A/N: Hope you guys are still there! I still plan to continue the ABCs writing prompt. Unfortunately, that means I'll be slower at updating Idiot: Ben, but I do plan on finishing that one as well. For now, let's focus on a happy ending for this one. Sorry in advance for butchering some characters in this chapter. It was necessary to the story.

Lost

Chapter 15: Lie

No sooner that Rey left the room that Poe and Finn turned their attention to Ben. Poe stared accusingly at him while Finn stared with uncertainty. At first, Ben tried to ignore it. He had nothing to say and he had nothing to defend. Ben only sighed as he sat back down on the bed silently. He stared at the floor, running through his head the options. He obviously couldn't stay here; there's too many eyes and he was sure that they would eventually all rally together to lock him up, claiming he was a danger to them all.

Without him realizing it, his hand went up to his face, holding his chin as he thought more on the subject. He was broken from his thoughts at hearing Poe scoff on the other side of the room. His dark eyes flicked over to him in irritation. "You two are just alike," he said with a sigh, walking over to the couch to plop down. Ben kept staring at him, wondering what he meant by that comment, but every time he ran a situation through his head it irritated him more with the arrogant pilot.

"Uh... Poe?" Finn said as he cleared his throat. Poe looked over at his friend. "What did you mean by that?"

"Hm? Oh. Just that when Rey's thinking, she touches her face, too. I noticed he does the same thing. So... either he's copying Rey... or it was an honest mannerism. I haven't determined which it is yet." Poe finished his talk with a grin. And for some reason, Ben could imagine himself decking him. Square in the jaw. Teeth flying out of his stupid mouth.

Ben shook his head silently, quickly dismissing that thought. Anger led to darkness. He wouldn't allow even a single inch to take root. Not now. Not when he'd fought so hard to get rid of it. "So is that your plan, Dameron? To watch me until Rey gets back?"

"Trust me, pal, I'd do anything else right now if you could be trusted."

"Poe!" Finn said in a hushed voice. "Stop instigating!"

"Oh, calm down, Finn. What is he going to do? Prove me right?"

"Poe-"

"You know what, Dameron? I will prove you right. The truth is, I've thought about smashing your face in several different times with about seven different things in this room."

"Ah, see-"

"But I haven't. Have I? Why do you think that is?" Ben chided irritably.

"Well, because Rey would probably have something to say about it. And she's not exactly kind when she's mad," the pilot chuckled.

Ben nodded quietly with a small grin. "And you think I'm scared of Rey?"

Poe scoffed and let out a loud laugh. "Well, who isn't when she's mad?"

Ben snickered. "It sounds to me..." Ben stood up and stretched his aching muscles. "That Poe Dameron hasn't learned to be a man yet." Poe glared at him and Ben could feel the palpable anger rolling off of him in waves. "You're just angry that she chose me over you."

"No, Kylo Ren. I'm angry because you aren't turning her away when she's clearly misguided about who has her best interests at heart. And why would you have her best interests at heart? You're just trying to take advantage of her and cart her off to who knows where-"

Ben's eyes narrowed at the name. Truth was, he'd long since stopped listening to anything coming out of this arrogant piece of work's mouth the moment he called him Kylo Ren. Now, he was just trying to control his anger. He didn't want to throw the first punch, but if he could get Poe to... He shook that thought from his mind. He felt her reaching out through their connection, but he wouldn't allow her entry. He didn't want her to know what was going on. These were her friends. Obviously, if she saw something in them, he would need to try to as well. He didn't want to be the reason she couldn't be friends with them. He wasn't going to be the cause of any issues.

Oh, but it would feel so good just to crack him once. Just once. Once is all it would take. Before he realized it, Poe was in front of his face, waving his hand in front of his face. Ben blinked a few times. "You okay there, Ren? You spaced out on me. Is the sound of my voice too dreamy for you?"

Ben rolled his eyes. "Quite the opposite actually. It's an irritating sound. Like nails across metal."

Poe snickered and glared up at him, bowing up just a little, refusing to back down. "That's not what Rey says. You know, I heard she likes the sound of my voice."

"Then maybe I do need to question her choices because if she enjoys the sound of your voice... she quite possibly may be either deaf... or too nice to tell you that you're just an arrogant, worthless moron that thinks way too highly of himself." Poe's brows fell to a very angry glare. "So... which is it, Dameron? And... before you answer... keep in mind that whatever you say about my woman will come with consequences."

Poe growled and before he knew it, he flung his fist as hard as he could square in Ben's jaw. Ben stumbled back just a hair, but all he could do was laugh. "There we go," he said as he threw a punch at Poe, clocking him square in the jaw in retaliation.

