Chapter 22: Next To Her, I Feel Whole

Disclaimer: I don't own Neon Genesis Evangelion. It belongs to Hideaki Anno, Gainax, and Tatsunoko Productions. I only own the characters I made up.

"Do you really think this can last," asks a familiar yet harsh voice. "Is that what you really think?"

The sound of silence echoes across the entire white void.

"I. . .I don't know."

It's. . .difficult to look at the person speaking. The deep resentment radiating from him is enough to make anyone sick. Yet, there's also a cadence of deep sadness whenever he speaks, mixed with the fiery rage in his eyes. Perhaps it's all of these traits combined which makes it difficult for me to even be in his presence.

So. . .I look at the ground, the only form of "escape" I have from this entire situation. My entire standing posture is that of a child deeply ashamed of what he's done. With the direction this "conversation" is heading, it's no surprise why I feel this way.

"But," I manage to say. "I know that I want to make the most of what I have now."

"You're stalling."

"How am I stalling," I ask, voice laced with irritation. "The only way to get home is to let Ritsuko do her work! There's literally nothing more I can do!"

"You don't know that," the boy responds. "You never even tried to do anything else! You just waste your time, fighting for a world that isn't even yours! Helping those who keep hurting you over and over again! If you keep fighting for them, it'll make it harder for you to leave!"

I go silent.

"Or. . .maybe that's your problem," the boy. . .no. . . Shinji says, realization washing over him. "You want to stay, do you?"

The silence is the only answer he needs.

"How could you," Shinji asks in a low growl. "I thought you cared about your brother! I thought you actually cared! Yet you'll leave him behind with that monster just to save yourself?!"

It was my turn to yell. "Don't you dare! I care about Shane more than anyone! Don't you dare say I don't! It's just. . ." The fire leaves my voice. "He only gets hurt when I'm around. If. . . if I were gone, maybe she wouldn't bother him."

"You can't really believe that!" he argues. "If you don't go back, all you've done is made him an easy target! Is that what you want?! Is this world's pain worth that?! Are you really that selfish! ? !"

"Shut up! ! !"

"Well, are you? ! ?"

"I. . ." The words are caught in my throat. I then cradle my head. "I just want to be happy! That's all I fucking want! How is that selfish?!"

I wait for what feels like an eternity for his response. "Happiness doesn't last long in this world."

I almost laughed at his comment.

"Funny," I start. "It's pretty much the same in my world."

My eyes open, where I find myself lying on my mattress, staring into my barely lit room. The only source of light comes from what little filters through the door behind me. My mind slowly starts working, so I'm at least able to partially think clearly. Judging from the clock across my room, it's still nighttime.

I had that dream again, though it was different this time.

The dream seemed so real. It makes me wonder if the "Shinji" I was talking to was actually him. . . or just a subconscious representation of him. I think it might have been the second time I've spoken to him in my dreams. Or. . .perhaps there were more times, but I simply couldn't remember.

I roll my eyes, attempting to get those thoughts out of my head.

Unless the Shinji I was talking to was the actual Shinji, which is unlikely, then it's pointless to ponder the meaning of the dream.

Soft breathing brings me out of my head, causing me to look behind me. Lying on my mattress, wrapped up in my blankets, sound asleep, is Asuka.

An annoyed sigh escapes my lips. She must've snuck into my room. . .again. Can't have a moment to myself, can I?

A devious smile is drawn upon my lips while thinking of a way to prank the girl. That smile is wiped away when I take notice of something.

Asuka's crying.

Tears roll down her face as she mutters something in her sleep. Asuka keeps repeating these barely audible words over and over again, as if possessed. Moving closer to the girl, I'm able to make out three words.

"Don't leave me."

Her voice sounded so. . .I don't even know if the word "sad" can fully encompass her tone. The pain in her voice was just-

. . .

Moving even closer to Asuka, I gently wrap my arms around the girl.

"Don't worry," I speak in a gentle whisper. "I won't."

Eventually, I was able to go back to sleep.

Morning finally rolls around, and Asuka "ever so gently" let me know that. By "gently" I mean scaring the shit out of me! Apparently, she thought it would be funny to pounce on me while I was sleeping. I almost threw a punch at her before realizing what was going on.

She silently laughed at my confusion.

I wanted to be mad, but I couldn't help but to also laugh. Besides, there were no signs of the sadness she had harbored last night. She's just a ball of annoying energy. An admittedly cute ball of energy.

I hope to keep it that way.

After that mess, we attempted to sneak ourselves out of my room as to, you know, not get Misato's attention. As usual, that didn't work, for the woman was already awake, making breakfast. When entering the living room, Misato glances at Asuka and I, giving us both an all-knowing smirk.

Accepting defeat, Asuka and I take a seat at the dinner table, waiting for Misato to finish whatever she was making.

Moments later, Misato sets down three plates full of eggs, bacon, and waffles she had (thankfully) bought from the store. The woman then sits down at the dinner table, so we all dig into our respective meals.

It's been two weeks since Asuka and I started dating. Still not. . .used to that word, or used to the relationship I'm in now. That's not to say I don't like what's been transpiring, it's just so new to me. It's weird how affectionate Asuka can be while still retaining that "wonderful" personality of hers. One second she'll be poking fun at me, the next she'll be hanging onto me like a spider monkey. Hell, one thing that's been happening more since this relationship started was her wanting to sleep next to me. It's becoming a habit of hers, and a pretty annoying one. I mean, I prefer sleeping alone.

. . .

Still, never had the heart to tell her to stop. Maybe Asuka doing that every night. . .isn't as annoying as I made it out to be.

She's never gonna get me to admit that out loud though.

"Sooo," Misato says out of the blue. Looking at the woman, I see she's mixing some microwaved curry with ramen. It doesn't look too appetizing. "How did you two sleep?"

"We didn't do anything if that's what you're implying," I say in a blank tone.

"Awww, so boring," the "adult" says in a disappointed manner.

"Misato you pervert," Asuka speaks up, cheeks slightly red. "It's none of your business what we do at night!"

Misato now has a full on grin. "So something did happen!"

"W-What?!" The redhead's cheeks become even redder. "That's not what I-"

Misato starts laughing, and so do I, which Asuka didn't appreciate. A few seconds after calming down, I once again start speaking.

"But really, nothing happened," I state. Of course, Misato shrugs, implying she doesn't fully believe me, but whatever. "Well, since you're feeling talkative this morning, why don't you tell me when I'll be piloting again."

Misato blinks a few times. "Well, Unit-01 is still under lockdown, so it will be a while before you can undergo a sync test. Even if your Eva was available, you're still recovering, so you'll be unable to pilot until that problem's fixed."

I let out a grunt. "Great."

"Didn't think you were in such a hurry," the woman expresses.

"I'm not. It's just. . ." I pause to gather my thoughts. "I don't like all this sitting around, being useless. I mean, when the next Angel arrives, I don't want to be on the sidelines while everyone else is doing the work."

I feel Asuka playfully pinch my cheek. Glaring at her, I see she has a mocking grin.

"Don't get all worried over nothing," she proclaims. "I'm the best pilot here, so naturally the next Angel won't stand a chance."

I wave her hand off. "Quit it! And who said I was worried?"

In response she flicks my forehead. "You didn't have to say it for me to know, idiot."

I let out a scoff, but said nothing, only revealing a smirk.

"Well, I better get dressed," Asuka says while getting out of her chair. She then turns to me. "Are you going to school this time?"

I go silent for a few seconds. "Maybe tomorrow."

The girl sighs then rolls her eyes. "Just don't take too long."

Before I could respond, she leans in and gives me a quick peck on the cheek, then heads to her room.

I sat there, stunned and slightly flustered at what she just did. Without really meaning to, I reach and touch the cheek she just kissed. Don't think I'll ever get used to that.

"I see you both are happy," Misato says.

I grunt. "Shut up."

"Embarrassed?"

I grumble a few words under my breath which only serves to amuse the woman. Then a quick thought pops into my head.

"Hey, could you take me to Rei's place later on today?"

The woman shrugs. "Sure. Any particular reason?"

"Just. . .want to see an old friend."

Rei's neighborhood hasn't changed one bit. The place is still rundown and empty. Barely a soul can be seen within the area.

