I don't know if anyone will read this ¯\_(ツ)_/¯ It's been a very very long time. So please take this very very long chapter. (Spot the cameo characters!)

Hzz! Hzz! Hzz!

Squinting against the cold light of day that had filled your bedroom, your hand furiously jabbed at your phone. An entire bottle of wine after the complete curveball that had been the Odinson-Foster wedding the day before meant you'd let certain things slip; such as turning your alarm off. On one of your rare days off. Was that why your head was hurting?

You swallowed. Nope, definitely the wine.

Rolling over, you lay still and let out a long breath. There was a rustle, and then a soft thump and four paws landed on the pillow beside you. "Oh, no, Beans-" the cat settled in and licked you affectionately on the cheek. You grimaced as her sandpapery tongue made contact with the skin. "Okay..." Giving in, you burrowed your face into her fluffy grey fur for a few seconds, letting her purrs vibrate through you as the animal was happily petted.

This was comfy. And warm. Soon your eyes were closed again; until suddenly a click and a rustle, and then a yelp as Beans ran blindly across your face. Lifting your lids once more, you sat up as sound echoed through the apartment, before making your way out to the sounds of pottering around the kitchen.

"Well Beans, I don't know. I just don't think Peggy would go for a tin."

You lifted your brows at Steve's back as he set the now-empty can of cat food on the counter and took a draw from his water-bottle. "Who's Peggy?"

The water, which had previously been in his mouth, sprayed in a haphazard fashion into the air as Steve jumped. You squealed as he whirled around, shoulders suddenly square. "Ew, don't spit on me!"

"Sorry-" he wiped his mouth quickly before his voice turned accusing. "That was your own fault."

"How!"

"You snuck up on me-"

"In my own apartment?! What are you even doing here?"

Steve looked at you the same way that you imagine he looks at his ex-army pals who fell off the wagon. "It's Sunday? I feed Beans on Sunday, remember? I did text you but that was earlier so I thought you'd be in work."

"Nuh uh." Your head throbbed, and you quickly went to the cupboard that held aspirin. "Precious aspirin," you muttered, gulping them with a wince and Steve snorted. "I have the day off. Wait," you felt around before remembering you'd left your phone in the bedroom, "what time is it?"

"Half 8- ish?"

You groaned. "You text me at half 6? Why were you up at half 6?" Steve motioned a jog and you groaned. "You are insane. Nobody wakes up at half past 6 AM to go outside on a Sunday."

He grinned "You do."

"For work - it's coercion. If I had free will, I'd be in bed." He laughed and leaned down to scratch Beans' chin as you busied yourself pouring glasses of juice for the pair of you. "Not a late night for you then?"

"Nah, got back around 10. Tony was getting a little too fired up and I didn't fancy being on social media with him kissing me or vomiting all over me or something." That made you laugh. "Oh, I'm not joking. Look."

Steve held up his phone. NEW YORK BULLETIN: 'BILLIONAIRE BABY BUSTS BACK AT THOR RAVE' was splashed in bold lettering as a heading to what could only be an enthusiastic recounting of how Tony Stark went from smirking in his tidy suit, to being wheeled out to an ambulance throwing up peace signs with Pepper's exasperated face over his shoulder.

Your eyes skimmed the article. "The roof? How did he even get up there? What was he doing?"

"I don't even want to know," Steve muttered. "Oh-"

Clearly whoever had managed to weasel their way into the after-party had been well compensated; scrolling halfway down the page there was Jane and Thor, both looking very merry, holding what could only be-

"A gun?"

"Oh, god - I know what this is. Remember Tony's obsession with jetpacks?"

You stared at Steve, who had closed his eyes as if in pain or fear. "Yeah?"

"He was going on about how he's managed to break the speed barrier and channel it into the engines for his jetpack-suits-"

"I- His what?"

"Jetpack... suits." Steve opened one eye. "You know how you have diving suits, but with jets on them? Yeah."

Maybe you should have stayed after all. Steve nodded gravely. "Wow."

"Yeah I know, Icarus and all that." He gulped his juice. "Who knows, maybe he'll be the first man to fly after all."

"Through sheer audacity," you said, still skim-reading. "Oh no, look at this. Gross." Another headline, from another tabloid, this time with a much more salacious title. "Beauty and the Bulge: Jane eyes new husband's package pre-honeymoon." You both winced. "Thor's gonna kill them."

Steve shook his head as he moved past you to rinse out his glass. "Good. How do they even get away with it? That's at least slander. What did you write?"

You searched in his phone quickly, "Nothing like that. Formal photos, interior design, flowers, family statements - see, pure."

He glanced at the article you'd brought up. "Uh huh, sure, pure media."

"Well... a bit nepotistic," you conceded. "Not tabloid trash though."

"That I would have to agree with." Steve reached for a towel to dry his hands. "So I called it a night early, but so did you. Anything you want to talk about?"

Damn Steve and his concerned eyes. You turned to wander towards the window. "Not really."

"Sure. But if you did, you know where I am."

"Upstairs. Third floor. Your pipe leaks into my bathroom."

"In the building your parents own," he said, "which by the way, is kinda weird that the bigger apartments are on the lower floors?"

You shrugged, "Old building I guess. Half-rent's not too shoddy I hope though."

Steve chuckled, "You got me there."

You grinned at him, "Nepotism, you're welcome."

"Touche. Hey, did you hear about any of the stuff that went on outside the wedding last night?"

Your stomach twisted. "What stuff?"

He hesitated for the briefest moment, "Oh, don't worry about it, I think it was just some city stuff you know."

"Right. Oh, cab money..."

A few minutes later, after you had double-checked the approved article on Thor's wedding, and Steve was walking out of your door, you called, "Hey Steve?" He turned. "Who's Peggy?"

"No, nobody, goodbye!" The door closed behind him and you laughed.

On the couch, Beans meowed for attention. Snuggling in with her, you flicked on the TV. Today, you decided, was going to be a day for rest and relaxation and specifically no reminiscing.

