A/N: One more chapter after this one should do it and then I'll be working on a different story that I've wanted to write for a long time since I started this ABC writing prompt.

Lost

Chapter 16: Leaving

Weeks passed since they confessed to each other. They'd sat down to discuss where they would go now that the First Order was completely gone. Leia suggested Chandrilla. Ben suggested the planet they'd discovered together. Rey was still undecided. Both sounded like viable options, but in all honesty, she didn't really care where they went. Just that they were together. But today was the day they decided!

"Rey, where's my shirt?" Rey turned around and stuck her tongue out at him. Ben smirked at her, rolling his eyes. "You do know I can't walk around the ship shirtless, right?"

"Why not? Scared Poe will want to take another swing at you because you're better built?"

Ben grinned. "Tell him that. Just so I can see his face." Rey playfully punched his arm. "Seriously though. I need my shirt." Rey grinned and shook her head. "Am I going to have to take it off of you again?"

Rey's eyes widened as she started to retreat into the room more. He menacingly advanced on her, but this game of cat and mouse continued until Rey's back was against a wall. "Don't be indecent, Ben," she scolded as her face spoke different volumes.

Ben grinned at her. "Indecency stopped being a thing two weeks ago." Rey rolled her eyes at him. He gently pressed his lips to hers, fingers fumbling with the hem of his shirt on her hip. She shuddered under his touch as she always did since the first time. He trailed his fingers up, dragging the shirt up as he went. She let out a soft sigh into the kiss, encouraging him to keep going.

A loud knock sounded at the door, making Rey jump under his touch as they broke the kiss. Ben mentally groaned, silently vowing to murder whoever was on the other end of that door. He turned his attention back to her for a brief moment. "Stay here. I plan on getting my shirt back," he said as he kissed her one more time. She smiled and plopped on the bed, waiting for him to deal with whoever was on the other side of the door.

He hit the button to open the door, revealing Finn standing there. His eyes narrowed at the liar. "What do you want?" Ben wasn't too nice to him, nor did he need to be. Especially with how they left things.

Finn cleared his throat and nervously scratched the back of his neck. "I-I wanted to apologize. For lying."

"Guilty conscience?" Ben asked as he glared at him.

Finn nodded quietly. "I shouldn't have lied... I'm sorry for causing you trouble."

Ben stood still for a moment before nodding at Finn. "I understand why you did it... but if you set me up again, I'll make sure they don't find your body."

Finn gave him a small smile and nodded his understanding. Rey bounced over to Ben and hooked her arm around Ben's, smiling at Finn. "Are you guys good now?"

Finn's eyes roamed over her body before Ben cleared his throat in irritation. "Yes, for now... but if Finn doesn't realize your eyes are up here, he'll be taking an extended trip where no one can find him." The ex-storm trooper cleared his throat nervously before nodding and walking backwards.

"Good to see you, Rey." Finn rushed off, leaving the two to watch curiously.

Rey looked up at him accusingly. "Did you really need to be so threatening to him?"

Ben looked down at her, eyes roving all over as if to emphasize a point. "I don't think I was threatening enough."

"Ugh, Ben!"

Ben shut the door and pinned her against it with a grin. "If I saw you answer the door dressed as you are, I can't say I wouldn't be having thoughts myself." Rey blushed as she rolled her eyes at him. "You roll your eyes, but you don't think like a man."

"Fair," she replied with a small shrug. "But there's still one problem..." Ben quirked a brow at her. She leaned closer to him with a grin of her own. The same grin that made him want to kiss the life out of her every time he saw it. "I'm still wearing your shirt," she whispered.

Ben grabbed at the shirt once more, yanking it over her head and tossing it aside. Their lips collided once more and no sooner did another knock come at the door. Ben growled angrily, glaring daggers at the door. Rey couldn't help but laugh at his eagerness, but felt slightly disappointed, too. She grabbed his face, holding it lovingly as she kissed his lips once more. "Later, Ben," she promised as she sauntered off to actually go get dressed in her own clothes.

Ben snatched his shirt from the bed and slipped it on his head just as another knock came at the door. "One more time and I'll break your wrist!" he growled, opening the door quickly to reveal Poe standing there. "Better yet, why don't I just break it now for the principle of it?"

