Chapter 61: One Mind
"Do I really have to wear this?" Falco complained.
"Yes. You do," Katt answered brusquely. She scrutinised her appearance in the mirror. "This is a special occasion, so you are going to dress appropriately for it."
Falco frowned at the three-piece suit cladding his torso. There were way too many layers; the vest chafed; and he couldn't get the damned tie done right. Still too short at the front. His growl rumbled. "It's not like Fox will be able to see us. Why the hell is he going to care?"
As he undid the knot for another attempt, Katt walked up and took the tie's ends from him. She began weaving them. "Because it's your best friend's wedding, and you are a good, supportive friend."
Falco rolled his eyes. "It's not a wedding. They already have the same surname. The only thing that Fox is doing is letting Krystal move into his head. And frankly, I don't get how he thinks that's a good ide-UGH!"
Katt tightened the tie sharply, cutting Falco off midsentence. He clawed at the fabric for a split second before Katt loosened it. "It is a wedding by Cerinian standards. But even if it weren't, we're putting in all this effort for Vixy's sake. Her only child is getting married, and you are not ruining this for her by turning up in slacks and a t-shirt."
"Okay. Okay." Falco rubbed at his throat. "But the second the ceremony's over, I'm taking the suit off."
Katt cracked a smirk. "Right that second? I mean, the others might be shocked, but I wouldn't mind seeing you strip in front of everyone."
"Hardy-har-har."
"I'll tell you what. If you keep those clothes on for another hour after the ceremony, I'll let you take mine off later."
Katt's eyes gleamed in a sinful way. Falco's darted to the passionate red dress that hung to her ankles and hugged her waist. Its bold contrast made the exposed fur of her grey bust stand out. Falco felt his pants tighten. He swallowed heavily.
"I'll be good."
"That's what I like to hear," Katt purred.
Waiting for Katt to finish her makeup, Falco sat quietly on the bed. Thanks to her, his mind began to wander, daydreaming about all the things they might later do upon that very mattress… Great! Now he hated being in the blasted tux even more! He didn't dare try to rid himself of it though.
Time on the clock ticked away. With barely 15 minutes to spare, Katt stepped away from the mirror at long last. She looked like a supermodel. Though perhaps that was because of the dress and Falco's stoked sense of lust. Not to imply that he didn't think she looked hot any other time. No – beautiful! She always looked beautiful, no matter what she wore. Though the dress did make her look a little extra sexy right now…
God, he was glad he wasn't the one dating a telepath.
"Ready to go?" Katt chirped.
He resisted a burning urge to sigh in relief. "Let's."
Slipping her arm around his, Katt led Falco out from their room and through the Great Fox's halls. Her excitement became apparent in her quicker pace, nearly dragging Falco to the bridge. The whole crew was present, as well as a few close friends – including Bill, Miyu, and Fay – who travelled all the way to Cerinia's orbit to support Fox's big day. Slippy even invited Amanda along as his plus-one. Everyone was dressed in their best attire, which would have left Falco the odd one out had Katt let him have his way earlier. She was still the wiser of them.
He found Vixy easily in the crowd. She was the one perched in front of the projector, seated upon the first row of makeshift pews made from camping chairs. Her gaze never left it despite all the conversation around her. Peppy sat next to her, holding Vixy's hand. Falco followed Katt to join them in the empty seats to their right. Only then did Vixy turn her head and smile.
"You both look nice," she said.
"You don't look bad yourself," Katt replied, eyeing Vixy's pristine, sky-blue gown. "Skipped the makeup?"
Vixy chuckled. "I'm not brave enough to wear any today. I know I'm going to cry throughout the whole thing. I won't be able to help it."
"It's one of those times when it's okay to cry," Peppy smiled. "Don't feel as though you have to hold back on our accounts."
Mirroring his expression, Vixy raised a hand to wipe away the tears that did form then. Something between a short laugh and a sob wracked her chest. "I'd give anything to be there in person though."
"We'll celebrate harder to make up for it then," Katt offered.
