Caroline let the water pelt some of the tension from her shoulders and wash away some of the frustrated tears on her cheeks. Why could things never go smoothly? A day or two of peace and then some big problem always seemed to come along. If Judith did decide to keep this baby, it would be a brother or sister for the boys, and it felt like something else to tether her to John forever. Judith certainly wouldn't cope with looking after a baby, a child, a teenager. John had been a good father to the boys, but he hadn't organised the doctor's visits, or dealt with all the drama that came with having a young child. Caroline had done all that. Would he expect her to do that again? She could already hear him saying that an extra child some of the time would be no more bother than her child with Kate. She couldn't cope with another 18 years of him popping by thinking he owned the house, 18 years of him taking advantage of her, and now of Kate, too.
A rush of cold air made her turn toward the shower door, only just able to see Kate through the steam as she stepped into the shower.
Kate silently put a hand on Caroline's cheek, and caroline covered it with her own, gazing at Kate for a moment before she kissed her.
"I'm going to switch my light off soon."
Lawrence promised when his mother entered his room that evening.
Caroline merely nodded, sitting on the edge of his bed. "…I have a favour to ask of you."
"I really didn't upset Kate."
"I know. She's not..it's not… this weekend, I know you're supposed to be going to your dad's, but Gillian has invited us to the farm. And much as I have been trying to think of an excuse not to go, I can't. So I'm hoping you might come. I can book a hotel room nearby if you don't want to stay at-"
"Cool! Is Raff going to be there? He said he'll take me out on the tractor to see all the land they use. Can we go and buy some Wellies after school tomorrow?"
Caroline was glad that this hurdle, at least, had been easier than expected. She smiled at her son and squeezed his leg as she stood up. "We can. I will definitely not be borrowing Gillian's old ones again."
"Will Kate be coming?"
"..not sure. Will doesn't want to come because he's got things due on Monday, so she might stay here with him if he's worried."
"So just me and you?!"
Caroline bit back a genuine smile at the sound of his enthusiasm. "Looks like it. Lights out. I'll see you in the morning."
…
"What did he say?"
"He seemed very willing." Caroline sighed as she opened the main bedroom door to find Kate stood in front of the mirror naked. It never ceased to amaze her how confident Kate seemed in her body. No one would ever catch Caroline naked except in the shower and very briefly before she dressed . "…we will have to tell people at school soon. You won't be able to hide it much longer."
Kate just sighed and continued to look at her hand where it rested on her bump, then reached out to grab a T-shirt to pull on."…I'm angry, Caroline. About Judith."
"I know. Me too." Caroline came up behind her and wrapped her arms around her, watching their hands meet over the bump under the T-shirt. "You're beautiful, Kate."
Kate turned her head to kiss blonde locks. "You're magnificent." She turned and melted into a hug, seeking comfort once more.
Caroline was surprised she fell asleep so quickly that evening, with everything on her mind. She shouldn't have been, given how well she usually slept next to Kate. For the first time in her life she was in the habit of falling asleep as soon as her head hit the pillow.
Tonight, though, something woke her. She couldn't immediately work out what, and listened for the boys calling out. When she heard nothing, she rolled over to check on Kate only to find the bed empty.
Rubbing her eyes, Caroline stood and pulled on her dressing gown, padding from the bedroom without putting a light on, hoping it might alert her to any light coming from anywhere else in the house. Thankfully, a small strip of light was visible under the door of Kate's study. She gave the door a gentle knock.
"Come in."
Her eyebrows shot up in surprise and she opened the door to find her son sitting at the desk with his glasses on. "What on earth are you doing?! It's 2am!"
"I woke up in a panic that I'd forgotten everything." William said miserably.
"Well, you haven't, and your exam is not for 4 days, so back to bed. If you're still worried this evening, we will make up some flash cards together. But now, bed."
William nodded, standing up and walking from the room. He kissed his mum's cheek on his way past. "Downstairs."
"Hmm?"
"Kate's downstairs watching TV."
