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godric777: Thank you. I hope you'll enjoy the rest of the story.
Arthur pulled away from his family and looked around at the confused faces of the crowd that surround them. Waiting for him to say more, explain himself. Most seemed to be simply confused and not overly negative to what he said. Which was a start. He could work with that.
"I know that you all must have a lot of questions, thoughts about this." The king began again in a raise voice that he hoped reached the most people it could. "That is understandable, but don't think I have made this decision easily. That I have not thought long and hard, struggled over it." Some of the harshest hostility seemed to lessen. "I believe that this is best for Camelot."
Merlin shut his eyes as he heard the muffled rumblings from the people outside. He felt that there was a thin invisible layer that was separating him form the world. From the stone stairs he sat on and the people he could just hear, but he really couldn't feel either not truly. His mind spun with thoughts that came into focus for a second then was quickly replaced. He had been working towards this day for years. Had but his life in danger to make it happen. Made hard choices he should never have been made to make it happen. Then when it finally happened, here he was shut away from everyone. Literally in the dark of the narrow staircase while they stood out in the last light of the sun.
Out of nowhere a hand came down onto his shoulder. Pulling him from falling further down into his melancholy. Turing and looking up he saw Giaus looking down at him, offering a comforting smile. He didn't say anything. He didn't have to. He sat down next to him with only a faint groan as his old bones creaked into the now unnatural position. His arm slid to Merlin's other shoulder, pulling the younger man into a side hug. If he could, he would have given Merlin a proper hug. He feared such a gesture would not be overly appreciated.
"I'm proud of you." He said into the top of the young man's hair, as he pulled him in closer.
Arthur's voice grew "I have learned that magic is not either good or bad. It in itself is not anything that can be judged. It simply is." Arthur watched Morgana closely as he spoke further. He couldn't be sure as she turned away for a second, but he was sure he saw her eyes glistening a little. "It is the intention behind the magic that matters." Most of the crowd had to agree that their king was correct on that point. Even if they didn't want to admit it. "If magic is used by anyone to harm an innocent then they will face the consequences for that action. If magic is used to heal a wound or protect someone for injury, they there should not be punishment. The matter will no longer be seen as black and white, right or wrong, but judged on the intension and the action itself."
It was faint at first, but a low clapping began to build up as the citizens of Camelot came to understand and accept the change that was to come. The possibilities that this changed offered opened up before them.
"This will be a new start for Camelot. When we step into the future." The king finished.
The crowd's cheering and clapping grew. With a small gesture from Arthur the musicians began to play again, and a few people began to dance again. Morgana still in deep shock took hold of Arthurs arm. He turned back to face her, saw her about to spill the many questions she had. Arthur stopped her. They would talk about it all tomorrow. Tonight, was for celebrating. It scared her to leave the matter alone. She had wanted this for so long. Now she had it in her hands she feared it may slip like water through her hands. Arthur could change his mind. Truly she doubted that he would. Not after he had made a speech to the whole city, but she didn't trust her fortune. Seeing her worry Arthur placed his free hand on her shoulder.
"I promise we will have all the time we need to talk over this all tomorrow."
Her emotions racing from fear to joy seemed to relax as she let out a deep breath and nodded in understanding.
Arthur turned from his sister to his future wife. Holding out his hand he took hers and they moved to the where some people had begun dancing again as they music resumed.
"I'm proud of you." She said as she quickly kissed his cheek. He tried to brush off the praise, but Gwen wouldn't let him. "It takes real courage to admit to a mistake and work to rectify it."
While Arthur would not go so far as to say the law had been a mistake, he did admit that it had been to rigidly enforced. Leaving little to no room for the grey areas that the world existed in. He felt sure he had made the right choice. That this was the right thing to do. If he truly wanted to rule over a kingdom that was fair and just, then this was a change that had to be made. He was hopeful for the future but was under no illusions that it would not be an easy change. There would be those that fought against it. People who held on to the distrust and fear of magic, that had been engrained in them for all or most of their lives. In time he hoped this would change, though it would take time. Taking the first step was important.
