This was a request on behalf of a special niece. I hope it came out okay—I did what I could. I'll have to skip next week as I haven't had much time and have a few things to polish up. But then I should be able to be on a weekly schedule for the final run. Thank you all for reading.

Apologies Abound

Jay sat at the traffic light and could see his son with the daycare provider on the front sidewalk waiting for him. She had him engaged in what looked like a game of Simon Says, although Liam didn't look very interested, his actions tired and half-hearted. As he got closer she took Liam's hand and pointed at the truck, her mouth moving with an explanation. Jay knew he was in for a lecture and he completely deserved it. It was 8:30 p.m. and the center closed at 8:00. He had gotten caught up with a case and forgotten about Liam. Well, he hadn't really forgotten, he remembered that he had a son, but the part about the fact he needed to be picked up by 8:00 had slipped his mind.

He was still getting used to this full-time father thing and it was kicking his ass. Now he had an angry teacher and very upset five-year-old glaring at him. He pulled into the pick-up lane and hopped out of the truck, his apologies slipping from his lips immediately.

"You forgot me!" Liam accused, tears already hanging from his eyelashes.

"I didn't forget you kiddo, I just was really busy and couldn't stop to call."

"Detective Halstead, we appreciate what you do for a living and your circumstances, but it is extremely important that Liam is picked up on time. You dropped him off at 7:30 this morning that is too long of a day for a child his age to be away from home."

"You're right, it's just that some days—well we can't schedule when things happen."

"I understand, but perhaps there is a proxy that can pick Liam up when you are otherwise engaged. A grandparent maybe?"

Jay bristled at the word grandparent. His father would more than likely pick Liam up if Jay couldn't but the problem was he would never let Jay forget about it. He had already told Jay more than once that he needed to find a different job; Jay certainly didn't need to give Pat any more ammunition.

"My brother just moved back in town. I'm pretty sure he gets off work around 6:00."

"Okay. Tomorrow when you drop Liam off you can fill out the paperwork. There will also be an additional charge added for being late today."

"I understand," Jay said picking Liam up and getting him settled in the car seat.

"I'm really sorry, I won't let it happen again," Jay assured.

"We hope that it doesn't," the teacher said with a tight smile.

He could only imagine how much extra this would cost. He recalled reading something about an extra fifty dollars for every fifteen minutes a parent was late.

"I'm sorry buddy, I really am. We'll do something fun this weekend I promise."

"I was there all day and everybody left 'cept me. I was all by myself and you weren't coming. Miss Amelia said you didn't call."

"She said that?"

"I heard her tell Mrs. Leoni that."

"I called and spoke to Mrs. Leoni and told her I was on my way." Jay said, but it had been after 8:00. He hadn't thought to call when they arrived at the stash house at 7:20, that he should step way and just pick-up Liam or at least call.

He looked back to see Liam crying, his tears fat and falling rapidly. He knew Liam was exhausted, all day in a stimulating environment, no nap, up at 6:00 that morning. Now it was dark and Liam had every right to be upset and cranky.

"I was so busy getting the bad guys and suddenly it was late." Jay tried.

"I hate you!" Liam screamed out. "I hate you. I hate you." He tried to kick the seat in front of him but his little legs couldn't quite reach it.

"Hey now young man," Jay snapped. "It's okay for you tell me you are mad at me or that you hate the fact that I was late, but we don't tell people we hate them."

"But I hate you," Liam screamed so loudly Jay thought his ears would bleed.

"That's enough," I'm not going to tell you again," Jay said sharply. But when he looked in the rearview mirror, Liam was nodding off.

Once home Jay carried Liam inside, happy for the assault on his ears to be put on hold. But once he set him down Liam was awake once again. "I'm thirsty," he said as Jay put the boys backpack aside.

"I'll get you some juice." He grabbed a cup and filled it halfway with juice and then topped it off with water and handed it to his son. "Drink up, then pajamas and story time." Jay said hoping the promise of a story would mollify his son into being cooperative.

"What about bath time?"

"It's late, no bath tonight." Jay replied as Liam handed him his empty cup.

"I played in the sandbox and got sand on me," Liam explained pointing to his legs. "I'm still thirsty."

"We'll wipe you down with a wet washcloth," Jay said as he gave Liam a half glass of water.

