24th Sun's Dusk… 1250…
She was faintly aware of how close they were.
Her hands and knees were planted on the cold stone of the tower floor, but she felt only pain that racked her body. She breathed in the dank, cold air of the room and tasted her own blood.
Their bodies were close enough to smell. She could hear the heartbeat of the werewolf and the shifting of the vampire's leather armor.
Every single thing, it all seemed like it had happened before. The odd sense she was reliving something she had already done. The wolf howling in her mind seemed familiar with its message. This time it wasn't agitated, but the message was a warning.
Her breath hitched in her throat as she struggled to grasp the world surrounding her.
She had lost control.
The coldness lingered with the fog of her nightmares. She felt empty inside of herself not knowing what had transpired. What have I done? What did you do? Only pain-filled silence answered her. The coldness lingered. The darkness in her mind pushed at her with a passive force. Seconds ticked by to minutes, leaving only the agonizing void in their wake. She closed her eyes and took a deep, long breath.
Aela glanced at Serana, only to receive the most minor shrug in return. Both had watched the young dragon fall from the sofa to the floor, struggling with an invisible foe. Both had listened to her screams for the last hour. Neither had been able to wake her nor had they been able to console her. Both wore their concern clearly on their faces.
Aela's own unease coupled with her worry made her make her move. She leaned down and reached for Ahziial. "Ahziial…" Aela started gently.
"Don't call me that!" Azriel snarled back, swatting her hand away. "Don't ever call me that again!"
Aela withdrew her hand, stunned. "Forgive me, I was…"
Azriel sighed deeply and rocked back onto her heels. "I hate my name. It reminds me of my life and of things you'll never understand. So just call me Azriel."
Serana and Aela shared another worried look.
Aela made to speak again, but Serana beat her to it. "Azriel, you were dreaming… we tried to wake you, but it didn't work."
Azriel rubbed the back of her head and gathered herself before standing. She felt horrible. Her body ached and she felt punch-drunk. She pulled herself to her feet, turning to face them fully when her eyes landed on the floor behind them. Her skooma bottles lay desecrated on the stone, pulverized to shards. Azriel took a step back, shocked.
Aela cleared her throat. "That part wasn't a dream."
Azriel's eyes lingered on the broken bottles for a few seconds before she slowly worked her way back up to meet Aela's gaze.
"Azriel…" Serana spoke as softly as she could to break the two wolves' stares.
Azriel's golden orbs shifted to her.
"…we know why you used it. The past is the past, you need to leave it there." Serana shifted slightly under the aurelian scrutiny. "This thing, whatever you've done to yourself, is the problem. Not the drug."
Azriel stood stock-still.
Aela waited for several seconds as the tension in the large tower built. Finally she'd had enough. "We saw your dreams. We know why you did it."
Azriel's eyes flittered to her.
Aela wondered how it was possible for her to stand so impossibly still. "You showed us."
Azriel swallowed slowly then blinked. Other than that, she was immobile.
Serana rubbed her temples. "Azriel, we know the Khajiit gave you the drug. We know you have terrible nightmares. We both understand now why you use it." It occurred to her how selfish it seemed that the entire reason they were standing there was because of her. Azriel's lack of sleep, injuries, and everything that had taken place thus far was entirely because of Serana herself. Yet, even now as the three of them stood there she couldn't contain her anxiety. But, they needed Azriel's help to open the small vault they had found. Serana watched Azriel carefully to gauge her as she continued. "You gave us insight into your past and neither of us…" Serana threw Aela a knowing look, "…fault you for what you have done."
A look of disbelief crossed Azriel's face as she regarded the two women.
"Azriel, had I have known before what I know now, I would have never put you in chains. I thought you had a disease, an addiction like the rest who use skooma. I didn't understand and to be honest, I wouldn't have listened." Aela let her hands rest on her hips as she toed the floor. She could feel the heat in her cheeks. An apology never came easy, nor was she the type to apologize usually.
"You're not going to hit me again?" Azriel murmured the words weakly.
Aela looked up at her. "No. And I shouldn't have before either." She watched as Azriel visibly relaxed. Serana caught her attention with a subtle movement. "This addiction to the feelings you get from the skooma is going to be as difficult to get over as the last time, but we both are going to help you. We understand you have nightmares and your desire to be rid of them."
Azriel shifted uncomfortably, but said nothing.
"We're both here for you and Aela's right. We're going to do everything we can to help you." Serana added quietly, stroking Azriel's arm.
Azriel simply nodded.
Aela decided they needed to change the subject. They'd have to figure out how to do it later. For now they had other pressing issues and anything to change the awkwardness in the room would be more pleasant than how she was currently feeling. "Azriel, we need your help." Azriel looked up at Aela and Aela quickly continued. "While you slept, we found a small vault behind the bookshelf. Neither of us can access it though."
Azriel's expression instantly changed and Aela could see almost relief cross her face.
The three quickly walked to the small niche room full of ruined books on the shelves. Other books were surprisingly intact and Azriel inspected them closer noting the enchantments on them to protect them from time and the elements.
