Chapter 12 – Make My Heart A Better Place

"More weights?" she questioned unsurely.

Her boyfriend – it felt so goddamn good to call him that again – nodded and without breaking a sweat, lowered himself for the twenty-second time, the muscles in his shoulders rippling, his arms tense and sturdy.

She gripped a tighter hold of the handlebars belonging to the cross-trainer she occupied, the burn of her legs welcomed with open arms. The determination in Sasuke's features strengthened her resolve and she smiled, glancing in the direction of the television. The back-to-back music videos of her favourite band filled the homemade, state of the art gym, Sasuke's surrender of the music choice warming her heart. He'd never cared for her taste in music, always turning it over whenever she'd listened to more than one of her songs. Even something as insignificant as giving her full control was progress, in her eyes.

The next time his arms were fully extended, Sasuke paused, looking at her through his bangs. "Would you mind?"

Green eyes were wide when it clicked in her mind what Sasuke wanted from her and she slowed in her exercise, watching him unsurely. "R-Really?"

Hormones truly were a wicked thing and she scolded herself for getting so strung up on his request. Climbing off the cross-trainer, she breathed out a deep sigh, watching as Sasuke continued to thirty push ups before laying flat on the ground, waiting for her. There was no way to hide her red cheeks or the quickening of her heartbeat as she leaned down, first straddling his lower back before evenly distributing her weight. Her breasts were squashed against his back, ankles crossed on top of his legs and she shut her eyes, arms folding on the back of his neck.

"Is this okay?" she asked quietly.

She knew she wasn't the only one affected by the proximity when goosebumps broke out across his exposed skin and he faltered in resuming his push ups. "Yeah."

Smiling, Sakura lowered the side of her head to her arms, inhaling his scent with every breath she took. Was it normal for her skin to feel so heated when it brushed against his? For her stomach to flutter when he resumed his push ups? She could feel the pressure his muscles were under, yet he continued his constant up and down motion. The only indication of the strain was his breathing and she shut her eyes.

"Kurotsuchi-san called last night," she told him after his third push up. Carefully, while he was on the ground, she lifted her head, daring to slip her arms around his neck in an embrace. "She asked if we're free for the photo shoot this weekend."

"We being you and Itachi." Grimacing, she nodded. He snorted. "Sounds weird saying it like that."

Did it? "We're kind of a team for this whole thing," said Sakura with a small smile.

"Good," he muttered and there was a brief pause in his push up, the added weight proving a challenge for him and Sasuke puffed out a weighty breath. "He won't let them use you as a doormat or force you into anything."

Had Itachi said something? What if he had? Would Sasuke be mad at her for saying something? She didn't want to find out. "Yeah, I guess," she replied after a long pause. "I just wanted to make sure we didn't have anything planned."

"We don't," he said through his teeth, struggling with his seventh push up. Once he was lowered again, Sasuke tried to look at her from over his shoulder, scowling faintly, "Unless you want an excuse?"

Did she? After the events of last week, she hadn't spoken to Itachi that much. It kept replaying in her mind, though. Constantly. And each time it did, she thought of a new way of looking at the entire situation – the classic signs of an overthinker, she'd continuously scold herself – and now she wasn't even sure if she wanted to work with him anymore.

Were the interactions between them normal? How much influence would his words have on her if she continued to listen to his warnings? Was feeling whatever the hell she felt after a mere hug normal? What even was normal?

"What's wrong?"

She shook herself out of the bad mood, smiling. "Nothing."

"So what is it, then?"

"No, I don't need an excuse. I just wanted to make you my first priority," she lied. She wondered what made her feel worse: the lie itself, or the fact it came so easily to her. "Is that so wrong?"

There was a different kind of pause, one that made her heart skip a beat for reasons she couldn't fully understand until he reached up with one arm, managing both their weights without too much of a problem. Then, he tugged on her, encouraging her to switch her position from on his back, to underneath him. Her earlier blush was nothing in comparison to the one that raged proudly, covering new areas as it reached her chest and ears.

"S-Sasuke-kun?"

"Is this okay?" he asked, watching her closely as he lowered himself, but soon straightening back up until there was more distance between them.

She could only nod when their skin brushed, her tongue tied and refusing to cooperate with her. Green eyes were fixated on Sasuke's face as it grew closer and closer and closer, their noses skimming briefly, lips tantalisingly close, sending shivers down her spine, before he withdrew again, smirking down at her. The smirk grew more pronounced each time he saw the effect his actions had on her, leaving her a blushing, breathless mess of hormones.

