Captain Bluebeard: in position with First Mate. Commander, Quartermaster, all set?
Amber Bonny: in position. Great view from up here!
Calico Vick: in position, but can we talk about our codenames?
Captain Bluebeard: no we cant
Long Max Silver: what's wrong with your name?
Calico Vick: sounds dorky af
Long Max Silver: I like it
Amber Bonny: dude if you don't want a pirate name you don't join a pirate crew
Calico Vick: I didn't think you'd go that far with the pirate theme tbh, we're on a serious mission and it sounds like we're fooling around
Amber Bonny: youd rather have boring codenames like Alpha Bravo and Tango Charlie?
Calico Vick: something like that
Long Max Silver: I prefer pirate names
Amber Bonny: same
Amber Bonny: I mean, I don't see why we cant have a bit of fun while on our "serious mission"
Captain Bluebeard: look, were not gonna debate this all night! I'm the Captain of this ship, I decide the codenames, so suck it Quartermaster!
Calico Vick: I thought pirates had some kind of democracy?
Long Max Silver: I think your gonna lose if you want to vote, both Captain and Commander want to keep the pirate names
Calico Vick: but if you vote with me we're 2 vs 2
Long Max Silver: :o
Calico Vick: pretty please?
Amber Bonny: using girlfriend privileges is not fair!
Captain Bluebeard: and useless cuz as Captain my vote counts double
Calico Vick: what? Since when?
Captain Bluebeard: since I decided it
Calico Vick: you cant do that!
Captain Bluebeard: I do what I want on my ship
Amber Bonny: ok u guys, stfu, quarry sighted sailing our way!
Captain Bluebeard: Quartermaster?
Calico Vick: ready, wait for my signal
Calico Vick: but this conversation is not over!
Victoria sighed and put down on her phone. Then she looked through the window of her booth at Two Whales as the police cruiser approached on the rainy road and parked in front of the diner. Shortly after, Officer Berry pushed the door open and walked in. Just as Joyce had told them: Berry was on patrol with Officer Pulaski these days, and they would always stop by the Two Whales at 10 pm for coffee and donuts. Berry was always the one coming in to take the order while Pulaski stayed at the wheel to answer the radio in case of emergency. And Pulaski had a reputation for being rather hot-blooded, a couple times already he had taken off tires screeching in response to an emergency, leaving his partner stranded in the diner.
She frowned as she took a sip of her chocolate milkshake. Thinking about Joyce had made her reflect on the dinner she'd had at her house a couple hours earlier. A very weird dinner. After she'd taken a nap with Max in her coffin and done all sorts of things that made her blush just thinking about them, they'd cleaned up a bit and met Chloe and Rachel at Joyce and David's. And… the atmosphere had quickly taken a strange turn. Not because of the dinner itself: Joyce had done her best to make everyone comfortable, she'd cooked a delicious roast beef for herself, David and Victoria, and done some kind of soup with the cooking juices so the three vampires had something to eat too. But Max and Chloe had kept throwing each other odd looks and snide remarks all evening, acting like two pissed off cats for some reason she just couldn't understand. Nothing had happened between them, as far as she knew?
And then, over dessert, once they'd told them about their grand plan to get Berry's help to take down both Wells and Prescott, Joyce had made the mistake of asking the girls what they were planning to do once it was all over, once everyone was in jail and Chloe and Rachel were back into the world of the living. Finish school, and then what? College? Victoria's plan was to go to UCLA because they had the best photography curriculum of the west coast, and she had kind of expected Max to want to join her. Chloe and Rachel, on the other hand, were more into sticking around Arcadia Bay eventually, using their powers to make it a better place, or a "paradise" as Rachel put it, and they had kind of expected Max to want to join their Bat-Family. Needless to say, the poor freckled girl was very confused, torn between her friends and her girlfriend, which had done nothing to ease up the apparent tension between her and Chloe.
After dinner, they'd decided it was time to move on with Operation Bane Of Arcadia. The dossier was ready, and with Joyce's help they knew exactly where to find Berry and how to get him alone.
And that's why she was here now, sipping a milkshake at Two Whales and getting ready to play her part.
Berry was now at the counter, waiting for his order. Time to go. She took out her phone and typed:
Calico Vick: approaching quarry
Taking a deep breath, she finished her milkshake in one gulp and stood up, mustering her acting skills. And she was a good actress, she was even this close to playing Prospero in The Tempest three years ago, if only Chloe and Rachel didn't drug her… granted, she was the one who tried to drug Rachel in the first place, she only got hoist by her own petard.