Azriel bent down and studied the small wall vault. She tucked her hair behind her ears as she examined the lock. Pulling her lock picks from her ruck sack, she mumbled to the pair to remain quiet as she worked. She focused her hearing on the lock, listening to each key pin click into place. That was almost too easy… Azriel heard a small pop just as the door cracked open. She quickly turned to the two. "FUS!"
Serana and Aela were knocked clear as the small vault door sprang fully open and sprayed acid over Azriel.
Serana landed on her feet, hearing Azriel's pained cry. She raced back to Azriel's side in a blink as Azriel dropped to the floor, cradling her arm and head. Serana skid in front of Azriel on her knees. She tenderly pulled her hands from her face and inspected Azriel thoroughly. Blisters had instantly formed on Azriel's left hand, arm and the left side of her face. Even though the blisters would be painful, Serana breathed a sigh of relief. The acid had degraded over time and wouldn't permanently damage Azriel's skin. "Do you have any healing potion?"
Azriel nodded as tears slipped down her cheeks. Serana slipped her hand into Azriel's bag and pulled out the tonic. With the second dip of her hand she pulled a small rag from the depths. It took a few minutes for her to attend to the blisters. "It will take a couple of days for those to heal, but that potion will help."
Azriel nodded, standing up. She retrieved a small notebook from the vault and without a word or a look at the contents, handed it to Serana.
27th Last Seed
Harkon's shortsightedness is becoming a serious problem. I've warned him time and time again that his foolish prophecy would cast far too much light on our people and yet he refuses to so much listen to a word I say. I've become less a wife and more of an annoyance in his eyes. Devoting attention to my work is the only solace I can find while enduring his ridiculous crusade.
28th Last Seed
I've had a breakthrough today. I was able to attune the portal vessel to the Soul Cairn properly by using a small sample of ingredients.
Although the portal opened only for a few seconds, I'm confident that with the proper formula, it can be sustained indefinitely. I feel like I'm missing a key ingredient, something of sufficient potency that can resist the forces trying to prevent my intrusion. Communing with the Ideal Masters has proved worthless. They speak in riddles and offer no assistance whether I ensure them a steady supply of souls or not. If I'm to escape Harkon's clutches, I need to keep the portal open long enough to carry me away from here... forever if need be.
3rd Hearthfire
I've done it!
After wasting thousands of gold coins on components, I've discovered how to sustain the portal. I'm listing the components below without the proper amounts for my own protection. As a secondary precaution, I am combining my own blood into the formula which should prevent anyone from being able to duplicate it and following me into the Soul Cairn.
~The formula consists of~
Finely Ground Bone Meal
Purified Void Salt
Black Soul gem shards
Using the proper measurements, place above in the silver-lined portal vessel and add blood as a reactive agent. I will make my way into the Soul Cairn tomorrow after I gather my things and prepare for a potentially lengthy exile. More importantly, I must enact my plans with Serana, and get her to Dimhollow Crypt as soon as possible.
"FOREVER IF NEED BE?!" Serana yelled in frustration.
Aela tried calming the vampire as she slammed the journal close.
"How could she not tell me that?"
Aela watched Serana seethe with anger. "It sounds like she was trying to protect you…"
"You don't know my mother, Aela." Serana snapped back at her.
Aela shrugged. "You're right, I don't. But, just finish reading it to see where she went."
Aela looked up to watch Azriel walk the upper part of the tower in silence.
Serana mumbled several curse words together rapidly as she cracked the journal back open.
Aela smirked and waited for the vampire to say something important.
"The Soul Cairn…" Serana closed the journal and threw it on the alchemy table after a couple more minutes.
Aela stared at her waiting for clarification.
Serana sighed. "The Soul Cairn is a plane of Oblivion. She's hiding out there. We need finely ground bone meal, purified void salts, and black soul gem shards to open a portal…"
"Sounds simple enough." Aela added, finally comprehending her meaning. A sense of unease filled her gut and her wolf started to pace within her.
"Oh, did I forget to mention the fourth ingredient?"
Aela just looked at her. "No, only three…"
Serana rolled her eyes. "We need my mother's blood. Which of course if we could get, then we wouldn't be searching for her." She let the frustration pour out with each word.
Aela stood for a moment thinking and Serana leaned against the table.
"This is fucking pointless." Serana growled quietly.
"You know, you share your mother's blood." Aela looked at her with a soft smile.
A look of realization crossed Serana's face. "You're right, even now we still share blood in a way…" Her voice trailed off.
"Then you can use yours in place of hers."
Serana leaned forward and kissed Aela quickly on the lips. She looked up to where Azriel haunted the upper portion of the laboratory. She was about to speak when Aela interrupted her.
"Don't bother. Azriel might be impressive when it comes to smithing or enchanting, but she's absolutely useless with alchemy. She can't tell the difference between Wolf's Bane and Celery. I'll help you look for the other ingredients."
The two split up searching for the ingredients they needed. After several minutes Aela walked to the balcony where Serana stood waiting. "I have the Void Salts."