Monday morning came too soon. Up at half 4 and out at half 5, you arrived at the office with a coffee in hand just after 6. Greeting the receptionist, you scanned your pass and made your way up to your floor where a veritable army of early-risers awaited you with just as many questions.

It was well after 9 by the time you finally had an empty spot to yourself. Sighing, you drank your water in one go, when a light tap came on your screen door and your editorial assistant popped her strawberry-blonde head in. "Happy to be back?"

"I should have taken a half-day," you responded.

Karen laughed dryly. "Agreed. So, morning edition's over - Trish Walker is calling in 20 minutes for you to okay her using the article from last Wednesday in her show, and then you have a call with head office to review the reception of the Odinson piece in an hour. Do you want to see the Bugle today?"

"On the wedding or on Stark's behaviour?"

"Both."

You winced. "No, I don't think so. If I want to hear Jameson's opinions I can turn on any media channel and they're sure to appear."

"Agreed again. And then the rest of today?"

"Emails, quarterly budget reviews, emails, talks with union reps for the holiday season celebrations, more emails, and then a review of the roster before the Thursday issue... Will that clear my week up much?" You tried not to sound too hopeful.

Your assistant took a moment to run through her mental lists before nodding. "For now, then back to usual with 5am on Thursday."

"Lovely."

Karen nodded and then snapped her fingers - "Oh! Also, I forgot to mention, there was a thing at reception just now, someone tried to come up but didn't get past security. Are you expecting anyone? They'll need a pass."

A frown creased your brow. "Nobody. Wrong floor maybe."

"Probably. Drop me a text when you want to grab lunch, we can catch up."

"If I can I will-" as if on cue, your desk phone rang. You waved her out and muted your laptop before answering. "Hi, Trish?"


The rest of Monday passed fairly quickly - and suddenly Tuesday dawns and you are back in the office again. Whoever is having issues with the building security has had no luck, according to Karen. While the rest of the city is having breakfast, you get a text from the new Professor Foster-Odinson.

Hi, hope all is well! Was wondering if you were free for dinner in the city tonight? I know a cute Italian place!

Jane is in luck - having done overtime the day before let you finish an hour early. You reply to confirm, and buckle back down into work.

When the clock hits 5pm, you are finished. "I'm going!" You tell Karen, grabbing a light jacket.

"Wait, sorry there's one thing-" she rushes off into the open floor and you wait patiently. When she returns, you look at her blankly. "These came for you not long ago."

"For me?" You look over the bouquet of pristine white lilies. "Are you sure? That's almost morbid."

"That's what I thought too, but I didn't want to say it out loud. There's a namecard."

It is printed, not handwritten. You thought over the few dates you had been on recently. "I... I'm not sure who this is from. Did they leave a message?"

"None."

"Right."

You both look at the flowers again before she suggests, "I could put them in vases the around the office, brighten things up?"

"Sure, go for it." You eye them again uncertainly. "Thanks Karen. Feel free to start a bit later tomorrow if you want, I'm anticipating Thursday to be a long one."

"No worries, have a good one."

You said your goodbyes and headed out. Nobody is bothering security at the door, so you don't think much further on it. The city is busy at 5:10 - Jane's restaurant is in midtown. When you arrive she's late, so you order a water. The summer heat is cloying and by the time she plops down into the chair opposite you have changed from a glass to a jug.

She blows hair out of her face. "Hey, hi! Sorry I'm always late, especially after class - thanks for coming!"

"It's no problem Jane, it's nice to see you. I thought you were on the honeymoon?"

"Next week," she corrects. "Schedules were just immovable."

"Yours or his?"

"Both," she says with a little grimace. "What do you fancy?"

Once food has been set down in front of you and you're both laughing at a meme Thor sent her, silence falls. Its obvious that Jane has something to say; neither of you have made an effort to see the other alone before. A few bites in, you spoke. "So..." She tucked her hair behind her ears. "What is this about? Something nice I hope."

"Haha. Uh, maybe? But honestly probably not. Just like, Odinson stuff? Since I'm officially in the family now." You mentally readied yourself.

Jane hesitates and you get the distinct feeling this dinner is making her uncomfortable. "So, at our wedding um, Thor's brother was there as you know, obviously. I was just wondering like... what the story is? This isn't an ambush though, so if it's not my business just say."

Was it her business? Maybe a little bit, you had to admit. You swallow your pasta. "No, it's okay. It's a sensitive subject for the family. What do you know?"

She takes a breath. "I know that Loki was engaged to you, went off the rails and did a load of drugs, went missing, then turned up on television last year for that huge trial. Otherwise, I met him for all of five minutes before the wedding. Seems like a busy guy."

"I bet," you mutter. "How long has he been in touch with the family? Is he actually clean now?" The disbelief in your voice is evident.

"Thor made him do a bunch of tests and they all came back clear so, yes, I think. And I think he was in rehab when he got in touch with Frigga - that was before the whole Thanos court thing - so about two years back?"

Two years. Two whole years of meeting Frigga for brunches and catching up with Thor over drinks - and not once had anyone mentioned him.

"I think they didn't want to upset you or cause any drama, you know," Jane says gently, reading your expression. "Thor said it ended badly, whatever happened."

"Well I did have a restraining order put on him," you admitted, "but that ran out four, five years back?"

Jane lets out a small "oh" and you can tell this is new information for her.

"So that's all they said?" you ask cautiously. "That's pretty vague. There's a fair bit to it."

"Yeah. They uh, they've been doing family therapy for a little while now, and it's pretty confidential, so I'm not really in the loop. And Thor never used to talk about him unless something urgent came up, plus I work like, a lot. So here I am, out of the loop."

Work and confidentiality - classic Odinson family values, you think to yourself, taking another bite of pasta. You savour it before sighing.