"Ben! Stop it!" Rey screamed from the doorway.

Ben stopped everything he was doing and glared at the unconscious Poe Dameron laid out on the ground like a sack of bricks. He could already see the swelling in the man's face from where he hit him. Rey ran to Poe's side and looked down at him, gently touching his forehead and his jaw where Ben clocked him. She looked up at him with uncertainty. "Why did you hit him?!"

Ben frowned quietly, but refused to answer. How could he tell her that Poe was instigating him? What he said about him? What he said about her? He couldn't do that to her. He only shook his head and sat back down on the bed they'd shared just prior to all of this. Rey groaned in frustration. "Finn, what happened!?" Rey growled, looking to her friend to tell her the truth.

Finn looked over at Ben, then down at Poe and sighed heavily. "They got in each other's face and-"

"Finn, who threw the first punch?" Rey said irritably. Ben glanced over at Finn for a moment, all anger gone from his face. So it came down to this. She's relying on her friend to tell her what happened because he didn't answer her. Finn started to sweat from the stress of being put in this position. He didn't want to get Poe in trouble, but he also didn't want to hurt Rey with a lie. "Finn!"

Finn jumped back to reality and looked down at Poe before his eyes landed on Rey's face. "He did," he said as he pointed at Ben.

Ben felt his anger resurfacing all over again. But he couldn't be surprised. After all, he was the bad guy. He'd always be the bad guy. He was the one who caused issues for everyone all the time. Why would he expect anything different? He shook his head as he stood from his seat. He shouldn't expect anything different. And he wouldn't. Ever again. He walked to the door and paused briefly when he heard Rey start speaking to him. "Ben... Why?"

He glanced over his shoulder for a moment. He couldn't even look at her. He turned back around and started to walk again. "It doesn't matter." He walked down the hallway swiftly, barely keeping his anger and hurt and turmoil contained. He passed by his mother, who had been making her way to the bridge with all the racket. She stopped mid-step as he rushed past her. He couldn't bring himself to look at her either. He'd come here for no reason. He'd expected too much. And he was sorely reminded of that when Finn chose to lie.

He darted out of the hallway and into a room Leia had agreed would be his while they were staying there. He quickly went inside and leaned against the door, his thoughts getting the better of him as he closed his eyes and leaned his head back against the door. He allowed his fist to slam into the door angrily, a quiet curse leaving his lips. He had to leave.

He peeled himself off of the door and looked around the room briefly. He really didn't have anything except the clothes on his back and a few books that he was using to track down that planet. His frown deepened as he lifted the book where he'd finally located it. He was going to ask her to come with him back to that planet. He was going to ask her to...

That doesn't matter anymore. He threw the book aside and decided to leave everything. He'd grab a few clothes, but nothing else. Certainly not the Kylo Ren mask he'd inadvertently brought with him. It served its use on some of the bases, but... it had no purpose now. He glared at it with contempt. He'd given up everything.

For what? To be made into an untrustworthy person? To be made the scapegoat for a worthless, arrogant piece of sh-

"Ben?" He broke from his reverie for moment when he heard her voice on the other side of the door. His brows knitted together as he stood frozen in spot. He didn't want to face her. Not when she thought the worst of him. Again. It threw him back to their early interactions. He was a monster. He should have known better than to think she'd fully trust him. But he still had hope she would. "Ben... I know you're in there. Please, I... I need to talk to you."

Ben flung the door open, glaring down at her. "You didn't want to talk before. Why now?" Rey visibly flinched at his tone, understanding all the hurt that was poured out in such a short time. "This was a mistake. I'm leaving," he said as he pushed past her.

She grabbed his wrist, causing him to stop momentarily. "Ben, don't." He snatched his hand away from her and glared back at her. "I'm sorry! I-"

"I don't want to hear it. It doesn't matter."

"Ben, it does! It-"

"No, it doesn't!" he thundered, rounding on her fully, a menacing glare in his eyes. But what his face was saying wasn't what their link was saying. She knew he was hurting and now he was lashing out. She only wished he'd let her in. "If it mattered, you would have known the truth!"

"Are you saying Finn lied then?!"

