Ramen Doodles
By Andrew J. Talon
Disclaimer: I do not and probably never will own Naruto or any other copyrighted works mentioned in this story. I am not writing this for profit.
An outgrowth of the Bad Naruto Fanfiction Tropes The Series thread, The Divided Continent is all about the Americas in the Post-Kaguya world and how they fared.
Much like the Elemental Continent, Kaguya's arrival caused mass destruction and chaos. All of the countries suffered heavily from impact events. The injection of chakra into the biosphere caused far more destruction. Florida sank and became an island chain. The Great Lakes flooded into one gigantic lake. Multiple major cities on both coasts were devastated. Still, mankind survived, and small pockets of civilization began to rebuild even in the chaos and ruin.
Then the Power, called chakra in what had been Asia, became known. It enhanced life, leading to supermen and women who became warlords. They fought over the remains of America, and a dark age of barbarism ensued for over a century.
Yet not all was lost. Enough scientific acumen and resources remained in a few connected cities to truly analyze the Power. A man named Tom Ripley founded a company to exploit it, and his discoveries gave normal men and women the ability to use the Power-Called Plasm and Tinctures.
This research also led to resurrection of the dead. Inspired by the mark on history left by such men, the four Presidents carved into Mount Rushmore were pulled from the afterlife and imbued with the Power to help restore the Republic!
Of these four men: George Washington, Thomas Jefferson, Abraham Lincoln and Theodore Roosevelt, it was decided to make Roosevelt the leader given his familiarity with the modern world and his war making ability. The others worked as support and to help rebuild the country.
Gathering chakra adepts to their side, bringing law and order to the country, the American republic was reborn through over a decade of blood and sweat. Warlords were deposed and brought to justice. Government by the people and for the people was restored. And while challenges remained, the country was more or less whole.
Tinctures and Plasm, converted from lightning rods and the ambient energy in the air, revolutionized every industry. And it allowed normal people the power of fire, ice, wind, water, lightning and other elements. To manage those who would use such powers irresponsibly, the United States Federal Rangers were established-Incredible combatants from across America chosen not just for their strength but also their character.
Roosevelt was properly elected by the people in a landslide, despite his Revenant nature, and decided to turn his attention to re-establishing contact with the outside world.
Canada was slowly recovering thanks to their own adepts of good character. Meso and South America were a tumult of chaos and revolution, save for a growing Aztec inspired empire and a Caribbean slowly being united under Power adept Buccaneers. Europe seemed to be a chaotic, feudal mess of God kings, wizards, warriors and knights, as was Africa. Russia was unknown.
Eastern Asia, however, had regained a fair amount of civilization despite being at the epicenter of Kaguya's descent (called the Starfall by most cultures as it had seemed like the sky had fallen on them for a time). Much of it was divided into five major nations, each named for a different element. Based on rumor and trade, President Roosevelt opted to make first contact with Hi no Kuni-Fire Country.
As part of their new trade relationship, Hi no Kuni and the United States would exchange teams of "chakra adepts" to learn about the other nation. Most of them young and inexperienced but eager to learn and have adventures.
And adventure Naruto and his friends will find for sure... On the Divided Continent.
The Divided Continent: Bill Peckos and Henrietta Johns
"Boy, I gotta tell ya! I dint don't believe it when the old guy back at them Mayor's office told me we were gonna be scolting honest to goodness Ninjas back to town but here we are!"
It had been a rather uneventful evening for Team 7, mostly just trying to keep their lunch in through the sea sickness. They were supposed to go in a diplomatic mission to stablish some connections with the people of the Divided Continent.
They were greeted in by a pair of agents from the government. Well technically speaking it was one agent, Bill Peckos and the black teenage girl who decided to stick with him due to some unspecified accident. He tried to express some distaste for the girl but he showed some appreciation for her too.
"I'm sorry for her, she's…energetic." Bill apologized to Kakashi as the girl continued to talk to his Genin.
"Nah, don't worry about that it's actually kind of assuring to know I'm not the only one who suffers like this." The Jounin said as he watched the knucklehead of the group interacting with her.
"By the way, I've heard about some…interesting reading material from back in your country…you wouldn't happen to…"
Kakashi put an arm around Peckos shoulder and gave him a thumps up as he showed his collection of Icha Icha novels.
"Got you covered fam."
The teenager's on the other hand, were watching this exchange in disgust.
"Can't believe we come all the way to another continent and he is more interested in exchanging dirty books…" Sakura said disapprovingly.
"You really can't expect much from him", Naruto said equally as disappointed.