Haven't been here for a while, not since I had my. . .outburst with Rei. Now that the Rei that I knew was gone, I didn't really have a reason to return here. Still. . .

"Thanks Misato," I say while exiting the woman's vehicle. We just stopped in front of Rei's apartment. "This shouldn't take too long, so wait out here."

Misato nods. "Take as long as you need."

I nod back, then close the car door. Looking at all the stairs I'll need to climb to reach Rei's apartment number, causes me to let out a frustrated grunt. Though my legs have gotten stronger, I still need to use a cane. So it's gonna be a bitch to climb all those stairs.

Rolling my eyes and tapping my cane, I begin climbing those damn stairs.

While on my little journey, I can't help but wonder why I'm doing this. Why am I visiting Rei? Or rather, why am I visiting a girl who calls herself "Rei"? The person who I'm gonna see isn't the Rei I knew. She isn't the person who I became friends with. Nor. . . is she the person I hurt. This "Rei" is a clone, a ghost of the original. A complete stranger. So why? Why bother visiting the clone at all?

. . .

Maybe. . .I feel some sort of responsibility for her. When Rei was alive, I did whatever I could to help her get out of her shell. To show that she was more than just an object to be replaced. Though, looking back, my intentions were mostly selfish. I just wanted someone I could talk to who wouldn't judge me. But, in the end, Rei did end up becoming more independent, regardless of my intentions.

I guess. . .I don't know. Maybe I can help this "Rei" like I did with the previous. This clone was born to fit a specific role she didn't ask for, and probably thinks she's worthless as a result; that she's destined to be alone. I. . .I can't just abandon someone like that. What kind of person would I be if I did?

It's. . .it's what Rei would've wanted.

Reaching the front door, I give a few knocks. I wait patiently, knowing the girl on the other side will take her time. Around two minutes passes before the door opens. Behind the door stands a blue haired girl, looking at me with a blank expression. She stares at me, not offering a single word.

An uncomfortable feeling develops in my gut. I'm still not used to seeing her face.

"May I come in," I ask.

Silence.

"You may," she responds.

The girl leads me inside her home then closes the door. While inside the apartment, I drink in the strange yet familiar sight. The metal like walls. The smell of chemicals. The cold air which nibbles at my skin. It was familiar in the sense that I've been to this apartment before, obviously. Yet, it was strange in a sense that it looked almost exactly how it did all those months ago.

An abandoned prison.

The girl leads me further into the apartment, into her room, where she beckons me to take a seat. So, I decided to sit on her bed. "Rei" stands still for a few seconds, just staring at me, before sitting on her bed as well.

Silence permeates the room, only broken occasionally by the singing cicadas outside.

"Hmm," I grunt out, an attempt to conjure up something worthy of conversation. "So. . .do you get enough food?"

The girl stares at me for a while, then nods.

"Good. That's. . .good."

Silence once again overtakes the room.

Why is this so hard? Just talk to her! That's all I have to do! Why am I having a hard time doing something so simple?!

"I. . .I mean-" I look at her and can't help but feel so. . .lost. I want to attempt to fix things between us after what I said to her. After calling her a doll. After hurting her. I already apologized but that's not good enough! I want to show her that I'm trying to change! That I'm trying to get rid of that little devil which lives inside me! That I don't want to hurt her again.

Too bad she's not the person I'm looking at. The person I knew is. . .

I lower my head. "Shit."

Silence.

"Do you miss her?"

I'm stunned for a moment, surprised by the girl's sudden question.

"Do I miss who," I ask.

The blue haired girl pauses. "The previous version of myself."

"Oh." I run a hand through my hair. "That's what you meant."

I exhale slowly then nod. "Yeah. . .I miss her."

A slight smile paints my lips. "I mean, it's only natural. She was. . .one of my closest friends. She was always there to listen to what I had to say, even when what I was saying made no sense." I purse my lips. "She. . .really was the best person to be around."

Looking back at the girl sitting next to me, I see her expression change slightly. Upon noticing my gaze, she looks away, like she was ashamed.

"What was she like," she asks.

I'm puzzled. "Don't you have her memories?"

She looks to her lap. "They are not memories in the traditional sense. It is like. . .looking at her life from an outsider's perspective." She closes her eyes. "I get an impression of who she was, but not the whole picture."

"Perhaps," her eyes open. "I can better understand her, by talking to you."

I think for a moment, shifting my weight on the bed. "Well, uh. . .she liked reading, a lot." My smile returns. "She had a particular interest in poetry, though I never figured out why. Whenever I would ask why she liked poetry, she would always tell me that she was 'drawn to such literature'. Guess the reason never really mattered. I mean, you don't need to have a reason to like something. Right?"

For the next few minutes, I talked about everything I knew about the previous Rei. I spoke of how I introduced her to video games, and how she seemed to enjoy that little hobby. I spoke of how curious she was of the world once I got her to open up. And I spoke highly of the girl's intellect. She was just so damn smart. She was like a walking encyclopedia. You could ask her anything about science or literature, and she would give a correct answer without so much as blinking!

She was also a great teacher. When she was teaching me to write and read, she always found ways to break down the process into something I could understand. She was also extremely humble. She never thought highly of herself, which was a shame, because I really meant it when I told her she was the smartest person I knew.

And. . .she was kind.

Living in isolation for most of her life, being treated as nothing more than an object, you'd think she wouldn't know how to be kind. Yet, that was never the case. She never showed anger towards anyone, despite how people in the past openly mocked her. She was never social, yet she was willing to listen to whatever people had to say. And she was extremely patient with everyone. . . especially me.

. . .

I really do miss her.

I must have droned on for quite a bit. My mouth is dry from all the words dancing off my tongue, and my heart is beating slightly faster than usual. Just talking about Rei, my Rei, was enough for me to forget that time was something that existed. It was as if a dam had been opened, causing all the good memories of my late friend to spill out of me. When I finally stopped speaking, I took notice that I've been here for an hour. Despite the amount of time that passed, I noticed this Rei, the clone, staring at me, completely engrossed in my words.

I let out a chuckle. "Sorry for the rambling."

The girl shakes her head. "No need to apologize. It was. . .informative."

I let out a thoughtful hum, before realizing why Rei asked about her previous self. "You know. . .you don't have to be her."

Her eyes widened. "What?"

"You don't have to be her," I repeat. "You don't have to be a carbon copy of your previous self. You are your own person, remember? So just. . .be yourself."

She continues to stare at me before looking at her lap. "Be myself. . .I do not know what that means."

A pause.

"Then, don't think too hard about it." I state. "You'll find yourself, eventually. And, if you feel like you're still lost. . .then I'll be there to help you."

Rei continues to stare at her lap, remaining silent for a few seconds.

"I can see why you were important to her," she says in almost a whisper.

Before I can respond, she rises to her feet, looking at anything other than me. "She cared for you, more than you could ever know."

I look up at the girl, patiently waiting for her to continue. That's when I notice a single tear rolling down her face.

"All of these memories, all of these. . .emotions. They are foreign to me." Her voice breaks as she talks. "The amount of trust and love she felt for you. . .it is too much. It is. . .too painful."

I couldn't say anything.

"It hurts to be around you," she finishes which breaks my heart. "I apologize Hart. . .but I would like to be alone."

I stare at her for a long moment, then exhale through my nose.

"If that's what you want," I say while getting to my feet. As I walk toward the exit, I turn to look at the girl. "Take care of yourself."

With that being said, I exited Rei's apartment.

I hope she'll be okay.

After visiting Rei, Misato took me back home. The rest of the day pretty much flew by within the blink of an eye. Even though I didn't leave the apartment, I kept myself busy by either playing video games, watching tv, or taking care of small chores. Misato kept bothering me, saying that if I'm not going to school, then I should go out and do something fun. I pretty much ignored her whenever she brought something like that up. The only things "fun" in the city are the arcades and the movie theaters, and I don't feel like going to either. Eventually, Misato stopped bothering me when she realized I was ignoring her. Moments later, she left the apartment to both pick Asuka up from school, and to take her to Nerv.

Finally, I got some time to myself.

After a few hours of either me sitting on the couch or sleeping on it, my solitude was interrupted. Misato returned home with Asuka. Asuka, for some reason, seemed to be in a bad mood. I know this because, other than the obvious frown on the redhead's face, the girl didn't bother saying hi to me. Instead, she marched straight into the bathroom to take a shower. Giving Misato a look, she displays a sheepish smile, suggesting she's guilty of something.