"It probably makes more sense if I run you through from the beginning?" Jane nods. You stir your drink for a moment before taking a deep breath. "So, I met Thor via Tony, who I knew via Pepper right? We were roommates and you know how college is. Anyway we all went to Brown, but Loki was in-"

"Harvard, right?" Jane interrupts. "Sorry - Frigga's got loads of pictures."

You laugh uncomfortably. "Yeah, she does. So Thor and Tony were big party guys, and the summer before third year started Thor had this huge pool party out at their house in the Hamptons."

"Odinson mansion," Jane mutters. You snort. "God I bet that was cool at twenty."

"It was pretty cool," you admitted, "although, Tony... well you can imagine. So yeah, big party, cool house, no parents..."

The Hamptons, Mid August Age 20.

As the car finally turned the last corner, you could hear the music through the windows steadily increase in volume. "We're here!" Tony announced. "Get out, get your drinks, and get wasted!"

Everyone who had been crammed into his backseat - bar Pepper, who Tony had saved shotgun for - spilled out onto the pavement outside the huge house. The double gates were wide open, the wide and long circular driveway crowded with vehicles and students milling about in throngs, holding red plastic cups and glass bottles. You already recognised a few faces.

"Damn," you heard Tony's friend Rhodey comment. "When he said beach house I thought he meant..."

"A boarded shack with hay on the floor? Come on dude."

The palatial white 3-storey colonial, with its marble pillars and floor-length windows was quite the opposite. You could see the glint of gold and crystal sparkling in the ground-floor windows.

The group followed Tony - who had obviously visited before - as he sauntered up to the front door, currently lying wide open. Inside was practically deafening, and the high domed ceiling of the foyer only amplified the noise.

Tony said something over his shoulder.

"What?" Pepper yelled.

His lips moved but the pounding from the speakers set up in every corner of each room drowned him out. She glanced at you and shrugged.

Finally you all ended up in the kitchen - which naturally was also absurdly large - where a generous selection of drinks were laid out. Spotting a familiar face, you headed over. "Hey Steve!"

Steve Rogers, current Brown track champion, was sitting on a barstool in deep conversation with another student who looked a little older than you. No, not a student - your eyes landed on the dog tags around his companion's neck - a soldier. "Oh hey!" Steve stood to offer you his seat but you waved your hand.

"Always such a gentleman Steve," his friend drawled, shaking his dark hair out of his face.

"One of us has to be," Steve replied cheekily, earning a punch on the shoulder. "This is Bucky, by the way, you can ignore him."

Bucky, you learned over a drink, was two years older than both of you and on Army leave. Designated driver he'd said, but the cup in his hand seemed suspiciously strong. "What do you think of this place?" he asked aloud. "Not too shabby right? I swear I saw a Klimt in the hallway."

"It is pretty big," you said, "Where's Thor?"

"Out by the pool with his friends from Norway," Steve responded. "They seem nice enough."

"His cousin's hot," Bucky commented.

"She's not his cousin," Steve said.

"Who?" you asked.

"Sif, if I'm saying it right? She's got black hair."

"And a cool accent," Bucky muttered.

Steve side-eyed him. "Buck's in love." The only reply he got was the ping of an elastic band snapping against his arm. "Ow Bucky!"

Deciding to leave them to their antics and whatever discussion you had invaded, you made your way out through the French doors that opened onto a long marble veranda, where the crowds seemed a little sparser. You squinted into the dark. Thor's backyard was huge - further the lawn down you could see light and hear music floating into the air.

Once you reached the poolhouse, Thor was easy to spot. He stood taller than most apart from Steve. Most of the others who Tony had drove were there too. You could see Pepper already in her bikini chatting with a few girls. Pausing, you stripped off your jeans and top and draped them over your arm. Joining her, you perched on the stone edge of the blue pool, keeping a distance from the rowdy cannonballers and frat bros.

"The Meachum's are here, I just saw Joy. Oh and I don't think we're getting home tonight," she told you, stretching back. "Tony's smoking something a bit... green. Thor's already said anyone who needs to can stay."

You rolled your eyes. "Of course. I wanted to say hi to Thor but he seems pretty busy." You gestured across the pool to where he was currently undertaking a kegstand. The silence grew as he kept going.

"Oh my god. Do you think he'll choke?"

"No way."

Thor kept chugging and you could hear Pepper making nervous sounds of amazement. Not the first time you'd witnessed Thor's legendary drinking skills, you surveyed the crowd around him. Making out who you thought must be Sif, standing next to her was a tall dark-haired man who could only be her brother with pale skin and a chiselled, handsome face.

"Norwegians really have the thing don't they?" you whispered to Pepper. She glanced at you. "They're all like, stunning."

"Pretty much yeah," she admitted.

You can't help watching Sif's brother - the way he moves fluid and elegant. Suddenly his eyes move and he's looking back at you. You look away quickly and say something to Pepper, a little embarrassed. When you return your gaze, he's still looking.

You lower your voice to a whisper. "Pepper, don't look. Who's the guy with the black hair, beside Thor?"

Pepper immediately turn to stare and you hiss, "I said don't look!"

"Sorry!" She turns back to you. "That's his brother, Loki. He's on the debate team for Harvard, Tony sort of knows him."

"Does Tony know everyone?"

"Yeah. Oh my god - he's coming over! He saw me looking! Sorry!"

Her warning gives you several seconds to compose yourself before Loki approaches. He's slighter than his brother but even more handsome up close, his eyes a lovely clear green. "Excuse me?" He sounds bored. "I thought I should let you know that your gossiping is incredibly obvious." He looks down his long nose at the pair of you. Both you and Pepper reply at the same time.

"Oh we weren't-"

"That's incredibly presumptious-"

He interrupts you with a snort. "Did you just call me presumptious?"

Pepper's eyes glance at you. You don't relent. "I... I did. Because... you are being a little presumptious. I could have been talking about anyone standing over there."

Loki's mouth quirks. "And yet, given your stammering and blushing, and the fact that your friend here - I'm sorry, your name?"

"Pepper. Potts."

