No Hesitation

"Hey kiddo," Jay greeted as he saw his son come up the stairs at the district. "I'll be just a minute okay?"

"Yeah," Liam said as he and Ellie edged their way into the room. The team was working on a project that would keep them late so Jay asked Voight if he could have an hour dinner break to spend with his son. With permission granted, Ellie bundled Liam up and headed over, planning to spend time in a couple of small shops in the neighborhood while Liam and Jay ate dinner.

The last few days since the trip to the library, all he could picture was Emma and Liam curled up with a book, bonding in their mutual love of the written word. He was never much of a reader, he did occasionally whip through a mystery, but for the most part, he just didn't have the time or energy. But he had to admit, reading that bookmark, and envisioning the mother/son bonding only reminded him that he rarely had the same experience with Liam and it was really bothering him.

Jay came to the present and watched as Liam looked down at his shoes as Ellie bent down and whispered something to him. He nodded as she took his hat and gloves from him and then nodded some encouragement. He looked over at Jay but then began to walk towards Kim who was sitting at her desk. He unzipped his coat as he went and seemed hesitant and awkward as he slowly approached.

"Hey Liam, how are you buddy." She asked turning in her seat to look at him as he arrived.

Liam looked back at Ellie, who once again nodded encouragement and it suddenly hit Jay who the little project from the craft book might be for.

"Hi," he said quietly. "Um, um, my dad told me about—about what happened. About the baby," Liam stammered. "In a few months we were going to pick out a present, since—well I thought I'd give you a gift instead," he said his voice drifting off. "Um, anyway, I'm really sorry."

"Thank you Liam," Kim said. "That's very sweet."

"Um, I do have something for you." He said jamming his hand in his coat pocket. "I made it, so it's not that good, but I worked kinda hard on it and Ellie helped me. She took me to the craft store. I didn't know what your favorite things were so I just put some stuff that I thought looked cool." Liam pulled out a woven bracelet made of purple, blue and black, a darkened sunset of colors. Woven into the strands were a sun, moon and stars.

"I did the sun, because even if we can't see it, it will always come up and will eventually come out from behind the clouds even if it tries to stay there for days and days. The moon, because even when it's dark, the moon will help us see. And the stars, because even though we can't see them in the city, we know they are there and there's a lot of them."

Kim just sat and stared at the bracelet, then she took it and reached out and pulled Liam into a hug and began to cry. Liam just stood still, mortified that he had upset her as she released him. "I'm sorry. I didn't mean—I didn't mean to make her cry," Liam stammered as Adam walked over to him and Jay took a few steps forward.

Adam looked at Kim who was clutching the gift as tears flooded from her eyes. "You didn't make her cry." He said.

"I did. Look," Liam said pointing out what he felt was obvious. "I'm sorry Kim. I'm sorry." He apologized, but all she could do was cry.

"Okay, she is crying, but it is because what you gave her is so very special." Adam explained.

"It's nothing big. Not a big deal."

"It's a very big deal. A very big deal," he repeated. "It meant that you were thinking about her and wanted to help her when she was sad."

"But I made it worse."

"No you didn't. Emotions are complicated. You've seen a team win the Stanley Cup or the World Series and the players have cried right?" Liam nodded. "Do you think they're sad?"

"No," Liam admitted.

"Right, they're so happy they cry."

"I don't think she's very happy," Liam pointed out.

"I'm crying because this is the most beautiful thing that anyone has done for me in a very long time. I love it and think you did a fantastic job on it. I can tell you worked really hard. And what the beads stand for is a beautiful sentiment. Did you think of those all by yourself?"

"Yeah," Liam admitted.

"I am so impressed," Kim said as she took a tissue from Hailey who had walked over.

"You put it on and tie it there," Liam said as he pointed to the dangling strings. "If you want to wear it all the time you can cut the strings so they don't get in the way. But you can just kinda tie them loosely so you can take it off."

"Help me Adam?" She asked as she draped the bracelet over her wrist. He tied it in a double knot per her request. She then opened her desk drawer and pulled her scissors out.

"Are you sure?" Liam asked. "I mean it's nothing fancy."