Still, that was a bitchy move of them.
"Can I get another chocolate shake, Becky?" she asked the night waitress as she came to the counter and took the seat next to Berry.
"Sure," Becky said.
"Oh, hi Officer Berry!" she turned to him and flashed him her best smile. "I didn't see you there!"
"Miss Chase," the cop said with a polite nod, wondering what kind of trouble she was bringing this time. In the ABPD, Victoria Chase was known mostly for two things: throwing wildly illegal parties, and being too rich to be prosecuted for said parties.
"I haven't seen you in a while," she said, trying her best to sound bubbly and carefree. "What's up with the ABPD lately?"
Berry scoffed, and Victoria realized at that moment how tired he looked. Poor guy must have had a pretty rough day, and they were about to make his evening much more… interesting.
"You don't want to know, Miss Chase," he said somberly.
"Try me, I love to hear cop stories. So what kind of danger did you face lately, Andy?" she whispered with a wink as she innocently shifted closer and laid a hand on his forearm resting on the counter. He looked at her, surprised, and she knew the fish was hooked. Her smile broadened without her needing to force it. Good to know she hadn't lost one bit of her seductive power.
He smirked and said: "Cop life is not as glamorous as TV makes it look, Miss Chase. Trust me, in a town like this, most of the time, nothing happens while on patrol. And when things happen…" he sighed and shook his head.
"What?" she encouraged him.
"I just feel like this town is going crazy, that's all. We had a call from people saying their neighbors sounded like they were fighting. We showed up, the wife was locked up in the bathroom and the husband was trying to open the door with an axe, yelling at her because his steak was overcooked. Guy had no criminal record, no history of violence, nothing, and here, just like that, he snaps and goes Jack Torrance on his wife over a bad steak. We had a number of fights break out all over, people drunk like fishes throwing glasses at each other in a bar over a poker debt, two housewives clubbing each other with goddamn ketchup bottles at Lucky Aide over sales or something like that, they kept fighting and yelling at each other while their kids were watching until we showed up to calm them down. We even had a call from the Coast Guards, they said they had to rescue a fishing boat that was adrift in the bay. It was adrift because no-one was running it, those idiot fishermen were too busy trying to gut each other with their knives and hooks for some reason we haven't determined yet. This is the kind of stuff we see happen in a year at worst around it, and it all happened today!"
Victoria tried to come up with something to say, but she was so genuinely shocked that all that came out of her mouth was a whispered "Wow!"
"Yeah, and you know what I think?" Berry continued. "This… thing, that happened last night, you know, when every single electrical device in town went wild? I think it messed with people's heads too, how, I don't know, but I can feel it. They're acting like animals, you know, when they go crazy just before a big earthquake or something?"
Seeing how speechless and wide-eyed the young woman was, he sighed, shook his head and said:
"Nevermind, I didn't mean to scare you, Miss, don't pay attention to the ramblings of a tired cop. Oh, here's my order. Have a nice evening, Miss Chase!"
On these words, he picked up the two cups of coffee and the box of donuts and started walking toward the door. Victoria snapped out of her trance.
"Oh, wait!" she called him, making her voice as high and distressed as she could.
"Yes?" he asked as he came back to her. "Is there something you need to talk about?"
"I, um…" she stuttered as she picked up her phone and fired a rapid text.
Calico Vick: now!
Meanwhile, in the alley behind the Two Whales, Chloe was waiting, smoking a cigarette and taking the occasional swig from a can of PBR. Max was leaning on the opposite wall, her arms crossed, staring at a puddle at her feet.
"Now, Maximus," Chloe grumbled, "you gonna tell me what's going on or what?"
"Huh?" Max said, startled back to reality.
"Earth to Max! I was saying, you gonna tell me what's going on?"
"About what?"
"About that dinner, dude! The fuck was that pissy act?"
"I wasn't pissy!"
"You totally were."
"I was just defending myself, you were pissy!"
"I was pissy because you were!"
Max sighed and shook her head. "This is going nowhere," she mumbled.
"Then let's clear the room," Chloe said, moving closer to her friend. "If you're mad at me for something, just spill it, Maxi-pad."
"I'm not mad at you."
"So what's wrong?"
As Chloe approached, Max frowned and wrinkled her nose and stepped away, muttering in an accusing manner: "You smell like sex."
"Yeah," Chloe groaned to herself, looking at the brunette's back. "So do you."
At this moment, her phone buzzed, cutting off any further argument.
Calico Vick: now!
"Okay, talk later Mad Max, time for action. Ready to run?"