Vixy's smile warmed. "Yes," she said softly.
As much as Falco wanted to say something more to comfort her, nothing worthwhile sprung to mind. Instead, he placed one hand behind her shoulder, patting gently. Vixy seemed to appreciate the gesture enough. Together, they all turned to face the projector, waiting for the big moment to arrive.
Falco kind of wished he was down there too.
One… Two… Three… Four…
A stroke of a brush coincided with each count. Its teeth raked through Fox's cleanly washed fur, coaxing his drying hairs into order. When he counted to 10, Fox moved the brush to the next section and began again. He worked slowly, meticulously. He wouldn't let a single hair sit out of place.
If only he could reach behind his back.
"Need help there?"
Fox stopped his attempt to twist his arm out of its socket. He turned as Thalse approached from the far end of the room. The man smiled and offered his hand. With a sigh, Fox handed the brush over. Thalse knelt behind him. Gently, he began straightening Fox's coat. Fox sat perfectly still, allowing his thoughts to wander. They only went in one direction now that he wasn't actively keeping himself busy. His heart started to pound a little faster.
"Feeling nervous?" Thalse smirked.
Fox chuckled lightly. "Should I not be?"
"I'm hardly surprised," Thalse laughed. "I still remember my own time. I couldn't sit still for even a minute before the ceremony."
Fox's muscles were practically crawling inside his skin. "I thought I got it out of my system when Krystal and I swapped crests. But now…"
"This feels like a lot more than just joining clans."
"It does," Fox conceded. "I've told Krystal this; but getting married on Cerinia has way more steps than where I'm from."
Thalse made an unremarkable noise. "I suppose it would seem that way to you." He finally removed the brush. "There we go. Do you want me to do the tail as well?"
"Nah. I've got it. Thanks though."
Fox appreciated Thalse's aid in this, as well as his company. Under Cerinian traditions, his father would ordinarily help him prepare before the binding ceremony. Alas, that wasn't possible. So instead, Thalse sacrificed his time with Krystal to fill James's role. Fox accepted his offer graciously. He would still have given almost anything to have both his parents with him today.
Fully groomed, Fox pulled the rich green toga around his waist over his right shoulder. He then walked in front of a mirror and picked up the medallion he had set in front of it before bathing. A disc the size of his palm hung from the beaded string. Arches of gold and silver ran along two thirds of the circumference. A wedge of amethyst as deep purple as Cerinia's oceans completed the base. Above that, the medallion's core consisted of three horizontal sections of jade, garnet, and topaz.
Fox marvelled the mosaic with a soft smile. It reminded him of their pilgrimage. The journey after leaving Galthumarata proved more arduous than any of them had anticipated. Sandstorms battered their caravan through the desert. In the colder north, Fox regretted leaving his heating pendant at home, assuming that the nights wouldn't be so bitter in mid-spring. Then on their way down the coast, Thalse and Nomar's ehn hexed them both with horrid seasickness throughout the choppy voyage.
The rest of their journey went more smoothly after reaching port, though Fox preferred not to remember his reception at the Temple of Ilis. A gabby traveller from Kezamat must have told the priests that he came from space before Fox even set foot inside the city. A shiver ran down his spine thinking about the crowds that stalked him throughout their stay. Another day longer, and they might have erected effigies in his honour. That or something else just as excessive.
Fox looped the medallion around his neck. It felt appropriate for the ceremony. Krystal would no doubt be wearing hers. Both pieces added weight to the ehn they would soon forge together, for their union would withstand even death and reunite them in the gods' divine gardens. At least, that was what the Cerinians believed. Fox wasn't in a hurry to confirm it with his own eyes.
"You look dashing," Thalse commented. His reflection stood behind Fox's in the mirror. "Krystal will be pleased."
Fox smiled. "Thank you. How does she look?"
"She's beautiful," Thalse said confidence and a tear swimming in his eye.
'She always is,' Fox thought. "May I see her?"
"Of course. But not until the ceremony." Thalse smirked. Fox rolled his eyes and decided to let the matter slide.