"It's better than fancy," she said as she nodded to Adam to cut the dangling strings.

She got up and pulled Liam into another hug. "Thank you so much. It means a lot to me."

Liam looked up as she let him go a big smile on her face. "You're welcome. I'm glad you like it."

"I do. I really do," Kim said, meaning every word.

Liam walked back towards Ellie as Jay put his finger up. "Just give me one more second and we're outta here, okay?"

Liam nodded and exhaled the anxiety that he had been holding the last few minutes. "You did great," Ellie said as Adam walked over. "I'm going to head out Jay. Let me know when and where you want me to meet you."

"I sure will. Thanks Ellie, I appreciate it. All of it," he said smiling. He then looked down at his son. "You did a good thing and a fantastic job. I'll be ready in a minute," he promised as he headed back to his desk.

"Yes you did do a great job." Adam agreed. "I have to ask your dad, but I thought I'd start with you."

"Okay?" Liam said.

"We had fun in October right? At the pumpkin thing."

"Yeah. It was great."

"Would you be interested in hanging out with me again on a Saturday or something?" He asked, looking a little nervous like he was going to be shot down by a girl that he was inviting to the prom.

"Sure. What should we do?"

"You pick. As long as your dad says it's okay."

Liam smiled. "He will. Don't worry."

"Where are we going to eat?" Liam asked as they finally got out the door.

"The falafel place," Jay said. "You like falafel's right?"

"Yep," Liam said as they approached the intersection. The small family-owned diner was just a couple of blocks from the district, making for a short walk. Liam slid his hand in his father's and looked up at him with a slight smile.

"Hungry?" Jay asked.

"Yeah. Really, really hungry. I can eat a lot."

"What's a lot?"

"A lot, a lot."

"Wow, that much huh?" Jay said looking down at his son. "You did a wonderful thing by giving Kim that bracelet."

"I wanted to cheer her up, I guess."

"I think you did."

"Adam said she cried because it made her happy, but I'm not so sure."

"She cried because it felt very special that you did that for her. It's kind of complicated."

"I'll say." Liam said as the light changed and they walked across the street. "Dad?"

"Yeah, buddy."

"Adam wants to take me somewhere again. I think it's because he's sad too."

"You're probably right. Do you want to hang out with him?"

"Yes. He's fun."

"Where are you going to go?"

"I'm supposed to pick."

"Well then I guess you'll have to think about it. Hey, I really did like that bracelet, it was pretty cool. You did a great job on it."

"You think so?"

"Definitely."

"I can make you one too." Liam offered.

"Yeah?"

"Yeah," Liam said with a nod. "Do you want me to?"

"Most definitely," Jay said as they made their way inside the restaurant.

The place had stood at this address forever, changing hands every decade or so. It was a place where the tables wobbled and matchbooks had once steadied them eventually giving way to folded napkins crammed up under there. The few booths had duct tape mending wounds that would never heal. It looked aged and worn out, but it was clean, the food amazing and authentic to whichever nationality held it at the time, and always with seemingly fair prices.

They stopped at the register and ordered before heading back to a booth along the back wall to wait for their dinner. As they ate they talked about school, homework, and the fact that Chrissy Klein kept sticking her tongue out at Liam and had wanted to sit next to him at lunch all week.

"I think she likes you," Jay teased.

"But girls are gross," Liam complained.

"I bet they won't be so gross next year. I'm going to go and get the bathroom code so you can wash up. You've got tzatziki sauce all over your face."

"And hands," Liam said holding them up.

Jay smiled and went to the counter and got the daily code. Many restaurants had a pad on the bathrooms so that they couldn't be used by non-customers, especially the homeless who would go in and stay for far too long. Jay went back and punched in the four digits and watched Liam go inside. "Use soap," he yelled behind him.

"Yeah, yeah," Liam replied as the door closed.