"Yeah," Max sighed joylessly. "Let's get this over with."
"I-I was wondering if you c-could help me with… something. I… I'm not feeling safe at the moment."
He frowned: "Someone threatening you, Miss Chase?"
"N-No, it's just… with all that's going on at the moment, you know… s-so I was wondering if you could offer me some sort of… protection?"
"Protection? Miss Chase, I'm sorry, but the police are not bodyguards, we cannot dispatch an agent to watch over you if you are not in real danger."
"Are you sure? I-I can pay!"
Berry let out a chortle and smiled gently at her: "That's not how it works, Miss Chase. I'm not that kind of cop."
"Oh."
Shit, she had another trick up her sleeve, but she really, really didn't want to use it.
Oh, well. Close your eyes and think of England.
But bitches better hurry!
"I…" she started, and slowly, with a faint smile and a deliberate swagger of the hips, she walked toward him and pulled close, so close she could feel his belt against her belly. She felt his body tense and attempt to withdraw, and she grabbed him by the collar to hold him, and started gently playing with it as she looked him in the eyes and purred:
"I have other ways to thank you for your time, Andy."
The cop grew beet red as he stared at her and skipped a breath, but he quickly recovered, smiled benevolently, softly pushed her hands off his collar, and murmured:
"I'm not that kind of cop either, Miss Chase."
Great, she thought. Wasn't humiliating enough to try and seduce a cop, he had to blow me off! Thanks! Oh, well… better than having him perv on me, I guess.
Thankfully, a shrill cry for help coming from outside saved her from her mortification.
"What was that?" she asked.
"I don't know," Berry said, startled, "but I have to check this out. Wait inside for your safety!"
And on these words, the cop put his order down on the nearest table and rushed out of the diner, just in time to see his cruiser take off, sirens wailing.
"Wait!" he shouted as he started running behind the car. "Wait for me, you idiot!"
Alas, Pulaski didn't notice him and had soon rocketed around a corner and out of his sight. Berry stopped and put his hands on his knees to catch his breath, then made his way back to the restaurant. What took him, he wondered. As he walked into the parking lot, he saw Victoria crouching, comforting another girl who was lying down on the pavement, looking pretty shaken.
"I thought I told you to wait outside!" he said moodily.
"I just took a peek," Victoria defended herself, "then I saw it was Max, I had to help her!"
Oh, so this other girl was Max Caulfield, he recognized her now. The last time he'd seen her, she wasn't into leather and black eyeliner. Kids these days have such strange fashion tastes…
"Are you alright, Miss Caulfield?" he asked her gently as he crouched by her side.
"Mm, yeah," she mumbled, "I guess… just a little, you know… shaken…"
"What happened?"
"I don't know, I was… in the alley, behind the diner, when someone jumped on me, I couldn't see who it was, they had a hoodie I think, but… they just threw me to the ground and stole my keys and then rushed to the parking lot to get my truck. I came to and try to run after them, but I was too late, and then I… I guess I kind of fainted?"
Berry sighed. That explained Pulaski's sudden departure: he'd seen the thief drive off with the truck and, impulsive as he was, decided to give chase without waiting for his partner. Well, since he was stranded here, he could at least take care of the victim.
"It's gonna be okay," he told her, "Pulaski's not very bright, but he's a good driver, I'm sure he'll catch up with our car thief in no time. Want me to help you inside? I think a cup of coffee could do you good. Then, when you feel better, I'll need you to make a statement, is that good for you?"
She nodded gratefully: "Yeah, thanks Officer Berry."
A couple minutes later, Max was sitting in a booth Victoria.
"Are you getting better?" Berry asked as he brought her a cup of hot coffee.
"Yeah, thanks," she smiled at him as she took the cup. Then, she jumped as a sudden realization crossed her mind, and started searching frantically into her messenger bag.
"Oh, shoot!" she moaned. "My camera! It's gone!"
"Gone?" Victoria asked. "Where could it be?"
"I dunno, I guess it must've fallen off my bag, in the alley… oh crap, I love that camera!"
"Hey, don't worry, I'm sure it's still there."
Then Victoria gave the cop the puppy eyes and asked with her sweetest voice:
"Officer Berry, would you mind taking a look?"
"Sure," the cop said.
Then once he had left the diner, Max and Victoria looked at each other with an impish smile on their faces, and giggled.
"The puppy eyes always work," Victoria said.
"You're so wicked!" Max snorted. "You make him dance to your tune!"
"I don't mean to brag but... I got to admit, I'm pretty good at this game."