Thalse then revealed something hidden behind his back. A thin, golden circlet glistened in his hands. "My father gave me this when I bonded with Nomar. It was passed down from his own father before him. Today, Krystal will become the third in our line to merge minds with someone. I'd like for this to be yours now."
Fox gaped at the headpiece. "Thalse… I couldn't. If I take it with me, it…"
"It can be passed down to your own son when the time comes," Thalse interjected. His tone remained calm. "That way, a small piece of our culture can live on outside our world. I realise that I am not your father, Fox. But, lacking any sons myself, I'd be honoured to pass this circlet on to you instead."
Tears warmed Fox's eyes. It hardly seemed fair. "I'd be honoured to accept it," he responded in soft, shaken words. "Thank you, Thalse."
Thalse smiled. He then gestured for Fox face the mirror. Thalse moved behind Fox and raised the circlet over his ears. It sat lightly. Its weight felt almost imperceptible. At the front, a single triangular emerald gleamed a similar shade to Fox's eyes.
"It suits you," Thalse remarked.
"You think so?" Fox raised his fingers to the smooth metal. He didn't usually wear headpieces like this, yet it did seem to pair well with everything else in his reflection. Combining it with his garb and tribal tattoos, he looked Cerinian in everything but blood.
"Is all well?" Thalse then asked. His voice carried a twinge of concern.
Fox snapped out from his thoughts. "Yes. It's fine." He turned his gaze back to the mirror. "I just couldn't recognise myself for a minute."
Thalse smirked. "That usually doesn't happen until after you're married." His expression sobered. "Are you alright?"
Fox stared off for a moment longer, wondering where the old Fox McCloud, garbed in his proud Cornerian flight suit, had vanished. Perhaps they'd meet again someday. "I will be. It's nothing to worry about." Thalse seemed to accept that with a solemn nod.
There was nothing else left for Fox to do. Nerves began to flare as he and Thalse waited. Every few seconds, Fox would check over the mirror, worrying and imagining stray hairs that he couldn't see. Thalse urged him to relax more than once. Alas, Fox felt every muscle itching beneath his skin until a knock finally sounded at their door.
A young tod in temple robes poked his head in. "Beg your pardon, sirs. We can begin with the ceremony when you're ready."
Fox thanked him and glanced over to Thalse. The man stood without prompting. No better time than the present. They followed the acolyte through the temple's upper hall to a small, open courtyard. There, the Temple of Cerinia held its private services away from the public areas.
The space was surrounded with garden beds. An alter stood towards the rear with golden curtains draped around green cushions. Fox found the High Priest waiting, along with several of his clergy stationed throughout the yard. As promised, High Priestess Ovia of Galthumarata attended as well. She waved from the sidelines when Fox met her gaze. Her young son, Fox, appeared more interested in the flowers than anything else going on around him.
Fox swept his eye across the yard for the one thing he couldn't go without today. He spotted the tell-tale cord snaking its way from the antenna mounted upon the balcony. Its other end fed to the radio placed beside the altar. Fox knelt before it, checking that everything was still connected properly. He sent a call out. It only took a few moments to hear Slippy's voice crackle.
"Hey, Fox. Is that you?"
"Sure is, Slip," Fox grinned. "How are things on your end?"
"Everyone's getting into their seats now. Ready whenever you are."
"Great. Still waiting on the bride to show up, so hang tight." Fox then licked his lips. "Is Mom there?"
A brief noise came from the Great Fox's end. "I am, sweetheart," Vixy spoke. "Oh, Fox. I'm so proud of you."
Fox's smile grew warm. His eyes watered. "Thanks, Mom." A sigh broke from his chest. "I wish Dad was still with us."
"I'm sure he'd be just as proud too," Vixy sighed. "It's too bad we can't see you from much better than a bird's-eye view. I wish I could see what you look like right now."
"Do you remember that movie, The Planet of Gold, and the way the native men were dressed in it? I kind of look like that." Fox then proceeded to describe the scene around him, offering enough details for everyone onboard to imagine it themselves.