The fuck did you do?

After Asuka's shower, Misato decided it would be good for all of us to watch an old movie she was saving for a "special occasion". That immediately set me on edge, though luckily she relieved my fears by displaying the movie's title. It's just some mindless action-thriller.

Fifteen minutes later, Asuka and I are sitting on the main couch while the movie's playing. Misato was somewhere in the kitchen, looking for some popcorn she swore she had bought. During that time, it became increasingly obvious that the redhead really was in a bad mood. She's completely quiet, an icy stare aimed at the tv. That's never good.

Time to bite the bullet.

"Hey." That gets the girl's attention. "Are you okay?"

She narrows her eyes at me. A second later she scoffs and points her nose in the air. "Hmph, I'm perfectly fine."

"Umm, are you sure," I press. "Cause you've been quiet since you got-"

"I said I'm fine," she responds without missing a beat.

I give her a puzzled look. Seeing as how this was probably Misato's fault, I looked to her for help. She's still looking for popcorn, so I'm on my own.

I try to come up with a reason why she's upset, but come up short. Eventually, I roll my eyes and speak again. "Can you not do the 'I'm gonna say things are fine when they really aren't' routine? It's idiotic."

The girl gives me a stern look, and for a second I thought I might've crossed a line.

"You didn't tell me you were going to Rei's place," the redhead accuses.

I blink a few times. "Okay. . .so what?"

I can see she wants to strangle me so I do a follow up question. "How'd you know about that anyway?"

Asuka crosses her arms and looks back at the tv. "Misato mentioned it when she picked me up." She glances at me. "So, why didn't you tell me that you'd be visiting Rei before I left?"

I shrug. "I didn't know I was gonna visit Rei. It just sorta popped in my head and. . ." Wait a minute. A grin plasters itself on my face. "You're jealous, aren't you?"

Her stern expression is immediately wiped away as her cheeks turn beet red. "D-Don't be ridiculous! I just want to make sure Rei doesn't try anything!"

I point a finger at her. "No, you're totally jealous!"

"I. . .you. . .you. . ." Asuka crosses her arms and looks away from me. "I don't have to explain myself!"

I start laughing. I can't help it! I just can't believe this is actually a thing that's happening!

The redhead doesn't seem to think this is as funny as I do, cause she's continuing to pout. The way she's pouting is admittedly cute, which tempted me to continue poking fun at her. But, I can't have her mad at me, so I do something I wouldn't normally do. Tentatively, I wrap my arms around Asuka's waist and bring her close to me.

"W-What are you doing," asks the redhead as her cheeks become even redder.

"Don't know what you're talking about," I tease while still feeling awkward.

She doesn't say anything, before relaxing slightly. Though I can still see she's embarrassed.

"Listen," I start. "You have nothing to worry about. I ain't going anywhere."

She scoffs. "Whatever. No need to get sappy on me."

"Well, what else am I supposed to do," I tease. "You apparently want me all to yourself."

Her reaction is immediate. She gives me the most bewildered look I've ever seen on her face, then starts hitting me. Though, there's no strength behind her "attacks".

"You jerk!" She practically shouts, cheeks still red. "I can't believe you just said that!"

"You didn't deny it," I continue teasing.

We continue our back and forth for a bit, her deep frown slowly turning into a smile. She called me a jerk a few times, which I didn't deny. I called her a tsundere, which she didn't appreciate. Soon, things calmed back down.

"I'm still mad you know," Asuka says, still pretending to be upset.

She really doesn't like "losing".

"I know," I respond. "I'll make it up to you tomorrow."

She smiles and wraps one arm around my neck. "You better."

A cough catches our attention. Turning towards the source, we spot Misato carrying a bowl of popcorn while wearing an idiotic smile.

"Do you want me to leave the room or. . .?"

Asuka and I immediately release each other, getting a chuckle out of the Major.

Tomorrow rolls around, and events played similarly to how they did yesterday. I woke up with Asuka sleeping next to me, we ate breakfast with Misato teasing us, and Asuka went to school while I stayed home. The only difference from yesterday was that I didn't go to Rei's place this time. It seemed she had much to think about, and I didn't want to intrude on that.

Another difference was that around five in the afternoon, I was taken to Nerv HQ along with Asuka. Though, unlike Asuka, I wasn't there to undergo a sync test. Instead, I'm in the hospital wing, doing my weekly physical therapy exercises. This, like most things in my life, has become a chore as of late. In my opinion, I'm pretty much fully healed. Sure, I need a cane from time to time, but it's not as hard to walk as it was in the past. Honestly, it just feels like they keep me in physical therapy to prevent me from thinking about piloting. Ever since my last fight, everyone's been adverse to the very idea of me getting back into Unit-01.

I mean, I kinda get why everyone's hesitant about me piloting again. Still doesn't stop me from being annoyed.

About an hour passes before I'm allowed to leave the hospital wing. I then spent the next fifteen minutes finding my way toward the testing area. Asuka should still be doing her sync test. Perhaps I can talk to her a bit.

Reaching the testing area, I spot Asuka just exiting her Eva's entry plug. Must've just gotten done with her test. Once she exited the testing chamber, I see she had a skip in her step. Once she takes notice of me, she immediately wants to tell me the "good news". But first, she wants me to walk with her to the locker room. As she said, she wants to get the smell of LCL out of her hair, which is fair.

While walking down the hallway, we both started talking. During this talk, I figured out why Asuka was in such a good mood. Apparently, she got a sync score significantly higher than Rei and I.

"Huh," I start. "That's neat."

"Don't act like you aren't impressed." The redhead playfully shoves me.

I let out a thoughtful hum. "You know I don't really care about these kinds of things."

She huffs in faux-irritation. "You always take the fun out of things."

"Just making sure your head doesn't get any bigger."

She puts me in a headlock, which is something I do not want. She hasn't showered yet, so she reeks to high heaven of LCL. The more I struggled against the girl, the closer she pulled me towards her, finding amusement in my discomfort.

She did eventually let me go, the stench of LCL having now rubbed off on me.

I send Asuka a glare. "Fuck you."

She pokes my nose. "Later."

I blink a few times, before chuckling. "Which one of us is the pervert again?"

She sticks her tongue out in response. I roll my eyes while smiling. She can be so childish sometimes. We both go silent for a moment, which allows a certain thought to pop into my head.

"What are you gonna do when this is all over," I ask.

Asuka gives me a puzzled look. "What do you mean?"

I elaborate. "When all the Angels are gone, there will be no reason for us to pilot. So, what are you gonna do after that?"

She goes silent.

"I've. . .never really given it much thought," she admits. She purses her lips. "I've been an Eva pilot my whole life, so it's hard to imagine doing anything else."

She shrugs. "I guess. . .I'll continue working at Nerv. Or, maybe I'll join some other branch of the military."

I raise an eyebrow. It doesn't surprise me that she wants to do military work, she was practically raised to do so. "You sure you don't want to take a break from all this?"

She nods. "Civilian life would just bore me." She laughs. "I'm not like other kids, remember? I already finished my education, so it's either sit around and do nothing, or jump right into the workforce."

Right, forgot that she went to college. With the way she acts sometimes you wouldn't know it.

"Oh, maybe I'll learn to pilot a fighter jet," she says suddenly. You can see that she thinks this is the best idea she's ever come up with.

I look at her with a half grin. "You, piloting a jet?"

"Why not," she asks while shrugging. "If I can pilot an Eva, then flying a jet shouldn't be too hard."

I shake my head while letting out a snicker. "Yeah, I can see it now. 'Asuka Langley Soryu! The greatest fighter jet pilot in the whole world at the ripe of fourteen!' Or some crap like that."

She laughs. "Yeah, laugh it up. But now I'm curious. What are you gonna do whe-"

She cuts herself off, as if she realized something. She then looks away from me, staring at the ground. I become concerned at the sudden mood shift.

"What's wrong," I ask.

She remains silent, which causes me to be even more concerned.

"Michael," she speaks. The girl starts messing with her fingers, as if nervous or ashamed of something. "I. . .I know this might be selfish of me, but-"

The sound of a siren going off cuts our conversation short. I already knew what this sound entails, so Asuka and I immediately headed toward the Command Center.

