A/N: How the heck and I gonna end this thing... -sigh- It keeps going! lol Enjoy!

Lost

Chapter 8: Love and Lamentations

It had been two days before Ben was showing signs of healing properly. The bacta patches were certainly helping. He didn't feel pain anymore; just discomfort from the wounds. She stayed by his side the whole time, only leaving long enough to bring him food and drink. They slept together, Rey at his bedside for the first night and then ultimately in the same bed with him the next. He'd gotten used to her presence as of late. It lulled him to sleep and stirred up emotions in him he never thought were possible. They didn't speak about the First Order or where to go from here. He had a feeling she already knew staying here wasn't an option for him. And she seemed to be all right with that. She wasn't going to question any of that. Through their bond, they knew that they both wanted to be together, wherever that may be.

Ben lay in bed, staring down at the woman curled up in his arms. He used his free hand to gently caress her cheek, pushing the hair from her face. She moved only slightly, closer to him as her face was buried in his chest, head resting on his arm. He gave her a small smirk. Where would he be without her? Well, that was an obvious answer, he supposed. He'd still be lost to Snoke and the First Order. They'd probably be fighting each other till the death at some point. He'd probably be too stubborn to admit his feelings for her or to give her a chance.

But none of that mattered. The fact of the matter was... he was here with her now. He only wished he'd broken down sooner. Then, they'd be together a lot sooner than now. He probably wouldn't have killed so many people. His father would still be... He stopped that thought as his body fell still. If he'd come to his senses sooner... his father would be alive. He quickly pushed that thought from his head. If she were awake, he'd tell him to stop thinking about that and that he was misled at the time. He was in a dark spot... He didn't really realize the repercussions of his actions. At the time, it didn't matter if he had no father or mother. He was only focused on the power to deal with what he needed to when he needed to. He didn't once consider the possibility of turning. But she threw a wrench into all of that. She dragged him back. She saved him. If only she'd come along sooner... If only he'd not been so stubborn and resistant to what was in front of him.

He felt a delicate kiss on his chest and it snapped him from his reverie. He looked down at her and saw her looking up at him sternly. He could only smirk in return. He knew what she was thinking; it was written all over her face. She was silently chastising him. "How are you feeling?"

"Better," he said as he gently played with her hair. He saw her cheeks light up like wildfire when she realized exactly how close they were and the intimacy of their position. He felt her thoughts racing to what they did and her not remembering. He snickered. "We didn't do anything but sleep, Rey. Calm down."

She let out a small sigh in acknowledgment. "Get out of my head..."

He grinned down at her as he cupped her jaw and pulled her head up to look at him. His eyes shone with intensity as he leaned closer to her. "I think I'll live there rent free for a while," he teased as he placed his lips against hers. She melted into the kiss instantly, her arm wrapping around his neck as they deepened their kiss. His hand slid down to her waist, pulling her against him. Before they knew it, he was hovering above her, hand on her hip, her hands tangled in his hair.

"Ahem!" Both of their eyes shot open, faces redder than a sith saber, darting over to the intruder. Of all people, it had to be his mother. He groaned and flopped back onto the bed, silently cursing her through their bond, making Rey chuckle a little. "As nice as it is to see that you two are getting along... Surely, you could find a better spot to do that in."

"S-sorry, Leia," Rey said timidly. Ben didn't bother to apologize. As far as he was concerned, it was Leia's fault for interrupting.

Leia only grinned and sighed as she entered the room. "Ever heard of knocking, mother?" Ben said nonchalantly.

"Not when it's my ship; no."

Ben only rolled his eyes at that. Rey quickly sat up, and she would have gotten up, too, had Ben not grabbed her wrist and pulled her back. She blushed profusely, looking at Leia for help. The older woman just shook her head and took Rey's seat in the chair. "I'd ask if you're feeling better, but I think we all know the answer to that." Rey hid her face in her hands, positively mortified, while Ben just snickered.

"What business do you have with me?" Ben asked, knowing it was time to talk.

Leia sighed as she glanced back and forth at the two. "I would like you to consider staying."

Rey's eyes widened. Really? Leia wanted him to stay?! "No," Ben said curtly.

"Why not?"

"You know the answer to that."

"They won't do anything to you-"

"Because I'd kill them if they did."

Leia and Ben stared hard at each other. Rey felt awkward. She was literally in the middle of a family spat. She didn't know if she should interject or if she should remain silent. But it was definitely awkward. "Ben... you carry a lot of guilt. But I assure you that if you stay,-"

"What? We'll all hold hands and sing kumbaya together? That we'll all just act like the last couple of years never happened? You're more delusional than I thought, mother."

Rey and Leia both flinched at that one. They both realized he sounded just like Han. "Ben... don't be so mean..."

Ben frowned at Rey's words. "She honestly thinks that everything will be ok if I stay. It won't be, Rey. Everyone will keep nagging her to imprison me or kill me. Everyone already hates me. Why do I want to live in an environment where everyone wants me dead? Again."

Rey shrank a little as she looked up at him. Leia knew not to interfere when they were having their own conversation. "I know we want to go to that other planet... but you have to realize that she hasn't seen you since the incident with Luke. She misses you, Ben. Can't you at least give her a chance?"

"It's not her that I would give the chance to; it's everyone else." Ben frowned as he looked down at her, fear in his eyes.

Leia cleared her throat once more. "Forgive me, son... I know this is different for you. I should be more aware of your feelings. It was selfish of me to ask you to stay. To be honest, I can't guarantee that everyone here will accept you. I would like for you to try, but I also don't want to push you. Just know that if you ever decide to come back, you're always welcome. Both of you are."

Ben looked at his mother for a long moment. "Be honest with her, Ben."

He looked down at Rey again and sighed as he looked back to his mother. "I'm... not comfortable staying here yet. Let things calm down and we'll see." Leia's face held a sort of sadness to it, but she nodded nonetheless.

"Give her an in between option," Rey pushed.

"But... maybe we can keep in touch in the meantime...?"

Leia gave her son a warm smile. "I would like that very much." Ben nodded awkwardly. "Right then. I'll make sure you have provisions stocked up in your ship and that it's ready for your departure whenever you're ready." She stood up in her frail age and sighed as she looked over at Ben. She leaned over Rey and kissed his forehead with a small smile. "I'm glad you came, Ben."

Ben gave his mother a small grin that reminded her so much of Han. She left the room and Ben looked down at Rey. He flipped them to where she was pinned to the bed with a mischievous smirk. "Now... where were we?" Her eyes widened and her face lit up dark red.