Jay cleaned up the table and dumped their garbage and put the tray up as a woman walked in with her young daughter. They took a moment to order and the girl walked back towards Jay and sat down in a booth across from where he and Liam had been sitting. The woman looked back at her daughter and smiled at Jay as something caught his eye and his heart began to hammer in his chest. He saw Liam come out of the bathroom and immediately grabbed him and shoved him under the table that they had just left. The boys eyes were huge and confused as Jay put his finger to his lips, his eyes pleading for Liam to follow his instructions. He turned back towards the little girl who was sitting in the booth behind him, she could clearly see what was happening as the man screamed at the front. He again put his finger to his lips and as gently as possible he put her under the table with Liam.

"Stay here and be quiet," Jay said, hoping the gunman at the front was still so focused on the cash register that he still hadn't noticed the activity in the back.

"Daddy, no," Liam whispered.

"Please stay here. It'll be okay," Jay said before he turned, pulled his gun from his holster and held it behind his back as he crept up to the front of the restaurant.

"But you don't have your vest on," Liam said quietly to the now empty air as the girl next to him began to cry. "Shhh," Liam told her. "Hold your hands over your mouth like this," he said clamping his hands over his own mouth as an example. He removed them and told her, "It'll be okay, my dad is a police officer, he always gets the bad guy."

But just as Liam finished his sentence a shot rang out followed by a scream causing Liam to scramble halfway out from under the table. He barely restrained himself from screaming out for his father. He saw him raise his gun, the robber still seemingly unaware of his presence, he yelled 'Chicago PD, drop your weapon' only for the man to turn and reach for the girl's mother who was standing there, but before he could get a hold of her Jay shot him in the chest causing him to crash to the floor, the blood already staining the linoleum.

Liam finished his scramble and stood up beside the booth and stared at the chaos in front of him. "Dad!" He yelled out causing Jay to look back at him.

"Stay there," he yelled, turning his attention back to the downed subject in front of him. He kicked the gun away as the woman stood there in shock, her entire body trembling. The restaurant owner, who was still shaking from having a bullet fired at her by the robber, came around the counter and stared down at the assailant. Jay pulled out his cell phone and made the call that there had been an armed robbery with shots fired, the offender down and a plain clothes police officer on the scene along with several civilians.

Jay put his finger to the man's neck to check for a pulse and found a weak one. He walked over and secured the gun, keeping an eye on the injured man. He grabbed a handful of napkins and held them to the wound for a moment. He then checked to make sure the two women were okay and got the owner to continue to apply pressure to the wound. He ran back towards his son, realizing he couldn't hide the blood on his hands, literally or metaphorically, but Liam met him half way jumping into his arms. "Are you okay?"

"Yes," Liam assured. "But she won't come out," he said pointing towards the girl who was still under the table.

"Okay," Jay said as he set Liam down and grabbed some more napkins from a nearby table and began to wipe some of the blood off. He knew he should go back and continue to apply pressure to the offenders wound but the kids were going to come first. He got on his hands and knees and peered under the table. "Hi sweetie, what's your name?"

"Addy," she sniffed.

"Hi Addy, I'm Jay and this is my son Liam. He's ten. How old are you?"

"Nine," she replied.

Jay shifted and sat down as Liam crawled over next to him. "Can you come out? I'm sure your mom would like to see you. She's okay. Only the bad guy was shot."

"But I heard two bullets," she argued.

"One went into the wall." Jay explained as sirens could be heard.

"Where did the other one go?"

"Into the bad guy," Liam said.

"Is he dead?" She asked.

"No, but he is bleeding a lot. I need to go check on him. Liam can stay here with you okay?"

"Okay," she whispered.

"You can't leave," Liam argued.

"I need to try and stop the bleeding," Jay explained as he looked down to see Mrs. Maumoun continuing to hold pressure on the wound. "It's part of my responsibility to render aid."

"But you're the one that shot him. How can you try and save his life?" Liam wanted to know.

"Because that's part of my job too." Jay got up and saw that the restaurant owner had already replaced the napkins with a towel and was using all of her tiny frame to staunch the bleeding. "I'll take over," Jay said as Voight and the team barreled in.