"Nice to meet you. Given the fact that Pepper looks like a deer caught in headlights, I think my initial deduction was correct." When you struggle to shoot a comeback, he grins. "I study law at Harvard."

You smile back. "We're at Brown."

He looks at Thor, wrestling with some boy across the pool. "Of course. Business management then?"

"Journalism, with some business mixed in." The water splashes lightly as Pepper stands, and you look up to see what grabbed her attention.

"Hey hey hey!"

Thor's brother pauses before turning. "Hello Anthony." He sounds resigned.

Tony grimaces. His eyes are pink and unfocused. "Loki? Puh-lease, it's TONY. Do you guys want some...?" He waves the shoddily-rolled blunt in the air, nearly hitting Loki's shoulder with the lit end. Loki doges it smartly and takes a step back.

"No thanks," you wave him off. "Do you think you should eat something? You look rough."

"But in the best way!" Tony groans happily. "Pep?" She considers it for a moment, before accepting the blunt.

Your eyebrows shoot up. "You're a terrible influence Tony."

"Live, laugh, light up!" He throws you a peace sign before swinging his arm over Pepper's shoulder, not seeming to notice when she pushes him off. Both you and Loki watch as they wander off to a dark corner.

"Amazing," Loki says, "How he can possibly be on his third PhD is beyond me."

"He is kind of a genius, legitimately." You swing your legs out of the water and get to your feet. He's taller than you - your eyes are barely level with his chin. "We were talking about you, sorry. I was just wondering who you were."

He smells minty. "That's okay." His voice is far less austere now. "I'm Loki, Thor's brother." He hold out a hand and you shake it, replying with your own name. Recognition dawns on his face. "Oh, of course, journalism! Your parents run that lifestyle magazine, yes? The one all the rich and famous read when they want to know what fashion is in or where's best to go on holiday?"

You laugh. "Yeah, that one."

"Who knew Thor had such cultured acquaintances. Well, Father will be thrilled to know I'm befriending you. Make sure you get his best side." Loki winks and you laugh again.

"Friends already? That was quick," you tease him.

"It was, wasn't it?" Loki agrees with another grin. "Come over, I'll introduce you to Sif."


Jane listens quietly. You pause and take a sip of your drink. "It was easy, you know, we were studying in the same city. We saw each other a few times again before he asked me on a date and we were exclusive by Christmas. Thor warned me not to break his heart." You try to laugh light-heartedly, but it doesn't really fit.

"How long were you guys together?"

You answer automatically. "We got together at twenty, so almost six years. He's about a year younger than me. I started working before him, then we got our own apartment in the city after he graduated and started at ASGARD. How's Thor finding it? It's a big company."

"Oh, man I don't think I mentioned - he's actually looking to bring in a CEO to take over in the next year or so. He has majority shares, so nothing much will happen without his consent anyway."

That's news to you. "Oh, wow. Jesus, Odin would have-"

"Killed him?" Jane shrugs. "I know. But it's been a rough few years, and now he's got the company back to normal, we're thinking maybe kids soon? Thor's really looking forward to it. He's found this lady, Brunhilda, she's very capable."

"That's amazing! He'll be a great dad," you tell her sincerely.

She smiles at you, glowing. "Thanks - I know. It's pretty exciting."

You really do like Jane and you really are happy for her. But this conversation brings an odd feeling to your chest... Not quite jealousy. More like deja vu.

Odinson Penthouse, Oslo, Age 25.

"...Happy Birthday to you! Hip hip, hooray! Hip hip, hooray!"

You clap alongside the rest of the room as Odin blows out his candles. Frigga kisses him on the cheek; behind her float two giant gold balloons - 7 and 0.

"Happy birthday Odin," you tell him with a smile, leaning in for a hug. It's formal and brief, but not uncomfortable. Thor and Loki shake his hand in turn.

"Champagne, champagne!" Frigga calls, and the line of starched white staff huddled outside the dining room file through the doorway. "Gratulerer med dagen min kjærlighet," she tells her husband lovingly. He squeezes her hand warmly.

You accept two glasses of champagne from the nearest tray and hand one to your boyfriend. "Your dad looks happy," you whisper, trying not to sound surprised.

Loki hums. "He's always happiest in Norway. I don't know why they don't just move here."

"American money, brother. And you know Mother loves Madison Avenue." Thor raises his glass. "To Father!"

"To Father," Loki replies. Their crystal glasses clink together. "What did you get him Thor?"

"Mother got him a lovely watch and cufflinks, and I wrote my name on the card."

You shake your head. "Thor."

He has the grace to look sheepish. "I know. I never know what to get him though, what does he not already have?"

"Some time with you wouldn't go amiss," Loki says.

Oh no. You study the fine paper on the wall opposite, suddenly engrossed.

Thor's voice is a little less upbeat. "I'm doing stuff Loki, I'm busy."

"Indeed. The homeless of the world need your attentionmore than our elderly father. He won't be here forever, you know."

You lay your hand on Loki's arm, silently warning him not to escalate the argument you can feel brewing. Thor shifts his weight. "I know that. I just... I don't know. I don't know if oil markets and real estate is my calling Loki. There's more to life."

Loki's voice is incredulous. "Your calling?"

"You know what I mean!" Thor growls, and you see Frigga look over.

"Guys," you mutter, smiling at her.

Both Odinsons turn and wave. She frowns suspiciously. "The family needs you Thor," Loki presses. "You need to pull your weight. You're going to be CEO sooner than later-"

"I'm perfectly happy coaching kids soccer - why don't you do it?"

"Because, brother, I am also perfectly happy, where I am."

Thor makes a theatrical noise. "Oh, the world of arguments and court cases and ethics! Paradise!"

Loki swallows his champagne. "Well paid, mentally stimulating, and close to home. You need to grow up Thor."

"I'm older than you!"

Thor's voice raises, and several heads turn towards him. "Shh," you mutter. "Loki, leave him be. It's a party."

The blonde man seizes the moment with relief. "Exactly! Drink up Loki, we can talk about this tomorrow."

