authorsnote: chapter 20!
sorry you had to wait so long for this, but I'm delighted with how it turned out
do enjoy, do review
songrecs: daylight - david kushner (my new fanfic inspo song lol)
"We pray for Sansa Stark to come home, safe and unharmed, we pray for her wellbeing and her state of mind, and hope if she cannot come home right away, that she remains safe and well during her travels"
It was the same prayer she'd recited each and every morning since she'd arrived at Winterfell, alongside others, but she always ended on a prayer for Robb's sister, her goodsister now as she closed her prayers at the Sept.
She knew the Northerners didn't keep with the seven, but in her mind, there were plenty of Northerners taking to their knees in the Godswood, begging the Old Gods to return Sansa Stark, she figured a voice in the Sept, to the Seven didn't hurt.
Especially as everyone presumed Sansa to still be below the Neck, where the Seven presided.
There were no Weirwoods below after all, the Old Gods couldn't hear the Northerners there, but perhaps, just perhaps the Seven could hear her.
As she stood, brushed down her skirts and bowed her head to the Mother, for she always said her prayer to Sansa at the alter of the Mother, hoping she would look out for Sansa, she nodded at the Septa, who had travelled with her from the Twins before heading out into the courtyard.
For not the first time she was glad for her goodfather, who she'd never meet but appreciated all the same, for acquiescing to giving his wife, Lady Stark, a Sept in Winterfell, to Roslin it had been of great comfort to her since coming North.
North, her new home, for she was now Queen of it.
Something she'd never imagined as a child, and still couldn't quite grasp. A shy and gentle child she'd never held great ambition, had just hoped to leave home as soon as she could, hating the Twins, hating the way her family was mocked, fearful and shy around her own family, she'd wished to marry a Lord, or would have happily taken a commoner too, had even had dreams of living on a farm, for she had always been good with horses…
And then had come Robb Stark, the most handsome man she'd ever met, windswept as he'd come into the hall to meet her Fathers bargain, still dressed in armour, mud splattered, not smiling but not unkind, and she was sure half of her sisters and cousins in the hall had fallen in love with him.
And yet, he'd chosen her.
Chosen her and now she was his wife.
And she couldn't have been happier.
The Queen aspect of it all was challenging, she had never imagined this and was not made for it, but Lady Stark had been a help, and Robb too, who was the very opposite of unkind, instead loving, and sweet and patient as she sat with the Maester and Scholars to learn of the North, to understand her role in all of this, to do well.
For she wanted to do well, for Robb. He'd been nothing but kind to her and taken her away from home, as she'd always wanted, she owed it to him to be a good Queen, a good wife.
And a good sister to Sansa, even though they'd never met.
Hence her daily prayers in the Sept for her, hoping upon hope that one day she would come through the gates, in a flash of red hair, a perfect Lady as Robb has wistfully and sadly described her. Arya would no doubt charge up to her (and she seemed to do a lot of charging, her other goodsister, who had been kind too, if a little unruly), and Roslin would not be far behind to meet her and welcome her home.
As she hoped her prayers would help.
She knew she wasn't the only one begging the Gods to return Sansa Stark to Winterfell, and as she made her way to the Glass Gardens (for she adored to garden, had never been able to at the Twins, and Robb have her free reign here, and it helped the people, a perfect activity in her books), she sent up another little prayer.
One of many, for the lost Stark daughter to come home.
Though, said lost Stark daughter wouldn't have wanted to be home, or in her own room, or in the Godswood, or even on a bed of cosy pillows with lemon cakes and strawberries at that moment.
She wouldn't have wanted to be anywhere but where she was.
Which was under the shade of an oak tree, the rain dribbling down around them, but even the weather could not ruin her joy, as her cheeks strained from the permanent grin that had been plastered to her face since she had awoken.
A grin that was mirrored if not quite as pretty but still full of joy, and the spark in his eye was genuine, as stood opposite her.
It was no Weirwood, but the oak Jaime had found would have to do, and with a carved face in the bark it was good enough for her.
Good enough to become a woman wed.