It was on his eighth push up that her arm snaked its way around his shoulders, leg wrapping around half his body, yanking him downwards and keeping him there, their lips meeting in a desperate clash that had her hands balling into fists, back arching until their chests were pressed together tightly. His hand skimmed along her thigh, hiking it over his hip and he pushed down, making her breath leave her in a shaky sigh.

"No, Sasuke-kun. We-"

He silenced her with another insistent kiss, hand returning to her cheek to keep their faces together, making it harder to pull away. It was such an odd sensation, Sakura noticed numbly. Usually, she loved it when Sasuke kissed her passionately. She loved when he paid her attention. So why did she feel so uneasy? A kiss that previously caused her to melt against Sasuke, desperate to feel more of him, currently had her squirming in her place. She couldn't enjoy it.

"Sasuke-kun-"

"We're not doing anything wrong," he murmured against her lips.

She couldn't break the trust she'd earned, but how was she supposed to say no to her boyfriend without seeming like she was rejecting him? Sasuke had never been so insistent before, so… so pushy. What if saying no resulted in him never wanting to make the first move? What if it caused him anxiety somewhere down the line? What if she made him think the same way as herself, wondering why he didn't want her or if something was wrong with her?

Still… "The rules-"

"The rules say we can't share a bedroom," Sasuke said and her breath caught in her throat when his knee squeezed between her thighs, parting them. "Technically, this isn't a bedroom."

The memory turned the kiss bitter and in response, she tried to bring the spark back, tried to forget about the things whirling around in her mind, but it was impossible. It was there. It had happened and she couldn't forget it. Not when he was repeating the moves he'd used that night.

Keeping her eyes closed, she pulled him closer, kisses growing in intensity and soon his hand came down, pinning her wrists above her head as he took full control.

Why didn't she enjoy it?

Why couldn't she say no?

Gaze darting to the door, Sakura mentally begged of someone to walk in – no, not just someone. Itachi. She wanted Itachi to use his weird sixth sense thing and walk in on them, which would stop anything more from happening. If his parents caught them, then they could kiss all the trust they'd earned over the years, goodbye. But Itachi was a different story. Yes, he had authority but he was also rational and understanding.

Walk in, she pleaded. Walk in. Walk in. Walk in. Walk in. Please, Itachi. Walk in.

She found herself almost wishing the same thing.

Panic had her quickly bucking him off her and scurrying backwards, bumping into a treadmill. She panted for breath, eyes wide and fingers digging into the rubber mats they'd placed all over the gym, unable to miss the flash of hurt and self-loathing that crossed Sasuke's face as he realised where her mind had gone. In an instant, he could no longer meet her eye, his gaze drawn to the black rubber mat she was surely destroying with her unyielding grip.

"I-I'm sorry. I-"

"Don't apologise, Sakura."

How could she not? He looked so hurt and lost, so full of hatred towards himself for what he'd done to her. The moment had been sweet, so sweet and passionate and she'd been loving every minute of it. So why? Why had that awful memory she continuously suppressed lunged to the front of her mind, forcing everything to come to a halt? It wasn't like he'd actually raped her, was it? Why was it a problem if she'd told him they could move on from it?

It was because, despite the fact it hadn't progressed that far, she'd still been violated. He had still forced himself on her and it was going to take some time to come to terms with that, let alone move on from it. How could she have been so foolish as to think it would be that easy? Tears of frustration filled her eyes and she closed in on herself, knees coming to her chest and arms shielding her head from him. She could still hear Sasuke, though. She heard him faltering in what to do before he moved forward, awkwardly reaching out to her in an attempt to comfort her.

"I should be the one who's apologising," he muttered softly and his forehead dropped to her shoulder. "I hurt you, Sakura." There was a shuddering sigh and he came to kneel before her, hands gently prying her arms away from her head, trying to coax her into looking at him. "I told Itachi what happened."

Shocked, she looked to him, tears freezing in her eyes. "What?"

The sudden pain in his eyes didn't touch the shame she could see in them. "I couldn't keep it in – what I did to you."

Oh, Gods. What had Itachi said to him to cause him so much pain? "W-What did he say?"

"Nothing I didn't deserve to hear," he replied quietly, his voice almost a mumble, shocking her. Uchiha Sasuke did not mumble. He spoke clearly, proudly, even when he was wrong. Why was he mumbling? She couldn't tell if he was embarrassed at being scolded by his older brother, or ashamed of himself for his actions. "What I did was inexcusable, Sakura and I deserve the judgement I received. That's why I get it."

"You get what?" she questioned and wiped at her eyes.

Dark eyes looked away, a soft frown marring his features. "If you can't… be with me that way. We're still new to all this and I made the experience negative by doing what I did."