"You promise?" Loki presses him. Thor sighs again but nods, before wandering over to Frigga. You notice he keeps his distance from Odin's business partners.

"Lest he be asked real questions about his real responsibilities," Loki mutters, clearly noticing the same thing. You feel his fingers interlace through yours. "Shall we step outside?"

"Sure," you agree, following him out of the room into the adjoining lounge. It is incredibly luxe - more like a hotel than a home. "Are all your parent's houses gold?"

Loki chuckles. "Mostly, yes. If you see anything you like just ask, we barely use this place anymore. Besides, our bedroom could use a sofa."

"What for?" He shrugs, but there's a wicked light in his eyes. A smile curves your lips. "Loki..."

"Mother and Father are going out tomorrow to meet some friends. We could kick Thor out and have the place all to ourselves."

"I can be quiet."

"I'm not sure you can," he says, holding your gaze.

You stretch. He watches. "Only one way to find out." There's a bang and then a round of voices from the other side of the wall. Loki raises his brows. "Perhaps another time," you surrender.

"I'll hold you to that."

"Oh, I know." You smirk at him before wandering over to the window. Far below, snow carpets the clean streets of Oslo, glittering like powdered glass under the lamps.

Loki's voice comes from behind you. "Veldig vakkert," he says quietly.

You glance over your shoulder. "Hm?"

"Very beautiful," he says. His eyes are on yours again, soft as they always are when it's just the two of you. Your cheeks go warm.

He reaches past you and unlatches the window. Tiny snowflakes drift inside when he pushes it open, landing in your hair and floating down onto the thick carpet beneath you. The pair of you stand, watching people and cyclists go about their business in the dark evening.

How long you're stood there you don't know - but Loki clears his throat, and when you look at him he straightens his shirt. "Are you okay?" you ask, noticing the tension in his shoulders.

"Always. I hope you've enjoyed the past few days here. Norway's special to us - it's home."

"It's been lovely," you assure him with a smile. "I've already thanked Frigga for having me."

"Well you've been to the last three, so it would be odd if you weren't invited to this one."

You snort. "True."

"Mm. And I'm sorry, I know I've been busy, I will make it up-"

You press a finger against his lips, "You don't need to apologise Loki. You're doing well, you're headed for a promotion, you're winning cases. I'm proud of you." You smile at him and he takes your hand to press a kiss to it.

Silence falls again, and Loki shifts. Suddenly the door swings open - bringing a sharp rise of volume as Thor pops his head into the room. Loki whirls around.

"Oh, what are you guys-"

"Thor fuck off!"

"Jesus, okay!"

The door slams and it's quiet again. You try to hold back your laughter, "Loki, what the hell..."

He turns back to you and the intense look on his face makes your voice hitch in your throat. He runs a hand over his hair. "Sorry about that." You stare at him like he's grown an extra eye. "I'm just glad you're here, now. And I... I want you here, beside me, at every birthday. Forever - well, for the rest of our lives." He reaches into his pocket and pulls out something small and square.

Words fail you. It's not a surprise - god knows Frigga has hinted at it enough over the past few years, and Thor was always asking - but you were completely unprepared for the sheer emotion that hits you.

"I want to marry you," Loki says breathlessly. "And be with you always. Will you? Do you want to marry me too?"

Your vision swims. "I... Yes. Yes, of course I will!"

He stares, and then a smile breaks out on his face. "Really?"

"Yes!" You're really trying not to cry and have your mascara drip everywhere - you throw yourself at him and bury your face in his shoulder instead. His lips press against your head, your cheek, your chin.

"I'll make you happy," Loki promises. "We'll be happy."

You raise your head and kiss him fiercely. He flounders for a brief moment before regaining his balance. "I'm already happy," you tell him, laughing. He laughs too, and kisses you again and again and again.

Long minutes later, the two of you return to the dining room. The cake has been cut, and Odin is laughing at something one of his old Norwegian business pals is saying. Not much has changed, but everything suddenly looks much brighter - Loki exchanges a glance with you and smiles. It's obvious he feels the same.

Frigga appears as if from thin air, her eyes half-reproachful. "You've missed the cake cutting, I saved you some. And is there a window open? It feels a little drafty since you opened that door. Here; dark chocolate and caramel."

As you reach out to accept the plate from her, her eyes flick over your hand, and then again. "Darling!" she cries. You can feel Loki already laughing beside you as she holds your hand out to study the ring. "Oh, forget the cake! My darlings, congratulations!"

She throws her arms around you both, kissing your foreheads. "Oh Loki, well done! I was getting so worried!"

"Mother-"

"Odin, Thor! Odin! Look at this!"

If you were embarrassed before, this was nothing compared to the scene she was making. Odin excuses himself, and Thor jumps over a chair, landing beside Frigga in one smooth motion.

"Oh! Wow! Very nice - sis!" He embraces you freely, a big smile on his face as he moves on to Loki, chatting happily.

"Are you pregnant?" Frigga whispers still holding your hand.

Your eyes widen. "I, uh, no? No!"

"Oh, I wouldn't judge!" She assures you. "But you know... young love!" She pats your cheek lovingly as Odin arrives in the little group.

"Hva skjer?"

"Vår Loke er forlovet, endelig!" Frigga gushes. "Se!" She hold up your hand.

As ever, Odin does not seem overly surprised. "Ah Loke, gratulerer. Godt gjort, gutten min."

"Thank you Father," Loki answers, wrapping an arm around you.

Odin smiles at you. "And you too, gratulerer. Welcome to the family."


"They do have gold everywhere, right?!" Jane throws her hands up in vindication. "I told Thor it was weird, he has no idea-"

"None," you agree. "As if normal people have gold sculptures of their ancestors?"

"God - honestly, thank you! It drives me crazy!" You both giggle, finishing off your plates as you discuss the eccentricities of the Odinsons. Jane informs you that there is now a water fountain inside the hallways of their properties, which in her opinion is a drainage issue waiting to happen. "So, how did he get into drugs? If he wasn't even smoking weed at college; that's a big leap to make."

