Ramen Doodles

By Andrew J. Talon

Disclaimer: I do not and probably never will own Naruto or any other copyrighted works mentioned in this story. I am not writing this for profit.

And then there are those crossovers that make no sense... So let's twist them.

"Hey Hinata-chan!" Naruto said cheerfully, "I found this weird tape in some house that was being demolished in old Konoha-You want to watch it?"

Hinata looked up from the dishes. It had been three months since they were married, and her heart still quickened every moment they were together.

"S-Sure!" She said happily.

They sat down, as Naruto pushed the tape into the player. They cuddled as they watched the video... Which seemed to consist of some pale girl with long hair crawling out of a well.

"Is... This an arthouse movie or something?" Naruto asked.

"I don't know," Hinata admitted, "I'm not very well versed in those kinds of films." She tilted her head. "Maybe it means the emptiness of life or..."

"Huh," Naruto muttered, "that is really weird."

He got up and ejected the tape. He shook his head as he walked back up to his wife. He cuddled with her.

"I'm sorry, Hinata-chan," he said, "how about I make it up to you in the bedroom?"

Hinata giggled, as Naruto pulled her up into his arms.

"Sounds good to me~!"

A terrifying figure emerged from the TV screen after they passed. She walked the hallways of the house, intent on murder.

She walked into the bedroom... Saw what was going on... And blushed, before she quickly vanished.

One week later...

Hinata and Naruto were once again sitting in front of the TV, intent on watching a better movie. Hinata was a fan of action movies, and Naruto enjoyed them as well. Princess Koyuki was still acting, and having fun with her role as the villainess.

The TV flickered, and then the well from before appeared. The girl appeared... And then emerged from the television screen. She held her fingers up threateningly as she advanced on them.

Hinata and Naruto blinked. Hinata activated her Byakugan and sucked in a deep breath. Naruto then grinned.

"Hello!" Naruto said happily, "welcome to our home! Are you lost?"

The ghost stared at them. Hinata got up and hugged her.

"Awww... It's all right, dear," Hinata said with a smile, "ummm... Naruto! This is... A surprise!" She turned to Naruto. "This is...?"

She elbowed the woman. She cleared her throat, confused.

"Uh... Sadako," she managed softly.

Hinata nodded.

"Right! Sadako is a nice girl who... Lives in the tape," Hinata explained.

Naruto stiffened.

"She... Isn't a ghost, is she?" Naruto asked worriedly. Hinata rapidly shook her head, and poked Sadako in the small of her back.

"No! No, she isn't a ghost," Hinata said quickly, mindful of her husband's fear, "she just lives in a cassette tape!"

Naruto nodded.

"Ohhh... Well that's weird," he said. "Also, I'm glad we opted for the big screen given she had to fit through the screen."

Sadako... Blushed, and covered her ample assets. Hinata blushed... And then smiled.

"Well! Sadako, since you're out of the tape, how would you like to get acquainted with my husband and I?" She asked, wrapped an arm around her waist. Sadako's blush deepened.

"Er... Well... I was planning on killing you horribly, but uh..." She shook her head, "honestly, I don't think I can."

"Yeah, so why make war when we can make... Love?" Hinata asked with a wider smile.

Naruto raised a hand.

"Does that mean sex, Hinata-chan?"

"Yes it does," Hinata said happily.

"Sweet!"

"And that is why you have a half-demon-ghost sister who visits through the TV every so often," Naruto explained to Boruto... As a little girl with long black hair and bright blue eyes sat and hugged him on the floor of the living room.

"Big brother!" The little girl cried happily.

Boruto, as he had been doing so for the last ten minutes, continued to scream.

Because why limit Hinata's harem to one universe? The multiverse is canon to Naruto, after all.