Chapter 15
"Dealing with difficulty"
Had I known Karen's plans for the next week, I would have been able to go along. Yet again, I was left in the dark as to what would be said or even planned to discuss Niko's freedom from other contracts. Karen did specify that he was to do the three most wanted contracts in the country, and he only did one. His success on the first one was highly praised by Karen, but could it be enough to sway the federal government to allow Niko freedom after one? It was too much for him to handle the second one as he barely made it out alive. He was stuck in a basement for more than a week being starved and tortured. It was possible that the third one could be just as dangerous.
"So, we are clear, Niko?" I heard Karen ask as they stood up from the kitchen table.
They were talking in hushed volumes. I tried to listen in and read Niko's lips, but I was too taken on how I wanted them all over my body. Stupid one track mind.
"I got it." He said.
"We will want to meet up Wednesday in the morning to discuss a possible termination of your last contract and your freedom. That's the plan. If we play well with them, they might let you off."
"That's if they are willing to work with me. What if they don't agree to my terms?"
"My connections will hear first what we have to say and what we offer before they say anything. They are a little more lenient than the man you talked to the first time."
"I hope so. I'd hate to go in this last one and I end up dying."
His words scared me. The thought of me losing him was the last thing I wanted to think of. Hell, it was something I never wanted to think of.
"If they really want you to complete the last mission you agreed to do, they will look into how difficult it would be for you. If it seems like you are not enough, they may send more help to you, or they may choose another file.
Niko stood from the table and walked up to me on the couch. I couldn't help stare at him as he walked.
"We need your input." He said as he moved to me.
"Niko, she can't help us." Karen retorted.
"Yes she can. She's as every bit a part of this as you and me."
"She knows nothing of this kind of work."
He ignored her and sat next to me. Every cell in my body wanted to jump on him, and I had to use a great deal of resistance to stop myself.
"What do you think of all this? Would you agree to me doing one more less hazardous contract, or would you rather me try and squeeze out of it just doing one? Well, one and a half. I think I deserve a little credit for the last one." He smiled.
"To he honest, I'd rather you try and talk your way out of another one. How can I be so sure that this one will be less hazardous? You could never come back to me."
"The vote is clear. I will ask your connections for a free pass on Wednesday. I've had enough killing. I want to love."
"This is extremely uncharacteristic of you, Niko." Karen noted.
"Even people like me can change, Karen. It all depends on who you surround yourself with. Look at you. At the start of this, you were a total bitch. Now you're changed. I can see it."
"How dare-" She paused in thought. "You're right. I think seeing you change made me realize I could too."
"It's nice to see an example of what's in your future, isn't it?" He swayed.
"I guess we will have to hear what they say, first of all. Your future is now tied with mine. If my employers do not accept our deal, I could be with you three for a lot longer. Second of all, we have to worry about the police, too. We've been making a lot of noise the past few days and making too many phone calls. I'm sure they were able to trace us in this area. We will have to stay quiet. If we get caught, there will be no futures for anyone. No phone calls from now on, and no movements outside the apartment."
"So, this is a stay-in? We will need more essentials again." I noted.
"Have your cousin get some supplies, Niko." Karen suggested.
"I can't make a phone call."
"Alright. I will go out and get what we need. In the meantime, you three stay here and keep quiet. My contacts will make sure the police keep away from here."
Karen gathered the money from Niko and started her shopping quest. It was Niko, myself, and my brother hiding out in an apartment keeping low and out of sight from the police. It would be an opportune moment to strike with us having no way of defending ourselves. Karen and her contacts were the only people able to keep us out of harms way. If we made too much noise, they'd come after Niko and my brother. Silence was a virtue. So, that meant sex was out the window. Damn it.
"This is extremely unstable." I say after a few minutes.
"What do you mean?"
"I mean, we move from place to place, keep quiet, you go off and do what you do, and we gotta be quite again."
"I told you this is not the life I want. A fourty year old man snaking around life, scraping together an existence with nothing to show for it. I don't want to be a life that was easily forgotten. I want a legacy. A man out of Serbia who came to America to make a change from all the horrors he had to face only to become a normal man with a family and friends who will remember him when he dies."
"I believe you. It's not the life I would want too. I'd want the freedom to do what I want when I want."
"Come Wednesday, there is a chance this could all go away. I could get my citizenship and finally be free."
