The day of the memorial was a bright and sunny one. Jack, Rose, Fabrizio, Tommy, and Lily were dressed in their Sunday best as they entered the empty church. They looked around, with tears in their eyes as they spied the flower arrangement that Rose had ordered on the platform, right behind where the preacher usually stood. They were a mixture of red and white roses and a banner hung over them stating remembering friends and family.
"This is beautiful," Jack felt tears in his eyes, remembering the Cartmell family and little Cora. He held a little doll and walked up to the podium and sat the toy there in honor of the now-deceased family. He didn't know what good it would do to leave the toy for a dead little girl, but it felt like the right thing to do.
Rose held a small notepad in her hand and remembered at the first class dinner, how she had acknowledged the little notepad that Thomas Andrews always had with him, taking small notes on what could be improved on the ship and what could be added to make the ship even more perfect. Titanic had been his baby and she'll never forget the last time she had seen him and pure heartbreak in his eyes. She walked up and sat the notepad next to the doll, honoring the builder of the ship.
"This is for Thomas Andrews who had loved his ship and who treated me like a person, not an ornament on Cal's arm. He was the first person that noticed the real me and he helped me find Jack that awful night the ship sank. He was such a good man and it was heartbreaking to see his dream die," She looked at Tommy and smiled. "He was an Irishman, by the way. I thought that you might like to know that."
Jack chuckled. "Tommy, you did say that the ship was Irish. There you go. But he was a good man. He never looked down on me."
Tommy cleared his throat and walked up to the podium and sat a cigar down beside the notebook. "In honor of all the mates that didn't make it that awful night. They were like me and Fabri. Full of hopes and dreams that will now never come true. May their souls rest in peace."
Finally, it was Fabrizio, who held a simple violet in his hand and placed it next to the cigar. "Helga's favorite flower. May she rest in peace wherever she may be."
Rose then took a ribbon that was wrapped around a locke of red curls and placed it next to the flower. "This represents Lily's parents, who left their little girl too soon. I know that they lead me to her and are watching over us now. I thank them for their perfect gift in Lily and promise to love her and take care of her as if she was my own. May they rest in peace," Rose placed the ribbon-wrapped hair next to the cigar.
Jack looked at the items they had brought and then turned to his friends. "Perhaps we should share some memories of those we have lost?"
"Good idea, boy-o. I think I'd like that. Maybe our thoughts and memories will reach them, wherever they are," Tommy nodded, liking the idea.
"Ok, let's take a seat, and then I'll go up first," Jack took Rose's hand and gently kissed the back of it, knowing that this was not at all easy for her, but it needed to be done. They all needed to put Titanic to rest, one way or another.
They all sat in the front row pews. It felt weird because the church was usually filled to the brim with people, but now it was empty with just the five of them attending this memorial.
Jack again gave Rose a lingering kiss before making his way to the podium and standing behind the small offerings on the podium. He looked at his friends...no his family and felt such a camaraderie with them. He knew that no matter what, they were bonded. The sinking had connected them in a way that could never be broken and to be honest, he wouldn't have it any other way.
"Fabri and I were never meant to be on Titanic. We didn't buy the tickets. We hadn't even planned to sail back home on the vessel. But we had...because of a lucky hand at poker. That had thrown us into the biggest adventure of our lives. But it had also put me in the path of the Cartmell family. Bert, his wife Mae, and their daughter Cora.
I got to know them on the first day of the voyage. We all were just settling in and little Cora had gotten herself lost down in steerage and I spotted her standing in the general area, looking lost. So I approached her and helped her find her way back to her parents. When we found them, it was such a lovely reunion, I had to sit down and draw them and gifted them the sketch I had made. Ever since Cora had been one of my favorite subjects...but now all of her drawings are at the bottom of the ocean...and when I think of how scared she must have been...and the life she'll never live…," Jack's voice cracked and his hand flew to his mouth as tears filled his eyes.
Rose got up right away and went to her husband and wrapped comforting arms around him. "I know, Jack. I know…" She too had been haunted by thoughts of what had happened to the little girl that Jack had called his best girl. She remembered the little boy that they had tried to rescue and often wondered if little Cora had met the same fate.
Tommy and Fabrizio, with Lily in their arms, went and joined Jack and Rose in a group hug, all of them mourning the small family and the little girl that had died too soon.
After a few minutes, Jack pulled away, wiping the tears from his eyes. "Um...I'm sorry about that...it's been a while since I allowed myself to think about Cora for an extended amount of time…"
"It's alright, boy-o. We think about her too," Tommy smiled, his own eyes full of unshed tears. "We all loved her. Even your goddess."
"I didn't even know her, I just remember her as my competition for Jack's best girl. I think she won, though," Rose chuckled.
"You both were my best girls. And that includes, our little princess here," Jack chuckled, kissing Rose and running a finger through Lily's ginger curls.
"I suppose it's my turn now," Rose sighed, taking a deep breath. She waited until everyone else had returned to their seats and then collected her thoughts, thinking about all she wanted to say about the man that had designed the ship of dreams.
She closed her eyes, remembering Thomas Andrew's amused smile as she told off Bruce Ismay. How he seemed to be impressed with her when she calculated that there were not enough lifeboats for everyone onboard. The grief in his eyes when he realized that his ship was doomed. His willingness to help her help Jack. His final goodbye to her as he gave her his life jacket. Thomas Andrews had been a good man who had not deserved to have his dreams rammed into a solid wall of ice. Titanic should have had many more voyages to sail, being updated constantly by the creator that loved her. It just wasn't fair!