Eventually, Thalse's hand on his shoulder caught Fox's attention. "Krystal's on her way. Better get into position."
Fox nodded. He turned to one of the acolytes and gestured for him to take his place. It had taken months, but Fox and Slippy worked together to develop a Cerinian-language program for the Great Fox's interpreter system. It would allow the radio to translate most, if not all, of the ceremony for everyone onboard. The acolyte would commentate on everything that wasn't spoken, so that nobody missed a detail. It was just a shame that they couldn't have also set up a video camera to record the whole thing. Would have been too much to deal with though, Fox reflected.
A pair of priests began strumming mandolins as Fox took his place at the end of a long, patterned carpet trailing across the courtyard. He tried to control his quickening breath. His heart hammered inside his chest. Closing his eyes, Fox became aware of the sound of footfalls coming from the hallway behind him. He gave in and looked past his shoulder.
His soul left his body at the sight of her. Thalse had told the truth of it. Krystal looked stunning. Garbed in a flowing, emerald dress that hung from her left shoulder, she walked slowly with her hand clasped within Nomar's. The pilgrim's pendant jostled upon Krystal's bosom with every step. The tiara around her ears gleamed as she entered the daylight. Krystal soon stopped just beside Fox. The brightest smile pulled her lips as she turned to him.
"You look like an angel," Fox said without thinking.
Krystal blushed. She appraised him back. "And you look very handsome." Fox fought to keep his tail still in front of everyone. He caught a glimpse at Thalse and Nomar. Neither had a dry eye between their broad smiles.
"Mother and Father," the High Priest began to speak. "Creator and the End. Inseparable and eternal. Please witness these two souls before us on this fated day. Come forth, my children, and cast aside all boundaries behind you."
Krystal's fingers coiled between Fox's. Squeezing gently, Fox crossed the carpet in twain with her. He spotted the acolyte whispering to the radio and nodded approvingly. He then turned his attention to the High Priest before stopping at the altar. Fox and Krystal lowered themselves onto a seat each. The smoke of incense floated around their noses.
The High Priest sat as well. "From birth, you have each walked with your souls independent. From here today, you will walk not as two but one. Will you each commit to shedding your selves henceforth and embrace unity beyond your flesh and bones forevermore?"
If he was seeking to worsen Fox's nerves, he was going the right way about it. Yet Fox held fast onto Krystal's hand and answered a fraction of a second after her. "I will."
The High Priest nodded. His knobby hands lifted a small, decorated pot. Carefully, he filled two cups placed before the pair. A fragrant steam wafted from the indigo liquid. Fox and Krystal each brought one cup to their lips. The tea would help soothe their bodies and relax their minds, making the binding process easier later. As they drank, the High Priest read passages from the holy tome at rest in his lap. Fox felt Krystal's tail overlap his own. His eyelids became heavy, and his pulse slowed. Her thoughts brushed against his fringe, and Fox sought to reach for them. Perhaps they could forge their ehn here and now, without all the bells and whistles.
Alas, it was not yet time. As soon as their cups were drained, Fox extended his left arm against Krystal's right. The High Priest sang a prayer as he wove a light, silver chain from their elbows to a cuff that he fastened around both their wrists. While this happened, another pair of priests draped a large, golden cloth over Fox and Krystal's shoulders, clasping it in front of them both.
"Now rise, my children," the High Priest instructed. "You may now return to your den. May the gods bless your union and join you without seam or fray."
Fox bowed in time with Krystal. "We thank you, Your Grace," they said as scripted. They then straightened and turned to face the way they had entered. Fox chose to follow Krystal's lead, lest they bump and stumble over each other, which would not have made the best start to their marriage. They matched their paces and joined Thalse and Nomar, who received them with a crushing yet tender embrace.
"We're so proud of you both," Nomar wept.
Krystal leaned into her. "Thank you, Mama."
"How are you feeling so far?" Thalse asked Fox.