"Well, she will be told to go back to bed, too."
This made William smile as he returned to his bedroom, watching his mum walk down the stairs before he shut the door.
She found Kate now asleep in front of a documentary, covered by one of the throws and the cat. Caroline stroked the cat as she considered Kate before ultimately deciding to leave her be..
When Lawrence thundered down the stairs the next morning in search of food, he was surprised to find Kate just waking up on the couch. "..did you and mum have a fight?"
Kate shook her head, running a hand through her hair before attempting to stretch the knots out of her back.
"…that's why dad always slept on the couch. Is that why me and mum are going to the farm and you're not?"
"We haven't had a fight, Lawrence. You two are going because your brother is very stressed and you enjoy teasing him."
Lawrence didn't look convinced. "Where will we live if you and mum can't live together anymore, now the house is sold?"
"We are still going to live together! I just couldn't sleep and I didn't want to disturb your mum, so I came down to watch the TV."
"Why couldn't you sleep? Was I mean to you yesterday and didn't realise?"
The sleepy annoyance in Kate's voice disappeared at this, and she couldn't help but smile. "No. Not at all. I'm just..nervous. About telling people at work about the baby. And when I'm nervous I don't sleep well."
"…I can tell people, if you like?" Lawrence offered hesitantly.
Kate's smile widened at this and she reached out to squeeze his hand before standing to walk to the kitchen. "Thanks. But I think I have to be the one to do it. Or maybe your mum…"
At that moment,Caroline shuffled into the room still in her pyjamas and made straight for the coffee machine without a word.
Seeing the worry begin to return to Lawrence's face, Kate did something they usually attempted to do away from his view and instigated a PDA by wrapping her arms around Caroline from behind, rewarded when Caroline turned around and cuddled into her as she waited for the water to boil, and Lawrence grumbling before taking his food into another room.
"Beverley."
"Caroline?"
"…Beverley.."
"Yes, that's still my name."
Caroline smiled at this, snapping out of her contemplation. "I know you're my secretary and it's your job to help me, but I also view you as a friend, and I've only just realised you've never come over for dinner, we haven't ever been anywhere together, anything like that. But you know all about me, and I think I know a lot about you."
"…are you asking me out on a date?"
Caroline's smile widened and she pulled her glasses off. "Very funny. No, I just… Kate and I… we don't talk much about the baby, at least not as much as I did when I was pregnant, but we were talking about him or her this morning, about telling people, and I realised you're the only one outside the family who knows. And you're the one who is forced to hear my chatter about the baby on a daily basis."
"I've been thinking about that, how to tell people, and I thought maybe just slipping it into conversation like it's old news might stop people congratulating Kate or talking to her about it so much. Then I thought, if you told people as a big announcement I might miss out on your daily musing about all things baby related because you might tell someone else."
"Oh, you're on top form today, Beverley. I will admit it, I am excited.I think about it constantly, and I want to buy everything, all the little outfits, I think about that new baby smell. But I can't talk to Kate about it, because then she will get worried about me if anything happens, I can't talk to my mum because she's still angry I didn't tell her straight away and I've told her not to mention it to Kate anymore. Did I tell you she got it out of kate that time Lawrence was in hospital with his shoulder? Practically dragged it out of her, according to William. Then had the gall to say that she supposed it was gods will if anything happened. After apparently telling Kate she lost a baby, too." Caroline pinched the bridge of her nose, annoyed about it all over again. "Anyway, the actual point of me bringing this up, is that both my boys were christened, and I would like to continue the tradition. Kate's agreed. And I thought, who better as a godmother than my very sarcastic friend Beverley."
"Me? Really?" Beverley smiled.
"Yes."
Caroline was startled when she found herself caught in a very strong, thankfully very brief hug.
…
That afternoon, Caroline walked the halls of the school while on the phone, needing some slight distraction from the droning voice of the man who thought that covering the cost of one scholarship a year gave him the right to dictate the whole running of the school to her.
Soon she spotted Kate making her way to another classroom, eyes down and concentrating on whatever she was reading.