"Yeah, totally not bragging. Man I wouldn't want to be in Berry's shoes right now. He's totally gonna shit his pants."
"You know, I keep thinking we could've come up with another way."
"Maybe, but Rachel insisted we do it with... what did she say again?"
"Panache, that's the word she used."
"Yeah. She really has a taste for the dramatic, doesn't she?"
Victoria rolled her eyes hard: "Oh my God, don't tell me about it! Girl's always been hella dramatic!"
Max giggled: "Did you just say hella?"
"What? No, I didn't."
"Oh, I heard that right, you totally did."
"I didn't!"
"We're a good bad influence on you, Tori!"
"Shut up!" Victoria ordered, but with an amused smile on her face. They laughed together at it, then Victoria asked:
"You think Pulaski's ever gonna catch up with Chloe?"
"With the way she drives? Not a chance!"
The alley was dark, and Berry had to use his flashlight to spot the Polaroid camera on the ground, next to a dumpster.
"Ah, there you are!" he said as he picked it up.
Then he gasped and dropped it, along with his flashlight, when he felt pulled up by an irresistible force. He only had time to feel his feet leave the ground, and before he understood what was going on, he was on his knees, panting, on a metal floor. He looked around him, confused: HVAC exhausts, and the neon sign of the Two Whales dominating him, shining its blue and yellow light around. The sign was very close to him, and it was backwards, so it could only mean… he was on the rooftop of the diner. How the hell?
"Officer Berry," a deep, groveling voice called, making the cop yelp and reach for his gun.
"I wouldn't do that if I were you," the voice said.
Berry looked where the sound seemed to come from and made out an imposing dark shape in the shadow of the diner's sign. He squinted: the dim electric light wouldn't allow him to see any details, just a general shape, the shape of…
His legs started to shake. This… no, this had to be a hallucination!
The shape seemed to be perched on a HVAC outlet and wrapped in a cape of what looked like thick black leather. Its head seemed to be covered in dark fur, and it had long, pointy ears. The head of a… but then, was it a cape, or was it wings? Because from what little he could distinguish, this thing did look like a bat of monstrous proportions! Yet, in spite of its imposing allure, the thing also had a strange, ethereal quality, like it was here without really being here. Berry took a moment to realize he had this sensation because the light from the neon behind the monster seemed to shine through it, somehow. And to add to the thing's otherworldly appearance, it had two glowing green eyes that looked like they were staring straight into his soul.
"What… the hell… are you…" he whispered in awe.
Then he mentally slapped himself for having, even for one second, entertained the possibility that he was talking to a real giant bat. It was a costume, obviously! With LEDs for eyes!
Which meant that now there were freaks hanging out on rooftops in bat suits.
Damn, that town was getting weirder and weirder…
"Don't worry about what I am," the thing said. "I'm a friend, it's all you need to know."
"My friends don't usually dress like that," he said, trying to sound sarcastic but the quiver in his voice betrayed his fear. "Tell me, why shouldn't I arrest you right now for assaulting a police officer?"
"Because I believe that as one of the few cops we can count on in this corrupt town, you will be most interested in my proposition."
"What proposition?"
"Look at your feet, Officer Berry."
Berry cast a quick glance down, making sure never to break eye contact with the freak for more than half a second. Those lunatics were unpredictable, after all.
At his feet was a thick kraft envelope.
"What is it?"
"See for yourself."
Warily, he slowly bent down to pick up the envelope, then took a couple steps back before he opened it. There were plenty of documents, email prints mostly, though it was hard to read them with what little light he had. But he could tell it was a very well-made dossier, it even included a table of contents, so whoever had made this had spent quite some time and effort on it.
"Okay, can you tell me what I'm looking at exactly?" he asked, his curiosity piqued.
"This dossier contains all the elements I have gathered regarding Raymond Wells, principal of Blackwell Academy, and his involvement with Mark Jefferson and Nathan Prescott in the Dark Room case."
Surprise hit him like a freight train. "Excuse me?" he blurted out.
"These elements are all taken from Wells's computer: emails exchanged with Sean Prescott, Nathan Prescott's secret file… based on these, we concluded that Wells knew about the Dark Room and Nathan Prescott's involvement with it, but didn't say anything about it."
"Wait, why would he do such a thing?"
"To protect himself and his position. Blackwell largely depends on the Prescott family's generous donations after all. It was easy for Sean Prescott to blackmail Wells."
"To protect his son, I guess."
"No. Because he's the ringleader."
"Wow, wow, wait a second, do you have any elements to support that?"
"Look for a picture among the files."
