"No man is great enough or wise enough for any of us to surrender our destiny to. The only way in which anyone can lead us is to restore to us the belief in our own guidance."
― Henry Miller
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31 BBY-
Rumors of a force-sensitive child on Mandalore quickly spread throughout Satine's court.
She felt the hair on the back of her neck stand on end as she walked from one place to another, the whispers of a Jedi amongst their ranks growing louder by the day. Satine remained tight-lipped about the incident in her quarters. She knew that revealing too much could put the child at risk, and she was determined to keep him safe at all costs.
Satine knew she had to act quickly and discreetly. She summoned her most trusted advisors, including the Prime Minister Almec, to a private meeting in her chambers.
Once they were all gathered, Satine spoke in a hushed tone. "There are rumors amongst this court of a force-sensitive child on Mandalore," getting straight to the point.
Almec nodded gravely. "Yes, Your Highness. The whispers have grown louder each day."
"I want these rumors squashed, Almec."
The Prime Minister of Mandalore exchanged a glance with Deputy Minister Jerec before coughing and directing his attention back to Satine. He then raised an eyebrow. "That is... easier said than done, Your Highness."
"How so, Prime Minister?"
Jerec answered. "As you're aware, a few of your palace guards, as well as your own handmaiden, were witness to this child's outburst, and – they saw what happened..."
Satine's expression turned grave as she listened to Jerec's explanation. "I see," she said, her mind racing with possibilities and potential consequences.
"We could try to contain the information, Your Highness," Jerec suggested tentatively. "Perhaps we can persuade those who witnessed it to keep quiet."
Almec spoke. "And how long do you foresee that lasting, Deputy Minister?"
"Gentlemen," Satine interrupted, "we are talking about a child here. Surely one child can't be too much trouble."
"With all due respect, Your Highness," the Prime Minister replied, "this is not just about one child. This is about the stability and safety of Mandalore. If word were to get out that a Force-sensitive child was found on our planet, it could attract unwanted attention and put us in danger."
The Duchess felt her blood boil, but she schooled her feelings and nodded slowly, understanding the gravity of the situation. "Very well. I see your point, Prime Minister. Now, what do you propose we do about it?"
32 BBY-
Satine looks for Obi-Wan following the funeral, but she's told he's gone into seclusion.
She eventually finds him in a remote area of the temple, sitting alone and meditating. She approaches Obi-Wan slowly, not wanting to startle him.
He opens his eyes and looks up at her but doesn't say anything.
Finally, Satine speaks up. "Obi-Wan, I'm so very sorry about Qui-Gon. I know how much he meant to you," She continues, then adds, with a sad sigh, "He was – well, a talented Jedi and someone I considered a great friend..."
Obi-Wan takes a deep breath and exhales slowly before speaking. "Thank you, Satine, but... Qui-Gon is gone. And I must accept that."
"You don't have to deal with this grief alone," she says softly.
For a moment, Obi-Wan remains silent, lost in his own thoughts. Then he turns his head slightly to look at her. "I appreciate your concern, Satine," he says quietly. "But this is something I must face on my own."
Satine nodded, sadly, and then a new realization dawned on her. "You blame yourself for what happened don't you? Obi-Wan, I don't doubt you did everything you could. I'm sure Qui-Gon knew that too. His death isn't on you."
Obi-Wan only offers her a sad smile.
He knows that Satine is right; he shouldn't blame himself for Qui-Gon's death. But it's hard not to feel responsible, especially when he was there with him in his final moments. Obi-Wan takes a deep breath and tries to focus on the present moment: allowing himself to relieve his mind of his guilt.
Satine quietly leaves him to his thoughts, hoping that he will find peace and solace in his own time. As she walks away, Obi-Wan closes his eyes again and returns to his meditation, attempting to center himself in the midst of grief.
31 BBY-
Satine's steps across the floor of her room are filled with uneasy restlessness as she feels the growing pressure inside of her.
She can't help but replay the events of two days ago over and over in her mind. Two very long, agonizing days of dodging questions left and right. The snoopy looks directed towards her are not particularly bothersome; it is, however, the troubled expression etched onto her child's face that sticks with her; an indelible vision engraved into the depths of her mind.
Satine was concerned that exposure of Cal's real identity could cause turmoil among her people. Even though it saddened Satine deeply, she recognized the harsh truth of the situation. She understood that coming to a decision would be an arduous task.
Reality was a bitter pill to swallow.
While walking around, Satine pauses to watch Cal and Riya playing together in the center of the room. Cal has opted for a Lhosan JY-83 speeder, while Riya has chosen the Naboo Royal N-1 starfighter, which is considered the most advanced technology used by the Naboo military. Riya occasionally imitates the engine sounds, and Cal tries to replicate her.
