Beware of some nsfw scenes. And dubious consent (if it gets a little too triggering, feel free to fast forward to the scene break indicated by the three dots(...))

Previously, Naruto was trying to do better with his family but was hella confused at the same time.

a daughter's wish

Out of the corner of his eyes, Sasuke had been watching Naruto and Himawari. Perched on his back, Himawari was saying something that made Naruto laugh.

When was the last time Sasuke had seen him laugh like that?

Naruto and his family seem to be on much better terms these days. Sasuke could tell from the way Boruto looked so much happier these days. The kid took to his training sessions with an enthusiasm Sasuke had never seen in him before.

Smiling, he turned his attention back to Sakura, who seemed to almost glow with happiness. He noticed how much effort she put into her appearance when she really didn't have to. She still looked pretty. She looked her best when she was at the hospital, focused on her patients and her research.

Seeing Boruto happy had made Sasuke want to see that same light in Sarada's eyes, so he'd asked her what he could do to make things better for her.

To his surprise, Sarada had wanted him to take Sakura out on a date. Unsure if Sarada understood what a date meant, he had reminded her that she wouldn't be able to join them on the date. Sarada had looked at him as if he'd lost his mind.

"Uh, of course I wouldn't want to join you," she'd said, shuddering. "Ew."

Sasuke had had training with Boruto later that evening, and he'd asked him what he thought of Sarada's request. They were teammates, after all, so maybe Boruto would know why Sarada would make that sort of request when it had nothing to do with her, and Sasuke wouldn't look like an idiot in front of his daughter.

Unfortunately, he ended up looking like an idiot in front of his student. He wasn't sure which was worse.

"Uh…cos it's nice to see that your parents get along well?" Boruto had said, looking at Sasuke as if he was seeing him for the first time.

Sasuke didn't know why he thought Boruto—Naruto's kid—of all people would have a good answer and left it at that before he could lose any more respect.

But then, Boruto'd muttered, "I wish Dad would take Mom out on a date sometimes."

Sasuke hadn't realized just how much children cared about their parents' dating life.

A lot, apparently.

"Why is that?" Sasuke had asked.

Boruto had shrugged. "I dunno. I guess it'd just make my family feel more like a family. And I like seeing Mom happy."

So, Sasuke decided it wouldn't hurt to try.

Sakura almost teared up. And Sasuke cringed as he realized just how much he'd neglected his own family.

So, here he was with her, enjoying a lovely dinner outdoors.

A peel of laughter caught both their attention, and he looked once again in Naruto's direction just as he jumped up to the roofs, Himawari giggling and stretching her arms out as if she was trying to fly.

Sasuke couldn't help but smile.

"She's just like him, isn't she?" Sakura commented. "I'm glad things seem to be getting better for them."

"Mm."

They ate the rest of their dinner in companionable silence. When they finished, Sakura's eyes glinted. "How about we start heading home? Sarada's sleeping over at Cho-cho's tonight."

Sasuke wondered why Sakura looked so excited about Sarada hanging out with a friend.

"Oh, Sasuke-kun." Sakura winked. "We'll have the whole house to ourselves tonight."

Ah.

Sasuke's mouth went dry. He quickly caught himself and said, "I was hoping…we could take a short walk, first? The weather is still nice."

"Oh. Y-Yeah—um—sure! The weather really is nice! Let's go."

Her disappointment was painfully obvious, as much as she might have tried to hide it.

Sasuke took her hand, squeezing it. "It's just a short walk. We'll get home soon. I just wanted some more fresh air."

Sakura leaned into him. "Of course, Sasuke-kun," she murmured. "I like taking walks with you."

Sakura had given him so much. She'd given him a home, a family. Raised their daughter all on her own. She'd gone through so much for him, and even after all these years, she still had the same devotion toward him.

Even though he never deserved it.

It was only fair he should give back. For everything he'd put her through, he owed her that much. He hadn't been intimate with her in so long.

So, when they got home and closed the bedroom door behind them, he kissed her.

She was pretty, she really was. Motherhood had only made her exceptionally more beautiful. He loved the way her face would light up every time she was with his daughter.

She was glowing even more now as she looked at him with so much love. It intimidated him. She kissed him, slipping her tongue into his mouth, and he took her lead, trying to give her as much as she was giving him. She cupped his face, bringing him in deeper. Her kisses soon took on a sense of desperation, and she pressed herself against him, grinding on him.

Sasuke couldn't blame her. He couldn't even remember the last time they kissed.

Why was she still with him?

Sakura let go of his lips, breathless, a little pink in the face. Her eyes were adoring.

At least he was able to make her happy this way.