I could only smile at him as I knew this is what he wanted most of all out of life. The need to have things some people take for granted.
The next day, Niko prepared himself for his meeting. He asked Roman when he stopped by to go out and get his fancy tuxedo to make an impression on Karen's contacts. Roman agreed telling Niko he owed him for this. His comment when he returned with his clothes, an iron, and a few items made me chuckle.
"I never thought I'd ever touch my cousin's underwear."
Of course, Niko retorted with a comment saying he's touched plenty of stripper's underwear, so it shouldn't bother him that much.
I watched Niko iron the trousers and marveled at his ability to push his past week behind him. On the outside, he was calm and collected, but I'm sure on the inside there was an inner struggle; the war was still a plague in his mind. He seemed to be able to switch off things he didn't want to remember. However, I could see it in his eyes whenever he spoke to me. His eyes pleading with mine to help him forget. To help him get pulled out of the past to have a future.
My brother was playing on my phone. It was something to preoccupy his mind and allow him to not think about his drug addiction. It was pretty easy for me to see that his addiction was slowly fading away. It was with mine and Niko's help that he was able to only once have a severe withdrawl. Niko even said he saw my brother one day getting back into classes to finish his computer degree along with his words of encouragement.
"You'd have me as your first customer once you get a job in the computer career."
Even Karen surprised us with her date. She apparently was on a dating website and was looking for a boyfriend. All this time, she had been chatting with this guy she'd shown interest in. And I felt ashamed when I thought it was her trying to sabotage Niko. I instantly apologized for thinking that, and her words of forgiveness were to follow.
"If I were you, I'd be suspicious of me too. It was something I wanted to do privately."
She threw over her little purse and headed for her date. It was a bad time to think about dating someone when all eyes were on the apartment. She was asked to meet up with this guy for a couple of days, and she ran out of excuses to give him. With Niko at large and my brother a wanted man by the government, they could strike at any time. It seemed Niko was our protector again. A role he didn't take so lightly.
He prepared dinner for my brother and I around 7 pm. He made a Serbian themed diner. Serbian Gjuwetsch. It was one of his favorite foods his mother prepared for him and his brother before the war came. It was a simple recipe that consisted of ground beef, green and red peppers, onions, and tomatoes all over rice. He even asked me to help him make the dish. It was a tiny taste of his culture, and I was really glad he shared it with me. It was delicious, and I was told it was the same recepie his mother used.
"Tastes just how I remember." He reminessed.
The rest of the night consisted of us just talking to each other. Niko and my brother had a lot to say. It looked like he has accepted Niko as his future brother in law. My brother asked if we could watch a movie, but he didn't even make it past the middle of the movie. He fell asleep on the couch around 12:30, and with Karen still out on her date, I began to get devious ideas. My mind was in total control of me as I felt myself getting warmer. I desperately squeezed my legs together to try and quell my hunger for him. I knew he really must not be in the mood for sex, and I fought the lust off because I started cramping. My restlessness made him divert his attention from the movie to me.
"What's wrong? The food I cook for you upsetting your stomach?"
"No." I trailed.
"Well, what is it? Do you have to pee?"
"I don't have to pee, but it has to do with my pussy."
Niko caught on as his eyebrows shot up.
"But I really don't want to have sex, Niko. I am on my period."
"There's other ways to get what you are in need of."
"How?"
"I can take the edge off for you. I can finger you if you want me to."
"I don't want my mess to get on you."
He assisted me when I was asked to sit in his lap. He soothed me by rubbing my back and singing some Serbian songs and hymns he knew. His voice against my ear as I pressed it against his chest made me melt. His arms wrapped around me, and I was trapped in his love. I couldn't find the words on how he made me feel. It was almost like he put me under his spell, and he would never let me go. Which was fine with me...
"Сећам се, падине стабала и оближњег језера, док сам те чврсто држао, поветарац нас је окренуо, свет замрзнут, вријеме заустављања, када смо се држали једни друге тог јесенског дана. Да ли се сећате, дан када сам вас упознао, ствари које су важне, сада нису ништа, могао бих вас задржати, заувек више, баш као и ја, тај јесен."
I had no idea what he sang. I assumed it was probably a song his mother sang to him and his brother as a bedtime song. Maybe he will teach me how to sing it someday.
"That was beautiful, Niko." I say as I still cooed against his chest. "What does it mean?"
