful to talk about your class teacher like that.", Missy scolded her son. "Even if you find school boring, you have to go."

She paused and looked at her boy. What was going on? What was she missing?

"Joshua, are the other kids mean to you? Are they making fun of you?", she finally decided to ask.

It was not too far-fetched. He was so much like his Uncle. Sheldon had always gotten in trouble with the other kids.

Joshua just looked at her for a few moments without answering, and Missy almost thought she had solved this puzzle, when finally, Joshua continued talking.

"They are just stupid.", he scoffed. "I don't care about them. They only say stupid things."

Missy's heart broke a little.

"What do they say to you?"

Joshua took a deep breath.

"It does not matter.", he whispered. "Like I said, they are just stupid."

"Joshi…", Missy said and scooted closer to her son. "You know, if other children bother you, you can always ask an adult for help. I can come talk to your teacher."

"No!", Joshua exclaimed. "I never want you to come to my school to talk to anyone."

Missy felt taken aback by the intensity of Joshua's voice.

But maybe he was right. Telling on the other kids really could make this situation worse.

She wished Amy was here. She would know exactly what to do.

Joshua took his comic book back and held it in front of himself to read, but Missy could see, there were tears gathering in his eyes.

"I'm so sorry.", she whispered. "I just wish I could help you."

"It's okay, mom.", he said, still not looking up. "You can leave now. I will stay in school tomorrow. I promise."

Missy knew she was being dismissed.

Defeated, she went back to the living room, wondering if her life would ever get any easier.