Merlin didn't know how it happened, but two days later he wound up in the back of Morgana's car again, this time driving the almost three hours to the edge of Wales, where the venue is that Morgana had wanted to go look at. This time, Leon sat in the back with him, but he just went on his phone and the two woman sat in front talking the whole time about flower arrangements and color schemes, Merlin knew damn well, too, that he probably had a million things better he could be doing right now, but yet, here he was. Getting there took hours off of Merlin's life, as it was such a boring ride but once they finally got there some woman named Rachel with dark hair gave them a tour of the room and outdoor area Morgana had wanted to look at. It was a beautiful room, had white, creamy walls and long, crystal chandelier hanging over every table and a very large one over the dance floor, there was also a stage for a live band and then the out door area had many places to sit and a garden that had pink flowers in bloom. It was a very nice space, he didn't like it as much as Morgana and Hunith did though, because they had been crying on and off the entire time they were having the tour. What happened next was that they had to sit there for several more hours as Morgana and Hunith argued with the man who ran the building about how they needed this space on the day Morgana had already decided would be her wedding day. The man argued back for awhile saying he didn't want to overbook, but then Morgana started talking money and 'down payments' and the man changed his tune rather quickly. By the time they were leaving it was already dark out and then Morgana did that thing she did the other day and said she wanted to go to dinner instead of starting to head home. They went to a small diner and while they were in there it began to rain, really rather hard. It was then Morgana's idea to get a hotel at the Inn down the street and travel back home the following day, as Leon didn't have work and blah blah. Merlin was against the idea from the begning, he told them Gwaine wouldn't like that, even if Gwaine probably wouldn't care at all, but he just didn't want to stay there, he wanted to go home.

"Just explain to him it's late and raining," Hunith said as they reached the Inn. "He wouldn't want you to be in danger."

"No, but...-" Merlin didn't bother to finish that thought because none of them were listening to him anyway, so he just tagged along because he didn't have much choice, did he?

Merlin called Gwaine and he didn't seem to care that they planned to stay the night in Wales, even if Merlin did. The only thing the Inn had was a two bedroom suite, so they took that and put it on Uther's credit card . Hunith took one of the rooms rather quickly and retired pretty soon after arriving to the room, Merlin assumed Morgana and Leon would take the other room which left him in the sitting room to sleep, which he supposed he didn't mind too much. Leon went to bed after arguing with Merlin for a good ten minutes about who got the last room, in a gentlemen's way, Merlin supposed and then he left, too, once Merlin won this fight. But Morgana didn't budge from her spot on the sofa, where she sat next to Merlin, this sofa would end up being Merlin's bed so he did hope she got off it soon. She was running her hands through her dark, long hair and looking at Merlin with puzzlement.

"I know this is hard for you," she said without any prompt and Merlin really hoped this wouldn't be some heart to heart thing because he ate too much and he was far too tired for that. "But I'm happy you're here, I hope I don't say that too much." Merlin didn't say anything to that, because she did, and he so very much didn't want to be here yet he was for some reason. That reason being her. of course. "It might be hard for you to understand but we all really do want to be a family again, like a proper one...or as proper as we can be anyway."

"I really don't think Uther wants that, or-"

he stopped himself before he said Arthur's name and she sighed deeply. "I really don't know what Arthur wants, his pride is in the way of everything at the moment," she said and then shrugged, "He gets that from our father, and Uther well...He's stubborn and backwards, I don't care if you ever speak to him again but having a relationship with you is what your mum and I both want, more than anything. You missed so much while you were gone and I just wish...-"

Merlin looked at her and he didn't know what to say, but he thought he knew what she was trying to say. So now, he had to be very honest with her even if it hurt her. "I don't regret leaving, I was happier...better then, now I feel like I'm drowning every day and I know it will only get worse, it's how I used to feel right before I left."

"You know," Morgana said softly then, he thought she would have a bigger reaction to what he had just said, but she barely reacted at all, so maybe she already knew all that. "The night you left, your mother bagged and cried for hours that he go out and look for you, but he refused. I guess he was really offended that you screamed in his face that you were gay and then took your stuff and stormed out of his house...he says he could never forgive you for it-"

"He was the one trying to stop me from being who I was!" retorted Merlin, Morgana shook her head at him getting upset.

"I don't think you were wrong, don't think I'm saying that."

