Earth 19524

Jazzy music plays.

"I wonder if there wasn't some science for gorgeousness. Like magnets, two beautiful people do repel; maybe, it's simply intimation that causes others who are not so beautiful to feel inferior when approaching someone beneath them."

A whiff of pee, smoke, and whatever else attacked Stiles's nostrils. He felt the lick of Harry the pug's tongue kissing his face as he opened his eyes, noticed himself facedown on the concrete and slowly turned over to stare into the blue sky and an airplane flying overhead.

To the right of him, a series of old worn down buildings and to the left, the same. Feeling a bit tired, he forced himself up, picking up Harry, and tried to get his bearings. Shaking off that feeling of exhaustion, he looked around to see he was now standing in an alleyway of some large city.

"Hey Mister!" A guy called out from behind him.

Stiles turned around to see a homeless guy shaking a cup in front of him. "You got five dollars on you for a burger?"

The FBI agent lifted his brows. "What happened to a dollar?"

The homeless man frowned. "Inflation, man. You know a dollar doesn't even get a coffee at McRonald's. So, you got a five on you?"

Harry growled as Stiles soothed his fur.

"Sorry, bro," Stiles apologized. "I don't have any change."

The homeless man grumbled. "Fuck you then!" He walked away as Stiles saw his friends racing toward him toward the other entrance of the alley.

"Stiles! Thank God!" Scott shouted. "We found you!"

The pack appeared unharmed. Allison and Chris in their tactical gear, holding their duffel bags of weapons. His father, Noah Stilinski, casually dressed but concealing his gun inside the jacket he wore and Melissa McCall carefully clutching her medical bag. The only one that looked different was Kuza who had changed into some casual street clothes of a flannel shirt and jeans while carefully holding her katana that she had wrapped up in her robes.

His best friend placed a hand on his shoulder. "We lost you when we went through the portal so we weren't sure where you'd gone. Kuza tracked your scent a few feet away."

"Sometimes my magic is unpredictable." The kitsune explained. "Teleporting a large group doesn't always mean we'll be in one spot."

"Where are we?" Melissa asked the group.

Chris answered her question. "From the looks of it, New York City. Greenwich to be exact."

"How do you know, Dad?" Allison asked her father.

Chris led the group out of the alley and into the busy sidewalk of people passing by them. Ignoring the weird strangers that suddenly appeared, a typical reaction from a New Yorker, the hustle and bustle of the busy street and vehicles moving past them, Chris directed their attention to an amazing site in the distance.

"Is that?" Melissa asked the group in wonder.

"It is!" Sheriff Stilinksi finally said it.

"The Twin Towers!"

"But how?" Scott wondered.

"It's a different world," Kuza informed them. "A different reality. The tragedy never happened here."

"It's amazing," Allison whispered. She took it all in.

"It certainly is," her father agreed.

Stiles had to be the one to break up the wonderment. "That's all great but we need to rescue Eli." He turned to Kuza. "Any sense that the Beast might appear?"

Kuza raised her finger to think. "Not yet, but I do feel a tingle of a shadow nearby. It should be approaching soon."

Jazzy music plays again.

This time everyone noticed.

"Did you hear that?" Allison asked the group.

Melissa nodded. "I did. It sounded like some cha-cha music. Are we near some salsa club?"

"As I sifted through the rubble of my soon to be ex, Mr. Big Sourwolf, and his messy separation from his bitch wife, Kate, it now just occurred to me. Maybe the fight between married men and their mistresses and sidepieces are like the conflict in Israel and Palenstine. Nobody wins and there is always a stalemate…"

"All right," the sheriff rubbed his chin. "I know everybody heard that. It's like an internal monologue coming from an invisible narrator."

Kuza shrugged. "It's a different world. We're the audience and everyone else are the players. Whomever is narrating is projecting their internal thoughts that only we can hear. Remember, we're the outsiders here."

"I wonder who this narrator is," Scott pointed out.

Henry started to bark as Stiles turned around to see a strange quartet coming down the sidewalk on the opposite end of the street. His eyes widened. It was him and his friends: Scott, Jackson Whittemore, and Danny Mahealani; all dressed in some unique designer outfits.

"Is it that men have an innate aversion to monogamy? I wonder in a city like New York, has monogamy become too much to expect? Take Jackson Whittemore, for example, a successful brokerage attorney who represents one of the biggest financial firms on Wall Street. No matter how many he has on the Ember app, guys are too intimidated by his good looks, sleek designer Rada suits and Booey LaBonn briefcases to really see through his tough exterior personality that he has a heart of gold."

"Jackson as a lawyer?" Sheriff Stilinski gasped. "This really is a different universe!"

Melissa bit her lip. "Should we really be eavesdropping on their conversation? It feels a little intrusive."

Allison shrugged. "This is like a real life reality show except we know these people and we're watching a trainwreck unfold."

Chris rubbed his chin. "I can't believe we can ACTUALLY hear their private conversation." He turned to Kuza. "How is this possible?"

