Chapter XII: A Very Special and Important Anti-Racism UNIT Chapter
The Dcotor and Raz and K-9 were in the TARDIS and the doctor and k-9 were playing Fortnie when all of a sudden Raz walked in and asaid – Het what are you two fuckers doin in here?
The Doctor said – We'e playing fortnire Raz, want to play?
Raze said – No thanks, I'm too cool for that shit.
Then K-9 said – Of course you would say that, you are w oman after all. Woman don't understand video games and cpomplex stuff anyway bcaue they brains are to small to understand it.
The Doctor said – K-9! That isn't nirce!
K-9 said – Sometimes the nice thing isn't the right thing and the truth is sually mean. If you sound like a jerk than you 're probably saying the truh. Plus you don't want to be a paort fo the SJW, do you Doctor?
The Do tor said – No, I don't. You're right woman are bad.
Raz was mad and so she walked up and kicked K-9 and said – Fuck you uou little dog bith!
The Doctor said – That was not needed, Raz, but you're also awesome aso I'll let it go.
Raz said – Good. You want to sax now?
The Doctor said – Oh do I ever! K-9, you keep playog I'll be back.
So then the Doctor and Raz left to have sax and K-9 said to himself – Why is it girls like that never want to sax me? I'm kind and curteious and chivalrous and smart and stuff, and yet it doesn't matter. No one cares tht I'm a good boy; all they eant is a bad dog who's handsome and will leave them in a week and be abusive and stuff. Well all of throse woman will see when they're in their fourtys with some kids and no husband and I'm going great. They'll vomr crawling back to me then, begggin g me to take them in, and I won't. because a good boy doesn't nred no slat.
Meanwhile, the Doctor and Raz ahd fun baving sax and stuff in bad and the Dictor siaid – Oh Raz you is my favourite companion ever!
Raz said – I'm the only one you've ever saxed with too!
The Dictor said – Sure!
(He said this because he didn't want to hurt Raz's feelings because she's frickin awesome but he actually cnaonocnialyl also has saxed RRiver and Claudia and Benni and ramona and James even though he isn't guy.)
When they were done again, Raz said – You no doctor, I think I should do some work. I havne't done much poilice work in a while and I don't want to be a like a stupid character who is a police person but never does police person stuff.
The doctor said – Oh yeaht hat wold be terrible and stupid and garbage.
(For snyone who dosen't get that: I'm making fun fo FUCKINGG CHIBNALALA. HE MADE YAZ A POLCIE WONAN AND THEN SHE NEVER DID POLICE PERSON STUFF AMI PAND DID MORE POLICE WORK AS A STRIPER IN THE ELEPHANT HOUR THAM YAZ DID IN SERIES 11 OR 12!)
So then they went back to where K-9 was and found he was now playing Silent Holl because he liked he analogy it had about how circusmision is bad because he was a dog an dogs get neutered a lot and he had been neutered even though he was a robto dog and he still remaindered that it had happened and it had caused bad trama and stuff. The Docror said – Hey K-9 were voing to go back to London so Raz can do sonme police stuff, sound good?
K-9 said – I don't fuckin care what you do I want to stay here and do this and shit.
The odoctor and Raz said – Okat have fun K-9!
Then they walked out of the TARDIS after they had flown it to London, and walked to the police place . Raz walked in and said – Hello I am officer Raz, and this is my friend the Doctor. I have been traveling with him for a while and so havne't been a bel to come to work.
The police secretary officer said – Oh oaky that maykes sense . Your office is stillw here you left it.
Raz said – Fuckin yeah! Thanks!
Then they went to Raz's office and got all her guns and outfits and tasers and batons and knives and stuff and then they went out on opolcie patrol after thr doctor was given a special Honorary Officer Doctor badge. While cruising around in Raz's police car, the Doctor said – You no I think I will probably not be able ot stop the regnernation into a women because some people don't think it can be stopped and that its ineveitbale that I'll be jodi and that that'll always be the ofifical version of my life.
Raz said – That's fuckin dumb. Those people are the Sjws and abd and not smart an stuff and so don't listen tot hem.
The Doctor said – okay you are right I wo't listen to them.