It seemed he couldn't admit out loud what he'd done, just as she couldn't stand to put it in the same sentence as his name without her skin crawling. "Sasuke-kun, I…"

"Don't try to deny it, Sakura."

But she didn't like the look in his eyes. The pain that was crushing him. It was obvious that what he'd done was weighing down on him – and so it should – but she wanted things to be normal between them. If it continued to fester between them like an infected wound, what would happen to their relationship?

Was that what he was thinking too?

"Are you breaking up with me again?"

Shock was written all over his face and he approached quickly, yanking on her arms and bringing her close. "No," he told her seriously and her heart lurched with relief. Shutting her eyes, Sakura shuffled closer, resting her head on his collarbone. "I don't want that."

"Neither do I," she mumbled.

She felt him take a deep breath and felt a responding shiver when he breathed out again. "Itachi said it's going to take time."

Yes, it would. But how long? What about when they grew tired of it all?

"And I'll wait for as long as I need to," he then said, surprising her and she felt tears stinging her eyes.

It was finally the weekend.

She'd woken early that morning, bags packed to the point of bursting as she tried to cram everything inside, ready for the photo shoot. Kurotsuchi had informed them there would be a makeup artist there, as well as a hairstylist, but just in case, Sakura had packed her own makeup.

Perhaps texting Itachi at the time she had, had been overkill, but fortunately for her, he'd already been awake, as had Sasuke, allowing her to spend an hour with him before they set off.

The atmosphere was uncomfortable, however. She noticed it instantly when she arrived, sending her boyfriend questioning glances, wondering if he was ever going to tell her why everything seemed so off. He didn't. In fact, he barely said two words to her. She had to wait to find out until breakfast, when his mother served them sporting a swollen cheek. Hiding her shock was impossible and she couldn't help but stare at the woman with wide eyes, mouth agape. There was bruising on her cheekbone, accompanied by a small laceration. If Sakura was to guess, she'd say it appeared as though she'd been caught with a ring, like somebody had backhanded her. Was that what happened?

The shocks didn't end there, however.

Her eyes widened that little bit further when Fugaku himself entered the dining room, refusing to look any of them in the eye while seating himself at the head of the table. It wasn't his demeanour that caused her surprise – not entirely, anyway. It was the bruising around his neck, bruising he tried covering with the collar of his shirt.

It wasn't hard to guess who had intervened, her eyes going straight to the man sat opposite her at the table. Quietly eating his breakfast, Itachi seemed at total ease, like he hadn't choked his father following his assault on his mother. It wasn't until he stole a glance at his parents that she noticed the tension in his eyes, the warning look when his gaze met Fugaku's. It screamed everything he wasn't saying out loud: and I'll do it again, should you hurt her.

Shit, she couldn't help but think and beneath the table, her hand found Sasuke's, giving it a brief squeeze before they dug into their respective breakfast. It didn't take a genius to notice he was shaken up by it all and part of her wanted to cancel the photo shoot, just so Itachi would remain at home, ready to protect his mother and brother.

The Uchiha family was toxic, she thought before scolding herself. It wasn't anyone's fault but Fugaku's. He was the bully. He was the wifebeater. He was the one who was traumatising his children. He was the reason why Sasuke behaved the way he did. It was like Itachi said: he didn't know any better. All he had to guide him was the dysfunctional marriage between his parents and it showed. So much.

It was one thing being told how unhealthy a relationship was, but a different matter altogether when witnessing it first-hand and noticing the similarities.

Was she seeing her future? Was that what she had to look forward to? Already, she had found out the hard way that Sasuke was capable of losing his temper, that he was able to use her to prove a point, that he could break her heart. Would he ever go that step further? Would he ever physically harm her?

She looked to him out of the corner of her eye and while she'd tried to be discreet, apparently, it was enough to gain Itachi's attention. It was hard understanding the emotion in his eyes, but if she was to hazard a guess, Sakura would have believed the look to be pleading – no, not pleading. It was a warning, but not in a harsh way. He was warning her that yes, this was her future if things continued the way they were progressing.

Breakfast took too long. Way too long.

When it came to leaving, Sakura was eager to hurry the hell up. The only reason she hesitated was because of Sasuke, who lingered outside the front door, watching them silently. He appeared lost, in a way and it had her faltering as she opened her car door.

How could she leave him there like that? In the middle of the mess that was his parents' marriage?

She jogged over to him, the force of her sudden embrace knocking the breath out of him, causing Sasuke to stumble a step or two.

"Sakura-"

"Call me," she told him seriously and pulled back, gazing at him with a puckered brow. "Not just if anything happens – to talk. If you want to."

The hard edge in his eyes faded. "Yeah."