"Oh so I'm not the only one, that's confortin'" The teenage assistant of the agent said.
"Yeah, sorry about this…uh…sorry I don't think you've told us your name" Sakura said.
"Ah, where ma manners! Name's Henrietta John, next president of the country!" The now named Henrietta said with a friendly tip of her hat. "Henry for ma's friends!"
"So is a President like being the Hokage?" Naruto asked confused.
"I guess? Are they suppose' to be the leader of the country and a leading example to all?"
"Yeah"
"Awesome! When I'm Hokage I'll invite you to the ceremony" Naruto said excitedly.
"And I'll invite you to the swearing in!"
Sakura could only look between the two of them and feel a pit down her stomach as she realized that there were now two of them.
"Alright, kiddos! Get your stuff and put on the horses, it's a long way to the White House and we begin first thing tomorrow!" Peckos said as he and Kakashi finished exchanging smut.
"Why the rush?" Naruto asked.
"Cause it's Tornado Hunting Season and you don't want to get caught in the middle of that."
Down in the desert, far away from the cities and the docks, was a house.
There wasn't anything terribly curious about this house, it was in fact fairly normal outside of it's place of residence. The inhabitants on the other hand were a much more curious bunch than before.
But the same couldn't be said by it's owner.
"My, my, you youngsters and your modern hairstyles!" the woman said with a bit of a laugh "Anymore messier and you'd remind me of The Scarecrow!"
Inside the house, Team 7 and the Agents were greeted cheerfully by the middle aged red hair woman that seemingly lived here all alone, Dorothy Gale.
She was a woman in the prime of her life who seemed to make friends easily judging by how she'd greeted them into her house.
Pecos was the one who had introduced them, a small pause through their journey through the lost continent.
"Wow, Granny! Have you really been in all these places!" Naruto asked excitedly as he saw the pictures hanged around the house, each featuring the woman in a different part of the world.
"Oh yes, I was quite the adventurer in my youth!" she said delighted at someone asking her about them.
"I'd say, I don't even recognize half these places…" Henrietta said overlooking the photos.
"Actually I think I recognize some of these…" Sakura said looking at the photo of Dorothy with two big statues in the background.
"Well I wouldn't mind telling you about them if you help me get everything ready for dinner" Doroty asked the trio of youths as she led them to the kitchen "Toto isn't exactly great with cooking…"
The aforementioned dog barked in response but went back to sleep shortly after.
With the 3 teens gone into the kitchen, that leaved the two adults and the dog alone in the living room.
"So an old friend huh..." Kakashi said to Pecos.
"She's…outgoing but she's a good woman and has always offered a place to stay whenever I'm around these parts" Bill said as he sat down on the sofa.
"I imagine…" Kakashi took one of the framed pictures, a black and white image of Dorothy standing in a beach "She sure has gone to a lot of places in a short time, because she looks the same in all these pictures."
"You noticed that too?" Bill said as Kakashi took a seat "Sometimes we don't see each other for years at a time, but everytime I comeback she and the house looks exactly the same."
"An illusion to hide her age?"
"Doesn't explain the dog, though" Pecos waved to the little black dog sleeping near them "That's the same dog she had when I saw her for the first time 10 years ago, even has the same exact chipped ear."
"You ever asked?"
"No, I don't want to put such a sweet lady on the spot like that." Pecos said lazily and he prepared to take a nap on the couch "Besides it's not like she's just gonna outright say it."
XxXxX
"Hey Granny! How come you look the same in all these photos?" Naruto outright asked putting the woman on the spot.
"Naruto!" Sakura chided.
"It's quite alright, dear" Dorothy said calming down the pinkette "Frankly I'm glad someone asked me already, that old cowboy never seems to say what's on his mind!"
"So what are you?" Henri asked.
"Why, I'm a witch of course!" Dorothy said as she whipped some cream over a pie.
By Quantum01.
Night in the desert was beautiful, but very cold. Especially as they headed away from the warmth of the urban areas.
Pecos had led them to a rooftop on the outskirts of town, overlooking a warehouse facility with very high walls. Pecos sighed, rummaging in his long duster coat.
"So, why are we here Pecos-san?" Naruto asked eagerly.
"Yeah, why the detour?" Henri inquired, just as impatient.
"Can't be helped," Pecos said, "it's a detour. Gotta take care of this warrant for an illegal smuggling operation, and I'm the only Agent available right now." Pecos pulled out some official looking papers, and read through them. He nodded. "Yup. To be served due to imminent threat."
"Ooh! A fight with real smugglers?!" Naruto gasped.