Berry did as instructed and soon found a Polaroid tucked between two sheets of paper. If only it wasn't too dark to see it… oh, wait! He remembered his phone, and quickly took it out to get some light. The picture showed a blonde girl talking to a tall, burly man. The girl looked scared, like a mouse facing a cat.
"This is Kate Marsh," the freak said, "a student at Blackwell and one of the Dark Room victims. The man is a cop, this photograph was taken as he was trying to bully her into withdrawing her complaint against Nathan."
Berry nodded: "Yeah, I know this guy, it's Joe Cochrane. He doesn't have a very good reputation at the station."
"Bent cop?"
"We've had suspicions for quite a while, he's even been under scrutiny a couple times, but so far he's always managed to come out pure as snow." Then he laughed as he added: "This drunkard got written up for showing up to work hungover yesterday!"
A moment of uneasy silence followed as Berry meditated on what he'd just heard from his strange new friend.
"Look," he said eventually, "I don't know who you are, but it looks like your heart is in the right place. So I'll be honest with you: Cochrane is a bent cop, I don't have a doubt about it personally. As for Sean Prescott, there's been rumors going on for a long time, about him having a number of guys at the station on his payroll, but I never believed them. I even volunteered to keep an eye on Nathan, as a favor for the old man. Thought I was doing the right thing... but then it all happened. First Chloe Price, then Mark Jefferson and that Dark Room thing... God, I've never seen anything so fucked up! Then I saw the way he defended himself, how hard he tried to sabotage the investigation... and I understood he had to have something to do with all this. so if you bring me evidence, I'm willing to look into it. I can't promise anything, but I'll try."
"I knew you were the right person for the job," the freak said, nodding.
"So what've you got for me?"
The freak sounded surprised: "What do you mean?"
"I need evidence, I just told you."
"You have your evidence! The email, the picture! It's obvious Prescott is blackmailing Wells, and who in town has enough money and influence to hire bent cops?"
"I hear you," Berry said, raising his hand in a gesture of appeasement. "But these are only clues, they don't prove anything! This picture only shows Cochrane bullying a student, it doesn't tell the reason why or who asked him to do this. As for Wells, from what you told me, you can prove Prescott is blackmailing him, but does he, at any point, acknowledges anything about his involvement with the Dark Room?"
The freak huffed, its attitude showing obvious disappointment.
"That's what I thought," Berry continued, "Besides, I assume you didn't ask for Wells's permission to search his computer?"
The freak's silent was good enough an answer.
"In this case, all these pieces have been obtained illegally and are therefore useless in court."
"But there must be something you can do!" the freak barked with impatience.
"Based on what you're telling me, best thing I can do at this stage is confront Wells. He's not known to be a particularly tough guy, so bluffing about the elements I got against him could be enough to get a confession out of him. However…"
"What?"
"Even if he knew all along about Sean Prescott and his connection to the Dark Room, I doubt he'd tell on him. The man has influence, believe me. Probably more than us. Wells, like anyone else in their right mind in this town, is probably more afraid of Prescott than he is of the police."
The freak let out something that sounded like a chortle: "Then I'll have to come up with something he fears more than Prescott. I can handle that. So if I send you a confession video, will you be able to use it?"
"I… may, but I'm not certain. Prescott could still leverage his influence with the police and the mayor, not to mention his army of lawyers, to bury the case."
"What about the press? If Wells's confession comes out publicly, surely it won't be buried that easily?"
"You can try, but you'll have to find a reporter who's brave enough to help you with it."
"Don't worry about that. I have an idea. So I get Wells's confession out and published, and we can bust Prescott, is that right?"
"I can't guarantee anything, but at least we'll have a weapon against him."
"That will do for now. Thanks, Officer. We keep in touch."
"Wait!" he called out as the freak began to rise. "Just wanted to tell you… I never liked the idea of costumed vigilantes roaming around town. But this case... as I told you, it's the most messed up case I've ever had to work on, and the idea that the real culprits could evade prosecution makes me sick. So… I appreciate what you're trying to do, whoever you are or whatever your reasons. You can count on me."
The freak nodded its monstrous head. "Noted," it just said.
"So, how can I contact you?"
"You don't need to, I will."
"Okay, and do you at least have a name?"
The freak huffed, and growled: "I'm Batman."
Then it jumped ten feet into the air, spread its enormous wings, and disappeared into the night sky under the policeman's bewildered gaze.
"I knew you'd say that," he whispered.
What a town of freaks! And to think he was going to work with one of them! Maybe he was kind of a freak too...
Now, he had a dossier to study, but first... how was he gonna get down from here?