When he carefully pulled away, wary of hurting her feelings, she took a step back and half turned, assessing his features. "Please, call me."

"Text me when you're free and I'll call."

Dressed for the stifling weather in a black tube top and green belted shorts, Sakura knew she looked good, because Sasuke's eyes were glued to her as she walked away and she smiled to herself while entering the car. After they had gotten back together, she had put all old band or novelty t-shirts to the back of her wardrobe, instead taking advantage of her staff discount every time she finished a shift at the store. By the end of summer, Sakura had no doubts that she would have an entirely new wardrobe.

"Are you sure you wouldn't like for me to drive?"

Itachi's question brought her out of her superficial thoughts and she raised an eyebrow, already beginning to reverse out of the wearily long driveway. "No, apparently you need to rest."

She could feel his inquisitive stare on her face, but she was too busy focusing on the manoeuvre of a three-point turn, putting her foot down once she put the gear into first. In her rear view mirror, she saw Sasuke re-entering his family home.

"Excuse me?"

It was with a huff that Sakura reached over his lap, grabbing her sunglasses off the dashboard and shoving them on. "What the hell happened?"

What she'd been expecting was total silence on the subject, or to at least be told that it was none of her damn business. Instead, Itachi responded with a sigh, "Mother disagreed with Father in front of our uncle-"

"Madara?" she interjected, frowning.

"Yes," he said tiredly and slipped on his own sunglasses. Until that point, they'd been resting in their respective case in his jacket pocket. "In response to, what my father views as disobedient behaviour, he struck her."

That, she'd managed to piece together herself. What she wanted to know was Itachi's involvement and why he suddenly involved himself. Going off what he'd told her previously, she gathered he hadn't ever taken sides, instead remaining silent. What made him finally stand up for his mother?

"Sasuke was in the room."

Her breath caught, grip tightening on the steering wheel until she gave into the groaning of her engine begging her to go up a gear.

"It was not the first time he witnessed Father hitting her, but it seems as though he has learned it shouldn't happen."

"He got involved."

It wasn't a question, but Itachi nodded anyway, telling her, "The moment Father turned on Sasuke, I could no longer remain silent. I restrained our father-"

Restrained? "That bruising looked a little more than just restraining-"

"What would you have me say?" he questioned and briefly, their eyes met, even through the cover of their sunglasses. "That I strangled my own father?"

"If that's how it happened." Shrugging lightly, Sakura added, "What use is there in lying to yourself?"

Again, Itachi sighed. "I did not strangle my father with the intention of killing him."

"But…?"

"Mother begged of me to release him." There was obvious frustration in his features, eyebrows knitting together. "According to her, it was her own fault for disobeying him."

It'd shaken him, Sakura realised, shocked. Out of the corner of her eye, she watched him look down at his hands, saw how he clenched them into fists. An odd, damn near overwhelming, feeling of wishing to take away his indecision and self-loathing filled her and she frowned, focusing on the road once more.

"You were defending Sasuke-kun, Ita-"

"Violence solves nothing," he countered, cutting her off. "I should have restrained him – what I did makes me no better than him."

The air was getting too much for her, threatening to suffocate her and Sakura rolled down the back windows, allowing the fresh air to circulate the car without causing her hair to obstruct her view.

"You are in the wrong lane. This lane will take us to mall."

Glancing over her shoulder, she thanked the Gods that the road was clear and quickly changed lanes, inwardly scolding herself for not paying better attention. "Sorry."

"I can take over, if you wish-"

"What's the matter?" she teased, smirking in his direction. "Don't you trust my driving?"

There was a pause in his reply as they hit the country roads, as she really put her foot down. "Not when you break the law."

"Hypocrite," she said with the same smirk. "You broke the law while driving Sasuke-kun's car." She glanced his way with a knowing look, raising her eyebrow in a clear challenge. "Several times."

As she'd expected, Itachi didn't back down, merely looked at the speed she was going before looking back to her. There was a daring emotion in his eyes, a smirk tugging at the corner of his lips and Gods, it shouldn't have, but it made her pulse quicken and in response, she gripped the steering wheel tighter.

"You should have allowed me to finish," he told her in a murmur. "I was saying: not when you break the law so pitifully." Sitting back in his seat, seeming at ease, he added flippantly, "At least do it properly."

What was this new side to Itachi and why the hell was her stomach in knots over him? Why did she prefer the carefree version of himself compared to the uptight one? The one who never broke composure? This one was…

Itachi reached forward and turned up the music, relaxing in his seat once more and she bit her lip, turning her entire focus on the road, pushing her car to its limits as she sped up.

"–scars of your love, they leave me breathless, I can't help feeling we could have had it all, rolling in the deep."