Caroline let her eyes wander down Kate's frame, watching the way her body moved when she walked, watching the way her top briefly clung to the rounding of her middle when she passed an open door and got caught in a breeze.
"Kate's pregnant." Caroline practiced aloud.
The man on the other end of the phone paused. "Sorry?"
Caroline cringed. "I was.. it's..my… I'm…my… Kate McKenzie. The language teacher. She's pregnant. And I don't know as yet how long she will want to take off. All of her maternity leave, certainly, but we have also given people the option in the past to come back part time. If she will even want to come back.." Caroline realised they had yet to talk about that, too.
"…ok…"
"So, I don't think it's a good time to be trying to add any further burdens on the language department. You know as well as I do that any short or moderate term replacement teacher will not be as good. Nor will we get one who has the same languages, which means we will likely end up with two teachers to replace Ms. McKenzie." Caroline glanced toward where Kate had been to see her still standing there, and apparently giving Caroline the same appraisal she had just been given.
"…I sat down with her last week and she never mentioned this to me."
"No. She's…we are not going to do a big announcement, and i would appreciate it if you didn't discuss it with anyone, because you're the first to know, outside family." Caroline adjusted her weight to her other heel and smoothed down her skirt a little, which brought a smile to Kate's lips.
When Kate finally lifted her eyes to meet blue ones, she blushed at being caught. Caroline just smiled back.
"Why are you on yard duty?" Caroline fell into step beside Kate that afternoon.
"I have legs. And a dislike of hearing other people eating."
"Well, you'll have to come with me to the bike shed. I've been told there are shenanigans afoot, and I may need a witness."
"Shenanigans? Who reported that? Someone over 70." Kate followed the blonde. "When you go out with Lawrence tonight, can you pick something up for me if I text you the information? It's for William."
"Sure. As long as you let me buy you a present."
"Caroline, we've talked about this. I don't-" Kate paused as they reached the area behind the bike sheds. "There's no one here."
"There's me. And you. And no one else." Caroline pointed out as she captured Kate's lips.
"You made up shenanigans just to get a kiss?" Kate laughed.
Caroline smiled against her lips. "Uh-huh. Because I saw the look you gave me earlier in the corridor."
"You have the most magnificent legs."
"I don't understand how we made love twice yesterday and I can barely think about anything else because I want to again." Caroline groaned, resting her head on Kate's shoulder as she took a deep breath. "Angry? Have sex. Sad? Have sex. Happy? Definitely have sex. Had a good breakfast? Sex. Managed to stay alive for a couple of minutes after waking? Sex. Had a glass of water?-"
Kate laughed again, kissing her hair before resting her arms on Caroline's shoulders in a loose hug. "How will you be after a whole weekend apart?"
"You'll have to have a very big lunch on sunday, because you'll be spending Sunday night doing some very rigorous exercise."
Kate smiled, turning her head so she could capture Caroline's lips again, grumbling when the blonde pulled away. Seeing where her eyes were focused on, Kate offered an affectionate warning. "Caroline…"
"Two minutes."
"Ok. Fine. Two minutes." Kate replied, watching as Caroline sat on the bench and pulled her closer so she could talk to the bump and explain all about her question to Beverley that morning.
Kate stroked blonde locks and smiled.
Neither of them noticed the figure who watched briefly and then walked away.
"Those?" Caroline pointed at a pair of bright yellow gumboots.
"Mum. I'm not 5."
"They're adult size!"
"So is the matching raincoat, but I don't want either of them."
Caroline sighed and went back to going through her text messages. 5 from John complaining, 2 from her mother asking if she would ever see her again now she had moved SO far away, 1 from William in a panic that she had already replied to, and 2 from Kate. One held the information of William's present that she wanted Caroline to pick up, and the other new.
"Maybe we should start looking for baby things next weekend."
Caroline bit back a smile so Lawrence wouldn't think her weird, but that sentiment was ruined when she suddenly hugged him tightly in her excitement right in the middle of the shop.