A quick wipe down, pajamas, bathroom time and a story, Liam fell asleep in the middle of the story. Jay took a deep breath and then called Will to tell him he was on backup duty for his nephew. Not long after that Jay crashed in his own bed and didn't wake up until his alarm bleated incessantly at him the next morning, where he looked over to discover Liam next to him.

"Morning kiddo," he said. He often found the boy in his bed and he wasn't sure if it was because of nightmares or his mother leaving. He had always seemed to stay in his own bed at his mom's house, but would often find his way into Jay's bed during the night even when Emma was still around.

"Daddy, I have to tell you something, but you can't get mad."

"Okay," Jay sighed, he was still tired from yesterday and in no mood for this.

"Promise?" Liam asked.

"Okay. I promise. What is it?"

"I peed the bed," Liam said his face scrunching up as the words were spoken.

Jay did his best not to flip out. Liam had never been a bed wetter. "Your bed or mine?" But he already knew as the scent of urine wafted his way. He pulled the covers back to find a large wet spot underneath his son.

"I'm sorry Daddy, I'm sorry," Liam cried as Jay came around and lifted him off the mattress.

Liam was mess and this was the last thing Jay needed this morning. "Take your pajama pants off," Jay instructed. As soon as Liam did, Jay gingerly picked them up and put them on the soiled bed. He then pulled the boy's top off and threw it on the pile. He picked Liam up, held him out away from him, his forearms bearing much of the weight, and set the boy in the tub. "Stay here, I'll be right back"

Jay then stripped the bed, put the wettest items in the washer and pushed the soak button before returning to his son.

"You need a shower," Jay said when he found Liam in the bathroom, pushing a toy boat around the empty bathtub.

"I just take baths," Liam argued.

"We don't have time for that."

"I don't like showers," Liam claimed.

"I take showers every day," Jay explained.

"You take one with me!"

Jay blew out a mouth of air. He didn't think it would be great if Liam went to day care and talked about how he and his dad showered together that morning. "Just you, I'll be right here. It's just like playing in the rain. You like to play in the rain." Jay turned the tap on and had Liam feel the temperature of the water. "Is this good?"

"I guess," Liam shrugged.

"Stand here," Jay said pulling him back out of the way and angling the shower head down. "Then you can step in the spray when it's nice and warm."

"I want a bath."

"Liam, I just told you there's no time for a bath. Now let's go."

Liam's face puckered up and he began to cry. Jay had neither the patience nor the time for this. As harsh as it was to think, his job just didn't allow him to be a full-time dad. He liked being a weekend dad, he simply couldn't handle this type of stuff every day. This was Emma's strong suit. However, she was gone and he was here and more importantly Liam was here with him. And now Liam was crying in the shower because he had had an accident in the bed. Most likely because it didn't occur to Jay that giving him nearly two glasses of liquid right before bed wasn't a good idea. He had always woke up in the past, but the kid was probably so tired that he just slept through the urge.

"If we hurry, we can go down to the bakery and you can pick out a doughnut for breakfast," Jay tried.

Liam's face smoothed out as he looked at his father. "With chocolate frosting?"

"Sure. But you have to get under the water. I'll help soap you up and we'll be done really fast."

Liam wasn't thrilled, especially when he had to stand under the water to be rinsed off, but he tolerated it. As soon as he was done, Jay sent him off to get dry and took his own speed shower. The washer wasn't even close to being done before they left and he had to make a mental note to try and swing by the apartment later and switch it out. He had put a couple of old towels over the wet spot and put some of his weights on top of them to help soak up the urine. He wanted to check on that too.

The bakery took longer than he had hoped and by the time they got to the daycare center, Liam was covered in chocolate frosting. Jay was exasperated and it was only 7:40 in the morning. He didn't have any wipes or towels so he had take Liam by his sticky hand and lead him into the center. They immediately met one of the teachers who looked at Liam and then back up at Jay and though her face remained stoic, he could read her frustration and disappointment all over it.

"It looks like we had a yummy breakfast," she said tightly. "Say goodbye to Daddy and we'll go get you cleaned up."

"Bye Daddy," Liam waved his backpack shifting with his double-armed wave.

"We'll see you tonight, but not too late," the teacher called back to him.

"Not late," Liam echoed as he was led away.