"You're not gay, you don't know how it feels to be sat down and told if you even so much as looked a guy wrong he'd throw you out, I did him a service and just left," Merlin said with anger in his voice, he hadn't really wanted to be angry tonight, but here he was. "I wouldn't have said anything at all if it wasn't for my Uncle visiting and me finding out he was gay, plus then Uther treating him like a weirdo when...Gaius is the nicest man you could ever meet, he wouldn't do a damn thing out of line."

"My father is a bastard, I can't defend him," said Morgana and he wasn't asking her to. He knew it wasn't her fault. "I just wish you hadn't thrown all of us away just because of him."

"I couldn't breathe there anymore, Morgana, I was dying..." Merlin said this and felt the overwhelming feeling he used to feel wash over him. He knew he couldn't have taken it much longer. "On top of your father, my mother treating me like baggage, and..." he shook his head, he didn't know what to say, because he couldn't say much about the Arthur situation. He sighed, "And Gwen getting pregnant, which wasn't my business I suppose, but it bothered me and-"

"You don't have to say all that, I already know all about it," Morgana informed him, and he paused and looked at her with alarm. "Arthur already told me everything...and I do mean everything," she looked smug about it and Merlin wanted to die a little bit more all of a sudden. He gulped. She looked really amused then. "Plus, I already knew before he said anything, I saw the way you looked at him...and the way he looked at you, Jesus Christ, and all your songs are about him."

"That's not true," he was quick to defend, she laughed a little. "They're not!"

"Okay, maybe not, but Barcelona is about him."

"Why would you say that?!"

"Because we went to Barcelona, you idiot!" Merlin just stared then, his eyes wide and the look of utter horror was probably written clearly on his face. She only smiled at him kindly. "It's okay..."

"No, it's not," he complained, crossing his arms. "And why would he tell you that?"

"Probably because he was feeling guilty," she admitted. "He says he broke your heart."

"Because he did," retorted Merlin. "And he did nothing but fuck with my head the entire time, he probably never loved me either, I was just a fuckin' game to him..."

"Oh, he definitely loved you," said Morgana airily. Merlin looked at her then in more alarm, yet again, and she shrugged. "You know, he came home the the night you left as well, no one slept at all, your mum was freaking out and I had to try to calm her down. And Arthur fought with our father all night, at one point he was so desperate to get him to allow you back that he promised to give up being bi."

"That is the stupidest thing I've ever heard, you can't just...do that."

"I don't know...he's not been with a guy since," said Morgana. "He also promised to get with Gwen, since Uther was being a bitch about them being out of wedlock, you can see how that turned out though. But our dad got over that pretty much as soon as Tony was born. Especially when Arthur convinced Gwen to use a Pendragon name for his name. Anthony goes way back, I think it was Uther's dad's dad's name..."

Merlin could honestly say he couldn't care less about this, even if that might be mean. "I'm glad I missed all that, even if he would have let me back, I wouldn't have come. I found where I would rather be."

"Yeah, apparently with Gwaine," Morgana rolled her eyes. "And how did that happen exactly?"

"Gwaine was there for me when I felt the most alone, I was literally homeless and he gave me a room and food, and he cared about me even when I didn't deserve it from him," said Merlin and Morgana looked at him with kindness once more. "I know I talked a lot of shit about Gwaine before that, but I wouldn't be here now without him, he's the first person who's ever made me feel at home or properly loved, and I wouldn't change that for anything." Tears were forming in Morgana's eyes now and this surprised Merlin a little. "I wasn't trying to be sappy."

"No, it's just..." She pushed her hair out of her face and dabbed her eyes with a random throw pillow on the sofa. "That's exactly how I feel about Leon!"

Merlin smiled back at these words. "I'm happy for you."

She stood up then and tried to push away her tears. "I'm sorry, I don't know why I am getting emotional, it's been happening so much lately, I have so much stress."

"Don't worry about it," Merlin told her. "We don't have to talk about this anymore," he said this with hope that it would end the conversation, he didn't want to be reliving all this anyway. "We should just head to sleep..."

"I'm glad we can be honest with each other though, that's one step closer to being a family."

Merlin didn't say anything as she headed to bed then, he wondered if she knew deep down, that Merlin could never be a real member of their family, not now...not ever. He wasn't sure if he ever really was either.

(A/N: Hello, I have had so many changes to the story and re-writes that I had to just go through the last like half of Falling to make sure Morgana and Merlin hadn't talked about 'The Arthur situation,' before, they hadn't in the final version, so yay. But I did have to change a few things in this chapter last minute so the editing probably isn't that good, I also have a terrible headache but I still wanted to post anyway. I hope you all enjoyed and I will look this over again in a day or two to make sure I fix any problems. Bye!)