Chapter 16: The Sad Tale of Joh Grant
A few years after the Third Doctor and Brigadier had the conversation about the stuff, the Doctor sadly left is fridn Joh Grant wand said goodbye but didn't really say goodbye he just snuck out. This left Joh to live with the ugy she was left with and, a few years after that, she found hrrself in the hous aline and decided to think about her lfe cooices and the choixes made for her. She said – I so so so so SO badly wish the Doctor hadn't abandoned me with the SJW feminsims global warning guy who fucking terrible to me and shit. He is ab d and such SJW and hsitty ndd I hate him and now we just fuckin fight worms and shit and mutated worms mainly as well as some stupid plastic men sometimes. Its garbage and I hate it and fele smothered nand now we have a jid and his isn't was I wanted for y life. I was nobody speicla until I went and worked at UNIT and the Doctor helped me. But the doctor gave me a pourpsiose and stuff to do in my life and with my life and made me feel smart and spelical and brave ansd fucking shit like that and then he just fiucing abandoned me? Just lietf me with a prcactial strage rand never cam e macbk to see how I was offing? Never came to see if maybe the relaironship wasn't what I wanted/? Never even thought ot come by for dinner so me day ro something? No, he didn't. BECAUSE THE DOCTOR DIDN'T FUCKING CARE ABOUT ME. Its hard for me to accept because it's a brrorbibel dia that the man who meant most to em in world didn't even fucking car ewho I was or anything about me, but its true. He change dmy laife and gave me a new one and then anboande dme and now I am stufck here in a liceless marriag that I hate with a ew son who I don't want or care about even though I no I should, but id ont because he is the produc relationshipop I never wanted that was forced upon me. And so now my future eois basilllay done and I cant do anything with life and am stuck here and newill never have a pruposr har I care about again. This is all that is left for me. And I FUIING HATE THAT. I CAN'T FUCLING STANDIT. I CANT LIKVE LIKE THIS. I-
At this point Joh broke off, because hse was aciad of where eshe was headed. Where her brianw as headed was not a good place, she didn't' think. But she new that something wa going to have to change. She couldn't keep going like this. She… she wanted to check on something. She wanted to check on the gun she had stashed. Not for any reason, bot because ehw ews going to do sioemthing drastic, no, nut just to see if it waa still there. I f it still worked. Just incase she ever needed it for any eeason. She said – Who nose, maybe the Maseer will come here one day and I will have to shoot him. Got to be ready Joh.
SO then ths ewent to the secret hiding place in her study whete she had the gun hifddn, h eone hsed had eith her when shed left UNIT, nd when she looked at it, a rush of adrenile came over her. Even tough she really wasn't going to do anything with it. Piking it up, she looked around the room even though she new she was alone, but just to make sure she wally waa, and then she inspectedit. Checking the saefety she saw it was on. And then, just because she felt like it, she turned the safety off. Then she looked in to see if there was any bullets int it. Chekicng she saw there was in fat still one round in the gun. For a second she delibrated whertehr she ssouldn but the safety back on it,but decided she didn't' fele ike doing that right now. Naybe in a minute, but not right shis second. After all, she had plenty of time. It wasn'r like she was rlally foing snyhing with the gun, ust plooking at it. Suddnely she was blindsided by the thought of taking the gun and just shooting her hsuabdn wit hit. Just as soon as he walked in the door tonight waiting there for hima dnt en as soon as he said – Honey I'm home!