Satine kneels beside them and takes in the peaceful moment. Riya glances at her with a discouraged expression. The Duchess lets out a sigh. "Cal, sweetheart, - might mommy have a word for you a moment, darling?"
32 BBY-
Satine had already gone back to her guest quarters for the night and was busy packing up for her journey back to Mandalore. Her usually styled hair was now loose and flowing down her shoulders, shining in its golden hue. The outfit she had worn to the funeral was resting on a chair in the corner of the room.
The chime outside her door suddenly goes off. "Enter!" She called, turning to face the door.
She expected it to be one of her attendants bringing her something she had forgotten or perhaps a message from a visiting dignitary.
To her surprise, Obi-Wan Kenobi stepped into the room.
"Obi-Wan," Satine said in greeting, "what brings you here?"
"I came to check on you," he replied, his voice carrying a note of concern. "I know how difficult today must have been for you."
Satine smiled faintly. "Thank you, but I'm alright. It's just been a long day. It's really you I should be worried about..."
"You were right – earlier, when you asked if I blamed myself, for what happened."
She looked sad for a moment. "You shouldn't." Satine gave his hand a reassuring squeeze. "You can't blame yourself for things that are out of your control," she said softly.
Obi-Wan said nothing.
His eyes wandered over the various items scattered about, taking in the sight of Satine's belongings strewn across the bed and table.
"It looks like you're getting ready to leave," he observed.
"Yes," Satine said with a sigh. "It's time for me to return to Mandalore."
There was a moment of silence as they both stood there, unsure of what else to say.
Finally, Obi-Wan spoke up. "When will I see you again?" he asked quietly.
Satine turned to face him fully and smiled sadly. "I don't know," she admitted.
Obi-Wan nodded in understanding. He approached Satine and, after a brief hesitation, caressed her cheek with his fingers.
Although she tried not to feel exposed or succumb to him, Satine blushed and felt the warmth spread through her veins as well as her heart race when he touched her. As she gazed into Obi-Wan's eyes, Satine's breath was caught in her throat. She could see the sincerity there, and it made her heart ache.
"I'm sorry," he said softly, his grey-blue eyes locking onto hers. "I never meant to make you feel uncomfortable."
"It's not your fault," she whispered, barely able to keep her voice steady. "It's just..."
She wanted to tell her deepest secret
- that she departed Coruscant some months prior carrying a child in her womb. She wanted to tell him about the boy she gave birth to just a few months ago. She wanted to tell him that Cal looked just like him.
But Satine schooled her thoughts. Instead, she let out a sigh and gently removed his hand from beside her face.
"I - I should get some sleep," she said, sadly.
Obi-Wan smiled. "Very well. Duchess." He bowed low then walked out.
Satine watched him go, her heart aching with the weight of her secret. She knew she couldn't keep it from him forever, but for now, it was safer to keep it hidden.
As she lay down on her bed, Satine closed her eyes and let out a deep sigh. She couldn't help but wonder what would have happened if she had told Obi-Wan about their son. Would he have stayed with her? Would they have raised Cal together?
But it was too late for those questions now.
With that thought in mind, Satine finally allowed herself to drift off into a fitful sleep, hoping that one day, Obi-Wan could know the truth about their son.
31 BBY-
The toddler lifts his head, eyes widened with curiosity. He crawls over. She scoops him up close, seating him on her lap. Satine combs her fingers through his thin ginger hair while she stifles the sob caught in her throat.
Cal observes his mother's sorrow and wrinkles his brows. He questions, "Mommy sad?" He adopts a gentle tone and expression as he notices that the woman who is usually resolute now appears fragile, leaving him puzzled.
Satine nods, a single tear streaming down her face. "Yes, sweetie. Mommy is feeling a little sad right now." She takes a deep breath and continues, "But it's okay to feel sad sometimes. It means we're human and that we care about things."
Cal looks up at his mother with big blue eyes filled with understanding beyond his years. He reaches for her face, gently wiping away her tears with chubby fingers.
" – no, no sad... " he says, softly.
She takes a moment to compose herself before continuing, "Sometimes life can be tough, and things don't always go the way we want them to. But it's important to remember that we're never alone in our sadness."
Cal nods solemnly, taking his mother's words to heart. He may not fully understand why his mother is sad, but he knows that love and support can help ease her pain.
Satine kisses the top of Cal's head and pulls him into another embrace.
"I love you, Cal. You're my little hero," Satine whispers, holding her son tightly.
Cal smiles softly and wraps his arms around his mother. " - love, Mommy."
The two sit in silence for a few moments, taking comfort in each other's presence. Finally, Satine speaks up again.
"You promise to be brave for mommy?"
He nods softly. "I pwomise!"