The kitsune threw up her hands. "Every reality is different. In this one, this feels like a television show. Just observe and don't engage while we hunt for the Beast."

"I'm more invested in this situation." Sheriff Stilinksi commented. "I mean this Stiles is dressed even more flamboyantly and I can't picture my own son having any style."

Upon hearing his father's comment, Stiles frowned. "Hey! I'm a new gayby! Give me some credit, I'm still developing my own sense of style!"

"Shh," Scott waved to his friends. "This is getting good!"

"My last date didn't even know me!" Jackson griped. "The least he could do was get to know me before he ghosts me! I mean I'm hot enough to be everybody's type!"

"As Jackson went on about how thirsty everyone is over him, I couldn't help but wonder about my own self-worth in the dating field. Ten years playing in New York City. Countless dates. Five real relationships, not counting Mr. Big Sourwolf. Several break-ups. I mean what was wrong with me? I'm rich, successful and handsome and the most popular columnist of the social scene. My article, Queens in the Big Apple, is frequently featured in the New York Times and Runway Magazine. What couldn't I have that one committed, healthy relationship?"

"Bro! You're a tool!" Stiles shouted. "I can't believe this Stiles is so superficial!" He turned to his friends. "Am I this shallow and arrogant?"

The group suddenly shook their heads. Stiles was not buying it.

"You know," he pouted. "You're all lousy liars."

Sheriff Stiinski folded his arms. "You know, son, you tend to go for people out of your league. I mean you should aim the bar a little lower."

Stiles balked. "Seriously, Dad? I know I'm good enough to get anyone I want. Does anyone think I'm out of my league?"

A grumble came from the group.

The FBI agent scoffed. "Okay then, give me an example!"

"Lydia," Allison blurted.

"Derek," added Scott.

Stiles rubbed his face. "Gee, thanks for the support."

His father exhaled. "Son, you tend to go for people who won't give you the time of day instead of attracting people that really appreciate you. I think you like the chase more when you're the one doing the chasing."

"It's called dating, shooting your shot," defended Stiles. "What's wrong with that?"

"Sounds like stalking," Chris remarked.

"And a restraining order," Melissa rolled her eyes.

"Oh fuck you all!" Stiles clucked. "My Cruisr and Ember dates would say otherwise."

Harry the pug let out a bark.

"See!" Stiles responded. "Even Harry agrees."

His friends ignored his outburst and continued to eavesdrop on the other Stiles and his conversation.

"Are you saying we should give up on love?" This universe's Scott frowned. "That's sick! I still believe in true love and there is a girl or boy out there that wants a commitment and monogamy and marriage? Where am I going to find that in New York?"

"High society socialite, Scott McCall, and his eternal search for true love like in those fairytales he grew up with. Such an optimist when it comes to dating but not a realist with how the dating world really works. In view of the current circumstances, I couldn't help but wonder if Scott was looking for a Mr. or Miss Right or a Mr. or Miss Right Now."

"Whoa!" Scott protested. "I'm not that lovelorn! This version of me can't be this lovesick!"

"I beg to differ," Allison giggled. "I think it's sweet!"

Kuza interrupted. "I mean every world has a facet of your personality that could exist. Maybe this version of Scott McCall is really this lovesick."

"Again," the Alpha argued. "This is not me!"

"You know, the guy I hooked up with last night," Danny remarked while licking on a lollipop. "His jizz tasted funny!"

"Lastly, there is Danny Mahealani, the sexpert of our little friend group. The man was so sexually experienced that he literally went through half of Manhattan and the lower eastside. Even the Grindr app made him the featured coverboy and offered him a five year contract of free service; a perk he took full advantage of."

"Damn!" Stiles remarked. "The Danny of this world is a ho!"

"One would think that Danny would be the slut of all of New York, but he's simply a self-assertive and confident single man who doesn't believe in commitment or strings attached. His view of relationships means being attached and having to deal with cheating. The fact is, the act of cheating is defined by the act of getting caught. One doesn't exist without the other. I wondered, was Danny right? Is cheating like the proverbial tree in the forest? That it doesn't exist if there's no one around to catch you? In a gravity-free world of 'anything goes', what constitutes cheating? Whatever the reason, Danny has determined that he will remain a bachelor."

"Maybe, that's because Danny is compensating by refusing to get hurt and experiencing a heartbreak!"

Stiles rolled his eyes as he shouted out his opinion upon the quartet of single friends.

"Who said that? In a city as cynical as New York, can a gorgeous columnist like myself possibly descend into madness due to stress and singlehood?"

"No dumbass!" Stiles shouted. "You're just a pathetic excuse for a human being using a society column to address the fact that you approve of being a doormat and the other man…er woman!"

"Shh, Stiles!" Scott whispered to his best friend. "We're not supposed to interfere, remember?"

"Fuck that, Scott!" Stiles yelled. "All we've been doing is listening to these vapid whores talking about sex in the city and complaining about their dating lives!"