Fox looked inside for a moment. "Still kind of anxious… But I'm excited as well." Thalse nodded, pleased with his response. Fox then glanced guiltily towards the radio. He wanted to spend a few minutes talking with his mother and everyone aboard the Great Fox. Unfortunately, customs dictated for him and Krystal to return home. They needed to forge their ehn while the tea's herbs were still in their systems.
Thalse seemed to read his wishes. "Don't worry about the radio. We'll bring everything over when we come to check on you both tomorrow. There'll be plenty of time to celebrate afterwards."
Fox nodded. "Thank you." He turned his head to Krystal. "Shall we go?"
He felt the warmth of her smile. "Let's."
It was awkward walking while chained together with Krystal. Her stride was longer, whilst his was quicker in his current state. Krystal linked their minds to coordinate them better. A taste of what was to come, Fox supposed. He became glad to know that he wasn't the only one feeling jitters strike him at the eleventh hour. Krystal was practically trembling out of their bindings. The smile never left her lips though.
The temple priests escorted them home. Passers-by stopped and stared where their groups crossed paths. Some folks cheered for them, burning Fox and Krystal's ears with joyful blushes. He pressed closer to her, and she against him. Their tails brushed the back of their cloak, barely contained within it
When they reached home, the priests released their wrists and removed their cape. Then with brief felicitations, they left the newlyweds to their privacy. Fox rolled his arm and rubbed where the chains had pinched. Meanwhile, Krystal came up behind him and wrapped her arms around his waist, nestling into his back.
"How do you feel?" he asked.
She sighed. "I never thought a ceremony as short as that could take it out of me."
Fox snickered. "That's weddings for you. They take more time to set up than to actually run." He turned within her grasp, pulling Krystal into his arms. "I love you, Krystal."
"I love you too, Fox," she smiled. "I'm glad that we're doing this."
"That's right…" he realised. Anxiety crept in again. "We still have to do… that…"
Krystal looked up worriedly. "Are you sure you're ready for this?"
Fox threw steel into his gaze. "I'm not backing out now. I'm with you all the way." Krystal accepted his answer with a solemn nod. Fox glanced around the room. "So… Should we do this right now… or…?"
Krystal sighed. It sounded like the world sat upon her shoulders. "Yes… We should."
Taking his hand gently, she led Fox upstairs to their bedroom. The space was already set up with more burners containing the same incense from the temple. Fox lit those on one side of the room and joined Krystal near the bed. He stared into her eyes. Some fear shimmered within them, yet there was love and desire that overtook it. Fox kissed her twice. Once sweetly. The second time deep and passionately. They released their breaths together, resting their foreheads against the other's. Fox focused on this moment for as long as he could.
"So…" he finally said. "How should we do this?"
"Lie down," Krystal told him. Fox obeyed, spreading himself across the bedroll onto his back. Krystal laid over him. She pulled the blankets over them both, making sure that they were comfortable. "Since you can't reach into my mind, I'm going to have to pull you into it. Bear with me while I figure things out."
Fox stroked her cheek. "I believe in you." Krystal smiled. "And… before anything else… I just want you to know. I'll always love you. No matter what. If this doesn't work… it doesn't mean anything. My brain might just not be good enough to make an ehn with. It won't be anyone's fault. So, don't blame yourself if something goes wrong."
A tear broke free down Krystal's face. He wiped it away. "It will work," she told him. "I want it to. We just need to believe."
Fox nodded. "I'll do whatever I can to help."
She smiled then kissed him. Krystal lowered herself onto Fox's chest and laid her head beside his. "Could you please do one thing for me?"
"What's that?"
Krystal swallowed. "Hold me. And don't let go."
His arms wrapped around her waist like iron. His heart hammered inside his chest. Close as they were, Krystal's felt faster. She took several steadying breaths. She shook like a leaf.
Fox kissed beneath her ear. "I'm ready when you are."
"Okay…" Krystal tensed all over. "I'm going in."
He felt her mind slip into his. Her consciousness spread through his thoughts and nestled inside. Krystal and Fox took deep breaths together. Intimate as it was, this was only their regular bond. There was still so much more left to go. But it made a good enough base camp, in a manner of speaking. They had something to fall back to if climbing the mountain got too hard. Krystal liked Fox's analogy.