"Yes, it is," you say quietly. Clearing your throat you continue. "Did you meet Odin before he got sick?"

"I met him enough," Jane responds, "We didn't really get on... he was too, uh, is it wrong to say overbearing?"

"I know what you mean." You hesitate. "But you do know Loki's adopted?"

"What? No? Although it makes sense, he looks nothing like them - but no, I didn't know that. I thought he just had recessive genes or something."

That makes you laugh momentarily. "It was always private. I don't know if I should have said-"

"Oh you definitely should have!" Jane jumps in. She sounds irked. "Really Thor should have said something."

"It was never a big deal to him," you admitted. "He was Loki's brother and that's all I think he thought of it."

Jane's words are subdued. "I'm betting it was a big deal to Loki though."

The memory makes you grimace. "Yes, it was. He always felt that Odin preferred Thor, even when they were children. I don't know whether it's true, but he definitely thought it was."

New York City, February, Age 25.

You tapped the wood of the bedroom door gently. "Loki?"

He didn't answer. You pause before speaking again. "I've got food here." You open the door. Loki sits on the edge of the bed with his head buried in his hands. You set the plate down on the bedside table. What were you supposed to say?

"It doesn't change anything," you said. He doesn't reply. "They probably felt it would only make you uncomfortable-"

"That is exactly what Mother said." Loki looks up. He seems eerily calm. "Did you know?"

Your jaw drops. "Obviously not!" His gaze falls back to the floor. You sit beside him. "I don't know what to say," you confess. "But Loki, they still love you of course-"

"No. No, they don't. Mother does. Thor does. Father- Odin never did."

He must be in shock. You press in next to him, brushing his black hair out of his face. "I don't think that's true. What makes you think that?"

"Because he said so. He said to Mother, 'you're the one who wanted another child.' He was happy when it was only Thor; I'm just extra weight." Loki sounds bitter. "Makes sense, of course. No wonder Thor can fuck about as much as he likes, because at the end of the day he's their real son. Nobody else is going to be CEO of ASGARD because they only have the one."

Your mind spins with questions. "But- when did Odin say that?"

"Earlier, when they were arguing. I walked in at a most inconvenient time apparently." His fists clench. "Obviously it was not meant for my ears."

You swallow. Frigga had phoned you an hour ago, weeping, asking if you could get Loki to reply to her. This did not seem like the right time to raise it. "What were they even fighting about?"

"I don't know, Thor's job or shares or something. You think my parents are always happy - you've never seen them fight. It can be quite unpleasant."

"Maybe it was just said in anger? It doesn't mean you're not their-"

"I'm not their son." Loki's voice is deadpan. "All those times Frigga talked about how easy pregnancy with me had been? Lies. The story of how it had been such a surprise that she was expecting past forty? Lies. I don't even know if they named me - whoever my real parents are, it could have been them. I'm not really Odinson at all... not the slightest bit. I wasn't even born in Norway apparently."

"Where-"

"London."

You sit back and process it all. It's a lot for you to wrap your head around. Poor Loki. "She's been phoning me," you tell him softly. "She's desperate to talk to you Loki."

He presses his fingers into his eyes. "I just- I just need time."


Dessert arrives; fruit and ice-cream and a brownie. "Frigga and Odin told him everything they knew, answered all his questions. Odin even tracked down his birth parents. His mother wanted nothing to do with it, so that was that, and his father was involved in all sort of shady deals. Honestly, I thought he sounded like a thug. Loki didn't get along with him either, but I think that actually made everything worse."

"God," Jane murmured. "It sounds... horrible."

"It was. Loki was... Well he wasn't the same afterwards. Got angrier more easily, constantly picked fights with Thor and Odin. It didn't help that every time he went off on one and Odin got mad he would read into it." You paused and rub your head. "Sorry. Anyway, he started disappearing after fights - we were a little rocky at this stage, but I thought if we could push through, it would be a blip, you know?"

New York City, September, Age 26.

The pounding on the door kept going. With a hiss of annoyance, you drag yourself out of bed and make your way through the dark apartment to the spyhole. Glancing through it, you unlocked the door and wrenched it open. Loki stumbled in, pushing you aside to collapse on the sofa. You lock the door again.

"It's nearly four Loki. Again."

He ignores you and you raise your voice. "Loki! It's a Tuesday morning, you have work soon."

"I didn't ask you," he mutters. In what little light comes in from the street, you can see the sheen of sweat on his skin.

"Are you drunk or high?"

"What?"

"Drunk or high?" you repeat. He rolls his eyes and says nothing. You stare at him, in his scruffy suit and greasy hair that he's neglected trimming. "Where are your things?"

"How the fuck would I know?"

Don't scream. Don't swear. Taking a deep breath, you count silent numbers until you think you can be civil. "Do you have your wallet?"

"No."

"Keys?"

He pauses, feels around and shakes his head. You exhale, "Phone?" He waves it in the air. "Right. Well you need to cancel your card. Again." When he ignores you again, you flip on the lightswitch.

"Ah, fuck - what the fuck is your problem?"

You look at him closely, the deep rings under his too bright eyes, his sullen mouth, clammy cheeks. "Your nose is bleeding." Darting into the kitchen, you grab a piece of kitchen towel, and pass it to him. Loki folds it several times before plugging his nose.

"There. Happy now?"

You roll your eyes. "Sleep on the sofa," you tell him. "I'm going back to bed. Are you even going into work today?"

"Sleep on the sofa," he mimicks you. You grit your teeth and turn away. He might apologise once he's sobered up - but even that's started to change.

"You're only hurting yourself," you speak quietly. "You need to start being careful Loki."

As you switch the light off and begin to head back to the bedroom, you hear that same mocking tone. "You're only hurting yourself! Be careful! Bitch."