But a part of him wondered how such a powerful woman could be satisfied with so little. He wondered what she saw in him. He could hardly give her a tenth of what she gave him.

Sakura moved to remove her dress. Soon, she stood before him in her underwear, smiling shyly as she took small steps backward, toward the bed.

Swallowing, Sasuke moved forward, taking his time unbuttoning his shirt. At the edge of the bed, Sakura took him by the lips again, removing his shirt for him. She reached to unbutton his pants.

Sasuke tried to ignore the knot in his stomach. She needed this. She was his wife for fuck's sake. It was the least he could do for her.

Removing his pants, she led him to bed. Started stroking him.

Sasuke closed his eyes, idly wondering if Naruto was doing the same with Hinata. On their walk, they'd seen Naruto and Hinata, having dinner, clearly on a date themselves. They were probably at home by now, and Naruto, despite his state of constant sleep deprivation, would still have energy left. He could just imagine the dobe in bed, enthusiastic and—

No.

He snapped his eyes open and stopped Sakura's hand. He kissed her to avoid her questioning glance.

It was simply a physical thing. And, physically speaking, it wasn't as if he didn't enjoy it. He also liked that he was able to pleasure her. So, he didn't mind doing it for her.

What would help, though, was if the idiot could keep from butting into his mind.

Sasuke fiddled with her bra strap, but with one hand and not much practice, it made things a little difficult. Sakura chuckled and helped him out, revealing her small mounds of flesh. He played with them, squeezing her nipples, satisfied when she let out small moans, before moving down to her panties, removing them, and fingering her the way Sasuke remembered she used to like.

She climaxed easily, her face flushed and sweaty as she tried to get her breath back. She cupped his cheek, smiling. "Sasuke-kun."

Sasuke kissed her, pleased he was able to do something right.

Sakura kissed back, her hand roaming his chest and abs. Slowly, her hand went further down.

It was just a physical thing.

Sakura started pumping his length and swallowed his gasps in another deep kiss.

Once again, his mind wandered unwillingly to those wide blue eyes. The way his whiskered cheeks had reddened the other day when Sasuke had unintentionally closed in on him. It didn't mean anything, Naruto had just been caught off guard, but Sasuke still liked that it was him who made him blush—

This was wrong.

This wasn't fair for her.

When Sakura let go of him for air, she pushed him on his back and crawled down to his member.

"Sakura—ngh!"

She engulfed him in her warm mouth.

No.

"S-Sakura—wait."

She finally let go. "Yeah?"

Sasuke opened his mouth, but the words died in his throat at the sight of her bright, shining face.

"Sasuke-kun?"

"You…don't have to," he said, eventually.

Sakura smiled. "You're always focusing on me. Let me do this for you."

Sasuke swallowed and attempted a smile of his own. "As…long as you're okay with it."

Gazing at him with a sly look in her eyes, she took him again, sucking him.

Sasuke shuddered and closed his eyes as his head became hazy. It took all of him to not think about blonde hair and whiskered cheeks and blue, blue eyes.

If only he could trail his fingers through those soft-looking yellow strands, just once—

No.

Sasuke finally remembered why he hadn't touched Sakura in so long.

"Sakura—"

He couldn't do this.

"Sakura—hold on—"

Sakura misunderstood and kept at it. "S-Sakura—" Sasuke somehow managed to slip out from underneath her. "E-Enough!" he gasped.

...

It wasn't fair for her. It was fair for Naruto. And if Naruto knew—

He shouldn't know. Nor should anyone else. Least of all, Sakura. And if in his moment of climax, he accidentally whispered his name—everything would be over.

"Sasuke-kun?" Sakura crawled up to him, her eyes wide. "Oh my god—I'm so sorry—a-are you alright?"

"I—" He didn't know what to say.

Sakura cupped his cheeks, making him focus on her. "Hey, what's wrong?"

Sasuke let out a shaky breath. "N-Nothing. I'm just—can we—stop?"

"Of course." She kissed his forehead. "Of course. I'm sorry."

"No, it's my fault. I'm sorry."

"It's okay, Sasuke-kun. I should be the one who's sorry. I'm so sorry!"

Sasuke couldn't bear to look at her. "No, I'm…sorry. Maybe…another time."

Pathetic.

"It's fine, Sasuke-kun." Sakura brushed his bangs back, looking into both his eyes, giving him no choice but to look back. "It's not something you should apologize for. It's me. I should have been paying more attention." She hugged him, gently scratching the back of his head as she would a cat. "Just…you know you can talk to me, right? If anything's bothering you?"

"Yeah," he said quietly, trying not to shrink away.

She pulled back. "I love you, Sasuke-kun."

Sasuke's lips opened. Why? he wanted to ask. Why do you still love me so much?