"Thomas Andrews loved his ship. He would carry around that notepad, just writing down ways to make the ship better. He tried so hard to make it comfortable for everyone, despite being voted down. You don't know this, but he had wanted to add more lifeboats on the ship, but he had been outvoted on that. They thought the deck would look cluttered. He tried to make it a safe ship, but it was the greed and arrogance of others that had killed his dream. But the creation of Titanic was not what made Thomas Andrews a great man to me. He was one of the few people that treated me like a real person. He didn't treat me like I was dumb and he was always honest with me. And he helped me. When Jack was stuck below decks in the master of arms office, it was Thomas Andrews who told me how to find him. I saw him give a maid a life jacket and told her to get on a lifeboat. He was kind and compassionate. He was a true gentleman."
Rose returned to her seat on shaking legs. She knew that Thomas Andrews probably had an even bigger memorial and more loved ones to remember him back where he had lived, but she felt good sharing her impressions of him. Hopefully, he was at peace now.
"I guess I'm up next," Tommy got to his feet, taking off his bowler hat and holding it in his hands as he took Rose's place on the platform. "I must say, in my time in steerage, I met plenty of immigrants, such as myself. Each one had a dream of America. An ambition. To be something better that they couldn't be in the place where they came from. Take Kate Alderson. An English lass that wanted to be a lady's maid. Then there was John O'Malley. He wanted to be a constable. Not big dreams, I know...but dreams nonetheless, dreams that would have given them and their families a better life. Then there was Sven Gundersen. He was a Swede. Cousin of the blokes that boy-o and Fabri won their tickets from. He had wanted to be a pub owner...as did I. We had talked about finding a place together and having our own pub. Of course, that didn't happen. The sinking snuffed out all of those dreams. Now all I can do is remember them and live for them. Dedicate all of my accomplishments to them. My fellow immigrants, may you rest in peace and everything I do, it is in your honor."
More tears fell from Rose's eyes as Tommy stepped down. Her heart seemed to ache endlessly for the people that had perished that horrible night. She looked at Jack, who held her hand in his. Their eyes met and she saw the same grief that was in her heart, in his eyes. It must be worse for him. These were people he had known, people he had lost.
Fabrizio was next. He stood where Tommy had and stared in the distance, his grief clear in his posture. He still missed Helga terribly. That was always going to be a known fact, but he had to move on somehow. He had to lay her to rest if he was ever going to be happy again. If only saying goodbye wasn't so hard.
"Helga was beautiful and sweet. Interesting. Challenging. We didn't speak the same language, she was no good at English...but somehow...we managed. We communicated through our souls. Our body language. Our spirits. Somehow, we always understood each other. I had only known her for a few days...but it felt like a lifetime. It's not fair that she is not here now, but I am. It is not fair that she never got to experience America and make her dream come true. We should be here together...but we're not. I do know one thing...I shall never forget her. No matter where I go, what I do, or who I am with. Helga Dahl will always be a part of my heart. May she and her family rest in peace and we meet again in another life."
Fabrizio stood up there for a few minutes, his eyes still staring off into the distance, his spirit bidding goodbye to the one he had loved. He closed his eyes as he felt something warm and sweet brush against his ear, almost feather-like, and then it was gone. When he opened his eyes, he felt...better. Like a weight had been lifted from his shoulders.
"Goodbye, Helga," He mumbled, almost so low that he could barely be heard. Slowly, he stepped off the podium and took his seat.
Rose and Jack got up and each took one of Lily's hands as they lead her up to the platform. They faced Tommy and Fabrizio, who looked grim, but encouraging.
"I think I met Lily's mother. When Jack and I were below in steerage...looking for a way back up to the top decks, a lady with Lily's red hair wrapped a blanket around my shoulders to keep me warm. Her husband gave Jack a flask to drink from, saying the whiskey would warm him up some. They were kind and generous, despite the danger, and now when I look at Lily...I see traces of them," Rose stated, remembering the rushed moment.
"I'll always believe that they had led Rose to Lily, knowing that she'd take care of her...and that they lead them back to me, knowing that we'd give their baby girl the loving family she deserves and I want to promise them that we will. We will raise Lily as our daughter and love her as our own. Tommy will teach her about Ireland. Fabrizio will teach her about friendship and loyalty. She will never want for anything. I hope that Lily's parents have found peace, wherever they are," Jack lifted Lily up into his arms. "I promise, your baby girl will always be loved and well taken care of."
"She's already our little princess," Rose tearfully smiled. "I wish I could thank them for leading me to her. She kept me from totally falling apart after Titanic. I will love her forever."
"That is a promise that both Fabri and I will make as well," Tommy and Fabrizio approached the small family. "Her ma and pa can rest easy now. We will love and protect her. They have no need to worry."
"Do you have anything to say, Lily Pad?" Jack asked.
"Goodbye, Mama and Papa. I love you," was all the little girl could manage before hiding her face against Jack's neck.
"Now what do we do?" Fabrizio asked, wondering if this was all that was to be done.
"We place these tokens in a box...and the undertaker will bury them in a plot that I had purchased. Jack and I are going to get some money together to get a headstone, marking it as a memorial for the Titanic victims...and have their names inscribed on the headstone," Rose explained.
"It'll be a place where we can visit and remember every year if we want," Jack chimed in, feeling good about the arrangements.
"I like that," Fabrizio nodded his approval, his brown eyes lighting up with a happiness that he hadn't felt in a long time. "We move on...but we remember. Helga will not be forgotten."
Jack nodded, happy and proud of his friend. He could see Fabrizio's wounds beginning to heal now. "That's right Fabri. They are gone, we have moved on, but they will never be forgotten."
(A/N: This chapter is dedicated to the Titanic victims. Another anniversary had just passed. The next chapter will be the arrival of Cal!)