Poe glared at him and released a heavy sigh. "I came to apologize. I shouldn't have said what I said, nor should I have thrown the first punch. So I wanted to say I'm sorry."

Ben observed Poe for a moment after the apology. "I'm sure that bruised your ego."

Poe glared at him. "Great. I come to apologize and you mock me."

"It's only right. I mean you did swing first," he said with a shrug. Poe shrugged. "Swung like a girl, but still swung first."

The arrogant pilot glared at him harder. He opened his mouth to say something, but Rey came up behind Ben, wrapping her arms around his waist with a small smirk. "I think you've damaged his ego enough, Ben."

Poe's eyes widened at the sight of Rey hanging all over Ben as if it were natural. "It could stand to take a few more hits, I think."

Rey smirked as she leaned up to Ben's face. "I love the sound of your voice," she purred, placing a small kiss on his lips. "Too much?"

"A little... but it's worth it."

Poe cleared his throat. "Well... I apologized so I'll-"

"You apologized to me. But you haven't apologized to Rey," Ben said, turning a hard glare at him.

"Apologize for what?" Poe asked innocently.

"Are we really going to act like you're innocent? Do I need to remind you of what you said?" Ben asked in disbelief.

"I think my favorite was 'she's clearly misguided about who has her best interests at heart,'" Rey chimed in as she glared at Poe. Poe visibly flinched when she said that. "Or, how about when you said that you heard I liked the sound of your voice?" She crossed her arms over her chest as she glared at the man in front of her. "You know... I consider you a good friend, Poe. But if you're saying things about me behind my back like that... I don't know if we can be friends."

"I didn't mean to hurt you, Rey. I was just shooting off at the mouth."

"Well, if you're going to shoot off at the mouth, leave my name out of it," she hissed.

Poe nodded his head silently, which was different for the pilot. But Ben noticed that it wasn't unwanted. He uttered a small apology before retreating down the hall, tail between his legs. Ben glanced down at Rey, who still stood with her arms crossed as she huffed out a sigh of irritation. "I hate to say it... but Dameron was right." Rey glanced up at him curiously. "He said you're not kind when you're angry," he teased.

"I thought I was kind enough," she said with a shrug.

Ben smirked as he pushed her back into his room, kissing her fervently. She giggled playfully before punching his chest. He gently caressed her cheek. "I love you."

Rey smiled softly. "I love you, too." They shared one last kiss before finally leaving the room, hand in hand. They walked through the hallway, making their way to the bridge to speak with Leia.

X~X~X~X~X~X~X~X~X~X~X~X~X

"It's nice to see you two getting along well," Leia commented as she sipped her tea. Ben sat stiffly on the couch, Rey next to him for support as she gently held his much larger hand in her own. She gave Leia a small smile. "I must say, Ben... I didn't know what to expect after you knocked out Poe a few weeks ago. But I'm glad to see that nothing really came of it." Ben nodded uneasily, feeling like he was about to get scolded for punching his lights out. Leia chuckled under her breath. "Just like your father. He'd always be quick to react whenever I was brought into the argument or insulting contest."

"He-"

Leia held up her hand with a knowing smile. "I already know what happened. Finn came clean. How he lied to cover for Poe, how Poe was instigating you to try to get you in trouble, the fight between you and Rey... I know about all of it." Ben remained silent, nodding curtly. "You should know by now that there's not a thing-"

"There's not a thing that goes on around here that I don't know about. Yes I know," he said with a sigh. "I remember you saying that to..." He pressed his lips into a thin line at the thought of his father. The father he killed with his very own hands. The father that didn't get a chance to see that Ben changed for the better, just like Han tried to get him to do. He'd be lying if he said he didn't regret what he'd done, but it was all just situated around bad timing and bad influences. "Anyway..." he said, trying to push through it as Rey gently rubbed her thumb across the back of his hand. "We came to tell you that we'll be leaving soon."

