Xira enjoyed spending the holidays with her mother. As always, their small home was completely decked out in Christmas decorations. Being back in her home, smelling the distinct scent of her mother's cooking, feeling the soft satin of her bedsheets made her feel safe.
Her mother was dressed in red, gold, white, or green every day to celebrate the season. Adelise was a big Christmas person, and her holiday cheer was infectious. Xira didn't forget her problems back at Hogwarts, but she was able to ignore them.
Now though, winter break was coming to an end, and the new year was starting. A new year sure, but the same problems. Her mother was bringing her along to a small muggle New Year's party; Adelise was already ready. Adelise wore an elegant silver dress and had her curls sprawled around her.
Her lips were painted dark purple, and she had diamond earrings in her ears. Overall, Xira thought her mother looked beautiful. Xira honestly didn't feel like going to this party, but she didn't want to ruin her mother's mood. Adelise knew Xira too well, though.
"What's wrong, sweetie? Ever since you came back, you've been so distracted." Concern was shining in her mother's dark eyes. Xira tried to shake her head and smile, but she knew her smile was weak, and her eyes were still far away. Adelise saw this on her daughter immediately.
She came away from the mirror she was using and crouched down so she could look Xira in the eyes. One hand on Xira's shoulders to stabilize herself a little better and to offer Xira some comfort, the other hand rubbed her cheek affectionately in a way Xira was familiar with.
"I know something's wrong, you're my baby, and I know when you're bothered." Adelise was too good at reading Xira because Xira felt a few hot tears slip from her eyes. She really tried to hold them back, but her mother's warm questioning brought all her emotions back up.
"It's just..." Xira tried to start but had no words. She bit her lip so it wouldn't shake; she felt like a baby crying for her mummy. Sometimes Xira wished she wasn't close with her mother. Maybe it would be easier for her not to tell her mother things she wanted to keep hidden.
"You remember Harry?" Xira looked up from her hands to lock eyes with Adelise; she saw that her mother was trying to think.
"That boy, you wanted to stay here for winter break?" Xira nodded; she took a deep breath as she prepared to say this next part.
"When I told him he was staying with us over winter break, he got mad. He told me he didn't want to spend Christmas with us. It just really hurts because he's my only friend at Hogwarts, and I know we haven't known each other long, but he means a lot to me." Xira sniffled, wiping her nose on her sleeve.
"You didn't ask him first?" Xira felt her heart twinge at her mother's question. It sounded like she was already taking Harry's side.
"I didn't think I had to ask!" Xira exclaimed defensively, her mother's face softened.
"Baby, not everyone is like you. I know you were just trying to be nice and offer some hospitality, but Harry probably didn't see it that way." Even though Adelise's words were calm, Xira's anger grew at them. She just wanted her mother to comfort her. She didn't want to hear why she was wrong.
Xira stood up; her mother was still crouched down. Xira stomped off; she didn't want to deal with anybody right now. She felt sudden rage take her; it was irrational but uncontrollable. She wouldn't yell at her mother, but she wouldn't face her either.
"Xira!" She ignored her mother's alarmed shout. Xira threw open her door then slammed it behind her; she collapsed onto her soft bed. She heard Adelise's footsteps approaching, but she didn't move. It was only when the door opened did she finally lookup.
Adelise had a large frown on her face as she stared down at her daughter. Xira's eyes were red-rimmed but angry. Xira just wanted her mother to leave her alone; she regretted telling her mother what was happening.
"I understand that you're going through something, Xira, but you don't storm away from me like that, and you certainly cannot slam my doors." Her mother's voice hinted at her irritation, not just at her daughter's attitude, but at not understanding her too.
"I don't want to go to the party anymore..." Mumbled Xira, turning away from her mother. Xira wanted nothing more than to be alone, her mother was no longer comforting, but instead, she was a bother. Adelise sighed deeply, shutting the door gently to let her daughter be.
Xira let her sobs finally come. Everyone was stupid to her then; she felt so isolated and misunderstood. Even her own mother didn't get her. Xira squeezed her dragon stuffed animal, she screamed into it, letting out some of her overwhelming emotions. Then she held it tightly to her chest.
Xira didn't do anything for the rest of that day. She felt so stupid for that; she should be doing something. But Xira didn't have the motivation for anything, no inspiration to study or do her assignments, and certainly no want to take up any of her hobbies.
Xira knew she should take her mind off it instead of wallowing in her grief, but she just didn't feel like it. She heard her mother come home at twelve at night, and Xira pretended to sleep when Adelise dipped her head in to check on her.