You freeze and then storm back towards him. "What did you say?" you demand. You're too tired to cry. "What is wrong with you? I haven't done anything to you Loki - it's me." He says nothing, but you are too awake now to let it go. "I am trying to be patient with you Loki, I'm trying to help you." He laughs and it makes you feel worse. "Don't laugh! Jesus, I barely recognise you anymore."

"Oh just leave it alone would you?" he snaps. "I'm upset."

"I don't care! The Loki I know wouldn't do this to himself - he'd pull himself together and deal with it rather than escaping into drugs and whatever else."

Loki stares at you as if you're speaking a foreign tongue.

"Well," he says slowly and purposefully, "I am sorry if I am not the Loki you thought you knew. But I prefer this one."

Despair wells up in you. You can't do this. You can't face another row. "Get out."

"What?"

You're already moving - unlocking the door and pulling it open. Light from the corridor spills into the dark flat. "Get out," you repeat. There's only so much of this you can take. "Get out of this apartment. Go home or to a hotel - but you leave. Now. Because if you're not the Loki I know, then it's not worth it."

"This is my fucking apartment!"

"No, it's OUR apartment! We picked the carpet, we picked the kitchen, we took the photos-" Loki's eyes move to the picture of the two of you in his parent's garden, the ring on your finger shining in the flash, "and you're ruining everything! So until you're back to yourself again, you're going to have to leave!"

He looks at you, then back at the photo. Then he stands. "Then I want the ring back."

"What?" Your voice breaks. You want to cry.

"It's my mother's, that fucking ring. Give it back to me," he demands. Your mouth opens and closes. Suddenly he's coming towards you; your feet move backwards away from him of their own accord. Close up he looks even less like himself. "Give it here," he snarls again - then he's grabbed your hand, pulling at the band around your finger.

Shock crashes over you. "Get off me!" you shout, shoving him. When your hand touches him, he shoves you back instinctually. Whether it's purposeful or not you don't know; but it's a hard shove and your back hits the corner of the wall, pain shooting up your spine as you lose your footing and slip.

You look up from where you've landed the floor numbly. Loki has frozen in shock, staring at you. He's surrounded by the light in the doorway. Like some kind of dark angel. He says something, but you can only hear the pounding in your head. "Leave. God, just leave."

He doesn't wait to be told again; as he backs out and disappears, you hear urgent whispering as footsteps patter in the hallway and then a woman's silhouette appears in his place. Your back still hurts as she rushes into your apartment, helping you up. "Oh my god, honey are you okay?" She sounds nervous. "He was so loud coming home and I heard arguing again downstairs, and then an almighty crash - my husband's called the police. Are you okay?"

"I'm fine," you reply automatically as she guides you onto the sofa and fusses for the light. But you're not fine. Nothing is.

You ring Frigga in the morning. She's worried about Loki, but she understands. You get the impression she's a little relieved too. "He got here early," she tells you. "Don't worry about any of that nonsense darling, I'm not letting him out of my sight."

Frigga is true to her word. Possibly a little too true, because when you arrive at their house some weeks later to see him , Loki is even worse.

The grand house is very familiar to you now. He's sat in the kitchen with Thor; on the same barstool that Steve and his friend Bucky had been chatting at the first time you'd been there. "What the fuck is she doing here?" he questions irritably when you enter the room. Thor narrows his eyes at him.

"He's been like this with us all," Frigga mutters quietly. She looks weary. "Try to ignore it, but if you can't I understand."

"Don't talk about me like I'm not here," he spits at her. She only sighs.

You decide not to take your jacket off. Placing the bag with his personal things down, you ask, "How are you Loki?"

"Like you care," he snarls.

"We all care, Loki," Thor says. You're surprised that he's so calm. Perhaps it's for Frigga's benefit. "Can't you just talk to us normally for five minutes?"

Loki lapses into stubborn silence. You examine him covertly as Frigga makes coffee. All their usual staff are gone. He's lost more weight - it makes him look taller and older. While he'd always had high cheekbones, now they protrude in a skeletal way. He sees you watching him, but says nothing, only looking away. For a split-second you think he looks ashamed.

Once your drink is in hand, Thor nods towards the garden. "We're going out for some fresh air," he announces. Loki scoffs.

On the veranda, Thor guides you away from the kitchen doors. "It's cocaine and meth," he says lowly without preamble. "We don't know where he's getting it from."

"Meth?" you question in horror. You weren't naive - people did drugs. But this seemed a world away from a line at a bachelor's party.

"Do you know how long?" Thor asks you.

"A couple of months, maybe longer? I couldn't really tell you, it was never in the apartment." He nods grimly. You clutch the hot mug between your fingers. "I'm sorry, Thor."

His voice turns sharp, "Don't be. You've nothing to apologise for. He did this to himself."

You can't help but feel that's a little too simple an explanation, but you nod. "When did you get home?" you ask.

Thor rubs his eyes. "A few days after he moved back. I was coaching some kids on a program down in New Mexico."

"Underprivileged kids?" you guessed. He nods. "You're a good person Thor." You mean it too - in the few short years since you had all graduated together, he'd seen the world and let it change him for the better.

Thor says nothing for a moment, before speaking almost to himself. "I need to come home. I need to step up. I should have done it before, but with Loki struggling now..." He stares out over the garden. You squeeze his arm. He is much broader than Loki; you wonder if he even notices it.

He does and even manages to smile at you. "Hug?"

You nod and he wraps you in a bear hug. When it's over you do feel a little better. "You'll be okay Thor," you tell him. "You can do it."

"Thank you-" The warm moment is cut off abruptly by the sound of something smashing. You both sprint for the kitchen.

When you dash inside, Thor is trying to restrain Loki, yelling and thrashing like a madman. You gape for a moment before your eyes land on Frigga and Odin. The patriarch does not look well, but there's anger on his face as Frigga talks nonstop into his ear.

"Brother - calm down and I'll let go of you!" Thor grunts.

"I'm not your fucking brother!" Loki screams. "Get the fuck off me!"

