Just a reminded, the iruman segments are only semi-cannon/early drafts for ideas we had. We wrote this story ahead of time Far before we wrote Herioc Lifestyle.
Momo stood with Iruma at the gate, a few minutes before the challenge started. "So what's the plan?" He asked her. No, she couldn't do it, they would lose, like the Sports Festival.
"Um, how about you try and say some plans aloud, then i'll judge them." She asked, hoping to just go along with his.
"Alright then … let's run away!" …that was not at all comforting.
"And?"
"And what?" He tilted his head.
"How do you intend to run?" She asked, very concerned with his thought process.
"By going in the opposite direction of the danger...like I always do." She...huh? The boy was the top of the class, more fit then half of them in terms of quirkless scenarios, she thought he'd put more thought into his process.
"But how do you intend to avoid Aizawa, who's trained his whole life in traps, stealth, and quirk erasing?" She tried to hope for something.
"By dodging the scarf and avoiding all the traps. I've been quirkless for fourteen years and I've lived past far scarier things than a scruffy looking teacher, somehow."
"... Alright, I'll think up a plan." Because that would just end poorly. Unfortunately they had no more time, running into the fake city. Come on, come on, how do you defeat Eraser Head with power and creation. His entire power worked on line of sight. Iruma was eerily good at evasion even without using his quirk, so he could, even if it was for a second, avoid their sensei's vision.
"You should focus more on your surroundings." She heard him, turning up to see the man looking down on them. Shoot, too late. He threw caltrops at them.
"Look out!" Iruma pushed her out of the way, now dodging multiple ninja stars. "I thought you were trying to be non lethal!" He shouted as he moved.
"Villains won't give you that option. They also take advantage of their environments." Iruma broke through the ground with his latest step, caught off guard and jumping higher than intended, only to be grabbed by the scarff mid air. "There are people smarter than you all around, people craftier, trickier, people who can learn to keep up with your speed and evasion."
Momo almost felt herself pause for a second. If the strongest in her class could be caught off guard, what hope did she have? She could run for the gate, she could pass for both of them, she could make it up to him and..."You're right, I'm a moron, that's why I placed last in terms of grades!" He shouted. "But Momo is super smart, and I trust her to cover for me!"
Iruma...Iruma trusted her. He was confused all the time, always asking either her or Iida questions about school. Heck, he practically let her lead when it came to class organization. They read First Love Memories together after class! She felt so useful and...and it felt nice to be around him. She wouldn't let him down now!
"Take this!" She threw a basket at the man, which she made while he was focused on keeping Iruma's quirk from just breaking out of the scarf.
"Alerting your enemies to attacks isn't smart." He spoke, kicking the bag back to her … except it broke like the paper mache it was created from, revealing multiple flash and foam grenades. "... Well I'll be da-" He didn't get to finish, they detonated, both binding and covering the teacher in light and hard foam. Iruma wasted no time grabbing the scarf from the little opening he slipped his arm through, and threw Aizawa into a nearby wall.
"Sorry about that, but I didn't want to waste Momo's super amazing plan!" Iruma ran to the down body of Eraserhead and placed the cuffs on him. "Thank you Momo! I'm glad we got to work together!" He bowed to her.
"Oh...no! No, thank you! It was a team effort." Her face felt a little red rising.
"Oh no, this was mostly your doing, Momo! You're so smart and creative and always thinking ahead. You're always reading too and it's inspiring me to try as hard to be as imaginative as you!" … Oh Hagakure was going to murder her
What's Himiko been up to?
Himiko Toga smiled as the group of students approached. "Aww, here to rescue the bomber man?" She asked the cute brown haired girl and froggy that she made friends with.
"We're not going to let you take our classmate, no matter how much of a jerk he is!" Cute round face told her, avoiding a knife thrown her way. "Tsu, you alright? You didn't get cut, did you?"
"No, I'm fine, ribbit." Tsu spoke, aww, so adorable. They really cared for each other.
"Shall we take them too?" Asked Compress, spinning some marbles in his hand.