"I love you, too," he said instead.

Sakura looked at him as if she heard his unspoken question.

Sasuke had to look away. "Let's…get to sleep."

Sakura let him pull the blanket over both of them and she turned on her side, facing him. Taking his hand, she pressed her lips against his knuckles. "I'm sorry, Sasuke-kun. I should've—"

"Enough, Sakura." Sasuke finally met her gaze, her green eyes swirling with such confusion and hurt it twisted his insides even further. "It's okay. It's not your fault. I'm just not…feeling well today."

He knew she didn't believe him.

But Sasuke didn't know what else to say. He couldn't very well say, I can't stop thinking about Naruto.

Sakura finally looked away and curled into him, hiding her face. She made no sound, nor did she make any movement, but he could tell that she was weeping. Sasuke wrapped his hand around her and pulled her in closer.

I'm so sorry.

..

Sasuke waited until she fell asleep. He got out of bed, put his clothes back on, and went outside into the veranda.

Usually, he was able to concentrate on Sakura.

But that laugh—how it made those blue eyes so bright—he hadn't seen that in so long.

It made something within him ache. Like a man consumed by greed, he hungered for more than what he deserved.

Sasuke scoffed.

Pining after a married man while married to a woman who loved him beyond his understanding. He was essentially cheating on her.

He felt bile rising up his throat.

How the hell he even ended up in this situation was beyond him.

Ah, no.

He knew exactly how he ended up in this situation.

Sasuke thought he was making amends. Doing what was right. He owed as much to Naruto and Sakura. They had been the ones who had steadfastly kept him in their hearts despite everything he'd done and said. But as much as Sasuke might have wanted to give back, he knew there wasn't anything he could do for Naruto. Not when Naruto was the one who gave Sasuke everything, got him to where he was now. Anything Sasuke could have given him wouldn't have amounted to anything.

Sakura, on the other hand, Sasuke could do something for. Sakura, who'd loved him through everything, even when it hurt her. He did have something Sakura wanted, and if he was able to give that to her, the answer felt obvious. But he'd given her time, just in case. He left Konoha, giving her time to move on from him, come to her senses. Maybe meet other people. Realize what a massive waste of time Sasuke would be. Realize how much more someone else would be able to give her.

Two years later, she was still devoted to him. And Naruto had gone and married the Hyuuga girl.

The idiot had asked Sasuke to be the best man.

Sasuke had refused. He knew he was being petty. But he couldn't. The pure bitterness he'd been feeling circulating within him would surely have spread, infecting everything and everyone around him, and Sasuke knew better than to ruin the happiest day of the dobe's life.

Naruto loved hard, romantic or otherwise. And back when he fought tooth and nail to get Sasuke back, Sasuke had wondered. Back when Naruto sacrificed everything to get him back. His dreams, his own life, even. Kakashi had once told Sasuke how Naruto had had a panic attack when he learned that Sasuke was named an international criminal to be killed on sight. The thought of him dying had given Naruto a panic attack for the first time, apparently.

It had frustrated Sasuke. No, it would make him downright mad. The way Naruto would make him wonder—even hope—and then give him a whiplash when the idiot would say—

Because you're my friend.

Naruto cared.

He—cared. A lot.

Everyone loved Naruto because of how…magnanimous he was. He shone his love on everyone, that was the kind of person he was.

Sasuke wasn't…special. He had never been special.

He'd felt disgusted with himself for even considering otherwise. That he might mean just a little bit more to Naruto than anyone else.

But of course not. Of course.

Sasuke had felt so…angry with the idiot. For leading him on for as long as he did, only to marry the Hyuuga girl.

Mostly, though, Sasuke was angry with himself. He could have done something, said something, before Naruto had the chance to fall in love with the girl.

But Sasuke couldn't. Because even if Naruto had…loved him like that, Sasuke had given him plenty of time to move on. Sasuke had barely visited, nor did he write back often. He'd been convinced that he would only drag Naruto down.

Yet, Sasuke felt so resentful, when he should have been feeling happy for the idiot. Naruto was not alone anymore. For that Sasuke should have been feeling proud of him. Because Sasuke knew better than anyone just how much Naruto deserved someone like Hyuuga Hinata, someone who'd loved him since the very beginning, before Naruto even made a name for himself, someone who loved him for him.

Sasuke knew there was nothing he could do for Naruto except leave him be to live his happily married life.

And that was when the loneliness really began to make itself known. The void that had always been inside him grew larger than he thought possible, more potent, gaining strength, leeching away the colors of his world, leaving him untethered.