Then they went and ran ove r three homeless people for being evil crminals by breaking th3 rules by being homeless. Then the went back to the police office and Raz said by and they left. While walkin g abk to the TARDIS, they saw something that stopped them though. The Doctor said – Oh fuckin shite Raz! Over theire! It's motherfrickin UNIT!
Raz said – UNIT? That is so cool UNIT is aweodme!
The Doctor and Rsx walked over tie here UNIT Was and the Docotr said – UNIT! How are you, you fuckin military absterds?!
The Brigadier walked up and said – We're good, godoctr.
The Dcotor said – Oh Brigadier Katy! It's so cool to se you again!
Raz said – Oh I've heard of you youre cool and shit.
The Doctor said – Anywaty, what are you guys doing now?
Brigadier Katy said – Well usually we fight and kill alien bad guys like you no, but right now we're focusing on killing Paciztany people for the government.
Raz said – WHAT?! WHY THE FUCK ARE YOU DOING THAT?!
Raz was shocked and ofrrifed cause she was white but new lots of paciztany people and didn't think they were bad and stuff. Brigsadier Katy said – Well they're bad and odn't listen tot eh SJWs and don't do what we want!
The Doctor wsas hrroifed to hear that Katy was an part of the SJWs and said – No! Not you too Brigadier Karty! You were the daughter of my best friend who hated the fuckin SJW helper epole! How could you have done this awfulness?!
The Brigdaider Kay said – Well the government wanted us to and even though I am not a real part of the SJWs I have to do what those fuckin asshole bichs in Downing street tell me to do.
Raz new that killing paciztany people was bad, and she was horrified tha tit was happening. That was just not right and she new she shouldn't be surprised that the supposedlt tolerant SJw group ould be racist and murdering and stuff, but it still surpsieed her a bit. Because racism is bad, and the SJWs had never realized that like she had. But then she had a great awesome genius idea and said – Well what if we just start hunting down and shooting and killing Krotons instead of Paciztany people? Would that be okay with the government?
Brigadier Katy thought then said – Yes, it probably wood. Let's do that then! Thank you Razor Awsome you are so fucking awesome and saxy and I wish I could kiss you if I was Lisbon but I'm not Lisbon so I wont.
Then Raz said – Okay all you UNIT people, come and foollw me! Today we kill some fuckin Krotons!
With hat and acheer from UNIT and the Dotor and Katy and Yaz, Raz led UNIT away and towards the Krotons saving all the Paciztany people of London who were still alive. When they finally found some Krotons mugging someone in an alley, Raz yelled – FUCKING SHOOT THEMMM! SHOOT THEM AALLLL!
With that the UNIT and Katy and the Docotr began shoorignt there guns and sonic guns and the Docotr yelled – I'm the motheruckfing Doctor, you alien fuckers! And this! ISS! UNIT!
Those were the last words the Krotons heard cause right afte that the bullets form the guns all fle w into ehm like a wall of metal bullets, and went straight through them and through their brains like bullets. Then they fell over dead because Krotons are not strong and cannot rrgenrate. After this everyone cheered and clapped and Raz said – Okay now lets go and find the rest of these alien fuckers!
UNIT cheered and then all of the people there went and got a dpsce ship and travled to the Kroton's home planet Kroatia, then they wwenr and blew up all of Kroatia to stop the Krotons from libing anymore or killin h people. Then they flew back to London and had a party. At the end the Doctor and Raz and Yaz decided to leave, so the Brigadier and Assgood came and said – OOOO thank you so much Dictor and Raz dor saving us and kelping us wipe out the whole Krotons! We will always remember you and wait for you too come back when next there I s an alien problem! Thank you and bye!
Then Raz and the Doctor said – Okay bye
Then they went back to the TARDIS and found K-9 playing Grrand theft audio, and said – Have yo been playing video games thew hole time K-9?
K-9 aaid – I have but why do you care its my life you fuckin nosey people!
Then he kept lplaying nd the Doctor nd Raz laughed at how funny and silly K-9 was. Then they wentand had more sax and listened to Maenad Veyl Body Count and waited for their next adventure.