She had carved the face herself, taking Jaimes dagger and hacking into the wood, trying to be as delicate as possible in drawing the Heart Trees face, it wasn't as good as the one in Winterfell, the oak not as wielding to her blade, but it was enough, enough to marry in front of.
'One day we'll marry in front of a Heart Tree' Jaime as said as they'd found this woods, walked inside for an hour, before coming to a stop in a clearing in front of a patch of birch and oak trees, until Jaime had declared the tallest oak in the crop the one for them, 'That I promise'
Her cheeks had strained under a smile for that as he'd handed her his blade, nothing but sincerity in front of his eyes.
'In front of the Heart Tree in Winterfells Godswood' She had responded, and Jaime had managed a smile too.
Now here they stood, not in the Winterfell Godswood, not yet, but here.
Nowhere she'd rather be.
There was no need for any witness or priest, and though she felt a pang to not be given away by her Father, or Robb in his place, she knew this was the right decision, knew this was what they had to do to ensure they were not parted.
Knew this was what she had to do to keep Jaime by her side.
The man she loved.
Because she knew then, had known for a while she was sure, but knew with utter clarity as she presented herself in front of the oak, as she went to Jaime with a smile, hands clasped in front of her, dressed in her ripped, dirty dress, and yet Jaime looked at her as though she was the most beautiful woman he'd ever seen.
She felt it when he looked at her.
And she knew she couldn't stand to be parted from him, the very idea filling her tummy with anxiety and fear. She knew this was the way, as man and wife they wouldn't be parted, and perhaps she'd get her happily ever after.
Life isn't a song…
It wasn't, but she could still pray for a reprieve.
"Who comes before the Old Gods?" It was Jaime who spoke first breaking her thoughts as he started the ceremony, there was no one to give her away so they had to improvise.
Sansa had explained the ceremony as they'd walked to find the woods and the perfect tree, Jaime had been pleased it wasn't as pompous as the ceremony under the Seven and Sansa quite agreed.
This was right, being married at least in a way before the Old Gods.
Her Fathers Gods; her families Gods.
She'd explained how she'd come to him, how there weren't really any vows, how instead the idea was that the Gods would be watching their union; Sansa hoped they could still see her this far South of Winterfell, she hoped they were watching.
But then, when had hope in the Gods gotten her anywhere? Perhaps they would observe though, they'd never stepped in for her but maybe they could at least see her union with Jaime, that was all she needed from them now
"I do, Sansa of the House Stark, come here to wed, to beg the blessings of the Gods" She said, her voice clear and with conviction, there could be no doubt she wanted this, none at all. "Who comes to claim her?"
"Jaime of House Lannister" The twinkle in his eye had her cheeks splitting, "Who gives her?"
"I do" She said, a little cheekily and Jaime laughed, she liked that, making him laugh, making him smile. "Sansa of House Stark" She said, and her grin remained mischievous. They had talked through this, how it might be a bit odd, but the Old Gods were the only witness they needed. They both grinned.
There hadn't been enough laughter nor smiles in her life for so long, now she hoped to be spoiled for them.
"Sansa of House Stark, do you take this man?" Jaime said, and she fought the urge to roll her eyes at the teasing in his voice.
"I take this man" She said, but there was no teasing then, from either of them, as the weight of it settled over them, the weight of what they were doing.
Their smiles didn't fade.
"And I take this woman" Jaime said, clearly intending it as a joke, for that was not needed, and yet it sounded serious, and he sounded sincere, as though he wanted to make that clear. She liked that addition.
When Sansa had imagined her wedding as a child, she had always thought it would be a grand affair, a ceremony in the Sept and the Godswood, surrounded by guests, in a great gown with a beautiful maiden cloak stitched by her own hand, with Lords and Ladies from afar, her hair shining, her smile innocent, her husband dashing, the Heart Tree of Winterfell looking down on them, surrounded by snows.
Instead, she had a dashing husband yet, and her smile was eager rather than innocent, there were no Lords or Ladies bar the two of them, no maiden cloak or Sept, just an honest ceremony before the Old Gods. They were both dirty and tired, and yet they both smiled from ear to ear.