I really shouldn't be surprised. An Angel was bound to appear.

Like every time an Angel's spotted, the Command Center becomes flooded with people. As usual, people run around throwing orders at one another. Unlike most other times when an Angel is present, Gendo's here, sitting at the highest level of the Command Center. Meanwhile, Asuka, Rei, and I are standing next to Misato as we wait to see what kind of Angel we're dealing with.

Since I'm apparently still unfit to battle, as well as Unit-01 being under lockdown, I'm the only pilot not wearing a uniform. Which makes me being here pointless. I hate that this is how things are now.

"What is the Angel doing now?" Misato asks one of the technicians.

"It's just. . .staying in one place," replies one of the technicians.

Looking at the large screen at the front of the Command Center, I'm finally able to get a good look at the Angel. I'm baffled by how simple the creature looked. It's just a double-helical ring of light which is constantly spinning. It's floating near the outskirts of Tokyo-3 and, just like one of the technicians said, it's staying in one place. Like it's waiting for an Eva to show up, which in all likelihood it is.

"What do we know about it," Misato asks.

"All we know is that its field is constantly shifting," Ritsuko speaks up. "Due to this, we must assume it's capable of changing forms."

"Like the fifth Angel," I ask.

The faux-blond puts a hand to her chin. "Similar, but not the same. I doubt it is as powerful." She lets out a frustrated sigh. "But, I've been wrong before."

Misato lets out a thoughtful hum before once again speaking. "The Angel hasn't attacked yet, and we do not know what it's capable of, so here's the plan. Like with the twelfth Angel, we'll have the Evas stay hidden while slowly approaching the Angel. When the Evas are close enough to the Angel, they will remain on standby until we're sure it's safe to attack."

"What? We're just waiting?" Asuka complains.

"I will not have you all blindly charge into the unknown," Misato replies. Her expression hardens. "Not again."

The Major looks up at the upper command deck, where Gendo patiently observes the situation. "Commander Ikari, permission to send out Unit-01. A three pronged attack on the enemy might-"

"Permission denied," Gendo says without missing a beat. "Unit-01 is still. . .unpredictable. It will be kept on lockdown until further notice."

Misato scoffs. "Understood." She turns to me and the other pilots. "Asuka and Rei, head to the Eva cages and prepare for battle."

They both nod and head out of the Command Center. Despite me not going to pilot, I follow the other pilots out of the room. I may not be able to fight the Angel, but at least I can try to support Asuka and Rei.

Walking down the hall leading to the Eva cages, I quickly notice that Rei's whole body language has changed. Her shoulders are slouched and she's only looking at the ground. The pace at which she was walking is slow enough as to not catch up to Asuka, but quick enough so she could avoid me.

I quicken my pace as fast as my body would allow, and manage to place myself besides Rei. This causes her to tense slightly.

"Are you gonna be alright," I ask.

Silence fills the area. Eventually, she nods then walks quicker. But, before she could completely leave me behind, I grabbed her shoulder. She freezes.

"I. . .umm." What to say? "I know things haven't been easy. But I want you to know that I'm here if you need someone to talk to. Understand?"

Slowly, she turns to look at me. She seems. . .so sad. "Understood. . .Hart."

"Hurry up 'Wonder girl'," Asuka yells from across the hall. Looking in the direction of the redhead, I see she has stopped walking all together, giving me and Rei a glare. "We don't have all day!"

Rei nods once again, and this time runs to the Eva cages. Scratching the back of my head, I start walking. Before I can get in three steps, Asuka stops me, wearing an irritated expression.

"I don't see why you bother with her."

I give an inquisitive look. "What do you mean?"

Asuka huffs in frustration. "I told you how she acted when you were in a coma. She didn't once try to visit you. She didn't once ask about you. Hell, to her, it was like you never existed!" She points to my chest. "Yet after all that, you're still trying to talk to her! As if all of that never mattered!"

I roll my eyes. "Don't tell me you're still jelou-"

"I'm serious Michael," Asuka interrupts.

A pause.

What can I tell her? That the reason Rei hadn't visited me was because she's dead and was replaced by a clone? That I'm still talking to this clone so I can have some sense of "closure"? I don't even know if she'll believe that.

"Rei deals with things in her own way," I respond truthfully. "I'm not gonna hold anything she did or didn't do against me. I mean, what kind of friend would I be if I did?"

I decide to change the subject.

"What were you gonna ask me?"

That knocks her off balance. "What?"

"Just before the Angel appeared, you were gonna ask me something," I elaborate. "What was it?"

She goes silent. Any trace of her dominant presence had seemingly vanished. "You're changing the subject. Besides, that's. . . that's not important right now."

"Asuka," I start.

"I know," she says quickly. Someone at the end of the hallway starts yelling, saying Asuka needs to get into her Eva immediately. Letting out a sigh, she looks me in the eye. "We'll. . .we'll talk about this later."

She goes into her first stride, stops, then turns back to me. She looks pissed.

Before I could even react, the redhead grabs me, and pushes me against the wall. I'm about to question her before she grabs my face, and pulls me into a deep, passionate kiss. My eyes nearly burst out of my skull as I wonder what brought this up! This kiss lasted for a long ten seconds, before we separated, allowing me to breathe.

Breathing heavily, I give Asuka a questioning look. Still having me pressed against the wall, she gives a seductive smirk, then slowly hovers her lips over my ear.

"We'll do more if things go right," she whispers. She then lets me go, and exits the hallway.

I stand against the wall, afraid that if I attempt to walk, I'd fall over.

"What. . .What just happened?"

Once again in the Command Center, I spot Misato standing readily at her station with a look of complete focus. I decided to take a seat next to where the woman was standing, partially so I could get a better look at the large screen in front of the room. I also did this because I had some vague idea of giving the Major advice on how to defeat the Angel. . .even though I have no idea what this Angel is.

Guess I just want to feel useful.

Once the surrounding technicians finish listing off the status of both Evas, Misato gives the go ahead for launch. Looking at the large screen, I watch as Unit-00 and Unit-02 rocket towards the surface. Once there, each Eva grabs their respective weapon from an open building. Unit-00 equips itself with a pallet rifle, while Unit-02 decides to try the Sonic Axe for a second time. After choosing their weapons, Misato orders the pilots to slowly approach the Angel.

Continuing to stare at the screen, a lump develops in my throat. For as long as I've been in this world, I've fought nearly every Angel I've come across. So it feels strange to just sit here and watch while other people risk their lives. I should be out there fighting, but I'm not allowed to for some bullshit reason! All I can do is sit here, and hopefully provide some sort of insight into this situation.

. . .

I wonder if this is how Misato feels.

Minutes pass as both Evas continue their approach. Suddenly they come to a halt, having reached a suitable distance from the Angel. Each Eva is near the outskirts of the city, though each has chosen a different hiding spot. While Unit-02 hides behind some of the remaining buildings in the area, Unit-00 uses the surrounding forest to conceal itself.

"Has the Angel's behavior changed," the Major asks one of the pilots.

"No," replies Asuka. "The thing is just floating there."

"Okay," Misato breathes out. "Continue observing its behavior."

"Seriously," the redhead says in disbelief.

"That will not be possible," Rei says out of the blue. "It's coming."

Before anyone could question Rei on what she meant, the Angel stops spinning, changes its shape so it resembled a line of string, and charged at the nearest Eva. The nearest one being Unit-00!

"Rei! Move," orders the Major. But the Angel's too quick! Just as Unit-00 starts to move, the Angel penetrates its torso, pinning the machine to the ground!

Rei grunts in pain as she grabs a part of the Angel, and shoots at it. The attack does little to deter the creature.

"Dammit," Asuka grunts. Unit-02 jumps from its hiding spot and raises its axe to attack the Angel.

The Angel, upon noticing the red Eva's presence, stretches its other half toward the machine. Unit-02 manages to dodge the attack, then takes a swipe at the Angel with the axe, but the creature is able to worm its way around the machine's weapon.

Rei lets out a short yelp, which immediately draws everyone's attention.

"What's the status of Unit-00," asks the Major.

"The Angel is infecting the Eva! Bio-contamination is imminent," informs one of the technicians.