It was exhilarating – that was the only way she could describe it. Her reflexes were shockingly better than what she'd assumed them to be (it helped that they were on a long, straight and most importantly empty road) and she felt confident in herself, taking a deep breath through her nose and grinning with the rush she was experiencing. It had her grin widening impossibly when she met Itachi's gaze and she didn't think twice about catching him staring at her. How could she? She felt free.

"You're gonna wish you never had met me."

When was the last time she'd ever felt such a way? So… so not weighed down by the things going on in her life?

She never wanted it to end.

"Tears are gonna fall, rolling in the deep."

Unfortunately, like that thought alone had cursed her, Sakura was forced to slow down, her music replaced by the sound of her ringtone. It annoyed her beyond belief, but she swiftly apologised to Itachi and answered the call by pressing one of the many buttons on her steering wheel, accepting the call that came through via Bluetooth. Whenever her phone was in the car, it automatically connected to the speaker system, allowing her to speak on the phone while driving. Her parents hated it, but sometimes it was necessary.

"You're on loudspeaker," she warned.

"Is it true?" came an upset demand, blaring over her speakers and Sakura sighed in response, sharing an eyeroll with her passenger while turning the volume down. "Have you seriously gone away for the weekend with Itachi?"

Said Uchiha raised an eyebrow at the tone of his voice, clearly not missing the insinuations behind his words. It would have been impossible to miss, unless he truly was dense.

"I'm taking part in a project with Itachi-san, if that's what you're asking," she muttered, wishing that Naruto would get the message.

He didn't. "Sasuke said you're both gone for the whole weekend, Sakura-chan," he whined childishly. "Why the hell are you going away with him and not me?"

"Naruto-kun, are you attempting to take Sakura-san from my brother?"

"What? No," he yelled through the phone and Sakura contemplated turning him down again. Or maybe off altogether. "But what the hell are you doing, huh? You're the one who's whisked her away for some romantic weekend away to who knows where to do who knows what to her, you-"

The blush on her cheeks was horrendous. "Naruto, stop," she demanded and immediately, he fell silent. "I promise, nothing like that's going to happen, okay?"

He sounded like he was pouting when he replied with, "Fine."

"I do have a favour to ask, now that you're on the phone," she said as an idea came to mind and noticing a new sign when Itachi pointed it out to her, she indicated to turn left, following it. "Will you hang out with Sasuke-kun this weekend? Either keep him busy or away altogether-"

"Why? Did something happen?"

Even if Itachi hadn't been there, she wouldn't have gone into details. "Just… do it. For me. Please?"

"Sure, Sakura-chan." There was obvious concern laced in his words but fortunately for her, he didn't push the topic any further. "A or B?"

She sighed, pretending not to notice Itachi's questioning gaze. "D."

There was a brief whistle. "That bad, huh."

"Bordering on E," she told him with a heavy heart. "But don't make it too obvious, okay?"

"Yeah, yeah, I can do that," he said in a way that told her he was already texting Sasuke. "I'm thinkin' a road trip, this time."

That would be good for him, Sakura thought, agreeing with him. "Thank you, Naruto."

"Sure thing," came his murmured reply. Then, speaking more directly to them, he warned, "No feeling her up, Itachi! Ya hear me?"

Without a second thought, she hung up on him, apologising profusely the second the music began playing once more. It continued at the same low volume, becoming background noise, allowing them to talk over it with ease.

"Don't apologise," Itachi told her, smirking faintly. "We both know how this looks to an outsider."

Yes, they did. But Naruto was not an outsider – he never had been. He was there the day she met Sasuke, the day she confessed her feelings to him, the day they started dating. He was there every step of the way, watching their relationship grow from awkward pre-teen romance, to… whatever it was now. Even if he wasn't a main participant, like herself and Sasuke, he'd always been there in the background, supporting them. If there was anyone (other than Sasuke) who knew they could trust her, who knew she would always remain faithful, then it was Naruto. He knew her. Just the insinuation, joking or not, hurt her.

Was it her dampening mood that had Itachi changing the subject from her suspected infidelity? Sakura wasn't sure, but she was grateful for it, when he asked her, "Plan A?"

Sighing, she followed the signs for the cabins. The drive wasn't too bad and the scenery was certainly appealing, however, they would be stuck in the car for at least half an hour and she knew they were developing an awful habit for bickering when trapped in each other's presence.

"After you left and your dad started pressuring Sasuke-kun, Naruto and I came up with several plans of action," she informed him and her lips twitched, trying to smile. Inside, she didn't feel like smiling. It hurt recalling all the times they'd had to move onto the different stages of their plans. "At first, all we'd have to do was call or text. You know, let him know we're there?"