Jay felt like an utter failure. He turned to leave when Miss Amelia seemingly popped out of nowhere. "We need you to fill out those forms to make your brother your proxy if you can't pick Liam up on time.

"Now?" Jay questioned looking down at his watch.

"I'm afraid after last night; yes it has to be done immediately. It won't take long, but your brother will need to either stop by or send us a signed copy of the form along with an image of his driver's license. The first time he's here we'll scan it into our system.

Jay didn't seem to have much of choice so he texted Erin that he would be a bit late and hoped for the best. He and Voight had had their bumps, they didn't see eye to eye on some things and he didn't seem to be all that pleased with Jay's interest in Erin.

Once at work he and Erin were paired up to go investigate a few person's of interest in a case they were working on. Jay explained his late night pick-up, early morning surprise and the wrath of the day care.

"Welcome to motherhood," Erin laughed.

"I can't do it. I'm not cut out for it." Jay argued.

"You can do it. You will do it. You are all Liam has. Have you heard anything from his mother?"

"Nothing," he sighed. "There seemed something totally off when she told me she was leaving. The phone number is bogus. I don't think she's coming back anytime soon."

"Kids wet the bed, be lucky you haven't had to deal with it until now."

"Do you think it will happen again?"

"No—maybe. Look, the poor kid was traumatized, you let him chug down a bunch of liquid right before bed and he was exhausted after thirteen hours at daycare."

"I was late, but I don't think he was traumatized."

"Sure he was. He just lost his mother, she basically disappeared without much of a warning and then you don't show up. He watches all of the other kids go home one-by-one and still no you. He must have terrified that he had lost you too. You said he yelled that he hated you."

"Yeah, I didn't think he'd be that upset."

"Of course he was Jay! Wake up! Okay, think back to when you were a kid and maybe stayed out past your curfew—were your parents relieved when you first got home?" Jay nodded. "Then they were pissed and you probably got into trouble right?"

"Yeah. Once I managed to get turned around when I was riding my back and left my neighborhood. My dad found me after dark and I thought he was going to be so mad when he saw me, but he was calm. But after we got home he let me have it."

"Just like Liam. He was relieved to see you, then once he saw you were okay his emotions took over. His five-year-old vocabulary came up with what it could."

Jay looked off into the distance. "I don't know if I can do this job and raise him alone. Both demand so much time and attention. I want to get off early enough to eat dinner with him, but that's unlikely."

"Leave it to me, I've got it in with the boss," Erin said with a smile.

Jay was at the day care at 6:02 p.m. trying to dodge the mad rush of parents with more typical jobs as they hurried in alone and came back out with a child in tow. Suddenly Liam came tearing out from the back screaming Daddy at the top of his lungs. "You came in time," he said breathlessly as he jumped into his father's arms.

"I sure did. How about we go get something to eat," Jay offered.

"Yes!" Liam agreed his head nodding up and down.

"We appreciate your timeliness this evening," a woman, who Jay hadn't met, said. Did everyone know that he blew it last night? "You're brother stopped by earlier today and got everything on file and even ate lunch with Liam. You can do that as well if you'd like sometime."

"Absolutely," Jay smiled as best as he could. "I'm glad everything is all taken care of now." He said before he and Liam made their way back out into the Chicago summertime heat.

Jay wasn't sure what he was feeling as he buckled Liam into his car seat. At least Will was on the ball. His son tugged him one way, work pulled him the other way, he was wondering how long it would be until he split in two.

Jay decided that Liam's favorite vegan restaurant in the south loop was probably the best idea, except for the parking issue. Usually when they went, it was the weekend or they took the train. Most people were heading out of the downtown area and Jay found a spot a few blocks away. He swung Liam up on his shoulders and they made their way down the street.

"My favorite Daddy," Liam squealed when he saw where they were going. "Can I have a milkshake?"

"Not now, maybe after."

"How come not now?"

"Because you'll fill up on it and won't eat your dinner."

Liam mashed his lips together trying to decide if he was okay with this explanation. Jay noticing his son's internal debate and picked him up. "If you finish most of your dinner you can get a milkshake. Deal?"

"Deal," Liam said twisting his body to get down.

They got their food and sat down by the window next to the alley, where a truck idled as men loaded and unloaded chairs into and out of the building across the way.

"How as daycare today?" Jay asked as he shoved a french fry in his mouth.