So, when, again, Sakura asked to join him on his travels, he could no longer resist. Sasuke simply couldn't bear the thought of being alone anymore. Naruto was no longer available, and Sakura was offering everything he longed for. A family. A place he could call home. Sakura was a grown woman, he reasoned. She knew him. She knew what she was getting herself into. Sakura had been asking for years to join him, and who was he to deny her that? How patronizing of him to think he knew better than her.

And maybe, just maybe, a small part of him wanted to get back at Naruto. Maybe, a small part of him hoped that Naruto might hurt a little if he heard that Sakura became pregnant by him. The way Sasuke had hurt when he received that fucking wedding invitation. When he was hit with the crushing realization that Naruto really did not love him, that it had all just been his imagination.

He really was such a piece of trash.

Either way, Sasuke thought he would get over Naruto if he paid more attention to Sakura. He thought he could learn to love Sakura the way she wanted him to love her. Kill two birds with one stone.

But it wasn't as simple as that. Of course, it wasn't. Love was never that simple. Marriage was never that simple. He'd been so immature.

"Papa, hi!"

Almost startled, Sasuke looked up to find Sarada running to him, her face just as bright as—his.

The one good thing that came out of this whole mess.

He wished he'd been able to watch his little girl grow. Play with her like Naruto played with Himawari. Carry her on his back like Itachi used to carry him. She was something he never thought he'd ever get to have, something Sakura made possible for him.

Sasuke reached over and brushed her hair out of her face, to see her.

"Hey, peanut," he said. "I thought you were sleeping over at Cho-cho's?"

Sarada smiled cheekily, brushing the back of her head, looking unusually like Naruto as she did so. "I kinda…lied."

"Oh?" Sasuke raised an eyebrow. "So, where were you?

"I was at Cho-cho's! But I lied when I said I was going to sleep over there."

"And why was that?"

Sarada looked at him slyly. "I just wanted to give you and Mama some alone time."

So, she was to blame.

"What is it with you children and being so invested in your parents'…er…romantic lives?"

Sarada smiled sheepishly. "I just like seeing Mama happy. She's usually happy when you're around."

His marriage was in such shambles his kid daughter was trying to fix it.

Great.

But Sasuke found it interesting how Boruto had said the same thing. Was Hinata not happy these days? But Sasuke had just seen her on a date with Naruto. She seemed quite happy. Naruto, too.

"But you don't look happy, Papa."

Sasuke glanced at Sarada. "I'm…happy. Why do you say that?"

Sarada pushed her lips out. "You're lying."

He winced. "You're a bright girl, you know that?"

Sarada leaned away, unimpressed. "Mama always told me that flattery will get you nowhere."

He had to laugh at that. "Mama's right. But I wasn't trying to flatter you. It's the truth."

"Okayyy." She folded her hands, squinting at him. "So then, tell me. Why do you look so unhappy? Did you and Mama not have a good time?"

"N-No, we—had a good time. Thank you for suggesting it, Sarada."

"So, what happened?"

Sasuke tilted his head. "As your father, shouldn't I be the one asking you how you're doing? How you spent your day?"

Sarada mimicked him, tilting her head in the same direction as him. "But as your daughter, shouldn't I want you to be happy?"

Looking at her earnest face, he couldn't help but smile. He reached out and tapped her forehead. "You make me happy, love."

Sarada pouted, going a little pink in the cheeks. "Come onn, Papa! I'm trying to help, here."

"I'm serious." Pulling her to him, Sasuke kissed her forehead. "I was feeling a lot worse before you came. You being here with me made me feel a lot better. You don't have to do anything more."

The pink in her cheeks grew darker, and she looked away from him. "You…mean that?"

"Of course." He pulled back. "You're such a brilliant girl," …like your mom… "but you're also so caring."

Like…Naruto.

Sasuke touched her cheek, studying her face.

Did you get that from him?

Sarada did look up to Naruto a lot.

"I'm so proud to call you, my daughter, you know that?" he murmured, meeting her eyes. "I love you so much."

Sarada looked like she was trying hard not to smile but was failing miserably. Finally, she relented and hugged him.

"I love you too, Papa."

She snuggled into him, and Sasuke happily held her, kissing the top of her head. He hardly felt the cold breeze pass him by.

Sasuke should try again with Sakura. Mend things between them, if only for Sarada. She deserved a whole family, if not more.

But he decided he'd take his time with figuring out the how part of the equation. He didn't think he felt ready to talk with Sakura just yet. Not after what just happened.

Replies

nosimphere0, thanks for leaving such a lovely review, you made my day. And yep, there is definitely some wall between them, and it's gonna take some work on both their parts to break that wall down. The question is if they know how and where to start. Anyhoos, hope this new update also makes your day! Would love to hear your thoughts :)