"Again, I say who is making these accusatory remarks? Three weeks ago, I got a Dear John letter from my ex, Lydia, which kept me torn. Did I want to invest in all my time being the other significant other in my Derek Hale's life, my Mr. Big Sourwolf, only to be considered second best to his soon to be ex-wife? Would he stay or was I that bad in bed?"

Stiles shook his head. "If you're this pressed about being shallow, Derek needs to dump you!" He shouted.

"Son," the sheriff frowned. "I don't think they're listening to you."

"Your father is right," Kuza added. "I mean their internal monologue seems to be centered only on superficiality…"

"Later that night, I can't help but to wonder as my friends and I looked across the way and noticed doppelgangers of ourselves staring at us from across the way. It was like a mirror reflection, except the only thing staring back at me was my twin who looked like one of the homeless bums of New York City. I mean I had to gasp at the clothes he was wearing. Not even designer. Did he just shop off the clearance rack of Wall-Co, the discount warehouse that catered to the less fortunate? Even if I wouldn't be caught dead in such an ensemble if I couldn't wear my Karen Donna jeans."

"Hey! These jeans were 80% off!" Stiles shouted to his other world clone. "And they fit comfortably!"

"I wondered, in today's youth obsessed culture where botox and a little nip and tuck are necessary, had this version of Stiles not been considered a good skin care routine? I mean he's peeling like a lizard and not the good kind that graces my alligator Tucci satchel."

Stiles glared at his twin. "That's it, Shallow Boy! I'm gonna kick your ass!" He began to march toward the group as the other Stiles raised his hands to shield his face when Harry started to bark at something.

"Oh crap!" Kuza pulled her katana from its wrappings.. "The Beast is here!"

Light crackled as the quartet of this world looked behind them to see a hulking beast immersed in shadow and smoke roaring at them. On his shoulder still appeared an unconscious Eli.

"Ready your weapons!" Chris instructed.

Everyone pulled out their pistols, bows, knives, while the Alpha, Scott, displayed his growing eyes, fangs, and sharp claws. This universe's quartet screamed, as did the bystanders, in horror as another narration played in everyone's ears.

"The horror of this abomination! Where did it come from and why is it attacking? I watched in fear as I soiled my new Manuel Blondedicks loafer as the thing roared, picked up Danny and stabbed him through the chest. The poor queen bled all over his new Whoregeo Armandi suit. On the positive side, he always wanted his dates to nail him!"

"Oh shut the fuck up!" Stiles yelled at his clone. "You're goddamn annoying!"

"I'm not sure why my fake twin is so pressed! I mean one of my good friends died in front of me! I should be the one traumatized. I just ruined a good pair of designer shoes. Now where were we? Oh yeah, the Beast roared again. This time by pulling Jackson by the throat and ripping it out like he was given him a major hickey. Mr. Big Sourwolf gave me one time in his limo. I don't know how he explained that to his then wife…"

"Do we have to save this world's Stiles?" The FBI agent asked. "It's not like he is worth anything."

"Stiles!" Scott frowned. "It isn't our job to let people die even if he is a douche in this universe. I mean look at my twin. He's a bit lost but I'm sure he has a good heart."

Allison shifted her boyfriend's attention to where the Beast was occupied. "Is that why he's screaming like a little girl and running away?"

Sure enough, this Scott of this world sprinted like his wife depended on it in the opposite direction leaving this universe's Stiles to deal with the Beast.

"Wouldn't you know it? The challenge of loyalty in a friendship. Here I am having to clean up Scott's mess once again as our entire friendship group dies and is killed by some Jolly Black Giant and he screams like he's having a really bad orgasm! No wonder nobody wants to make a commitment to him or that fact that his split ends…ACCCCKKKK…"

This world's Stiles could not finish his internal thought before the Beast grabbed his ankle and slammed his body into the pavement. Back and forth and back and forth this version of Stiles was smashed and bashed onto the concrete until no sound or movement came from him. Now just a corpse, the Beast tossed the lifeless body of the Stiles clone in the middle of the street as onlookers screamed in horror at the attack that just took place in front of them.

With one final roar, the Beast released its final triumphant scream, clutched the sleeping Eli on his shoulder, and twisted its wrist until a shimmer of light appeared behind it. With another crack of illumination, it disappeared into the portal and vanished as it closed up.

"Damnit!" Chris scowled. "We lost it again!"

Sounds of sirens could be heard as the sheriff offered his advice.

"I think we better get out of here," he suggested. "We don't want to explain this mess to the officers of this universe!"

"I can't agree more," nodded Kuza. She tapped her katana on the ground, causing her tails to crack another bit of light until a portal opened up in front of them.

The group dashed in leaving Stiles the last to exit. Harry the pug barked as he held him in his arms.

"Yeah, Harry, this is one crazy adventure!"

It certainly is Stiles Stilinski.

For this only the beginning. There are many more worlds.

Many more Stiles's and Derek's.

I, Kuzahoa, the kitsune foretell it!

Sometimes I couldn't help but wonder if reading about alternative universes are sometimes worth it especially if you're going for a Sex and the City reference

I mean it could happen in the universe.