BLAMM! She'd shoot him and hed flal over just crimple dead. It was a hrroibel though and she was disguisted that she'd had it, wnodneirng what oucld hae possibly come over her, but at the same time a small part of he r new that she actually sort of wanted ot do that. It would certainly spovle her problem. No more husband and shed nbe free to go back to tlive rraveling. Except for the fact that her son aas still around. And she new that even though she wanted ot sescape this life ad could imagine killing her husband she couldn't even fathom the conscept of killing her son. Not that eshe could ever really kill her husband eiter, she realiesd, thinking about it was the farthest hse could go. No, there really was no escape for her. None at all. Adrer a moment, she was ovcrome by an urge. An ruge she new was logically a bad choice, but s o strongly wanted ot do anytway that she decided to ipush logic and resonnad stefy to the side for just a moment and them, slow,y, careflyll,t she plaed the barrel of the gun agoist the front of her forehead. She wasn't being suicidal or anything, no, she wasn;t going that far, but she new that just the thought of death being a posisbilty, foa single movement of her finger on a tiny metal trigger being all that separated her form life and death, would five her the biggest rush of ardrenielne shed' felt in tears. Ina ll the years soince he'd left her here, in this fucking shit cottage with this fucking fithitty man how she fucking hated so fucking much but stil new that she dould enver, enver bring herself to marh because tat just wasn't who she was. That just wasn't how Joh Grant was, no. And so instead she uust hel everyhin in all these years and suffered through it and now, nowq with this gun placed against her forehead she finally felt somethina gain. Finally fel the rshh, the thrill fo danger. It was all she'd ever wanted. But already the rush was fading, already ralirt crept back in a nd ralrest she new tha t her situation was just a shoepelss as it had alrways been. Her life was s o shitty that holding a gunt o her head wast he only way she could feel anything, and that was horrible. That was quite orobabyl the worst fuciing thing joho Grant had ever thought about, and hit dperssed her and mad eher lose hpe more than any of the things shed seeniwe th the doctor. More than Daleks massacring people and stuvivinf and moe than her hsiuabdns shit global wanring dinal shit. And then she realzed, hoerribly, tha t her entire lifeshe had eben in th ebackseet. Her appretns ahd dictated her childohond and early aduitl life, other realites too, rand it was because of relaitesv shed gone to UNIT, not because eh sew as special or becua seo fo anything shed don. And then the people at UNIT and the Doctor ahd decieed everything after tha,t until theyd handed her off to her husband to deice eeverthing for her now. Her entite life she'd been a poassive observer of the story of Joh Grant, as it was passed off from one eorso to the next as each of them got obroed with hit. She had neve ronce made ansingle chioice for herself. Edcept for now. This, here, and now, was rhe onte choide Joh Grant had madde herself. Gerting ot this gun and putting it hto her forehead. It hadn'et been a coinucsi choice by any means, but it was clearly a choice or rather series of tint movements that eventually had amoiontued to a cihoice, and now, finally, she was here with a gun to her head that shed put there with ono hope in the world and now, finally, the entire fate of her future reted on this one most pimportant choice of her life and it was a coice that SHE WOUDLC OUCNOISLY MAEK. SHE AND SHE ALONE WOULD MAKE THIS CHOICE, AND SHE AND SHE ALONE WOULD DEAL WITH ITS' COINCESUEUNDES, WHATEVER THEY WOULD BE. And now, she new it was time. Time tomfianlly make that choice. Time to decide the future of Joh Grant.
Three days later the Doctor arrived in his TARDIS at the little cottage to see how his old friend Joh Grant was going with her husband ahd stuff, and when he nockedon the door her husband was there. He said – Hey Mr. Grant! Is Joh home today I am ohld friend Doctor, remember?!
Mr. Grant said – Oh I'm sorry Doctor, Joh is ded. She sho herefelt.
The Doctor said – Oh. Goodbye, then.
Then the Doctor cried and walked away, back to his TARDIS. In the TARDIS he cried and cried and cried. Allof his compainos were off doing others tuff right then,a nd eh ws alone. Crying he thought – What hapepend? Why is Joh dead? How could Joh do this I lived her she was one of my brst firned and now sher is dead and onge and I don't'e ven no why! I that anything I could have done?
He didn't no and he new he never would ahdn that was horrible and he new he would never see Joh again. Hw could go ack and time to before she died and try to save her or something, but that would destroy time. And he new he couldn't bear to see her again and just act like everytihn aas normal and like he didn't now washt was going to happen. This was it. She was gone forever. So, sad and not noing what to do, the Doctor went and helped a blind kid with cancer named Timmy to get some money or some shit.