As if in response to that statement, Unit-00's armor bursts as a veiny mass starts growing around the part the Angel penetrated! The sickeningly grey mass continues to grow and writhe, giving the impression that Rei's Eva was pregnant to some demonic abomination!

Unit-00 twitches as if it had a seizure, while Rei lets out a series of painful grunts.

"Asuka!"

"I know," the redhead responds to Misato's order.

Unit-02 advances toward the Angel while still dodging its many attacks. The Angel hasn't shown any long ranged capabilities. It just launches its body toward its opponent in hopes of penetrating them. It's fast, but it's literally the only strategy it has. It's only a matter of time before-

"Gotcha," exclaims Asuka as her Eva grabs the snake-like creature. Upon contact, veins start growing on Unit-02's left arm, causing the redhead immediate pain. She pushes through the pain, raises her axe, and brings it down on the Angel, separating the creature's flesh from the rest of its body!

Blood spews out of the Angel's gaping wound as it lets out an ear splitting scream! Everyone in the Command Center, including myself, had to cover their ears to prevent their eardrums from rupturing! But, what made that scream so horrifying, was how human it sounded.

It sounded just like Rei.

"Soryu! Stop," the thing screeches in Rei's voice. "It hurts! Stop it! Please stop hurting me! ! !"

Unit-02 stands there, staring at the screaming creature. It's grip on its weapon becomes lax. Upon seeing that, I make my way to the mic sitting in front of Misato.

"Asuka! It's a trick," I scream, hoping she could hear me! "Kill it!"

Out of the Angel's wound spews out a fleshy, web-like substance, which attaches itself to Unit-02. Asuka's reaction is immediate, for she starts using her axe to attempt to get free. But the more she cuts, the more flesh grows around her. Suddenly, multiple grey masses grow from other parts of the Angel, and quickly penetrate Unit-02!

One of the technicians reports that Unit-02's suffering from bio-contamination, which gets me, as well as most of the people in the Command Center to panic. Asuka continues to fight her attacker, but several more masses grow out of Unit-02's wounds and pin it to the ground. The mass then morphs into a vaguely humanoid shape with several heads. This. . .tumor then starts making sounds similar to moaning, as if it were breathing heavily.

"What in the. . ." Asuka whispers. Her voice then changes to one of panic. "No. Stop! Get out of-"

She then lets out the most bloodcurdling scream! It was a sound a wounded animal would make, and it terrified me hearing that sound come from Asuka.

Asuka commands her Eva to once again lift its axe, but the weapon is knocked out of her Eva's hand by the humanoid tumor. The tumor then uses its fat, stubby arms, to pin both of the red Eva's arms to the ground, leaving the building-sized machine practically helpless!

The mass then starts fusing with Unit-02.

"Get out! Get out! ! ! GET OUT! ! !" Asuka yells while trying to free her Eva. "Shut up! ! !"

"Is. . .is the Angel attempting first level contact?" Ritsuko questions.

I stare in horror as the Angel continues to fuse with Unit-02, then starts its fusion with Unit-00. Unit-00 is limp, seeming to have given up completely, while Unit-02 continues struggling against the thing growing out of it. Every time Unit-02 struggled, the "growth" would let out this horrible laugh in Rei's voice.

This has to stop!

I look up at the upper command deck. "Send me out there!"

"That is not an option," replies Gendo.

"They're dying out there!"

"And you are in no condition to fight," he states. "At least they can serve as decoys until we've prepared a proper method of attack."

"You fucking ba-"

Asuka's screams cut me off. She begs, literally begs, the Angel to stop whatever it was doing! That's not something I thought I would ever hear from her. Each time she begged for the Angel to leave her alone, the thing would shiver, as if it took pleasure in her pain!

"Don't leave me," Asuka says in a whisper. It was clear she was crying. "Please. . .don't leave me alone."

My heart dropped into my stomach. What am I supposed to do? What the hell am I supposed to do!?

Before I could form another thought, a bright light enveloped the screen, followed by the sound of an explosion. When the light cleared, all I could see was smoke, a destroyed forest, and partially destroyed buildings.

Memories of the last Angel I've fought flood into me. I look back at Gendo, a scowl carved into my face.

"WHAT DID YOU DO? ! ? !"

"I ordered the JSSDF to launch several N2 missiles at the target," the man calmly replies.

My body tenses up as red fills my vision. Misato, seemingly reading my mind, grabs a hold of me, preventing me from running up to where Gendo is.

"YOU KILLED THEM! ? !" I scream with everything I have, tears rolling down my face. "YOU BASTARD! ! ! YOU-"

"The smoke is clearing," a technician reports. "We're detecting something."

All eyes are on the screen. As the smoke slowly clears, a slug like creature can be seen, slowly crawling toward the city. The thing was nothing more than a mass of arms, legs, and malformed organs of various sizes, covered completely by bulbous eyes. Attached to this. . .thing, is a completely intact Unit-00 and Unit-02.

All of us are silent, unable to process what we're seeing. It was Gendo who spoke first. "Status of both pilots."

One of the technicians, Shigeru, was the first to report. "The. . .Both of the pilots are unresponsive. Both of their umbilical cables have been severed, and their Evas no longer have power."

Gendo goes silent. Looking back at the man, I see he's speaking with Fuyustuki. I notice I'm not the only one who's staring at the commander. Almost everyone in the Command Center is waiting for Gendo's orders. After an agonizing two minutes, the man stands from his chair.

"Prepare Unit-01," he finally says.

Ritsuko gives Gendo a sharp look. "Commander, is that wise?"

"If we don't stop the Angel here, then everything is lost."

It looks as if he's going to say more when loud static echoes across the entire room. It was then everyone heard a familiar voice.

"I. . .will. . .not. . .die."

I go wide eyed. "Asuka?"

Suddenly, Unit-02 starts moving, albeit very slowly.

"I. . .cannot. . .die!" Asuka growls as her Eva's eyes emit a blue light.

"Unit-02, it's. . .it's going berserk!" Reports Maya.

Asuka lets out an animalistic cry. Unit-02, in response, lets out an inhuman scream as it tears itself out of the Angel's flesh prison! Both Asuka and Unit-02 let out another scream as they tear the Angel apart, piece by piece. In response, several tendrils grow out of the Angel and stab Unit-02. It only stops the Eva for a moment, before it grabs those tendrils, causing them to inexplicably explode!

"KYAA! ! !" The Angel screams in pain and attempts to get away from Unit-02, but its pilot won't let the creature escape so easily.

Asuka jumps onto the Angel, continuing her onslaught against the creature. Her attacks on the Angel was brutal! Angel blood flew in every direction as flesh and organs were shredded. The Angel would scream in Rei's voice, but Asuka would ignore it, continuing to destroy and maim every inch of her attacker.

Asuka lets out a final cry as she grabs the Angel's core and crushes it, killing the creature. Upon the Angel's death, Unit-00 was released from its prison, and Unit-02 shuts down. Everyone becomes silent, still processing what had happened. The only sound that could be heard was Asuka crying over the radio.

A familiar pit in my stomach develops as I continue to listen to Asuka cries, completely helpless to do anything other than stand here.

"She'll be okay."

That's what I was told when the doctors took Asuka to the hospital wing of Nerv. Of course, I wasn't allowed to see her, something about risking "contamination", which immediately negated all their attempts to placate my fears.

The image of Asuka being dragged out of Unit-02 is still freshly burned into my skull. When a bunch of hospital workers in white hazmat suits forced open the red Eva's entry plug, they were met with wails of terror. Any attempt made to grab the girl inside were met with kicking and screaming. They eventually had to resort to injecting Asuka with something to knock her out.

Seeing her unconscious, being carried on a stretcher, was like seeing a completely different person. Even while unconscious, pain was deeply sculpted onto her face.

Later on that day, I was given vague information on both Asuka and Rei, some semblance of a pep talk, then sent home with Misato. By the time Misato and I got home, it was night time. I couldn't really sleep, so I decided to just watch tv until I felt tired enough to close my eyes. Misato decided to also join in to stare at the talking box, while occasionally drinking beer. Hours later, the woman got so drunk that she got sick all over the floor, then proceeded to fall unconscious.

Today must've really gotten to her.