Xira felt her mother's hands pet her hair, and Xira's bed creaked slightly from the weight of Adelise. Against Xira's wish to be mad at her mother, the feeling of her safety infected Xira. Her mother exhaled, and Xira could feel the mental and physical exhaustion radiating from her.
Was that her fault? As much as Xira wanted to be selfish and just be mad, she couldn't when she heard her mother's obvious tiredness. She hated being an annoyance to anybody, especially her mother. Xira always felt she held Adelise back, and being more of a problem made her guilty.
"Goodnight, baby." And Adelise left after giving Xira a kiss to her temple. As soon as Xira heard her door shut, she moved to stare up at her ceiling. She was loved, if only by her mother. Sure, Harry's rejection hurt but taking it out on her mother only made her feel worse.
Xira would apologize to her mother in the morning, and she would pack her things later. Tomorrow she was going back to Hogwarts. If Harry wouldn't talk to her, she'd be okay. Maybe Xira could attempt to befriend other houses. Bias against Slytherin ran strong among the others, though.
Thinking about the future won't help Xira; sleep would. So, she decided to close her eyes and tune out all thoughts about what was to come. Sure, she could have plans, but she couldn't expect any of them to work out. Xira eventually did slip off to dreamland.
"I'm sorry, mother..." Adelise looked barely awake; she was still stirring her morning tea. Xira never liked tea, but her mother said she would one day. Xira had an earnest look on her face, eyes full of shame. She exaggerated the expression a touch, but she wanted to show her mother she was genuinely sorry.
"I forgive you, dear." Xira's mother sounded detached, though, her eyes closed and face pinched. Long mahogany fingers twirled the teaspoon absentmindedly. Their kitchen was a quaint little room with flowery wallpaper, dark brown cabinets, and slate countertops.
It wasn't anything special, but it had a very welcoming vibe. A small white table was where Xira and her mother would eat, simple but plenty enough for them. Minor scratches could be found all around the house. Each mark held a story of their lives.
"Are you alright?" Xira asked, worrying finding its way into her voice. Adelise groaned, gripping her skull. She shook her head, though; Xira wasn't sure if it was meant to say she wasn't okay or if it was to clear it. Adelise's hair looked matted, and her makeup was still on her face but very smudged.
"Muggles have some strong alcohol, stronger than anyone would think. I'm just hung-over baby, it'll be fine after some toast, jam, and a hangover potion." She shot Xira a grim smile. Xira's mother often got drunk; Xira guessed it was to forget about the life she left behind for a little.
"Want me to get a hangover potion?" Adelise thought about it for a second, taking a long sip of her tea. She closed her eyes to savor the taste of it. Xira stood awkwardly at the entrance of the kitchen, watching and waiting for her mother's answer.
"No, I'll fetch it myself. You just sit down and eat, I made sausage and eggs, but I found I couldn't stomach them." Xira walked over to their stove. She piled some eggs and sausage on one of her mother's porcelain plates.
They lived in a muggle neighborhood, so their house wasn't very magical. Adelise had gotten into the habit of not using her magic often, as using it might accidentally set off the ministry or get them caught by muggles. Xira almost didn't mind this; she thought that wizards were too used to things being easy.
Xira grabbed one of her favorite mugs from the drawer and went to the fridge to fill it with milk. It had a little pig on it. She heard her mother downing the potion and gagging slightly on it. Xira chuckled; it was always funny to watch her mother's reaction.
"What? Do you want to drink this thing?" Asked her mother bitterly but with some amusement, and Xira quickly shook her head no. No way that potion tasted pleasant. Xira sat down in front of her mother and started to devour her eggs with relish.
"So, are you going to pack your stuff up today? I can't help you as I've got to run some errands, but I trust you can do it yourself." Xira's mouth was full of eggs, so she couldn't answer. She swallowed it and drank some milk to help it go down easier.
"Yeah, I'll do that later, don't worry, mother." Adelise nodded absently, then her eyes lit up like she remembered something.
"Oh, actually, I want you to clean your room too. When you left last time, your room was a disaster that I had to clean up. So please do that before you leave." Xira groaned at the prospect of having to clean her messy room but agreed she would do it.
After that, her mother finished her tea and picked up her plate and mug to move it into the sink. Adelise then went into her bedroom to most likely take that nap she was talking about. Xira was left by herself to think, but she refused to think about what was nagging her subconscious.
She thought about how she was going to pack her bag and what she would do once she was at Hogwarts once more. She worried about the assignments that still sat in her trunk unfinished and the stain she accidentally got in her history book. Yet, she never once thought about Harry that morning.
So yeah this chapter is mostly about Xira, but its also a day early and pretty long so...Also I think imma start rewriting again but I won't postpone (semi) weekly updates so no worries! Thanks for reading guys!
-Lemon Nugget