"It was good. I played in the sand box again and at the water table."

"Wow," Jay exclaimed.

"Then I played tag with Skylar. I'm fast."

"I bet you are."

"Did you catch bad guys today?"

"We were on the lookout for some. Listen Liam, I wanted to talk about last night. I'm really sorry that I didn't pick you up on time. And you had every right to be mad at me."

"I don't hate you," Liam said putting his sandwich down and looking at the table.

"I know you don't. And I understand why you were upset and like I said last night it was okay that you were angry with me."

"I was scared. You didn't come and I was all by myself and I thought you went with Mommy. I didn't mean to make the bed messy. I promise," Liam said, teardrops beginning to fall.

Jay was going to tell him not to cry but he bit his tongue. "I'm so sorry buddy. I don't want to be late but sometimes I have to be. I know it's hard not having Mommy around and that I'm not doing a very good job."

"When's Mommy coming back?" Liam asked looking up with a tear stained face.

"Honestly, I don't know son. I miss her too. I'm sure she misses you so much."

"Then why did she leave?"

"I'm sure she had a really good reason."

"Like why you were late yesterday?"

"Yes, like that. I know that she loves you so much, just like I love you so much."

"I'm not mad at you anymore."

"I'm glad to hear that. I am sorry I was late. We have it all set up so that if I'm going to be late, Uncle Will is going to pick you up."

"Okay. Daycare is hard to deal with all day," Liam said sounding exasperated.

After dinner they walked around downtown while Liam drank his milkshake, before heading home. Once back in their apartment, Jay switched out the laundry again, running everything through the wash a second time. He went to check his bed and found Liam standing there. He had had his usual bath and was clean and in his pajamas. "Sorry," he said.

"I know it was an accident and accidents happen. But I think no more late drinks."

"But that was cause you were late."

"That is true. You are right. So I won't let it happen again."

Jay and Erin and picked up some cleaner and worked on the bed during the work day, and other than a slight stain, the bed was as good as new. Jay made the bed with his spare sheets and then climbed up and laid down on it, patting the spot next to him for Liam to join him.

Liam climbed up and snuggled in next his father. "How come you come and sleep in my bed during the night?" Liam shrugged. "Did you go in and sleep with Mommy?"

"No."

"Are you scared? Do you have bad dreams?"

"No."

"You know I won't leave you in the middle of the night right?" Jay had made it clear that he didn't have any child care for the middle of the night yet and was not to be called. He didn't have the heart to wake up Will, who would have to be at work early and would have no place for Liam to go when he got there. He had to find a good sitter for when school started—as if wonderful, available and affordable sitters just fell out of trees.

"I know."

"Then how come you don't stay in your bed?"

"Because you need me," Liam explained.

"I do?"

"Yes. You tell me."

"How do I tell you?"

"I don't know but you do. Can you tell me a story about when you were in the army?" Liam asked.

"How about we go to your room and get in your bed."

"Will you get in my bed with me?"

"I will," Jay said standing up and leaning over to scoop Liam up. He jiggled him all the way to his room causing the boy to have fits of laughter. "How about you brush your teeth and use the bathroom, then we'll have story time."

"Okay," Liam said and scampered off.

Jay watched from afar as Liam did his business and then followed him into the bedroom and had Liam slip under the covers while he stayed on top. "How about I read a story?"

"No. I want a daddy story from the army."

Jay wasn't sure where this request was coming from. Liam knew he had been in the army and in the war, but they didn't speak of it much. And there weren't a whole lot of stories that were appropriate for a five-year-old. Jay tried to get Liam to agree to a book, but there was no changing his mind and he felt as if he owed the kid so he cleared his throat and told Liam all about the goat herders he saw and the antics of the baby goats. He moved on to playing soccer with the local kids and being on top of mountains so high he could touch the sky.

Finally Liam slipped off to sleep and Jay carefully extracted himself as to not wake him. He thought about what Liam had said about Jay telling him he needed him in the night. He knew he had nightmares, but didn't think he cried out. None of the women he had every spent the night with had ever said anything, but then if he wasn't alone maybe the dreams didn't come.

Whether he liked it or not, it seemed as if it was going to be just he and Liam; late nights, screaming tantrums and wet beds may very well be his future, but so were bedtime stories, big hugs and a lot of love.