After cleaning up the mess, and managing to bring Misato partially back to the land of consciousness, I help her go into her room. Lying her on the bed, the woman starts mumbling apologies and random phrases. In response, I wished her a good night, then closed the door. I then head to my room.

I only ended up getting three hours of sleep.

When morning rolled around, I had to force myself to get out of bed. My body was screaming every curse it could at me to just continue lying in bed. But I reluctantly ignored the curses, pushing myself to get properly dressed. Don't know why I can't just listen to my body's demands, it's not like I've been doing anything as of late.

. . .

Whatever.

Grabbing my cane, I hobbled my tired self into the kitchen and got to cooking. For some reason I feel like making pancakes, despite how much work it would take to make such treats. A good thirty minutes pass as the smell of food fills the entire apartment. I hear a door slide open, signaling to me that Misato had just woken up.

Good thing I made enough for two.

The woman doesn't say anything, instead deciding to take a seat and lie her head at the dinner table. Moments later, I set two plates of pancakes with silverware on the table, then take a seat. Immediately, I dug into my plate. It took a few seconds, but Misato started eating her breakfast as well.

"Thanks," says the woman in between bites.

I silently nod, continuing to eat. A minute of silence passed before Misato spoke up again.

"I'm sorry about last night."

"It's no big deal," I respond. "This isn't the first time this happened, remember?"

"I know," Misato says in a tired tone. "That still doesn't make it right. *Sigh* I'm a grown woman for god's sake! You shouldn't have to deal with my drinking! Especially. . .after what happened yesterday."

We both go silent.

Taking a deep breath, I'm the first one to break the silence.

"Got any news about Asuka yet?"

She nods. "Just got a text a few minutes ago regarding her. We'll be able to take her home sometime today."

I let out a breath I didn't know I was holding, and revealed a small smile.

"That's. . .that's good to hear," I speak. "When will we be able to pick her up?"

The woman's posture seems more relaxed. "Sometime after five. The medical staff are still having her undergo some tests."

Upon hearing that, I take a look at my cellphone to see what time it is. What I see causes me to frown slightly. It's eight in the morning. "That long, huh?"

The Major nods, but looks chipper despite the subject matter. "Yes, but we'll be able to visit her three hours from now."

My slight smile returns upon hearing the news. I return to eating my breakfast.

Later on today, Misato and I arrived at Nerv's hospital wing around eleven thirty. It was a lengthy process for us to even get to see Asuka. Misato had to sign a bunch of paperwork, and we both had to be briefed on Asuka's current condition.

It was. . .slightly worrying.

While the medical staff told us there's nothing physically wrong with Asuka, she might have suffered mental trauma from. . .whatever the Angel did to her. She rarely talked to anyone around her, instead focusing her attention on anything other than people. Behavior, they said, was similar to what she displayed after encountering the fifteen Angel. Though this time around, the doctors are hoping that Misato and I will be able to get her to open up.

Hopefully, they're right.

After the briefing, the Major and I were led to Asuka's room. The room itself looked like the typical hospital room. Everything, from the floor to the ceiling, was painfully white. A decently sized tv hangs from a wall at the far end of the room, playing some show in black and white. At the other end of the room, sitting up right on her bed, is Asuka.

She's still wearing her hospital gown, and her let down hair almost conceals her entire face. She has her knees brought to her chest as she stares at the tv in the room. Though, judging from her posture, she isn't actually watching what's on tv.

"Let me know if you two need anything," says the nurse that led Misato and I here. The both of us nod in response as the nurse leaves the room.

Pausing for only a second, we both walk toward Asuka. The redhead, seeming to notice us for the first time, takes a glance at us. Misato's the first to speak upon reaching Asuka's bed.

"How are you doing?"

Asuka's silent at first. She looks down, then back to Misato. Her hair parts slightly, revealing a slight smile.

"I'm. . .fine," she says.

"You took quite a beating," Misato continues. "I'm just glad you came out okay."

The woman attempts to lay a hand on Asuka's shoulder, a comforting gesture. The redhead flinches upon Misato's touch, causing the woman to pull back. Misato becomes concerned, and I can't help but to share in that concern.

"Just. . .jumpy is all," Asuka responds, as if she could read our minds.

This time I'm the one to speak. "You can tell us if something's wrong. You know that right?"

She looks at me, then slowly grabs my hand.

"I know," she responds, once again smiling.

Misato looks between the two of us, then lets out a short laugh. "I'll leave the two of you alone. Need to discuss something with the hospital staff."

Asuka and I nod as Misato leaves the room. When the woman's gone, I look back at the redhead and frown slightly.

"You sure you aren't badly hurt?"

She nods.

I smile. "Good." I laugh a bit. "I know how stuffy it is being stuck in a hospital, so you'll be happy to know you'll be able to come home sometime today."

Her frown returns. She then looks at the bed sheets.

"Asuka?"

". . . It's just. . ." she pauses for a moment. Her grip on my hand tightens. "Will you stay with me until we get home?"

I look at her, then nod. "Of course. I'm not going anywhere."

The next few hours were spent with me at the redhead's bedside, talking to her. At first, Asuka was withdrawn, letting me take full control of the conversation, which is unlike her. As time passed, I started joking around, attempting to get her out of this rut she's in. It was a long process, but my attempts to be funny slowly cheered up the girl. Before either of us knew it, we were taking jabs at one another and arguing about stupid things, just like we used to.

We kept doing this until around five, when Misato came back. Asuka was finally able to go home with us. So after a few minutes of Asuka getting dressed (and some more paperwork for Misato), we all got into Misato's car and drove off.

I'm glad I was able to cheer Asuka up, but I know it's a temporary thing. I can tell she's still deeply affected by whatever the Angel did to her. Her not letting go of me the entire ride home is evidence of that.

I also wanted to visit Rei at the hospital today, though I really couldn't think of a reason why I should. Guess it doesn't really matter right now. I need to be here for Asuka.

Right now. . . she needs me more.

It's. . .pretty late now. When we all got home, Misato had to immediately leave for work, even though she wanted to stay home with us. This left Asuka and I alone in the apartment, where we spent most of our time watching tv or playing video games.

The redhead wouldn't talk about what happened inside Unit-02. For a matter of fact, she figured the best way to deal with what happened, was to pretend the problem didn't exist. Whenever I would attempt to get her to open up, she would either avoid giving a direct answer, or provide some sort of distraction. It was frustrating. I thought we were past the point of keeping in what was bothering us.

Though, admittedly, it's a bit hypocritical for me to be frustrated over someone else bottling up their emotions. Still, it's because I have so much experience with committing such acts that I know how unhealthy it is.

As the hours continue to pass, the cracks in her mask slowly become prominent. Whereas before she would talk about the most mundane things, probably to distract herself from her thoughts, she's now deadly quiet. Where once a forced smile painted her lips, was now replaced with a deep frown. When it turned midnight, I suggested we both go to bed.

She refused.

When I asked why, she refused to provide an answer. Instead, tightening her grip around my arm, as if afraid I would disappear into thin air. I asked her one last time what happened inside Unit-02. Her response was to stare blankly at the television screen. Accepting that this was as much as I was gonna get out of her, I go silent as well, and hope my presence will somehow magically make her feel better.

"Michael," Asuka speaks, much to my surprise. Looking at the girl, I wait for her to continue. "Do you. . .love me?"

I stare at her, completely caught off guard by her question.

"Do I. . .love you," I question, attempting to confirm that was actually what she had asked.

She answers my question with a nod. Which causes me to go into deep thought.

I don't know what love means in this context. I always hear adults saying that kids don't know what love is, at least in the romantic sense. "Puppy love" is what they call it. I guess I agree with them in a sense, I haven't lived long enough to know the difference between infatuation and "love". This is the first relationship I've ever been in, so how would I know what love is?

. . .

But. . .here is what I do know. I know that I care about Asuka. I know that I would do whatever I can to help her. And I know that right now. . .she is in pain. So. . .

"Yeah," I finally responded. "I. . .I love you."

She gives me a look I'm not quite familiar with. "Do you mean it?"

Again, I'm caught off guard. "Of course I mean it."

She lowers her head, and goes silent once again. A few more seconds pass before she speaks.

"Will you stay with me," Asuka asks, causing me to look at her oddly. She cuts me off before I could respond. "That's what I wanted to ask you. . .before the Angel attacked."