Mordred had stood rooted to the spot during Arthur's speech. He couldn't believe it. Not what was being said but who was saying it. That magic was going to come back to Camelot, and he was here to see it happen. Over the last few years, he had told those closest to him that magic didn't matter to him. That he didn't need it in his life. He had meant it, but it was not the complete truth. It had been a way to avoid questions. A way to get through life without seeming to be affected by much. To seem detached. As calm and apathetic as Kara. He tried not to think of her, to push the thoughts of her from his mind. He couldn't help but think of how she would take this news. She would act unaffected, but he would know it was an act because he would see that sparkle in her bright eyes.
A Hand patted him on his back, spinning round he saw the back of Gwaine as he was walking away. A little beyond him he saw Morgana walking around the edge of the crowd. She lifted her head and met his eyes. Then she turned back and kept walking. Something in her eyes told him that she wanted him to follow her. Moving to follow he brushed shoulders with Lancelot. The younger man made the excuse of getting a drink, which the older knight accepted readily and stepped aside to let Mordred pass.
He walked towards the castle entering the long dark corridor that Morgana and Merlin had met in only a few minutes ago, but it now seemed a like a different day. After all it was the start of a new age.
Just as Mordred entered the castle, he saw Morgana entering a room a little up ahead. He quickly followed her, closing the door behind him. As he turned to face her, he was going to say words of congratulations, but she pulled him into a hug before he could say anything. Silencing him further with how glad she was that he was here for such a moment. Pulling away as quickly as she had hugged him, he saw that despite the joy in her words she wore a look of sadness. Not great sadness, but sadness still the same.
"Morgana are you alright." He worriedly asked as he placed his hands on her shoulders.
Morgana nodded. "Yes, though I fear I have acted unwisely." Silently he urged her to carry on. "I have asked Merlin, Gwen, Gwaine and Lancelot not to tell Arthur that you have met him before." Mordred understood but couldn't understand why she was so troubled by it. "Do you wish to stay here, in Camelot."
Taking in a deep breath Mordred dropped his arms to his sides and took a step back, as he tried to find the answer to what he was asked.
"I...I don't know, I"
"I'm sorry, it's my fault but you have to answer now."
"Why. Magic is no longer a crime."
"No, but if you want to build a life here you have to make a choice."
"I still don't understand."
"If you stay Arthur will take you more under his wing. He has always wanted a younger brother. He will trust you and train you to be a knight. If he does that and then finds out the truth, he will feel betrayed." As she spoke her guilt grew. "I should have waited, asked you. I just, worried." Mordred nodded. "You don't have to say a thing, no one who knows would say anything, but he can never know. If you are ever going to tell him then it has to be now. There will never be a better time than right now."
She hated that she had to say it as plainly, but she didn't want Mordred to be forced to deny who he was like Merlin. He tried to hide it. Did a very good job of seeming and content with his place in life, but she could see past it. Had felt what he felt, what he pushed down and tried not to feel. Merlin may have let his best chance to be honest with Arthur and everyone, but she wasn't going to let that happened to Mordred. She would keep his secret if that was what he chose to do, but she had to make sure that he had the chance to make that choice before it was made for him by doing nothing.
I'm so sorry you don't have time to think-"
"Morgana, you were trying to protect me. You don't have to apologize."
She didn't believe him. "Yes, I do."
Nothing he said would change her mind. So reluctantly he left her with her guilt.
"I want to stay."
The sureness of his voice surprised him. In truth he wasn't even sure what his answer would be until he spoke. If Morgana was surprised by his choice, she didn't show any sign of it. Maybe she already knew. One of her dreams of the future maybe. She looked nether happy or sad about his choice. He felt sure she wanted to say a lot on the matter, but time seemed to matter so she chose to move onto the next thing. What if anything would he tell Arthur.
"You know Arthur better than I-"
"If you tell him I will go with you and make sure he knows I was the one that told you not to say anything. I won't say anything about anyone else knowing but me."
Mordred didn't like that she would take all the blame for the withholding of information, but he knew that it would be for the best. He knew too what he had to do. If he truly wanted to make a life here. A life that he could be truly himself and be proud of. A life that maybe Kara, with the change in the law might want to live with him. Then he had to begin it in the right way. Not with a lie, a deception. He had to tell Arthur the truth. At least enough of it that didn't drag anyone else into it.
"I'll tell him."
"We, we will tell him tomorrow." Morgana corrected.