"What happened?" you ask Frigga frantically, "Loki please stop! Please just tell me what's going on?"

Loki finally breaks free of Thor's grip. He glares venomously across the kitchen. "God, look at you. Running after a man who doesn't even want you any more - is there anything more desperate or pathetic?" The utter disgust in his voice punches you in the gut.

"Shut up Loki!" Thor snaps.

"Don't tell me to shut up Odinson!"

Frigga is crying now, Odin's arms around her protectively. "Loki stop this! You're upsetting your mother."

Loki does falter then. But Odin continues, angrily, "What is the point of these tantrums? What have we not done for you, not given you? There are thousands of children in this world who can only dream of having lives such as the one we have enabled for you!"

You know what Odin means, but it's the wrong thing to say to Loki. Thor knows it too - your eyes connect for the barest moment before everything gets even worse.

"Enabled me?" Loki sounds aghast. "What have I ever done but tried to make you proud? Tried to live up to you? And it doesn't matter because I'm not your son. Just some charity case you deign to take in off the street, some worthless brat..." It's hard to listen to him talk about himself like that, and as he continues ranting, working himself into a frenzy, you can't tell how much is genuine and how much is fabricated.


You have to stop and take a drink of water. Jane has not touched her brownie.

"I thought it was marijuana at first - maybe it was, I don't know. But by the time the police got involved, he was on meth. I kicked him out because it was too much to handle and he moved back home, which we all thought would help because obviously they were paying for counselling and rehab. But Odin uh, forced him to go on leave from work, and Loki quit - work, rehab, our relationship. And then he just disappeared one day. I think they spent... possibly over a million on private investigations, and when they did find him it was because he'd turned up in court in DC defending some scumbag on a murder charge."

"What?"

"Yeah. I can't remember what it was, but the judge who was prosecuting turned up dead, there was some security breach and he was gone again. That's when Odin and Frigga dug a little deeper and the last PI came back - her name was Jessica I think? Well, she'd found Loki by accident while investigating a whole web of other awful things, and Loki was wrapped up in all of it. That was when we realised he was working with Thanos." You swallow. "Thanos is a disturbing guy. You know those scumbags who obviously do terrible things, but when it comes to consequences they swing by on a technicality? That's him. I don't know if Loki found him or if he found Loki, but either way, Loki got him out of sentences time and time again."

"Until he what, just stopped?" Jane says slowly. She sounds cynical, and you understand her exactly.

You shrug. "Apparently. I didn't pay much attention to the media or anything, I didn't want to see his face. But it's all online - Loki turned up, handed himself in, cut a deal in exchange for evidence."

"Wow. Huh. That... that makes sense then." She paused before continuing, "You know this is gonna sound weird but when I first started seriously dating Thor I was so intimidated by you."

Your brows shoot up and she laughs. "I know, weird. But like... there I was, just a science teacher-"

"Professor, Jane!"

"Sure, now! But my whole life was chasing storms and conferences and researching, just coffee and computers. And Thor, he's so..."

"Famous?" you supplied. You understood exactly what she meant. Your family may not be complete unknowns, but the Odinsons are a whole other level.

She laughs. "Exactly! Like Scandi aristocracy, chefs, chauffeurs, and penthouses, and people just stopping me in the street? I mean the Times and GQ were at my wedding? That's nuts! But yeah, I guess it just seemed like such an alien world to me at first and Thor mentioned you - this woman who had already done it all and effortlessly apparently... Frigga loved you, so did Thor; you were basically one of them right? So... I did build you up a bit to be this person who, I don't know, seemed alien too."

You sipped your drink thoughtfully. "Well, as you know now, it was definitely not effortless. I'd say you got the easier end of it, honestly."

"Yeah, I think so." Jane sighed and shakes her chestnut hair. "Thanks for telling me, I really do appreciate it. Thor just never wants to get into it, which I understand now, but I was pretty confused."

"It was a really hard time, for everyone involved," you reply. Your throat is a little thick. "I bet Frigga is loving having them both back home though."

"Oh - uh, Loki doesn't live there."

"Oh... right." You don't question it further - in fact, you'd rather not know much about Loki's current life at all. Instead you say, "This was nice Jane."

She brightened. "It was! Thanks again."

When dessert is over the sun is setting. Jane insists on getting the bill and you insist on paying your share, which hinders everything for a solid minute. Finished, the two of you make your way outside. As the door swung shut behind you, a flash of deep red hair caught the corner of you eye and you reflexively looked towards it. It's not Karen, so you dismiss it.

Outside sits a car and driver for Jane. She turns to you almost apologetically. You shake your head, "Don't apologise, I loved their cars. Very handy."

"Oh yeah, midnight Mcdonalds? Super easy." You share a chuckle then she offers a lift.

You decline. "I'm out of your way, I'll just grab a cab. Thanks though. Jane?" She raises a brow. You clear your throat awkwardly. "Thanks for asking me about everything instead of just reading tabloid trash. I appreciate it."

"Yeah of course. It seemed, sneaky I suppose? Sorry if this brought back bad memories."

There's no way you would tell her that the worst memory had returned at her wedding. "It's fine. See you soon Jane!"

As you turned to head off down the sidewalk, she speaks up again. "Before you - uh, there's juut one thing I think you should know."

The knot in your stomach, which had eased away during the meal, returns. "Yes?"

"Loki's back in the city again, for a while at least. He's bought a place not too far from here. And he's started a new job. So I think he uh, I think he might be here for good maybe. I think you should know, in case you come over to see me or Thor, to call ahead. If you want to avoid him."

New York was one of the biggest cities in the world; and yet it suddenly felt terribly small. It's stupid to be surprised, you told yourself. Even if he hadn't made up with Thor he could have come back. "Thanks Jane."

She nods unsurely, and then gets into the car. It glides away smoothly, taking her back to the life you had once lived. Watching it disappear among the traffic, you decide that when you reach home you will give Steve a call. Maybe you could do with that talk after all.