"I remember what you told me," she continues. "That the only reason you pilot is so you could return home. So. . .it makes sense that when all of this is over, that you would no longer have a reason to stay in Japan. That you will have no reason to stay with me."

For the first time, she releases me from her embrace. She gets off the couch and stands, back turned to me. "I never liked the thought of you leaving. After finally getting myself to admit how I felt, it felt wrong to know that you will eventually leave. Still, despite not liking it, I accepted it. At least. . .I thought I did." She shakes her head. "The Angel that appeared yesterday attacked my mind. . .but that's not all it did."

She rubs her arms and her body's shaking, as if caught in the middle of winter. "That thing wasn't as 'nice' as the last Angel." She lets out a humorless chuckle. "I was made to see. . .Kaji, Gendo, even my bastard of a father! They were among a sea of white faces, and every single one of them had this horrible smile. They. . .they did things to me." Her voice starts trembling. "I couldn't do anything! I was helpless, little more than a doll in their hands! And when they were done. . .they started eating me."

I wanted to say something, to somehow comfort her. But I keep quiet. Interrupting her while she was expressing her pain felt wrong somehow. So, as much as it pained me to hear her in pain, I say nothing.

"And do you know the worst part?" She finally turns to me. "I called for you. I yelled and screamed your name. . .but you weren't there!"

"You were gone," she continues. "And no matter how much I screamed, kicked, or begged. . .I couldn't change that."

She looks to the floor, looking completely exhausted. "If you really do love me. . .then stay with me. Don't leave me."

My heart just about broke when she said that. It was those words that made me nearly consider abandoning my goal of returning home. I mean, I'm happier here. I'm happier than I've ever been at home! So it shouldn't be that hard of a decision to make!

Then I'm reminded of what "Shinji" said.

I get to my feet and look at her. Judging from her expression, she knew she wasn't gonna like my answer.

"I can't."

"You can't. . .or you won't."

"I can't leave him!" I nearly shouted. I then put a hand to my face. "I. . .I can't leave my brother alone. . .not with her. It's not a choice for me. It's something I have to do. Something I need to do."

She goes silent. "And. . .I can't come with you."

I honestly don't know if it's physically possible for her to come home with me. According to Ritsuko, she has no idea why I'm still alive despite the drastic difference in physics between my world and this one. The best we both could conclude is that I'm alive due to a freak accident. Asuka could probably die if she goes into my world, but equally, there's a chance she could live. The best I can do is guess, and I'm not willing to bet Asuka's life on a guess.

"It's. . .complicated." That's the best I could offer her.

She stares at me for a good minute, then closes the distance between us. She wraps her arms around my neck, and stares into my eyes. There's nothing in her eyes, as if they've completely glazed over.

"Are you sure, there's nothing I could do to convince you to stay," she says in what I assumed was supposed to be a seductive tone. Instead, it sounded as if she's about to cry. She then reaches to the collar of her shirt, and slowly pulls it down, revealing some cleavage.

I grab her hand. "Asuka, stop."

"Please." Tears rolled down her face.

"This. . .won't make me stay."

We both don't say anything for a long while. I then grab her shoulders, and attempt to look strong.

"Listen," I start. "I may not be here forever. But I promise, with everything I am, that I will make the most of my time here with you. I'll spend all the time I have left to make you happy. I swear."

I could've lied. I could've told her that I will be here forever. But that will be giving her false hope. I don't want to do that. She deserves better than that.

She doesn't say anything, instead leaning into my chest, allowing her tears to flow. We stay as we are for a few minutes before deciding to fall asleep on the couch.

I hope I did the right thing.

Opening my eyes, I'm greeted with the sun's annoying light. Turning to my left, I see the light coming from the window. Morning has already arrived. Wonder how many hours of sleep I got this time?

Looking to my right, I see Asuka is asleep, still clinging to my arm. Slowly and carefully, I manage to get myself out of her embrace. As soon as I was free, I stretched, then walked into the kitchen. Reaching the fridge, I notice just how tired I am. My eyes can't seem to focus on anything, and my limbs move around lazily, as if I have no bones.

Guess my lack of sleep was gonna catch up to me sooner or later.

Despite my fatigue, I was able to make a simple breakfast, bacon and eggs. I have no idea if Misato sneaked home or not, so I made just enough for Asuka and I. I set the breakfast on the dinner table, then walked over to the couch Asuka's sleeping on. Gently waking up the girl, I convince her to eat her breakfast. The girl slowly makes her way to the table, picks up a fork, and slowly eats the food I made for her. She's still wearing that somber expression, but is attempting to hide it with a smile. I let out a sigh while thinking of a way to cheer her up.

. . .

Well. . .there is one thing I can do, though I've been putting it off for a while.

"Thinking of going to school today," I say while eating.

Glancing at the girl, I see her give me an odd look.

"Are you sure," she asks. "You don't have to if you don't want to."

I wave off her concern. "You and I both know I've been stuck in this place for long enough. I can't do much without my cane, I can't pilot an Eva, and I can't even do a simple harmonics test. Might as well do the one thing I can do, which is going to school."

"Besides," I continue, displaying a slight smile. "It'd be a good way to keep you company."

The girl frowns slightly, then reveals a genuine smile. "Yeah. . .I'd like that."

I let out a hum of acknowledgement, then go back to eating.

As it turns out, Misato did sneak back into the apartment while Asuka and I were asleep. When she heard that I wanted to go to school, she was just happy that I decided not to hang around the apartment all day. Misato quickly drove me and Asuka to school, where I internally groaned at all the missed work I'm probably gonna have to do.

I'm probably gonna fail this semester.

Whatever I was expecting to see at school was shot down upon arriving in the homeroom class. There were even less students than the last time I was here. Then again, I really shouldn't be surprised at the lack of students after the last few Angel attacks.

The mood of the entire class was also different. I hesitate to call the mood somber, but it wasn't the "not a care in the world" attitude I was used to seeing in the students. That's what was bothering me. Whenever something happened to the city, no matter how bleak, my classmates always acted like nothing happened. Now, they just seem done with it all.

Anyway, the rest of the day went by smoothly. Though, the teachers called me out on missing a ton of work. And it wasn't just me missing the work this week, but the other weeks before, exempting my time being in a coma. They made it clear that if I were a normal student, they would've dropped me from school. In other words, this is my last time to actually try to pass my classes, else I'll fail and repeat a grade.

School is the last thing I'm worried about at the moment. But, it's something to keep in mind.

During one of the many class breaks, I made an effort to speak with Asuka and even some of the students in class. The students somehow knew Asuka and I were dating. Though, it's more likely Asuka subtly hinted at it while I wasn't at school. Some of the students were nosy about our relationship, which was gross, but most of them seemed apathetic.

When the break ended, Hikari got everyone to stand, greet the current teacher, then take a seat. It was at that moment I realized Rei wasn't in class. Perhaps she's still in the hospital.

When the school day ends, Asuka prepares to call Misato to drive us home. But I have other ideas. I sent a quick text to the Major, telling her we'll be home late, and had Asuka and I take a train to the arcade. When there, I spent most of the time trying to cheer Asuka up, despite her being adamant she was fine.

The longer we stayed there, the more I was able to break through her mask and convince her to enjoy herself. We spent maybe an hour at the arcade before deciding to leave to explore the city.

We didn't do much in the city, just looked at some buildings and talked to one another. I do everything I can to make sure the girl is happy, to make sure she knows that I won't be going anywhere anytime soon. After what she told me last night, she just needs to know how much I care for her.

I . . . I just want her to know that.

We come to a stop near a docking area and decide to take a seat there. It's night out, so we see what little starlight bounce off the still lake in front of us. We sit next to each other, just staring at the lake and the occasional boats in the area.

"So, how do you like our little trip," I ask.

She scoffs. "It's great. Nothing says 'romance' like the smell of dead fish."

I laugh. "Nice to see you got your snark back."

She snorts out a laugh, then frowns. "I will miss you."

I look at her, as if asking her to continue.

"I still don't know why I can't come with you." She inhales deeply, then exhales. "And, I don't know why it would even be complicated to do so. Still. . .I do know that I will hate not having you around." She plays with her hair while letting out a short laugh. "I. . .have a lot of things I regret. One of them was me not realizing how I felt about you earlier."