Leia hesitated, eyes widening for a fraction of a moment as she nodded and set her tea down. "Ah... Well, I can't say I'm surprised. I expected you wouldn't stay. I'm surprised you've stayed this long, quite frankly." She looked over at her son, his eyes still on the floor as if he was too scared to look his own mother in the face. "Ben," she called out to him, trying to get his attention. He flicked his dark eyes up to her face for a split second, then back down at the floor, causing the older woman to sigh. "Son... if you're going to raise a family of your own, you have to learn to keep your head up. The past is in the past. Don't live in it; live through it. Don't make the same mistakes you made before. Just keep going, stronger, smarter, more determined than before so you don't make them again. Do you understand?"

It was the first time in years that he'd heard his mother speak so consolingly to him. He didn't know how to feel about it. He supposed there were mixed emotions going through his head. Either way he looked at it though, he was grateful for the advice. And he realized she was right. He let out a deep sigh he didn't know he'd been holding back and nodded his head quietly. He slowly corrected his posture, as if trying to get used to having his confidence back. He was in an odd phase of life right now. He didn't want to come across as too confident, but he also didn't know if he should be confident. He was so worried to make any mistakes that he wasn't really focused on much else. He'd made a lot of mistakes already! The last thing he wanted to do was to screw up the one good thing in his life and push her away, too. He glanced over at Rey to see her eyes shining with pride. And as if that was all the boost he needed, he looked at his mother and nodded.

Leia smiled warmly at her son. For a moment, he thought he saw tears threatening to spill over, but she quickly tamped down that emotion. "So, have you two decided where you're going?"

Rey beamed at the question. "Chandrilla."

Leia's eyes widened at the mention of the name. She looked over at Ben, as if willing herself to breathe. "I thought you said... you'd never return there?" Her voice was smaller than anyone was used to hearing.

Rey glanced up at Ben to see him staring at his mother, searching for the words he wanted to use. She gave him a reassuring squeeze, returning her smile to Leia. "I did," he finally answered. Leia stared at him incredulously, waiting for an explanation. "Circumstances-... no... people change. This is no different."

Leia gave him a warm motherly smile. "People do change." Rey could sense the warm affection radiating off of Leia and the awkward reception from Ben. She almost felt like she needed to get up and leave, but then Leia continued. "Ahem.. so, since you're going there..." She hesitated as she lifted her cup of tea again, shrugging with a small smile. "Your father and I had a house built while we were there... for you... for when you grew up and were ready to be on your own." Ben's sight shot over to her curiously. She held up her hand at him as if to wave him off. "It's nothing close to where we used to live. I knew you wouldn't want to live too close to your parents, so we set you up on your own area-"

"Thank you, mother," Ben said with a small grin.

For a moment, the air left Leia's lungs as she felt she was staring straight at Han. She watched as Rey threw her arms around Ben and kissed his cheek. She smiled as she watched the two interacting together, knowing that they'd be all right. "So when did you say you were leaving?" she asked as she sipped her tea.

Rey cleared her throat as she realized she'd need to give the two space. "Talk to her, Ben. You can't leave her like this. Whatever happened... you need to clear it up before we leave." He glanced over at her, brief fear flashing in his eyes like a scared, lost little boy. "I'm going to go pack up the room. Come find me when you're done?" He silently nodded his head. She kissed his cheek softly and smiled as she walked over to Leia and gave her a hug. "I'm going to pack." Leia nodded and with that, Rey was gone.

"Do you love her, Ben?"

Ben's eyes darted over to her to see that classic Leia smirk on her lips, looking at him through her lashes knowingly. He scoffed with a small grin. "Did you love dad?"

"This isn't about me, son," she replied.

He snickered and shrugged. "If I didn't... do you think I would have spent all this time trying to make things right?"

She laughed under her breath as she took another sip. "How are you making things right?"

"I disbanded the First Order, destroyed the remaining bases that could pose a threat to the galaxy, controlled my temper so I didn't kill Dameron-"

"Oh, that was control?" she teased.

Ben glared at her. "Yes, it was. If I hadn't controlled myself, I would have killed him for what he said."

"And what did he say that angered you to the point of even thinking about killing the best pilot we have?"

He pressed his lips into a thin line as he relived the day. "He insulted Rey. He used her as an object to try to goad me into throwing the first punch."