Like before he knew there was no point in trying to change her mind. Once she was set on something he knew Morgana to be incredibly stubborn. So, he agreed.
Morgana let out a breath, as her shoulders dropped as she relaxed a little. "There is something else." Mordred nodded for her to carry on. "Did you feel anyway strange before Merlin fainted."
He thought about it for a while and released that he had felt a little lightheaded, but he had put that down to the ale he had drank when he had only eaten a little. Not a lot and he had drank ale many times before, but it seemed to affect him a little more than normal. It quickly past, and he felt perfectly fine as Arthur began his speech. As he told her this, she seemed in two minds about it. When he had answered she told him what had really happened to Merlin. What she had experienced herself. Mordred wondered if that was what he had felt himself, but to a far less degree.
"We are going to Avalon. Will you come." Of course, Merlin had not agreed. Morgana believed it was just a matter of time.
She knew his answer before she even asked, but she had to at least make the offer. Mordred shock his head slowly, not liking disappointing her. A forced smile spread across her face as she told him it was alright, that she understood. "We'll talk to Arthur tomorrow." She quickly changed the subject.
"Alright."
Relief seemed to wash over Morgana as she once again pulled him into a tight hug. Quickly realizing that he was now a grown man and didn't need her fussing over him, she pulled back. Not before she quickly kissed his check. Then shooed him away to go and rejoin the celebration. She feigned tiredness and didn't follow him back outside. He had a good idea where she was going but didn't bring it up.
It was difficult to say how long they had sat on the hard cold steps for, but Gaius's old bones were beginning to ache. Silently they pulled themselves to their feet. Merlin offering support as they did. When he was standing Merlin looked back out the narrow window, down at the city gathered all together. He saw Arthur and Gwen now dancing. Lancelot and Leon had also been drawn into the dancing as well. Leon with the new kitchen maid that had asked him to dance. Despite himself Merin couldn't help feeling a very slight hurt feeling at this, but it quickly passed.
Giaus moved to descend the stairs, but Merlin didn't follow. "Are you coming."
"No I..." Giaus just nodded; he didn't need an explication he was sure he knew where he was going.
There was someone that was missing when Merlin looked out the window. The one person that could understand the many conflicting feelings he felt right now. He climbed the stairs. Taking them two at a time, as he made his way to Morgana's chambers. He expected that like him she needed a little time alone to take in what had happened. Alos like himself he felt sure that she could use someone that understood to talk too. Could maybe help make sense of it all. He managed to catch himself from just opening the door and walking in. He knocked and got no answer. He tried again. Still nothing. He casually pushed open the door and stuck his head in the room. He called her name and scanned the room but didn't see her. Gently he closed the door and made his way to his own room. He would go back outside soon. He just needed awhile to be able to put on the mask he had to wore in regard to anything to do with magic.
When he reached the corridor his and Gaius's room's where on he saw the door was half open when he was sure he had closed it fully when he left earlier. As he drew nearer, he heard his name being called in a familiar voice yet in a strange tone. When he opened the door, he saw Morgana turning back to face him. They both were about to speak but nether said anything. Instead, a sound that was a mix between a laugh and a cry filled the room, as Morgana moved forward, and Merlin moved into the room.
In a split-second Merlin lifted his Arms as Morgana tentatively lifted hers. They pulled each other into the tightest hug they had shared as they continued to laugh and cry. Neither able to formulate the words to express what they were feeling. Morgana gripped onto Merlin's jacket as she felt tears slide down her face. As they both began to struggle to take a breath they began to rain in their emotions. As they pulled apart Merlin's hand got slightly caught in Morgana's hair. Giving him more time to try and read her face. Her pales watered as she tried to wipe the tears away while she smiled a wide real smile. He didn't think he had ever seen her smile as brightly as she did now. All the years of pain, the lines hate and bitterness and worn into her skin all seemed to melt away.
"I never...I didn't."
"I know. I didn't-"
"How could you not believe that it would happen. Isn't this exactly what you were working for all this time. Everything for this." She asked confused.
She was right. He didn't understand it himself. "I don't know." He shrugged. "I just, never like this. Out of nowhere."
Morgana nodded as she took a step back. "This is everything that we wanted. Everything we've done. The people we hurt. All of it for this." Merlin nodded along. "Then why do I feel so empty." Merlin looked a little confused. "I feel relief, joy and fear. But deep down I feel hollow, empty."