Henri grinned, just as eager.
"Yeah! I'm gonna take down twenty!" She cried.
"Nuh uh! I'll take down thirty!" Naruto argued. Henri scowled back.
"I'll take down fifty!"
"I'll take down more than both of you," Sasuke snorted.
"YOU WON'T!" Naruto and Henri shouted.
"None of you are going," Pecos stated firmly. His apprentice and Naruto looked disappointed, as did Sasuke-Though Sasuke showed it more maturely. Sakura looked relieved.
"None of you are authorized to fight, and none of you are stealthy enough for this," Pecos said, nodding to Kakashi, "save for Mister Kakashi. Who I have deputized."
"Happy to help out," Kakashi said with an eye smile.
"Just remember, keep it non lethal," Pecos said. "One of these guys will talk, and lead us to their boss."
"Happy to, actually," Kakashi replied, to which Pecos tipped his hat.
"But-But what if you need our help!" Naruto protested.
"You really could use us!" Henrietta added.
"If we need you, we'll call," Pecos said. He gave them a smile, before he pulled his red scarf up over his bearded face. "Promise!"
"But for now, just stay here and watch," Kakashi said. "Make sure no civilians get near."
Pecos turned and leaped off, using his power over the wind to glide like a silent owl. Kakashi leaped after him, keeping up just fine. They both vanished into the shadows around the warehouse, leaving their four students behind. Henrietta grumbled, sitting down on the rooftop and glaring out. Naruto joined her, pouting severely. Sasuke sighed, looking over the area and keeping an eye out for any civilians or other traffic. Sakura was flipping through a local guidebook the President had given her, written in Japanese.
"I hate this kiddie table crap!" Henri grumbled. "He's always treating me like a kid!"
"Yeah! We're not babies!" Naruto added. "I mean, we've fought crazy stuff back home!"
"Oh yeah, me too!" Henrietta said. "Like, once we fought this guy with a gigantic cyborg armor that looked like a rhino!"
"Wow! That's cool!" Naruto said cheerfully. "We once fought a guy who could turn into a gigantic sand racoon!"
"That sounds amazing!" Henrietta cried. "But not as cool as fighting a guy who raised an army of zombie dinosaurs! Like, we fought fifty Allosaurs! And twenty Tyrannosaurs! And like a hundred raptor things!"
"Big deal!" Naruto bragged. "I fought a guy who ruled an entire kingdom with chakra enhancing armor!"
"We did," Sasuke grunted.
"Okay, yeah, we did," Naruto amended. Henrietta snorted and looked back at Sakura, still engrossed in her book.
"Pinky there do anything?" Henri asked. Sakura scowled.
"Hey! I did plenty!" Sakura protested.
"Yeah! Sakura-chan's been a big help! I mean, she's part of the team!" Naruto said.
Sasuke snorted. Sakura drooped a bit. Henri looked back at the warehouse. Sasuke followed her, and he narrowed his eyes.
"Activity," Sasuke said. "Looks like they're trying to get some kind of cargo out."
Indeed, several men were moving a truck, while flashes of light and energy blasts began to emit from the warehouse interior. Henrietta stood up.
"We can't let those guys escape!" Henrietta cried. She pulled her large hammer off her back and spun it around with one hand, showing off her incredible strength. "We gotta go!"
"But Kakashi-sensei and Pecos-san said-" Sakura tried, but Sasuke was already standing up. Naruto grinned, and formed hand seals.
"Kage Bunshin no jutsu!" He cried, and twenty Narutos appeared on the roof top. "I'll just have these guys block the area off! So we can go in!"
"Great idea!" Henrietta said happily. "Come on! Let's go!"
"But Kakashi-sensei-!" Sakura tried again, but Naruto and Sasuke took off right after the older girl. Sakura sighed, and tucked the book away. She leaped after them.
Getting over the wall wasn't a problem. And Henri demonstrated her skills with her opening strike.
"REPENT YOUR SINS YOU BASTARDS!" Henri cried, her entire body crackling with lightning as she leaped high in the air. The men below looked up in shock, but had no time before she struck!
KRACKATHOOM! She unleashed the force of her hammer striking right in between them, as well as a pulse of lightning that sent every man around flying! She then hefted up her hammer and threw it right through the engine block of the truck trying to drive out the gates! SMASH!
A few men further away pulled guns and tried to open fire, but kunai from Naruto and Sasuke downed them. Naruto took out anyone else by sending his clones after them, and soon the warehouse yard was quiet. Sakura landed behind them, sighing as Henri and Naruto excitedly talked about how lame they were.