"I'm going to go deeper now," she warned. "Just relax."
He thought he was prepared. Yet in the following moments, Fox's thoughts died away as Krystal's touch penetrated past his boundaries. His body seized, and his eyes rolled back inside his head. All the while, Krystal wormed her way through to the back of his skull, seeping into parts of Fox's mind that he never even knew he had before.
Worry flashed from Krystal. "Are you alright? Give me a sign."
"Blurg-heg-hurr…"
Alarm struck through Krystal into Fox's heart. She pulled out quickly to base camp. "Fox! Please tell me you're okay!"
His thoughts pieced themselves back together. Fox groaned. "That was different…"
Krystal bit her lip. "Maybe we should stop."
"No…" Fox slurred. "No. I'm okay. I'm okay." Yet Krystal clearly wasn't convinced. "I've just got to get used to it. That's all."
He looked up into her troubled eyes. "I can keep going," he assured her.
Not trusting his words, Krystal peered into his mind, turning over every pebble for the slightest hint of doubt. She found none. "I'll go slower this time."
She then pulled one of Fox's arms free and laid it beside his head. She took his hand into hers and gave it three short squeezes. "I want you to squeeze my hand like this from now on. If you stop, I'll know to pull out right away."
Fox squeezed Krystal's fingers gently. "Like this?"
"That's perfect." Fox then felt Krystal probe the hidden passageways inside his head from earlier. "Okay. I'm going to try again now."
The first time came as a shock. Now though, Fox had a better idea of what to expect. He tensed as Krystal plunged deep into his head again, but he kept his wits. She started slowly, checking Fox's grip occasionally. He squeezed her hand every few seconds, assuring Krystal that it was safe to proceed.
As she dug around, things drifted to Fox's surface. Memories. Feelings. Senses. Things he hadn't thought of in a long time. Things that he never paid much attention to, yet they always sat in the back of his mind. For a moment, Fox forgot where he was. The Great Fox stood around him. Empty but familiar. Home. Where was everybody?
"Fox!"
He opened his eyes with a jolt. He was back in the bedroom. Krystal watched him anxiously. Remembering what he was supposed to do, Fox squeezed Krystal's hand twice. "Sorry. Got lost in the memory."
Nodding, Krystal understood. She hadn't lost any ground before rousing him and continued to delve through more of Fox's past. Experiences paved the road through one's mind, Fox picked up from her. Following them would give Krystal the best chance to anchor herself inside his deepest recesses. Fox simply rode alongside, thinking only of Krystal's hand and compressing it. Eventually, he started to enjoy the process. It was like she was living his entire life through him, relishing every happy memory. Krystal beamed warmly as she enjoyed it too.
Though after a while, Fox began to worry. If she could relive his good times, then what about the bad ones? Soon after he thought about that, he remembered his worst memory. The day that Peppy told him about his dad's death. Krystal froze. Her heart and breath both seized inside her chest. James McCloud's image morphed into Thalse's for a moment. Sorrow blanketed Fox and Krystal both.
He'd gone through the motions before. Fox took several breaths and looked up at Krystal. She pulled away, meeting his gaze with tears in her eyes. "Fox… I'm so sorry… I didn't realise you were that young when it happened."
Fox glanced away. "I keep forgetting just how long it's been. Every time, it feels like it only happened recently."
Krystal hadn't quite gotten that fleeting image about Thalse out of her head. Fox held her while she tried to recollect herself. It wasn't easy. He suggested taking a break, yet Krystal refused. "I need to merge with all your memories. Even the painful ones," she told him. However, she did take a few more minutes before going back to work.
They decided to get through the harder memories first. Unfortunately for Krystal, Fox had a lot of them, mostly from the war. She didn't have to experience them all in detail, at least. Not yet. Just enough to acclimate more with Fox's psyche. She viewed each memory, kissed the pain away from the more confronting ones, and moved on to the next.