"That's exactly what I'm saying! You just don't want to see it!" he hissed back at her. There was an awkward silence between them then. Ben was caught in his emotions and Rey was shocked trying to process everything. He felt her gently prodding at their connection at the same time she took his hand in hers. He tried to pull his hand back, but she held tight to it as she pushed at their connection a little harder. "Rey-"

"Give me a chance..." she whispered through their link. "Please?" Ben sighed and nodded, allowing her access to his mind. She searched through his mind and watched the replay of the interaction with Poe. As she searched his thoughts, he watched the emotions play out on her face. She went from anger with what Poe said, anger with how mad Ben got, hurt from Poe speaking that way about her, embarrassment from them both acting petty... but he couldn't read the last emotion. Regret? Gratefulness? Her cheeks flushed at the last thing Ben said about her, but she still held onto his hand. Was he take that as he wasn't disgusted? Once everything concluded, he closed the connection down and stood in silence. "I'm sorry," she whispered.

"Like I said, it doesn't matter." Anger was gone from his tone. He just seemed apathetic. Rey frowned quietly. She shoved him back into his room and shut and locked the door behind them. He sat down on his bed in evident confusion. "Rey, what are-"

"Stop it!" Ben stared at her quietly, knowing there was more to come. "Stop... saying it doesn't matter. It does, Ben. And..." She reached out to gently hold his hands in her own, staring down at him. "I'm... so sorry I made you feel that way. I should have asked you what happened. I-"

"Then why didn't you?" It was a simple question. But it didn't make it sting less. He was right. Why didn't she ask? Did she just assume he did that? Worse yet... did she believe he hadn't really changed? "I'll tell you why, Rey." Her eyes met his, tears already welling up in them. He gently wiped her unfallen tears. "Because you don't think that I've changed." Tears began to fall when he voiced her fears. "Not yet," he said, wiping them all away delicately.

"Ben, I'm so sorry," she cried. "I want to believe you've changed. I don't know why I didn't believe it."

Ben gently pulled her into his arms, cradling her against him as he tried to comfort her. He rubbed her back affectionately, sighing into her hair as she sobbed into his chest. "No one will believe I've changed, Rey. I told you that."

"But I should have!"

"But you didn't!" he hissed back. She stilled in his arms. "It doesn't matter, Rey. You said you should have, but you didn't. You can't change what's already happened. So let it go." Rey nodded silently, realizing that she was making it about her when he was the one hurting. She wrapped her arms around him tightly as she gently kissed the side of his face. Ben gave her a small smirk. "What was that for?"

Rey smiled warmly. "I'll never doubt you again."

Ben grinned at her. "Never say never, Rey." She smiled at him and shrugged. He leaned closer to her, lips barely touching hers before she pulled away.

"I'll never kiss you again, then."

He searched her eyes for a moment before realizing she was playing with him. With a grin, he flipped them so she was lying on her back on the bed and he was hovering above her. "We'll see about that," he said as he gently kissed her cheek and worked his way down her jaw, trailing his lips down to her neck. She writhed beneath him, her face heating up with each kiss to her already heated skin. "Still never?"

She let out a breathy sound, but wouldn't answer. She gently pushed against him, but he grabbed her hands and pinned them above her head on the bed. "Ben-"

"Never?" he teased through their link. She grunted in irritation, eliciting a chuckle from Ben. "Whenever you're ready to give up on never, let me know." He playfully nipped her neck, making her shudder under his ministrations. He chuckled quietly against her skin before bringing his lips up to her ear. "I love you, Rey," he whispered with a small grin.

Her whole body froze when she heard those words. Her breath hitched in her chest for the briefest of seconds. Silence befell them as he stayed where he was, not daring to move. She could only imagine his face. She could only imagine her face. "Ben-"

"You don't need to respond. I know it's... not ideal... but I wanted to tell you anyway." His voice was the gentlest she's ever heard. It made it impossible for her to respond. He still stayed where he was though. He didn't move. It was as if he were trying to get his emotions under control before he faced her.

"Ben... look at me," she said softly. He hesitantly raised his head to look at her, a slight pink tinging his cheeks. She smiled softly up at him. She sensed the uneasiness rolling off of him. She didn't need their link to feel it. Truth was, he was so adorable at the moment. She raised her head up to close the distance between them, her lips finding his easily.

When he didn't respond after a few moments, she got her hands free and wrapped her hands in his hair. Ben's eyes widened a fraction as he caught himself on his arm by her head. It took a few moments for him to realize what was happening, but once he did, he smirked into the kiss. "Never say never," he teased as he kissed her back with reckless abandon.

She giggled softly as they pulled apart. As she searched his eyes, she smiled contently. "I love you, Ben," she whispered back. He felt his lips twitch into a real smile as he looked down at her. Whatever breath was in her lungs promptly left at such a beautiful sight. "Wow," she whispered.

"What an accomplishment. I never get a 'wow' from you," he teased with his usual grin.

"Never say never, Ben," she teased. He pinched her butt playfully, earning a squeak in surprise. "Hey!"

They both laughed as their lips crashed together again.