Leia shook her head and laughed. "You really are your father's son." Ben scoffed from the couch, plopping backwards as he crossed his arms over his chest. "You know, if anyone had insulted me, he would have wrung their necks. Probably would have had Chewie snatch their arms off and feed them to a Rankor, too," she chuckled, shaking her head.

"You keep talking about him."

She froze for a moment before setting her tea down in front of her again. "I suppose I am."

"What do you need to say to me?" Leia remained silent. Ben sighed in aggravation as he leaned forward, forearms on his knees, glaring at the floor. "I miss him, too. I should never have done it. I was... stupid... and misguided... and... arrogant." Ben's voice started to crack as he regretted the past. Leia hesitantly got up and walked over to sit next to her son. "I will never be able to bring back those I've killed, but I can try really hard not to kill anyone else. I can't reverse the effects of the First Order, but I can try really hard to make sure they don't come back stronger. I can't... I can't win against the darkness, but I can try really hard to keep fighting." His mother gently rubbed his back with a heavy sigh. "Forgiveness is something I know I don't deserve. From anyone. And I know that, but..." He pressed his lips into a thin line as he sighed and shook his head. "But Rey is the only one that's treated me like I have a chance to be something-... to be someone better. So, when you asked me if I love her..." He turned his attention to Leia then, that haughty determination only a Solo could carry and wear well plastered all over his face. "I love her more than words could ever describe. All these changes, all these discomforts I've had to bear... she's been the catalyst for it all."

X~X~X~X~X~X~X~X~X~X~X~X~X

As she was packing things in the room, she hesitated when she felt their connection open up. She heard the whole conversation between him and Leia. She only supposed he wanted to broadcast for emotional support, but as she listened to the conversation, she found herself sitting on their bed, listening intently. She giggled when Leia mentioned the part about Chewie, but then she felt the emotions swirling within him and it nearly knocked the breath out of her.

She listened to him speaking with Leia. She felt his emotions. The raw negativity and overwhelming regret that drove her to tears. But as she listened to his resolve, she couldn't help but smile affectionately. He was not the same Ben as when they first met. He'd changed. He'd grown as a person. And it only made her love him even more. She leaned back against the wall, eyes closed as she listened to his voice in her head, a small tired smile on her lips. "Rey is the only one that's treated me like I have the chance to be something... to be someone better. So when you asked me if I love her... I love her more than words could ever describe. All these changes, all these discomforts I've had to bear... she's been the catalyst for it all."

Her eyes opened as tears fell down her cheeks. "Broadcasting," she whispered to him through their connection.

She could feel the smile through their connection. "Oh, I know. Some things are just easier to say when you're not here. But they still need to be said."

Rey smiled and shook her head. "So I do make you nervous then?"

"Nervous as hell, Rey."

She giggled and stood up, but when she did, she had to catch herself on the wall. She grabbed her stomach as nausea started to rise in her body. She gagged once, and just when she thought it was over, she rushed to the bathroom and emptied her stomach into the sink. "Ben! Please-" Another wave came over her as she puked again. What seemed to have lasted for several hours, lasted a few moments as she slid against the wall to the floor. She groaned to herself, hand cradling her stomach from the recent happenings.

She heard boots stomping down the hallway, skidding to a halt as the door was flung open to their shared room. He rushed to the bathroom and saw her on the floor. "Rey, what's wrong?" he asked with full concern as he crouched at her side.

She weakly shook her head. It was then that he noticed she was sweating a bit. She looked exhausted as she was slumped against the wall, holding her stomach. "Maybe I didn't eat enough..." she whispered.

Ben frowned as he nodded and stood up. "I'll go get you something to drink and something to eat. Will you be ok here?"

Rey nodded with a small smile. "Thank you," she breathed. Ben offered a small smirk in return before leaving to get her something. When he was out of the room, Rey closed her eyes with a heavy sigh. Her brows knitted together as she started to feel better. It seemed that almost as soon as it came on, it left just as quickly.

"Rey," Leia called softly from the doorway. The brunette weakly opened her eyes to look up to the older woman who'd walked here to see her. "Rey... when was your last cycle?"

Rey's eyes widened at the question, a soft gasp escaping her lips as she clutched her stomach. "W-what?"