"Oh, and we can spend some nice quality time together." Himiko giggled.
"Can you hurry up and do what you're going to do, mr icy here is annoying." Dabi spoke, shooting blasts of blue fire at the two haired students.
"I can't hold him off much longer! Suzuki, Shoji, go, I'll be fine!" Halfy yelled at an ugly looking six armed guy and..oh what's this? A cute blue haired boy with blood flowing down his arms, so bloody and bruised!
"Iruma, where have you been!" Round face asked.
"I beat up a really red buff blond guy with a leaky eye!" Every villain stopped and stared for a moment.
"That maniac got muscular?" Asked Compress.
"This is the guy Shigiraki told us NOT to take out?" Dabi tilted his head.
"Oh, then that means we can be friends!" Himiko shouted. "Hey, can I have your blood? Pretty please?"
"Who in their right mind would-" The six armed student started.
"Oh okay. Do you have a knife I can use?" … What? "Actually those syringes look pretty painless. Would it be okay if I borrowed them or …"
"Iruma what the fuck!?" Every student asked, regardless of their current situation. Himiko could just stare dumbfounded.
"She said please, so that means she needs help! It's as simple as that,right? Isn't that what we're supposed to learn to do?"
"If a person asked you to jump off a bridge pretty please, would you-" Compress started.
"Yes." Froggy looked particularly exasperated.
"You would … you don't think it's disgusting or weird?" She asked tentatively.
"No, I mean you probably wouldn't ask something like that if it wasn't important. You probably need it, so I don't mind helping." This boy...Iruma...this is what Stainy meant by true heroes! Someone that could love her!
"I see, in that case, I'll help-" She was cut off, sucked into a ball. Aww, compress, you had to ruin the fun. Oh well, there was always when she was let out. Her Iruma-kins would wait for her!
Human Demon Bonding Time! Tomura and Kiriwo! Targets and chats.
Dabi felt many such problems and headaches occur since he joined this little shit show of a league. Sure, they had a message and power, but that was all. Tomura was the only decent guy in this whole place. Compress kept stealing his wallet, Toga wanted his blood because he was 'hot', Spinner was a stain fanatic fanboy, Mange … okay Mange was also decent, if a bit flirty. And Twice was crazy. Like, legitimately crazy, certified dissociative disorder and everything.
Point was, the League wasn't exactly his favorite people to be around, and it was only made worse with the exploding blonde dick Shigiraki was trying to coerce into joining. "So you just want another dick to stroke with those hands, that's what I'm getting right?" The brat asked without a single scent of concern for his situation.
"Keep making jokes, you'll see the right choice in time." Shigiraki rolled his eyes from his seat.
"You mean the choice that involves stuffing me in a void before dragging me into this random shithole?" He asked with a shrug. "Sounds sooooo appealing. Almost as appealing as letting that guy with the teeth eat me back in the forest."
"Eh, overzealous moron. He was about to be put down like a dog. All that confinement would make anyone crazy." Shigiraki huffed.
"I don't know, I kinda liked the guy." Said the … new guy. This was apparently a part of a new project from the 'sensei' that they couldn't get any news from. Everyone thought he was weird, and the dude just said his quirk was magic.
"Oh you would. Probably thinking about eating all of us at the moment, aren't you?" The leader pointed to him.
"Nah, all of you smell kinda repulsive in all honesty. Big bro was right on that front." He shrugged. "But what I don't get is why you want him to join, he seems so … nice." He called this nice?
"This is what you call nice?" It was repeated by Mange. "He practically called everyone a moron on live tv, constantly threatens to kill people and uses his quirk without restraint no matter what he's up against."
"I know, it's boring." The boy stood up. "The only people I can get behind out of this entire group are you two." He pointed at Toga and … Himself.
"Oh really, you understand me?" Dabi asked.
"Yeah, you're constantly putting yourself through terrible pain every time you use your power all for the sake of making someone close to you despair. Isn't that it?" The creepy smile could make even All Might shudder.
"... Pretty sure you break every kind of safe word I have." Even Toga wasn't getting into that smile. "Probably couldn't even love someone."