Then they reached Fox's first ordus encounter. It hit them hard and fast. It caught them in its iron grip. Krystal screamed as the beast swiped its claws. Her chest burst into flames. Her arm shattered inside its jaws. Terror and adrenaline raged through Krystal. She jerked away from the nightmare, sliding out from Fox's mind. He clamped down on her, mentally and physically, holding Krystal in place as she fought and thrashed.
"Krystal! It's okay! It's okay!" Fox grunted into her ear. "They're just my memories. They're not real."
"It hurts!" she cried. "It hurts!"
She was caught in the episode, he realised. Krystal fully believed that she was being mauled, herself, for real by that same bear. Thalse warned him that this might happen when merging with trauma. Fox only knew one way to break Krystal out of it.
"Not anymore," Fox insisted. "It did hurt, but you made it better. You saved my life and healed me. Remember that, Krystal."
He certainly did. And Fox channelled thoughts of those long weeks of her caring for him. Through them, he got better. He got to know her. And slowly, he began to fall in love with her. Fox washed those cherished memories over Krystal until her sobs settled and she quietened in his arms. He didn't keep track of how long he stroked her back, feeling her breathing steady.
Krystal tightened her arms around him. "I almost lost you that day…" she whimpered. "I almost never got to meet you."
Fox kissed between her ears. "But you did save me. That's the important thing. And I'll always be grateful for it."
She couldn't stop her tears. Fox let her cry, holding onto her for as long as she needed him to. His own pain gnawed at the fringes of his mind, but Krystal's took priority. He'd spent years coming to terms with it. This was all new to her. So, Fox hugged Krystal and whispered into her ear until her thoughts settled down.
"Do you want to take a break now?" Fox asked.
Krystal sniffed. "Not just yet. There's one more thing I need to do."
Turning back to the ordus memory, Krystal channelled something else into Fox's head. In her thoughts, she watched over Fox's prone and bloodied body until help arrived to take him back to Kezamat. Fox vaguely recalled her memories of the incident from the first day he woke up in the shrine. It was the day they met properly and learned each other's names.
Since then, Krystal tended to Fox day and night through the months that followed. She introduced him to the city, tutored him in her language alongside Nomar, and gave Fox the time and care he needed for his wounds to fully heal. That forged the lasting bond that brought them both to this present moment. A lifetime of love became possible, all because of one very bad day. It soothed them both enough for something to click in Fox's mind.
"I think that should do it," Krystal said. "I should be able to let the ehn form naturally on your side. Now we just have to work on mine."
Fox's head felt like it still had a hand shoved inside it. "How do we manage that?"
Uncertainty rumbled through Krystal. She pulled Fox's consciousness into hers, but she couldn't get him nearly as deep as she could go with him. She'd have better luck trying to swallow her own tongue. Her worry grew sharply.
"I… I don't know!" she fretted. "I thought I could do it all… But I can't! Now I don't…" Her pulse accelerated again. Fox quickly cupped her cheek in his hand.
"Hey! Hey! It's okay. Calm down," he cooed. "We'll figure this out together. Okay?" An idea then started to form. "Maybe now that we're connected, I can…?"
He imagined what he wanted to do. Krystal's telepathy slipped from her control and pushed itself further into her mind. She yelped in surprise and slight pain. Quickly taking over again, Krystal realised what Fox had done.
"You can use telepathy now," she gasped.
"Not exactly," Fox grunted, feeling his head throb. "I think I can use yours through the ehn to get to the back of your mind. But I'm no good at it yet. Don't know what I'm doing."
Krystal began to ponder. "I can guide you through it."
Closing her eyes, she sent a series of memories to Fox. All of them providing a basic understanding of how to use and control her telepathic powers. With that in hand, Fox probed around Krystal's consciousness and felt the pathways to the rest of her brain. Krystal flinched just as he had from the unfamiliar sensations. It was clumsy and rough at best. Fox gritted his teeth. This would all go so much more smoothly if she didn't have to do almost all the work all the time!