She lays her hand on my shoulder. "If I wasn't so stubborn. . .maybe I would have had more time to spend with you."

I purse my lips, then grab Asuka's hand. "Don't worry. . .I'll still be here for a while."

"For however long 'a while' may be," she replied, bitterness evident in her tone.

I frowned, then delicately grabbed Asuka's chin so she could look at me. "I'll come back. When I leave, and take care of things at home, I'll come back here. I promise."

I don't know if it'll be a one way trip. Even if it is, I'll still find a way back here. I have too.

Asuka's smile returns, though it feels forced. "I know."

We stay at that dock for a bit longer until I suggest we go back home. When we got back to the apartment, we fell asleep in my room.

For the past three days, Asuka's been silent. Whenever I did get her to talk, she would only speak in short sentences. Anytime she looked at me, she would display this sad smile, like she was witnessing a funeral. She's also been getting sick, and the sickness has been getting worst as time passed by. It started out as a small cough, and eventually morphed into her having trouble breathing every once in a while. Misato took Asuka to see a few doctors to see what was wrong. According to them, there's nothing physically wrong with the redhead.

Yesterday, Asuka went to live with Hikari. Asuka assured me this was a temporary thing, that it was nothing for me to worry about. That, of course, made me panic. I kept asking her if she was mad at me, which she vehemently denied. All she said was that she needs to be away from me, to figure things out. When she saw the concern didn't leave my eyes, she shook her head, smiled and said "Everything will be okay".

When the door closed behind her, I couldn't help but think I'd made a terrible mistake.

Right now, I'm back at school attending first period class. After the teacher was done with a part of his lesson, the class went on break. As usual, Hikari set the standard of how everyone should behave. Though, her job was made significantly easier due to the lack of students in class. Speaking of lack of students, I realized that two people were missing.

One was Rei, though she hasn't been in school since the last Angel attack. The other student is who I'm significantly more worried about.

Asuka.

When Hikari was done lecturing the class I decided now was the best time to talk to her. I get out of my seat and walk up to the brunette.

"Hey," I greet the girl.

She notices my presence and does a slight nod. "It's nice to see you're doing better. Do you need something?"

I nod. "Yeah. Um, can we talk in the hall?"

She answers my question with a nod, then leads me to the hallway, closing the classroom door behind us. When outside, she gives me a worried expression. "It's about Asuka, isn't it?"

I sigh. "Yeah. . .how is she?"

"She's," a pause. "Been having a hard time. When she came into my home, she. . .couldn't stop crying. I kept asking what was wrong, but she wouldn't tell me."

Hikari rubs her left arm. "She's. . .also gotten really sick. She couldn't even get out of bed, which is why she's not at school. At this rate, she might need to see a doctor." She looks at me. "What happened to her?"

I close my eyes and inhale deeply. "It was the last Angel. It. . .did something to her." I let out a shaky exhale. It doesn't seem right to talk about this without Asuka here. But Hikari's Asuka's friend, so it should be okay for her to hear this. "The thing messed with her mind. She told me it happened before but. . .it's different this time."

There was a long pause between the both of us before Hikari spoke again.

"Tomorrow, I'm gonna convince Asuka to return home. As much as I care for her. . .she can't stay." She sighs. "The school will be closing within the week, and. . .my family will be moving."

My eyes widen. "You're moving?"

She nods. "My father is just tired of worrying about the next attack. So, he wants us to move out of the city. I was against it. Asuka's my best friend, I can't leave her here. Especially with how she is now. But, I don't have a choice."

I grow silent. "Does Asuka know?"

"I didn't tell her," she responds. "But I wouldn't be surprised if she had figured it out."

The only friend Asuka made in this city is going to move away. Why is this happening?

"Michael," Hikari says, bringing me back to reality. "Please take care of her. She's gonna need you now more than ever."

I purse my lips. "I'll do what I can."

She crosses her arms. "I guess that's the best we can ask of anyone." She turns her back to me. "Today might be the last time we get to speak to each other, so. . . I guess it's goodbye. We didn't know each other very well but. . .I am glad to have had you as a classmate."

And with that, she walked back into the classroom. Meanwhile, I continue standing in the hallway, remaining completely silent.

When school ends, I return home to finish the literal mountains of work I need to do in order to pass. A few hours go by before I hear the kitchen phone ring. Misato's the one who answers it. After a few seconds of speaking, Misato goes pale. Misato immediately hung up and called someone else. When I asked what was wrong, she was hesitant to tell me, but only for a second.

She got a call from Hikari. Asuka's missing.

I didn't think. I left my cane behind and ran out of the apartment. I had a general idea of where Hikari's apartment was, so all I had to do was look for Asuka in the surrounding area. She couldn't have gotten far, she was sick when I last saw her.

I ran until my legs felt like they were on fire, and kept running when they became numb. No matter where I checked, I couldn't find the redhead. All I could think about was why she ran? Why did she decide to disappear?

That's when all the pieces fall into place, revealing how much of an idiot I was!

I saw she was hurting! I saw she was in pain! She was practically begging me to tell her something that would comfort her! Something that would confirm that I still cared for her! And what did I do?!

I told her the truth.

I told her that I was willing to choose going home over her. I told this girl, who's mind was violated by an Angel twice, that she wasn't as important as my stupid goal! Instead of assuring that I'll always be there for her, I just confirmed her fears.

How fucked is that?! How did I think that was okay?!

I use my cellphone to call Asuka, hoping she still has her phone on her person. Every time I call, I'm directed to voicemail, which was almost enough for me to smash the phone against a wall!

That's when my thought process changed. If she's like me, she's gonna want to be some place devoid of people. Some place to be alone. So instead of checking the areas she was last seen, I checked areas I would go to if I wanted to be alone.

Thirty minutes of running and a train ride later, I arrive at my destination. It was the same neighborhood Rei lives in. Wasting no time, I start searching the area, which reveals that most of these apartments actually were empty. Still, there were too many places to search, at this rate I won't be able to find her.

Sending a quick text to Misato so she knows where I am, I call Asuka's cellphone one last time. I then hear some faint ringing not coming from my own phone. I follow that noise until I'm inside one of the apartments. The place is rundown, and is practically falling apart, but that's where the ringing is the loudest. Searching each room, I finally found who I was looking for.

She's sitting upright on a bed, staring at nothing other than the bed sheets. Her hair is no longer in twin tails, so it cascades down her face. She wears a yellow shirt which loosely clings to her body, and is hunched over.

I immediately ran to the girl. The closer I get, the worse she looks.

I grab the girl. . .she's cold to the touch!

"Asuka!" I scream, shaking her slightly, trying to wake her up.

Her eyes slowly open. At first, she has a blank expression before recognition dawns on her.

"Michael." Her voice is so frail.

"Thank God, you're alive," I say, tears rolling down my face. In the distance, I can hear helicopters and sirens heading in this direction. "Everything's gonna be alright, okay? We're getting you to a hospital, so stay with me."

"I. . .I. . ." the girl tries to speak, but she starts coughing up a storm. She continues to cough until the sounds of wheezing fills the air. I start to panic!

"It's all gonna be okay," I repeat, probably trying to convince myself more than her. "When this is all over, I promise you I'm not going anywhere! I promise I'll stay here forever! Just ho-"

Her hand delicately lands on my left cheek, cutting me off. Tears roll down her face as she gives a genuine smile.

She stops breathing.

The only sounds that can be heard were the helicopters hovering in the sky, and the sirens of emergency vehicles approaching.

Author's Notes: This year's really been kicking my ass. Been wanting to write this chapter for a while, but things kept getting in the way. It was really annoying. Thankfully, I was finally able to get this chapter done, despite the setbacks. To be honest, I didn't think I would be writing this much, though I guess the long chapter should hold y'all over until the next chapter is released. Also, before I forget, Codjumper got the name of the band in the last chapter correct. Good on you.

Chapter 22: This is not really a band but an artist; the music he made was for an anime which seemed to be inspired by 'The Thing' (you can just guess the name of the anime if you can't think of the artist). As for the name of the song, it's alluded to in the chapter's title; if you can figure out the anime the song came from, you can figure out the song's name.

Happy Thanksgiving to those who celebrate it, and see ya'll in the next chapter.