"Oh I do … but that's not here or now." The horned haired boy spoke.
"Right, we need to get Bakugo on our side. Now then-" Tomura was cut off by a gasp.
"Did you say...Bakugo...as in Katsuki Bakugo?" Huh, he knew that name somewhere?
"I thought you didn't know shit out of me you asshat?" The boy asked with a frown.
"Oh, I think I know plenty about you, Kachaan."
The boy jumped, despite the restraints on him. "How the fuck …." He asked with wide eyes.
"Oh, I was right!" He laughed. "Oh, fate really does bind us. You see, the love I met, you molded them." The blue haired 'demon' walked closer, now face to face. "You made them what they are, uncaring for themselves. Low self esteem, trigger words, scars. IT's all so perfect. The boy inspired me so much."
"The fuck are you … are you talking about …" The boy looked really pale for a minute.
"What I'm really trying to say is, from the bottom of my heart, thank you, thank you for creating Deku-kun." The boy looked genuinely disturbed at that last bit.
"... I'm going to kill you." That was the calmest he's been since arriving.
"Oh, I thought you wanted to kill Deku-kun. He's thought about it, you know. About what you said to him. 'At least it'll make Kachaan happy'. The bastard would smile even if it broke every last bone in his body." This guy was messed up even for him. "So the problem is something I wanted to ask you …" The demon held both of Katsuki's shoulders. "How do I make him cry in despair? How do you make it so easy? The only solution I found was drowning the whole world and making him worthless to save a single life no matter how much effort he put in …"
"You think you can do something as pointless as that!? You really are a moron!" Bakugo looked like he was going to burst out at any moment. "Deku's the most stubborn son-of-a-bitch I've ever met. Even when I was nothing but an asshole, he still kept following me, he still kept trying to be like me, like All Might..!"
"... All Might you say?" He leaned back. "So if we killed All Might the boy wouldn't have a dream to chase." He chuckled. "I see then, let's start there, it's as viable a place as any." The boy made it seem … easy.
"You think you can kill All Might?" Tomura asked. "The man has never lost a battle … once."
"Correction, he's never lost a fight with a human before." The guest snorted. "There are somethings in this world deadlier than quirks."
"Whatever. Even if you manage to make this shitty plan of yours work, Deku will still find a way to keep moving. If he's as big a threat to you as you say, he's only going to reach the top because there's nothing in his way!"
"I know ... he's become such a fine and strong person." The boy smiled. "So we'll just need to be better than the strong … Go beyond … Plus Ultra … Into Entropy." The league of villains felt that … driving the man into despair … like he would with Endeavor … Touya could get behind that.
What if … Clara had her Evil Cycle?
Orobas watched as the girl cried out. Apparently she had been unable to find this 'Izuku-kins', obviously some frivolous nickname for Midoriya, and had been growing more and more worried. Now he confronted her with Tauma, doubling the pain. So far this was going well, she would soon be eaten by the plant.
"No..Deku, stay away from me! Get out! Get out!" Orobas watched as Valac pounded her fist on the ground, her eyes strained and bloodshot."Get out! Get out! Get the FUCK away from me!" What? Her mana grew as her eyes became … slit, feral? "Now I get it … you piece of shit." She quickly formed a large axe, aiming it around with a spin as she eventually cut the beast in half. "Some manifestation of magic caused me to have nightmares. Amusing, if it didn't seal your fate." She..she knew he was there!
"No, you shouldn't be able to see me! You're the idiot of the Misfit Class! An utter babbering.." He didn't get the chance to finish as she cut the branch of the tree he was in.
"Correct, Clara is an idiot. You speak to Valac." She walked up to him, pulling another object from her pouch. "Now shall I punish you for your sins?"
"No, this isn't right! You took away everything from me! I won't be number two to another misfit any longer!" He tried to use his bloodline again, but nothing was slowing this girl down. "What, why aren't you..!" He tried to stand up, but his fall sprained his ankle, preventing him from running away.