She couldn't imagine a more perfect ceremony.
"Then we are wed" She whispered, and they were, truly, this was all that was needed, the witness of the Old Gods, and though there was no Weirwood, she trusted even here the Old Gods could see them, and could see the promise they had made.
A promise that wrapped around her heart and soul, nestled there and would until the end of their days.
"I take you until the end of my days" She added, didn't need to, but wanted to, she didn't want to add too much of the Southern ceremony, but it felt important to add something, some kind of promise beyond the ceremony, for them.
"You know in a Southern ceremony they seal the wedding with a kiss" He teased, taking a step closer. They had both stood either side of the oak for the ceremony, the rain letting up to give them sunshine for just a moment, now he stepped closer, and Sansa's cheeks stung pink.
"I suppose we could lend that tradition" Sansa whispered, as Jaime dipped his head, captured her lips with his, and she melted into his embrace, flinging her arms around his neck, he laughed against her lips, not one of mocking but one of pure happiness, she grinned too, her cheeks hurting.
It was truly perfect.
"My wife" Jaime whispered as he kissed her, brushing his lips ever so gently over hers before deepening the kiss, to which she sighed happily into his embrace. This, this was happiness.
And now, as they sealed the union with a kiss, and she felt a little thrill at being man and wife, she knew no one could take Jaime away from her, not now, not now she was his, and he hers.
They could try, but they would not succeed.
"My husband" She whispered back and he laughed.
"I never thought I'd be happy to hear that from anyone" He admitted as his hands encircled her waist, keeping her close, her hands moving to rest on his chest, where she could feel the beating of his heart, in line with hers. "But I am, truly"
"I'm glad" She said, and her heart stuttered as she spoke next, not able to stop herself, "Jaime … I .. I love you, I think, no, I know" She stumbled, her least elegant response, but she had felt a need to say it, and had managed it, her cheeks aflame, nerves rushing through her.
She didn't need him to say it back, as he looked at her, shock in his eyes wide, a bit of nerves too, she didn't need him to, she just wanted to declare it, she didn't…
"I love you too Sansa" He said, and the sincerity in his voice could not be faked, her own eyes widened, a little gasp leaving her lips, a tear trickling down her cheek before she could stop it.
That she could have this, after all of the hardships she had endured, all of the pain and suffering, her family taken from her, too long spent in the South away from home, the scheming and lies of the Capitol, that something good could come from it, something brilliant …
It seemed impossible after all she had endured.
"Really?" She whispered, as he pulled her closer, tugging her fully into his arms, where she went happily, as he wrapped his around her, one finding her hair, as he dipped his lips to whisper into her ear, worship in his tone.
"You have saved me" He said, gently, reverently, and she imagined tears in his eyes too, as they escaped from hers, down her cheeks like diamonds, as she buried her face in Jaime's neck, pressing a kiss there, a sob leaving her lips, not of sadness or despair for once, but of pure and complete elated happiness.
"It is you who has saved me" She insisted as she drew back and kissed him once more, this time of her own volition, "I love you Jaime, more than anything"
"As I do you" He said, kissing her once more, the salt of their tears mingling, his hand cupping her cheek, as she leaned in, breathing him in. "Always Sansa"
"I will protect you with my life" He said, and she knew this was a vow to him, as he said it, his green Lannister eyes meeting her Tully blue, she knew he took it to his soul as a vow, one he would not break.
She rested a hand atop his heart, and said nothing more, for nothing more needed to be said, not as they both tipped forward, their foreheads meeting as Jaime leaned down, breathing one another in, man and wife, happy, but with a long road still to walk, but together.
And the Old Gods watched on, as a union that would tip the balance of Westeros was struck in secret...
... or was it? For a raven flew overhead, because the Old Gods had not been the only witness.
oooooof, its about to get spicy
sry this took so long and is a lil short, I was sorting out a plot point that comes next, but now I've worked it out I am delighted to take this story forward
do review...
speak soon(er) I promise!