Her tone started out confused and then took on a questioning edge. Like she was asking him to explain why she felt empty. Right when she should have felt most alive. The Problem was that not until she said it had Merlin realized that that was exactly how he was feeling too. If he couldn't make sense of it for himself, how could he make sense of it for someone else. But he tried anyway.
"Because we don't trust it."
"You think Arthur will change his mind." She challenged. Merlin shook his head. "Then-"
"I don't think we trust good things." He slumped down at the bench seat as he clarified.
Morgana gave an irritated nod of agreement that he was properly right.
"I'll speak it all over with him tomorrow. Maybe then-"
"We'll trust it." He finished for her.
With another nod she moved to leave. She wanted to go back outside and try and build on her excitement. Merlin didn't seem like he wanted to join her and the others, so she didn't ask. She made it only a few steps before Merlin spoke again.
"Alright." She turned to face him. "We'll go to Avalon."
Morgana took in a deep breath as she once again tried to manage her feelings. This time she was the only one that moved forward. Closing the distance between then swiftly she threw her arms around Merlin's neck. Her laughter rang in his ear as he returned the hug. Morgana held on tighter, causing Merlin to lose his balance a little and lean backwards. Lifting Morgana off the ground. She either didn't seem to notice or care. As after he had corrected himself and they pulled apart, she continued to laugh and wore the brightest smile he had ever seen her wear. Brighter than the last if it was possible.
"Really." She questioned. Needing more reassurance. Her hand now holding onto his arms.
"Yes, we can leave with Lancelot. I'll say I'm going to see my mother-"
"You had that excuse already."
Merlin shrugged. "I have to be prepared."
"Of course, you do." She teased.
Merlin was about to make a smart reply, but it didn't seem the right time. He just smiled back at her and let out a laugh that she joined in with.
"It's really happening." He nodded to her question. "We don't have to live in fear anymore."
"No." Merlin conformed.
Starting to feel more of his excitement hope for the future build. Maybe what he had needed, what they both needed was to share the triumph of the moment with someone that understood what it truly meant. What it felt like to no longer have the threat of a rope or sword hanging over their heads. To no longer have to wear a mask to face the world. To think over everything, they said and did, so not to give away anything. How heavy that weight had been, now they no longer had to carry it. They stood still, their hands still holding onto each other. While they tried to pinpoint the many emotions that played across the others face. Excitement and pure joy now the most prevalent. Made all the more important because they were looking at the only person that could understand just how much all of this meant.
A light knock at the door pulled them back from their shared moment of triumph. Jumping apart they turned to face the door and felt relief wash over them when they saw who it was.
Lancelot entered the room trying to act like he had not just walked in on what seemed to have been a private moment. "Sorry, but Arthur sent me to make sure that finally join the celebration, Merlin."
Merlin was a little surprised that Arthur had noticed that he hadn't come back to the celebration yet. He properly wanted another drink or more food. Lancelot walked into the room further as he spoke. When he was close enough, he placed a hand on Merlin's shoulder.
"Congratulations." The knight said to his friend.
Merlin lifted his arm and took hold of Lancelot's shoulder. "Thank you."
Lancelot turned to Morgana offering her a smile in congratulations that she returned.
"We're going to Avlon." Merlin said after a brief pause.
Lancelot looked to Morgana who smiled and nodded confirming what Merlin said. The knight looked back to his friend. He looked happy. He knew that Merlin would not be doing this if he didn't truly want to. But he couldn't help but worry that he was letting himself go down a path that would not lead anywhere good.
"So, if it's still alright with you, we'll leave with you." Merlin asked, though he already knew the answer. The knight of course agreed.
Morgana made her excuse to leave, feeling that the two men wanted to talk further without her. When she was gone Lancelot was about to speak, but Merlin quickly cut him saying how hungry he was and hoped there was still hot food left as he moved to leave to. As Arthur had said to Morgana there would be time for walking everything over tomorrow. Tonight, was for celebrating and there was much to celebrate.
Hope you liked it. Thank you for reading. As always, I would love to hear any feedback, comments or ideas you have for the story. Which characters, relationships you would like to see more of.
Hope to hear from you.