Itachi nodded and again, she sighed, making a right turn. The road was busier, the traffic congesting and she groaned in response. Traffic was the worst, but what made it worse was the quickly escalating temperature.

"Well, things progressed pretty rapidly," she explained after a couple of moments and turned up the air conditioning, shutting the windows so that it'd work properly. "We never really thought we'd have to plan strategies on how to counter the effect your dad had on Sasuke-kun, but we were having to come up with more ways to comfort him."

"D?"

"D is…" She trailed off, eyes narrowing momentarily. Sakura was glad she was wearing her sunglasses, because it took her a while to regain composure, tears threatening to fill her eyes. "Plan D is recent – not even a year old yet." Glancing at him out of the corner of her eye, she said, "It means get him the hell out of there."

Her words shook him. It was clear in the way it took him a while to reply. When he did, his voice was quiet and he asked, "E?"

"There is no E yet," came her equally quiet response. "But it seems like we're gonna need a new one soon."

"What makes you so sure?" Even with her sunglasses on, she knew she nailed the 'are you stupid' expression, for he sighed and murmured, "He is copying our father's example."

"I haven't told Naruto," she said, adding with her pleading look alone that he not mention it to anyone, least of all Naruto. "It would only stir up more trouble if he found out."

"There is always the chance of Sasuke telling Naruto-kun himself," he informed her. His head shifted, his gaze drawn to the wildlife they could spot once she made yet another turn. They were on a dirt road now, one that would lead them to the cabin eventually. "He told me, after all."

Yes, he had and she was so glad for that. Bottling up his emotions would only exacerbate the situation. "You could've been easier on him, you know."

"And what would Sasuke learn, had I been?"

"I don't know," she said with frustration. "That you're an understanding older brother who'll love him unconditionally?"

He raised a brow at her. "I am. However, that does not mean that I will stand back and watch him abuse someone who cannot defend themselves – no." He cut her off firmly. "You will not defend yourself, Sakura-san. You will never willingly walk away from Sasuke, no matter how badly he hurts you."

She opened her mouth, about to unleash hell, but she snapped it shut, unable to think of a retort that wouldn't condemn her.

"Had Sasuke gone through with his actions, had he raped you, would you still be by his side?"

"I…" He watched her expectantly and she looked away, focusing harder than necessary on the road, sickened by her own answer of, "I don't know."

There was yet another sigh and she noticed him returning his hard gaze to the road, only moving in his seat when she went over bumps in the road. Soon, his hand came to the handle above him, preventing himself from banging his head on the ceiling.

"You should slow down," he warned her. "At the very least, you will ruin your tyres."

Frustratingly, he was right, so she did as instructed and slowed down. While she could change a tyre, she did so unwillingly, hating the dirt that never failed to get stuck under her nails, or all over her hands. It felt like she never got it off.

Much to her delight, the cabin came into view, though the sight of what was supposed to a rustic beauty was spoiled by the two vans parked at the side of it. Still, it didn't stop her from coming to a stop, ignoring Itachi's questioning gaze when she snapped a couple of pictures of the outside. One with the vans, the other with vans cropped out. It was in that moment that she decided she would document their photo shoot (or as much of it that she was allowed) and everything surrounding it.

"You're here," they heard Kurotsuchi shout before they even saw her, before they'd even parked up outside the cabin. "And you're early – even better."

She guessed that they would be leaving their belongings in the car for the time being, since they were already being whisked away to one of the areas for their photo shoot, her stomach twisting with excitement when she saw the stunning white gown that was begging her to wear it again.

"You've both eaten, right?"

Finally, she was able to get a good look at Kurotsuchi and part of her felt her excitement increase at the sight of her seriousness. Well, that and the fact that, behind her, she spotted a makeup artist setting up her workstation, along with a hair stylist.

As soon as they nodded, lost in the chaos, they were shooed, handed over to the artists.

They hadn't worked half as much on Itachi as they had her. Was she supposed to be offended by that?

The only thing stopping her from biting her lip worriedly was the fact they'd only just finished her makeup. It'd taken her nearly an hour to perfect it, with Kurotsuchi occasionally reappearing to throw in her opinion before vanishing again to make sure her set was exactly how she'd envisioned it. Then, she was given ten minutes to stretch her legs before sitting down for another period of time as another woman worked on her hair, tugging and spraying and curling.

All the while, Itachi was barely touched with makeup, his hair taking all of fifteen minutes to style until he was told to go and get dressed. To add to her annoyance, the costume designer who'd taken their sizes was back and had informed Sakura that she would need help getting into her dress, now that her hair and makeup was done.