"It was a song I learned from my mother. It is about two lovers who find each other after so many years apart. They finally become one in autumn by a lake where they first met and become husband and wife. There was more to it, but I forgot the rest. In the end of the song, the two lovers die together and are burried under the same lake where they fell in love."
"That's so romantic!"
"Shh, my love. You don't want to alert everyone to our location." He said as he chuckled.
"So, your mother? Was she a romantic?"
"Oh yes. She married my father with the wish that she would be like those two in the song, but her song turned out to be much different. She always believed that my brother and I would find a nice woman, so we could be happy. She made us promise that we would never be like our father. I live up to her wishes as much as possible, but sometimes I think I failed."
"How so?"
"Well, when I was taken to strip clubs with my friends, I feel like just me being in that environment made me disrespect women."
"Have you received a lap dance by one of those women?"
"Only twice. Once for my 35th birthday. Roman paid this woman to give me a private show. And again by Brucie on my 38th birthday. Brucie paid top dollar to have this stripper give me a blowjob."
"So, did that make you feel like a man?"
"Absolutely not. I was cringing the entire time. I am not a man who enjoys to pay for sex."
"Were you drunk?"
"I was at my 38th party. Really drunk. To the point where I swore only to drink occasionally after that day."
"You won't need any other woman but me to give you what you want."
He smiled fondly at me.
"I thought I was supposed to be calming you down?"
"I can't help it! I've got you under me with your good looks, hard body, and soothing voice. It's not really working."
He pulled out his phone to look at the time. The screen nearly blinded me from how bright it was. He made a displeased look when he acknowledged the time.
"It's almost 1:30 in the morning. I better get some sleep for tomorrow. I am getting butterflies in my stomach from both sides of this outcome."
He sighed deeply, trying to ease himself. I lifted myself off of him, but he remained on the couch. He had a pensive look on his face.
"Do you want to go to bed, Niko?"
His response was patting the couch cushion next to him. I sat by him, and I could almost feel the aura of deep thought surrounding him. He laid his head in my lap, and I rubbed his head to help him fall asleep.
"Poor, Niko." I smiled. No matter what the result was, I would still be by him.
He was eased into a light sleep as I continued to rub him. I stayed up as he slept, and the sun shone through the ratty blinds. He was in the same position throughout the night. I surprisingly wasn't really tired.
I stealthily put a pillow under his head, so I could make him breakfast. I kept peeking at him on the couch to make sure he wasn't having a nightmare or if he got scared when he realized I left him.
The coffee maker bubbled alive as it started making coffee. He took his coffee black I found. I could never have coffee without sugar or creamer. I cracked eggs and started making the sausage for him. I looked at the stove time.
"5 am? And you're not awake, Niko?" I asked his sleeping form.
He twitched in his sleep. He must have fallen into a deeper sleep. Then I realized Karen never came home last night. I wondered if her date went well. I'm not sure if she was one to put out so easily. I made my way to the sleeping Niko, and I gently shook him to stir him awake. To my shock, he shot himself up in a defensive pose ready to strike the mystery person. His eyes gained focus as he recoiled his fist.
"What are you doing?!" I was terrified. I thought he'd never have the idea to hit me.
"I am so sorry. I thought you were my captors. I thought they were killing me. I am sorry! I never meant to scare you. Or to even hurt you."
I stepped to him. He was about as scared as I was.
"It's okay, Niko. Do you have these night terrors often?" I tried to erase the events that played out in his head.
"Not often, but when I do, I am unpredictable. I never know who will get hit when they wake me up. It's really is best to let me wake up on my own, or set an alarm for me."
"Noted." I smile.
"I am really sorry. I never told you when I should have, but when I am with you, around you, sleeping with you, I feel at ease. This may seem cheesy, but you keep the terrors away. It's like you protect me from them."
I all of a sudden had a more stronger reason to be with him other than loving him. I was his defender against what he couldn't save himself from. I held him against my breast somehow knowing that holding him would take the terrors away. I heard him lightly purr almost as I continued to comfort him.
Then I smelled the sausages, and I left his side now that he was awake to take the sausages out of the frying pan before the apartment burned to the ground. He smiled at me as I fanned my hand when I burned myself from the grease.
"Troubles in the kitchen?" He chuckled from behind me.
"Alright, smartass. Get over here and help me." I tell him as he sat down at the table.
"I enjoy watching you. You're cute."
"As I singe my fingers on the sausage grease?"