Fox paused. Where had that thought come from? A dreading chill filled him… No. It was filling Krystal! Tears swam in her eyes as Fox looked into her again and felt the echoes of that frustrated sentiment. Fox's heart then fell when he found the root of it.
Deep down, Krystal resented him. She resented his lack of psychic powers. And she resented the burden that it piled onto her as she had to instigate and sustain every mental connection they ever shared. It wasn't fair.
Shame overwhelmed Krystal. Sobs broke from her. She pushed Fox out from her mind and covered her face so that he wouldn't have to look at her. Fox reached out for her arm. His touch only made Krystal cry harder.
"Krystal…"
"I'm sorry…" she wept. "I'm so sorry…"
"Krystal, look at me."
"I know it's not your fault! I know it's not possible for you to do the things I want you to, so I shouldn't feel this way. But I do!"
Disgust at herself permeated every one of Krystal's thoughts. So much so that Fox felt ill inside his stomach. Those weren't his emotions he was experiencing though, he told himself sternly. Fox pulled Krystal into his arms and looked at the festering thoughts that tormented her more closely.
It had started as nothing at all. Fox's lack of powers surprised Krystal at first more than anything. She'd been overjoyed by the wonder she gave him as she linked their minds. But over the years, those little bits of effort accumulated. It was always Krystal who initiated their conversations. Never Fox. That imbalance began to tax her on a subconscious level. She understood that it was beyond Fox's abilities, but it would have been nice if he could have started the conversation at least once every now and again. Overall, it was a selfish and unreasonable desire. And Krystal now despised herself for it.
"I'm sorry… I'm sorry…"
Fox then coaxed her hands from her face. "Krystal… Please look at me," he said softly. She turned away, but Fox drew her muzzle back. "Please listen."
Fearfully, Krystal opened her eyes. Fox smiled briefly to calm her. "Krystal, I am so sorry that you've had to carry the burden for so long just to link us. And I am so grateful to you for doing so. Because you've shown me a whole new world that I'd never have been able to experience without you."
He pulled her into a hug. Krystal sniffled and held him tightly. "I want this ehn to help me take some of that burden off you," he continued. "That way, I can start the conversation with you, so you don't have to do it for me all the time."
A hiccup heaved inside Krystal's chest. "I'm sorry…"
Fox kissed her brow. "It's okay. We're going to have bad thoughts about each other every once in a while. That's part of the deal with ehns, right? Just don't let them get out of hand like this. Okay?"
"Okay…"
Fox smiled. "I love you, Krystal."
"I love you too."
He gave her a little more time to properly calm down. All the while, Fox continued to reassure Krystal that he wasn't hurt with her. He was more upset with himself for taking her abilities for granted for so long. It taught a lesson that they both still needed to communicate more on some things.
Eventually, Krystal felt better enough for them to resume. She now helped Fox, instructing him on navigating through the deeper subconscious to find the key nodes for him to connect his mind. Thankfully, Krystal didn't have many painful memories. The worst was her recollection of the nuhmryg epidemic, and more towards her guilt over the people she didn't save. Fox rode through every instance as Krystal relived it. At the heart of the pain was a node, where Krystal attached Fox for him.
There were good memories as well though. Plenty for Fox to relive with Krystal. Many more from her younger years for him to experience for the first time. She had grown up with a rich sense of wonder and life. With every memory that Fox saw and felt, he fell in love with Krystal just a little bit more than the moment before.
The process seemed to go on for hours. With each passing minute, Fox felt his connection to Krystal grow more solid and stable. His vision and hearing became fuzzy, and his head began to ache awfully. Eventually, neither he nor Krystal could do anything further. They were both so exhausted by that point.
They stopped. They collapsed upon the bed. Their eyelids hung heavy. Sleep felt like a good idea right now. As Fox gazed upon Krystal one last time, he saw a phantom of himself as well. He brushed Krystal's cheek and sighed under the gentle sensation. Her eyes closed first. His didn't stay open much longer. Before sleep finally claimed him, Fox heard an echo inside his mind.
"I love you."
"I love you."