Serana gave a weak smile. "I found the bone meal, but I didn't see any soul gem shards."
Azriel walked up next to them. "That's because there aren't any. But, there are two black soul gems. We just need to break one." She looked at Aela with mock hurt. "And I can tell the difference between Celery and Wolf's Bane. I just don't care for alchemy." Azriel handed one of the soul gems to Serana, who crushed it over the basin. "It's like cooking and I hate cooking."
She looked at the werewolves with concern. "Maybe you both should step back. I don't know what's going to happen when I add my blood to this." Serana pointed at the door at the far end of the room. "Go stand next to the outer balcony door. If anything terrible happens you can escape."
"Not a chance, sister. We're not leaving your side." Aela instantly retorted.
Serana smirked, knowing full well that both Aela and Azriel were just as concerned. "Suit yourself."
Serana bit into her wrist and let her blood drip into the silver bowl. The vessel began to glow a bright blue. The stone floor of the lower part of the tower began to shake and blue light emanated from the carved circles in the floor. The air became static, the charge danced across their skin as the blue light filled the room.
"By the blood of my ancestors! She actually did it!" Serana's voice was barely audible over the din of the stones as they shifted forming a staircase in the electrical vortex. The three watched as the last stone slid into place.
"Shall we go and find your mother?" Aela asked over the crackling noise.
Serana nodded as she stared at the portal and Aela turned, walking down the stairs first, followed by Azriel then Serana.
Electricity arched over the pair as they reached the vortex and both women let out a pained shriek. Serana grabbed them and drug them back up the stairs.
"Are you okay?" She held them both to the floor, looking alternatively from Aela to Azriel.
Aela groaned in response and Azriel simply nodded.
"I'm going to guess that that hurt."
Azriel nodded again and Aela followed suit. Serana let them go and stood up offering both of them a hand. "I should have thought of this before I let you both walk down there."
"What do you mean?" Aela stood shakily, thankful for Serana's support.
"The Soul Cairn… is, well… hungry for souls." Serana said thoughtfully. "The Soul Cairn is a sliver of Oblivion and the Ideal Masters are only interested in souls so it makes sense that you just can't walk in. You two walked down there and the Soul Cairn… well… it tried to feed on you."
Aela rubbed her cheek, still feeling weak in the knees. She glanced at Azriel who was fairing much better but still leaning on the railing. "We're not snacks. How do we enter without being fed on?"
Serana regarded her for a moment in silence.
"The portal is trying to take your life essence as payment." Serana said quietly, helping Aela to the railing next to Azriel.
"So there's no way for us to go in?" Azriel asked.
Neither Serana nor Aela missed that her voice reflected the pain she was actually in. Serana contemplated the question in silence as the two women recovered.
"There might be. But, I don't think either of you are going to like it."
Azriel rolled her eyes. "Just spit it out."
Serana sighed she should have expected that answer. "Vampires aren't counted among the living…"
Aela gave her a sharp look. "Are you saying we need to become vampires to walk through that portal with you?"
Serana opened her mouth, but Azriel beat her to an answer. "That's exactly what's she's saying."
"Yes and no." Serana quickly added, seeing Aela becoming angry. "There might be another way to pay the toll."
"Which is what?" Aela growled at her.
"I could partially soul trap you both and…"
Azriel interrupted her. "Except we only have one black soul gem and you can't squeeze two souls into it."
Serana groaned as Aela's snarl deepened.
Azriel pushed herself off the rail. "Soul trap me. I'll go with you. Aela can stay here and guard this side of the portal."
"I am not a guard dog, Dragonborn." Aela snapped at Azriel.
Azriel clenched the soul gem tightly and growled back at Aela harshly. Her wolf barked in the back of her mind asserting its dominance. "And you aren't holding the soul gem. So you either guard the portal on this side or you let her change you."
Serana bit her lip. She knew Aela would never willingly become a vampire.
Aela slammed her hand into the railing. "Fine. I'll stay here. But, you both had better come back in one piece."
Azriel withdrew her glare from Aela and looked to Serana. "Do it."
Serana bobbed her head in ascent. "I'll try to make this as painless as possible."
Aela stormed away from the two, heading to the balcony door leading outside. Serana cast the spell as the door to the balcony slammed shut. Azriel felt her knees go weak for the second time in five minutes. The room around her began to swim and her knees gave. Then next thing she knew, Serana was helping her back to her feet.
"You're going to feel a lot weaker in there."
Azriel studied the twin smoldering fires which burned with concern. "I'll be fine." The words no more than left her mouth, when she realized she wasn't going to be. She felt like absolute garbage before letting Serana soul trap her. Now, she felt like if Serana let go of her she would topple over.
"Azriel, are you sure about this?" Serana helped her to the railing and Azriel was already starting to sweat.
Azriel forced a smile. "What could possibly go wrong?"
Sorry everyone... work has been busy and I've just plain got things to do. I hope you enjoyed it. Please feel free to let me know what you think of this chapter.