Jay began to explain what happened as an ambulance showed up. Adam charged to the back with Hailey to find Liam coaxing Addy out from under the table. Adam picked her up and carried her to her grateful mother who was still having a difficult time getting her body to respond to her wishes. But she finally was able to get her body parts in sync when she saw her daughter and the two embraced as a second ambulance pulled up and Hailey led them out to it.

"Is that your sitter?" Adam asked as Ellie came charging across the street and peered into the restaurant as the paramedics rushed in to tend to the bleeding offender.

"Stay there," Jay instructed. "This is a crime scene. We're fine, we're okay." He said as he walked to meet her.

"Oh thank God," she said, sighing in relief.

Jay stepped outside with Liam practically attached to him. "Why don't you two go home." He said as he pulled his phone out.

"I want to stay with you Dad," Liam said, his face beginning to scrunch up in an effort not to cry. "I don't want to go home."

Jay put his arm around him and Liam practically climbed up him until Jay pulled him up with one arm and balanced him on his hip.

"It's okay Liam. We can go home and have some hot chocolate and watch a movie." Ellie promised.

"I want to stay here," Liam protested again.

"It's okay." Jay acquiesced. "I've got him. I ordered you an Uber. It should be here in a minute." Jay told her.

"You sure? I can take him."

"Thank you, but I'm sure. I think we need to be together tonight. I'll figure it out."

"Okay," she agreed. She told Liam goodbye and went to the curb to wait for her ride.

With much discussion, it was decided that Addy and her mother would go to the hospital for precautionary measures since they were both quite rattled and would give their statements there. Kevin was taking Liam back to the district and Ellie was on the way back to her apartment.

"You sure you're okay?" Kevin asked Liam again as they stepped out onto the sidewalk in front of the diner.

"Yep," he said grabbing the man's bicep so Kevin could pull him up. Liam often used him as a human jungle gym.

"So we're walking back to the district?"

"Yes. I walked here, I'll walk back. It gets out some energy. Or at least that's what my dad says."

Kevin nodded. "Yeah, he's probably right."

"How long will my dad have to stay at the scene?"

"I'm not sure. Hopefully not too long. I'll race you to the light," Kevin said and took off at a slow run, with Liam chasing him.

Once back inside the building they made their way up the steps, breathless and with a little less energy than they had earlier. "Did it work? Are you tired?" Kevin asked.

"Maybe a little bit." Liam replied.

"How about we get some hot chocolate and then we go over your statement. Maybe by the time we're done your dad will be back."

Liam agreed, especially to the hot chocolate. He told Kevin exactly what he remembered and it seemed to jive with what Jay had explained. "I mean he just shot him right in the chest, like it was no big deal." Liam said.

"That's called training and your dad has had a lot of it."

"Yeah, I guess. Can you check and see when he'll get here?"

"He'll get here when he's done. Don't you want to hang out with me? You're going to make me feel bad." Kevin said picking Liam up and holding him upside down and shaking him until the boy laughed. "Shake all that energy right out of you."

"I give, I give up. You win, you have all my energy," Liam gasped.

"Let's see what we can find to do," he suggested as he looked around the office. By the time Jay got back Liam was putting the finishing touches on his paper airplane and Kevin looked a little worn down.

"Look Dad, mine flies better than Kevin's," Liam bragged.

"It does? I don't think so," Kevin disagreed.

"Well, let's see them," Jay said, looking worn down himself and ready for a break.

The two participants stood side by side and guided their planes into flight, while Kevin's hit the wall, Liam's found its way to the stairwell and nearly missed Voight as he came up the stairs.

"See, mine went farther," Liam stated.

"It sure did, it sure did," Kevin agreed.

"Thanks for taking care of him," Jay said as Liam retrieved his plane.

"No problem, I got his statement, we had hot chocolate, his had extra chocolate, we played Eye Spy, Simon Says, Follow the Leader and then made our totally awesome planes."

"Did he seem okay?"

"Actually, yeah, he seemed fine."

"Hey buddy, I'm going to make a few notes and then we'll go home. I'll write up my report tomorrow."

"But now you have to do that tomorrow and what you were you going to do tonight and that will make you really late won't it?"

"I'm afraid so." Jay admitted.