"Man, those guys sucked!" Henri said cheerfully.
"Yeah! Not even worth our time!" Naruto laughed. "We could have handled this on our own!"
"Yeah," Sasuke agreed, looking disappointed. Henri walked up to the back of the truck, summoning her hammer back just by holding out her hand. Naruto crowed-He still thought that was so cool.
"Glad you could join us, Pinky," Henri tossed back to Sakura. "Now, let's find out what these jerks were hauling!"
"Hang on, maybe we should get Kakash-sensei or Pecos-san first?" Sakura warned. "I mean, it could be-!"
Henri smashed the chains holding the doors shut, and wrenched them open. Sakura sighed.
"Or we can do that," Sakura muttered. Inside was a small, lizard-like creature. It walked up to them, curious. Sakura noticed there was a cage in the center of the trailer, one that had been wrenched open from the inside. She pulled out her guidebook and began flipping through it as Henri and Naruto examined the interior and the creature.
"Hey! What gives? All that's inside is this lizard thing," Naruto said.
"Is this what they were smuggling? Freaking lame!" Henri grumbled. "What kind of smugglers just ship a lizard?"
Sakura's eyes widened as she spotted a relevant passage and she looked up.
Naruto extended his hand to the little creature with a smile.
"Hey there buddy! Don't worry, I like toads and you're kind of like a toad-"
"NARUTO DON'T TOUCH IT!" Sakura screamed. Naruto looked back.
"What do you mean-OW!"
The creature's mouth had opened wide, and it had bit Naruto. It began to glow, as chakra was pulled out of the young blond boy. Naruto cried out in shock and waved his hand around... And then was unable to, as the creature went from the size of a house cat to the size of a buffalo in a matter of seconds. Henri and Sasuke grabbed him and yanked him away, as the now very large, very fearsome creature roared.
"KATON! Goukakyuu No Jutsu!" Sasuke shouted, and he unleashed a fireball right into the monsters' mouth. This proved to be a big mistake, as the creature swallowed the fireball, and got twice as big.
"It's a Cipactli!" Sakura cried. "It's a monster that eats chakra!"
The cipactli lashed out with a long tongue, like a toad's, and wrapped itself around Henri. She struggled as it drained her chakra, and she tried electrifying her hammer and whacking the creature's tongue!
"AH! AHH! LEGGO! LEGGO!" Henri cried. Naruto and Sasuke formed a Rasengan and a Chidori, respectively, but Sakura ran in and grabbed their arms.
"NO! DON'T FEED IT ANYMORE, IT'LL JUST GET STRONGER!" Sakura shouted. She pulled a kunai and stabbed the beast in the tongue, hard! The cipactli roared, and let go of Henri. The taller girl fell back, panting hard. The cipactli was now so big, it smashed through the trailer of the truck. The wound on its tongue healed in seconds, and it hissed.
"So what do we do?!" Henri shouted.
"Do you have any poisons?" Sakura asked.
"Why in the hell would I have any of those-?"
"THEN RUN AWAY!" Sakura bellowed, turning and fleeing. Naruto, Sasuke and Henri were soon right behind her as the massive chakra monster chased after them.
On the warehouse rooftop above, Pecos and Kakashi observed their students as they ran around the courtyard, the cipactli skittering after them like a hungry puppy after a treat.
"One day, Henri will learn to obey my orders," Pecos sighed. "At least, that's what I keep telling myself."
Kakashi chuckled.
"Same here," the ninja replied. "So, do you have a means of subduing that thing?"
"Cipactli? Sure, they're dumb as a box of rocks." Pecos pulled out a small, pink vial. "Toss them a vial of this here neurotoxin, they'll gobble it up and sleep long enough for all their chakra to dissipate."
"Oh good," Kakashi said with a nod. Pecos looked back down at Henri, Naruto, Sasuke and Sakura as they ran back across the courtyard, screaming, as the monster kept up the chase.
"So, you want to stop this right now or...?" Pecos asked. Kakashi shook his head.
"Not really. Then again, I am the guest and your deputy. If you'd like to save them right now, by all means."
"Hmmm," Pecos hummed as the monster roared and the children shrieked. "Well, I mean... It ain't like we gotta save them right away."
"It would be a good object lesson in why they should obey our orders," Kakashi contributed. Pecos nodded with a smile.
"Exactly my thinking," he said. "And folks said we wouldn't get along!"
"Eh, what do they know?" Kakashi asked, watching his students run back the other way as the cipactli kept chasing them.
By myself.