"You're not supposed to cook your fingers." He choked back a laugh.
"I know that. Get over and help me since you're such a cook magician in here."
"Cook magician? That's a first." He said as he stood.
He looked at the stove wall and roared in laughter.
"How the hell did you get eggs all over the wall?"
"I dunno. I'm not a good cook, okay?"
"How'd you survive without me?"
"I went out a lot, and my family had a lot of get togethers. There was so much food that I often came home with food for days."
He stood over the new batch of eggs and patiently waited for them to cook. He'd sprinkle a little seasoning, and with expertise that I could never match, turned the sausages. They were perfectly cooked, and he put them on a plate for us. He then put a piece of aluminum foil over the eggs and watched the time like a hawk. It really was amazing for me to watch him cook. Probably because I was so God awful at it.
As if by perfect timing, he removed the foil and slid the eggs onto the plate.
"Breakfast is served."
Something as simple as cooking eggs and sausage, I was amazed.
"How'd you?"
"It's not that hard to do. It's really all about time. If you watch when you cook, it will turn out fine."
"That's the problem. I get distracted and easily forget what I am doing."
"And that's why there's egg on the wall." He laughed.
That earned him a sharp glare from me, and he still laughed. Even harder so.
"I think we should eat this before it gets cold."
He took the plate and poured himself and I a cup of coffee. I sat down waiting for him to join me.
Karen strolled through the door moments later when Niko and I started eating. Her demeanor looked like her date ended in disaster, and Niko and I held out mouths shut. She must have heard what we were thinking because she shot a look at us and gestured to us to shut it.
"What happened, Karen?" Niko asked with a mouth full of food. His childish way of asking made her snap into a verbal attack.
"You two stay out of it. It's not your business what I do with my life."
We ducked our heads like dogs being punished, and that made her stomp off into the bedroom where she slammed things around to vent out her frustration. We both laughed together as she carried on.
"I guess it wasn't so bad." Niko laughed.
"I'm glad I'm not in that room." I added.
The crashing and thrashing made my brother wake up, and he thought we were under attack. That only made the both of us nearly on the floor with laughter. I think I busted a lung from how hard I was laughing. Niko, on the other hand, was red in the face and had tears coming from his eyes. My brother's utter look of confusion only amplified out laughter.
This moment was exactly what the doctor ordered after one if the longest weeks the both of us ever had.
Karen came out of the bedroom freshened up with her usual business suit on. Niko kept quiet as she prepared herself something small to eat. Niko was next, and I was told there was no time for shower shenanigans. There I waited in the living room while my naked Niko was all alone. My body needed to be with him, but everytime I advanced to the bathroom, Karen stared me down back to the couch. She really was in a pissy mood.
Niko came out of the bedroom dressed in his tuxedo, and I my eyes followed his moves around the apartment.
"Do you want to go in the shower?"
"Niko, she can't come along. This is risky enough for us to be leaving these two alone."
"These two can come along with us."
"Oh okay, why don't we just gift wrap your brother and hand deliver him into the laps of those who are looking for him?"
"I prefer you on your date. Atleast I didn't have to hear your bitchy mouth."
"Watch it, Niko."
"Why can't Sharon come? She can't protect her brother on her own."
"That is simply not going to happen. She stays here." Her tone warranted no questions.
A knock on the door scared the life out of me.
"Finally."
She opened the door and there stood another man. Judging from his dark appearance with his tuxedo, he must be one of Karen's contacts.
"This is Chad. He will be protecting you two while Niko and I are at this meeting. It is unknown how long we will be, so he will be the one you'll answer to while I am away."
He invited himself inside and scoped out the area. He looked like he was all about business, and I could tell he had a chip up his ass. This wasn't going to be fun at all.
"Hello, Chad. My name is Sharon and this is my brother." I said being civil like.
"Your names mean nothing to me. I am hired to protect you. Nothing more."
"I bet you're a blast at parties."
He ignored my comment and continued to look around the apartment.
"It's time to go, Niko." She urged Niko out of the door.
"Hold on, Karen." He stopped her from pushing him out of the door.
"They are waiting inside the car for us. We don't have time for this. We are supposed to be there at 11."
"We have time for me to say goodbye." He said, working against Karen's shoving.
"Goodbye, Sharon!" He called over his shoulder when she shoved with all her might.
Once again, he was off doing things that didn't involve me.