"It's just because Kurotsuchi-san wants this to look as natural as possible," the designer explained while easing the dress over Sakura's head, smiling victoriously when it fit like a glove. "She wants it to look like you're really getting married." Turning her, she eyed her critically before handing over the heels, allowing Sakura to use her for balance as she put them on. "What heterosexual man wears makeup on his wedding day?"

She supposed the older woman had a point, but it was still upsetting that they spent so long on her. Then again, most women spent hours getting ready for their wedding day, didn't they?

The ping of her phone had her glancing over at the screen, inwardly grinning to herself when she saw the notifications blowing up. She'd been cryptic in her post, uploading the pictures of the cabin and vans. Already, she had likes in the double digits, along with many curious friends asking if she was on a movie set. Oh, what would they think if she posted a picture of herself in a freaking wedding dress? She wouldn't, of course. Not without Kurotsuchi's permission. But she was curious to see everyone's reactions.

There was a single knock before a young girl was sticking her head around the door, headpiece in place as she pressed down on it, asking them, "Is Haruno-san ready?"

She met the designer's eager eyes, glad that someone else felt equally excited to get out there and show off the dress. But why wouldn't she? The dress was her design. She'd no doubt spent many sleepless nights creating the masterpiece. Perhaps the photo shoot would also be benefiting her business?

Everyone was rushing around when she entered the set and she felt her confidence go up a notch at the looks of approval she received, their appreciative gazes following her to the centre of it all. She held her dress up at the designer's request, keeping it from brushing along the dirt floor until she was on a single, red carpet. It guided her to the makeshift altar and she paused at the top of it, breath caught in her lungs.

The set was nothing short of wondrous. From the intimate location, to the rolled out red carpet, accompanied by white iron benches, their intricate designs complementing the carpet in a way she couldn't even describe, to the rounded arch covered in greenery and white flowers.

What stood out the most to her, however, was the man standing beneath it. He held the air of a proud man in his tuxedo, standing tall as he conversed with someone who had her smiling, her nerves subsiding entirely. With Deidara there, they would be in safe hands. He was a friendly face amongst all the chaos.

She opened her mouth to announce herself, but before she could, a barrier – a literal, six-foot freaking barrier – was situated between her and Itachi, refusing to let him see her.

"Don't ruin it," Kurotsuchi scolded her playfully, hand resting on the divider. "He's not allowed to see his bride until we begin."

But she wasn't his–

The thought shut down and Sakura nodded, her nerves returning tenfold and she brushed her hands down the dress, distracting herself with smoothing out the non-existent creases.

"Listen up, everyone," Kurotsuchi demanded and took a step back, gesturing for them all to get closer. "This is a closed set, for the comfort of my models, got it? And absolutely no photography other than myself. Nana-san, Hiroki-san, I said you may take pictures of the hair and makeup, but please remember, that's all." They nodded in agreement. "Emi-san, you were also given permission to take pictures of your designs – and your own designs only. I will also take an extra photograph of them together for you for your portfolio – free of charge, for making such a beautiful gown."

The designer, now known as Emi, grinned brightly.

"Now, are we ready?"

Sakura took a deep breath, glancing down at herself. The nerves were growing and she felt herself growing restless with them.

Her hair was curled and expertly pinned in a way that matched the theme of the wedding, half up and half down, along with several strands to frame her face. To complement the look, the hair stylist (she wasn't sure whether it was Nana or Hiroki) had placed several diamond studded pins, and it certainly worked to make her hair feel amazing.

"Sakura-san, did you bring music?" Worriedly, she shook her head and Kurotsuchi smiled. "Don't worry. I'll play a playlist that was left behind by another model."

Model. Was that what she was now? It certainly boosted her ego thinking that way and Sakura barely held back her grin, focusing on the divider intently, more than anything wanting to see Itachi's completely real reaction to her–

Green eyes widened.

Why did it matter what Itachi thought of her appearance? Why did his opinion suddenly matter?

"Let's go!" Kurotsuchi ordered.

She took several steps back, nodding to Deidara, who surprised Sakura with his sudden appearance beside her. He paused in placing his hands on the divider, sparing a single, almost sympathetic glance in Itachi's direction.

"Good luck," he said, and she wondered why it seemed like he said it more to Itachi than her.

And then the divider was pulled away and she felt her breath once more disappear from her lungs at the expression on Itachi's face when their eyes met.

In that moment, she didn't hear the clicking of the camera, barely took notice of the flashes and she certainly didn't pay attention to Deidara's knowing smirk. No, in that moment, she was too focused on Itachi's widening eyes, his lips as they parted slightly and much to her utter delight, a faint smile pulled at them, eyes warm. Was that… Surely that wasn't the hints of a blush on his cheeks? No, no it wasn't. Right?