"Can I come tomorrow night for dinner?" Liam asked, with hope in his eyes.

"We'll see."

"That means no," Liam said.

"It means we'll see," Jay repeated.

"Look what Kevin can do," Liam said jumping up and grabbing the man's arm. "Pick me up," he demanded.

Kevin lifted his arm along with the attached child, causing Liam to giggle. "Look Dad, cool right?"

"Very cool," Jay agreed. "Let's go kid, let Kevin rest for the night." He said giving up on his notes, figuring the ones he took at the scene would suffice.

"Okay. Bye Kevin. I had fun. Thank you!" He said turning and wrapping his arms around the man who reciprocated, squeezing the boy gently and patting his back.

Liam stared out of the truck window, still wired, he kicked the seat in front of him the entire way home. Jay kept peeking at him in the rearview mirror. "It's late, you need to wind down a bit," he told his son.

"What if I can't?" Liam asked as Jay began to look for a parking spot near their apartment.

"You can try."

"Will you read with me?"

"Maybe for a few minutes."

Jay loved having the truck but trying to find parking spots big enough to accommodate it, could be difficult at times. He finally found a spot and parallel parked like the practiced veteran that he was and went around and met Liam as he hopped out. "Can you carry me? I'm tired."

"Oh, now you're tired," Jay said shaking his head. "Come here," he said reaching out. Liam got out and leaned against his father. Jay reached down and picked him up. "One day soon I won't be able to do this." He said aloud, while treasuring the fact that he still could.

"Okay, pajamas, brush your teeth, wash your face, pick out a book. Go!" Jay instructed once they got inside.

Liam complied, going through the motions while Jay just stood and thought about how different the night could have gone. The 'what-if's' were whirling around in his mind. What if the subject hadn't been so tweaked out of his mind he would have been less focused on the prize in front of him and more on the CPD Detective heading his way. What if he had come in shooting? What if, Liam had gotten caught in the crossfire? All he had wanted was to carve out a little time to spend with his child and it had nearly ended in tragedy.

"I'm ready Dad," Liam sang out, sounding too enthusiastic as he jumped into bed and handed a book to Jay.

"The Boy Who Saved Baseball," Jay read. "Where did you get this book?"

"Mrs. Harris gave it to me. I shoveled her sidewalk last week and she called me to come to her house yesterday and gave me that. She got it from Amazon. It said it was a must read for fifth grade boys, especially ones that played baseball. I've read two chapters so far."

"I see that," Jay said finding the bookmark that Emma had personalized nestled in-between two pages. "Can we talk for a second first?"

"Do I have a choice?" Liam asked.

"Not really." Jay said with a slight smile. "I just want to know how you feel about what happened tonight?"

"I'm okay."

"Do you want to talk to Dr. Sawyer or Dr. Charles about it?"

"No. I really am okay."

Jay was a little concerned about his son's lack of concern. "Sometimes when things like this happen, it takes some time for it to sink in."

"I'm good Dad. Can we just read please?"

"Okay. But if you need to talk to anyone, including me, just let me know okay?"

"Okay," Liam said snuggling into the covers.

Jay read a few pages and then Liam read the rest of the chapter, before closing the book for the night. He put the book on the nightstand and pulled the covers up and kissed Liam on the forehead. "I love you kiddo,"

"I love you too."

Jay went to the door, his hand hovering near the light switch. He thought about how the mother and daughter had been traumatized and here his son was acting as if nothing had happened. "So you really are alright?"

"Yes Dad," Liam said, frustration in his voice. "You want to know why, right? How can I act like nothing happened right?"

"I'm afraid that you are just telling me what I want to hear."

"No. I really am fine. Do you want to know why?"

"Why?"

"Because you were there. Because you protected all of us."

"Okay. I'm glad I was there."

"The woman and her daughter, they didn't know you or what you would do and what you didn't do."

"What didn't I do?" Jay asked puzzled.

"Hesitate. You never hesitated. You weren't going to let anything happen to us no matter what. And best of all, you didn't let anything happen to you. Good night Dad," Liam said rolling over, leaving Jay to stand and ponder what his son had just said.