"Because You've just made me live out my worst fear, so now I know what I need to do to ensure it never becomes reality." She held up a light. "Unfortunately I can't physically harm other students … but I'm sure that if you can cause me Trauma, giving you a seizure through flashing lights seems like a nice alternative."
"Clara!" Midoriya swung in near them, suit sparking . "I'm glad you're alright! There someone after …" he noticed the position they were in. "You stopped Orobas on your own! I should've never doubted you. I did say you were the strongest student in our grade."
"Izuku-kins, you're really…" Valac looked like she was about to weep. "Step aside, I need to end the threat entirely." She had the device still in her hand. "One press of a button, and he'll never be able to hurt us again."
"Wait what? No!" He shouted, running over. "You can't do anything permanent!"
"Of course I can, I'm about to do it right now." She looked at him like he was a moron. "Don't be a hero for once, Izuku. Be the bad guy for just a moment and let me HURT the bastard."
"Clara, you're not yourself right now." He spoke, trying to talk her down. "He hurt me too, but I don't want to ruin his life."
"The very fact he hurt you means I should. You're everything to me Izuku." She went to press the button, but Midoriya held her hand high.
"You told me when I was Deku you couldn't have been my friend, that I scared you away. Clara, right now you're scaring me. I...I…" Midoriya cried.
"He took you away from me! He took you away and put me in hell! I..I don't want to imagine a life where you don't come back to me, Izuku! I don't want to close my eyes because I'm afraid you'll go! Don't leave me! Please, please don't leave me!"
"I'll be here …" he hugged the girl. "And when you come back … when we finish this festival .. I'll be there with you." He spoke softly.
"Izuku-Izuku-kins-I.." Valac grabbed the boy's face and kissed him on the lips, hard, and passionately.
"Clara...I.."
"Shut up Izuku, let me enjoy this." Orobas was certain tongue was being used.
"So boring and sentimental." Ocho spoke up. "Clearly they're just mocking you, forgetting the competition as they-"
"I feel I can hurt you at the very least." She aimed her light and strobbed it, ignoring his companions' screams as she went back to Midoriya. "Where were we?"
Lesson time with Bloody Quirk Sama! How to hunt baby pictures.
Izuku: Izuku and the Calamity Cult here.
Azz: So this is what it's like to break the fourth wall. It...an experience to say the least. How do you deal with this new level of awareness?
Izuku: I just imagine it as my ability and everything sorts itself out.
Gaako: Yeah, not all of us are born like you though. Why'd you call us here anyway? Isn't this your thing with Ameri?
Izuku: We still do them together. I figured since we're trying to figure out what to talk about next, I should gather all of us here to talk about a matter of life and death in the meantime.
Eiko: How to have orgies?
Clara: How to kiss Izuku-kins?
Azz: How to murder and hide the body?
Gaako: How to take over the world without making everyone mad at you?
Izuku: … None of that. How to hunt down and destroy baby pictures your parents have.
Calamity Cult: Much more important.
Izuku: Now the first step is finding them, along with copies.
Azz: A tricky endeavor, especially nowadays when such material can be placed online and stored digitally. Physical copies however are easy enough to find. Usually in a locked drawer underneath a bed in the secret compartment within the center of a maze, at least, that's how it is with my mother.
Clara: My mommy has seen my baby photos, so she can just make them whenever.
Gaako: So we have to kill your mom …
Eiko: I can probably work up a mind wipe, maybe someone has a magic trick for that.
Izuku: Seems tricky, but better than murder. Good job Eiko!
Eiko: I aim to please. Also, I can just learn the entire history and process behind coding and whip up a virus to take away the digital files. Just give me two days, and I'll have it covered.
Asmodeus: Truly lucky to have her on our side. *Gaako stares at him* As a friend of course, nothing more.
Gaako: You better. The last thing we need is another love triangle in the group.
Clara: Triangles are fun! Oh, but rectangles are even better! Or even better, a five side-angle!
Eiko: I'm not sharing Izu with five people! I said three, and I'm sticking with it!
Izuku: Why did the authors have to make me aware of this now?