"That's the look," they vaguely heard Kurotsuchi praising them. "Remember that look, you two."

Both of them?

There was barely a chance to think about it – not when all she could focus on was Itachi's expression. Heartbreakingly, she admitted to herself that it was exactly how she'd always wanted Sasuke to look at her. No, it was more than that. It was more than she'd ever wanted and it made her equal parts sad as it did ecstatic and confused.

"Bouquet," snapped Kurotsuchi. "Props-guy, where the hell is the bouquet?"

Something was shoved into her hand and Sakura looked down, a soft smile gracing her lips at the gracious way the bouquet was arranged, tied together with a single white ribbon.

Another flash.

"Walk towards him," came another order. "You know how to walk down the aisle, don't you?"

Of course she did. She and Ino had only practised it a couple hundred times in their bedrooms, taking turns to be the bride. The music that was playing was definitely not one that she would be timing her procession to, so she improvised, going against the beat as she slowly approached Itachi.

Shoulders back, head tilted ever so slightly to show off her jaw… Oh, Sakura had practised all the looks with Ino. Figuring out what she had to work with, she found all the best angles to accentuate her beauty. With the straightness of her back, the tilt of her head to avoid looking at the ground, her shoulders back and bouquet being held just below what felt natural to her, she displayed a confidence she had never felt before and wondered briefly if that was how she was supposed to feel on her actual wedding day.

She wasn't the only one to take a deep breath when she reached Itachi, it seemed and her pride took another leap at the look in his eyes. There were extras for this specific part, Sakura noticed as they came to a quick pause in the photographs, giving her the chance to realise there were many seated around them, complete with the fake officiant standing before them.

There were several snaps of them standing at the altar once her bouquet was taken away, with the officiant pretending to go through with the ceremony, the guests cheering and smiling lovingly.

He looked so content, she thought to herself and when their hands joined for their fake vows, she noticed she wasn't the only one looking down as their fingers entwined. It felt so effortless, pretending to marry Itachi. Did that sound stupid? Looking up at him when he slipped a wedding ring onto her finger, she smiled freely, without a care for how it would make her look, before returning the favour.

So lost in the moment that she was, Sakura didn't think twice about their next direction of kissing the bride, her hand worryingly naturally finding a place on the nape of Itachi's neck just as his came to her waist and slipped to her lower back, gently guiding her, closing the gap between them until they were a mere inch apart, lips parted in anticipation, eyes shutting and a blush shone proudly on her cheeks at the undeniable spark.

However, it was that exact spark, when their lips almost brushed that she suddenly came back to herself, the shock of what she'd been about to do massively outweighing the brief tingle of their skin touching, of their lips nearly sealing.

She quickly took a step back, swallowing hard.

"That may have been better than an actual kiss," Kurotsuchi congratulated them. Much to her pleasure, since she'd been certain that she would have upset her with destroying one of the most important parts of a wedding, the woman blushed faintly and turned her back on them. "I knew I picked the right couple."

"We're not-"

The argument was too defensive, Sakura realised and silenced herself. She hesitantly met Itachi's eyes, her chest rising and falling. Was it from the stress? From the… Gods, she didn't want to admit it, but from the longing she'd felt. The urge to close the distance, to feel the spark that had damn near stolen her breath permanently, was overwhelming and she could tell Itachi felt no different.

She couldn't hear anything, Sakura realised belatedly. Was it because of the pain in her chest? She… Sasuke's face flashed to the front of her mind and her eyebrows puckered in a soft frown. How could she betray him like that? To almost kiss his brother – not just anyone, but his freaking brother was so…

No, she couldn't cry. She couldn't.

"Onto the next part," Kurotsuchi ordered and it was like all noise resumed around them, everyone suddenly getting involved as they took apart the set, replacing it with different backgrounds for the bride and groom pictures. "We won't take too many of these – I already have my perfect shots."

A careful hand tipped her chin up, forcing her to meet Itachi's concerned gaze and she felt a horrible pang in her chest.

They'd gotten too caught up in the moment. Too lost in the fantasy of having such a perfect wedding – even if everything was fake and rushed through just for pictures.

Itachi must have known that nothing he said would ease the guilt and she knew he felt it, too. She could see it in his eyes as he remained silent, also frowning.

"Guys, come on," stressed Kurotsuchi and Sakura turned, following after the woman to the next set.

All the while, she could feel Itachi's eyes on her, had noticed before turning fully how his hand hung mid-air, like he was reaching out to her.

She squeezed her eyes shut.

Sasuke, please, please forgive me.